Q. How does Michael Jackson pick his nose? A. From a catalogue.

What do you call a black pilot? A pilot... are you racist?

A man from China is learning English and when confronted by a cop accidentally answers each question with one of the few words he knows, impugning himself in the process. The cop, not being a sociopath, realizes that the chuckling foreigner probably has no idea what he has just done and hands him a dictionary to help him cope with the drastic change.

What did God say when he made his first black guy? Oh no I burned one! :)

Why did the orphans kill timmy? timmy said a your mom joke.

If John has 50 candybars and eats 45 of them how many does he have left? Diabetes.

Do you know what they say? Words

Your mumma's so ugly. Period.

Sally has no arms. A: Knock kock? B: Whose there? Not Sally.

1unno;njfjk

What did the black guy get for Christmas? (In 1938) A bruise from the Klu Klux Klan.

yo momma's so fat she sat on a tiny chair and relaxed.

I walked into the cactus store. The clerk there was being mean so I called him a "prick". ...........

What do you call a man who has committed more than 10 crimes? Whatever his name happens to be.

Knock, Knock. I have no door.

What do you call an art history major with a job? A gainfully employed member of society, who assuredly benefited from his access to higher education. It is also possible that he was chosen for the position because of acquaintances or family members who were also employed by the company, but many people would consider it impolite to bring up this possibility, as it might be construed as denigrating the aforementioned individual or his chosen field of study.

2 nuns were in a bathtub. One says to the other "Could you pass me the soap please?" The other replies, "What do you think I am, a radio?"

Two black people fall off a cliff, who hits the ground first? Who Cares?

Q: What is black and white, black and white, black and white? A: A Nun falling down the stairs.

What's the difference between an Elephant and a Post Box? An Elephant is not a Post Box. It is an Elephant.

Roses are red, Bacon is also red. Poems are hard, Bacon.

what duz 69 mean? its a number duhhhhhhh

I hate it when I go running and my diick always gets road rash from being dragged So I cut it off

Yo mom so fat that even Torres won't miss her

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...