Chuck Norris once walked into a strip club, and had quite a nice time indeed!

thumb_up thumb_down +10

Why Did the throw up He was sick

thumb_up thumb_down -17

Whats the difference........ Between a duck?

thumb_up thumb_down -3

your mom

thumb_up thumb_down -4

A homeless man is hungry. He then kills a college professor and has a nice dinner

thumb_up thumb_down -113

Two scientists walk into a bar. The first scientist says, "I'll have some H2O." The second scientist says, "I'll have H2O too." The bartender gives them both water, realizing that H2O2 is poisonous and that the second scientist must have simple worded his request poorly.

thumb_up thumb_down -8

How do you get a movie star to go out with you? Blackmail.

thumb_up thumb_down +41

A duct walks into a bar. The writer meant to write duck and then proceed to make a clever joke but instead a typo was made and a very unlikely occurence was writtern about considering air passages are not capable of walking and would most likely already be in the ceiling of the bar as too bring fresh air into the bar is important.

thumb_up thumb_down -2

What's big, red, and eats rocks? A big, red, rock eater.

thumb_up thumb_down +37

What is the difference between a black person and a pizza? Nothing, they both taste like chicken

thumb_up thumb_down +21

A man and a cucumber walk into a bar. They sit three seats away from each other and intermediately give nervous looks to one another. Finally the man stands up and declares "I hate bar jokes" and walks out.

thumb_up thumb_down +14

How do you confuse a terrorist? Speak another language other than Arabic

thumb_up thumb_down -41

A dog walks into a bar, animal control is called and he is put down as he is suffering from rabies.

thumb_up thumb_down +13

woman's rights

thumb_up thumb_down -12

They say "You are what you eat." In that case, I'm a pussy.

thumb_up thumb_down +7

A drunk man walks out of a bar, goes home and abuses his wife.

thumb_up thumb_down +4

Why did Sally fall off the swing-set? She had no arms. Knock-knock. Who's there? Not Sally.

thumb_up thumb_down +28

Wanna here a funny joke Oh right. You can't hear

thumb_up thumb_down -25

Yo mamas so fat,you know wht, i think she might die !!

thumb_up thumb_down -10

There was once a guy who was so crazy...he was sectioned.

thumb_up thumb_down -21

If a large bear falls out of a tree, why would a giraffe also eat the cheese?

thumb_up thumb_down

Roses are red, Violets are blue, I can't rhyme Refrigerator

thumb_up thumb_down -11

If a man shouts in a forest and there is no woman around to hear him, is he still wrong? He could be, he could not be. It really depends on what he says. The greater concern is that he's shouting alone in the forest. Either he's in trouble or he has a major psychology disorder.

thumb_up thumb_down +2

KNOCK! KNOCK! who knocks like that? all my friends break the door down...oh alright then ill answer i guess WHO IS IT? THE REAPER oh s*** dude! [panic face] NO ONES HOME? "In other news tonight, 2 local men found murdered in their living rooms, after looking up common joke style called antee joke. Police say the door was smashed in an obvious sign of forced entry. They seem to have just mysteriously had sudden heart attacks and fainted. heh heh...hey nancy....why did the chicken cross the road? [=< heh heh" "y" "because he thouroughly enjoyed darting out into traffic" "HAHAHAHAHAHAHA *GASP!* X.x dead face "NANCY! NANCY!.....well in other OTHER news ive just murdered nancy, and thats no joke." *runs*

thumb_up thumb_down -45

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops