This person shaved their head to gain attention. A klansman.

How did Hitler like his steaks? He didn't like steaks, he was a vegetarian.

two scientists walk into a bar. one says, "i want h2o." the other says, "i want h2o too." the bartender gives them both water and nobody dies because he is not irresponsible enough to give someone concentrated hydrogen peroxide as a drink.

Why did the man have a curiously-shaped scar on his cheek? He had been mauled by an owl as a child.

Q: Why did the black man drown? A: Because he couldn't swim.

marble

Why did the bird fall out of the sky? It had no wings.

A chicken walks into McDonalds. He never comes out because he got grilled, greased, and seasoned.

an average-looking woman walks into a bar. nobody really notices.

Why do people hate Jews? Because there is nothing to like about them

Micheal Jackson walks into a bar

A man went to his doctor and said, "Doctor, every time I hit my hand with a hammer, it hurts!" Then both him and his doctor died; so it didn't matter.

Q: why are kittens so cute? A: because god created them that way. go fourth and enjoy kittens.

Knock Knock? Who's There? Sgt Constable Ian. Sgt Constable Ian Who? It's Sgt Constable Ian - I'm here to see you about your alleged rape charges.

What is the difference between a cow and a human? A lot of things.

The duck says do you smell poop. Ya says the chicken, it wasn't me It was the turkey

What is the difference between a jew and a pizza? Jews are people, and are a nation and ethnoreligious group originating in the Israelites or Hebrews of the Ancient Near East. A pizza on the other hand is an Italian dish made up of cheese, bread sauces and multiple toppings.

In Capitalist America, bank robs you!

Today I wanted to make world peace.... So I killed everyone.

I AM FAGNETO! MASTER OF FAGNET! WELCOME TO FÅG! DIE X-FÅGGOT! XD Okay Fagneto`s roll me out of here, I am done with the super important last message to uh... You? No wait that sounds wrong, stop laughing you korean piece of... Seriously sorry I am drugged, you guys put enough valium in me to kill a cow, so please roll me out... I used to have a lot of korean friend you know, but then I killed them for being korea... seriously my fingers magically type shit when I am done, please roll me out of here, and fill that... Kundalini express? Is it me or did this get even more fagneto... Get me out of here now now now no

Why do black people have nightmares? Because we killed the only one with a dream.

Why did sally fall off the swing? She had no arms

I see London. I see France. Show me your boobs.

Why couldn't the Mexican man get a job? Because he was dead.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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