Why did jack smell smoke in his neighborhood? His house burnt to the ground.

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How do you kill zombie Jesus? You can't.

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Two parrots are in a cage. The one looks at the other one and says, "answer the phone," and the other one says, "where are my car keys."

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Watch me whip, watch me nae nae

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Ask me any question. Okay, what is your favorite color? I refuse to answer.

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Three nuns were talking in the church. The first nun said, "I was looking in the Priest's desk and found a condom." The second nun said, "I saw also saw that condom, except I poked holes in it." The third nun promptly reported them to the Priest causing the first two nuns to lose thier jobs.

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Why did the hamster cross the road? Because he was stapled to the chicken.

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What starts with F and ends with uck? Fire truck

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How do you get Helen Keller to keep a secret? You politely ask her not to tell anyone.

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Why did Johnny fall off of the swing? The swing was defective. Knock, knock. Who's there? Johnny's lawyer.

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This post contains NOTHING.

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Your mama is so fat, we are all severely concerned for her health

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ecks! why zee?

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The indistinguishable bug corrupts a bond arrow.

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A kangaroo walks into a bar, he hops up to the bartender, and asks for a martini. The bartender, not knowing exactly what to do, goes into the back to his boss's office. He says "Hey, there's a kangaroo up front askin' for a martini...do we serve kangaroos?" His boss replies "Ya, of course, but these kangaroos, they aren't too smart, so charge him like 50 bucks for the drink." The bartender agrees and goes back up front to serve the kangaroo. He pours the martini and hands it to the kangaroo, the kangaroo thanks him and says "How much do I owe you?" The bartender replies "50 bucks." The kangaroo then reaches into his pouch, pulls out a fifty dollar bill, and puts it on the counter. He finishes his drink and begins to hop away. As he is leaving, the bartender says "Hey, wait, we don't get many of your kind around here, why is that?" And the kangaroo replies "I'm not surprised at THESE prices!!!" and hops out.

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what do you get when you throw a refrigerator at a boy on a bike? a severely injured boy, a lawsuit , a police record and a prison mate

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Why did Suzie fall off the swing? She had no arms. Knock Knock Who`s there? Not Suzie

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q ggggggggggggggggg

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A man walks into a bar and says "Ouch!"

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I had a really great joke to tell you!

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What Do You Call A Man On Land With No Arms And Legs? Useless

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Ask me if I'm a tree. Are you a tree? No.

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Knock Knock Who's there? Jehovah's Witness

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Bum: Excuse me, can you spare some change? Rich man: No

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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