what did the blind man get for christmas? Cancer.....

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yo mama is so fat she has more body mass than a skinny person

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Why did elmo jump of the cliff caus he wa depresed

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Whats black and smells like white paint? A) Black paint!

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What did the muffin, say to the other muffin? Nothing. Because muffin's are inanimate objects, therefore incapable of speech, or any other sentient action. They baked quietly until the man who was baking them came to the conclusion they were fit for consumption, devoured them, and went on with his day.

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Why did the plane crash? Because the pilot was a loaf of bread.

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An English ship lands in the New World and offers to trade with the natives. The ship actually carried foreign diseases that the natives had no immunity to, and they all died.

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What do you call an african american child that hasn't eaten in a week? hungry.

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Two Guys walk into a bar; the second one should have seen it coming.

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Why was six afraid of seven? Because seven had a serious alcohol problem that gave him violent tendencies.

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pleas help someone is in my house i think hes trying to kill me i'm not even joking.

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Why couldn't the blonde have children? She had pelvic inflammatory disease.

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American Idol

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mental kid

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What did the black man do with the white mans stolen bike? He returned it after finding it outside a local shopping mall.

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amy mcguire is soo amazing! i love her

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How do you say the weekend in French? The weekend in French.

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Roses Are Red...Rolo's Are Round....Pull Down Your Pants And Let's Down!

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What did the Chinese restaurants do with dogs that wander into the kitchen? Kept them as pets.

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Steven hawking walks into a bar. a.w j.p

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God saw himself. Finally, proof.

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Why did the black man get arrested? Because he was in possession of powder cocaine, which is a schedule I narcotic in the United States. This incident probably would not have happened if an end was put to the war on drugs, which is notorious for disproportionately targeting blacks and other minority groups, even though whites are statistically more likely to use such substances.

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A dog walks into the local newspaper to place an ad. The dog writes; "woof woof, woof woof woof." Receptionist: You know you can ad another two woofs for the same price? Dog: Well that wouldn't make any sense at all?

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A handless Asian boy was riding his bike through the park with some friends. One of his friends puts his arms in the air and yells "Look! No hands!" The handless boy rides his bike home, crying and thinking about how one day he would like to say, "Look! No hands!" without people getting nauseous.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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