asd

thumb_up thumb_down -139

Which came first, the chicken or the egg? Neither, many scientists believe that the first living organisms on Earth were single-celled, prokaryotic bacteria.

thumb_up thumb_down +8

"Why is Barney green and purple?" "Because the producers of the show decided to make him that way."

thumb_up thumb_down -1

Whats funnier than a Dead Baby in a bathtub? Nothing Thats as good as it gets!

thumb_up thumb_down +9

What is stupid, black and high? A stupid black kite.

thumb_up thumb_down +9

Why did little jimmy fall of the playground? He was blind and wasn't aware of his surroundings

thumb_up thumb_down -4

Why couldn't Helen Keller drive? She was a woman

thumb_up thumb_down -12

What is brown and sticky. Hot chocolate.

thumb_up thumb_down +14

Why shouldn't you try to pick up a live scorpion with your teeth? Because it could easily sting your face, or mouth.

thumb_up thumb_down +3

Why did the man visit 4chan? He heard about it from a coworker and was curious about what it was.

thumb_up thumb_down +12

What did the rake say to the shovel? Nothing, they're both inanimate objects.

thumb_up thumb_down -42

Who smells like urine and his da is a registered sex offender with madeline mccann in his house? Aodhan hearty, May I also include he looks like a bug. Oh and don't forget the rot on his teeth, it is fucking disgusting. It really looks like he hasn't brushed his teeth in quite a substantial period of time, in my opinion, he is the only person who is actually comparible to sean.

thumb_up thumb_down -11

What was John Lennon's last hit? The pavement.

thumb_up thumb_down +14

Why can't Ray Charles see his friends? He's blind. Also he is dead.

thumb_up thumb_down -15

A man builds a time machine but can only travel back in time. Where does he go? Irrelevant. Time and space exist on different planes.

thumb_up thumb_down +16

Simon walks into a bar. He orders his favorite beer. The bartender says "Hey Simon, I see you're back with the usual, aye?" Simon says "Touch you tongue to your elbow." The bartender couldn't do it.

thumb_up thumb_down

What did Bear Grylls say to the dead whale? Mmmm.

thumb_up thumb_down -20

What did the boy with no arms and legs get for christmas? Nothing his parents died in a tragic car accident the night before

thumb_up thumb_down -2

Roses are red, violets are blue, I have a gun, Get in the van.

thumb_up thumb_down +18

What did Michael Jackson say to the little boy? Nothing.He's dead.

thumb_up thumb_down -13

A mountain goat walks into a bar, the bar man asks ''what will it be?''. The other customers question the mental integrity of the bar man, as goats cannot talk

thumb_up thumb_down -6

How do you describe a cranky rapist? Cranky and rapist

thumb_up thumb_down -24

Why did the boy drop his ice cream? He did not have sufficient stability in his arm at that moment causing him to loosen his grip and drop his ice cream.

thumb_up thumb_down +26

what is the difference between a blond and a red head? one is has blond hair and one has red hair

thumb_up thumb_down -33

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops