What's the difference between a dead baby and a Ferrari? I don't keep a Ferrari in my garage. (????)?

Why was the cancer patient in the hospital? Her mother threw a rock at her head.

Roses are red. Violets are blue. I am colourblind so screw you!

What do you call Jack Black on a bad day? Kevin Hart.

How many Jews can you fit in a car? Comfortably, four.

If you see a fat man, what do you say to him? Hopefully nothing mean, seeing as that would be demoralizing to the fat man.

What does a cupcake get for Christmas? A fat kid.

Your mom's so ugly that after being ridiculed for for year she became very self conscience and killed herself. Her family was very sad for many years.

why did the imagrant cross the road the cops were on his tail for false identity of the chicken

There are two muffins sitting in an oven. One muffin says to the other, "It sure is hot in here". The other muffin says, "Yeah like 350, 375".

why did the chicken cross the road because the farm is across the street from were it is now

why did the kid struggle in school? because hes mentally retarted

How long did it take the world's most powerful democracy to elect a black President? Less than a day.

Hello, my name is John, and you are reading this paragraph. Find the mistake...

As little Timmy crossed the finish line his heart raced with excitement he had just won the big race. Later he and his family went home to celebrate they had pizza and chips and soft drinks. Then they played scrabble and watched spiderman 2. After that Timmy went to sleep. When his parents found him that morning they mourned and mourned because their hero little Timmy was still asleep.

A guy walks up to his boy and tells him, "Hey, if you don't stop masturbating you'll go blind." The boy says, "Who are you? Your not my father."

What do you call a Mexican in a kitchen? A chef.

What do Mike Tyson's handwriting, the Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles and your Grandma's apple pie have in common? Nothing.

Q. You are driving a car. In front of you there is a camion driving at your same speed. Behind you there is a helicopter flying at your same speed at the ground level. On your left there is an ambulance driving at your same speed and on your right there is a ravine. How do you get out from this horrible situation? A. Get off the carousel.

A Christian walks in into a bar . . . mitzvah.

What do you call a man who interru- SHUT UP!

what goes ha ha ha ..plop? We are all going to die.

What do Mike Tyson's handwriting, the Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles and your Grandma's apple pie have in common? Nothing.

Why was the ginger crying? Because they used him as the fire hydrant.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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