Whats long hard and has seaman? A submarine!

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"Knock knock" "Who's there?!, who's there?!!!, ya fucking asshole!!!, and quit knockin on my door!, my windows are fine!"

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A girlfriend scolds her boyfriend for "sitting on anti-joke all day." He then explains how it is impossible to sit on something that exists purely in digital form and instead noted it would be more correct to say sitting at a desk all day. She complied and saw the error of her ways.

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what do women and men have in common? nothing, women are inferior

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You are so stupid you should go to school and get an education so you are able to get a well paying job in this tough economy

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what movie can a retarded 8 year old play the lead role in. Zathura

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What's worse than hitting your thumb with a hammer? Getting your spine ripped off

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What has one eye, three arms and one leg? A really weird person.

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whats white and lives in a tree a fridge

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Roses are red, violets are blue, I'm a skitsofrantic, and so am I

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Wanna hear a joke? Sure Niiiiggggeeee what is the last letterThe last letter is NOT and R! Its an R. Good job honey

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what did the leprosy survivor get for christmas a amputation

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Why did the woman go to the kitchen? The same reason she went to the bathroom, she needed to wash her hands because she was finger painting. Her husband was using the bathroom.

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What's the difference between a baby and a sandwich? A sandwich doesn't scream when I put my salami in it.

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How do you get Doctor Phil in a bikini? Give him a little alcohol to ease inhibitions and offer him a suitable bribe.

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A hairy monster walks into a bar. It was halloween.

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Bill: Did you hear someone said you sounded like an owl? Dave: Who?

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How do you start a fire in the woods? Call Cole Ryder!

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A man walks into a bar and says, "I'll take a drink."

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What's yellow, black, and makes you laugh? A bus full of black people going off a cliff.

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After tesco's horse burgers, what's next? My lidl pony

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RULES: #1) have fun #2) safety first

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I like jokes.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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