What did the cabbage say to the cabbage? I dont know ask the leafy guy.... >_

Good for him. Thats wonderful!

Q: Why is grass green? A: I painted it.

A Man goes into a watch store. Why? To buy a watch

how long is a chinese name. how long. yup.

What do old people really like? Sex.

Q: What's long, hard, and full of sea men? A: A submarine.

Why did the chicken cross the road? Because it was a chicken and was probably not aware that it was walking across a road at all, especially considering that it was likely in a low-traffic rural area.

I'm a Banker. A woman asked if I could check her balance... So I pushed her off a cliff.

What do you call a deer in the wild? a deer

what did Harry Potter get for christmas? ... nothing his parents are dead !

What's worse than the Holocaust? Finding half a worm in your apple.

Why did the duck cross the road? Because there was a gunman on the same side of the path and it would most likely be safer to avoid making eye contact

My friends new nickname is hawk-eye! He is a jackass...

What do you call a black man in space? A space monkey.

Knock, Knock. Who's there? Dave. Dave who? Dave proceeds to break into tears as his grandmother's Alzheimers has progressed to the point where she can no longer remember him.

What's as hard as rock and as light as a feather? Any object in the space, once the lack of gravity makes atoms to have not weight, since mass x gravity equals to weight.

Three tomatoes were walking down the street, a daddy, a mummy and a baby and...wait did I say tomatoes, sorry, I meant people.

A man attempts to sign in to PlayStation Network... And succeeds, proceeding to enjoy the console's numerous award winning exclusive titles such as LittleBigPlanet and Uncharted 2, along with utilizing the system's Blu Ray capabilities and playing with his friends online in an absolutely free network, on what many consider to be the superior console to the Xbox 360.

what did the radish say to the orange i'm a radish

Person 1: So now that were friends on facebook, you wanna hang out? Person 2: No I'd rather not.

What is a chair?

Why did the fall off the building? ... because I pushed her

Say this fast: Alpha kenny body sofa king hard with mike hawk. :)

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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