How do you keep an idiot in suspense?

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Whats worse than a pile of dead babies? A live one at the bottom.

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What's worse than a baby nailed to a tree? Ten babies nailed to a tree. What's worse than ten babies nailed to a tree? One baby nailed to ten trees.

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Did you here about the guy who got his right leg and right arm cut off? I made him up but he would make one good anti-joke.

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Why did the fat guy ride his camel to the grocery store? Because he didn't want to walk to the grocery store

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What do you call a fish with no eye? A fsh

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What's funnier than a dead baby? A lot of things. Dead babies are not funny.

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What did the Catholic Priest say to Chris Hanson? Nothing. He attempted to flea, and was quickly taken down by law enforcement. He was then detained and processed and charged with Intent to commit statutory rape with a minor under the age of 14. He's still awaiting trial.

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Why did the lemming jump off a cliff? Because he was suicidal.

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Jesus walks into a hotel, slams four nails down on the counter, and says, "Put me up for the night!" The concierge looks at him and says, "You're not Jesus. Jesus was brutally murdered approximately 1,970 years ago. And although I may not be a believer, his teachings have brought comfort and solace to millions of people around the world. Nor do we accept nails as payment. Please remove yourself from the premises or I will call security."

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What did the elephant say to the zebra? Nothing, elephants can't talk.

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How many black people does it take to solve a complex physics equation? Trick question

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ekoj

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An automobile mechanic busted an engine fuse. A prostitute had oral sex with a Marine. An Inuit hunter detonated a sea mammal with TNT. What do they all have in common? They all blew a seal.

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What do call the time things don't go the way you plan them? Reality. bitch

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Why you don't laught when you see a black guy on a scooter? Because it could be your.

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Why was the boy kissing up to his parents? He only wanted them to say "I love you" for once.

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Three women are sitting in a bar. One is drinking beer, one is drinking wine and one is drinking vodka. Which one is the widow? The one whose husband is dead.

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When I see the Viagra commercial telling you about all the side effects and they say "if you have an erection lasting for more than 4 hours, call a doctor." If I have an erection that lasts that long, I'm not calling a doctor. I'm calling my mom; who I always call when I'm sick.

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Wizard: If you could get any one thing in the world, what would it be son? Son: Another father that grants more wishes.

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Laura Pratz..

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what's worse than finding a worm in your apple. finding an apple in your pet worm.

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How do you make a chicken fly? Throw it

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9/11.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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