How many watermelons did the black man have? Too many to count, he was a farmer and his primary crop was watermelons.

What do you get if you pour water over a firework? A wet firework

what is the hardest part of eating a vegetable? the wheelchair

Gun Control

What's blue paint and smells like red paint? Paints

i punched my mother in the face once she cried

How many cops does it take to change a lightbulb? 1

Your Mum Is So Dumb, It Took Her 2 Hours To Watch 60 Minutes.

its my money!, but i dont need it right away

A woman is home washing her dishes when she suddenly slips banging her head on a cabinet. She passed out for a few seconds, then woke to find a great gash on her left cheek, fairly spurting blood. At the emergency room, the doctor asks, "How did this happen?" The woman replied, "My boy friend tried to drown me."

What is the best way break up with your significant other without hurting their feelings? It is better to get it over with quickly and decisively. Gunshot to the head should do the trick.

Why didn't the skeleton go to the party? Because he was dead.

have you ever noticed that when geese are flying in a V, that one side is longer? Do you know why? no...why? There is more on one side

Why was the Jewish holocaust bad? Because it's joke always end up on anti-jokes and millions of Jewish people where murdered in it.

What did the rich white student to the poor arabian teacher? good morning Mr.Stevenson.

I hated hipsters before hating hipsters was mainstream. Does that make it sound like I have a fixed gear bicycle? Because I don't... I promise... What's a fixed gear bicycle, you ask? You mean you don't know???

What do you call a black man on a bike? A hard-working individual who found a steady job and earned enough money to buy a bicycle of his own which he rides to and from his job because he is healthy, doesn't like to waste money on gas, and doesn't like the pollution automobiles put into the air.

Your mom goes to college. Actually, she graduated a while back!

Why did the woman throw a stick of butter out her window? She was mentally unstable.

Whats blue and fuzzy? blue fuzz.

What did the pimp do to his bitch? He thanked her and rewarded her for her years of dedication and preserverance

A man walks into a bar, has a few drinks and spots a nice looking lady He then follows her home and molestes her child.

A person from Singapore eats

What's the difference between a black person and a park bench? Benches are inanimate objects while people are indeed carbon-based life forms.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...