A black man "walks into" a club. Several minutes later he is dead. The police, in a later press conference, refuse to admit that the club ever left the officer's belt.

What did the psychopath say to the firefighter? Can you lend me a few bucks? My clothes are dirty and I need to go to the launromat.

( o Y o )

What happens when you throw a cricket bat at a blonde? She is hurt and reports you to the police for anti-social behaviour.

What do you call a man who has reached the highest level of prestige in all Call of Duty games? A Virgin

how do you torched helen Keller? put her Ina round room and tell her the bathroom is around the corner

9/11

Why did the idiot take a selfie with his phone underwater? Because he's an idiot

How many babies does it take to paint a barn red It depends how hard you throw them

whats black and strange a paki

how do you upset a black guy kill his family :)

Knock, Knock. Who's There? To get to the other side.

how do you make Will Smith cry? cut off his toes and fingers.

So a man walks into a bar carrying a giant clock. One of his friends asks, "Hey, whats up with the clock?" His friend then responds, "A goddamned genie gave it to me, i can't take it anymore. Here take his lamp." The man decided to rub the lamp and thinks to himself, "Gee, I'm gonna wish for 1 million dollars." The genie comes out and asks the man, "What wish could i grant you today?" The man says, "I wish i could have 1 million dollars!!" The genie replies, "As you please." All of a sudden, a studded dog collar appears. Then another, and another. Soon there were 1 million dog collars in the bar. The man yells, "WHAT IS THIS?!?! I DIDNT WISH FOR 1 MILLION COLLARS!!!" His friend then replies, "I didn't wish for a giant clock either...."

What's worse than a crying baby? A dead one...

Why did the chicken cross the road? Who cares?

Roses are Red Violets are blue Shut up I'm watching Re-runs of FRIENDS.

What do you call a fish with no eyes? a genetically disfigured fish please stop pollution.

What did the man on a business trip to Japan say to his wife on the phone? The nuclear reactor in the next city over is melting down as we speak. If I don't see you again, I love you.

How many dead babies can you fit in a cooler? 5. using a blender to puree` = 9

What does the alien say to the man? Nothing, because it is highly unlikely that an alien would ever land on Earth, and even more unlikely that they would speak the same language of us. On top of that, aliens would not know anything about our species, and would probably hide from us due to being frightened and eventually flee back to their home planet where we would never see them again because our techonology is not advanced enough and the chances that we would find their planet which is somewhere among the billions of planets in the universe, are slim.

Do you know whats a joke? Something said or done to evoke laughter or amusement, especially an amusing story with a punch line.

Why did the man commit suicide? He was depressed.

your mamas so fat all she gets for christmas and her birthday is girdles!

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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