How do you make time fly? Develop a flying suit to put on a sun dial.

thumb_up thumb_down -19

Anti-Joke Memes Are Obviously Not A Thing

thumb_up thumb_down -12

Why did the old man get wet even though he was using an umbrella? Because it didn't save from falling off the bridge.

thumb_up thumb_down -27

How did Helen Kellers parents punish her? They moved the furniture.

thumb_up thumb_down +28

Dad: Blind side was the black kid who played tight end. Me: Offensive line. Dad: Sorry, African American kid.

thumb_up thumb_down -33

Have you ever heard of Ethiopian food? Neither have they.

thumb_up thumb_down +13

Why did the chicken cross the road? To warn people on the other side that the sky was falling Why did the cow cross the road? Cause he had madcow disease Why did Chuck Norris cross the road? Cause he's Chuck Norris Why did the Mexican cross the road? He was on his way to America Why did the black man cross the road? He was just running to his car you racist.....after he had robbed the bank Why did the horse go to the other side of the field? He liked green grass

thumb_up thumb_down -27

What is the difference between a circle and a cylinder? dunno

thumb_up thumb_down +17

How do you confuse a blonde? take the albuterol

thumb_up thumb_down +10

What do you call cheese that isn't yours? Stolen.

thumb_up thumb_down +6

One man calls emergency: - Come immediately, my little son has swallowed a condom! After five minutes, the same man calls back: - It is OK, I found another one.

thumb_up thumb_down -3

why was it funny that the boy got hairspray for christmas because he had leukemia

thumb_up thumb_down -12

What do you call a fish without gills? Dead

thumb_up thumb_down -36

A cat walks into a Chinese restaurant. It is then asked to leave.

thumb_up thumb_down -2

What's brown and sticky? A Mexicans underwear.

thumb_up thumb_down +11

You see that dog over there with no tail? You know what that means, don't you? What? Someone cut it off.

thumb_up thumb_down -16

What did the little boy with cancer get for Christmas? Shot.

thumb_up thumb_down +13

What did Hitler say to Obama Nothing because Hitler is dead.

thumb_up thumb_down +5

A lobster walks up to an octopus. What does he say? Nothing. Lobsters cannot talk.

thumb_up thumb_down +8

Where do cows go for entertainment? Nowhere, most are slaughtered, processed, and eaten by humans.

thumb_up thumb_down +13

What's worse than missing your favorite TV show? 9/11.

thumb_up thumb_down +27

Penis!

thumb_up thumb_down +22

Why didn't the depressed girl go on facebook? She was dead

thumb_up thumb_down +18

What do you call a black man with a lip desiese? Jumbo shrimp

thumb_up thumb_down -20

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops