Q:What do you find in the middle of a pile of dead babies? A:Another dead baby!

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, I'm colorblind.

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A man walked into a doctors and said, “Doctor help! My arms have stopped working” to which the receptionist replied, “I’m not the doctor and you need to make an appointment.”

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dylan wishes he could come up with funny jokes. but that is impossible for a man trying to bat with a .5inch ****

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What happened when the black woman moved to the front of the bus? There were no seats available but everyone was very nice about it. She also asked for gum. Somebody did have gum. Which was nice.

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Why aren't there Olympics in Mexico? Idk Because everyone that can run jump or swim are already across the boarder.

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Q: What do Ethiopians eat at night? A: Nothing.

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What do you get if you cross a sheep with a kangaroo? Don't be ridiculous. First of all, scientifically this is near impossible and secondly, what use would a kangaroo with wool be? Sheepdogs would become obsolete and they would be a nightmare to shear. Imbecile.

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Remember how I made you hypnotically cum by poking your own nose last time? When I told you that hypnotic story about the astrologer and the brain surgeon? So you wet yet? Think about how easy its going to be for me when I take out Mr.Big and slap down your coffee table with it, yeah... Feels cozy down there does it not?

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What do you call a smart blond? There aren't any so there shouldn't be a name for it.

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brandon ya twwat

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What did the jacket say to the girl? Zip me up wait why am I talking

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What do you call a Muslim flying a plane A pilot.

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What smells like dead rats? Dead hamsters

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Q: why did the little boy fall off the swing? A: He had no arms Q: Why couldn't he get up? A: He died when he hit the ground

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What do you get if you convict a white man of murder? A black man in prison.

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So, there was two monkeys sitting in a bath tub one says "Hey, could you pass the soap?" the other says "what do I look like a typewriter?"

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What's the difference between Rebecca Black and your mom? Nope! Chuck Testa.

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What does a person say before they die? Whatever their last word is

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There was was 14 apples in a tree. And that's it.

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Waiter, there is a hydrogen conducting carbon nanotube in my soup. That is part of the special, sir.

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wanna hear a better joke? casey.

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you know why Michael J Fox makes the best milkshakes? no... but his milkshakes brings all the boys to the yard

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What's green and frolics in the forest? A flock of cucumbers.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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