Bob was in trouble. He forgot his wedding anniversary. His wife was really angry. She told him "Tomorrow morning, I expect to find a gift in the driveway that goes from 0 to 200 in 6 seconds and it better be there!!" The next morning he got up early and told his wife to come to the driveway. He quickly pulled out a .44 magnum and murdered her violently.

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What's big, wet and yellowish-green at midnight? I don't know. That's why I'm asking.

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this website is non-operational.

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Q: What's blue, red, and circular? A: I lied about the blue, and... uh... the red and circular part too, but everything else is true. It is an ipod touch.

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What do you call a black man with a peg leg? Disabled

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Q: Why did Steve fall out of the tree A: He was raking the leaves

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Why did the man crossed the busy road? Because he was sick of life.

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I'm typing this one handed... ... Because I'm an amputee.

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How can you help Sally who is casually gets beaten by her farther every day? Just give £3 a month to the NSPCC

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My milkshake brings all the boys to the yard. I guess I make a good milkshake.

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Q: Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? A1: he was shot. A2: he died A3: the forest was being cut down and he got into a machine and was shredded to pieces A4: he fell asleep

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lol im s0 gut at spelign at engrish N u laughd n liekd diZ funi joek XDD u most LUV LE MEMEZ n EMOtikons Lol (^-^) y u guyz so st00p1d at math Wtf???!?!? 1+1=8 i m soooo smurt hahaha I <3 warrior cats n dance 2 gangnum stail wile masturbatin 2 swagbois le raeg comicz ;3!! . And now you are dying of cancer.

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Your mom is so fat...

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Why are the black people in Africa dying? Because the poverty rate is high and they don't have enough money to by simple things like medicine and mosquito nets to prevent AIDS, Malaria, and other infectious diseases.

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Why did the the dog not eat its food? Because the night before the dog had gotten serious disease and lost appetite

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Two hippos are in a lake with water up to their eyes. One of them then says, "i keep thinking it's tueday"

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What's the only thing better than winning a gold medal in the special olympics? Not being retarded.

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What happened when Aladdin rubbed his lamp? It got slightly cleaner.

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Why did Lady Gaga arrive at the Grammy's in an egg? Because she was born that way.

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Whats funnier than 24.....25

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what do you call a grammatically incorrect horse? An horse

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? It died. Why did the second monkey fall out of the tree? It was tied to the first one.

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What do you call a black man that has just gotten out of jail? A former criminal who has served his time in prison and is now trying to redeem himself by becoming a respectable member of his community

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What's worse than 50 dead babies stapled to trees? 47 dead babies stapled to trees (it's better if it's a nice, round number.)

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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