What's white and looks like paper? Paper.

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Whats big and blue and white and if it falls from a tree its sure to kill you. A fridge with a denim jacket on.

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A man walks into a bar............. The bar explodes and everyone dies

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You ask your friend if they want to hear a joke when they say yes tell them that thought you had a joke

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2 persons in an elevator then, one guy says: dude! smells like your sister! and the other guy is not there

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So a man was walking down the street with bananas in his ears when he saw one of his friends coming the other way. When they met up the one friend asked, "Hey you know you've got bananas in your ears?" To which the man replied "What? I can't hear you, I have bananas in my ears."

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Fine, just remember that I want to help you, but you cannot ask me for help, and then throw a shitstorm of accusations at me, I have never worked for the feds and never will, I know nothing about their code of operations nor... Anything really. Let me give you an advice, I know that at least two people you trusted deeply betrayed you, but if you are not going to trust anyone again, then leave point zero while you still can do so alive. And no babe, this is not a threat, its advice.

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Whats worse than being raped? Being raped and murdered.

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What did the boy with no arms and no legs get for Christmas? I don't know. He couldn't open it.

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why did the boy drop her ice cream? -he got hit by a bus

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A black man, a jew and a muslim walk into a bar. ... I forgot what happens next, so let's just say they have a good time and get back home safely.

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What do you call a poldo thats hafl poldo a

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What do you call 10,000 lawers jumping out of a plane? A good start.

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What sinks quickly to the bottom of a river? Your dead parents.

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Did you hear the one about the guy who went his whole life without ever telling a joke? He was still funnier than David Letterman.

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Doctor Doctor! I think im turning into a carrot! Thats a side effect of the drugs Alice, We've just had your test results back. I'm sorry Alice, You've got HIV.

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make me a sandwich! what kind?

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Q:If quizes are, "guizicles," then what are tests? A:Who calls quizes, "quizicles?"

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Biggest lie in America: Sorry, that was my last stick of gum.

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What does A.D.D stand for? Attention deficit disorder

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Q:what has four legs, is green and fuzzy, and if it falls out of a tree it will kill you? A:a pool table

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what do you call a man who is addicted to alcohol... an alcoholic

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What do you call a person who uses food stamps? Poor. What do you call a black person who uses food stamps? Still poor.

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Your momma's so ugly, she has endure self-esteem issues relating to her appearance that have plagued her since grade school.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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