One day, Jimmy didn't wake up.

What's worse than biting into an apple and finding a worm? Biting into a worm and finding an apple.

Cry me a river. Then build a bridge and become a structural engineer.

Why was Helen Keller a bad driver? Because she was blind and deaf which impairs the ability to register sights and sounds necessary to operate an automobile.

A priest and a prostitute are sitting next to each other on a bus. The priest asks her what she does, and she says "I sell my body to strange men." The priest then explains to her about Christianity, and she gives up her ways and becomes a devout Christian.

What did the slave say to its master? Nothing meanwhile he and his family had terminal cancer and were worked without pay for 20 years before dying fro, multiple cases of AIDS and infections within thier lungs and mouths.

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Q: What did the Catholic man say in response to the gay man asking what he likes to do? A: golf

How do you stop a clown from laughing? Hit him in the face with an ax.

Ask me if i'm a serial killer Are you a serial killer? Yes and I killed your family

What's the difference between my car and a pile of dead babies? You can't eat my car.

Roses are red. Violets are blue.

What do you say to a man who isnt funny You're not fuuny

So a horse walks into a bar. The rancher immediately contacted medical help, and with a little teamwork, the horse was treated and revived.

Why did robin get in the batmobile? Batman told him to

Want to hear the best joke? Your life :,( i think i hate you?

why couldn't the little girl play on the swing? Matty Russel was chasing her

What's the difference between a black guy and a bench. A bench is wooden while a black guy has a human body composed of mostly water.

What's long, black, and the tip is shaped like a mushroom? A mushroom.

Yo mamas so fat she hates her life and the example she sets for her children.

How did sarah break her arm? She was in a tragic car accident. An ambulance arrived and quickly rushed her to the hospital where she was cared for by medical professionals.

What's the best part of having sex with a twelve year old? Watching them cry when they prosecute against you.

What did the rapist say before the little girl got in the van? Get in the van

Who invented chocolate? I don't know! Keep it to yourself.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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