What did the man's ex-wife told him after their divorce? "Build a bridge and get over did" And so he did because hes a contractor that specialized in structures spanning and providing passage over a gap or barrier, such as a river or roadway

thumb_up thumb_down -5

A man walks into a bar, and says ouch.

thumb_up thumb_down +5

Why did the girl say 'baa'? Because she was a lamb.

thumb_up thumb_down +20

Send creepy emails to this email address: matt.harrington@highlandcatholic.org

thumb_up thumb_down +2

the danced cus they were young, they danced cus they were free, but mostly the danced cus they needed to pee

thumb_up thumb_down +4

Why didn't the parachute open? nevermind

thumb_up thumb_down -22

How do you make a baby stop crying? Drown it in vinegar.

thumb_up thumb_down -16

Why did the man burp? Because gases escaped from his stomach and came out of his mouth.

thumb_up thumb_down -37

Q:How many dead babies can you fit in a bathtub? A:Depends on the volume of said tub.

thumb_up thumb_down -16

2 men walk into a bar without thier shirts. They get kicked out. 2 women walk into a bar without thier shirts They got beaten almost to death Why? The men dressed up as women, and every hated them so much they beat the almost to death when 2 cops walk into that bar, see the men dressed up as women and they too beat them. Little do they all know that the men disguised as women are really secret goverment agents looking into a drug deal. The drug dealers got away and now we have 2 people sueing the police department and drugs on the street again. Oh yeah I almost forgot: I made this up so if you read it you're going to die withing the next 100000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000 years. I gurantee it. If you dont the men in white coats are going to do extremely painful tests on you and you just might die so then no one will care and maybe get onto thier lives again. Why did I right this? It hasnt happened to me so I dont know If you tell me I will give you something more valueble than gold. Want to know what it is? TELL ME FIRST!!!!

thumb_up thumb_down -21

Person 1: Why can't a T-Rex clap? Person 2: BECAUSE THEIR ARMS ARE TOO SMALL! Person 1: No, because they are extinct dumbass

thumb_up thumb_down +21

Why did the chicken cross the road? How the hell should I know I'm not a mind reader.

thumb_up thumb_down -5

Knock knock. Who's there? Interrupting cow. Interrupting cow who? I didn't do it right.

thumb_up thumb_down -9

a guy walks into a bar. he buys several drinks, ends up drunk, and crashes into a coffee shop with a goat in the backseat.

thumb_up thumb_down +31

What's Kanye West's goal in life? To dash the hopes and dreams of Taylor Swift on national television.

thumb_up thumb_down -6

knock knock who's there Bob I don't know you Bob and if you don't get off my porch this minute i'm calling the authorities.

thumb_up thumb_down +4

what do you call an icy road? dangerous.

thumb_up thumb_down +20

Four homosexuals walk into a bar and theres only one bar stool left how do they all sit down on that one bar stool. They flip the bar stool around and sit down all together

thumb_up thumb_down -2

Why did your mom fall off the swing? I shot him.

thumb_up thumb_down +5

A man is walking down the street and sees a women sat on the pavement crying, he walks over to her and asks "what's wrong?" to which the women replies "it doesn't matter" the women then walks away as she did not want to share private information with a stranger.

thumb_up thumb_down -21

Who in Tyrone's black family gave him presents on christmas? Not his dad.

thumb_up thumb_down -1

Why doesn't Mexico have an Olympic team? They do, they just choose not to compete certain years.

thumb_up thumb_down +19

Michael Jackson walks into a daycare center.

thumb_up thumb_down +26

Anti jokes gives me cold sores

thumb_up thumb_down +27

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops