What's the difference between a pile of dead babies and a Lamborghini? I don't have a Lamborghini in my garage.

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What did the black man get his mom for Mother's Day? Some jewelry and a very nice card.

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Why dont you ever see any black mermaids? Mermaids dont exist.

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What's black and sits at the top of the stair case? Stephen hawking in a house fire.......

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Why did Johnny fall off of the swing? The swing was defective. Knock, knock. Who's there? Johnny's lawyer.

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knock knock!? . . No.

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What's the best way to cross the road? Ideally with your feet and legs because disabled people usually don't recommend their unfortunate state of affairs. However there are other alternatives which may or may not be better than common or garden walking, such as crane hire - crossing in a crane bucket in a safe spot; chauffer driven limos, which don't do the straight, direct route, generally; and being carried on a replica of Cleopatra's carry couch (but with modern suspension, unless you prefer the up and down motion).

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I like my women like I like my coffee, I don't like coffee.

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What's worse than a baby dying of AIDS? It depends upon one's frame of reference. A family living in the US might consider the death of a baby by AIDS a horrible act by the gods. But to a similar family in sub-Saharan Africa, this might be a regular, albeit tragic occurrence.

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Why did the man not get his licence He was blind

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Yo mamma so fat, she's on a diet and is losing weight at a good, steady rate.

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Knock knock Who there? A mute Bullshit

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Why did the used car salesman stop selling cars? He got fired.

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Dude, you were so drunk last night that you got in a terrible car accident, and now you are paralyzed from the waste down for life.

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whats better than 24................. 25

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Why didn't suzzana go to school on Monday?? Because it was Sunday...I lied about it being monday

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roses are red violets are blue you look like a monkey lets take you to the zoo if by chance you try to escape ill take my fist and smash your little monkey face! btw i made this up if you use it ill kick your nuts!!!!

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Why does the chicken cross the road? Because chickens have legs to walk and they are not able to fly across the road, like the rest of their bird friends.

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What did the anti-joke say? Nothing for it is an anti-joke which is a group of word formed to create a sentence and sentences cannot speak.

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What did Santa Claus say to the young boy on Christmas Day? Santa Claus is a myth, that was actually a pedophile.

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What do Wal-Mart and Michael Jackson have in common? They both have made a lot of money and are also well known around the world.

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What did the Frenchman say to the Englishman? I don't know, I don't speak French.

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Your so dumb, you didn't notice I should have used you're. Don't lie

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Christopher Walken to a bar.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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