Why did the teenager turn in his work on time? He chose not to procrastinate.

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You know what me and Bill Cosby have in common? Katie..

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To mama's so fat that her escape velocity in her surface exceeds 3*10^8 m/s

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What do you call a black man from Germany? A Germ.

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What's the difference between a teacher and a train? A lot.

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Yeah, Eliza, its me, its so strange, you are the only one I remember from highschool, I was worried you had forgotten about me, anyway, yeah type as if you where speaking to him, and dont worry, I know I could not keep a secret back then, and I told Nero, so and he promised me he would kindly break my fingers if I told anyone, besides I dont do that anymore trust me.

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what looks like a bananna but is blue a blue bananna

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Jim and Larry work together. Jim works hard, and Larry is a bit of a prankster. One day, Jim is having a rather rough day, and Larry looks to cheer him up with a good-natured joke. Knowing that Jim's wife prepares dinner for him every night of the week, he calls her and tells her that their boss has decided to pay for a dinner out, that she should take the day off and just get ready for Jim to come home and pick her up. Larry will later follow up by calling a pizza delivery place and having them send a special no hard feeling message with two large delicious pizzas. He forgets to call the pizza delivery man until later that night, after which it's too late and he thinks "I'll just explain the joke to Jim tomorrow." And goes peacefully to sleep. Arriving home and finding that dinner is not prepared, Jim savagely beats his wife.

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Q. How many babies does it take to paint a room? A. Depends on how hard you throw them.

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Joesph Triphook.

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You're momma's so fat, that I just wanna go over there and make hot passionate love to her. What? I'm a chubby chaser.

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What do you get when you cross a joke and a rhetorical question?

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TIMMY

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A priest and a small child enter a bar. The bartender takes his son back from the priest, paying him $30 for his exemplary babysitting services.

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What is funnier then 25 9/11

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what did the cheese say to the other cheese nothing cheese can't talk

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What's funnier than an anti-joke? Sarcasm.

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Can you help jack Off. The elephant?

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What do astronauts do if the want a party? They planet

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What do you call a man in front of three trains that have explosives tied to them and that are making amazingly loud noises? An idiot who obviously can't identify danger and probably had a childhood injury that cause his life to be ruined forever most likely cause by an evil uncle.

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How many dead babies fit into a bathtub? 23

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What did the white man do when he got a black eye? He returned it to the crazed gentleman who sent it to him.

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Why did the boy cross the road? He was visiting his dying grandmother at the hospital.

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What happenend after the chicken tried to cross the road? a KFC opend

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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