Why did the first koala fall out of the tree? because it was dead. Why the second koala fall out of the tree? because it was hit by the first koala. Why did the third koala fall out of the tree? because it thought it was a game.

thumb_up thumb_down +39

what did the boy with no arms and legs get for christmas? Cancer what did he get the next year? Nothing he didn't make it that long.

thumb_up thumb_down +6

How do you you know when you haven't slept in a while? You're tired.

thumb_up thumb_down -13

what did helen keller say when she dropped a box on her toe. nothing. helen keller cannot speak

thumb_up thumb_down +39

CAN YOU FIND YOUR D I C K YET BOMBER

thumb_up thumb_down -41

What do you do when you come across a dead baby? Add it to your collection.

thumb_up thumb_down -22

What did the penny say to the other penny? Nothing, because pennies can't talk.

thumb_up thumb_down -25

Two twins are born only a minute apart. There is a mistake at the hospital and they are seperated. Years later they reconnect on Oprah and realize they do not have much in common.

thumb_up thumb_down +24

What did the doctor say to the patient? You have cancer.

thumb_up thumb_down +4

Golgo12 here, I can see how some people consider you insane Nero, glad to know point zero is the starting ground of your elysum, that should show them how a modern society should be like. You got six years left to live? That sucks man sorry to hear that. Ur real name is Nero? Axel Knight sounds so much more... You.

thumb_up thumb_down -17

Why did Sally eat popcorn? She was watching a movie

thumb_up thumb_down -13

Good boy

thumb_up thumb_down -6

BOB: Hey look its spiderman Spiderman: IT'S MANSPIDER!!! Punch! Kick! Ouch!

thumb_up thumb_down -1

I was trying to think of a joke to write, but then I became unsatisfied with my creativity and began to spiral into a depressing tangent of thoughts. I just took 37 Ambien, and have approximately ten minutes to live. Instead, I will spend my last moments writing goodbye messages to friends on Facebook and longingly looking at images of the past. Goodbye, world.

thumb_up thumb_down -11

Q. How many blondes does it take to put in a lightbulb? A. Cause of 7,8,9!

thumb_up thumb_down -4

What do black people and apples have in common? Nothing.

thumb_up thumb_down +5

What would you do for a Klondike bar? I'd go all the way to the store and buy one.

thumb_up thumb_down -2

Why did the chicken cross the road? To get to its dying chicks who were just run over.

thumb_up thumb_down -10

A boy goes into a Bakery and asks for a loaf of bread, the baker asks him if he wants a white loaf or a Wholemeal loaf, the boy replies, "it doesn't matter i have my bike outside"

thumb_up thumb_down -34

Did you hear about the woman you got hit by a car? The Driver was intoxicated and had no control over his faculties which cause him to careen off of the road and hit this poor soul as she patiently waited at a crosswalk.

thumb_up thumb_down +23

* How many roads must a man walk down before you call him a man? * He just need to go to the Register Office and change his name to "a man"

thumb_up thumb_down +5

What is the diffrence between a guy and pie? The pie taste like fruit somethimes

thumb_up thumb_down +23

What do you call a black man flying a plane? A pilot, you dirty racist.

thumb_up thumb_down -1

all muslims get the fuck out of britain you fucks

thumb_up thumb_down -57

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops