Did you hear about the guy who fell off the mountain? Oh, well he died

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I'm Donald Trump! Wump wump wump! What's good for the goose Is good for the gander I'm Donald Trump!

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Why did the family have no Christmas tree this year? Because they are Jewish.

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? Because he had poor coordination.

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A Mexican, a black man and a Pakistani walk into a bar. Everyone immediately runs out seeing the potential danger in the situation that's about to unfold.

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What's sad about 4 black people in a cadillac going over a cliff? It was my cadillac

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I'm not saying my mother-in-law is fat, because she is anorexic.

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How was the fifty-four year old counselor in nineteen places at once? He was blasted by a cannonball.

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What's the one thing America's got but the UK hasn't... School shootings

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Why do Mexicans get made fun of? Because they are Mexican

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An English man, a German man and a Canadian man stood on the edge of a cliff. The English and German both jump off. What happens then? The Canadian says "they were serious?!" and runs away to fake his death and live the rest of his life as Frank Brown.

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One cold winter day in Russia, a man asked a tree if he was cold. The tree did not reply, and the man became depressed.

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How many Jews does it take to screw in a light bulb? One.

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What's the reason my dog died? I ate him.

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Jehovas Witnesses: Summer vacation edition reality show: BItch: Do you know Jesus? Guy: Goddammit you A*Beep*SSHOLES again! I keep telling you all this is m0thertrucking Spain, I know like 500 Jesus`s living in this town alone! *slams door* Moral: Everybody knows at least something about the goddamn Jesus! Ill try asking "Is he the guy that lives downstairs?" Next time and see what happens.

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What do you call a moldy apple? ... A moldy apple.

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What is the sound of one hand clapping? I don't know you have a hand try it yourself lazy prick.

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jamie is a noob jamie is a noobjamie is a noobjamie is a noobjamie is a noobjamie is a noobjamie is a noobjamie is a noobjamie is a noobjamie is a noobjamie is a noobjamie is a noobjamie is a noobjamie is a noobjamie is a noobjamie is a noobjamie is a noobjamie is a noobjamie is a noobjamie is a noobjamie is a noobjamie is a noobjamie is a noobjamie is a noobjamie is a noobjamie is a noobjamie is a noobjamie is a noobjamie is a noobjamie is a noobjamie is a noobjamie is a noobjamie is a noobjamie is a noobjamie is a noobjamie is a noobjamie is a noobjamie is a noobjamie is a noobjamie is a noobjamie is a noobjamie is a noobjamie is a noobjamie is a noobjamie is a noobjamie is a noobjamie is a noobjamie is a noobjamie is a noobjamie is a noobjamie is a noobjamie is a noob

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joke

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A man dies on the operating table and finds himself in front of the Pearly Gates. St Peter looks at him and says " You are having a hallucination due to all the drugs they have given you and because your brain releases chemicals when you die. I am not real and there is not heaven or a god." Upon resuscitation the man contemplates his hallucination and becomes an Atheist.

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Whats the difference between a new ferrari and a pile of dead babies? I don't have a new ferrari in my garage.

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Q: what did the man with a broken jaw say? A: nnamkkiuuiriwojjkmgfmls!!!!

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Roses are red Violets are blue I am adopted And so are you

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whats yellow and very big? I dont know. no one will tell me

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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