Andy: Mom, I wish I was a dinosaur. Mom: Aw, that's cute! Why? Andy: Because dinosaurs do not suffer from terminal pancreatic cancer.

thumb_up thumb_down +11

Why did the bird fall? It was an ostrich

thumb_up thumb_down -8

What do you call a full refrigerator? A freezer

thumb_up thumb_down -12

Jack was nimble, Jack was quick, Jack sat on his candle, and burnt his ass.

thumb_up thumb_down +27

Rose is Red Violet Blew Mustard is in Clue … What about Moni-… ahhh my eye!

thumb_up thumb_down -85

Why don't people like this joke? It makes no sense.

thumb_up thumb_down -18

Friends are like trampolines, I always wanted a trampoline

thumb_up thumb_down +5

What do you call cheese that isn't yours? Cheese

thumb_up thumb_down -16

Your mother is a very respectable woman.

thumb_up thumb_down +11

How many Catholics does it take to change a light bulb? None. They use candles

thumb_up thumb_down +1

How do u know when someone is horny? look at there pants

thumb_up thumb_down -19

Roses are black, Violets are black, Everything's black, Oh damn I'm blind.

thumb_up thumb_down +16

What should you do if you come across a slut with a fork up her @ss and a gun in her hand? Do not look at her and walk away.

thumb_up thumb_down +3

Yo Momma so fat, that the doctor prescribed her prescription drugs that deal with her eating disorder and recommended that she begin a low calorie diet and live a more active lifestyle.

thumb_up thumb_down -12

Why is the grass always greener on the other side? because they have a landscaper.

thumb_up thumb_down +26

What did the black guy get on the SATs? Who knows, that isn't a specific person

thumb_up thumb_down -17

What do you call a man who can't sing. Untalented and he should probably find a new profession

thumb_up thumb_down +13

patty was in sunday school, the teacher asked her "patty who created the universe?" john sliped into the seat next to her and jabbed her with a pen "LORD ALMIGHTY" the teacher said' good patty now who gave himself for us? john again jabbed her with a pin "JESUS CHRIST" "that very good patty now what did mary say to joseph after they had their 23 child?" john jabbed her " IF YOU STICK THAT DAMN THING IN ME ONE MORE TIME ILL BREAK IT IN HALF!!!" the teacher fainted

thumb_up thumb_down +11

Some potential names for Justin Beiber's next album: Headache Wailing and Screaming Eardrum Rapist Anger Half Price Indescribable Out of Print April Fools The Sounds of Hell Torture Ear Basher

thumb_up thumb_down -14

save me from the nothing ive become

thumb_up thumb_down -22

Two men meet at an office. One man says "why the long face?" Then other man says "I just had plastic surgery."

thumb_up thumb_down -9

What did the white man say to the group of mexicans when a golf ball was coming toward them? 4!

thumb_up thumb_down -6

What do I hate? people

thumb_up thumb_down -13

What did Harold homeless man get for his Birthday? after several years of a meth abuse Harold lost contact with his family. As a result Harold received nothing but an extra bowl of soup at his local soup kitchen.

thumb_up thumb_down -26

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops