Whats pink and looked like an angry bulldog? Your moms vagina last night

Wanna hear something half funny 34.5

Your in Thailand on a Elephant ride... at the end you jump off but uncle jack is still on the elephant and the elephant wont let him off.... Do you help your uncle, Jack off the elephant?

What did the coin said when it got flipped ? Nothing, coins do not have sufficient requirements to be able to talk like we humans do.

Vote this up or I'll tell my mum!

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=LPFTeHEsAS4 You will not be disappointed.

Q:What is a black guy running with an iPod in his hand? A: A person who enjoys to listen to music while running.

Knock Knock. Who's there? Doctor. Doctor Who? Doctor Watson - I'm here to see your little sister who is currently terminally ill and every second is of vital importance. Therefore this exchange of words is only worsening the already terrible situation that we find ourselves in. Please open the door.

What do you get if you mix a Bulldog and a Shih tzu? A new breed of dog.

a man sees a monkey playing the drums at first he thought it waz the guy in the monkey suit that plays the drums but on closer inspection he sees that it is in fact a real monkey on that note he tries to befriend the monkey but the monkey soon tore the man into pieces

Why don't women need watches? Because they have clocks on their cell phones because they have jobs outside of the house and are INDEPENDENT WOMEN! MEN DO NOT DEFINE THEM!

Samantha ate 62 cookies. Then she ate 300 more. How many did she eat after that? None she didn't for the next 6 years after developing an eating disorder.

What do you call a white guy with a taller black woman? A man in a deeply committed relationship.

A black man walks into a bar. The bartender, upon seeing him, asks him to leave. The black man is enraged by the blatant racism shown by this man, and proceeds to punch the bartender repeatedly. After 5 minutes of non-stop punching the man stops, looks at his victim, and is filled with remorse. He is dead. Upon looking around, the black man notices scaffolding and building equipment scattered around the room. He falls to the ground as he realizes the bar is still under construction, and unable to serve customers this early in development. The bartender was simply asking the man to leave for his own safety.

Q: What do you call a white man with 5 black men? A: A friendly white man. Q: What do you call a white man with a hundred black man? A: A tourist in Kenya.

What's worse than being caught in a downpour? Having your kneecaps ripped out of their sockets.

I like to use vasoline during sex. I put it on the doorknob so she can't escape.

How do you stop a car from hitting a kid? You don't.

What's black and white and red all over? Nothing.

Why can't black people be in a talent show? Because they'll steal the show.

Why did the man name his boy "Sue?" He had bad eyesight and thought it was a girl.

XD, Okay, but you gotta marry me too XD Its working again I am skipping class tonight, how about you come by uh, the day after tomorrow? And bring condoms I don't have any.

What did the girl say when she was getting raped? "Stop, you're hurting me."

"Do you know the joke about the No and Me Neither?" "No..." "Me neither."

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

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The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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