what is worse finding a worm in your apple? Finding a grub in your apple.

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Justin Bieber

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? It was dead.

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Why did the robber wear a mask? Because he had eczema.

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Why should you never shower with a pokemon? Pokemon is a game for children. In doing so you would greatly disturb your child who is quite fond of pokemon

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If John has 50 candybars and eats 45 of them how many does he have left? Diabetes.

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What happened when barba opened the coca cola? The cap flew off and hit the fence then the train then the moon then the pillow then the sun then the pole and the pole fell and hit the baseball and the cap landed on the floor... Then my turtle died

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Joe Biden

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Q.) What do you call a black man on the moon? A.) An astronaut.

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Why couldn't the chicken cross the road? There was no cross walk.

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What is the difference between a watermelon and a baby? One you can smash with a hammer and the other is just a watermelon.

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man: im hungry can i have a sandwich wife: go make one man: then what are you gonna do

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Why did Sarah fall off the swing? She didn't have any arms. Knock knock. Who's there? Not Sarah.

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When life gives you lemons, take them. Free stuff is cool.

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What did the hooker say to the black guy? How long do you want it for?

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Whats worse than spilling the milk? Getting raped by the easter bunny.

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Why didn't the young child commiserate the death of his grandparents after they were simultaneously crippled by a tremendous avalanche whilst skiing? He didn't exist.

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What do you call a black person riding a bicycle? A black person riding a bicycle.

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A man builds a time machine but can only travel back in time. Where does he go? Irrelevant. Time and space exist on different planes.

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Q: Whats Red And Has Socks? A: An Apple, I Lied About The Socks..

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, Hello Carolina, let me lick your vagina.

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Where did the girl go when a bomb was dropped on her? Everywhere

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Knock Knock! Who's there? John.

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Why did the drunk man puke? Because he was drunk.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops