Girl: That's pretty big. Boy: That's what she said. Woman: Yes, I enjoys large genitals.

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A penguin bikes to a bakery, the baker asks him "what kind of bread do you want?" Penguin replies "it doesn't matter, im biking"

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Hi! This is Ms.McGruder you two boys in my office at 3:00 p.m. today

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Q: What's gray and comes in gallons? A: Gray paint.

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What the difference between some stoned and someone drunk? When your drunk you think having a good time even when you not and when you stoned your so high you think your a dragon ball z character.

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Did you hear about the guy that had his entire left side cut off? He's all right now. Dead but all right.

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tim tebow is a great quarterback

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Why couldn't the pirate watch the violent movie? Because pirates died along time ago

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Fred: says hi Bob: says shut up why the hell do you have to be so rude!!! Fred:thankyou ob thats better

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What is worse than being unemployed? Terminal Cancer

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A Gamer walks into the tavern, the bartender says to him, "just dont act like you control the place!"

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Whats white? A fridge

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On a scale of 1 to Osama Bin Laden, how good is your hiding spot? Rhetorical question. Osama Bin Laden is dead now.

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Knock knock Whos there? A rapist. Go away I'm calling the police!! (The rapist then proceeds to break open the door, beat the woman repeatedly with a baseball bat, and then rapes her)

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Q: what did the emo girl use to check her email? A: A computer.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? It didn't, it got ran over by a car

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How do you scare a Jew Hold your lighter up and blow out the flame and I've toward him real slowly and see how much drama he'll cause

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equality for women

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What is the difference between a feminist and a gun? A gun only has one trigger

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Harry thrust his wand forward, "Expelliarmus!" Voldemort casually ducks, and fires a killing curse at our hero.

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so a guy walks into the bar...i forget the rest of the jokes but your mother is a whore.

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Yo mama so dumb she got hit by a bus and didn't know! The funeral was touching and sad. Everyone cried. 2 weeks later..........Johnson ended his own life.......

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When life gives you Lebanon, make lebanonanade.

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Once upon a time a homeless man was walking down the street. He stopped suddenly and realized he didn't know how to read. So he walked to the library to find someone to teach him. A woman was sitting at one of the tables so the homeless man walked up to her and asked, "Can you teach me how to read?" The woman stared at the homeless man for a few moments. Then she replied to him saying, "Not until you take a bath." Realizing that he smelled awful and that his face was covered in dirt he nodded towards the woman and left to go find a shower house. The homeless man came upon a hotel and asked the receptionist, "Excuse me sir, may I take a shower here?" The receptionist gave the man a long hard look and said, "Not until you find a better set of clothes." The homeless man looked at himself and saw that his clothes were quite old and worn out so he left the hotel to find a clothing store. He finds a clothing store and asks an employee, "Sir, may I have a new shirt, pants, socks, shoes and a pair of underwear?" The employee quickly said in reply, "Not until you pay for them." The homeless man remembered that he indeed was poor and didn't have a penny to his name. So then he walks out of the store to go find a job and make some money. He happens across a storage facility moving many heavy boxes. He walks up to the supervisor and asks, "Pardon me sir, do you need any help with moving these boxes? If you can pay me a few dollars I will help you." The supervisor said to him, "Sure, start moving them to that unit in the corner there. So the homeless man worked until dusk, made $55 dollars, went back to the clothes store, bought new clothes, waked back to the hotel and took a shower, and finally walked over to the library where the woman was still sitting and learned how to read. He walked out of the library feeling accomplished and full of pride. Unfortunately he wasn't paying attention to where he was walking. He slipped on the curb into traffic and was hit by a car, dying on impact.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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