Yo mamma's so fat, at her last annual checkup her attending physician informed her that if she did not attempt to control her weight gain through a careful moderation of her diet and began exercising on a regular basis, that her obesity would soon manifest itself in a variety of chronic health conditions that would permanently alter her ability to enjoy life and could significantly decrease her lifespan.

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What do you call a dog with no legs? It doesn't matter what you call him he isn't coming anyway!!!!

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Why did the toilet paper roll down the hill? ... To get to the bottom.

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How many Caucasian American males does it take to screw in a lightbulb? One.

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one bright morning in the middle of the night two dead boys got up to fight back to back they faced each other drew thier swords and shot each other a deff policeman heard this noise came and shot the two dead boys if you dont believe this lie is true ask the blind man he saw it too

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a white men said to another white men that someone robbed a bank, it was at night and he wasn't wearing a mask, and also the camera couldn't see him, they now found out that he was black.

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Your mom is so fat that she has to wear large clothing.

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A man decides to go hunting in the woods with a shotgun, he is going through the woods and a bear randomly pops out of no where, knocks him down and rapes him. So the next day he came back with an even bigger shotgun and said, "i am going to kill this bear" so he goes through the woods, the bear comes out of nowhere, knocks him down and rapes him again. So he comes back the next day with and even bigger shotgun and says, " i am going to kill this bear, skin it, and eat it" so hes going through the woods and out comes the bear, knocks him down, gets real close to his face and says, "you dont come out here for the hunting do ya".

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Okay, so your school has a fire drill, and a ginger asks why the alarm went off. You reply, “Some new kid saw your hair and pulled the fire alarm

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What's the difference between a park bench and a black man? The bench can support a family!

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What is green and if it fell on you from a tree it would kill you? A pool table.

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Why doesnt your dad like barrack Obama? because your dad is straight, hes not into men

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Yo momma so fat, the last time she saw 90210 was on the scale!

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what's the difference between a duck? You can't wash a window with a brick.

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What is my cats favorite college? Harvard

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A dinosaur is walking down the street. He is soon confronted by a human. The human says to the dinosaur, "Hey, your a dinosaur." Which the dinosaur replies with, "Yes, yes i am." The dinosaur then stands there for a few seconds wondering why he is in the same time period as the human. And as to why a dinosaur would talk.

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What happened to the fish? It drowned

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Why did the dog in Detroit die in the street? It was stabbed.

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What do you get when you hit a deer? A dead deer, which you should probably take home to eat - wouldn't want it to go to waste.

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why did the little old lady die? she was mugged then shot in the head 5 times.

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Why did the woman not wear a bra? Because she had breast cancer and got a double mastectomy.

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Q: What's pink and fuzzy? A: Pink Fuzz...

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Why was the farmer buried in a grave on the top of a hill? He had died and this would be his final resting place.

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Wanna hear an oxymoron? Jews for Jesus.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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