Why can't the blonde dial 911? Because she's being held hostage against her will.

thumb_up thumb_down +7

no rasist joks

thumb_up thumb_down -30

Why was the black man pulled over on his way to KFC? Because he ran a red light.

thumb_up thumb_down -5

Q: What is green, jumps and says i'm a frog? A: A frog that talks

thumb_up thumb_down -33

You:why did the kid get a massage? Guest:Why? You:Cuz he wanted one.

thumb_up thumb_down -32

Who won the race between the turtle and the hare? Well, odds are the two creatures wouldn't race given that animals do not speak. However, if they were, the hare would most likely win a land race because of its powerful legs and agility. However, if the turtle happened to be a seaturtle and the race took place underwater, our dear little beloved turtle would win, having the advantage over the rabbit.

thumb_up thumb_down +15

You stink so bad that you should cleanse yourself via shower and/or bath.

thumb_up thumb_down +16

a ghost walks into a bar and sais BOO! The bartender then yelded AAAAHHH! and died of a hart attack.

thumb_up thumb_down -18

When The bus came by Jimmy went bye-bye

thumb_up thumb_down -18

Engage in a lively debate with a friend, and when they are about to stump you, respond to whatever they say next with "What does that have to do with the price of tea in China?"

thumb_up thumb_down -3

Knock Knock Who's There? 9/11 9/11 who? You said you'd never forget.

thumb_up thumb_down +82

What is the difference between a baleen whale and a black guy? One speaks and one says EEEEEEERRRROOOOOWWOWOWOWOOWRR!

thumb_up thumb_down -11

A horse, a duck, a pig, and an arab walk into a bar. The horse ducks, the duck's hoarse, the pig's in a blanket, and the arab has a can, being surprised at how far a can can preach hate in Chicago. The bartender reminds the arab that he's with a swine, and the arab is offended for the poor horse.

thumb_up thumb_down -44

did you hear about the circus fire? it was tragic and hundreds of people were killed.

thumb_up thumb_down -18

Why did the chicken cross the road? We will never know. Chickens are incapable of communicating with humans and thus the intent of the chicken can only be speculated.

thumb_up thumb_down -1

A frog jumped on the lilly pad, it sank and drown and all of the tadpoles didn't have a mother and inevitably died

thumb_up thumb_down -15

YEAH THEY DO.

thumb_up thumb_down

shauns beautiful

thumb_up thumb_down

Knock knock, Who's there? The police, you have committed 14 major felonies and you are being arrested.

thumb_up thumb_down +30

Q. What do you call a guy who only drinks lite beer. A. His name.

thumb_up thumb_down +12

Where do penguins keep their money? No where. Penguins don't have a money economy

thumb_up thumb_down -16

What did God say when he made his first black guy? Oh no I burned one! :)

thumb_up thumb_down +8

A duck walks into a bar and orders 2 beers and a shot. The bartender says "That'll be four fifty." The duck says he doesn't have any money and asks if the bartender can put it on his bill. The bartender says "No." He then picked the duck up by the neck and raped him mercilessly. "That's what he gets" one patron said. "Yeah, he was asking for it"

thumb_up thumb_down -32

Why did the Skyrim guard stop adventuring? He was killed in action and his family misses him terribly.

thumb_up thumb_down +24

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops