What's worse than molding bread? Babies in the toaster.

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a man with a scar on his right hand walked in to a b c d e f g h i j k l m n o p q r s t u v w x z y.

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what is black and looks like a mushroom? a black mushroom

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My girlfriend is getting an abortion tonight. Its a surprise.

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How many Jews can you fit in the car? 4 in the seats and 6 million in the ashtray.

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Why did the person get hit by a fridge? They didn't for its physically impossible for most people to throw a normal sized refrigerator.

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Why did the goose cross the road? He was playing duck, duck, goose

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What is yellow, has wheels, and lies on its back? A school bus in a terrible accident.

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Q:why didn't billy go to soccer practice A:there was a billboard stapled to his neck

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A handicapped man walks into a bar...

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What's worse than breaking your leg and not being able to walk? Breaking your neck because you will most likely not be able to walk from the high probability of being paralyzed for the rest of your life.

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Why was billy sad? He was being brutally hacked to peices behind his garage

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What do you call a women with two black eyes? Someone trapped in the cycle of violence that is domestic abuse. The few friends and family members she still speaks with tell she should leave. They don't know about the last time she threatened to leave him, when he held a gun to her throat and screamed "You try an leave me I'll kill you and your precious god damn babies!" Now she suffers silently for fear of what he might do to her family, but is increasingly worried about the way her husband has begun looking at their 13 year old daughter. Every night she kneels at the foot of her bed and prays for death, over the sounds of her own sobbing and her husbands drunken rage. Also she is a slow learner.

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doctor: hey u ready to get home person: yea doctor: that sucks cause u have cancer

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Why didn't the chicken cross the road? because it got shot before it could get there.

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What's black and gets in trouble a lot? A dog with black fur that has not been well trained.

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Roses are red Violets are blue I suck at rhyming Refrigerator.

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Chuck Norris screams in pain.

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What did the flight attendant get for Christmas? A Trebuchet from medieval times dating back to the 12th Century CE.

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What's red and smells like paint? Red paint.

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Why did the little kid use pillows at night? Because he was constipated.

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What did the cat say to the dog? - meow!

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Q: What has one eye but cannot see? A: A blind cyclops

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Want to here a joke? Then get off this site!

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops