What do you get when you cross Chuck Norris with a Cheetah? A yellow Chuck Norris with black spots.

Q: What did Helen Keller say to the bartender? A: "I would like a bud lite please" it was a different Helen Kellar

"Knock knock" "Who's there?" "Your landlord, clear out your stuff by tuesday"

Did you hear about the black guy who went to college? I did too, he worked hard for four years, partied in moderation, but graduated with a degree in chemical engineering and became very successful in the business world in order to support his wife and two children.

Doorbell salesman.

what did the book say to the lamp? nothing because BOOKS CANT TALK

How many dead babies can you fit in the trunk of a car? Depends on how much you compress them.

Why did Sally fall off the swing? Because she had no arms or legs. Knock knock? Whos there? Not Sally. What did Sally get for Christmas? Cancer.

What did the alcoholic do when he finished his beer? Opened another one.

Y2K

Why did to plane crash because the pilot was a tomato

What do you call a middle eastern man flying a plane?? A pilot.

Your mom goes to college

want to hear a joke? so a guy comes into a bar, wait no it was a horse so a guy comes into a horse,,,

How do you poop without it splashing? clench clench, release, clench clench, release, clench, release, clench, release.

Hey youknow what's funny???? Jokes

1+1=3 If you don't use a condom.

A man attempts to sign in to PlayStation Network... And succeeds, proceeding to enjoy the console's numerous award winning exclusive titles such as LittleBigPlanet and Uncharted 2, along with utilizing the system's Blu Ray capabilities and playing with his friends online in an absolutely free network, on what many consider to be the superior console to the Xbox 360.

Why do women wear perfume and makeup? Because they smell bad and are ugly.

how do you make a plumber cry kill his family

Roses are red, Violets are blue, Sausage is brown, and so is my wife.

What's worse then having Casey Anthony babysit your child? A girl asking, "Is it in?"

What do you call a successful black man who has it all? A hip hop artist.

anti jokes

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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