A man on crutches walked across the road. Suddenly he fell and sprained his foot. He was pleased that he was carrying crutches.

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Jesus walks into a hotel, slams four nails down on the counter, and says, "Put me up for the night!" The concierge looks at him and says, "You're not Jesus. Jesus was brutally murdered approximately 1,970 years ago. And although I may not be a believer, his teachings have brought comfort and solace to millions of people around the world. Nor do we accept nails as payment. Please remove yourself from the premises or I will call security."

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A duck walks into a bar, and the bartender asks what will you have for dinner? The duck says "quack".

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knock knock who's there me i kill you

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monkey sponge

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Why did Jimmy cross the road? Because a chicken was about to cross the road, and he wanted to be kind and help the old 72-aged chicken get across the road. Because Jimmy had a grandfather that passed away because he was too old and nobody helped him cross the road. Jimmy is haunted by that memory and doesn't want that to happen to anyone else. Especially a chicken.... Also there were no cars and his best friend chicken was on the other side waiting for him.

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Why didn't little Timmy see the bus right before it hit him? Because he was blind

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What do you call a black man on the moon? An Astronaut.

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Whats brown, sweet, and bad for your teeth? A brick.

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What do you call a black priest? Father

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why is pie good. because it just is.

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Roses are red Violets are blue Your whole family is dead And now it's time for you!

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Why didn't little Billy cross the road? He was dead.

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What's heavy, black, and when hanging by a rope from a tree, makes white people happy? A tire, in any white football player's backyard.

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I've been hearing a lot of Jew jokes lately, Anne Frankly I'm sick off it.

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Roses are red violets are blue your mother is pretty what happened to you.

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according to the ewspickle, it is Dumbledore's favorite food.

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Roses are red, My name is Dan, I have a gun, get in the van

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What's black and very long? The line-up at KFC.

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Why did the old woman fall down She got shot

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Why was the teenage girl pregnant? She got raped by her dad.

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It's the police sir. There's been an accident.

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Why wasn't Fred invited to he party? Because he's been dead for five years

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how do you tune a piano, you dont, piano tuners tune a piano, I wasn't talking to you!

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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