What does a banana and a helicopter have in common? Neither of them are a police officer.

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Why do elephants paint there feet yellow? so they can hide in mustard bottles. Have you ever seen an elephant in a mustard bottle? exactly

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A man walks into a bar. He I then taken to the hospital for a major head injury.

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What is funnier than dead babies? Dead babies aren't funny, Carlos Mencia and Tom Bergeron are funny.

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What's a ghost's favorite color? Usually whatever their favorite color was in life.

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What did the man say when he saw a truck in his yard? There's a truck in my yard.

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The once was a little girl named Suzy who liked swings; the only trouble was that she had no arms. In order to avoid having any jokes written (and recycled thousands of times) about this fact, she decided to run a sponsored marathon in order to pay for prosthetic arms. Suzy swung happily for the rest of her days. [L]

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Roses are red, Here's something new. Violets are violet, Not f***ing blue.

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Whats worse than getting raped by a monkey The fact that you actually got raped by a monkey

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Robin, Get in the Car

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what do a pizza and a jew have in common? they both burn in an oven

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Q: Why did you fall of that swing? A: Because I'm fat.

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Why do blondes where pigtails? Because they look nice.

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what's blue and white and red all over? -nothing the "red all over" part implies a contradiction to blue and white.

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a blond readhead and a brunnett were driving to Miami, they saw a sign for next exit Miami, turned off the exit went to the beach did some shopping and all had a great time together.

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Frown is a four letter word.

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Why are rich people so rich? they're not poor.

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A black man and a mexican are falling off a cliff. Who lands first? The police officer.

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A horse walks into a bar. The bartender asks, "Why the long face?" The horse replies " My daughter just died of leukemia."

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a horse walks into a bar, the bartender says "why the long face?", the horse incapable of understanding the English language promptly shits on the floor and eats a bar stool.

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A loving father took his two children to the park for a picnic. while the children went into the lake for a swim he drowned them both

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Did you hear about the Asian boy that entered the piano competition? He died yesterday.

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What's worse than breaking your leg? Finding out that your family has died due to an infection causing all of them to perish in horrible deaths

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Where did little Sally go after the explosion? Everywhere

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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