a man walked up to me and said someone is dying with long terminal cancer i said who? man replies your cat. i replied i don't have a cat. man says whoops wrong person

Why can't bob fix it? I through a frige at him.he died.

What's green, covered in cookie crumbs, and lies in a ditch? A Girl Scout that was hit by a car.

What happend to the Jew when he was near the fire place He very carefully tended to it

joe: guess what. Bob: what. Joe: nothing I just wanted to talk

Roses are red, Your blood is too, Don't believe me? I WILL CUT YOU

What's the difference between a pheromone and a hormone? Hormones are secreted internally and trigger various biochemical pathways that cause certain effects. We all are familiar with the effects of testosterone and estrogen, both on the anatomy, and behaviour of humans. Pheromones are secreted externally, and have an effect on another creature in similar ways. Usually they have to do with attracting sexual partners or changing a sex partners behaviour or body in some way.

Q. Why was the cat brown? A. because it was a maori

Scientist 1: "What's your research paper about?" Scientist 2: "Homosexuality in fruit bats." Scientists 3, 4 & 5: "AHAHAHAHA LOL WUT"

>posts joke >mistaken for anti-joke

Why did the man go to the restaurant? Because he wanted to get some food.

why did the chicken cross the road??? I don't know, that's why I asked you -_-

Why was six afraid of seven? Because seven is a serial rapist and has been harrassing six for months.

How do you divide 2574 by 23.5 WIth a calculator

Life is an elephant, get married.

What do you call two dog? dogs

What's the worst part about eating a dead baby? It's a tie between the smell, the taste, and the depression associated with whatever decline in humanitsy that has brought you to this point in your life. Overall, it's an outright terrible situation.

On the fifth day of Christmas my true love brought to me Nothing, because we only celebrate one day of Christmas

Rock mattress.

A kid has no friends.

Why did the black man win the staring contest? He's good at staring

B=boy G=girl B:hey i got a good nock nock joke but you have to start it G:okay nock nock B:whos there?

I love you Itachi Uchiha, please let me lick ice cream off of your body and oh crap you're an anime character and not real never mind

Why did the chicken cross the road? Because he had very recentley made his escape from a nearby farm, of which was owned by a man close to dying of a Rhabdoid Tumor. His family was in mourn.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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