What's harder than winning an argument with a woman. Lonsdaleite which has recently been declared the hardest substance known to man, and can withstand 58% more stress than the hardest diamond crystal.

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Roses are red Violets are blue I have clamidia Because Polly shat on me.

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What do babies suck on? juice boxes!

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What is so sad about 5 black people going over a cliff in a Ferrari? That was my Ferrari by darragh hamilton

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What was the racist kid's least favorite ice cream flavor? Chocolate for an unrelated reason.

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Did you here about the guy who kidnapped Liam Neeson's daughter? Well, he died

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hey how do you turn the Xbox controller off thats easy turn the xbox off.

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whats small and looks funny? A baby with a penis sewed to its face.

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Robin, get in the Batmobile.

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If you see Chuck Norris you should probably tell him hey for me.

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A man in a wheelchair walked into a bar. No he didn't.

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what did the bot get for his birthday? .. men!

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Two black guys walk into a bar. The bartender says "what are you doing here" and the black guys say "to get a drink"....

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What did Delaware? A coat.

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What's red and bad for your teeth? a brick.

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Q: Why did the girl have dirty knees? A: Cause she was dragged through the forest and raped.

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Why did the bus crash? Because the driver was a watermelon.

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Why did a jew die? It got killed by a nazi.

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'Knock Knock' 'Who's there?' 'My name is Boo, I'm sorry,I think I was given the wrong address, I'll be on my way now' Boo walks away from the unsuspecting person's front door and goes to the next house along in the hope of finding the house he was originally searching for.

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Did you hear the one about the man who went into the jungle wearing nothing but leopard print underwear? He was suffering from psychogenic fugue disorder and had no idea who or where he was. He was eventually eaten alive by a flesh-eating centipede. When his wife found out, she committed suicide.

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What did the dog say to the human? Nothing really. Dogs technically "speak" through barking.

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You're a wizard Harry! I am?

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Why did little Suzie spill her drink? Since birth she has lacked a jaw

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I believe you, if something is possible, I know you can do it. I tried lucid dreaming once, but I felt like I began floating and that was no fun, scared me. I am pretty good at hypnotizing others, myself not so much.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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