What did the orphan get for Christmas? Nothing, the orphanage did not have sufficient funds to give everyone a present because they did not want to how favoritism because the orphans are already sad enough and te orphanage does not want the orphans killing them selves

why did the chicken cross the road? To get away from the sadistic farmer with a loaded shotgun (as the farmer has an extremely large score to settle with the chicken, as his wife was dead, a cause of mad cow disease, an STD from the chicken, as the chicken is a pimp) thus escaping captivity and starting a new life as a free chicken. God save Martin Luther KIng

A white police officer pulled over a black guy on the highway. The cop asked him for license and registration. The black guy had a tail light out, and was very polite and cooperative. The two became close friends, but then one night, the black guy went to the house of the white cop. The black guy brought his wife and daughter over for a dinner party, eating grilled turkey sandwiches with mayonnaise. When the cop's attractive wife asked the black guy if he would like some fresh watermelon from the patch in their back yard, he respectfully declined, for he needed to return to his own home to patiently wait for a business call from one of his employees, who was also a very intelligent and hard working African male. Once home, the black guy turned on his stereo, to listen to some calming country music at an appropriately low level of volume, as his daughter and wife had gone to sleep, for the wife also had work in the morning, at her law firm, and her daughter had a job interview after her day of classes at Dartmouth were out for the day... then Martin Luther King Jr. woke up from his dream, and was soon thereafter assassinated.

Whats brown, sweet, and bad for your teeth? A brick.

A: thats what your mom said last night! B: my mom committed suicide when i was three because she could not handle the stress of being a teen mother with an abusive boyfriend. A: oh... B: yeah....

koala's try to hit on teddy bears...... desperate even though we know extinction's comin

Why couldn't Hellen Keller drive? Because she is blind and is a women, who are notoriously bad drivers.

Why is my penis 2 inch hard? Because I rape little boys with it and there tight little asshole are crushing it

A chicken walks into a bar and orders a beer. Just kidding chickens cant talk and animal control was called

Why did Michael Jackson become white? He thought he saw a ghost.

What's a pirate's favorite letter? R, but they are also fond of the C.

Why did the penis cross the road? To get to the other vagina.

What do gay guys eat? Normal food like every other human being.

Did you hear about the red ship and the blue ship that collided? Everyone on board died.

Sure, I was not born yesterday, sounds serious, what is it?

The asian boy only did an hour of study....... nothing was heard of him after his mum found out

So I was sitting in the doctor's when I noticed a guy sitting about two seats down, wearing a sombrero and pouring salt over himself. Then I found out I had cancer and promptly lost all interest in him.

Magic Johnson has AIDS

What is black and bad for your teeth? A cannon ball

What's worse than stubbing your toe? - AIDS. What's worse than AIDS? - Getting AIDS and stubbing your toe.

How do you jump off a bridge? You jump

What do you call an arab flying a plane? A pliot

What is the same about a bird and a turtle? They can both fly . . . except for the turtle

What's black, white, and red all over? A: Me after domestic abuse.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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