Why did Susie fall off the swings? Because she was hit by a truck.

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The Qur'an

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Why did the plane crash? because the pilot was a tomato

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? Somebody pushed it

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want to hear a joke? then go ask someone else i dont know any.

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Whats the difference between Amanda and Brittaney spears? Nothing, they are both worthless sluts

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why is the earth mad at the moon? cause the moon mooned the earth

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A man calls his wife, but she doesn't pick up. He comes home and shouts his wife's name, but no one responds. He walks upstairs and sees the bedroom door half-opened. He enters and sees his wife sleeping.

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Why don't women wear watches?...Because the economy is at an all-time low and it would be reasonable to presume that a person couldn't afford an item like this, thus, trying to budget in a watch that could cost anywhere from 50-100$ would be a risky financial move depending on their yearly salary.

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whats the difference between a jew and a pizza? a pizza does not have a heart

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Poop!!

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What was that pirate movie rated? PG-13

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Why did the little boy drop his ice cream? Because he has no arms.

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What do you call a black man that works in a church A priest

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what do you call a dog with not legs? it doesn't matter what you call it, its not coming

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why is Justin Berber gay? hes not thats rust a myth

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What do you call a man with no arms and legs floating in the water? Nothing, because he would drown from his absence of limbs.

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Why did the fat man get thrown out of an all you can eat buffet? He molested a waitress

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what do you call a newborn baby? anything you want.

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what is big, grey and sits in the middle of a field. A filing cabinet

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Why was the Mexican stopped at the border? He forgot his passport.

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Have you ever heard of a goose?

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roses are red vilits are blue get in the van or i kill you

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Knock Knock Who's there It's me open the door

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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