what is long,hard and holds semen,a submarine , i spelled seamen wrong

I DO NOT CARE ABOUT NOVA! MY NAME IS VIKTOR REZNOV! AND I WILL HAVE MY REVENGE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Two ducks are sitting in the bathtub. One asks, "Hey, can you please pass the soap?" The other responds, "Sure, if you pass the typewriter."

Why can't Elvis Presley drive a car backwards? Because he's dead!

Non-Anti-Joke.com!

I you beat Chuck Norris in arm wrestling, you will be proud of yourself and he will go home with nothing.

What's the difference between a pile of dead babies and a tree There isn't a tree in my garage

How do you kill a black man There is many ways

Q. How do you make a fruit punch? A. In a punch bowl, mix together fruit punch, pineapple juice and ginger ale. Add scoops of sherbet into the punch. Wait for the sherbet to begin melting, approximately 10 minutes, stir gently, and serve.

Q: How do mentally retarted people read books A: They dont

Why was Charles bleeding, because he was stabbed in the head with a needle

What do a book and a tractor have in common? Both are for driving, except the book.

what leaves a bigger memory than a passionate kiss? A STAB WOUND!

Why did the man punch his wife? Because he was angry

Why is Barney green and purple? Because the producers of the show decided to make him that way

What do you call a group of black people? A group, you racist.

Shaun Sutton Call me: 1-800-tryhard ;)

I'm Coming

What do gay horses eat? A combination of straw and legumes, much like heterosexual horses do.

Two cows in a field one says Moo the other says, Moo

An Amish man walks into a bar. He then orders a non-alcoholic beverage due to the temperance practices of the Amish faith.

whats worse than a dog biting you? two dogs biting you whats worse than that? the Holocaust whats worse than that three dog bites and one of them happens to have rabies

Their were three business men going on a trip, they had only one bed in the hotel so they had to sleep in the same bed. The next day guy on the right said i a great handjob last night and the guy on the left said the same thing. The guy in the middle said last night i was dreaming i was skiing

what do you call a middle eastern man on a plane? a passenger.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...