Why did the boy not eat his ice cream? He was addicted to self afflicting. The blood from one of his newer slashes oozed out on the cone which being wafer slowly got soggy. At this point the ice cream slid out of the cone as it was soggy and as he went to eat it, he found an abssence of ice cream. After this unprecedented occurance he gave up with his self harming, so all was good.

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How can you tell if a duck is sleeping? Look at its eyes.

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Why do mexicans like tacos? Because tacos are a very well liked food and they happen to taste good

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Yo mama so stupid, she should be worried about Alzheimer's disease.

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Two guys were sitting in a pub.

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what's worse then death? finding that your adopted, no one loves you and you mother raped you at the tender age of five.

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A Priest and a young child walk into a dark alley.... It leads to a church and he talks to the young boy about God

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Why couldn't the little pirate see the movie? He was busy

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Did you hear what happened to the blonde ice hockey team? They drowned in spring training.

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- I was at my house last night - I was at your MOM'S house last night... I'm her neighbor, she was having trouble with her plumbing and I thought i should help out

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Jack and Jill went up the hill to fetch a pail of water. Jack fell down, broke his crown, sued the water company, bought a huge settlement and ran off with that slut Little Bo Peep.

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Whats big, purple and hairy. Has 4 eyes and 2 brains? Nothing.

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Knock, knock Whos there? docter doctor who? yes how did you know?

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knock knock who's there? The police your family is dead

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Your in Thailand on a Elephant ride... at the end you jump off but uncle jack is still on the elephant and the elephant wont let him off.... Do you help your uncle, Jack off the elephant?

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Two penguins are sitting in the bathtub, the first one says to the second one "pass the soap." The other penguin says," what do I look like a radio?"

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Your mom is so ugly that she decided to work as a prostitute and she died a virgin.

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Whats the difference between a muslim and a christian? They believe in different things.

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What happened when rudolf bucked Santa? Santa ripped his hooves off and started hitting his nose until it stopped glowing

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Yo' momma is like a hardware store, 25 cents for a screw!

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What happened when a 16 year old guy went over to his friends party? found out he wasn't friends with anyone there, got kicked out and committed suicide.

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What do you all a dead black man? A corpse.

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A blonde, a brunnette, and a red head all jump from the top of a building. They all land at the same time because of Newton's 3rd Law

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why'd the chicken cross the road It didn't, it was safely placed inside a chook house

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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