Roses are red, violets are blue, roses are red, violets are blue, roses are red, violets are blue, get out of the garden it's time for lunch.

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What did the Pedophile say to the small girl? I have served my sentence and been successfully rehabilitated. Please continue playing out in public without fear of being sexually assaulted.

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What's worse than Gordon Brown's face? George Bush.

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What did the boy with no arms and no legs get for his birthday? a new bike.

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two men are having a conversation a third man walks what does he do? patiently waits as to not seem rude.

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You know whats funny about 9/11? Nothing.

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What do all of these jokes have in common? They're not funny. You see, the definition of an anti-joke is a "type of indirect humor that involves the joke-teller delivering something which is deliberately not funny, or lacking in intrinsic meaning. The audience is expecting something humorous, and when this does not happen, the irony itself is of comedic value." As this is a page full of anti-jokes, we know to expect the unfunny - thus robbing us of the experience of an anti-joke.

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An Asian woman is driving home from work and arrives in 30 minutes, which is strange because it normally does not take that long but she left during rush hour and the traffic was very bad at the time.

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What do you call a dog that's having a stroke? An emergency animal hospital.

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What's similar about a fish and an eagle? They can both fly, except for the fish.

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So a Quadriplegic walks into a bar.....

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How do you confuse a blond? Paint your self green and throw forks at her.

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Why did the little girl walk into the wall? Because she was blind.

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What's worse than a dead baby? What a sick question. Most would argue that nothing is worse than the death of an infant.

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What did the legless veteran get for christmas, The same grenade that blew up his legs.

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How do you describe a cranky rapist? Cranky and rapist

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dude ur such a bon of a sitch

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An Irishman, a German, a Jew, and a Mexican walk into a bar...... the Irishman is named designated driver and all four have a safe and enjoyable evening.

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If Abraham Lincoln were alive today, he'd be really really old.

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How many omish people did it take to screw in a lightbulb.

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What do a blueberry and a raspberry have in common? They are both commonly used in parfaits.

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Why did Hayden Bryant walk down the street? Because he can, dont doubt Hayden Bryant.

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Two nuns are in a bathtub, one nun turns to the other and says "where's the soap". The other nun replies "it does, doesn't it".

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why was the black man in jail? He stole food from a store due to the fact that his family was very poor and could not afford to fend for themselves.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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