What's the difference between a nickel and a dime? Five cents.

Why did the chicken cross the road? To get to the other... Uh oh. A car just ran it over.

*Knock knock* "Who's there?" "Would you mind turning your music down a bit please? I have reports to write."

There were 3 women, a blonde, a brunette, and a redhead. They were driving with a gorilla when suddenly the car crashed. All the women died but only the gorilla survived. The police investigated with the gorilla and did some simple sign language. The police, using hand motions, asked the gorilla what each individual female was doing before the car crashed. The gorilla ran away for reasons unknown.

Nero here, nice to see you guys again, now you know why my babbling has been excessive (and pissed at the comments below, but now that the pills are working I am calm) Anyway, yeah point Zero is my "world" now, and its been thriving under my values (something I feared would just work on paper, and if so such beliefs would all been for nothing) As for hero... Well insert something like "I am no hero, I just do what is right" or something cheesy, or... Well, thats what I do really... Since nobody uses this site Ill extend the time you "former followers" can chat, as I got some nice stuff to share, and might just share a bit before I pass away (nah, but I will sleep when tired), I got a lot to do tomorrow.

Why did people run from the chicken? Because they didnt want to get bit by the chicken

What is black and white and red all over? Yemen's national flag.

Knock knock Who's there? Hi I'm John from the jehovah witness society down the street and I'd love to talk to you about your beliefs! Would you like a pamphlet?

roses are red violets are blue you smell like poo I F*****G HATE YOU!

What did the picture say to the man? Don't frame me

A cat walks into a bar, the bartender says "pussy?"

why did the chicken cross the road? because he wanted to!

A fat man orders a pizza. Then after eating it, he gets a eart attack due to his high cholesterol and lack of exercise

What did the aliens say when they first landed on planet Earth? We've come back for Anthony Davis.

A dyslexic man walks into a bra. He is promptly arrested for sexual harassment.

hi

why did the f a g perform fellatio? because he was a sick c unt

Q-whats worse than getting shot. A-getting shot twice

Whats Green and Smells Like Grass? Grass

Why does Gandalf have special powers? Because Dumbledore died.

Why can't Larry drive? Because he doesn't have his license, and his temps expired!

Who were the fastest readers of all time? The victims of 9/11. They went through over 87 stories in less than 2 1/2 minutes.

What is the most important thing to have during a zombie apocalypse? Oxygen.

Why did the Blonde say something stupid? Because she is stupid

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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