A man walked into a bar. He needed 5 stitches.

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What do you call a nun who is just walking around? A Roman Catholic

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What did the black fire-fighter do when the house caught fire? The heroic man ran inside and got every animal and person inside to the out side and then proceeded to extinguish the flames with his fire-extinguisher out, thus saving most of the families valuables. He was then awarded a raise in his salary for his heroic valor. Although any fire-fighter could have done this because of the hard work and dedication that is put into training. So really describing the race that this heroic man is was totally pointless.

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How you know when dislextic

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A man walks into an exam room for a doctor's appointment. The doctor proceeds to perform the usual examinations, before asking the man to turn his head and cough. As is standard, he feels the man's testicles to check for irregularities. The man jokes, "Say doc, couldn't you at least ask me to dinner first?" The doctor replies, "You have testicular cancer." He died a month later.

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What did the pirate say to the ninja? I have aids.

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A man walks into a bar, then he realized he didn't have any money, so he walked out.

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Q: What happened when the rich man got married? A:His wife stole everything he had and left him a cold and broken man.

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An eggo waffle had three friends that he will be inviting to his Superman birthday party. WHich friend will get the first piece of cake? Nobody the party was canceled.

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What's better then a bad anti joke? A Good anti joke.

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What do you call a black man flying an airplane? A Pilot

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Did you hear about the eskimo and the pregnant lady? The eskimo got the pregnant lady pregnant.

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Q: What did the dog say to the owner when he took him to the vet? A: Nothing. It's a dog. It can't talk.

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Q: what do you call a black guy on the moon A: An astronaut you resist bastard

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Why did the chicken cross the road? It didn't. It was hit by a car.

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why was the tolit stoped up. because it had phoo

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A panda bear walks into a bar. The bartender then alerts the zoo of the whereabouts of their missing panda.

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Knock knock Who's there The mailman The mailman who? You are so dumb.

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Why is my son so unhappy? Because I beat his mother violently in front of him

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What did the cat say to the chicken? Meow

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How long did it take the world's most powerful democracy to elect a black President? Less than a day.

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What do you call a black guy selling drugs? A pharmacist

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Heartlight

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Who didn't allow the gorilla into the ballet studio? Whoever was in charge.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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