roses are blue violets are red and just like you they're messed up in the head

thumb_up thumb_down -13

What's bue and sticky? -A blue stick.

thumb_up thumb_down -28

What do you call a fridge? Dorothy.

thumb_up thumb_down +15

What's Pink And Wet? A chewed up piece of Bubble gum.

thumb_up thumb_down +7

A blonde, a redhead and a brunette were on an island. There were loads of other people too - the UK is a pretty popular place to live.

thumb_up thumb_down +30

yo mamas so poor she should probably consider finding a job

thumb_up thumb_down -4

What did the farmer say when he lost his tractor? Where's my tractor

thumb_up thumb_down +7

Your mom is so poor, she can't afford nice clothing.

thumb_up thumb_down +5

Why was 6 afraid of 7? 7 commited statutory rape on a younger 5, gang banged 8 with 10 and 11, murdered 9, and was sentenced to jail for life.... eventually the case was dropped and 7 was let out early for community service. He told 6 he was coming for him 6 months later.... 6 was so terrified he didn't know what to do... he was living in fear... eventually he commited suicide by jumping off a cliff just off the coach of Palm Beach into the pacific ocean. His body was never found His family didnt get to say good bye... This is why 6 was afraid of 7

thumb_up thumb_down -9

Name an American born white man in the NBA. Thats right, you cant

thumb_up thumb_down -12

How many Jews can you fit into a car? Well, it depends on how many Jews there are and what kind of car it is.

thumb_up thumb_down -9

Me: Why are red onions actually purple..? Dad: I don't know Sister: *sarcastic* Well, Why is it rainy in London? Me: ....Because that's the weather pattern.

thumb_up thumb_down +15

What did the woman say to her husband after he came home from a late night of drinking? Nothing, because the last time she did, she got her ass beat.

thumb_up thumb_down +42

What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? Dieing in a hole.

thumb_up thumb_down -33

whats worse than being raped by a giant scorpion getting raped by 2 giant scorpions

thumb_up thumb_down +20

what do you do with a fat little chug...kick em in the guts

thumb_up thumb_down +4

what's worse than the Holocaust. Finding two worms in your apple.

thumb_up thumb_down +13

What did the little orphan boy get for Christmas? Nothing because he had died six months prior to Christmas due to the horrible living conditions of the orphanage.

thumb_up thumb_down -139

Two Japanese men walked out of a bar. They drowned.

thumb_up thumb_down +1

woman's rights

thumb_up thumb_down -11

What did one jew say to the other jew? Want some pizza?

thumb_up thumb_down +5

Have you tried Ethiopian food? -no -well it's really good

thumb_up thumb_down -22

What do you call a women with two black eyes? Someone trapped in the cycle of violence that is domestic abuse. The few friends and family members she still speaks with tell she should leave. They don't know about the last time she threatened to leave him, when he held a gun to her throat and screamed "You try an leave me I'll kill you and your precious god damn babies!" Now she suffers silently for fear of what he might do to her family, but is increasingly worried about the way her husband has begun looking at their 13 year old daughter. Every night she kneels at the foot of her bed and prays for death, over the sounds of her own sobbing and her husbands drunken rage. Also she is a slow learner.

thumb_up thumb_down +4

what is worse than finding a dead worm in an apple? Obama being elected a second time

thumb_up thumb_down -28

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops