What did the blonde say to the other blonde? "Hey, do you want to get something to eat?"

thumb_up thumb_down +10

The gay man came out of the closet.....Not that he wanted the world to know about his alternative lifestyle but because he is fairly wealthy and keeps his trousers on hangers in the rear of his walk in closet.

thumb_up thumb_down -7

What's worst then a road kill? Multiple road kils.

thumb_up thumb_down +3

What's the difference between a baby and an onion? One is a vegetable and the other is a human being.

thumb_up thumb_down +27

Q: Why did the wihte man buy a burger? A: cuz he was hungry

thumb_up thumb_down +1

Why did Ben Franklin Invent Bifocals? He's a jive turkey.

thumb_up thumb_down -4

WHATS BALCK AND YELLOW AND UNDER WATER? A BUMBLE BEE IN A SUBMARINE.... YEAH YOU BETTER #$%^ING LAUGH YOU HOMO

thumb_up thumb_down +40

What kind of a prediction is THAT?

thumb_up thumb_down -2

what's worse then death? finding that your adopted, no one loves you and you mother raped you at the tender age of five.

thumb_up thumb_down -10

There were three men named manner, poop, and shut up. they all were mad fun of in middle school and ended up hating their parents for giving them such retarded names.

thumb_up thumb_down -13

Yo mama so fat even Dora couldn't explore her!

thumb_up thumb_down +29

what did the postman say to the dog, nothing he doesnt speak dog....... but his mother in law does.

thumb_up thumb_down -41

why did Tommy fall of his bike? because he was getting raped by a walrus

thumb_up thumb_down +120

An Unicorn walks into a club, the bartender promised to quit drugs and thanks to that his family didn't fall apart and he lived happily till he was 89 when he passed away surrounded by loved ones.

thumb_up thumb_down -7

There is a hawk and a squirrel sitting in a tree. a farmer walks by with a strange package so the hawk turns to the squirrel and says nothing because he is an animal and incapable of speech, he then eats the squirrel because he is a bird of prey.

thumb_up thumb_down +3

children burning

thumb_up thumb_down

A Mexican guy, a black guy, and an ISIS member walk into a bar. The black and Mexican men, realizing the potential danger in the situation quickly exit the bar and alert the proper authorities. $

thumb_up thumb_down +1

I began as a dreamer, then I became a visionary, then I saw my dream come true, until it shattered us all. Do you believe that perhaps, there are people out there, trying to stop the world from reaching a better age?

thumb_up thumb_down -4

What's the coolest place to be in the solar system? Uranus.

thumb_up thumb_down +4

Lacrosse

thumb_up thumb_down +17

Why did Shrek eat the onions? Anyone who has seen the Shrek films would know that Shrek never mentions anything about eating onions. In the first movie, Shrek and donkey have a conversation in which he compares himself to an onion, but the scene lasts maybe a minute and never again does Shrek mention onions in any way, shape, or form. For whatever reason, this one scene has turned onions into the strongest signature icon associated with Shrek.

thumb_up thumb_down +22

7,7,7,7,7,7,7,7,7,7,7,7,7,8

thumb_up thumb_down +21

roses are red violets are blue pornhub is down ya mums facebook will do

thumb_up thumb_down -11

Q:If a tree falls in the forest and nobody is here to hear it, will it make a noise A:That Philosopher probably had a lot of herbal tea in the morning

thumb_up thumb_down -19

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops