What happens when you mix breed a cat and a human?? .. you get arrested and get raped by your fellow prisoners DONT do it!

thumb_up thumb_down +1

How do you have problems paying your monthly mortgage if you live in a box emmanuel

thumb_up thumb_down -3

A Chinese man... pulling another Chinese man in one of those carts behind him.

thumb_up thumb_down -17

What's black and blue and hates sex? The unfortunate child in a pedophile's basement who the police have yet to find.

thumb_up thumb_down -10

A horse walks into a bar and the bartender asks, "Why the Long face" The horse then storms out of the bar, wondering why every bartender must ask him that.

thumb_up thumb_down +14

How many mice does it take to screw in a lightbulb? Just two, the mystery is how mice can get inside a lightbulb.

thumb_up thumb_down +11

Just so you are warned here folks, some of the jokes down here are really nasty, like you know... Antijokes... But luckily you got my family friendly stories about sex, incest, panties, grenades, dripping Meows, yeah... Regular family show stuff... IT HAPPENS TO US ALL! Right? Please tell me right? Riiight? Right? Yes? Phew, okay, for a moment I actually thought you where gonna tell me I was normal...

thumb_up thumb_down -25

What are astronauts called in Soviet Russia? Cosmonauts

thumb_up thumb_down +17

What's green and can read your mind? Nothing. Some people thinks the answer is a plant but don't listen to them because they are wrong.

thumb_up thumb_down +1

Stop with the 9/11 jokes guys. They're just plane stupid.

thumb_up thumb_down -12

Why did the baby stop crying? I hit him with a brick.

thumb_up thumb_down -7

What did the three best friends say to eachother? We are all best friends

thumb_up thumb_down +7

What is the difference between Whitney Houston and Elvis. They are dead. And it make people go boo hoo

thumb_up thumb_down +9

What's worse then a worm in your apple? When your apples a human

thumb_up thumb_down -23

What sits in the corner of room and gets smaller and smaller? A baby combing it's hair with a potato peeler

thumb_up thumb_down -6

Why couldn't the old lady take her Afghan Hound to the vet after the dog had been brutally harassed? She was dead.

thumb_up thumb_down -6

Q: what did 7 say to 11? A: weres every one else?

thumb_up thumb_down +27

whats worse then finding a worm in your apple? getting stranded on an island with your best friend and realizing several days later that you will have to eat him to survive. hours after eating your friend a boat saves you and now have to live the rest of your life knowing you ate somebody.................... oh and the Holocaust

thumb_up thumb_down -41

Ask me if I care. Do you care? No.

thumb_up thumb_down +2

Ask me if I'm a grapefruit. Are you a grapefruit? No.

thumb_up thumb_down +1

Wow you look beautiful in that picture..... Let me see your tits. Sorry, I thought I was still texting.

thumb_up thumb_down +17

why did the man have a hole in his face? because syphillis had eaten a hole in it

thumb_up thumb_down -7

What's more dangerous, a big rock or a small one? It doesn't matter. You can blame my mom for having me.

thumb_up thumb_down -38

what did the home less man get for chrismas? cancer.

thumb_up thumb_down -11

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops