How much wood could a woodchuck chuck if a woodchuck could chuck wood? I do not know because it depends on the woodchuck; however, if some statistical evidence is gathered on the average amount of wood a woodchuck could chuck you most likely would get a close answer, considering that the statistical research was not flawed.

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Knock knock. Who's there? I am. I am who? I am pregnant.

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Who's the cutest girl in the world? Claire Seiter.

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Why was the dog sweating? It was locked in a car on a hot day.

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Wow, that is one of the things I would think I would react all bad to, but that`s, a strangely attractive quality in you.

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Why did Mia fall off of Lucy's bike? Because Lucy didn't like Mia and shot her in the face.

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Why didn't the boy finish his homework? He was in a coma.

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Hey "Oren" its Red, sorry but I got to go now. How you been doing? Kinda missed you over here. So you actually care about how you sound now?

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A girl walked into a bar and sat next to a man. She asked what he was drinking. He said something that makes you fly. She didn't believe him. He then went up to the roof, jumped off and walked back in the front door. She got the drink then tried to jump off the roof, and died on impact. The bartender said to the man "You're a real asshole when you're drunk superman."

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why did suzie fall off the swing? she had no arms why did suzie get hit by a bus? she was blind knock knock whos there? not suzie.

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What do you call a man with no arms and no legs in the middle of the oceon? Dead in the water.

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What did James say when he couldn't find his car? "My name's James".

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What is the most hardest math known to man kind? 1+1=?

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throbbing slobber

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What did the little boy with cancer get for his birthday .............. Nothing because he died before his birthday

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Why did the plumber kill his family? He wasn't a very good plumber.

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knock knock hold on im takin a poop!

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Roses are grey, Violets are grey. I'm colour blind, It's a very depressing situation.

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Just admit it. one time in ur life u pretended that the floor was lava and the only way to survive was on the couch.

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So a pirate walks into a bar. He sits down, and orders a drink. After giving the pirate a drink, the bartender looks down and notices that there is a steering wheel on the pirate's penis. "Sir, are you aware that there is a steering wheel on your penis?" The bartender asked. "Arrrrrrr, it's driving me crazy!" The pirate replied. "Well you should probably get that checked out soon," said the bartender, "It looks very uncomfortable and could be dangerous to your health...not to mention your penis is out in the open." "Yes, you are probably right," the pirate agreed. He proceeded to get a ride from a friend to the nearest hospital, for drinking and driving can be dangerous, and steering wheels on penises are not safe.

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Why did Princess Diana die? Because she deserved it!

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Roses are red Violets are blue I have a gun And you don't,

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What did the father give to his daughter? AIDS.

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Whats more annoying than listening to another arrow in the knee joke? bink2w32.dll is missing from your computer.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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