Q: What do you call a dad running down a hill? A: A mom running down a hill, I lied about the dad.

Why couldn't the woman give her sister a present? Because she just got eaten by zombies.

Why did the little girl fall off of the swing? She had previously been in a car accident, in which all of her close family died and she was the only survivor. Since both her arms were stuck in between crushed components of the car, they had to be amputated on the spot. She was testing out the prosthetic arms she had been given when they failed, causing her to get a concussion, and putting her in a coma for the rest of her life.

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Why was the homeless man begging for money? Because he needed money to buy liquer for his severe alcohol addiction that was slowly destroying his liver.

Why did the car get out of bed? Because the person who owned the car was a total freak and put the car into a bed.

Your moms so dumb she stuffed a battery up her butt and said i got the POWA!

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What did one hipster say to the other hipster? I'm not a hipster.

roses are red violets are blue i've got a boner and it raging for you

Patient: "So what seems to be the problem doc? Doctor: "I'm afraid you have AIDS. I'm sorry."

What do you not want to get when playing scrabble? Diarrhea

What happened when the man fell off the boat? He went into the water and was viciously mauled by 5 alligators then ran over by another boat.

An Asian girl is playing with a rubber band. She accidentally slings it into her eye, cries, and receives immediate attention from her mother.

What do you calk a dirty mexican? a hard working gardener

What is worse than the holocaust Nothing it was fine with the Jews in camps burning and dying

What was the babies first word? Nothing: It was a still-born.

Why did a man throw butter out the window ? So he could see butter fly and then realized that there was one on window cil

What's Brown and Sticky? A Stick

Roses are grey. Violets are grey. I am colorblind because Iam a dog.

That's illegal What? Your mom

roses are red violets are blue everyone is stupid how about you? -I'm not Im black

yo momma is so stupid she went and got her self checked for mental retardedness and it turns out she happens to be autistic.

So what happened after 911?? What do you think?

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

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The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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