whats yellow and blue and green all over? the color green

How do you call the smallest mouse on Earth? James.

why was allison crying? because her mom's dead.

What's the difference between the NBA and the WNBA? What's the WNBA?

What do you do if you walk in on your wife atempting to hang herself in the living room? Ask her to leave the living room, as it would be ironic.

Why couldn't the man make it to work? Because as he was leaving his apartment, he saw a gruesome murder on the street that was part of an ever-growing and evolving genocide. Quickly following this, he broke down into psychological turmoil and wandered aimlessly through the streets until he eventually reached a forest, where he was taken in by a wild boar and raised to believe in boar-gods. The man died peacefully while planting potatoes.

Q: Why was the boy so sad? A: His parents were just killed in a car wreck, therefore orphaning him and his five brothers and sisters and leaving them with no money, food, or shelter due to lack of steady income and the fact that their house had been foreclosed on.

Why did Sally fall off the swing? Because she had no arms. Knock knock. Who's there? NOT SALLY

A man walks into a bar and the bartender says "Sorry sir we're closed" So the man goes: "Oh, okay. I wasn't sure if you guys were open till' 10pm tonight" and the bartender goes "No, thats only on the weekends" The man thanks the bartender and proceeded to leave the bar. He now knows the arrive earlier the following day.

what did the woman call the man who ate Ham? A Pig

Lil Wayne's song 6 foot 7 foot was named after my wewe

What has two legs and bleeds a lot? Half a dog.

What does a cannibal do after dumping his girlfriend? Procedes with his long difficult hunt to find another companion who accepts him for what he is, without the fear of being eaten.

What do you call a man who is dirty, and is searching through a pile of garbage? A man who threw out his divorce papers.

What do you get when you cross The Incredible Hulk and King Kong? Two angry fictional characters.

why did the chicken cross the road? to get to the fried chicken restaurant... BAWK BAWK cannibal

Zach Murfitt has a huge penis! Lol jk he has an inchy stryder

How do you stop a baby from drowning? Take your foot of his head

Adam eats ginger nuts the fookin chicken

Q) What did the Hobo get for Xmas? A) Nothing

What did the wife get her husband after they had intercourse? A sandwich, because she loved him and knew he was hungry.

What does a carrot and a potato have in common? They're both not chocolate

Michael Brown

That awkwad moment when a homeless man runs naked around a golf cource yelling hears the 19th hole bitches.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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