Someone told me once, but i had terrible memory so I had them tell me again.

Nick Demarco got butt due to the high number of females in his apartment

A Hispanic walks into an alleyway and sees two of his rich friends. He desperately needs money and only has enough time to shoot one of them because he sees the police following him. He decides which one to shoot... Wait, if he has enough time to think about this shouldn't he just shoot both of them?

Why are lawers are so scared of Jerry bryant? Because he bites

A hispanic priest with a huge boner walks into a bar.

Friend: "Hey man! Did you hear about the kid who bought the last hamster at the pet shop? Other friend: "No..." Friend: "Oh, well he shot himself last night."

What does an elephant and a grape have in common? One of them is purple.

Why doesn't it rain on Sundays? It does.

Dear emma brown i would appreciate if i could have my dick back, the you squeezed of wwith you ass cheeck -jackson edwards

mike:what did the boy with no arms and legs get for christmas tom:cancer ahahahaha mike:he got a skateboard jerk nararrator: this skate board will be worth less because he has no legs

Well, as you know, I have alzheimers and... ... ... ... ... ... Well, as you know, I have alzheimers.

Yo mama so fat that when she goes to the movies she sits next to everybody.

Knock, knock Who's there? It's me Me who? Just open your damn door funny guy it's freezing out here I don't get it

its all shi.ts and giggles.... ......until someone giggles and s.hits

What do you call a not as grumpy Jewish man in his mid 30s? Danny. What do you call 5 of his best friends? Arin, Suzy, Barry, Ninja Brian, And Ross. Another possible answer to the 1st question is currently not married.

What do you call an asian plumber? A plumber.

Whats big black and hairy? A large black dog.

What do you call an apple in a washing machine? My lunch!

What's dried up and smells like potatoes? Potato ships and school french fries.

What do you call a fat man that breaks into your house at 2 a.m. and steals your money and your television? Probably a dumbass, a jackass, a moron, an idiot, or something in that general area.

im black

What do you a call a guy on steroids? A Body Builder

...Jack Vale

How did Jesus walk on water? He was Jesus

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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