What's the difference between a porcupine and a BMW? A porcupine has it's pricks on the outside. A BMW doesn't have pricks on it's bodywork, for a multitude of reasons: - it would increase the coefficient of drag, causing an increase in fuel consumption - the pricks would fall foul of pedestrian safety regulations

A man felt a pain in his stomach. He went to the doctor.

Q: What did little Jimmy get his grandfather for Christmas? A: Nothing his grandfather died on Thanksgiving

Roses are red Violets are red Trees are red Shrubs are red HOLY SHIT! MY YARD IS ON FIRE!

What did the towel say to the other towel? Nothing, there was no topic of conversation.

Roses are red Violets are blue Sunflowers are yellow Wanna have sex?

What's green fury has 4 legs, and if it fell out of a tree it would kill you. A pool-table

How do you make a Flamingo cry? Hit it with a sledgehammer.

Why did the chicken cross the road? Fruit loops.

A black guy wearing a mask runs into a store, points his gun at the cashier, steals some money and runs out. The police start an investigation the following morning

What was funny about the Halocast? Nothing, thousands of innocent people died

Why did the chicken cross the road? It just didn't.

What did the hedgehog say to the beaver? Nothing, they can't talk.

What did batman say to robin before they got in the car Get in the car

What's the difference between a pile of dead babies and a ferrari? -I don't have a ferrari in my garage.

the blue man livedin the blue house the black man in the black house the white man in the white house but who lived in the white house ,not the white man barack obama

Hey guys wanna here a joke? Never mind it was a gay joke but f**k it.

Yo mom is so stinky that when she gets in a room every one leaves the room

Q: How man Jews can you fit in a box? A:if your German than you tell me.

A man said to a performer performin in a concert,"Go break a leg!". The performer did not respond because he is perfoming.

In particle-joke physics, the antijoke is the extension of the concept of the antiparticle to the joke, where the antijoke is composed of antiparticles in the same way that the normal joke is composed of particles. Furthermore, mixing jokes and antijokes can lead to the annihilation of both, in the same way that mixing antiparticles and particles does.The result of antijoke meeting jokes is an explosion.[1]

Two girls are sitting quietly.

A woman's opinion

Q: why did Suzy fall off the swing? A: she had no arms. Knock knock! Who's there? Not Suzy.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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