a horse walks into a bar the bartender says "why the long face?" the horse does not say anything because its a horse and horses cannot talk.

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Your mom is so fat that she has diabetes and if she does not stick to her medical diet, her foot will be removed, but she started binge eating because of you in the first place, and if you don't straighten our your life, you will inadvertently be the cause of your mothers death.

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This is an anti- joke

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This guy was walking down the street and a homeless guy asked him for money. The guy said "Why don't you get a job?" So the homeless guy began to cry because all he wanted was a dime not to be humiliated.

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three jews walk into a bar. then a bear mauls them.

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What's worse than finding a Worm in your Apple? being Mauled to death.

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Why did the 1,000 pound woman start crying? Because her son got hit by a car.

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what did the dead guy say to the boy? nothing he is dead.

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BRANDON LUI ROCKSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSS

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did you know helen keller had a dog? neither did she....

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What did the alcoholic Indian do? Continued to drink and further worsen his people's stereotype.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? So he could be slaughtered and eaten for dinner.

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why did rhys jones get shot. because he was there

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Knock Knock Who's there? Bob Bob who? Your neighbor

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What's white and bobs up and down in a babies crib? A pedophiles ass.

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I feel like making a good joke.But i cant. YN

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Roses are gray, Violets are gray, Everything is gray, I'm a dog.

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why did the stupid boy put his clothes on his valentines? because hes stupid

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a black guy, mexican guy, and asian guy race to hop over a window. Who was the LAST one to hop it? the mexican because he had to clean it first.

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a camel walks into a bar. it is kicked out because camels are not supposed to be in bars, there camels.

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Q: Why did little Johnny not like little Suzie? A: He was a homosexual.

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knock knock, who's there, white, white who, white van, RUN!

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Long ago, when sailing ships ruled the sea, this captain and his crew were always in danger of being boarded by pirates from a pirate ship. One day while they were sailing, they saw that a pirate ship had sent a boarding party to try and board their ship. The crew became worried, but the Captain was calm. He bellowed to his First Mate, "Bring me my red shirt!" The First Mate quickly got the Captain's red shirt, which the captain put on. Then he led his crew into battle against the mean pirates. Although there were some casualties among the crew, the pirates were defeated. Later that day, the lookout screamed that there were two pirate vessels sending two boarding parties towards their ship. The crew was nervous, but the Captain, calm as ever, bellowed, "Bring me my red shirt!" And once again the battle was on! The Captain and his crew fought off the boarding parties, though this time more casualties occurred. Weary from the battles, the men sat around on deck that night recounting the day's events when an ensign looked at the Captain and asked, "Sir, why did you call for your red shirt before the battle?" The Captain, giving the ensign a look that only a captain can give, explained, "If I am wounded in battle, the red shirt does not show the blood, so you men will continue to fight unafraid." The men sat in silence. They were amazed at the courage of such a man. As dawn came the next morning, the lookout screamed that there were pirate ships, 10 of them, all with boarding parties on their way. The men became silent and looked to the Captain, their leader, for his usual command. The Captain, calm as ever, bellowed, 'Bring me my white flag!"

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Q: What is worse than seven babies in a trash can? A: One baby in seven trash cans. Q: What is worse than one baby in seven trash cans? A: The Holocaust.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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