Roses are black, violets are black. I'm blind.

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What did the sushi say to the bee? Nothing, a piece of sushi can't talk and a bee wouldn't listen, stupid.

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What did the penguin say to the other penguin? Nothing, penguins don't talk.

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Why did the first monkey fall off the tree? becuase he died Why did the second monkey fall off the tree? because he was stapled to the first monkey Why did the third monkey fall off the tree? monkey see, monkey do

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A man who was clearly tired and worn out enters a bar. The bartender says "Long night, eh?" The man responds "Yes, very. I was with my girlfriend." The bartender says in response "Well I'm sure that was a fun time, if you know what I'm sayin." "No, not really" says the man. Little did the bartender know, the man's girlfriend was a dominatrix.

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What's the difference between a black guy and a white guy? Thousands of years of different evolutionary tracks resulting from different climates and available food sources.

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i am a slasher, a slasher of prices to get to the other side. poop goo goo gaga

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what are you called if your really funny but you not smart? the class clown

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There are two types of people in this world. People who can count, and people who can't.

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Why was the blonde so dumb? She had a severe case of dyslexia, which made it difficult to study.

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A daring man proclaimed "Well, here goes nothing!" And nothing happened.

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Did you hear about the black guy who got into college? Actually, there are nearly 10,00 African Americans who get accepted into college every year. This specific black male is notable because of his stellar grades and his activity in his community.

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Un petit gars se plante en vélo et il se met à pleurer.

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What do you call a black man flying a plane? A pilot. Seeing a black pilot is not alarming. If their middle-eastern, however, you have more of a problem.

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Why did the waiter put rubber bands in the soup? Because he wasn't a very good waiter.

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, Tulips are white, and Pansies are pink.

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Click thumb up i will be eternally grateful

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15

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Why did the woman leave the kitchen? She had just prepared her breakfast and was late for her full-time job as a firefighter.

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What's red and green and goes 100 mph? A frog in a blender

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A man sees another man sitting on a bench with a pickle in his ear. He asks the man "Why do you have a pickle in your ear?" The other man replies "What? I couldn't hear you because I have a pickle in my ear."

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What's the difference between a truckload of bowling balls and a truckload of dead babies. One is used in the sport of bowling, and the other is just a tragic, very saddening sight to see.

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You know why Michael J. Fox makes really good milkshakes? ... because he uses the best ingredients.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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