Roses are blue Violets are red I got this backwards Carpets are nice

Why does Charlie Sheen do cocaine? Because his father was a poor role model and he's an unstable celebrity.

Paddy and Murphy are walking down the street, Paddy says to Murphy, "Alright Murphy? How's the kids?" Murphy says to Paddy, "Not bad, thanks."

Why was Blue looking for her clue. She was drugged by a stranger and ended up inside of Mailbox.

So this chick meets a guy at a bar. They never greet each other and the drive home sober.

It is the conjoining of the two possible outcomes of the interstellar and post modern possibilities of the pasta pudding god's niece's favorite colour after she falls off her bike whilst riding down a yellow slide after her twenty-seventh birthday when the two suns form a triangle in the night sky over the delta. Yes indeed that was good pudding.

What did King Tut say when he got scared? How would I know? It was over a thousand years ago.

Women's Rights

25

This sentence will not end the way you octopus.

A pope meets another one

Hitler had the right ideas, wne tupon it the wrong way.

Why do people play video games? Because audio games are not as fun.

A blonde, a brunette, and a redhead are stuck on a deserted island when a genie appears and offers each of them one wish. Before making any decisions on what to wish for, the discuss what the smartest choice is. They return to the genie. The brunette wishes to return home, as does the blonde. The redhead wishes to be able to walk again. The genie denies the wish because to walk again she would have to wish for two legs. The genie leaves and the redhead eventually dies of dehydration as she cannot move and the water that she reaches from the ocean contains salt which dehydrates her faster than the water hydrates her.

Two women were sitting in silence.

German sausage is the wurst

Why wasn't Johnny at school today? Because he died in childbirth.

Roses are red Roses are pink Roses are yellow Roses are white

the person who wrote 1 under me is gay

Why did the black man get drenched by a fire hose because he was on fire

Why was Veronica lying on the sidewalk? She was just in a drive-by shooting.

What do you get when you cross a Shake Weight with Parkinson's Disease? You get a sentence that doesn't explain the end of the joke and leaves you without any closure.

Why did Johnny fall off of the swing? The swing was defective. Knock, knock. Who's there? Johnny's lawyer.

how many people does it take to change a light bulb....... none..................its stilll bright

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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