roses are gay s is justin beber s are u justen beber eats crap

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Me: Hey frank, wanna die? Frank: No, why? Me: (Kills Frank) Frank: Dude why did you kill Frank?

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Q-What do you call kids who go to school? A- Students.

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Whats worse than the Holacaust? Stepping on damn Lego's. MrBounty44

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A black man walks into a bar with a parot on his shoulder. The bartender says "Hey you can't bring that in here!" The Parot replies "Sorry i'll have him wait outside."

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What do you call a guy with a car on his head? Immediate identification would not be possible. The man would be referred to by his estimated demographics. Circumstantial evidence and dental reports may be required for identification at which points the family's would be notified. Only after this will the man's name would be released to the media who would in turn report this.

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Q: what did the grandmother give to her grandson. A: a lightbulb

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How can you tell if a duck is watching you? Look at its eyes

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How do you cause ultimate pain to a imprisoned Jew during the holocaust? Moral: You give him an apple WITH a worm in it.

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One day a terribly epileptic child is put on on a strict Atkins diet by his loving mother. A week later he finds that the frequency and intensity of his seizures have been reduced by its ketogenic effects, which provides exogenous fats for the body to burn, but limits the available carbohydrate so that ketone bodies build up. It is the high level of these ketones which appear to suppress seizures.

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Why was the asian boy made fun of in the locker room? Because of the nipple piercing he had.

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Patient: Doctor, do I have cancer? Doctor: Yes. Patient: Will I live? Doctor: No. Patient: So what do I do? Doctor: SUCK IT UP!!!

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And the Lord said unto John, "Come forth and receive eternal life." But John came fifth and won a toaster.

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Why were 50 police officers in the supermarket? A tsunami had struck and they were cleaning out hundreds of bodies

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Knock knock. Get out!!

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Yo mama is so fat that she is in a diet and wants to lose weight by eating healthy.

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When life gives you lemons, you realise that life isn't a physical object and therefore you have problems. Have a nice day.

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A doctor walks into a bar. It's his day off and decides to celebrate after a long week of working.

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Girls go to college to get more knowledge. Boys go to Jupiter because they have an in depth understanding of astrophysics and interstellar travel.

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An asian kid in a classroom starts to squint to try to see the board that is far away. A white man looks at the kid and asks, "Hey asian, is it hard for you to see that board?" The Asian replies, "Yes, yes it is."

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She is so fast We call her Email Instead of Emily...

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What do you want to be when you grow up? I want to be a .... The boy didn't finish his sentence because he got hit by a fridge.

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Last Christmas I gave you my heart but the very next day your body rejected the transfer and you died.

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why did the man throw a stone in the lake? because he'd had a long day at work.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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