The sentence below is an anti-joke.

What's big, hard, in the water, and isolated? Shutter Island

Person 1: *sneeze Person 2: bless you Person 1: I'm jewish. They never spoke again.

why did the chicken cross the road? Because the farmer left the gate open and chickens typically wonder with no obvious pattern to their movements.

Why did the man try to lick his elbow? Because he read a chain email saying no one could lick their elbow and he wanted to see if it was true. You will probably try to do it now too.

What did Helen Keller say when she got raped? Stop raping me.

A lawyer met with his client and said.. well, there is some good news and some bad news The bad news is that you're going to prison for life.

Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? Beacuse it was dead.

Why don`t women need watches? Because in our modern society, there are many clocks in most locations.

Hi

The man from Poland was so dumb he was eligible to live in a supervised group home.

What does it mean if you have five dollars and Chuck Norris has five dollars? You both have five dollars

What has red dots and is yellow all over A poisonous frog

Knock knock Who's there? Amy winehouse Amy winehouse who? Amy winehouse died by falling down a flight of stairs.

Ed Rambo. EXPERIENCE as John Rambo is kidnapped by AL QUAIDA (because he did not totally save their ass in the second or third movie riiiight) Leaving Ed Rambo, his son (Played by Eddie Murphy) up to the task of saving him, from Al Quaida`s real leader... Yes, its a conspiracy! "Okay, first Obama is supposedly a terrorist, but seriously the secret alliance between Donald Trump and Hillary Clinton?" Bullshit movie reviews. "So the explanation is that Ed Rambo is black because John Rambo married an Asian woman? What about their age? They are probably the same or something!" Mad Magazine. Moral: Yeah because this annoys you, and you all kinda love me I know its Al Qaeda, but who wants to type that... Now it does not say Skynet is watching anymore... After four times... Wow, god damn we need robocop to be real before the Termitetrisnators travel back in time into our dimension. AND NOT ADAM SANDLERS: ROBOCOP.

What separates man from animal? Divorce.

How many plumbers does it take to unscrew a lightbulb? Plumbers don't do that. Electricians do.

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jim is constantly asking bob the same questions, bob brings this to attention and suggests that jim might have amnesia. jim agrees and they move on iwth the conversation. minutes later jim asks a simaler question brought to attention earlier because he has amnesia

Whats the difference between babies and a dart board? Dart boards dont bleed

why did susie get hit by the bus? cause the bus driver wanted her ice cream

husband; do you come here often wife: i live here

Why did the first monkey fall out of the tree? Because he was dead. Why did the second monkey fall out of the tree? Because he was holding hands with the first. Why did the third monkey fall out of the tree? It saw a banana. Why did the fourth monkey fall out of the tree? It slipped. Why did the fifth monkey fall out of the tree? It thought this was all a game. Why did the sixth monkey commit suicide? All his friends were gone.

What do you call a black person who sells drugs? A pharmacist.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

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