What looks like Micheal Jackson but isn't Micheal Jackson A black guy

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Math problem: You have 50 candy bars and decide to eat 45. What do you have now? Diabetes.

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I'm not late, I'm fashionably tardy!!!!

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Why did the golfer wear two pairs of trousers? To get to the other side.

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What is square and grey? A grey square.

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A horse walks into a bar. The bartender asks: "why that long face?" The horse, being a horse, thus not being able to comprehend the complexities of a conversation, says nothing and then shits on the floor.

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what did the orange say to the apple? hi

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What do your mum and dad have in common Not much your dads dead

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Why was the black guy good at basketball? When buying African American Slaves the masters often sought attributes that would be useful for manual labor such as agricultural work. The slaves who met these criteria had more chances to pass on their better, more beneficial genetic info via sexual intercourse with other slaves. Through many generations the most beneficial traits such as fine motor control in the phalanges and overall strength were passed down. This is very similar to Darwin's Theory of Evolution.

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did you know helen keller had a dog? neither did she....

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The man who invented the teleprompter has died at the age of 91. When President Obama heard the news, he was speechless.

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Q: Why did Katie fall of the swing? A: Because she had no arms Knock knock Who's there Not Katie

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Q: What is the difference between Jimmy and a kite A: Jimmy is higher MR

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Why don't rhetorical questions need answers? Because that is what makes them rhetorical.

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What do you call a man who shoots someone? A very bad person.

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How do you keep black people from hanging around in your front yard? Hang them in the back..

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, i know where you live now I'm coming for you

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What did Tarzan say when the monkeys came over the hill? Hey look, the monkeys are coming over the hill.

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What happens when you lay a diamond in the water for two hours? It gets wet.

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What do you call cheese that isn't yours? Depending on whether you have permission to eat it, either stolen property, or a nice snack shared between friends.

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noah is a scrub jungle

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what's the difference between a blonde and a brunette? they have different colored hair

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An Irishman and an Englishman are having a heated conversation about Rugby in a pub. Another Irish comes to the pub.. He is promptly given a bar stool and menu so that he can order.

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A black woman and an Asian woman are both driving their cars. They arrive safely at their respective destinations.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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