Why did the chicken cross the road? His wife and children had just been struck by a moving vehicle traveling at approximately 45 miles per hour trying to cross the same road. He ran across the road to comfort his dying wife and two children as they took their final breaths. The chicken was also not really a chicken but a middle-aged man who had recently been laid off his job and diagnosed wiuth an incureable disease.

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whats long black, eight inches and sometimes has white on the tips of them? a black mans foot the wears an eight inch shoe.

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Knock-knock who's there? interrupting cow interupting cow who? moo.

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What happens when you Shoot a guy with a red Shirt On? He Dies.

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Doctor, people always laught at me at work! :( What do you do for a living? I am a comedian...

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Whats worse than blue balls? Green Balls.

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What's the opposite of a joke. An anti-joke.

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How did the Joker get away? Because the Batmobile lost a wheel.

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Why where the 3 little children talking about muffins? Because muffins are smart.

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Why do black people eat at KFC? Because KFC serves good food at reasonable prices.

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How did the girl get hit by a car? Better question, How did the car get in the kitchen?

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They usually say "fuck" the police! But no one wants to fuck the police...

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What do you call an iphone in a puddle? Broken

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why did Sarah fall off the swing? she had no arms Knock Knock Who's there? not sarah

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What would you do if I walked onto your property and started to smash up your mailbox with a sledge hammer? You would be very scared and most probably call the police.

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What's the difference between 10 dead babies and a Lamborghini? I don't have a Lamborghini in my garage..

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A man walks into a bar. Now he needs stitches on his forehead because he was walking pretty fast

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How can you tell when a African man is lying? Like any other person you would use a lie detector.

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There once was a man from Peru, he couldn't fit into his shoe. He went to Brazil bought a big. Swallowed it and died.

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What do you call an obese kid with no arms and an eye-patch? Names.

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BALLS! said the Queen if i had them i would be King

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A man goes to the doctor complaining of pain. Everywhere I touch it hurts, he tells the doctor. "The cancer has spread," the doctor says. "Go home and spend your last days with your loved ones."

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Why did the tomato blush? Because it began to ripen.

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there once was a teacher who wouldnt shut up she just rambled and rambled and rambled ,untill one day i brang a gun to school and shot her ,she doesnt rambled anymore and i dont go to school anymore =win for everyone

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops