Roses are red, Violets are blue, come at me again and I'll punch you

Knock Knock, Who's there? Nobody..

Did you hear about the black guy who went to college? No? Well he graduated in four years with a degree in chemical engineering. He worked hard all four years in order to keep his scholarship to the university. Now he leads a very successful life and lives in a large house with his wife and two children.

Why did the Asian drive his car into a tree? His contact fell out.

What do you call Santa's helpers? Chinese factory workers, who live in impoverished conditions, work up to 16 hours a day, earning slave wages. God damn you, Steve Jobs and Mattel.

Q: What did one water bottle say to another water bottle? A: Nothing. Water bottles are inanimate objects and are thus unable to communicate.

The queen is killed on sunday there are three suspects the cheif the princess and the butler The princess' said she was getting lunch The cheif said he was making lunch The butler said je was getting the mail So who did it A: the butler they dont diliever mail on sunday

What's worse than finding an apple in your worm? Lebron traveled

Your Mama's so fat she can't fit into a toy car!

ginger

What did the one Brick say to the other Brick? We have the same name.

What sits on a shelf and says hey im a book? A person who thinks hes a book.

What happened when the chicken crossed the road? He was hit by a bus!

What's big, white and will killl you if it falls out of a tree? A polar bear.

What do you call a black man who has become a millionare? A financhaly successful buisnessman who worked hard to be where he is today.

Whats worst than finding half a worm in your apple? Getting rapped by a giant scorpian

I am a schizophrenic, so am I.

Whats red and black and has 8 legs? 4 dead african babies.

Roses are red, Violets are blue, You smell like ass, And no one loves you!

Why did the blond cross the road? The police officer who arrested her for shoplifting parked his car on the other side of the street.

Two bananas are walking down the street. One says, "Nice weather we're having, isn't it?" The other banana says, "Wait a minute, fruit can't talk." The second banana turns into a dove and promptly flies away.

Q: What do you do if A bunch Of black Guys Are raping a white Girl A: Throw A Basketball at them.

why did the polar bear bury his face into snow? because he saw the 241543903 post and wanted to join in so he used a portal gun to teleport his head into some guy's freezer.

what came first the chicken or the chips

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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