What happened when a man drove up to an escort and said "want to check my bags?" The escort replied "Certainly, sir" due to the fact the escort worked at a hotel.

How do you tell if a black man is ok? Poke it with a very long pole and keep your distance...

Why did the Mexican sneak across the US border? There aren't many good jobs for him in Mexico, and with the low cost of living in his small village, he will be able to provide for his entire family of seven on just minimum wage in California. He will miss his family terribly while he is away from them, but he believes it is worth it in the end. Once he saves enough, he will pay the coyotes to smuggle the rest of his family over so they can be together again. Hopefully none of them will die on the journey.

Knock knock Who's there? What.

How many black people does it take to complete the simplest task such as washing their own hair? A shitload! thats why slavery was so populer back in the day. (and gays were big then to because they had to shower together to remember to wash their hair.)

What happened to the clown that touched the kid? The clown got honked up

I really want to wear my Christmas leggings Actually I lied about the leggings, they're tights I love anal

There were three men standing outside. They were enjoying the nice weather.

*knock knock* "Who's there?" "It's the police, I'm afraid your husband was in a car crash and died."

What did the little girl with no arms or legs get for christmas? Cancer.

Koalas mum is a slut

What do you call a lion eating a gazelle? the food chain.

What do a bicycle and a platypus have in common? They both have wheels, except the platypus doesn't.

What do you call 6 dead people on your front lawn? A mass murder

A black man didn't walk into a bar

what's the worst part about owning a prius? telling your parents you're gay

What has two feet and cant walk? a cripple

Isn't it funny that we think it's totally normal for females to not have penises but for literally EVERY OTHER group of people, it's weird and not ok double standard?

How many surrealists does it take to change a light bulb? One, its not a difficult task.

in 2001 a man was working happily in his office cubicle and got an email from his boss saying that he had great news for him. filled with excitment he knew he was getting A big promotion and could finally afford that new toy his kid has always wanted. Feeling great the man walks up to the office window to enjoy the view he notices a very large commercial airliner flying straight towards his office.

Roses are red Violets are blue Elephants cant jump Neither can amputees

Q: Guess what my Mom and Dad did last Night on the Kitchen Table.... A: Had Dinner.

What's a skateboard without wheels A snowboard

why was the man walking in the kitchen? idk thats why i asked

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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