Why was Joey bad at playing the trumpet? He had no fingers.

If you have 12 apples and I have 12 ice cubes how many pancakes fit on a roof? Purple because aliens don't wear hats.

How many dead babies does it take to paint a wall? Dead babies can't paint.

What's the number one killer in America? Death.

meh

Why did the chicken cross the road? Because it got out of it coop and there was something shinny on the other side of the street.

What did the orphan get christmas? CANCER

Why did the plane crash? The pilot was a loaf of bread.

What do you call an amazing person Good

You're smart... And I can tell a joke.

What's black, white, and red all over? A penguin in a blender.

Roses are blue Violets are red Is that really What I just said?

How many militant feminist does it take to change a lightbulb? 2, one to change the bulb and another to suck my dick.

What's green and has wheels? Boogers on a skateboard.

what do you call a black man falling off a cliff holy shit

alert("Hello");

why did the duck cross the road? because his d**k was stuck in the chickens a**....

Who are you texting? YOUR MOTHER.

How do you make an anti-joke offensive? Add racism to it.

Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? It was dead Why did the second monkey fall out of the tree? It was stapled to the first Why did the third monkey fall out of the tree? Peer pressure

What did the elephant say to the whale? Nothing, neither can talk and they live in very different biomes.

Swag.

what do lions and potatoes have in common? They each drive a sports car, wait neither the lion nor the potato drive a sports car. Sorry to waste your time with this joke that seemed to not really have a meaning or a clever punchline.

Why was the orphan crying? Because his parents are dead.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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