Roses come in a variety of colors.

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even a blind squirrel finds a nut every now and then. but has a high probability of getting hit by a car and slowly dying from crushed limbs

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Why did the chicken cross the road? To try and beat the oncoming car.

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Whose your daddy? Not me

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What is brown and sticky?… A shit…

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text your mom saying you need help, then turn on vibrate and shove the phone up your ass.

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A black guy and a white guy are in a drug store. Who buys the drugs? The customers.

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Have you ever had Ethiopian food? No.. Neither have they.

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Jerry.

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What is worst than a worm in your apple, the holocaust and everything else? Finding me in your bed (or your mother screaming "help please, no wait its too good I will endure the pain") Rather than Santa`s presents for X-mas. Your friendly Neighborhood and Future ONE AND ONLY EMPEROR R*pist Moral Man:: X-mas is a great way of putting it, after all it is your kind that X-ed Christ... ...As for your mother/sister/Infant/ screaming... Don`t worry, I will come for you too when I am done, it might take a while to violate someone to death though so be patient, because you might end up as a patient... Hahahaha! If you are really FUCKlNG LUCKY!

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Why was the boy drinking toilet water? Because he was receiving a violent swirly. He then went home and killed himself.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? The horses name was Friday.

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Why are blondes so dumb? They aren't dumb they just have prejudice against them

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a disabled man takes a walk in a park

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How did the dyslexic, purple horse commit suicide? It jumped off the Grand Canyon.

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Reverse psychology never fails.

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How did superman always save the day? Because he was a fictional tv actor so he could do whatever he wanted to.

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How about that airline food?

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What did the adverb say to the noun? Hopefully whale.

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What happens when u mix water and soda? You get watery soda

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race-car = rac-ecar

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Why did the chicken die? He tried to cross a road by an alleyway, therefore getting hit by a double decker bus and the alleyway has nothing to do with it. Also, the chicken had one leg and was blind.

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Whats gayer than driving a prius Buttsex

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I've got a tip for the ladies. Or if you like I can put the whole thing

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops