What did the man with five penises say? I have 5 penises.

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Pigs have the emotional capacity of a five year old think about that next time you have to dissect one in biology

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What can little Billy play? The tumour, sorry I meant what will little Billy die from.

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Why didn't Rebecca Black take the bus? Because she would have had a heart attack with all of the seat choices.

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An American almost walks into a store when he sees a Jew. The Jew was also about to walk into the store, So the american opens the door for him and says"Jew first."

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Susan went to Chemistry class, Susan is no more. For what she thought was H20 was H2S04 (sulfuric acid.)

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What's the difference between a pile of dead babies and a tree There isn't a tree in my garage

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Don't make my new Nazi friend upset, or he'll be Fuhrerious

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Q: What's the difference between Catholism and Judiasm? A: There are many substantial and vital distinctions between Judaism and Christianity. Of course, there are many similarities as well, primarily because Christianity emerged from Judaism. However, the emergence was not a direct line. Christianity broke from Judaism, forming a new religion, so it is misleading, however comfortable the thought might be, to believe that the two religions are essentially the same, or to see Christianity as the natural continuation of Judaism.

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Why doesn't a ducks quack echo? Actually, it does, but the echo is imperceptible to human ears.

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How do you find dennis ferguson? Look at danyons bckground

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jumping jelly beans theirs a snake in my booties,, ooooooo har har ya ya youve got that one thing baby peace love and applesauce baby!!!!1

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A man is about to rape a girl. Before penetration he carefully and correctly applies a condom as he practices safe sex and is not yet ready to father a child.

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What does the orphan say to its parents? nothing, orphans dont have parents

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Why did the prince kiss his beloved just before going into battle? Intermission.

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HEY YOU! TISSUE!

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Q. What is worse than having 100 dead babies nailed to a tree? A. Having 100 dead trees nailed to a baby.

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What did the bicycle say to the fat kid? Nothing, bikes cant talk.

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Why was 6 afraid of 7? It wasn't; numbers cannot experience emotions.

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What's red and bad for your teeth? A brick.

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How do you steal candy from a baby? You ask nicely.

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reggin... its N I GG E R backwards

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Why did Lindsay Lohan talk to her car? Because she's insane

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Your mum is so dead, when I kick her she doesn't move.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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