What did the homeless man find on the side of the street? A pile of dead babies.

What was jesus's first miracle? He made a blind man walk. And for the stupid people out there jesus's first supposed miracle was making a cripple Walk

Your Mother is so stupid that not only can she not peform basic mathematical sums, but she frequantly makes spelling errors

Q: What did Cyclops say to Wolverine? A: "We're both X-Men!"

How did the kid drop his ice cream cone? Ans. He got hit by a bus

Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? because i shot him. Why did the bird fall out of the tree? he was in front of the monkey

Why did the dog die? I beat him with a bat

Joe Paterno doesn't walk into a police station..

Do you know how I know that you're gay? You told me you are gay.

A white person went to see Think like a Lady by Steve Harvey.

The Below statement is an antijoke. The Above statement is a joke.

A man named Chuck walks into a bar. One of the patrons says, "Oh my god! You're Walker, Texas Ranger!" Chuck replies, "No, that's Chuck Norris. I'm Chuck Connors. I played the Rifleman." The man replies, "Wait, aren't you dead?"

What happened when the Hispanic man dropped his Wollet? He picked it up

Why did the chicken cross the road? Because he was a socially responsible chicken and his family was on the other side and every day walks his ass across the street to go to work to provide for his family, unlike your dead-beat ass.

What did the strawberry say to the grape? Nothing, inanimate objects can't use verbal communication.

Q: Where do zombies shop? A: Zombercrombie.

Why did the chicken cross the road? Unfortunately there are billions of chickens in the world and based on the question it is not possible to determine which specific chicken is being referred to. Even if we were able to ascertain this knowledge it would be unlikely that we could determine its purpose, as chickens don't usually make decisions based on logical thought.

why can't johnny compete in the track race? because he has no feet.

Hey! How do you do a four strand plait? With four strands.

A duck walks into a bar. Animal control is notified, and the duck is released into a nearby park.

A pig and an elephant walk into a bar. But the pig doesn't even make it into the bar because the mentaly insane elephant ate him. Ouch

What do you call a dragon with no wings? A komodo dragon

Why did the first monkey fall out of the tree? It was dead. Why did the second monkey fall out of the tree? It was stapled to the first monkey. Why did the third monkey fall out of the tree? Peer pressure. Why did the refrigerator fall out of the tree? Physics. Why did Tommy fall of his bike? He was hit by 3 monkeys and a refrigerator.

Why did the girl scream? She was being raped.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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