Why did the kitchen cross the road?

Why did the man die? He helped others before placing his own oxygen mask on?

Did you hear about Phil in accounting? No? Well he was trying to make a new type of car. He took the seats from a ford engine from a dodge, and the frame from a toyota. Do you know what he got? 5 years in jail.

What's the difference between The Hulk and The Thing? One is green.

how did the asian man get on the internet? by opening his internet browser just like everyone else

A black man is seen next to a dead man. Who do you call? The ambulance.

Why did the chicken cross the road? It just didn't.

A suicide bomber enters a bar. Everyone dies.

What did the doctor say to the camel with no hump? You're a horse.

Roses are red, Violets are red, Tulips are red, As you can tell...a lot of blood has been spilt today.

Roses are red, Violets are blue, You know most poems rhyme, This one doesn't

Why did the armadillo fall off the cliff?

What is BIG, STIFF, AND FULL OF SEMEN!!!? A SUBMARINE!!!!!!!

Knock knock Who's there Bill Bill who? Bill Thompson

your momma is so poor she had you just for the free milk

Why does the deer cross the road? It had just birthed two deer, one of which was hungry, and food was on the other side, the other had been hit by 4x4 Hemi V8 Supercharged F1-50.

Why didn't the bear go snowboarding? It was hibernating

Why did the chicken cross the road? It just didn't.

Knock knock Who's There Doctor Doctor Who? Wrong, it's Dr. Doozer, you have AIDS

Why isn't Neil Patrick Harris like Barney Stinson in real life? Because he's gay

Cornflakes were an accident, so was Chernobyl

There's a Christian preist, Jesus, and a Jewish rabi on a boat. They want to go fishing, but they forgot the sunscreen, the bait, and the fishing line. The Christian preist walks across the water and goes and gets the Sunscreen. Jesus walks across the water and gets the bait. The Jewish rabi steps out of the boat and drowns. Jesus turns to the Priest and says, "Do you suppose we should have told about the underwater bridge?"

YOUR MOM SHOT YOU OUT HER ASS!!!

Q:Why did the black man fall down? A: he got hit in the face by a refrigerator

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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