Why did the blond get fired from the M&M factory? Repeated absences and stealing.

What did pinocchio want to become? Hepatitus free.

How did the corpse cross the road? They can't cross the road they're dead.

A child walk's into a bar. And gets sexually abused.

Click thumb up i will be eternally grateful

Yo momma so normal, she got married, had three kids and then lived a dull but contented life.

JOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNN WHAT'S THE ANSWER?! WHAT DO YAH MEAN YA DUNNO?!

whats the difference between a jew and a pizza? the pizza doesn't scream when it goes in the oven.

What's the difference between a muffin and a scone? One's a muffin.

All the kids at school we're playing soccer on a sunny day except Jenny, because she had a headache and didn't come to school that day

"You must defeat Shen Long to stand a chance"

Today i decided to burn calories, so I grabbed my lighter from the counter and put it in my pocket and proceeded to the treadmill.

You're on fire.

What did Michelle Obama get for Christmas? Cancer

A man is in a bar with a drink A lorry driver come in a gulp the guys drink down The man starts crying the lorry driver says"don't cry I will buy you another" The guy says "it's not that: Today I woke up late for work and when I finally got there my boss fired me so I get in my car to go home and it wont start so I walk home while it's raining and when I got in I found that my wife was sleeping with the gardener so I came down here and asked for some poison and you went and drank it"

How do you get 1000 pokemon on to a bus? Pikachu!

A scientist walks into a bar. His forehead becomes swollen.

There once was a man from Peru, he dreamt he was eating his shoe, he then woke up, took a shower, changed, and drove to work.

68

Q: Whats pointy and sharp and rhymes with life? A: A spear. It's close enough.

Why did a black person beat a white person in a race? The white person was hindered because a polar bear was biting their leg the entire time.

why did the plane crash ? Because a loaf of brad was flying it, and Loaves of bread don't fly planes

What do you call a black person pushing a car? A very strong human being.

mike:what did the boy with no arms and legs get for christmas tom:cancer ahahahaha mike:he got a skateboard jerk nararrator: this skate board will be worth less because he has no legs

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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