How do you kill a blonde? Stab her...

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"Do you know the joke about the No and Me Neither?" "No..." "Me neither."

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What is similar between a horse and a zebra? - If you chopped of there heads, they would die.

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Why did the black man go to school? So he could graduate with a degree and persue his life in medicine. He later goes on to get his P.H.D. He now supports his healthy family of 5 and living in Idaho, the state of the potato. He has a job as a doctor and is making more than $2M a year. Ha, didn't expect that now did ya.

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What did the man do when he saw there was water spilled on his desk? He waited two hours for it to evaporate because he was too lazy to wipe it up.

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Once there was an ugly barnacle. He was so ugly that everyone died. The end.

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why did the cow cross the road because pigs were not flying i had to write it hurts

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Why bouriquet fall off the swing? Ask him.

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Why was the strict Asian father angry when his son got an A- on his test? He found out that his son had been cheating.

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what did johnny's dad say to him after his baseball game? nothing because johnny's dad was an abusive alcoholic who beat him until the neighbors found out and called the police. the dad was arrested, tried in court then promptly thrown in jail were he was raped in the showers repeatedly by a very large and intimidating black man. he vomited suicide in his cell today by drinking drain cleaner

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Why did the first squirrel fall out of the tree? It was dead. Why did the second squirrel fall out of the tree? It was stapled to the first one. Why did the third squirrel fall out of the tree? Peer Pressure. Why did Bobby fall off his bike? He was hit by 4 squirrels Why did bobby die? He was hit by a bus

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whats funny about this joke? nothing.

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Yo mama so fat because it's in her genes.

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What did the parrot say to the cow? Moo

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Knock Knock Who's there? It's the postman, I have a package you need to sign for.

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How do you kill a Chinese man? There are many ways, all of which are horrible

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You know what's addicting? Heroine.

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Why did the submarine crash? Someone opened the window

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What do you call a gay man flying an aeroplane? A pilot.

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What's worse than the holocaust? Probably nothing

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What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? Slowly being tortured to death.

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What do you give a man who has everything? Syphilis

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Why wasn't Kevin Love able to draw a perfect circle. Because, he just wasn't able to get the job done

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Roses are red Violets are blue Elephants cant jump Neither can amputees

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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