Why was the boy sad? Because his mother and father had just disowned him.

What do you do when you eat a loaf of bread? You throw it up because your brother made it

A man comes home from work and find his wife in bed with another man. They realize that they have grown apart over the past few years, and start attending therapy in an ultimately unsuccessful attempt to reconnect with each other.

Q: What is Paul's nickname A: His name is Paul, he doesn't need a nickname

Do you want to hear a funny joke? Me too.

whats worse than flunking math? death.

Did you just admit being considerate? I do not care about who gets the last comment anymore, I need to tear my face away from the screen ASAP.

What is little,red and its in the corner??? -strawberry in the corner

Why did the man laugh as he sat in the electric chair? He was being tickled by the guard.

How long does it take to build a wall? it depends on how big he wall is

What's worse then finding a worm in your apple? Finding two worms in your apple.

GUY 1: Mann, I just got done working out, check out my forearms!!! GUY 2: You only have two silly!!

im a willy bum bum

Susan went to Chemistry class, Susan is no more. For what she thought was H20 was H2S04 (sulfuric acid.)

i got angry and i was like " i really want to kick someone" ,my friend was on the ground and shes like "you can kick me" ,and i'm like "REALLY" ,then i kicked her really hard and she cried...

Why did the plane crash? The pilot was a loaf of bread.

Why should people with Alzheimer's not tell jokes? To get to the other side.

Did you hear about the woman you got hit by a car? The Driver was intoxicated and had no control over his faculties which cause him to careen off of the road and hit this poor soul as she patiently waited at a crosswalk.

A Jew walks into a bar and says drinks are on me.

A man walks into a Library.... And asks for a book.

What do you call a dead man in a ditch? Phil.

Why are objects in your mirror closer than they appear? Because they are closer than they appear.

When I die, I want to die like my grandfather who died peacefully in his sleep. Not screaming like all the passengers in his car.

Two Muffins are in a freezer. The first muffin says "Sure is cold in here." The other muffin sits there untill at a later date eaten because muffins can't talk. The first muffin later is analyzed and dysected by the United States governmant and is classified as alien because again, muffins can't talk.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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