What's green and fuzzy and will kill you if it falls out of tree? A Pool Table

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What's brown and sticky? Poop.

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Why did the road cross the chicken? Well, according to Einstein's Theory of Special Relativity, if you and the chicken were to cross the road simultaneously, your perspective, relative to the chicken, would remain unchanged. Therefore, the road would appear to move underneath the chicken, which would seem to be performing some style of polka dance.

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Why can't Vampires go out in the sunlight? Because they don't exist.

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how do you kill a giraffe? you don't.

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What is worse then falling into a lava pit? Nothing you idiot.

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My friend is a famous actor. Fooled you! I have no friends.

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what is bad about being a black jew? you have to sit in the back of the oven

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Whats long and black? The line at KFC.

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why did hitler hate the jews... because the nazies had to pay the gas bill

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So you're floating down a river on a two story canoe. How many pancakes does it take to cover a dog house? Four because snakes have no legs.

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What's black and white, and red all over ? A penguin in a blender.

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What's brown and sticky A stick

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She look like Ms. Universe and I'm bout to be in that black hole

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A horse walks into a bar and the barman asks: "why the long face?" The horse, being a horse and thus being incapable of comprehending the complexities of conversation said nothing, and shit all over the floor.

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I have three heads and nine eyes, what am I? I'm a liar.

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What is worse than an 11 year old getting raped You getting caught

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Q: What do you call a kid with no arms and an eye patch? A: His name.

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What did the plant say to the human. Nothing.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? To go to the buchter.

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Person 1: I need an adult.... Person 2: I am an adult. Person 1: I need another adult... Person 2: My friend's an adult too. Person 1: I need a third adult Person 2: GOD UR NEEDY!

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DILDO!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

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Abe Lincholn had a son :) But he died |:

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Why was the dog crying? Because his owners hated him and called him stupid.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops