What is a vampire's favourite dessert? Vampires aren't real.

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Q: What did the Jewish man find when he turned on his shower? A: gas

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What's black and white and red all over. Nothing, that's a contradiction.

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What did Batman say to Robin before he got into the car? Robin, get in the car.

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Why was the black man good at basketball? Because he practiced.

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Why can't Helen Keller drive? Because she's dead.

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Why is 6 afraid of 7? Because 7 has two penises

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Why can't Hellen Keller drive? Because she's a woman

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You're an Irish male that walks into a bar full of Mexicans. Upon entering you are approached by two topless women. ....You realize you have been coming to the same sleazy strip club on the edge of town every night after work for the past few years. After seeing that you have gradually become completely bald and neglect your two children and wife, you recognize your extreme depression. Strippers now see you as a consistent, "paying customer" and you proceed seek psychiatric care, while being prescribed anti-depressants. The Mexicans at the bar are hard working, tax-paying citizens that would like to provide an education for their children.

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Your mom is so old, that she should probably up her B-12 intake to avoid sickness.

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What's funnier than a dead baby? A dead baby in a clown suit.

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How does micheal Jackson know when it's bed time? When the big hand touches the little hand.

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? Because it was dead. Why did the second monkey fall out of the tree? Because it was stapled to the dead one.

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I once was told that life is like a box of chocolates, but then realized that it wasn't

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Why are black people so fast? They probably practice.

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Which came first, the chicken or the egg? It's a meaningless question because animals had been creating eggs for millions of years before chickens ever evolved.

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Knock knock. Who’s there? Your son. Your son who? DAD WHY CAN’T YOU ACCEPT THE FACT THAT I AM GAY!

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What is worse than being paralyzed from the neck down Nothing

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Why did Teresa fall off the swing? She had no arms. Who is knocking at the door? Not Teresa.

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why did the guy drop his umbrella........ because he was getting raped.

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What did the racist slave owner do when his slave refused to complete his task? Asked him nicely until the task was completed.

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So you have been really stressed lately huh?

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Salt: "Hi there!" Slug: "AAÀAAAAAAAAAGGGHHHHH!!!" *dies*

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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