Ok so 3 guys walk into a bar... the fourth one ran.

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if you have hair on the palm of your hand you might want to get that checked out

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Q: Why did the black man run from the chainsaw? A: Someone was trying to kill him with it.

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knock knock who's there me me who? me me me me who? me me me me me me who? and the more the joke continues the less funny and more annoying it gets

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What direction do 5 gay guys walk? I am unable to answer that because they are all aspiring to work in different occupational fields.

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How many dead babies would it take to plug the Fukushima Dai-Ichi nuclear power plant? None -- they are using thousands of litres of liquid glass coagulant instead.

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what's worse than getting an unwarranted parking ticket? Serving a life sentence for killing the meter man.

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Knock Knock. Who's there? Dementia.

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Why did Helen Kellers dog run away? It didn't. She did not own a dog.

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A man walks into a bar. He buys a beer, drinks it and walks out.

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Why did they bury the firefighter behind the hill? Because he was dead.

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why did the duck swim upside-down -he was on quack

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A blind man walks off a cliff.

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Is this your pen? I wanna go to school, bye!

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Why did the girl eat a sandwich? because she was thirsty

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Never again, I have all the intel I need on you, you cost me a fucking eye, you think I would let go of that so easily? It hurts day and night, I have not slept in days, my fucking eyelid is torn right off, and while I use a fucking excuse for an eyepatch, I still have not gotten used to sleep without being able to shut both my eyes, I have a constant fever, you miss me, you are directly responsible for scaring my wife and fucking over my face. Deal with it, cry harder asshole. Moral: You step on my foot, I break off yours, you cost me an eye, you do not know whats waiting in line for you, I am going to make you beg me to let you die! Did you think I would warm up as quickly to something as irresponsible as you? And we do not know yet if you did this on purpose, we do not even live in the same fucking country, and I get assholes assaulting me again! What the hell have you done? If my wife had been here I would have been dead! Moral: I hope you got pets, I will skin them alive in front of your face!

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Two penguins in a bath tub, one says "Pass me the soap" and the other one says "What do you think I am, a radio!"

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I hope you take your own wise words to heart Nero, how would you like to claim to be me and get our ship somewhat on land before it all goes to pieces? After all I have been claiming to be you for a long long time.

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What did one traffic light say to the other? Nothing, as traffic lights are incapable of thought as they are not living.

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BARRACK OBAMA.............WHAT A JOKE!!!!!

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What do you get when you cross an l with a line? A t.

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What did Steve say when his leg got chopped off? Nothing, he went into a state of shock before blacking out due to loss of blood. Later on, he died, and a week later, a funeral was held, in which nobody showed up, because nobody cared for Steve.

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your amazing just the way you are... even though you have aids.

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What happens when you cut down a tree? It falls down.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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