roses red violets blue my name chad i stupid

A horse walks into a butcher shop and asks for two apple pies. The butcher says "sorry, but we don't have apple pies. It's a butcher shop." And the horse says "nevermind, I came here on my bike."

Yo momma so fat when god said let there be light he said get the fuck out the way!

Democracy.

why can't helen keller drive? Because she is deaf and blind.

What do the Chinese call "Ping Pong"? Ping Pong

Why was six afraid of seven? Because seven's dad owned a shot gun.

What's worse than falling in the mud whilst wearing a suit? Burying your parents.

What is the sun's favorite day of the week? The sun is a mass of incadescent gas and cannot feel emotions; therefore, it cannot have a favorite day of the week.

roses are red violets are blue maskrosor are gula

What's the difference between your momma and a bucket of shit? Well, for starters your mother and a bucket of shit aren't even made of the same physical structure, and secondly, your mother is sentient while a bucket is not.

What do I have in common with your mum? We're in the same bed right now.

what do u call an elephant in a car? nothing elephants cant fit in cars

A one armed blond is in a tree, how to you get her to come down? You wave to her?

roses are red violets are blue i ate a peanut lets go have sex

maths is annoying!!! LIKE if you agree!!!!! :D

If you were a cactus, why?

what's the difference between a dolphin and a ghost? dolphins aren't ghosts!!

a man is having trouble getting onto the internet on his home computer. so he he calls a computer technician to help him. \

Why did the chicken cross the road? I threatened to throw a fridge at it

Roses are red, violets are blue, the face like yours belongs to the zoo. Please don't be sad, 'cos I'll be there too.. Not in the cage but laughing at you!

Q: Why did the bird fall out of the tree? A: It was dead Q: Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? A: It was stapled to the bird

Sherlock Holmes and Dr. Watson go camping, and pitch their tent under the stars. During the night, Holmes wakes his companion and says: 'Watson, look up at the stars, and tell me what you deduce.' Watson says: 'Someboby stole our tent.' Holmes and Watson look at each other, shrug and go back to sleep. At least the thief kept their blankets.

How do you upset an Mexican? Kill his entire family.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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