Why did Johnny fall off of the swing? The swing was defective. Knock, knock. Who's there? Johnny's lawyer.

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Why did the waiter put rubber bands in the soup? Because he wasn't a very good waiter.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? To get to the other side

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what is it called when a woman is president. The Apacolypse.

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You wanna hear a joke? Your dick.

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What did Batman say to robin before they got in the batmobile Get in the batmobile

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What do you call one black guy surrounded by eleven white guys? Wayne Simmonds

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What do your mum and dad have in common Not much your dads dead

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A seal walks into a club...and is taken in custody by animal control due to the club having a no animal policy.

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whats your moms inside look like nick because all there is is fat

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, This poem's cool. I ran over your dog.

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Why did Sarah fall off the swing? She had no arms or legs. Knock Knock. Who's there? Not Sarah.

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What's pink and fluffy? Pink fluff

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What is worse than getting mud on your brand new t-shirt Getting stabbed.

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What do you tell a woman with two black eyes? Domestic violence is a crime. She should leave her abusive partner and seek help.

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give my joke a thumbs up Please!!!

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A son went to ask his father about his thoughts on abortion. "Dad, what do you think about abortion?" "Ask your sister." "I don't have a.."

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What does a cupcake get for Christmas? A fat kid.

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What Did Gretel say to Hansel? Stop having sex with Ariana Grande!

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Friend's are like pinguins, they both die when you stab them in the heart.

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Hey, is that your corvette? No, I thought it was yours.

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whats the difference between a pile of dead babies and a red corvette? i don't have a red corvette in my garage

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What really killed Adolf Hitler? The gas bill

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What did one duck say to the other duck? Quack.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops