Roses are red violets are blue. I'm falling in love with you.

Two guys walk into a bar, a spanish guy and a black guy. They get some drinks, call a taxi to arrive home safe. And kiss their wives and kids goodnight. They go to bed early after reading a wallstreet journal. And wake up early so they can both go to their jobs as college professors. To white kids.

Making jokes about 9/11 is just plane wrong.

Thomas Hobbes had a good life Actually he was born prematurely which caused his mother to die, and his alcohallic father left him at a young age to an abusive older brother sucks to suck Hobbes, at least you were smart

Why did the airplane crash? The pilot was a tomato!!

What do you get when you cross a road with a car? Severe injuries or even death.

How do you take a picture of a man with a wooden leg? You can't take pictures with wooden legs.

385

What's the difference between medicine and astronomy ? They're different fields of studies.

Dad: sussy, do you know how you were made? Sussy: No, how? Dad: With this DICK!!

what's worse than the holocaust? black people whats worse than black people? mexicans Whats worse than mexicans? 2 mexicans Whats worse than 2 mexicans? Africa

Why are plants green? Plants are green due to the chloroplast organelles found in their cells. These membrane bound organelles are exclusive to plant cells and are used to convert sun light to usable chemical energy. This energy is stored in the form of ATP molecules, or adenosine triphosphate. When one of the three phosphate groups of an ATP molecule is removed, the molecule releases the energy put into this bond and becomes ADP, or adenosine diphosphate. Throughout this process, the organelle fulfills its sole function and at the same time gives plants their green color our eyes perceive today.

Why can't Helen Keller drive? Because she is blind and death, making her oblivious of her surroundings and would be a danger to fellow commuters. -mac

if life gives you lemons...chuck them back and say i wanted muffins instead!!!!

What's the humor in an elevator? Me jumping up and down yelling we r all gonna die.

wat do u say to a guy with a 3.5 cm choad wats hot tater tot

Q.How do you scare an emo?? A.Run after them with plasters

Why did Martin have to retake his exams? Because Martin is a right royal Dumbass.

What's blue and thrashes about on the floor? A baby playing in a plastic bag. How do you make a man pregnant? Stick a dead baby up his ass! How do you stop a baby falling down a manhole? Stick a javelin through it's head. How many babies does it take to paint a house? Depends how hard you throw them. -S

What's worse than one bee sting? 2 bee stings. What's worse than 2 bee stings? The holocaust. What's worse than the holocaust? 3 bee stings.

What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? 9/11

Did you hear the joke about the deaf mail man? No. Neither did he.

"What is the sound of one hand clapping?" "I'm not quite sure, but your on fire."

What did mr smith say when a student asked for math help? ok

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...