Yo mamma's so fat it's a legitimate medical condition

whats worse than one week in school? two weeks in school. whats worse than two weeks in school? three weeks in school whats worse than three weeks in school? child abuse, killing animals and murder

How do you know you're crazy? Consult the pink pheasent to your left

a man walks into a bar..... OWW!!!!!!

-Knock! Knock! -Who's there? -Bob. Is Brian's here? -Wrong adress. Brian's home is the first one at your right. -Oh sorry. Have a nice day.

Why was billy sad because in the morning he witnessed his mom get stabbed in the throat repeatedly by a clown then he saw the clown in the cop car but his mask was off and it turned out to be billys dad

An englishman, Irishman and scottishman are standing on the side of a cliff. The Irishman and englishman both jump off the cliff. The scottishman says "oh,shit".

Quick! It's a fly, call the swat team!!!

A black man walked into a bar. He cashed in big on workers comp.

What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? Getting raped.

Police say's 'have you been drinking' and you reply back saying 'YES' then the police brings out the blower and you blow, it says on it that you are fine, but then the cops ask you 'what did you drink' and you just say 'well i drank juice for breakfast then had some water, tea, coffee' the cops get really angry but before he says anything you say that ' I AM MUSLIM'

What did the pirate say when his parrot died? Nothing. He was upset and didn't really feel like talking.

deez nuts

How old is victor? Half past dead

What did the skeleton say to the vampire? Nothing because a skeleton wouldn't have a larynx.

What did the Mexican, the European, and the Canadian all have in common? They weren't used in this joke the last time someone posted it on anti-joke.com.

I went to the bookstore to buy me a Where's Waldo book. I looked through the store and couldn't find it anywhere.... Well played waldo, well played.

What does Mitt Romney approve of flip flops? They feel good on his feet.

What has eyes but can't see? A blind person.

Why did the girl fall off the swing? She had no arms. Why couldn't she get back up? She had no legs.

why can't a blonde count to 70? cause 69 is a mouth full

person: Ask me if i'm a tree other person: are you a tree? person: no

Why did the chicken cross the road? Because he has an abusive farmer and needs to get away before it gets any worse.

knock knock Who's there? Me Me who? Me Doa Kong Oh, Hi! Come on in.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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