A man was having problems with his computer, so he called customer service. An Indian man, by the name of Muhammad picked up the phone. This came of no surprise to the man, because Muhammad is the most common name in the world. The man soon found and fixed the problem on his computer and hung up.

thumb_up thumb_down -7

What's Black, White, and Red all over? A Cow in a giant blender...

thumb_up thumb_down +2

awkies when jamie and jacob hook up, and u have to tell the dog..i maen danni that this has been going on for 2 months

thumb_up thumb_down +21

What do you get when you combine a cat and a dog? A Cog

thumb_up thumb_down +13

What is worse than banging your knee on the coffee table? Tripping over one of the legs and smacking your head on the floor, causing a severe concussion.

thumb_up thumb_down +12

hows your wife she died 7 years ago really mine too

thumb_up thumb_down -24

Do you know what lmnop is? No. A group of five consecutive letters.

thumb_up thumb_down -24

Whats worse than burning jews? jews that are alive

thumb_up thumb_down -2

What do you call a medical student who finishes last in his class? Doctor.

thumb_up thumb_down -10

what did the nazi say to the jew? hi

thumb_up thumb_down -15

Whats more fun than swinging a baby around on a clothesline at 200 miles per hour ? Stopping it with a shovel

thumb_up thumb_down -1

Once upon a time there was a cowboy. He died. The end.

thumb_up thumb_down +4

What did goldilocks say to the three bears? she was savagely murdered before she could say anything.

thumb_up thumb_down +8

Hey diddle diddle, the cat and the fiddle, the cow jumped over the salamander, macaroni and cheese.

thumb_up thumb_down -2

Did u hear about the jew that bought something not on sale? Neither did i.

thumb_up thumb_down -3

This is not a joke, I'm just bored (or am I?)

thumb_up thumb_down -9

What is fat and white? A polar bear with a glandular problem.

thumb_up thumb_down +16

Why wasn't the man able to see his son? He got run over by a train. Knock knock Who's there? The man. He was kidding about being run over.

thumb_up thumb_down

What has ears, but can't hear, eyes, but can't see, a mouth, but can't talk, and legs, but can't walk? A deaf and blind paraplegic with an improperly functioning larynx.

thumb_up thumb_down +8

What does AIDS smell like? AIDS has no smell. AIDS is a diease contracted though sexual contact with another being with the diease. It greatly increases the risk of infections and malignancy. Although AIDS has no smell, in the final stages large sores develope on the surface of the skin. This means you are going to die. Thus, HIV/AIDS has no smell.

thumb_up thumb_down +3

An irish man calls a black man a nigger. The offended black man then proceeds to ravenously beat the Irish man's head into a nearby curb.

thumb_up thumb_down +40

Q: How do get a person to leave you alone ? A: Suck out his eye-balls stuff them in your ears to muffle the sound of his screaming as you head-butt him into a fine paste. Then proceed to spread or squeeze sed paste on to delicious food substance and eat sed delicious food substance. Then carry on with the rest of your day like nothing happened. (P.S. Just ignore any letters about court cases or arrests)

thumb_up thumb_down -4

Justin Bieber

thumb_up thumb_down -24

Roses are red Zombies are hungry and blue My brain is half-eaten And what about you?

thumb_up thumb_down -13

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops