What's red and weighs a metric ton? An apple, my scale wasn't calibrated

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why did ben perve on the 5 year old girl he is a pedofile

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Woody Allen once said, "I have had many romantic relationships in my life that were both complex and humorous."

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Q: What do you call a basement full of blondes? A: A whine cellar.

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What is lazy? My balls. All they do is hang.

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Why couldn'nt Sally swing on the swing? Because Sally was a carrot

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i like candy and other things that are edible... please dont thumbs down just cuz this suxxx just put thumbs up and santa claus will haunt u :)

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what do you call something that dosint exist? nothing.

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Where did the AIDS victim go on vacation? To the hospital.

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What's the difference between a black man and a park bench? Sitting on a black man is just plain rude.

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Is this the Krusty Krab? No, this is Patrick.

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WHat did REAAAALLLY Jesus say when, walking on, wat, er?, Will somebody please get me of this floating piece of ice? Please? Stop screaming HALLELUJAH! People: HALLELUJAH!

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What do you call a man with a gun in his mouth? Keith.

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How do you confuse a chicken? Paint yourself black and throw seeds at it.

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A mexican and a black guy are in a car. Who's driving? The chauffer, they are both rich business men.

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what did the beaver so to the rattle snake? snap your bagles

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There are two types of people in this world, those that can extrapolate from incomplete data

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Frog-why did the chicken cross the road Chicken-dont judge me...

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Knock Knock Come in! :)

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Jokes are dumb. Stories are better. Did you ever hear the story of the blind man who walked into the fish market and said, "Evenin' ladies!"?

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ask me if im a boy are you a boy? none of your buisness.

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Bin Laden: dang, these pizza guys are so late, this pizza better be free! door: Ring ring ring.. Bin Laden: yes its finally here!

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Who would win in a chess duel between Ender Wiggin and Artemis Fowl? Artemis Fowl will calculate the optimal path to move his pieces. Ender Wiggin will calculate the optimal path to kill the queen, so all the other pieces just sort of fall down.

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a. how did you shoot the rabbit? b. with my banana

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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