What's green and goes 100 miles an hour? a green racing car

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Why can't Helen Keller drive? Because she's dead

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What do you call a deaf black man? Well, if you did not already know his name, you would first have to contact a member of his family, or a friend, and ask them, as even if you were able to communicate the question of 'what is your name?' to the man, it is well known that the speech of deaf people is nowhere near as clear as that of people who are able to hear.

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What did the banana say to the other banana? We're both marshmallows

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Why do Teenagers, mostly girls between the ages of 12-17 love Justin Bieber? Because he promotes himself worldwide and makes sure that girls know who he is thus creating a fan base that will be large enough to promote his career, which ensures him a safe financial future.

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What do you call a man with a black book? I don't know.

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How do you kill a dinosaur with a spoon? You cant because they are extinct creatures

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A black guy and an apple fall out of a tree, which one hits the ground first? They both hit the ground roughly at the same time, because the acceleration due to gravity is constant.

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69

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why cant little timmy ski? he was born without legs.

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What do u get when u lick chicken Answer- Your a retard if you did not figure it out it is obviously chicken taste DERP!

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what's green and has wheels? grass, i lied about the wheels.

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What did Abraham Lincoln say to his slaves? Nothing, Abraham Lincoln had no slaves.

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What do u get when you cross Napoleon and a stick of dynamite? A very bloody mess.

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What's better than getting to sleep in? Sex for the very first time.

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Why is Jesus not real? Because Chuck Norris is still alive.

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What do you get when you cross a polar bear and a vampire? A Vampire Polar Bear.

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How much wood could a woodchuck chuck if a woodchuck could chuck wood? I do not know because it depends on the woodchuck; however, if some statistical evidence is gathered on the average amount of wood a woodchuck could chuck you most likely would get a close answer, considering that the statistical research was not flawed.

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I'm Donald Trump! Wump wump wump! I won the battle but lost the war: I'm Donald Trump!

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That awkwad moment when a homeless man runs naked around a golf cource yelling hears the 19th hole bitches.

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What do you call a lesbian dinosaur? A fossil.

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Have you noticed when you see geese flying and they're in a V pattern, often one side will be longer than the other? Do you know why that is? There are more geese on that side.

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So there's A blonde, a brunette and a redhead at a lake. they all swim across and have a picnic at the other end.

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This is supposed to be an anti-joke.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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