aggie wilkinson, i WOULD!!!!!

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because he was an animal with a small brain and could not comprehend the situation.

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An old man walks into a bar. He drinks 3 beers and dies. The bartender calls paramedics but when the police came they arrested the bartender for beating his wife. A few hours later an earthquake destroys the bar and everyone was evacuated and many were injured. The manager was driving to the scene but has a car accident with the ambulance. It was such a bad day.

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- Knock Knock. - Who is it? - I am - I am what? - I am dying please help me. - Sorry, I don't speak with strangers.

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Last Christmas, I gave you my heart, but the very next day, your body rejected the transplant and you died.

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How do you get a jewish girls number check her wrist

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A black man and a white man crash their cars. they promptly exchange insurance information and apologize to each other about the inconvenience.

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Why was six afraid of seven? Because seven's bigger.

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Why did the kid lay down? Because his legs were chopped off

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Me:Oh wait, I got a joke! Friends:Oh boy, what is it? Tell us! Me:..my grandma died.. *Everyones silent* Some random guy:Oh haha, I get it! Me:Shut up, you have no friends. Some random guy: Oh........

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Knock knock. Who's there? It's the police, mam. We need to speak to you about your son Robert. It's the police, mam. We need to speak to you about your son Robert who? Mam, he was in an accident. Could you open the door please?

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Exercise Ex - Er - Cise Ex - Ar - Size.. Eggs Are Sides For bacon.. BACON

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eyebrows up means ur flirting this isnt a joke dont laugh

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Q: What's worse than having a terrorist throw a fridge at you? A: World War 5

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Why did Justin Beiber cross the road? He didn't because he is still in the closet!

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I once did __________ (went to Hawaii, drank a whole gallon of beer, etc. ), but then I woke up. Works with anything, and people will laugh.

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What would a man say if you urinated all over his legs? WHAT THE DEUCE?

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Roses are red, Violets are violet. The man who wrote this, Was high as shit.

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How do you put an elephant in a taxi? You open the door, make sure the elephant is seated confortably, and close the door.

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did you hear about the guy who got his left leg and left arm cut off? he suffered severe blood loss and is most likely dead.

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If you were a booger..................... I would get a tissue so i could blow my nose.

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Ben: do you want to hear a joke. jack: yh go on then, i bet its funny. Ben: Your future.

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"How high are you?" "I don't know, sir." "Well, look at the god damn altimeter."

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Creationism.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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