Colloqiual irregularities are a significant part of the English language, and excellent example of this is between can and may.

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Your mother is so fat that I'm starting to worry about her health.

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whats black, dirty, and full of trash? A trash can

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A black man without problems.

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Why did the man remain calm when the judge passed the death sentence? Because he was in another country and had no connection with the case.

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What did the little girl with no arms or legs get for christmas? Nothing, she was Jewish.

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How do you make a blond shut up? Staple her tongue to the roof of her mouth and super-glue her lips together.

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What did the retarded kid get for chrismas? Nothing the orphanage could not afford to give presents to all of the retarded children

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What's worse than finding a real joke on anti-joke? Finding a repeated joke about no armed susy falling off a swing.

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Wanna know how to confuse a black guy? Give him a fried chicken sandwich with mayo on it.

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I am a real homosexual

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How does Batman's mom call him home for supper? Nothing. Batman's mom is dead.

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Ok, for Christ’s sake, these sh!tty “animals falling out of a tree” jokes are NOT funny; they were never funny and they’re certainly not getting any funnier with you rehashing them every 5 posts. Fncking stop it.

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What do watermelons taste like? Sand.

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why was six afraid of seven? because seven threatened to kill him and his family.

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Whats the difference between Steven Hawkin and Gary Glitter? Ones severely disabled and ones a paedophile.

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I Have a Black Friend

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What did the man say to his doctor?

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A man from China is learning English and when confronted by a cop accidentally answers each question with one of the few words he knows, impugning himself in the process. The cop, not being a sociopath, realizes that the chuckling foreigner probably has no idea what he has just done and hands him a dictionary to help him cope with the drastic change.

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Why was the protester tied to a tree? They were tired of him protesting.

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Friends are a lot like trees. If you hit them multiple times with an axe, they will fall down.

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What's yellow and highly dangerous? Shark-infested banana pudding.

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Q: What did the air freshener say to the car??? A: Nothing. Air fresheners are inanimate objects

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Why did the cookie go to the hospital? It had cancer.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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