whats the difference between a baby and a watermelon ones a live the other isnt

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This one time at band camp....

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your mumma so fat she ate a horse and she still had room for dinner

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A mushroom walks into a bar, the bartender says, "We don't serve your kind." the mushroom asked why, the Bartender said, "Because your under aged"

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What's worse than the Holocaust? Six Million Jews.

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So, this guy walks into the doctor's and says: "Doctor, it hurts when I poke my leg like this." The doctor says: "Yes, you've shattered both your kneecaps. You'll never walk again."

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What's green and has wheels? Grass, I lied about the wheels.

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roses are red violets are blue some poems are good and some don't

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A Polar Bear walks into a bar and says to the barman: "Barman! Give me a whiskey and ............................................................coke." The barman says: "Why the big pause?" to which the Polar bear replies: "Well uhm my father had big paws"

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Your mom.

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Why couldn't dracula's wife get to sleep? She had insomnia.

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I like my 40's like I like my women, in ABUNDANCE.

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A man walks into a bar. He drinks.

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A mexican and a black man are in a car. Who's driving? the black man

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What is the way to a man's heart? Through his stomach. With a knife. Then then go up a little.

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Doctor, I've caught a cold. Take a Halls.

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Shelly tells Rob to go home... Thats what she said

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what did the food critic say when he was handed a snickers? I'm allergic to peanut butter

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guess what no i know what your thinking, its NOT chickenbutt. its that tomorrow i have a math test. that sucks.

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What do you call a Fish without the I? Astyanax mexicanus, or the Blind Cave variant of the Mexican tetra

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What does a person and a tree have in common? You can knock them down if you hit them repeatedly with an axe.

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i was in bed with a girl recently and she said to me 'I want tonight to be magical', so afterwards i disappeared.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because it had a gun to its head

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Q: Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? A: Because it died. Q: Why did the dog fall out of the tree? A: Because it was tied to the monkey.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops