Why did Obama cross the road? Oh, wait, he didn't make it.

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Our societal waste doesn't deserve to be called a group. They fail to organize themselves and lack the intelligence to support themselves. Let's call them a collective. Similar to dust, or smarter than them, bacteria.

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Why do men find it difficult to make eye contact? Some men are blind.

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What is blue and has wheels? A disabled Smurf!

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How did the black guy, get a nice car, house, and attire? He went to college, and got a job.

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Why did the man shoot up the movie theater? Because he spent his whole child hood playing Call of Duty Black Ops II, Left 4 Dead 2, and Minesweeper. And video games, are the only thing that would rive someone to shoot up a movie theater.

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What do you tell someone who says they are contemplating suicide? where to find some cheap cyanide

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What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? The Holocaust.

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Bob was in trouble. He forgot his wedding anniversary. His wife was really pissed. She told him "Tomorrow morning, I expect to find a gift in the driveway that goes from 0 to 200 in 6 seconds AND IT BETTER BE THERE !!" The next morning he got up early and left for work. When his wife woke up, she looked out the window and sure enough it was car. The End

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Jupiter is the Galaxys biggest planet!

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An Irishman walks out of a bar.

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Whats green and has wheels? Grass, I lied about the wheels.

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A Scotsman, an Englishman and an Irishman walk into a bar and the barman asks "Is this some kind of a joke?"

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What is the biggest lie in the entire universe? " I have read and agree to the Terms of Service"

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Why did the chicken cross the road? To make it home in time for Thanksgiving.

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Two blondes and a brunnett walk into a bar. Remarkably, there was nothing else notable about any of them.

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there was a guy who had 2 horses... he entered them into races... they were rubbish... kept losing... so he entered them in 1 big race and said hed get rid of the loser... the horses made a plan to finish it at exactly same time... he heard them talking and said HOW DARE TALK

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Why did the boy drop his ice cream? Because he was hit by a bus.

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If life throws you lemons, you might be dislexic

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What did the boy with no arms and no legs get for Christmas? Cancer.

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what did Harold Camping say to the little girl and boy? "You and your parents are going to die today"

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Why was the boy sad? He had a frog stapled to his face.

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Roses are red, Violets are blue. I have a gun. Get in the van.

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Whats black white and red all over? A decapitated panda.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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