There is a blonde a Burnett and a red head. Life goes on.

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What do you tell a woman with two black eyes? Nothing. You already told her twice.

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Where's my tractor?

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What did Anne Frank do this weekend? Nothing. she died in the holocaust.

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What ticks and makes a very loud noise? the bed

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You are being like super pervert now, I would never ever even try weed, cocaine is the real deal, you know I do not mean that. Anyway does it work on everyone?

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what do you call a muslim flying a plane a pilot

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What will you never see? A white Guy that can jump.

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Before her maiden voyage, they told the Titanic she could become anything. So she became a submarine.

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What do you call a black man that works in a church A priest

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Q: what do you call a hooker you pay in spaghetti? A: a pasta-tute.

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Do't you just hate when a sentence doesn't end how you think it will and it just octopus.

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Joker: say knock knock. Person: knock knock Joker: Who's there?

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In what way are a pile of deceased children and a Ferrari F430 similar? Neither can be found in my garage, nor anywhere under my possession. As for the Ferrari, this is an unfortunate truth. Due to Ferraris' high level of desirability, and to their low supply, the cost of one such car is much more than an average person can afford. As for the pile of deceased children, anyone in possesion (for lack of a better term, as one can not truly possess another human being, even post mortem) of such a grotesque thing is probably too sick and twisted to be submitting jokes with no apparent climax in hopes of stimulating the minds of the joke's readers sense of humor.

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What did the Ethiopian get for Christmas? Nothing.

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Q: Why do Mexicans love rice and beans? A: Because it's fairly easy to grow in places with relatively low rainful and high temperatures like that in which they live in.

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What is funnier than the funniest thing in the world? Something funnier than the world!

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What do you call a man with no arms and no legs sitting on your couch? My brother.

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What do you say if you see your TV floating in the middle of the night? I'm not sure, but I would probably have nightmares for a couple weeks.

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Q: What did William Wallace say to Beyonce after Taylor Swift's performance? A: Nothing, because William Wallace has been dead for some time now.

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Barack Obama and a kangaroo pull up to a gas station. The gas station attendant takes one look at the kangaroo and says, "You know, we don't get many kangaroos here." Barack Obama replies, "At these prices, I'm not surprised. That's why we need to reduce our dependence on foreign oil."

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What did the barber say to Chewbacca? DAAAAAAYYYYUUUUMMMM!!!

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what does a gay horse eat heeyyyyy

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-What do you call a pyromaniac on a golf course? *** I backed over your cat. -A FIREHAZ- wait what?

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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