Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? Because it was dead. Why did the second monkey fall out of the tree? Because it was stapled to the first monkey. Why did the third monkey fall out of the tree? Peer pressure.

thumb_up thumb_down -4

Why did the girl cross the road? Doesn't matter she got hit by a bus.

thumb_up thumb_down -6

A priest, a rabbi, and a monk are standing near a cliff. They say that they are of the best religion. The priest jumps off the cliff and says "God save me", he dies. The rabbi says "Allah save me", he dies. The monk says "Buddha save me" he is saved, in relief he says "Oh thank God" he dies

thumb_up thumb_down -24

mitt romney

thumb_up thumb_down -81

yo momma so fat dora couldn't even explore her!!!

thumb_up thumb_down -11

How many mice does it take to screw in a lightbulb? Two, but I don't know how they got in there.

thumb_up thumb_down

knock knock whos there your mother open the door

thumb_up thumb_down -23

Long joke Your such a downey

thumb_up thumb_down -17

a duck walks in to a Chinese restaurant and the cut his head off

thumb_up thumb_down +1

What's a worse feeling than an upset stomach? Seeing a child getting molested and not saying anything.

thumb_up thumb_down +11

Knock knock. Who's there? Ostrich. Ostrich who? No no I don't have a formal name, I'm just telling you I'm an ostrich.

thumb_up thumb_down +62

What did zero say to ten? I see you found someone

thumb_up thumb_down +33

What did the Frenchman say to the Englishman? I don't know, I don't speak French.

thumb_up thumb_down +12

Knock knock *open*

thumb_up thumb_down -15

A. Why did the chicken cross the road? B. To get to the other side.

thumb_up thumb_down -8

Why did the chicken cross the street? I would rather live in a world a chicken's motives would not be questioned.

thumb_up thumb_down +1

Your mom is so poor, she can't afford nice clothing.

thumb_up thumb_down +7

A moose walks into a grocery store, he asks the deer where he could find some bisquits, the deer says "oh it's in aigle 6." So the moose goes to aigle 6...and there ain't no bisquits!

thumb_up thumb_down +1

Why did nobody bother to help the old lady cross the road? Because her actions in recent years had given rise to considerable division and ill-feeling within the community.

thumb_up thumb_down +4

connor sucks

thumb_up thumb_down -3

How many British people does it take to screw in a lightbulb? A: Two. One to screw in the lightbulb, and one to hold the flashlight because the room is probably dark.

thumb_up thumb_down -19

Want to hear a joke? No.

thumb_up thumb_down -13

w8's white and speaks russian a russian stronk

thumb_up thumb_down +13

this is not an anti joke

thumb_up thumb_down +13

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops