How do you make a fake baby cry -Put batteries in it. How do you make a real baby cry? -Put batteries in it.

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When making an Anti-Joke, you click the button that says: 'I have read and agree to the terms of service' What are you called? A Liar.

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Why did David go swimming? Pink sock.

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Roses are red Violets are blue I like peanut butter Can you fly?

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A dyslexic pimp buys a warehouse.

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Nohypocondrism: When you feel fine and everyone keeps telling you you are a sick bastard. Charisma: Hey, that guy that changed my life killed the neighbor, cool rite? I mean that damn neighbor did say nothing to me when I said hi. Solitude: When the room is so overcrowded that you feel small and alone. I think that people that are jack of all trades and master of none are stupid... I AM JACK OF NO TRADES AND MASTER OF ALL! I am nothing, because nothing lives on forever, nothing is unbreakable, nothing is really awesome on a terrible day... I am also Nobody, because Nobody has more money than me.. FUUUUUUUU..

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Jeff comes home from a long day at work. As a result he is very tired. So, he decides to go to bed.

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Cleveland winning something

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Q: How many babies does it take to paint a house. A: Depends on how hard you throw them.

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who farted? umm........that guy.

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what would abraham lincoln do if he were alive today? scream and try to open his coffin.

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ugh good riddance

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red is black green is black i'm batman i'm white,

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a korean guy robs a black guys convenient store!

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What's funnier than the holocaust? Just about everything seeing how the holocaust is not a funny event, but rather enormous tragedy.... Assholes.

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No, I had no idea, nor did I know that Nero means Black or Darkness until I searched it up some weeks ago. No, I would never photoshop anything, I mean sure I am the girl/woman thing with the big tits, but that`s like all I got going... Oh and yeah I use glasses sometimes because these contact lenses become itchy after a while and stuff.

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What do you call an asian woman with one leg? By her name.

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Do you know what the cop said to the black guy? Your free to go

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What do you call a discounted watercraft? It is traditional to use a female name.

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What do you call a gay drive by? a fruit rollup

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What's white, wet, and sticky? A tissue that I just blew my nose with.

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What's the difference between difference and between? One is different and the other between.

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Knock Knock Who's There? I am. I am who? I think someone has contracted amnesia.

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So two friends walk into a bar. One says to the bartender, "Get me a Miller Lite please." The bartender says, "Sure." The other friend says, "Get me a Cosmopolitan please." The bartender stares at him and says, "That is not the drink I was expecting you to order, but I respect your decision."

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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