What is grosser than somebody eating their own booger? Someone else eating that persons booger

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Why did the plane crash into the mountain? Because it was being piloted by a loaf of bread.

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Your mother is so fat that her body takes up more space than the average woman.

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Why is a dog smarter than a human? Because you an asshole if you believe me

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A drunk man is that last one inside a very popular bar. He passed out on the counter before he ordered a drink. The bartender is angry at a sale lost, which would have been his millionth sale before closing time on the 1000th day of business. He goes home and hangs himself.

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What does Pontiac stand for? Nothing. Pontiac's were discontinued

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What do you call a prison inmate with no arms or legs? John. That's his name.

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What goes from pink to red in 5 seconds? A pink shirt when red paint is spilled on it.

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What did the muffin, say to the other muffin? Nothing. Because muffin's are inanimate objects, therefore incapable of speech, or any other sentient action. They baked quietly until the man who was baking them came to the conclusion they were fit for consumption, devoured them, and went on with his day.

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Whats brown and smells like shit? Shit.

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lololololololololol

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A black guy and a Puerto Rican are in a car. Who's driving? Most likely one of the two, because if they were not that would be illegal.

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What does a Somalian want for Christmas? Nothing hes Sunni Muslim and does not celebrate Christmas

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Guess What!? What?! GIGGITY GIGGITY GOOOOOOOOO!!!!! (ALL RIGHT) OH.

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Man walks in the bar then buys a drink

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Soo if ur on a jet ski and the wheels fall off, how many pancakes does it take to cover a doghouse? Pickle.

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Why did little Bobby put a firecracker in the dog's ass? Don't worry he used lube.

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What is worst than a black guy hanging on a tree. A burnt black guy hanging on a tree

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Why was billy sad because in the morning he witnessed his mom get stabbed in the throat repeatedly by a clown then he saw the clown in the cop car but his mask was off and it turned out to be billys dad

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Why was the guy not asleep Because he was awake

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Does your face hurt? Because if it does, you might want to see a doctor.

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God made Coke God made Pepsi God made me, Oh so sexy

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How do you stop a black man drowning? Take your foot off his head

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Why can't woman be cokcy? Because that don't have one (Sorry for the sexist joke, to who it may concern)

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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