How do you get a black kid to sleep? A cup of warm milk and maybe a lulluby should do it.

A man and woman walk into a funeral home. They are both very sad about the loss of their father who they loved dearly.

A pig walks into a bar and says, "Oink."

One day there was a princess born in the jungle. The story goes, that she'd be saved by a grand champion - a Hero. So the day came that she fell in love. After a few magical years, they broke up and she realized that fairy tales are for little girls.

what worse the 2 dead kids in a van 3 dead kids in a van

Matt is a Duster!

Knock, Knock Who's there Cluck Cluck who? Cluck cluck cluck cluck cluck - proceed to bob head and flap wings - cluck cluck cluck cluck cluck cluck

What do you call a Black pilot? A pilot! What else would you call him, racist!

Reporter: So, how do you feel knowing you don't have some place to work when you walk out of your house because of that tornado? Guy: "Well, it feels even worse knowing I don't have a house to walk out of. . ."

A man walks into a psychiatrists office with a banana in his ear. The psychiatrist says, why do you have that banana in your ear? The man says, "What?" The psychiatrist shouts, "I SAID, WHY DO YOU HAVE THAT BANANA IN YOUR EAR?" The man says, "Sorry, I can't hear you, I'm deaf."

A twelve year old walks into a bar. How Tragic

What do you call a hickey on your shoulder? Bad aim -Cooper Simpson

Bradley is Sexi;P just kidding!!! fatty

What did the starving kid say to the starving parent? Pineapple

How do you make a plumer cry? Kill his family

You wanna hear a touching story? Once a pon a time you died. The end. (all anti jokes posted by me will be adressed with -blarg)

Roses are Red grass is greener every time i think of you i touch my weiner

What's worse that finding a worm in your apple? Half the holocaust

Yo mama so dumb she got hit by a bus and didn't know! The funeral was touching and sad. Everyone cried. 2 weeks later..........Johnson ended his own life.......

Do you want to hear a joke? Well you can't because you are reading this

what does lady gaga and a vacuum have in common? nothing. lady gaga is a human and the other is a house hold item.

Roses are red, violets are blue! Damn, the florist messed up the colors again!

Why didn't the millionaire jump off the Golden Gate Bridge? He said "I don't have to commit suicide, that's for poor people" (Wyndellberg)

A man sees the doctor. "Doctor, if I hit myself on my head, it hurts, if I hit myself on my arm, it hurts, and if I hit myself on my leg, it hurts as well." "The case is clear. You need to f*ing stop hitting yourself!"

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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