What did the lawyer name is daughter? Caroline, in honor of his grandmother who died in THe Holocaust.

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The neighbours challenged me to a water fight so I am updating Anti jokes while i let the kettle boil.

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What do you call a black man on the moon? An astronaut.

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whats white and sticking?... glue, you dirty bastard

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what do you do if you see an asian trip on a step? help him/her up and ask if their alright.

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Why can't Helen Keller drive? Because she is a woman

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Inbreeding is no laughing matter but damn is it funny.

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Jim: Kevin, how old are you? Kevin cries because they are twins. His Brother was hit in the head with a bat yesterday and does not remember anything.

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whats 2+2? 4

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What has two eyes, two arms and two legs........ a woman who lost her baby to a miscarrage.

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A man walks into a casino, and when he walks out his family has no home.

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What do I have in common with your mum? We're in the same bed right now.

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Why did the genie not grant the man his 3 wishes? Genies don't exist, only vampires live in lamps.

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? Because it was dead. Why did a second monkey fall out of the tree? Because it was stapled to the first monkey. Why did a third monkey fall out of the tree? Peer pressure.

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When life gives you limes, say hey! wait a second ,aren't these meant to be lemons? then kill yourself

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Why do birds suddenly appear? If you were more observant, you would notice they usually approach gradually.

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Thank you, you remind me that I am not insane, just because I believe we humans can accomplish more, by uniting as one, rather than fighting one another. I feel as if I belong somewhere else, yet the question remains always, are people such as you better, or are we relics from the past?

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A lion walks in to a bar, and murders everyone inside. This is why animals are not aloud in bars.

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how does a zookeeper build a snowman. same as everyone else

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If God gives you lemons you find a new God

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Q. What did Nelson say to his men before they boarded ship? A. "Board ship men"

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What's worse than dropping a dollar down the drain? Getting a needle shoved up your penis and it scrapes the insides of your balls open so that all of the sperm pours out of your balls and you are screaming in agony and you can never have children in the future.

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What's brown and seven feet tall? A door

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a murderer sees a young child left alone at a park... he promptly finds the childs mother and returns her to her home.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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