knock, knock who's there? I'm here to kill u! I'm here to kill u who? .......

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One day a mexican guy came up with a great anti-joke about jewish guys. Upon sharing it with a canadian buddy of his, he collapsed and died from a cerebral hemorrhage where he was then hit by a bus and mauled to bits by a pack of saber-tooth tigers.

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Knock Knock. Who's there? Orange. Orange Who? Oranges are very good for you and enriched with vitamin C that is apparently good to intake when you are experiencing cold/flu like symptoms during the winter season and your doctor won't give you medication because you aren't sick enough and you already ask for medication to much because you think you are always sick with something. That's what happens when you're a hypochondriac.

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Who lives in a pineapple under the sea? No-one because that's not feasible.

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PUDDING

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(Insert joke here)

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Why was the crocodile depressed? It wasn't; given the primitive anatomy of the reptilian brain, modern biopsychoneurological evidence suggests that reptiles feel only basic emotions such as fear or anger.

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Two girls are backpacking in the Sierra Nevada. They walk 8 km from their base camp at a bearing of 42 degrees. After lunch, they document the wildlife they have seen because they are tracking the populations of species native to the area. Then they continue on their hike, but this time at a bearing of 127 degrees. After 5 km, they reach their destination for the day and set up a temporary camp.

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a woman asked her husband, why havent you been talking to me? the man answers, you are having an affair so i ignored you and only talked to the girl im cheating on you with. you should know your a horrible person

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why did the grandmother forget her grandsons name? she has Alzheimers so she is slowly forgetting all her relatives

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Q:Baby, baby, baby, oooh A:Thats what she said.

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Whats black white and red all over? A decapitated panda.

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Whats worse than sour milk? 911. Whats worse than 911? drinking sout milk!

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why did the girl cross the road? to get away from you

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I painted my dog to look like pizza. Someone ate him. It was my mom.

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Why didn't Clair get up all day? She died in her sleep.

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How do you get twenty black men in a tiny car? Saw them into pieces.

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You can tell I have many friends because I got them to like this.

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Why did the two black men break into a bank with guns? It was being robbed by a white man and they were police officers.

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What's purple and fuzzy? A piece of purple fuzz.

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make me a sandwich!

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Did you here about the guy who got his right leg and right arm cut off? I made him up but he would make one good anti-joke.

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Why didn't Bill go to the party? He wasn't invited.

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*Knock knock* Who's there? *Silence* (The person knocking is deaf)

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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