What can you sit on, drink from and sleep on? A chair, a cup and a bed.

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Gauss what ur mama said last night nothing i found her dead

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What's big, old, and brown? A tree.

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Women's rights

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Q: What is green, has red shoes, exists in videogames and runs really really fast while collecting rings, running trough loops, has a fox sidekick etc? A: Sonic The Hedgefrog. Moral: I was always a bigger fan of Super Fratelli Brothers though...

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A kid walks into a bar and the bartender yells, "Get Out!"

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Why did the clown get in the car? Because he can.

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What's worse than watching 5 homeless men have an orgy? Waking up and having to clean the sheets

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Whats worse than getting an "F" on a test? Stage diving with a kilt on.

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How many members of Coldplay can you fit in a mini? 4, as there are 4 members of Coldplay.

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Why does Jerry sandusky like little boys? Because each and every intellectual human being have different interests

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why was the boy sad? there was a frog stapled to his face.

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why didn't the girl show up for school? because she was dead

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What do you call Magic Johnson in a wheel chair? A tragedy, especially considering his past struggles with HIV.

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Whats the difference between a black man and a pizza? One has a complex circulatory system the other is a pizza.

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Why did Pamela Anderson cross the road? To meet me.

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What do you call a black person who was in the U.S. army and survived WWII? A veteran, considering he fought a war and is still alive.

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A duck walks into a bar and says, "Have you got any grapes?" The bartender replies "No." The duck then leaves but returns the next day and again asks, "Have you got any grapes?" And again the bartender answers, "No." This happens again the next day and in annoyance the bartender yells, "If you come in tomorrow and ask if I have any grapes, then I will nail your feet to the floor!" The next day the duck came into the bar and asked, "Have you got any nails?" to which the bartender replied, "Yes." The duck then walked out of the bar

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How did the terrorist die? He flew a plane into a twin tower

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Q. why can't hellen keller drive? A. because she is dead

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a guy walks into the bedroom with a duck in his arms, his wife is in bed half nakid. he then coments out loud this is the pig im f**king. his wife says huny your holding a duck. then he with a serious look on his face says im sory i wasent talking to you

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A boy orders a sandwich at a restaurant. He then questions the cashier about it. Boy: Excuse me, Why is my sandwich so bad? Cashier: Sorry, none of our women cooks were in today.

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In an alternate universe, Jake Sulley's brother did not die. The human race proceeded to strip-mine Pandora of all its mineral wealth, and slaughtered the entire indigenous population.

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roses are gay s is justin beber s are u justen beber eats crap

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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