Why did the chicken cross the road? It had places to be

If Jimmy has $5, and he finds $20 on the street, how much money does Jim have? None. He was mugged by a black man.

I'll be back. Please use the door.

When life gives you lemons make lemonade, when life gives you apples make apple juice, when life gives you cranberries make cranberrie juice and then when live gives you mangos, Eat them :)

I went to the bookstore to buy me a Where's Waldo book. I looked through the store and couldn't find it anywhere.... Well played waldo, well played.

what did batman say to robin to tell him to get in the car? get in.

womans rights

Uh... No? Listen, the other 2 people that bother using this "site" (excuse for one) would not give a damn, and if some world government are after us they wont find shit. What? If I said no you would hack this site? My mother can hack this site, thats what makes it so useful for us... SO PLEASE DO NOT TELL EEEEEEEEEVERYONE THAT MY MORALS AND SHIT ARE ALL CODES THAT NOBODY HAS THE BRAIN TO DECODE PLEASE <<<<<<<<< *Sarcasm detector goes off* Seriously though, nah, dont hack nor delete anything, I kinda like how I got some thumbs ups on the comment section where I shared about my mother finally dying and me feeling the world against me great etc blahblah, "Erica" and "Wizard" thumbed those up and are now with us (seriously Wizard? Geek somebody?)

Why did Little Jimmy never make it in the NBA? Because he died at age 6.

Why did the chicken cross the road? Rocky was chasing him

How did the girl cross the road? -She didn't, she died because she was blind and didn't see the "don't walk" sign.

what does chuck norris use to cut scissors? another scissor.

Why couldn't Ariel talk in the Little Mermaid? Someone slit her throat.

whats worse than getting in a car crash Heroshema

Yo mama's has so much acne, I decided to give her proactive.

Roses are grey Violets are grey Im a dog

So this blond chick walks into a bar, and orders a drink.

Nobody likes you ya noob! (-_-) *sniff* MAN YOU SMELL BAD

What did the dyslexic boy get for Christmas? A laptop. And he was very happy.

What is the difference between a rose and a grape? They are both purple.

What is worse than the holocaust Nothing it was fine with the Jews in camps burning and dying

America

Why couldn't Lucy get her driver's license? Because she has Cerebral Palsy!

A man walks into the corner of a table and bruises his leg. The bruise continues to be there for about 3 weeks.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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