How come the man couldnt read the directions? He was reading it upside down.

irish man drinking john smiths

What did the snake say to the mouse? Nothing. The snake ate the mouse.

why did the mexican cross the road? To get into America. Why did the chicken cross the road? It was on its way to warn everyone that the sky was falling Why did the horse go to the other side of the field? He liked green grass. Why did Chuck Norris cross the road? cause he's Chuck Norris. What do you call a man who gets a check in the mail every month for doing nothing? A black man

* How many roads must a man walk down before you call him a man? * He just need to go to the Register Office and change his name to "a man"

What did one dog say to the other dog? Bark.

My wife told me that I should see things from a woman's point of view. So I looked out the kitchen window.

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what do you call a black priest? holy shit!

Why does Santa Claus drink so much hot Cocoa? Because Mrs. Claus got tired of his constant drunkenness and won't allow beer in the house in the house anymore.

An old bear-wrestler dies and finds himself at the pearly gates. Confused and at a loss for words due to the unfamiliar circumstance and lack of public toilets, he blurts out "Saint Peter, I presume?" but it was just the train conductor. "Ticket please." He searched his pockets and finally found the ticket. He wished he had a dog, but not a seeing-eye dog because people would assume he was blind. This story illustrates the importance of situational awareness, remembering which pocket you put your ticket in, and not forgetting to go before you leave because you don't know when you'll be able to find a restroom.

Have you ever watched that show on Lifetime about that woman?

A man walks into a restaurant and ordered a soup. Then, he called the waiter and said the soup tasted funny. The waiter said, "so laugh". the man then killed the guy and sips the soup while laughing.

Roses are red,Violets are blue, Who the hell are you,Get the hell away

Found out my dad was gay the other day. Now I have to take him to dance clubs, take him to musicals and find the man who gave birth to me.

What happens when you cross a Labrador and a Poodle. A species of dog that has been cross bred.

Knock Knock. Who's there? I have a door you don't have to say, knock knock.

What screams when you poke it? A rape alarm.

A black man walks into a white man on the street. The white man viciously beats the black man.

Q; What smells like chicken, tastes like turkey and looks like duck? A; Nothing...dumbass.

so a man walks into a bar..... and says ouch.

A man walks into a bar. He sits down and orders a drink from the bartender. The bartender gets it for him and says "Here you go." The man then says "Thank you." The man then starts to drink his drink, and appreciates the fine quality of the drink. Afterwards, he finishes the drink, and decides to leave the bar and go home.

Whats the XBOX JUAN's most popular game. Call of Juarez!!!

Why did Kallum come to Getaway? Because he ran out of hats

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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