What did the farmer say after the chicken started talking? Holy shit a talking chicken

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Simba was moving slow,so I told him to MUFASA!!!

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What do you call a black guy who walks into your house and takes your stuff. A repoman, pay your taxes next time

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3 guys are walking in the woods there are 3 paths they each take a path. the first path lead to a shed that said blowjobs 25 cents the second path lead to the same place after they all made it threw the first guy said he got a blowjob so dose the second guy. the third guy said i made 50 cents

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Do not be unreasonable now, as for the twenty five million dollars, it is the least I can do, but if we cannot agree upon acting with some reason and dignity, as refraining from insults, then no conflict will ever be solved... ...I will send you my contact information shortly, expect the money within the week, three or four days tops. Would you be interested in learning more about our order? We make good use of people such as you. With all due respect, I would not exactly lend my sister to anybody that brags about engaging into intercourse with his own sister.

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, I have altzeimer's, Cheese on toast

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A penguin walks into a bakery. The baker asks the penguin: "What kind of bread would you like? Brown or white?". Penguins answers: "Well, it doesn't really matter since I came here by car!".

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A scantily dressed woman is standing at an intersection. She is a prostitute.

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Why don't I understand myself? Because I am an anti-joke and lack a self-aware existence.

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Knock Knock Who’s there? Your son Your son who? Your son who’s sick of having a paranoid mother who won’t just open the door!

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, Cement is grey, Shoes are myriad colors, but usually white, black, or brown, depending on their use, And I love you.

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If you give a hobo a stick he might poke u with it

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WNBA

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What did the baseball coach say to his son? Nothing. He was dead.

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to get to the other side.

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What did Santa call the prostitute? Nothing. Santa isn't real.

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What did batman say to robin before they got in the car? Get in the car

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who is lanky? Theo Kingdom

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nik nak paddy wack give the dog a breathalyzer test

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What does a person that is fasting get for Christmas? Food.

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whats long, fat, and people love it in their mouth? blunts.

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what's the worst thing ever? reality TV shows and singing contest shows

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Why was the boy afraid? Because he had just seen his dog get ran over by a tractor

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What did the Dementia sufferer get for Christmas?

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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