What's Green and has Wheels? Ian Leighton... I LIED ABOUT THE GREEN

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Golf.

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How do Helen keller's parents punish her? They sternly reprimand her for her misdeeds.

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Q: why was the women out of the kitchen? A: Probably to partake in one of her many hobbies.

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A duck walks into a bar. Animal control is promptly called and the duck is released in a nearby park.

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Whats red and cant fly a plane. An apple.

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How do you call blond girl with no arms and no legs ? A victim of a tragic car accident.

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A blonde, a brunette, and a redhead walk into a bar. They order a few drinks, chat, and walk out.

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What is 69? A two digit number.

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What do you get when you cross a Mexican and an African? A baby.

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What's red and silly? A blood clot

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What do Laura Bush and 9/11 have in common? George Bush did them.

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Knock, knock Who's there? I'm there.

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Your momma's so fat when she walks into a restaurant she orders salad.

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Q.) How do you fit a baby into a bowl? A.) With a blender! Q.) How do you get it out? A.) With Tostitos! -Sebastian and Chris (aka 100 and Zelot) (we did not make this joke, we just had to share it)

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Why was the interracial marriage unsuccessful? Because several social factors have challenged the couple as they live in a rural part of the South and interracial couples generally aren't as accepted in those areas as in progressive city centers.

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Executioner: Would you like to make a statement? Mr Murderer: Yes, I would love to sing a song. Executioner: Very well. Begin. Mr Murderer: There were 6 billion in the bed, and the little one said roll over, roll over. So they all rolled over and one fell out...

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because that's where the oncologist's office is.

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Donald Duck walks into a drug store and asks the lady behind the counter for a bag of condoms. So the lady says, "Sure thing sir, would you like me to put that on your bill"? Donald says," THIT(Shit)NO, I'LL THUFFOCATE! (Suffocate)

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Knock knock Whose there? you you who you know who you are

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what do you call 4 black people pushing a car uphill? unfortunate

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why did the kid die? his mom shot him

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What did the one alcoholic say to the other? We are both alcoholics

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Why was the blonde fired from the M &M's factory? Her Masters degree in electrical engineering made her overqualified for the job she had.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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