what did the tree say to the other tree? Don't leaf me!

What did the caterpillar say when he emerged from his chrysalis? I am a butterfly.

How do u bring a dead person to life? U dont.

Q: what's red and goes up and down? A: a tomato in an elevator

Why did the chicken cross the road? Since chickens cannot speak, it is difficult to say.

What did the falling bridge say to the other bridge? Well bridges can't talk but if it could it, then it would say AHH! I am falling

What do a Fascist and a Democrat both have in common? Involvement in politics.

Knock knock. Who's there? Your mother.

What happened to the boy with AIDS? He died at the age of 12

I haven't left my basement in 29 years

Why did the boy have no ankles? Because his legs were amputated

How do you make an idiot laugh? Tell him a mildly funny joke relating to bodily functions, such as defecating or passing gas.

What did the grizzly bears have for lunch? Fish and tourists.

why did the dog went inside the church? because the door was open.

Why did the chicken cross the road? Because the marginal benefit of doing so exceeded the marginal cost.

What did the man in need of a prosthetic arm get from the hospital? A diagnosis for cancer.

whats fat, green and hairy? Nothing I would pleasure myself to.

what happens every day? People die

Knock Knock Who's there? Interrupting owl Interrupting owl- HOOOOOOOOOOOO

What is the difference between a rabbit and a stick? One lives and one not.

What's red and green and goes 100 mph? A frog in a blender

Roses are red Violets are blue I have genital warts Now you do too

*insert lame joke stolen from the top 10 jokes and act like it's original because I changed one word*

"...."-Hellen Keller

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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