Why did the man go to Jupiter? Because he was on a mission for N.A.S.A.

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NASCAR being considered a sport.

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There are two hippopotamus' in a pond cooling off from the hot day. One is named Nathaniel IV and the other Timothy. Timothy asks Nathaniel, "Nathaniel, what day is it today?" Nathaniel then replies," I believe it is Tuesday." Timothy is taken back then replies," How odd. I could've sworn it was Wednesday."

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A man walks into the local grocery store on his way to work. He stops by the pastry section to buy a bagel. As he is paying, the cashier says "and here's some blueberries, they're complimentary." The man looks at the blueberries expectantly. When they don't say anything he looks up, feeling foolish, pays for his bagel and heads off to work as a partner in a lawyer firm.

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How do you tell the difference between a white family, and an albino black family? The albino black family suffers from a lack of pigmentation, while the white family just has a naturally pale skintone.

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His Royal Highness was hunting in the forest accompanied by his squires and hunting dogs. A man, screaming, ran wildly out of the brush and addressed the hunting party. He said, "DON'T SHOOT! I AM NOT A MOOSE!! PLEASE DO NOT SHOOT!!!!" The king calmly raised his rifle to his eye and fired, hitting the man in the temple, and instantly killing him. A squire frantically turned to the king and said "Sire! Why did you kill this man?! He CLEARLY said he was not a moose!" The King replied "Oh! I thought he said he WAS a moose..."

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Why was the orange so serious? He was trying to concentrate.

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What do you get when you multiply a trillion times a billion times a quintillion? A huge ass number.

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Friends and Potatoes are similar...if u eat them try die.

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What do you get when you cross a Dachshund and a Nazi? Bestiality. Ew.

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What do you get when you eat all the potatoes? They're all gone!

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Two blondes walks into a tavern, which is kind of funny, since the second one should have seen it.

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KNOCK! KNOCK! who knocks like that? all my friends break the door down...oh alright then ill answer i guess WHO IS IT? THE REAPER oh s*** dude! [panic face] NO ONES HOME? "In other news tonight, 2 local men found murdered in their living rooms, after looking up common joke style called antee joke. Police say the door was smashed in an obvious sign of forced entry. They seem to have just mysteriously had sudden heart attacks and fainted. heh heh...hey nancy....why did the chicken cross the road? [=< heh heh" "y" "because he thouroughly enjoyed darting out into traffic" "HAHAHAHAHAHAHA *GASP!* X.x dead face "NANCY! NANCY!.....well in other OTHER news ive just murdered nancy, and thats no joke." *runs*

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ROSES ARE RED VIOLETS ARE BLUE I LIKE TITS TITS

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How old is victor? Old

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wanna hear a joke womens rights

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what do you call a bunch of crap at the bottom of the ocean? A shitwreck!

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a dedicated fat guy joins a kung fu dojo he is asked to dedicate his like to his kung fu the fat man dose not he is already dedicated to being a fat guy

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If you are riding uphill in a canoe and the wheels fall off, how many pancakes does it take to fit in the dog house? None. Ice cream has no bones.

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What did the doctor say to his patient? You were supposed to die 12 seconds ago....

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why did kyle and jake have sex? Because they were gay.

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hi anti joke

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roses are red, violets are blue, charcoal is black, and my neighbor is too.

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Why did the little girl die so suddenly? The bullet got her right in the heart.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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