What did the sick kid say to Make a Wish foundation? To get better

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How do you kill a bunch of flies in one swat? Smack an African kid in the face.

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What's worse than breaking a leg? Breaking two legs.

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Q; Why to did the chef jump off of a cliff wearing an Elmo suit? A; Because he felt like it. It;s a free country

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Why did the man follow the law? He didn't want to get arrested

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I pooped.

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what do you call a black man living in Brooklyn making over ten-thousand dollars a week? a hard worker

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How many lesbians dose it take to finish a pizza? One or unless she invites some freinds over.

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Why did the surrealist go to the doctor? Knock Knock.

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Why was the crocodile depressed? It wasn't; given the primitive anatomy of the reptilian brain, modern biopsychoneurological evidence suggests that reptiles feel only basic emotions such as fear or anger.

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I'm Ryan Dunn, and this is a 120 mph car crash

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Where were guinea pigs created? Probably in Guinea Land or something.

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Why did the girl fall out of the swing? Because she had no arms. They were lost in a tractor accident.

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A basket full of puppies can do anything, except put out a fire.

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WHY DID THE MAN RUN A MILE?.BECAUSE HE WAS TRYING TO CATCH HIS NOSE AND GET A TISSUE

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what did the chicken say to the other chicken? nothing, they dont talk.

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Q #1: Why did Sally fall off the swings? A #1: She has no arms. Q #2: Knock Knock Who's There? Not Sally.

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I was in the 74th hunger games I hid in the cornucopia until almost everyone was dead. Then I saw Katniss and Peeta so while they were distracted with night lock I pulled a rubber chicken out of my ass and beat the shit out of them till they died then I won the 75th hunger game also. They asked me to be there mocking jay but I killed them all and blew the plane up in the Capitol the end. By Adam Chebali

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mary poppins' handbag is full of dick

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What do you call a person with 4 arms? A normal person. (fore arms) (meant to be audible)

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What did the tree say when it was cut down? Nothing, it's a tree

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If you work at Penn State you might want to skip the annual "bring your kid to work day"

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Roses Are Blue I Have A Gun And Ill Sout You!

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Ass

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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