an irishman gets on facebook...he has 7 friend request

thumb_up thumb_down -21

What's a pirate's favorite video game? Pirates lived in a time before such technology existed

thumb_up thumb_down

Michael J Fox may not be able to draw a perfect circle but he sure can jerk off like a champ

thumb_up thumb_down +13

If 1+1=2, then you must have passed first grade arithmetic.

thumb_up thumb_down -14

How do you get Doctor Phil in a bikini? Give him a little alcohol to ease inhibitions and offer him a suitable bribe.

thumb_up thumb_down -23

What's purple, smells like an eggplant, and looks like an eggplant? An eggplant.

thumb_up thumb_down -20

I like vagina, hahahahah!!!!!!!!!!

thumb_up thumb_down -18

why is your mother dead? because i killed him.

thumb_up thumb_down -3

What did the black cat say to the tabby cat?? Meow

thumb_up thumb_down +13

Why'd the monkey fall out of the tree? it was dead Why'd the second monkey fall out of the tree? it was stapled to the first monkey Why'd the third monkey fall out of the tree? peer pressure Why'd the fourth monkey fall out of the tree? his girlfriend broke up with him so he commited suicide Why'd the fifth monkey fall out of the tree? cuz it was a dumbass

thumb_up thumb_down +17

Why wasn't the boy at his basketball game? - Because he, his twin brother, and pregnant mother all died in a fatal car accident involving a train on the way their.

thumb_up thumb_down +12

I like my women like I like my coffee, I don't like coffee.

thumb_up thumb_down -22

What did the Asian say to the American? herro. rook at me. i have round eye i american!

thumb_up thumb_down -10

What is a cow's favorite place to go? The slaughterhouse.

thumb_up thumb_down +19

this kid named terry was sitting in computer class then he got punched in the face

thumb_up thumb_down -13

What did George Washington say to his men before they crossed the Delaware? Get in the boat.

thumb_up thumb_down +12

How many jews can you fit in a car? That depends on the volume of the car and the size of the people involved - different cars are of different sizes and can fit a different number of people. For instance, you could probably fit more than 20 midget jews in a van but you could probably not fit as many overweight jews in a coupé. However if you put some effort into getting as many standard sized people, in this case jews for reasons unknown, into a standard size sedan you should be able to fit about seven or eight in the car itself and one in the trunk, making a total of nine or ten.

thumb_up thumb_down +37

69

thumb_up thumb_down +34

A frog and a toad eat a pie and then realize it is weird and then die.

thumb_up thumb_down +22

What's the difference between a baby and an onion? I cry when I chop up an onion.

thumb_up thumb_down -12

What did the man do with the naked baby girl? He put some clothes on her and proceded to lay her down for a nap.

thumb_up thumb_down -1

What would a gay, transgender, mexican man say to another? We could have butt sex.

thumb_up thumb_down +16

Whats worse than The Holocaust? Finding a worm in your apple.

thumb_up thumb_down +32

girl: why do you love me? boy: i don't.

thumb_up thumb_down +23

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops