What noise did Helen Keller make when she fell out of the window? None. She wasn't aware that she was falling and died immediately upon impact. @rowakaflocka

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What do you want to be when you grow up? I want to be a .... The boy didn't finish his sentence because he got hit by a fridge.

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Why did Suzie fall of the swing? Because Suzie was a cucumber.

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What did the leperchaun get at the bake sale? baked goods.

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What did the foot say to the other foot? Nothing, because they are feet.

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At a feminist picnic there are no sandwiches.

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9/11

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Moral: Sure, your number is the one that ends with 853 right? Do not reply if I am right. Moral2: BECAUSE TOP COMMENT... AND SERIOUSLY, THAT NUMBER BETTER END WITH 69 AFTER I CALL YOU! DO NOT REPLY

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Roses are Red Violets are Blue Walt dies in breaking bad.

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Roses are red Violes are blue I am hot How bout you?

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You should periodically review the most up-to-date version of the Terms of Service. Oh you.

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whats more annoying than being raped by a giant scorpian? finding out that half the anti-jokes are terrible

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What is Obamas favorite book? I don't know, ask him.

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What's wrong with Barney? He's big and purple.

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What's the difference between 10 dead babies and a Ferrari ? I don't have 10 dead babies in my garage.

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Why do white people wear black shirts? Why do black people wear white shirts?

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Knock knock. "Who's there?" I am deaf. "I am deaf who?" What?

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A Mexican man walks into a bar, the bartender asks "haven't you got a damaged liver?" The Mexican replies "haven't you got a job to do?" The Mexican died 2 seconds later

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me:I will trade you 5 dollars for 10 dollars blond: Okay! me: ...

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How do you kill a blond wearing a hat? Shoot her in the face.

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I thought about taking a nice warm shower, but then I realized that the power was out and it would probably be a cold shower.

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Tom and Phill are eating ice cream Tom challenges Phill to a contest to see who can eat their ice cream in one bite Tom finishes his in two bites Phil in one Then he looks like he got a brain freeze Tom notices and says "You idiot: you got brain freeze!" Phill turns around and says "No, I have a brain tumor."

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A priest, a rabbi and a scientologist walk into a bar. They discuss their various religious viewpoints until the scientologist gets a call informing him of his mother's death. The priest buys him a drink. Then the priest gets a call informing him of his mothers death. The rabbi buys him a drink. The rabbi gets a call. The scientologist expects it to be about the rabbi's mother dying, so he prematurely buys him a drink. It was actually the lottery commission telling the rabbi he won 48 million dollars.

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why did the guy laugh at everything he was high

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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