What's green, has four legs and falls from trees? A praying mantis that lost a battle and had it's frongt two legs removed causing it to lose balance and gripand plumet groundward from the tree.

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How do you poop without it splashing? clench clench, release, clench clench, release, clench, release, clench, release.

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i went to have a wank over anime as well yesterday, the i realised i dont have a penis. -adam fantuzzi

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Why was the Mexican in the back of a pick up truck? There were not any available seats.

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A man drops a penny between a Jew and a homosexual. The man says "oh excuse me," picks up his penny and continues with his day.

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There once was a man from berlin He knocked on a door to go in He got such a fright When the house did ignite That he never went knocking again

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Justin Bieber is so gay he dates girls

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How many wooden chairs can a black man staple to a whales forehead? 27 because Helen Keller does not like blueberries.

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A woman goes into the supermarket and buys a single banana, a canned meal for one and some ice cream. While paying for her items, the cashier looks up at her and says "I can tell you're single" "Oh yeah? How'd you know?" The woman asks. "Because you're ugly as fuck." Replies the cashier.

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Johnny walked up to his teacher one day and asked her to explain to him how babies were made. She instead whispered back to him, "Let me show you". He declined, because he wasn't prepared to be a father.

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Whats funny about a kid with down syndrome q: a lot of things, like his face

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why did the man leave the restaurant? because he was done with his meal

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1)Did you hear about the sick juggler? 2)No... 1) He just couldn't stop throwing up!!!! 2)Oh no!! Is he ok?? 1)He's dead. 2)HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA c&h

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187

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Q: what's black and white and red all over? A: someone getting murderd on a news paper

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What do you call a black person flying a plane? A pilot

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Why was the Asian terrible at driving? He was drunk.

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Roses are Brown Violets are Brown Whos been shitting on my garden??

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What do you get when a fat kid eats a donut... A Heart Attack.

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Did you hear the joke about the deaf man? Neither did he.

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What do you get when you cross something with another thing that one would normally not cross with the aforementioned noun? A better love story than Twilight.

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What's flatter than a pancake? The baby I just ran over.

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A man walks into a bar. He is promptly taken to the hospital where he finds out that he may have a concussion.

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How do you stop a baby from spinning round a washing line. Hit it in face with a baseball bat.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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