two guys walk into a bar. the third guy ducks

thumb_up thumb_down +26

What do you call a person without any arm no legs and a eye patch? names

thumb_up thumb_down +2

PSP its a nut you can play... Outside...

thumb_up thumb_down -12

What's worse than hitting your thumb with a hammer? Getting your spine ripped off

thumb_up thumb_down -9

Why do black people like fried chicken? Well you see....

thumb_up thumb_down -8

What do you call a nun who is just walking around? A Roman Catholic

thumb_up thumb_down -6

A black man and a Mexican are in a car. Who's driving? The cop. The two men were best friends who had taken off from their law firm. Alex had recently gone through a divorce and John decided to take him on a trip backpacking across Europe. One rainy night an off-duty police officer picked them up and took them out for drinks. The friends had a wonderful trip. But Alex never got over Jenny leaving him. 3 months later John found him dead in his home by auto-erotic asphyxiation.

thumb_up thumb_down -25

Knock Knock! Who's there? Dog Dog wh- wait how did you knock? *mindblown*

thumb_up thumb_down -27

A blind man walks into a bar and orders a beer. He has gotten used to being blind all his life.

thumb_up thumb_down -12

Why should you never trust anglers? Because they're always into fishy business... Why should you never trust hunters? Because they carry loaded guns...

thumb_up thumb_down +41

How did the chicken get to the other side? He didnt, he got ran over.

thumb_up thumb_down +24

Knock Knock Who's there? Mormens...

thumb_up thumb_down -12

I wanted to burn alot of calories so i found a fat kid and set him on fire. :3

thumb_up thumb_down +16

Why did the chicken cross the road? It felt like it.

thumb_up thumb_down +6

How many babiess it take to paint a house? Depends on how hard you throw them.

thumb_up thumb_down -3

Knock Knock. Who's there? I don't know.

thumb_up thumb_down -24

Why does Waldo wear stripes? Because Martin Handford drew him that way to make him unique and distinguishablefrom the hundreds of other drawn people (and animals) in the pages of the children's game book, which incidentally is known as Where's Wally in numerous non-USA countries.

thumb_up thumb_down -4

What's the capital of Thailand? The letter 'T'...

thumb_up thumb_down -19

What did the farmer say when he lost his tractor? Where's my tractor?

thumb_up thumb_down -20

What did the deaf, dumb, blind, black kid get for Christmas? Modern Warfare 3.

thumb_up thumb_down +20

Why did the boy want to sleep in the same bed as his parents? His bedroom was on fire.

thumb_up thumb_down +1

A man walked into a bar making it immediately apparent that he had no future in competitive limbo.

thumb_up thumb_down

Why did the man have an erection? He had just masturbated.

thumb_up thumb_down +11

"I love you terribly!" said the girl to her new boyfriend "I know. You need to quit gnawing when you're giving me a blow job."

thumb_up thumb_down +12

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops