Why did the chicken cross the road? Because the chicken saw some potential food across the street.

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Q: which of the following is a prime number? A: 17

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A farmer accidentally trips his wife. She falls down the stairs and the farmer is quickly arrested for murder.

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What's the difference between Jesus and a painting? It only takes one nail to hang up a painting.

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An Irishman, a German, a Jew, and a Mexican walk into a bar...... the Irishman is named designated driver and all four have a safe and enjoyable evening.

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How do you say a bad word in your language? Like this: "A bad word in your language"

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What's twelve inches long and makes women scream? Crib death.

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this girl and guy were sitting on my couch turns out its my sister and her boyfriend and she just farted

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A man walked into a bar. He stayed for a bit and had a good time.

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Did you hear about the blonde who jumped out off a bridge? She was clinically depressed and took her own life because of her terribly low self-esteem.

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Three blokes walk into a pub. One of them is a little bit stupid, and the whole scene unfolds with a tedious inevitability.

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How many lesbians does it take to change a light bulb? One, unless she's too short, in which case she may get someone else to do it for her.

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What did the catholic priest say at the AA meeting? Alcohol is ruining my life.

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Your mama's so skinny; she can fit into most swimsuits sizes 4-6 and has a rather petite bottom.

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What do you call a blond in a library? A girl that likes to read.

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What do you call a white guy surrounded by 5 black guys? A family friend paying a visit.

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A man gets home from work late at night and his wife is already asleep. Then he remembers that he forgot some important papers and has to drive back to work to get them.

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How many Jews can you fit in a car? Comfortably, four.

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There was a blonde, brunette and a red head on an island. The blond was on holiday, the brunette lived there and the red head was there on business, it was a very large and industrial island.

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What does a turtle do on its back? NOTHING!

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A dog walks into a bar and is promptly escorted out as animals are not allowed.

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So a cat walks into a bar and orders a bowl of milk. The bartender, realizing that cats cannot talk nor do they posses higher brain functions, realizes he must be dreaming.

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what do you call a man with no penis? what ever his name is

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Why did the long term smoker suddenly stop smoking? Because he had a heart attack.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops