what happens when you throw a rock in the water? it gets wet

What has one eye, three arms and one leg? A really weird person.

Why did the chicken cross the road? Because it was playing Pokemon Go.

Why did the chicken cross the road? What kind of society have we created that a chicken can't even cross a road without his motives being questioned?

How can you tell if a substance is an acid or a base just by looking at it? You can't. pH or Litmus paper would be necessary in order to determine whether a substance is an acid or a base.

So there's this bigass moose, and it goes in the store and it asks the lady bitch "where the potatoes at" and the lady bitch says "down aisle 5" so the moose goes down to isle 5 and there aint no potatoes.

Reality is often boring. TV is often bad for you. Reality TV is boring AND bad for you.

What was so special about Anna Frank's diary? Nothing. --ZeNaziGermanDoctor

Why was the black man tangled in chains at the bottom of the ocean? Because he was a highly skilled diver and environmentalist who tragically entangled himself and consequently died slowly and painfully of suffocation while trying to save a whale from eating waste metal.

Why did the chicken cross the road? To save his failing marriage.

What's the difference between a duck?

Why did it take so long for the baby's to paint my wall? I didn't throw them hard enough.

What do you call a black guy driving an airplane? A pilot

Why did the chicken cross the road? Because the farmer lacked basic fence mending skills

What do you get when you make a website to put jokes on? People repeating the same joke over and over again, and still managing to get good ratings.

what did the policeman say to an armed robber? you can go, as long as you don't hurt my doughnuts

What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? The Holocaust.

knock knock no no you go now i clean

What's green and has wheels? Grass. I was kidding about the wheels.

roses are red violets are blue last time I saw u were in a zoo don't worry ill be there to not in a cage but laughing at u

Why was six afraid of seven? Because seven was a terrorist.

What's worse than forgetting how to spell? asghasonbma.

What did the polar bear say to the penguin? Nothing because polar bears lived in the northern hemisphere and penguins lived in the southern. But if one is smuggled from north to south or vice-versa. The polar would growl and consume the penguin.

Why was the jew so happy? He won the lottery which at the time was 3.40 dollars

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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