How many dogs does it take to screw in a light bulb? Dogs do not have aposable thumbs therefore they cannot screw in light bulbs

knock knock. Who is there? You have. You have who? Your entire family in my basement.

What's worse then failing a math test? Your mom getting shot

What's brown and smells Iike crap? My brother he doesn't shower and is Hispanic

What did the one alcoholic say to the other? We are both alcoholics

What did the homeless man get for Christmas? HIV

How many licks does it take to get to the center of a Tootsie Pop? It's hard to say, as this number depends on a large number of factors including the average area covered by one lick, the pH of saliva, the solubility of Tootsie Pops, the temperature of both the saliva and the Tootsie Pop, and the amount of saliva deposited on the Tootsie Pop after each lick. This is not to mention all the manufacturing irregularities that may occur during production, and varying tongue shapes and solvency properties of saliva.

Your mother is so stupid that she has lived a very unfulfilling life due to her lack of education.

I am the best i am the worst My wife was buried in hearse

Why did the blind man get hit by a bus? Because his seeing-eye dog was distracted by a squirrel and ran off, leaving the man in the middle of the cross-walk in heavy traffic.

What was black, then white, now dead all over? Michael Jackson.

why do mexicans get made fun of

A duck walks into a bar. He sees Khloe Kardashian sitting on a barstool. The duck runs out of the bar screaming.

What's the difference between a Ferrari and a pile of dead babies? I don't have a Ferrari in my garage.

Your mother is so fat because she inherited poor genes and dietary habits from her own parents.

Why did the chicken cross the road Why? Because his house was burning down on the other side

The joke below this comment is stupid. Lets go Mets

What do you call a two headed platypus? Go ask him, I'm sure he has a name.

Is your Alzheimers getting better? I have alzeimers?...

"You can't get past" "I'll get future" dad cri mom cri boy bang girl girl cri women's rites sholdnt exist.

Why did the cookie go to the hospital? He had cancer.

whats funny with two wheels? A kid falling off his bike

What happens when a bunch of animals break into your house... they eat you.

No!

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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