Knock knock stop knocking you idiot, it's the 21st century

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Q: Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? A: Because it was dead.

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Knock Knock. There was no answer.

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What is funnier than dead babies? Dead babies aren't funny, Carlos Mencia and Tom Bergeron are funny.

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A man dies and goes to heaven. This is an assumption based on religious faith.

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A kid had wild unprotected sex. He didn't get an STD or enpregnate the girl.

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knock knock. who's there? interrupting cow. interrupting cow wh... Your mom's a wh0re.

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What did Stevie Wander get for christmas? A book

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Why was the mushroom invited to the party? It was because it was a mushroom costume party

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There is a middle-eastern man in customs with a turban and a briefcase and he is profiled by his race which is a sad fact of our society.

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Taxes are like prostitutes. The higher your salary, the more you pay.

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Doctor everybody that I stare at seems to die moments later! Uh, why are you looking at me so intensely... >:)

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Scene:restraunt Me:can I have a coke please? Waiter:sorry we don't have any, is Pepsi ok? Me:is monopoly money ok?

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What is easier than making pie? Making cake!

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Why do fat people commit suicide

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Why did sally fall off the swing? Because her grandfather hit her with a wrench.

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A man walks into a bar. The bartender asks what he'd like to drink. The man pulls out his gun, shoots the surprised bartender, and proceeds to execute all the patrons of the bar and finally commit suicide. A post-mortem identification of the man identifies him as a victim of childhood sexual abuse and a diagnosed schizophrenic. There is a nice funeral for all the victims and the media respectfully minimizes exposure of the event.

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Knock, Knock!! Who's there?! The Police!! Open the f*cking door and get down on your knees.

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what do you call a martial arts instructor with a medical degree who's name is Richard? Craig... just kidding, Richard

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Who has two thumbs and lost them? Me but I can't really point at myself due to the lack of thumbs.

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You walk into a plane full of Arabs talking about how much they hate America. You arrive at your destination enlightened about the problems in American society

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Q: How many ghetto people does it take to carry a fat gorilla? A: 14

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How do you make a bull angry? Light it on fire

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What kind of shots I'd John take at night? Insulin, because he's a diabetic.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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