What is the answer to life, universe and everything? Nothing.

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Why was the pizza mad? Because he was going thorough a growth spurt and the testosterone got to him.

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KANE TUCKER HAS A CHODE THE SIZE OF HIS FINGER NAIL

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Q: Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? A: b/c it was dead. Q: Why did the second monkey fall out if the tree? A: b/c it was stapled to the first one. Q: Why did the third monkey fall out of the tree? A: b/c he thought it was a game. Q: Why did the toaster fall out of the tree? A: The branch snapped. Q: Why did the little girl fall off of her bike? A: She was hit by three monkeys and a toaster :( MAB99

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Roses are red, Violets are purple, not fucking blue.

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if john has 400 cookies and eats 300 what does he have left? diabetes

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A man walks into a bar... But, it's not funny because he's an alcoholic and it's destroying his family.

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roses are rose, violets are violet, now shut up, you retarded black poet!

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Did you hear the one about Helen Keller? Neither did she.

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A guy walks into a bar. After only 10 minutes, he leaves. The bar closes in 10 minutes.

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A horse walks into a bar. The bartender says, "Hey, horse, we don't serve your kind here." The horse turns around and walks out. 10 minutes later, the horse returns. "Hey horse," says the bartender, "I said we don't serve your kind here!" The horse turns around and walks out. 10 minutes later, the horse returns. "Hey horse, are you deaf? I said we don't serve your kind here!" The horse turns around and walks out, knocking over a stool with his tail.

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Every 60 seconds In Africa......... A minute passes.

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How many Jehovah's Witnesses does it take to screw in a light bulb? 2. One to firmly hold the ladder and the other to cautiously screw it in. They are volunteering at the local orphanage and it is wrong to make fun of there religion. We are all different in our own special way. ernkso

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How do you wake up a black man? You stab him in the thigh.

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What did the cat say to the dog? Meow

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, I stole all your jokes, I stole this one too.

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How do you fit 100 ethiopians in a phone box? With great difficulty.

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Lady is taking her Alzheimer grandpa to shop for his birthday. Parks, gets out and opens the door for him. He looks at her and asks? Who are you?

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How do you get 100 midgets into a Mini? You have to manufacture a Mini large enough to accommodate 100 midgets. It wouldn't be street-legal, but at least the problem of getting 100 midgets into a Mini is solved.

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Roses are red, Violets are blue. I have AIDS, Now you do too!

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Why do black people suck? Because they're black

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Why can't penguins fly? ......It is against their evolutionary state.

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What's worse then biting into a apple and finding a worm? I can't think of anything worse.

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Why was the black man crying? Becasue his wife and children were killed in a horrific car accident on their way home from church.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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