If a train leaves Chicago at 50 miles per hour, how hard does the baby strapped to the tracks get splattered?

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Roses are gray Violets are gray I really wish That I wasn't color blind

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What would an ice hockey player do if the ice melted? Walk off, as the ice is only 3/4 of an inch thick.

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honest politician

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Why did the car's airbag go off? He hit a boy eating his ice cream

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Knock Knock Who's there? F F who? F you.

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What happened when a gay man asked a straight man what time it was? He told him the correct time, they parted ways and went about with their lives.

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What's the difference between a Jew and a canoe? One is a type of small aquatic craft, and the other is a human being who practices Judaism.

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Why did the wiener dog fight the cock. Because it was a cock-fight.

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Why did the taxi driver kill the blond? He didn't. It's illegal to murder people in most countries.

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Black People.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because the chicken was trying to escape from the sad and depressing environment that surrounded him on the side he thus came from. Alas, he did not know that he would be soon hit by a drunk truck driver, who would also die, in a bright explosion of morbid flames and screams.

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So this guy walks into a bar and– Nevermind it's really not that funny.

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What has an extra toe and is a bad role model for little girls? Miley Cyrus.

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WARNING: this is a black joke Why does everybody hate darth vader? he is all black

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Why can't Micheal J Fox draw a perfect circle? Because he has Parkinsons..

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Why did the gay guy walk into a straight bar To find the better looking guys

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Donald Trump

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Whats the difference between two flies? Nothing, they're both flies.

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Why was the pencil case unzipped? Because it wasn't zipped up.

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Four homosexuals walk into a bar and theres only one bar stool left how do they all sit down on that one bar stool. They flip the bar stool around and sit down all together

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what did the girl say after she got hit by a bus, nothing she was dead

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how do you make a plumber cry kill his family LOLOLOLOLOLOL

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Women's rights

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops