Why did Max drink the red Gatorade? Because he likes it more than all of the other flavors.

Roses are red Violets are blue get down or i will shoot

What do you call a man with bananas in his ears? A doctor. He is clearly mentally unstable, and probably in pain.

Why did the girl pee her pants? She was only 1 month old...

Q; What is pink and has 2 legs? A: Not a lot of things, but a Flamingo is the closest thing that I could think of if you do not count the beak eyes and feet.

On monday morning the doctor walked into a patient's room, then he walked out after a quick check up.

Roses are black, violets are black. I'm blind.

-When is a door not a door? -Never

catlin: hi Thomas: shut up bich 12 assssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssss2sssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssss2ssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssss2ssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssss2ssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssss2ssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssss sssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssl;

Why did the little pig squeal? Because he was going through blades at a slaughter house.

Why did the baby cry? His dad was holding him upside down over a fire.

A man and woman walk into a funeral home. They are both very sad about the loss of their father who they loved dearly.

what do you call a guy with no arm and legs laying by the door? Matt! what do you call a guy with no arms and legs floating on water Bob!

So a man walks into a bar, He says, "Hey bartender! Can I have some beer?" The bartender says, "Sure!" and hands the man a Bud Light. The man drinks the Bud Light and leaves afterward.

what do you call 69 babies in one room? a room full of babies

I hate when Harry Potter showers in my Potatoes....

why couldn't the bicycle stand up on it's own? because it was two tired

What's hairy and sags? A ball sack

Roses are red Violets are blue I'll choke you with a hose

Did you hear about the toddler that was playing on the swing? He got abducted.

Whats the difference between the floor and the ceiling? One of them is higher!

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OneBigAssMistakeAmerica

Why can't Amy winehouse drive? She's dead.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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