Why is Ellen Degeneres gay? Because she likes the same sex

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roses are red, violets are not, this poem makes no sense. Bananas

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Why did the chicken cross the road? To get to the other side!

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Your mother is so fat she has to have her clothing specially ordered, this brought her to a massive credit card bill and made your entire family bankrupt.

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Why didnt jerry trip over a slug? Because jerry is an arabian and the atmosphere in arabi is to hot for a slug.

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Two Cows are knitting soda water in a lightbulb. One of them said: Talking about milk, what time is it? The other pulls out a thermometer, looked at it and said: Wednesday.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Well, there could be several reasons. The sight of another chicken, its wondering imagination, but because chickens cannot speak, therefore, can never know the true answer.

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Want to burn 3000 calories in under 5 MINUTES? Take a store bought pizza and put it in the over for as long as you want. Just watch the calories burn away in a puff of smoke!

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Me - Ask me if I am a Frog. You - Are you a Frog? Me - No.

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Q:Whats big, red and eats rocks? A: A big red rock eater

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What is white and fluffy? A cotton ball.

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What do you call a black man on the moon? An Afronaut

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Why don't gingerbread cookies have souls? Cookies don't have souls.

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What did the cop say to his belly? "Hey in there!"

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What do you say when you see a black guy? Hello,how are you today?

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What did one dead baby say to another dead baby? Nothing... they were dead.

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What is the difference between a duck? It can neither ride a bike.

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What's the best thing about shrimp? It never goes bad.

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Why do women fake orgasms? Because they want to give men the impression that they have climaxed.

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An Asian, white, and a black man decide to play Russian Roulette. The Asian goes first and shoots himself in the head. The white man picks up the gun for his turn. The black man runs down the street screaming. Cops see him and the white man holding the gun, both are sent to jail for life for the murder of their friend.

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9/11

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roses are blue, violets are red. I am color blind

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What's worse than a Holocaust in your apple? What.

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Chuck Norris walks into a bar and the bar says "ouch!"

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops