why did the monkey fall out of the tree? because it was dead. why did the frog fall out of the tree? because it was stapled to the monkey,

This is Jeff and I gots to take a HUGE SHIT. I bet its gonna be smelly and runny. After I wipe I'm gonna lick it and taste it. I bet it tastes GOOD. I hope it has a lil blood in it too.

If a tree falls in the forest and nobody is around, does anyone really care?

What's red and bad for your teeth? A brick

A man walks into a bar. Oh, wait, no. It was a horse. So... A man walks into a horse

What was the last thing that went through the WTC jumper's head? His ankles.

A man drops a penny between a Jew and a homosexual. The man says "oh excuse me," picks up his penny and continues with his day.

Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? Because it was dead.

How do you kill a priest? Shoot him in the forehead.

Why can't Helen Keller drive? Shes dead.

MOTHER OF GOD!! What is this horse doing in here?!

A horse walks into a bar. The bartender asks "why the long face?' The horse say " i have testicular cancer."

Roses are red Violets are blue Most poems rhyme But this one doesnt

emma: how will we survive zombies? mat t: just give me a blow job ......4 seconds later emma: so what now?

What's white and black and red all over? Slaughtered Cows.

Why did little Sally fall off the swing? Because she had no arms. Knock Knock. Who's there? Not Sally.

kknocckkck knockckkckccck hue's theeeair? TTThhe pOOOliCCee. fffor whaaa? yyouu rr arreesstedd forrr drrunkkkc dddrivvinnng! Puuut urerre frreaakkki'n hannnddss uppp!

your moms tits are so big she may have breast cancer she may have breast cancer which takes approximitely 300,000 lives per year

time to spruce up!

I hate all races.. Especially the 400 meter sprint

Explain the term 'Standard of Living'? Not having sex with diseased and obese women.

A fish swims into a bar The town is flooded and thousands are dead

What does an Irishman order at the bar?? A beer

Roses are red Violets are blue I am disabled, so please help me poo.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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