A gay man came out 5 years ago, he also has not heard his farts since... He lost his ears in a boating accident that same year

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your mom is so ugly, when she throws a boomerang it doesn't come back

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What do you call a psychic midget who has escaped from prison? Wanted by the police.

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Ring Ring! Hello? Hello, is your refrigerator running? Yes it is Good.

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Yo Momma so old, that she has arthritis.

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I was approached the other day by an officer as he asked... "Son where are your parents?" I replied, "I dont know i'm an orphan" The officer then laughed and walked away

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Knock Knock. Who's there? Your roommate, I forgot my keys.

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whos the most unprodutive person ever not hitler her helped over populatin and got rid of the jew they multiply like jews anyways

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What do you a badass who not a badass. Grant Lousbury.

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What do you call a rollercoaster without a coaster? A roller

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Q: What do you call a man with no arms and no legs on a doorstep? A: Matt.

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A white straight man, a black gay man, and an Asian bisexual woman walk into a bar. They are enjoying their drinks until one overly intoxicated man makes a remark towards the group in reference to their diversity in race, sexual orientation, and sex. The bar crowd is enthused with the drunk man's genius in not only constructing a joke to cover all three categorical descriptions of the group, but in guessing each member's sexuality based on their respective appearances.

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How do you stop a black man from spitting? People of all races and colours are quite within their right to spit on their own property whenever they wish. However if anyone spits on or near you, you could report him to the police, but don't expect to be taken seriously.

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A mother had three kids: 1st kid- “Mom, why did you name me Daisy?” Mom- “Because when you were a baby a daisy fell on your head.” 2nd kid- “Mommy, why did you name me Rose?” Mom- “Because when you were a baby a rose fell on your head.” 3rd kid- “Blahblahblahflismdjsk” *makes retarded noises* Mom- “SHUT UP BRICK!”

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Reminding you of your religion. The army led by God attacked their foes at the mountains, yet had to flee because the enemy had plated steel wagons. Moral: Either God cant beat steel, or he was not there at all, its your call gents, because reading Ave Maria 50 times each time you sin, without reading the whole thing, does not even make you a Christian you FUCK (yes I can curse, you cannot)

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What does a spider Pig do? Nothing. They dont exist.

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What's 1+1? 4.

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Why did the boy drop his ice cream? Because he saw a Vladimir Putin.

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An Hispanic married couple walked into a popular restaurant. The waiter arrived at their table and asked what they would like to eat. The husband ordered a steak and his wife ordered a salad. They both enjoyed their food, payed the bill and happily walked out of the restaurant.

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An Irish priest molested many children. He's still free today

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Why couldn't a little kid turn around in a hall? He has a spear in his back.

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Here is a joke for you: minecraft -blarg

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Knock Knock Who's there? *silence* Silence Who?

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Why did the girl commit suicide? She has been abused severely for seven years by her pet kangaroo.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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