Roses are red Violets are blue Refrigerators are whitWhen falling from trees, they kill you

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this site is an antijoke

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I'm not saying my mother-in-law is fat, because she is anorexic.

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? Because it was dead

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Half empty = half full Therefore Half (empty) = half (full) empty= full Half empty

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What did the KKK member say to the african american man. Nothing, he just killed him.

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What did squidward do when SpongeBob asked him to be his friend on Facebook? 1.declined it 2.got a restraining order against him 3.wondered how computer generated cartoon characters could send and decline friend requests

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It's a bird! No, it's a plane! No, it's actually a bird. You can see its wings flapping.

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Steve, what do I write on a 3946 if more than two vehicles were involved?

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There once was a man from Nantucket, Whose body parts were all adequate and thus could not perform any odd sexual acts upon himself.

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one time there was a fukc then it taked a shat potated pancocks cancer is fuCk 18 why did the cock cross the choad? fUcK

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Why did the chicken cross the road? To get to KFC for his job interview

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how do you kill a little girl? seeing as murder is a federal offence i will not tell you how. you should be ashamed for asking.

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Uhh, yeah, some of it, I mean people never looked me in the eyes on the buss really, I dunno,if you think I am pretty maybe it is just your opinion or something, but thanks, you are hones and its nice. Never been out drinking, I am you know, kinda nerdy, I just prefer hanging out with friends at home.

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Knock-Knock Who's there? We are, now open the door! Wait im masturbating!!

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Why does no one like fat people? Because of Jesse Ziegenbein

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what's red and smells like water? Red food-coloured water.

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The probability of someone watching you is proportional to the stupidity of your action

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Obama.

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Inspirational speaker: "You can judge a man by the way he treats those who can do nothing for him." Me: "Hitler loved dogs."

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How many Jew can you fit in a car? As many as the car seats comfortably.

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Q:Why did the Mexican cross the border? A:To come to America to provide for his starving family.

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There was an English man, an Irish man and a Scottish man. The Welsh man couldn't make it. Again.

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what do you call a sick eagle illegal

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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