BOB: Hey look its spiderman Spiderman: IT'S MANSPIDER!!! Punch! Kick! Ouch!

Hey, I just met you And this is crazy, but GET IN THE VAN

how do you make a cat blink? strike him with a hammer.

Grammer is very important

Why can't Helen Keller drive? She's dead.

What's gold and looks like a brick? A gold brick. What's gold and looks like a nugget? A gold nugget. Whats gold and like a car? Gold. I lied about the car.

What do you call a black man in space An astronaut

There are 3 people in a car, shit, manners, and asshole. They are driving and shit falls out. They pull over and manners gets out to help shit. Then a cop comes and pulls them over. The cop ask asshole what his name is. He said asshole. The cop said what. Then asshole said asshole. Then the cop says where are your manners. Asshole said over their picking up shit.

People with the best sense of humor visit anti-joke.com.

osama bin ladin is dead. let's get a beer.

whats long, hard, and full of semen? A submarine

I once was an adventurer like you. But then I quit.

What's the difference between 2 flies? Their DNA

What does a hooker eat for breakfast, lunch, and dinner? Food.

whats worse than a baby in a bathtub? its dead. Whats worse than that? its in a clown suit. Whats worse than that? The baby had down syndrome.

What did one prostitute say to the other prostitute? I'm dying of AIDS

What happened to Bilbo? He shit his pants.

Lad: Whats that smell Girl: Nothing Lad: That is right nothing now get into the kitchen!

What's black and white and red all over? The newspaper classified section after a man has abandoned long, futile job hunt. He has crossed out all the potential jobs with red ink. He was laid off due to the downturn in the economy and will now have to get food stamps, which is very embarrassing for a man who has worked to support his family his entire life.

what did the man with no arm get for Christmas? A rowboat

Whats red and bad for your teeth? A brick Courtesy of: http://samsjokeoftheweek.moonfruit.com/

How do stop a clown from laughing? Hit in the face with a hatchet.

Why did the chicken cross the road? Maybe because it had escaped from the farm and as it doesn't have full conciousness, it couldn't distinguish between grass and the asphalt, so it happened to cross the road.

Yo mama so poor that she's having trouble making ends meet without government assistance.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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