What did the college kids drink at the party? Soda. Alcohol is illegal for people under the age of 21 to consume.

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What do you call someone who kills their own children? Casey Anthony

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What do you get when you mix a turtle and a dog An animal

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What is a life without options.... an optionless life

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I'm on the seafood diet, a large proportion of my daily food intake consists of fish.

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a kid plays computer games alot and gets carpoltunel in both hands and lives in pain for the rest of his life.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because chickens are not very intelligent and was scared by a shadow. The chicken's survival instincts caused it to cross the road, away from the shadow. The chicken crossed the road safely, and is now happily pecking at worms.

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A baby seal walked into a club.

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What's worse than a spray tan? - A spray tan of hydrochloric acid.

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What do you call a deer with no eyes? Nothing, you should call a local animal rescue number and care to its needs.

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hating his life and his job, the man leaves work early and while he is in the elavator he has thoughts about killing himself after returning to his apartment he turns on the TV and grabs his gun out of the drawer. sitting in a chair with a gun to his head he looks at the TV and realizes that his office building has just been hit by a 747 piloted by Al-Quida members. Suddenly the man realizes that maybe he has something to live for and decides not to kill himself.

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What would happen if the whole world farted at once?

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Q: What's wrong with the world today? A: Everything

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Why was 6 afraid of 7? Not only did 7 have that intimidating look to him, but 6 had recently found out that he was a well known mob boss who also went by the name of Lucky Seven. he was in charge of a gang called The Prime Numbers. They had been terrorizing 6's city for sometime now, whether it was stealing, mugging, or even killing or vandalism. 6 sure had a lot to fear, but he knew things might turn out well, as 6 had a great ability to try his best and do what he believed in: Justice

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How do you make a Dead Baby Float..... ......With 3 scoops of ice cream and 1 cup of liquid stem cells.

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How do you get a girls number? Grow some balls and ask for it.

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knock knock whos there I AM YOUR MOTHER!!!!

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Q. What did the farmer say when he lost his tractor? A. "Where's my tractor?"

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what did johnny's dad say to him after his baseball game? nothing because johnny's dad was an abusive alcoholic who beat him until the neighbors found out and called the police. the dad was arrested, tried in court then promptly thrown in jail were he was raped in the showers repeatedly by a very large and intimidating black man. he vomited suicide in his cell today by drinking drain cleaner

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How do you make a small fortune? Be financially smart, work hard, save money, all while you make sure you don't let your earnings become a "large" fortune.

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Why did god make women? Because women are equally important when it comes to the birth to maintain or species.

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Roses are red, violets are red, tulips are red, oh shit my gardens on fire!!!

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Q:What happened to the leprechaun when it jumped in the water? A:It got wet.

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What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? Finding two worms.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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