Opinions are like assholes... ...they're both nouns.

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An epileptic man attends a rave.

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Redneck girls. Now there's a joke.

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I'm on the seafood diet. I eat clams and shrimp because it is healthy for me.

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A man is talking nonsense at a wall when another man walks up to him. "Why are you talking at a wall?" "I'm trying to appease the mighty wall god Kaleothayrhonka." "Cool, let me join you!" And they both talk at the wall for hours on end because they are stupid that way.

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justin Beiber is gay. what else is there to say...

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when Bonquisha and Letroy had a baby girl what did they name her? Courtney.

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How does a boy with no arms or legs cross the street? He doesn't

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Why can't Hellen Keller drive? Because she's a woman

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How did the pig solve the Arab-Israeli Conflict? It didn't. It further exacerbated the problem. The Arab-Israeli Conflict is a multifaceted geopolitical quagmire based on long-simmering religious, ethnic and territorial tensions. A pig is too stupid to understand the root causes of the problem, let alone provide a viable solution. In retrospect, it seems ridiculous to have entrusted a pig with such an important diplomatic mission.

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Whats the best day of the week? Sponge

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Peer pressure

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Why are there no Jews in hell? Because Hitler is there,

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What's the same between a plane a bird and a piece of celery? They all fly except the celery

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I was walking down the street next thing I new 15 blacks and Hispanics died in a dive buy. The next day every white guy in the cars doin the drive buy blew up ohwell

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There is no I in Pie except for the I

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what do Russians play? Tetris, what else?

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How many republicans does it take to screw in a lightbulb? Typically only one, though more may be required under extreme conditions.

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A rabbi walks into a bar, in traditional Jewish garb. The bartender takes one look at him and says "Sorry, you'll have to leave". The Jewish gentleman says "Why, don't you serve Jews in here?". The bartender replies "Of course we do, but we just found asbestos in the walls and we're closing for remodeling." The rabbi politely apologizes for making misplaced assumptions about the bartender's place of business.

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Fun fact: Steel wool comes from the fleeces of iron sheep.

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What's worse than eating a baby? Eating two babies filled with maggots.

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What's Tyrion Lannister short for? It's not short for anything, it's his full name.

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What is the hardest thing about eating a vegetable? the wheelchair

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hello there i am a male from the small town of balamory and i have just found a very large oblong with an acute right angle strongly attached to the left hand side........do you think i should hand it to the new york extra torestial services ?

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

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The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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