Two men walk into a bar. The first one says, "I'll have some H2O!" The second man says "I'll have some H2O too!" Both men get water, because the bartender knows better than to give someone dihydrogen dioxide.

A man ingested a hamburger. It proved fatal due to a tomato allergy.

What's worse than beating a dead horse? Nothing. Beating a horse is just too much fun

I just started the seafood diet. It consists primarily of eating fish due to its high nutritional content.

What's the difference between a duck?

How many dead bodies does it take to fill up a bathtub? Wellll.......... It depends on how big the bathtub is.

How do you get a Jew to jump off a cliff? You kidnap his family and threaten to kill them if he doesn’t.

Q: What's worse than ten babies tied to ten trees? A: One baby tied to ten trees.

What's worse than stepping on a piece of gum? A clown following you around all day throwing toothbrushes at you. ___ Zertop™

Lad: Whats that smell Girl: Nothing Lad: That is right nothing now get into the kitchen!

Why did the boy get his head slammed in a car door? Because his mother did not love him, and thought it was an appropiate action.

How many women does it take to replace a light bulb? Please advise. Thanks, Holly

What's worse than depression? Having depression and killing yourself

Q: What has 1 eye and half of a pig's snout? A: A pig peeking around a corner.

I took a shower yesterday. You have no idea how hard it was sneaking that thing out of Home Depot.

Knock-Knock Who's there? We are, now open the door! Wait im masturbating!!

Q: Why Cant The T-Rex Clap? A: No, Its Not Because His arms are to short, Its because he's Dead You Idiot...

-Your momma is so ugly, she wasnt a model. -Am I supposed to be caring?

what class did Jimmy get an A in? None, he is dyslexic

this girl and guy were sitting on my couch turns out its my sister and her boyfriend and she just farted

Wh did Steve Jobs invent the iPhone? Because he was smart.

Whats the difference between Sarah Palin and Jason Voorhees? Jason has a chainsaw.

What do you can a boy with no arms and no legs? Names!

This is a joke setup.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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