:3

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What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? Finding half a worm.

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If you are American when you walk into a bathroom and American when you walk back out, what are you when you are inside the bathroom? You're probably dispelling waste products from your body.

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your moms so fat she has kankles

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Why didn't the lactose intolerant man get a drink at the bar? He was the designated driver.

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What do a bicycle and a platypus have in common? They both have wheels, except the platypus doesn't.

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What do you get if you cross a banana, a mango, and an apple? A smoothie

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Q: How did the girl in high school become so popular? A: She got pregnant

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What's the difference between Michael Jackson and Neil armstrong Neil armstrong walks on the moon...Michael Jackson molests little boys

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Why couldn't the pirate get into the adult movie? He had just spent the last of his money at Ihop with his friends, and is now regretting ordering two Rooty Tooty Fresh and Fruitys when he was really only hungry for one.

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Q: Why did the chicken cross the road? A: 9/11

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roses are red. violetss are black. a knife would go good in your back

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what did the little boy say when the teacher asked what he wanted to be when he grew up? Adolf Hitler

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What happens when a girl falls? Another girl pees her pants

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An Englishman, a Frenchman and a German strand on an island. Searching the jungle, they fall into a trap. They get painfully killed and eaten by the cannibals.

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Q: What does DNA stand for? A: National Dyslexic Association

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Why couldn't johnny go home? Someone commited arsen and burned it down.

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Why was Charles bleeding, because he was stabbed in the head with a needle

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Your dad is so abusive that he hurts you when he losses his temper

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goats are like mushrooms, if you shoot a duck, im scared of toasters

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a man walks into a bar some other people get up and greet him as they are his friends. he then has a great night with his friends. he goes home and goes to sleep. he wakes up with a man next to him

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I asked a Jewish girl for her number, so she rolled up her sleve

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An Englishman, A Scotsman, a Welshman, an Australian, An American, A German, A Swede, A Kiwi, An Austrian, A Belgian, A Frenchman, A Chinese Guy, An Indian, A Turk, A Czech, A Canadaian, A Russian, A serbian, A Portuguese, A brazilian, An Argentine and a South African go in to a bar. The Security stops them and says "I'm sorry i can't let you in without a thai"

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roses are red voilets are blue my dog stinks and so do you!

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops