What do you call a black man that steals a VCR? My Grandpa, he was a Vietnam vet

thumb_up thumb_down -10

Why did the chicken cross the road? The question just posed is unanswerable, as in order to state the reasoning for the chicken crossing the road, one would have to assume the a chicken has a concept of 'road'. As the chicken is an avant, we can safely say that it has no need of pavements/ sidewalks or roads. As a result, it cannot possibly have an incentive for doing so. Consider the following hypothetical analogy: you are walking in a forest, and you unknowingly cross another animals scent trail. You cannot possibly say WHY you walked across the scent trail, as you didn't know it was there. You can state your reasoning for walking in the first place, but not for crossing that specific scent trail. In conclusion, this question is unanswerable, due to the chicken's lack of knowledge about roads.

thumb_up thumb_down -13

I like my sex how i like my steak Pink and Bloody

thumb_up thumb_down -8

What did the man with no arms or legs get for Christmas? A bike

thumb_up thumb_down -7

How can you tell the difference between a cow? One says moo

thumb_up thumb_down +39

Q: What's the difference between a bird and a fly? A: A bird can fly, but a fly can't bird.

thumb_up thumb_down -23

What did the Ethiopian eat for dinner? Nothing

thumb_up thumb_down +47

What do you call a dog with 4 legs? A dog.

thumb_up thumb_down -13

52 Prostitutes in a bar. Challenge Accepted.

thumb_up thumb_down +12

Lol... (wow you made me type lol), "like it is nothing to be ashamed of?" Your eyes are really beautiful, honestly probably the most beautiful eyes I have seen... And no, I am not talking about your bewbs.

thumb_up thumb_down -10

Whats white and sticky? Rotten milk.

thumb_up thumb_down +11

How many Alzheimer's patients does it take to screw in a lightbulb? To get to the other side!

thumb_up thumb_down +4,134

A devout Islamic man walks into a weapons of mass destruction store he is shocked and appalled at how easily such dangerous weapons can be bought.

thumb_up thumb_down -7

Why shouldn't you hit a black guy on a bike? Because you would get charged with vehicular manslaughter and have the NAACP all up in your ass.

thumb_up thumb_down -12

whats worse than 2 jews 3 jews

thumb_up thumb_down -6

5 people are walking

thumb_up thumb_down +17

What's the difference between a banana and a monkey? They're both yellow, except the monkey

thumb_up thumb_down +9

Jack and Jill went up the hill, to fetch a pail of water. Jack fell down and broke his crown, and Jill came tumbling after. Up Jack got, and home did trot, as fast as he could caper, to old Dame Dob, who proceeded to get Jill convicted of attempted murder, as well as several millions of dollars for pain and suffering.

thumb_up thumb_down -25

Why were the Jews stuck in Germany? Because Joseph Rosenstein and his Jewish family missed their train out of Frankfurt to go to Paris, and so they had to stay another night in their hotel.

thumb_up thumb_down -3

What time is it? If I hadn't poked your eyes out, you might know.

thumb_up thumb_down +11

You are walking down the street. You see 3 black people and you don't talk to them because they are complete strangers.

thumb_up thumb_down +3

Why doesn't Julius Caesar answer his cell phone? Because he's DEAD.

thumb_up thumb_down +9

what is black and white and red all over a shot to death zebra

thumb_up thumb_down +25

Brian: farts RJ: Who farted? Brian: Idk Why? Rj: Smells like sweet ass back here

thumb_up thumb_down +4

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops