why did simran go to jessicas house? To go have a human taco

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What is the best part about football The scoring

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Bill: My brother died on 9/11 Steve: Oh, I'm so sorry to hear that. Was he in one of the towers? Bill: Both. Steve: Both? Bill: He was in one tower when the first plane hit, so he ran over to warn everybody in the other tower and while he was in the other tower, he died of AIDS. Steve: LOL Bill: Quit your laughing, Steve, and make sweet, sweet love to me! Steve: It would be my pleasure! (While Bill and Steve made sweet, sweet love on that park bench, little did they know that a hundred miles away in a beautiful Los Angeles home, actor Jeff Goldblum was making himself a turkey sandwich...not too much mayo...just the way he likes it.)

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Yo momma so fat she went on the Subway diet and is now exercising regularly to lose weight.

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how many Ethiopians can you fit in a bathtub? all of them.

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Why did the bunny cross the road? Because it waited until a car was driving by and then got run over.

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When life gives you lemons... Be thankful you're not starving, a**hole.

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whats the difference between jimmy saville and a horse? jimmy has a bigger cock

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What's worse than having you're leg fall asleep? Getting Polio

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Adam and Eve ate the apple and felt a bit ashamed and stuff. God looked upon them and said, well its just a fucking apple get outta here you kids! Adam and Eve also took things a bit too literal

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Why did the blond woman throw a clock out the window? She was going through a bitter divorce, and didn't want her ex-husband's things in her house anymore.

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What do you call a black man on the moon? An astronaut.

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How do you get 100 babies into a bucket? A blender. How do you get them out? Tortilla chips.

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Yo mama so ugly, she has to work harder than most women to attract men.

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What's the difference between getting hit by a car and being struck by lightning? Impossible to tell, they are 2 entirely different circumstances with limited certainties.

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Whats green has four legs and would kill you if it fell from a tree. Pool Table.....

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Nero, sure you are okay?

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Why didn't the Orphan finish his lemonade. His legs got chopped off.

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What happened when a myriad people decided to partake in a large party while staying in a small room? They managed to make a compromise. The party got split into two groups: 50% of the original total in each casual confinement. In the end, everybody had a great time and nobody got hurt.

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If the Trojan Horse was a deadly deception, is it My Lethal Phony?

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A black man walked into a bar. Had a drink, and left.

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How many Stephen Hawkings does it take to screw in a lightbulb? He can't.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because he was walking.

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The doctor said to the boy that a spoon full of sugar helps the medicine go down. He is diabetic.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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