whats worse than finding a worm in your penis having your wife bite of your penis and die from an infecction

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What would an ice hockey player do if the ice melted? Walk off, as the ice is only 3/4 of an inch thick.

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:( You are right Nero, I am terribly sorry, when I see you, I see the brightest man I have ever seen, should you ever turn against me and stop underestimating yourself, there is nothing I could do.

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whats black and strange a paki

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What do you call love at first sight? A broken heart.

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What do you call a bunch of black people buried up to their hair? Afro turf

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How do mummies keep there secrets wrapped up? They are dead.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? To make it home in time for Thanksgiving.

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Whats big black and hairy? A large black dog.

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A woman is walking down the street. A midget approaches her and with his keen sense of smell, informs the tall woman of her delicious scent and says, "Ma'am your hair smells lovely, may I please take a closer sniff?" Then woman obliges and the midget is arrested for alleged rape, or as he put it, trying to sniff her vagina.

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''I went to the zoo the other day, there was only one dog in it, it was a shitzu.''

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I love animals . But the ASPCA soon put a stop to that .

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What happens when you breed a T-rex and a mammoth? You can't, both animals are extinct.

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how does stephen hawking get an erection? he turns off his pop-up blocker

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You wanna see my secret freckle? NO! How about my butt? What!!!!!!!

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what's famous and sounds like a type of food? a famous artist's name slightly modified to include the name of a food

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Whats funnier than Steven Yuhasz being Straight? Womens Rights.

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Why did the girl go over her texting limit? She had a hot boyfriend.

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learn the ropes?

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A horse walks into a bar and orders a drink. What does he order? Nothing. The horse was incapable of speaking English then shat on the floor, kicked over a chair and then left.

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How long did it take Jeff, a middle-aged man with a lifelong speech-destroying lisp, to overcome his impediment? Less than ten minutes, as carbon monoxide is a colorless, odorless toxic gas that eliminates oxygen at a rapidly-acting rate inside of small areas such as the car Jeff locked himself inside.

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Two men walk into a bar, one ducks

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Why did lil' Jimmy fall off his bike? The weight ratio between the left and right sections of his body became uneven due to some sort of change in the traction of the tires to the bumps on the road/ path.

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How do you make a grilled cheese for a black guy? Butter two pieces of bread, place two slices of any kind of cheese in between the pieces of bread, then fry it in a pan with butter.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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