Why couldn't little Sally fall asleep? She was on fire.

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A man suffering from terminal cancer walks into a bar and orders a soda because his doctor advised him not to drink. The bartender and others in the establishment are completely unaware of his disability.

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Why was the black man running? he was participating in race for the cure, a charity event where all proceeds go to breast cancer awareness.

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Why did the cow have to travel everywhere by an electric scooter? It had motor neurone disease.

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Why couldnt the old man ski? There was no snow.

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Tic tac toe Your mother and I are getting a divorce.

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What is black and likely to fail? A chain smokers lungs.

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whats worse than unloading a truck of dead babies with pitch forks? Finding one alive

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What's red, fast, and flies through the air? A tomato in a plane.

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There's two bears in the shower. One bear says "pass the soap". The other bear says "no soap. Radio".

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Ask me if I'm a carrot Are you a carrot? No

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On Wednesday night, a drunk man was walking on the cliffs of dover. his funeral was saturday.

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If I said you had a beautiful body would you stop asking me if those jeans make you look fat?

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When faced with an impossible question. I like to give, and maybe receive, an impossible, yet endearing, request/answer to the problem. Sex?

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What happened to the boat that sank? Everyone on it died

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What'd the left nut say to the right nut? How's it hangin?

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Why did the boy scratch his back? A:because it was itchy.

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How many mexicans does it take to change a lightbulb? Juan.

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What would Muhammed do?

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Yo mama so fat when she dresses in red she looks like clifford the big red dog!

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What did the drunk man say to his wife? "I love you, Honey"

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How do you know if you're gay? You find yourself sleeping with people of the same sex.

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What fires shots? A gun

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Roses are crimson. Violets are purple. I don't understand why this poem is so popular.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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