How can you tell if a duck is sleeping? Look at its eyes.

thumb_up thumb_down

If life hands you lemons your probably hallucinating.

thumb_up thumb_down +3

What happens when Brittany Spears is hungry? She goes to taco bell for food

thumb_up thumb_down -3

Why has there never been a Mexican on the moon? Because Mexico's government funding for their space program is insufficient to take them all the way to the moon.

thumb_up thumb_down +29

A man goes to a gas station to pump gas in his car. After about 7 minutes, he leaves.

thumb_up thumb_down +8

Q: Why did the chicken cross the road? A: He couldn't, his legs were broken

thumb_up thumb_down -16

Why was 6 afraid of 7? 7 brutally raped and murdered 32.

thumb_up thumb_down -6

Two Iranians walk into an airport They show their passports and proceed to fly to their home in Minnesota

thumb_up thumb_down +9

Why did the chicken cross the road? It didn't, as it was a busy highway it was hit before making it to halfway.

thumb_up thumb_down +21

What do you call a white basketball player? A very athletic hardworking dedicated human being.

thumb_up thumb_down +12

Roses are red Violets are blue I want to have sex But no one else wants to

thumb_up thumb_down -14

Half empty = half full Therefore Half (empty) = half (full) empty= full Half empty

thumb_up thumb_down -9

Why did the fish look like a human? Because it was a person, drowning.

thumb_up thumb_down +6

Chuck Norris threw a grendade, killed 50 people, then it exploded This is a highly improbable event considering no man is faster then a grenade

thumb_up thumb_down +21

Hey dude. who died.... crickets crickets crickets crickets crickets crickets crickets crickets YO MAMA

thumb_up thumb_down +2

Why didn't the man go to work? He got stabbed.

thumb_up thumb_down -7

Black Ops? That sounds illegal. Anyway, what do you mean you are a employee only? I mean if you where a fed, you would either be on the top, or be an employee no?

thumb_up thumb_down -17

Why did the sperm cross the road? Because I put on the wrong sock this morning.

thumb_up thumb_down +6

Why did the lorry cross the road? It was swerving to avoid a small child. Unfortunately the driver's reactions were too slow and he hit the kid. After a week fighting for their life in hospital the child fibaly died. There wasn't a scratch on the lorry though.

thumb_up thumb_down -22

How does a girl with no arms swing on the swing? She doesn't, she has no arms.

thumb_up thumb_down +6

What did one ocean say to the other ocean, nothing it just waved

thumb_up thumb_down +4

Two tomatoes walk across the street and manage to get over safely. COME ON MUSTARD!

thumb_up thumb_down +4

once upon a time there was a girl named katie. she walked across the road. she got hit by a truck. now she's in heaven. the end,.

thumb_up thumb_down +6

NASA sent a probe to Uranus and wondered why people were laughing.

thumb_up thumb_down +6

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops