Banana

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What is the difference between assault and aggravated assault? Aggravated assault is aggravated, whereas assault is aggravated.

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What do you call an African American on the moon? An astronaut

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Why is the sky red in London? Fire.

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Q. What is the difference between a bird and a fly? A. A bird can fly, but a fly can't.

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Wife: "I suggest you check properly next time you lose your keys so that you find them quicker" Husband: "I suggest that next time I sit down and have a beer while I wait for Doc Martin and his time machine to give my keys back.

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Want a fight? You Spelt F**K wrong O.o

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What do 10 dead babies in a blender sound like? Idk because I was too busy masturbating.

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when geese fly in a v formation, why is one side always longer then the other? Because you touch yourself at night...

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where would you find a blind man's car? exactly where he left it...

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What's the difference between a car and a sack of dead babies? I don't keep a car in my garage.

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Who always participates in "No shave November"? The homeless.

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What's the difference between a Lamborghini and a pile of dead babies? I don't have a Lamborghini in my garage.

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What's the difference between a freezer and a baby? A freezer doesn't scream when I pack my meat into it.

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whats worse then finding a worm in your apple? getting stranded on an island with your best friend and realizing several days later that you will have to eat him to survive. hours after eating your friend a boat saves you and now have to live the rest of your life knowing you ate somebody.................... oh and the Holocaust

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how do you get rid of your home work? give it to your dog!

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Why? Why not?

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A Blonde Goes On "Who Wants To Be A Millionaire"

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How do you kill an elephant? -With a gun? No, an elephant gun. How do you kill a red elephant? -With an elephant gun? No, with a red elephant gun. How do you kill a blue elephant? -WIth a blue elephant gun? No, you choke it until it turns blue and kill it with a red elephant gun. How do you kill a purple elephant? Theres no such thing as a purple elephant, thus contradicting the reality of performing a major act of animal abuse on it.

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Why didn't the black man sit in the front of the bus Because he lives in a society where it is illegal and socially unacceptable for a person of African decent to sit in towards the front of the bus, near the driver, which is most commonly reserved for a person of European decent.

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Why is six afraid of seven. Because seven is a rapist.

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What's the difference between a baby and a tea bag? Tea bags don't scream when I dip them in boiling water

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72

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Why did the teenager turn in his work on time? He chose not to procrastinate.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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