How to confuse a blonde. Buy 14 monkeys dye them purple and orange and hide them in her wardrobe

Knock knock. Nobody answers because the homeowner was out of the house at the time.

Q: If a midget walks by a woman stops and says "your hair smells nice today" is it sexual harassment? A: Yes, sexual harassment is a very serious subject and should not be allowed no matter your race, religion, or size.

whats the one about not giving a crap? oh yea this one

whats the difference between a black man and a bench a bench can support a family

Two black males walk into the bar due to circumstances they had to go home early one of them has to leave early to tend to his ill wife, and the other enjoys his night drinking and making small talk with new friends

Why did little Jonny drop his ice cream? He was his by a bus? Why did the Kuala fall out the tree? Because it died.

How did the blind man know when to open his parachute when he went skydiving? The leash went slack.

A little boy uses a horrible curse against his classmate. The classmate is so angry he tells the teacher. The teacher is so astounded at the little boy's use of language he sends him to the principal. When the principal hears of the foul language he's so ashamed he calls the police. The police can't believe the little boy said such a bad word, they think he deserves to go to court. The court dates are set up. When the Judge hears of the hate words he can think of no other worthy punishment except prison until he turns 21. After the kid is let out he heads for the bar across town where all the ex-prisoners go. He orders up a drink, bartender asks "What'd you do?". The kid explains the curse to the bartender. The barkeep becomes so upset that he kicks the kid out of the bar. While crossing the street to go to another bar he gets hit by a truck. Whats the moral of the story? Look both ways before crossing the street....

Women's Rights

Why couldnt hellen keller drive because she was a women

Why can't Michael J. Fox draw a perfect circle? Because it is humanly impossible to draw a perfect circle.

An Irishman walks into a bar he asks for directions, and leaves.

Why did the chicken cross the road? ..... 7

Whats green and has wheels? Grass, I lied about the wheels.

Who lives on 2324 Elm St. River Grove Illinois? And Goes to East Leyden High School? The answer is Ricky Krajewski. He is 16 years old has brown hair and brown eyes. 5'11" 190lbs and 6.5 inch penis(when erect). social security # is 679-78-6283.

I used to be an adventurer like you, but then I was raped by a giant scorpion...

what to call someone thats gay zak

Why did the little boy fall off the swing? He had no arms

What's sad about 4 black people in a Cadillac over off a cliff? A Cadillac seats 5

I used to be an Adventurer like you, but then i took and arrow to the Elbow.

Scenario: A man is being mugged in an alley Mugger: Give me your wallet! I have a gun! Victim: You don't have the balls. Mugger: Oh yeah! I have 3 balls! Victim: Well I have 2, you should probably get that checked.

Knock knock Who's there? Carrot Carrot who? Carrot in the tree house, cause it's orange.

What do you call a man who does not burst into tears after hearing that his mother has died? A person that has been desensitized by today's cruel world and society.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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