Why did the gay guy come out of the closet? He finally found the shirt he was looking for

thumb_up thumb_down -2

Your mom was diagnosed with aids. Her prognosis was 6 months....clearly this joke is about the Holocaust.

thumb_up thumb_down +22

Why does Michael J Fox have such good handwriting? Through years of hardwork, perseverance, and rehabilitation.

thumb_up thumb_down -39

What does Paris Hilton eat on Tuesdays? Nothing.

thumb_up thumb_down -6

Shut the cork up!

thumb_up thumb_down -4

Why do things made by Glen taste so good? Because he has mastered the cream

thumb_up thumb_down -25

roses are read violets are blue my fanny is orange I have the flu my name is gemma

thumb_up thumb_down -25

a duck, a mexican, a camel, a jew, a duck, a moose, an asian, an ostrich, a turtle, an elephant, a scorpion, two vampires, a pokemon, your mom, Stephen Hawkings, a bird, a plane, mario, your family, and a plumber walk into a bar. They have cancer, AIDS, disabilties, diabetes, herpes, siezures, retardation, death in their families, drug addiction, no arms or legs, no home, no money, racial segregation, and have been raped. A combination of which is worse than the holocaust and three bee stings and a rope that fails.

thumb_up thumb_down -8

What's worse than an hours detention? Gettind raped by a horse anally.

thumb_up thumb_down +4

A guy walks up to a girl and says: " hey can I have your number so i can text you later?" she says " no" he says " why ?" she says" guess" He says " look if you don't like me thats okay, " he gets up and walks away, turns out she doesn't have a cell phone, she was gonna give him her house number to call.

thumb_up thumb_down -31

What do u get when u lick chicken Answer- Your a retard if you did not figure it out it is obviously chicken taste DERP!

thumb_up thumb_down -32

How do you know if there is a monster under your bed? Monsters are mythical creatures that, even if they were real, would be unlikely to sleep under a child-sized bed.

thumb_up thumb_down -28

Knock knock? Who's there? Alzheimer's, Alzheimer's who? Knock knock? Who's there? Alzheimer's, Alzheimer's who? Knock knock? Who's there? Alzheimer's, Alzheimer's who? Knock knock? Who's there? Alzheimer's, Alzheimer's who?

thumb_up thumb_down +27

Roses are red, Violets are blue, Wanna buy some meth.

thumb_up thumb_down +18

How do you get an Orphan's hands to bleed? Tell them to clap till daddy gets home.

thumb_up thumb_down +16

A horse walks into a bar. The bartender asks "Why the long face?". The horse does not respond because it is a horse. It can neither speak nor understand English. It is confused by its surroundings and gallops out of the bar, knocking over a few tables.

thumb_up thumb_down -12

Why did the chick cross the road? He didn't. He was attending his father's funeral, who had been killed earlier that week by an oncoming car as he was crossing the road.

thumb_up thumb_down -23

What's as red as a Lobster? A Lobster

thumb_up thumb_down +17

Why did the chicken cross the road? He didn't. I cut off his leg.

thumb_up thumb_down +58

Roses are red Violets are blue I hate rhyming Penis

thumb_up thumb_down +16

Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? Because the monkey has a very weak cerrebellum.

thumb_up thumb_down -20

What looks and sounds just like a seagull ? A seagull.

thumb_up thumb_down +13

What do you call a bunch black people falling off a cliff? A mudslide! What do you call a bunch of white people falling off a cliff? An avalanch!

thumb_up thumb_down -1

whats the difference between a jew and a pizza? the pizza doesn't scream when it goes in the oven.

thumb_up thumb_down +970

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops