There was an Irishman, an American and a French man standing at a bar. They all ordered drinks and struck up conversation with each other about what they do for a living and their families. They all go home to their partners and have a peaceful nights sleep.

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Why couldn't Ray Charles read? He was blind.

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If I could rearrange the alphabet I probably wouldn't.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because a random biological stimulus compelled it to.

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A hundred dollar bill falls in the middle of an intersection. Equally distanced from the bill stand a Jew, a Black, a White Supremacist and an Arab. Wouldn't it suck to be on this street? I am sure violence will ensue.

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Q: What do you call a black man in space? A: An astronaut. -Ap

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because once it had inadvertently escaped the farm it was being kept on it was startled and with no concept of road and pavement happened to traverse a road, with no real motive.

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why did the chicken cross the road? because chickens are very absent-minded creatures. the chances are the chicken saw some form of bug or other edible life form from across the road and decided to venture over in that direction. if the road was not there, the chicken would most likely have still crossed that same expanse of ground, regardless of potential consequences.

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What did the black man say to his wife? Nothing, she had died earlier that year after a long battle with cancer.

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Penis Gabriel - Go eat some ice cream! Boner McDaniels - No. Penis Gabriel - Ok.

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A Pole walks into a bar and gets annexed by Germany.

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Why did the little girl fall off the swing? Because she had no arms.

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You know you're dyslexic when life gives you melons.

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what did the asian father say to his son after seeing he got a B- in math? "There's small room for improvement but overall you did a great job son."

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Moral: Sure, your number is the one that ends with 853 right? Do not reply if I am right. Moral2: BECAUSE TOP COMMENT... AND SERIOUSLY, THAT NUMBER BETTER END WITH 69 AFTER I CALL YOU! DO NOT REPLY

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why did oprah, your mother, and a monkey on a rock have in common? the ability to fornicate

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I AM YOUR SALVATION! And you are my poopstain

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree?? Because it Died

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"Knock Knock" "Who's there?" "Me. May I come in?" "Yes, you may."

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If a man and a woman get married in Texas and move to Washington are they still brother and sister?

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A short Irish man and a tall German man went skydiving. Both parachutes coincidentally failed to deploy and they died.

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So let's pretend two men that had been friends for a very long time, one man asks the other man how he is, so the man tells the other man how he is doing. Then that man asks the other man how he is doing. The two men were engaged in a very interesting conversation. What did the men do next? Nothing. We're pretending, remember?

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Why did the Turkey cross the road? Because it was stapled to the chicken

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What do you get when you mix your mom and your dad? YOU!!!

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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