What caused the man to become blind? He took an arrow to the knee.

A man comes home after a long days work. It is late at night and he gets in bed with his wife who is already asleep. Later that night he gets up for a glass of water and returns to the bed room to see that his wife doesn't appear to be breathing and calls 911. He then realizes that this isn't his house and he leaves.

obama

A white man, a black man, and an Arab man are standing in a room. Who stole your wallet? No one, you suffer from ALS and therefore do not carry a wallet because you have no way in which to use it. To top it all off your medical bills are so high that your family would be financially better if you were to die and your dream of being an entrepreneur is slipping away as you realize that pitching an idea is difficult in a monotonous drone.

What did the Dog say to the Cat? Nothing, Cats and Dogs are of different species and can therefore not understand one another.

child labor

Why did the girl fall off the swing? Because she didn't have any arms

Your friend is so gay, he has consensual sex with other men. and enjoys it.

look left ------------------------------------------------------> i bet you failed.

A chicken walks into a bar and the bartender asks "What'll it be?" His friends are very concerned about his sanity.

Q: what do you call a much green circle that tastes good? A: An avocado

A:Wanna hear a joke? B: Sure A: A joke

How do you wake up a black man? You stab him in the thigh.

What's black and white and red all over? A cow being processed

What's worse than the holocaust? Nothing, the holocaust was a tragic event in human history.

A basket full of puppies can do anything, except put out a fire.

Roses are red, Violets are blue, Most poems rhyme, But this one doesn't

What do you get when you cross a blonde with Nickelodon? You get Dora because she is allways telling you what to do.

What happens when you die? Your body gets decomposed by bacteria

What do you call a black man reading a book? An avid reader that happens to be black

A man walks into a clothing store, he calls his wife, buys a shirt, and leaves.

What's similar between a black man and jelly babies? Nothing

What did the muffin, say to the other muffin? Nothing. Because muffin's are inanimate objects, therefore incapable of speech, or any other sentient action. They baked quietly until the man who was baking them came to the conclusion they were fit for consumption, devoured them, and went on with his day.

What's the difference between a bird and a fish ? They're both different, except the fish.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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