what is the difference between a pile of dead babies and a cadilac. a cadilac is something i want

thumb_up thumb_down -14

a boy walks in a house and mother says hi who are you and the boy says does it really matter whad really maters is wht you will do about your dead son

thumb_up thumb_down +32

What eats McDonalds for breakfast, lunch and dinner, annoys everyone around them, and could care less about anyone but themselves? The population of the United States.

thumb_up thumb_down -13

What do you call a gay African American Jewish German flight attendant who is addicted to many hard drugs? His name.

thumb_up thumb_down +6

how do you make a cat blink? strike him with a hammer.

thumb_up thumb_down +12

"Knock knock." "Who's there?" "Plumber, ma'am." "Thank God you're here. I haven't been able to take a shower in three days."

thumb_up thumb_down -26

fack me in the ace! CC

thumb_up thumb_down +25

I baked you a pie! Oh boy! What flavor? Apple.

thumb_up thumb_down +37

How I Met Your Mother, starring Oedipus Rex

thumb_up thumb_down -35

Peter was sitting on a bench. He had a bag of 10 sweets and was eating them slowly. John and Anthony both wanted some, but Peter wanted to still have sweets left over. How many did he give them both? None. He's that selfish.

thumb_up thumb_down -5

when life throws you lemons you should probably get out of the way because it will hurt

thumb_up thumb_down -8

- Knock knock - Excuse me, I don't have time, my house is on fire ! - We're the firemen.

thumb_up thumb_down -2

You know what it means when a priest lays his watch down on a podium? Absolutely nothing

thumb_up thumb_down -29

Whats the Twin Towers least favourite movie? Here Comes the Boom.

thumb_up thumb_down +32

whats the diffrence between love and faling in love when u love some one your not falling

thumb_up thumb_down +15

Whats black, white and dusty? A nuns fan-y because it never gets used

thumb_up thumb_down -40

GEOVANI is a queer that dosen't believe me

thumb_up thumb_down +11

Patient: Doctor, will I be able to play the piano when my arm heals? Doctor: Did I not tell you? You insurance didn't cover the cost of this operation. Your arm is never going to be healed!

thumb_up thumb_down +86

Your maternal figure contains so many Triglycerides, her belt size is greater than or equal to the circumference of the Earth.

thumb_up thumb_down -10

knock knock come in !

thumb_up thumb_down -18

what did the dirty homeless girl get for Christmas -A DILDO

thumb_up thumb_down +9

What's the difference between a Jew and a pizza? One is a human being belonging to a particular religious minority and the other is a delicious Italian food favoured by English speaking western cultures. The problem with this anti-joke is that the facts are not correct, pizza was originally invented and China; however,it looked quite different then what might be considered pizza by our standards, when pizza was brought to Italy it was improved to make what we now consider pizza in modern times. While some people may consider pizza an Italian food, this would be failing to give credit to the Chinese who invented it.

thumb_up thumb_down -10

What did the boy with no arms and no legs get for Christmas? I don't know. He couldn't open it.

thumb_up thumb_down +15

Why was the black man lynched? Because he was found by angry racists in the 1930's.

thumb_up thumb_down +3

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops