Hello, nice to meet you.

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What can you conclude about a black man in a mercedes? He has crack and car insurance.

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Why was little Johnny sad? His parents were killed in an awful fire

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Well, it was kind of by chance that it crossed the road and what is the big deal lots of animals cross the road. For example possums, squirrels, deer, raccoons, cats, dogs, rabbits do pretty often too it's weird because sometimes more rabbits cross the road on Easter I don't know if that's just me though, chipmunks, bears, over in Africa probably tigers and lions cross those roads.

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A terrorist walks into a bar and shoots the bartender.

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Whats better than winning a Paralympic Gold Medal? Having Legs.

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whats long and black? a baton

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What do you do if you are locked inside a car with a baseball bat? Unlock the car

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An apple a day keeps the doctor away. Unless he's a witch doctor, then you'll need an apple and some ayaheusca. The fractal dream will destroy time and space as consciousness returns upon itself at times end

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Q: Whats Brown and sticky A: an eagle except for the brown and sticky part

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Q. Why did Sally fall off the swing? A. Because she had no arms Q. What smells like red paint and is blue? A. Blue Paint Knock Knock? Who's There NOT SALLY

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Knock knock (Knock knock...) (Knock knock...) (Knock knock...) (Knock knock...) (Knock knock...) Fuck me, that's the most echo-y door I've ever knocked on.

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What happens when you murder someone? The Government murders you.

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Why did Sally fall off the swing? Why? Because she has no arms. Knock. Knock. Who's there? Not Sally

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What did Batman get for Christmas. Nothing his parents are dead.

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Why can't Hellen Keller drive? She's a women.

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I like my wine just like how I like my woman 5 years old and in my basement.

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Roses are red. Violets are blue. Your parents are dead, and so will you.

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I was Writing and i broke my pencil

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Why do deer have horns? Because god made them that way.

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Steven hawking walks into a bar. a.w j.p

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What did Anne Frank do this weekend? Nothing. she died in the holocaust.

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How do you eat an Elephant? Elephant meat is most palatable after roasting in a 450 degree oven for 2 hours. Garnish with carrots and broccoli.

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, He has died, And now will you,

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops