Whats red and smells like blue paint? Red paint.

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What's cute and smokes? A cute person with a nicotine addiction.

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the WNBA

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Why did Sally fall off the swing? She had no arms. Knock knock? Who's there? Not Sally.

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A priest, a rapist, and a pedophile walk into a bar. That was just the first person.

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Why couldn't Bob pick up his pen? Because a nuclear bomb just set off where he lives and it incinerated everything.

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A drunk walks out of a bar gets in his car and proceeds to drive home the driver passed out at the wheel swerved in the wrong lane and smashed the car of the Jefferson family a young family of 4, the Jefferson family's car exploded into flames while the drunk sat back laughed and rubbed the wound on his head

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Schizophrenia will affect over 1.5 million people this year. At least, thats what my flying, albino pet rhinoceros told me.

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Straight man: Gays can't have babies so they shouldn't be allowed to have sex. Gay man: But you got a vasectomy last year, so you can't make babies either. The straight man sees the irony, realizes how judgmental he has been and never has sex again because he maintains his opinion that gays shouldn't have sex.

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knock, knock whos there? steve steve who? steve johnson hi steve

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Want to hear a joke? Women's rights.

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HAHA HEHE... WOW that was a good one! i didn't get it...

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Okay, hundred billions, and because I am fucking hungry, we make it perpetual, now the longer you keep the feeling going, the stronger and stronger and you know, trillions, indefillions, nondecillions, hell, make up your own numbers and just consider them higher. Bet its starting to feel pretty nice huh?

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Time flies an arrow. Fruit flies like banana.

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Why didnt santa leave presents under the tree? Because santa doesnt exist.

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Gay's

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Whats the definition of not winning? Charlie sheen losing custody of his son because he is a coked out, old man douche bag, who only gets told what he wants to hear because he forks out lots of money to gold digging hookers.

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Roses are blue violets are red I think I'm getting drunk get me to my van

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how do u know when your in west virginia? when the houses have more wheels than the cars

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you had me at "hello", no need to add "you're under arrest"

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A man walks into a bar... And orders a drink

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Why wasn't Pat able to get an erection? Because Pat is a girl.

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Roses are Red Violets are Blue And you will be too when i'm done with ya

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Two muffins are in the oven They didn't say anything.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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