What did the little boy get from his parents on Christmas? Nothing. His parents died 2 nights before in a tragic car crash.

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A kid walks into a bar. The bartender promptly calls child protective services and the child is placed in a caring foster home.

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Why did the car stop? The driver had a stroke

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Penis

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How did the ship-less pirate cross the Atlantic? In an airplane.

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Ken: Your dog is sick, he needs to see a vet. Megan: Omg, what is it? Ken: It's a medical person who treats animals.

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Why did Susie fall off the swing - because she had no arms Knock Knock Who is it Not Susie

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Roses are red, Violets are blue. I'm a schizophrenic, And so am I.

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What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. Your mom is the punchline.

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How did Helen Keller's parents punish her? They beat her mercilessly.

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What do you call a black man that sells drugs? A pharmacist.

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? Because it died. Why did the second monkey fall out of the tree? Because it was stapled to the first one. Why did the third monkey fall out of the tree? Because he thought it was a game. Why did the refrigerator fall out of the tree? Because it had no arms. Why did Little Timmy fall off of his bike? Because he was hit by 3 monkeys and a refrigerator. Knock knock Who's there? Not Little Timmy.

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A shark walks into a bar. The bartender asks someone to call animal control to remove the nearly-dead sea creature from his bar.

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Knock Knock! Whos There? Paul Okay I was expecting you

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A mute man writes a joke that would only be funny to blind people.

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Q: Why did the grandma forget to take her pills? A: She died in a tornado

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A: Do you like it B: No

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What do you call a monkey lost in a desert? A donkey who was forgotten by his owner.

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Yo mama's so gay, she's a guy.

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Roses are red Violets are blue Charcoal is black So is my neighbor

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A day without sunshine is like night.

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? Because he was dead

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Roses Are Red, Violets Are Blue, I Love Chocolate, More Than I Love You

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Q: What does Jerry Sandusky and bills have in common? A: They both come in the mail

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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