What do you call an Englishman, an Irishman and a Chineseman playing football? 3 friends playing their favourite sport.

thumb_up thumb_down +13

Knock knock. Who's there? Banana. Banana who? Knock knock. Who's there? Banana. Banana who? Knock knock. Who's there? Banana. Banana who? Knock knock. Who's there? Orange. Orange who? I was eating an orange in the park last week when I saw four men brutally murdered before my very eyes.

thumb_up thumb_down -23

What did Goldilocks ask the Three Bears? Nothing, bears are aggressive mammals and killed her before she could speak.

thumb_up thumb_down +36

roses are red, violets are blue, dandelions are yellow, tulips are pink, sunflowers are black and yellow, my dick is 13 inches long.

thumb_up thumb_down -26

Yo mama's so fat, we are all extremely concerned for her health.

thumb_up thumb_down +144

Why did the chicken cross the road? Because it felt like it!!!

thumb_up thumb_down -31

How do you get a black guy down from your tree? You can't, because there aint any.

thumb_up thumb_down +3

Why was the dinosaur laughing so hard? He heard a very humorous joke

thumb_up thumb_down +2

why was six afraid of seven? Because seven brutally murdered six's family

thumb_up thumb_down -37

Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? Because the monkey was a dead. Don't you dare laugh. Asshole.

thumb_up thumb_down

How do you know that a woman is having an orgasm? They go like OH YAH OH YAH:D

thumb_up thumb_down +30

News of the day - David gives back 2 pounds to someone. The police, as he stole from a old nana to pay for a toothbrush

thumb_up thumb_down -8

what did the white man say to the mexican man when the mexican stepped in poop? you have poop on your toe

thumb_up thumb_down -9

Yo Mama is so white, people call her caucasian.

thumb_up thumb_down +14

What is Kanye West's favorite type of sea-food? Lobster Bisque with a side of french fries.

thumb_up thumb_down -10

G

thumb_up thumb_down +38

Yo mama's so fat she got baptized in Sea World.

thumb_up thumb_down +2

what do you tell a black man getting hit by a police baton? that is racial inequality, and you no longer have to take that due to Abraham Lincoln's Gettysburg Address.

thumb_up thumb_down -2

Why did a little boy have a black eye? Because his father is very abusive to him and his sister. They are beaten every dad after the father comes home drunk from the bar because his wife also the kids mother died in a car acciedent 1 month before this. Child abuse is not funny and neither is a dead mother.

thumb_up thumb_down -11

what do you get when you cross an elephant with a lake? swimming trunks.

thumb_up thumb_down -17

What did the three blind mice say to the priest? I'm blind :(

thumb_up thumb_down +14

What do Jews always complain & want money for? Anything

thumb_up thumb_down +25

What's worse then having gum stuck on the bottom of your shoe? Having a stick poked in your eye. What's worse then having a stick poked in your eye? Having a nail go through your foot. What's worse then having a nail go through your foot? Having a stick poked in your eye and a nail going through your foot.

thumb_up thumb_down +42

A kid wanted to change the channel... One thing leads to another.

thumb_up thumb_down -2

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops