Guess what? That is actually a ridiculously broad question, and I can be referring to anything. You really have no chance in guessing "what" is. As a matter of fact, I can just be thinking about a thought of something else, which is not even a concrete thing. Therefore, you really have no chance of guessing what "what" actually is. So I win. You lose.

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Where does a leper go every Monday and Wednesday? The dermatologist.

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I took my mum for a big shop the other day, we used the parent and child spot, not like there's an age range on it. - Peter Kay Try parking in the furthest spot away from the shop and you might burn some calories. -Me

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There once was a man from Nantucket who lost most of his savings by making bad investment decisions.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? He didnt. Why do we have to live in a world where people have to be so concered about why a stupid chicken decides to cross a road. Shouldnt we all be more focused on ways to get a better economy, or maybe end world hunger?

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What is it too late to do? Apologize...

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What did Hitler say to Obama Nothing because Hitler is dead.

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How many surrealists does it take to screw in a lightbulb? Fish.

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What's black and fast? A treadmill.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? To get to the other... Uh oh. A car just ran it over.

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What is the difference between your mother and a hooker? Gonorrhea and her father's approval.

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What's the difference between a Jew and a pizza? One is a human being belonging to a particular religious minority and the other is a delicious Italian food favoured by English speaking western cultures.

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why did my iphone screen get scratched :(? because i dropped it ):

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what is the name of the book that helen keller wrote LADIUFgSLDGFhalkjgfvcgh

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Why does Santa go through the chimmney? He's to lazy to use the door.

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Two black guys and a Latino were walking down the street. One of the black guys says to the Latino, "You have some lint on your suit." The Latino brushes it off and says, "Thank you. I have an important meeting with the board of trustees this afternoon, and it would have been embarrassing if I had lint on my suit."

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Roses are Red, Violets are blue, I'm a Schizophrenic And so am I

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What do you call a dog with no legs? Doesn't matter what you call it because it isn't coming.

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What do you call a quadriplegic man at a museum? "Sir," unless you happen to know his given name, in which case it would be most polite to call him that.

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The Olympics

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I once was an adventurer like you. But then I quit.

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Q. A man walks into a library and asks the librarian for a book on suicide? A. The librarian hands the man a book on suicide

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knock knock. who's there. gestapo.

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how do you stop a speeding car? Put your foot on the brake

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops