When Harry met Sally, she slapped him twice without reason, walked away and kept on with her day.

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Why did the woman accuse a black man of stealing from a bank? Because she was eating a cornmuffin on the bench across the street when she saw a black man,stealing money from a bank

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A child is in class. He really has to go to the bathroom. The teacher tells him if he can recite the alphabet, he can go to the bathroom. The kid holds his breath and goes A B C D E F G H I J K L M N O P Q R S T U V W X Y Z. The teacher tells him good job and allows him to go to the bathroom. When the kid got there there was a man waiting in the stall who brutally raped and murdered the boy. when the teacher noticed the boy was gone for a long time, he went to check on him. When the teacher saw the dead naked body of the boy hanging from the ceiling, he shot himself. The teacher had a family of a wife and 3 sons. The principal of the school had to call the Wife and let her know about the tragedy. The principal also thought this would be a good time to tell the wife that her husband has been having a homosexual affair with him. The wife takes her three sons and drives off a bridge. They all die minus one son (age 14) who had to grow up on the street with other homeless men. He became addicted to crack and when he ran out of places to get money from he decided to rob his old home. He broke into the house and didn't know that a new family has moved in, a married couple and their 1 year old baby. He doesn't want to go to jail, so he kills the baby, spreads the blood all over the parents, ties the dad up and makes him watch his wife get raped, then he shoots the parents before putting the gun on himself. A police officer who responded to the scene had a heart condition and the scene of the crime caused him to have a heart attack. But, he got to the hospital in time and lived.

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( o Y o )

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What did the cookie ask the glass of milk? Will you wash me down

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Why did Sally's ice cream melt? She was on fire.

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What is funny about 9/11. Nothing, it was a tragic day for the world.

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Why'd the Squirrel fall out of the tree? Cause it was dead

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What do people call baby cats in Alabama? Kittens.

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a christian man asked god a question. he did not get an answer. a jewish man asked god a question. he did not get an answer. a muslim man asked god a question. he too, did not get an answer. an atheist man asked god a question. he got his answer.

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roses are read violets are blue u suck and ur gay

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What did Helen Keller get for Christmas? A read along book

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Red my dear, we are no exceptions.

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What happened to the guy that stuck his finger up his asshole? It felt GOOOOOOODD

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You're*

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What do have when a lawyer is buried up to his neck in sand? What you probably have is a lawyer on holiday with his children, allowing himself or herself to be buried in order to please said children.

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What's worse then the Boston bombing? The Texas bombing, considering Texas is a much bigger region then Boston.

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What does Steven Hawking and Justin Bieber have in common? Absolutely nothing.

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roses are red, violets are blue, charcoal is black, and my neighbor is too.

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Your mom is so fat that she saw a school bus full of white children and , thought "I can hardly even remember a time when my body used to be slim." She now keeps track of her diet and exercises regularly,the result of this has been a weight loss of over 95 pounds.

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Roses are red Violets are blue I have 5 fingers The middle one is for you

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Why do people who walk into bars never have names?

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Whats the difference between a crucifixion and a circumcision? In crucifixion you throw out the whole Jew.

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How can you tell if your wife is dead? She no longer has a pulse.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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