An alien spacecraft picks up human transmissions from Earth. They continue on in silence and disgust.

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How do you get four gay guys on a bar stool? Using teamwork and coordination, each can place one foot on the seat of the stool, and using each other for balance and support, they can all stand on the stool. The fact that they are gay is prevalent.

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Knock Knock -Who's there I eat mipe -I eat mipewho hahahah -Oh I'm gonna beat your ass

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You smell like shit

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How do you tell if there is an elephant in your refrigerator? Check for footprints in the butter.

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What do you call a man with a fork stuck in his head? A man with a fork stuck in his head

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What did the coal miner get for Christmas? Black Lung Disease

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Knock knock Who's there? It's me It's me who? It's me who is knocking the door

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whats short blonde and speaks spanish? my spanish teacher Mrs. Inman

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What happens to the blond when she reaches the top of the stairs She falls down them

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OSS ARE RED VIOLENTS IS BLUE U BELONG THE ZOO I WILL BE THERE TO BUT LAUGHIN AT U

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Why did Shakespeare die? It's called life.

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How many dead babies does it take to paint a wall? Depends. How hard can you throw?

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How do you torture Helen Keller? Give her a cheese-grater and tell her it's a book.

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What's greenish blue, smelly, and mushy? The fungus under my sink.

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An Englishman, Irishman, and Jew walk into a bar. Steven Spielberg is a Jew.

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What is the difference between a black man and a bench? The bench is a piece of wood, while the black man is a human being.

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Who ate my sandwich? The office appliance that fell from the sky.

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Two muffins were in the oven. One muffin goes "whoo! It's getting hot in here!" the other muffin goes "ahhh! A talking muffin!!!"

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Why did Lisa spill her drink? Her plane crashed.

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Yo momma's so fat that she's gotta get a special door that will allow her to get through.

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Who didn't allow the gorilla into the ballet studio? Whoever was in charge.

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Two men walk into a bar. An hour later another man sees them knocked out on the ground. Q: What Happened A: They walked into a BAR.

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Ask me if i'm a tree. Are you a tree? No.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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