What do you get when you cross a parrot and a beach ball? A beach ball with a parrot design on it.

What do you call a black man that works in a church A priest

Why did the chicken cross the road? Because the sidewalk he was on does not.

A man and Sasquatch are walking down the shoreline on the eastern coast, the man looks back at the foot prints in the sand, he notices that during the hardest parts of his life, there were only one pair of footprints, while in his easiest moments, he sees two pairs of footprints; the man is disturbed about this and he asks Sasquatch this. "Sasquatch, Although you have always promised to be with me in my life, I see that when I needed you most, you were never there. Why is this Sasquatch?" Sasquatch replies, "HREAAHAHG?!"

They see me trollin' They hatin'...

Why did the bear eat the asian? It was hungry

What's green, grows in my basement, and if fun to smoke? Mold. I lied about it being fun to smoke.

Ever heard of carpel tunnel? Well after that girl it was more like carpal toungal

Did you hear the one about the man who went into the jungle wearing nothing but leopard print underwear? He was suffering from psychogenic fugue disorder and had no idea who or where he was. He was eventually eaten alive by a flesh-eating centipede. When his wife found out, she committed suicide.

What are the two sexiest farm animals? Consider that we are humans we shouldn't find any sex appeal in animals but if i had to guess I would say Brown Chicka Brown Cow

Did you know that in the country of Nigeria, every minute, 60 second passes?

Why is 6 afraid of 7? Because 7 took 9 behind an alley and raped her.

Why was the baby crying? He had just witnessed his parent gets brutally murdered.

I was watching Fox news.

Whats worse than the Halocaust? Your mom

what did the dead guy say to the boy? nothing he is dead.

knock knock, whos there? your neighbor's cat..no not really, but your sister just got raped

What's worse than the Holocaust? Someone born in the 1970s feeling self-righteous about defending the victims.

What had 82 eyes, 7 mouths, and sings the blues? Nothing, the described creature does not exist.

You know that feeling you get when you see your crush walking towards you? No, I'm blind.

Do you want to hear a joke? No. Women's- oh, okay.

A paraplegic wheels himself into a bar. The barman asks, 'What can I get you?' 'Nothing,' replies the paraplegic, 'I've just pissed myself and I need you to help me clean myself up.'

What is green and would kill you if it fell out of a tree and onto your head? A pool table.

Q: What did the duck say to the bartender? A: Nothing considering that ducks cannot speak

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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