Customer: Can I have a tin of red paint, please? Shop owner: I'm sorry sir, we only have yellow paint left. Customer: That's ok, I have my bike with me.

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What happens when you stab yourself in the heart? You die.

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What do you call a man who beats his adopted, black children? A terrible person.

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If pinocchio said "my nose is going to grow", what would happen?

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Why did the plane crash? The pilot was a loaf of bread.

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What's the difference between a woman with an IQ of 160, and a man who is mentally challenged? Although being a much easier potential victim, no one has raped the mentally challenged man.. yet.

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A women left the kitchen.

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feminism

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because the stock market crashed 600 points today, and his retirement account took a hit. He can't afford his car anymore.

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what do you call a cat with no tail? smithers.

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Why did Helen Keller's dog run away? You would run away too if your name was urdaagaa.

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Why did the little boy cry? Because his parents were shot in the face while he was forced to watch you insensitive jerk Now walk away ????

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What did the Jew say to the German? Yes I would like fries with that.

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Sam: This math homework is gay. Cory: You should pursue a romantic relationship with your gay math homework.

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What's the difference between unicorns and black people? That whole slavery thing.

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#So tell me what you want, what you really really want, so tell me what you want, what you really really want.# OhOk then. I'll take that photo of your mother.

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Why did the man fall of his bike? He wasn't on his bike, i drowned him yesterday.

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A man walks into a library looking for books on poor punchlines. The Librarian directs him to the appropriate section.

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Dear paranoid people who check behind their shower curtains for murderers, If you do find one, what`s your plan?

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Your mumma is so fat, she has diabetes.

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Roses are cheap Violets are on sale It's Boxing Day Please buy my flowers I really need the cash.

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Why did the black guy buy watermelon? It was on sale.

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This one time at band camp....

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What has legs but may never walk? A Vietam Vet

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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