What is one similarity between John Samos, and the dreadful clown? they have a red nose and are payed to be funny, aside from John Samos!

thumb_up thumb_down -16

My mom always said that jumping in a pile of leaves was fun! That was before a 20 foot long iguana bit her head off...

thumb_up thumb_down -8

A bear and a rabbit are walking i n the woods until they spot a magic genie. The bear mauls the rabbit because it is the rabbit's natural predator and is indifferent to the genie because it has no prior education on persian mythology.

thumb_up thumb_down +40

Why didn't the blonde make it in a gun circle? The blonde yelled "Fire"

thumb_up thumb_down +15

Why did the black man go to Jail? He was visiting his friend!

thumb_up thumb_down +2

What's blue and wiggles? A baby in a bag

thumb_up thumb_down -31

Roses are red, Violets are blue, Some poems rhyme, This one doesn't.

thumb_up thumb_down +9

Why do women fake orgasms? Because they want to give men the impression that they have climaxed.

thumb_up thumb_down

why so serious? because your too serious.

thumb_up thumb_down -140

My friend Keith found a worm in his apple. He ate it anyways

thumb_up thumb_down -30

Why is the boy severely mentally scarred? He got raped.

thumb_up thumb_down +25

Yo mama's so ugly, she has difficulty attracting a partner.

thumb_up thumb_down -17

Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? Because it was dead. Why did the chicken fall out of the tree? Because it was stapled to the monkey.

thumb_up thumb_down +27

There is a wizard standing on a street corner. A boy walks up to the wizard and says, "Can you turn invisible?" The wizard replies, "Oh, I'm not a wizard. I'm a hobo with a long beard and a bathrobe." The hobo then proceeded to begging the boy for money.

thumb_up thumb_down +3

What do you call a building full of Mexicans? JAIL.

thumb_up thumb_down +30

Why did t chicken cross the road? To get to your house. Knock, knock. Who's there? The chicken

thumb_up thumb_down +10

Knock Knock, Whos there? a baby nailed to the wall Orgasim

thumb_up thumb_down -1

Two gay guys walk into a bar. You think the second one would notice...

thumb_up thumb_down -19

Why couldn't Helen Keller drive? She was deaf and blind.

thumb_up thumb_down -15

When I exited the hospital one day, I spotted a sign saying "Come back soon!" Soon afterwards I saw people protesting to ban dihydrogen monoxide. The next day on tv I saw an ad for a solar powered lightbulb. Then I saw a Gun control poster. I cried, this being the dumbest thing I had seen yet, and the world was certainly doomed due to humanity's general stupidity. I saw a chicken crossing a packed road. Why did the chicken feel the urge to cross the road?

thumb_up thumb_down -12

My penis is so big that some women find it uncomfortable.

thumb_up thumb_down +41

How many psychiatrists does it take to screw in a light-bulb? One, usually.

thumb_up thumb_down -5

A mercenary was sent from the US to kill a terrorist leader. He was captured by the terrorists but wouldn't give away any information. They beat him, shocked him, cut him, and punched him in a dark room with a light beaming right down on him like a spotlight. It was a grueling five long days until they said "We know you have the information we want, tell us or you will die!" The mercenary sat in silence. They took out a gun and pointed it to his head. The mercenary then broke down and told the terrorists the information they wanted to hear. The terrorists then shot him to death.

thumb_up thumb_down -6

Roses are red Violets are blue I have alzheimer's Roses are red

thumb_up thumb_down +13

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops