What's green, yellow, and red? A traffic light

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What do you call a fly without wings? A fly without wings.

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Why did the little girl's pet bunny pass away? Because her neighbor ripped out it's vitals.

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Q: A blonde, a red-head, and a brunette all jump off the bridge at the same time. Who hits the ground first? A: As stated by Sir Isaac Newton's third law of gravitation, all three fall to their deaths at the exact same time because the velocity of a falling object is unaffected by the mass of that object... or their hair colour. Idiot.

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What do you call a car that is green? A Green Car.

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What do you call an earthquake on Mars? There is not enough water on planet Mars for something like that to happen.

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Why did Silly Billy throw a clock out the window? Because he has a serious anger problem.

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Why did Rose throw the clock out the window? Because she's a moron.

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Friends are like trees, they fall down when you hit them multiple times with an axe. N

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How do you leave a man in suspense...

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What did the muffin, say to the other muffin? Nothing. Because muffin's are inanimate objects, therefore incapable of speech, or any other sentient action. They baked quietly until the man who was baking them came to the conclusion they were fit for consumption, devoured them, and went on with his day.

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wouldnt it be ironic if chuck norris was shooting blanks

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whats the same about a red crayon and a blue crayon? there both the same color except for the blue one

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How do you know when it is a Mexican's birthday? They are walking around with "happy birthday" balloons.

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what did the angry asian man do after chrashing his car? He died later in the hospital that night from a combination of severe head trauma, internal bleeding, and various fractures.

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Roses are red Violets are blue We cant have sex I have ED

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Yo mama is so fat that she has to eat low calorie foods because she wants to lose weight.

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A baby seal walks into a club...

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Why did the black man buy a watermelon? So he can eat it.

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Q: A black man, A Mexican, And a Asian are in a car. Who Is Driving? A: The Cop.

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What did the man on a business trip to Japan say to his wife on the phone? The nuclear reactor in the next city over is melting down as we speak. If I don't see you again, I love you.

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THEY SAY SEEING IS BELIEVING. I NEVER SAW 9/11! 9/11? NEVER HAPPENED -Jonathan

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What did the rake say to the shovel? Nothing, they're both inanimate objects.

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KNOCK! KNOCK! who knocks like that? seriously all my friends r Dbags n break the door down...wow ur polite....um ok WHO'S THERE? THE REAPER oh sh** dude! NO ONES HOME! "in other news this evening, two local men found dead on theyre living room floors. Police say the front door was smashed in...an obvious sign of forced entry. The two men were apparently reading a webpage called anti-joke before suddenly having an unexplained heart attack and dieing....heh heh hey nancy...why did the chicken cross the road? because he thuroughly enjoyed darting out into traffic." "HAHAHAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA.......GASP! GA FA! GAA *gargle*" "wow...in other OTHER news i just killed nancy...."*runs* JOKES KILL >:}

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops