A paralyzed guy walks into a bar... Oh wait, he can't.

thumb_up thumb_down +1

Why did the man run over Suzy? He was a serial killer

thumb_up thumb_down -18

Grandpa loved a good joke, he died laughing. The doctor said it was a severe stroke probably brought on by smoking aggravated by high cholesterol and high blood pressure.

thumb_up thumb_down -31

What is better than AIDS? Cancer.Cancer and more cancer

thumb_up thumb_down -21

Waseem is not a funny guy!

thumb_up thumb_down +31

What did one fat chick say to the other fat chick? Who cares, they're fat.

thumb_up thumb_down +15

Ask me if im a tree. Are you a tree? No

thumb_up thumb_down -9

What did the kid with no arms or legs get for Christmas? Cancer.

thumb_up thumb_down +6

Why was the globe sad? Because it was cut in half.

thumb_up thumb_down -12

What's wrong with a black man in a bar? Nothing, Except the fact that he is an alcoholic, and will probably beat his wife after drinking.

thumb_up thumb_down -21

your mamas so fat when she puts on a belt she has to use a bomarang to get it around her.

thumb_up thumb_down +1

Why was the elderly, Asian, blond pulled over by the officer? She was, and has been completely blind since birth.

thumb_up thumb_down +6

What's the difference between a Jew and a Generator? One powers your house...and then there's the generator.

thumb_up thumb_down +39

What did the rabbi say to the priest? I respect your religion but have faith in judiasm.

thumb_up thumb_down -11

What falls down but never gets hurt? A professional stuntman wearing protective gear.

thumb_up thumb_down -1

Stop being racist!Be a panda. They are black white and asian!!!!

thumb_up thumb_down +27

What's black and breaks your stove when falling from a tree? Your stove

thumb_up thumb_down -4

knock knock , who is there the postman the postman who ? the postman who is gonna give you a bill !

thumb_up thumb_down -8

Arrow to the Knee

thumb_up thumb_down +35

Why is it bees travel in formation, one side is longer than the other? ... There are more bees on one side

thumb_up thumb_down +15

Why did the boy cry when he got a new puppy? Because he had anal seepage coming out his ass

thumb_up thumb_down -1

Person 1- your face is a stupid joke Person 2- you're right, because it's not a joke its a face

thumb_up thumb_down +38

To mamma so fat..............nuff said

thumb_up thumb_down -60

Why did John forget his homework? While driving herself home at 8:00 PM the previous evening, his mother got into a terrible automobile accident. She was rushed to the emergency room, only to find out that one of her main arteries in her right arm was cut. Death was probable for her in the next few hours. John and his father, sitting at home playing a friendly game of chess, were notified of the accident by hospital secretaries. His father rushed John with him to the hospital in his Toyota Camry. Upon arrival, they were notified that John's mother had only a few moments left to live. They ran into her room, and said their last parting words. John's were "I love you, Mom.", and her husband's were "I love you, honey." She then passed away. John began to weep, and his father put his arm around him to try to comfort him, while feeling extreme sadness as well. Around this time, back at home, his dog, Rex, ate his homework that he left on the dining room table. John and his dad then drove back home, crying their eyes out. This kind of sadness they have never experienced before. He will always remember his mom, and love her to bits. His dad, well, he was never really the same after her death. The funeral was scheduled for the next week. John will always remember his mom as being a nice, caring individual with so much love for everyone in the world. Him and his dad later picked out a nice, blue coffin that reads "You will always be missed" on the top of it. They chose it because John's mom's favorite color was blue.

thumb_up thumb_down +10

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops