A: Knock, knock. A: Knock, knock! A: Um ... Knock, knock! B: Sorry, I didn't want to answer the door.

An Asian woman is driving home from work and arrives in 30 minutes, which is strange because it normally does not take that long but she left during rush hour and the traffic was very bad at the time.

-Knock, knock! -Who is it? -Me

What is green but looks like a silver car? A silver car....I lied about the green part.

What did the blind, deaf and mute kid get for Christmas? Cancer

Why did the chicken cross the road? It had AIDS

Roses are red, Violets are blue, Actually, violets are violet

why is caleb mears sucha perv? becasuee its calebbbb ahahahahahahah

Why can't Jay cut his hair? Because he has AIDS

What's worse then finding a worm in your apple? - Getting raped by an giant scorpion.

why didn't the baby cry once it came out of the womb? because it was a stillborn.

What was the weather like at the rap concert?there was a lil wayne.I DID A FUNNY! !!

(To the tune of Perry the Platypus) He's a completely retarded Allosaurus of action! A purple dopey dimwit who always giggles away! He never does anything But children's songs he does sing And the little kids squeal whenever they hear him say... *i love you, you love me* He's Barney! Barney the Dinosaur!

Roses are red, Violets are blue. Daddy drinks, Because you cry.

Why did the Chicken cross the Road? To get to the other side! (To fully appreciate the subtle nuisances of this joke, you really have to be a chicken.)

Why are there no aspirin factories in the Amazon Rainforest? Because it would be unprofitable to build a factory that requires a large workforce in an uninhabited area.

A blond, a brunette, and a redhead all entered their designated classrooms to begin AP testing. They all worked extraordinarily hard to earn a passing grade and receive college credit. The brunette and the redhead received passing, yet average, grades. The blond also received a score that reflected the amount of effort she put into studying and memorizing the material, because there is no correlation between hair color and intelligence.

Q: What is black, white, and red all over? A: A white wall with black and red paint just added onto it recently.

How many dueche bags does it take to change a light bulb? 0 They're two complete unrelated things

how many prostitutes does it take to fix a lightbulb? it depends how much you pay them

The Jewish boy asks his dad for 50 dollars His dad says " 40 dollars? what do you need 30 dollars for? "

What was Tyler's last name? Grzesik.

My mumma your mumma live down the street 18,19 marble street out came you and out came me but then your mumma died from her pee

What's the difference between a car tyre and 365 used condoms? One is a Goodyear. The others a fucking great year!!! San2

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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