Roses are red, Violets are blue. I have a gun! So I KILL YOU!!!!

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2 men shot up a morgue, 16 bodies remain dead

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What's the difference between a plum and a bunny? They're both purple. Except the bunny.

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How many Mexicans does it take to screw in a light-bulb? Probably one. Replacing a light-bulb is a pretty simple task which any person (regardless of ethnicity) should be able to do without assistance.

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What do you call 100 dead babies in my garage? Murder.

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No!

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Q. Why did the chicken cross the road? A. Why dont you ask the chicken.

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whats worse then getting sat on by a hippo getting sat on by Matt Ross

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A white guy, a black guy, an Asian guy, and a Hispanic guy walks into a bar. The white guy orders a beer, the black guy orders a shot of vodka, the Asian guy orders a sake, and the Hispanic guy orders a shot of tequila. They were drinking and having a great time.

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whos a sick fuck? jake morris

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What did the woman say to the dog? Stop shitting on my carpet your dickhole

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What did Buzz say to Woody? A lot. There were 3 movies.

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Wanna hear a Harry Potter joke? Knock Knock Who's there? You know You know who?

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Why doesn't the chicken wear pants? Beacuse its pecker is on its face.

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How did the asian find his family? He didn't because they all look the same.

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two goldfish are in a tank they swim around happily and have no consciousness of what is happening because of their short memory.

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Who didn't let the gorilla into the ballet? The people who were in charge of that decision.

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How do you wake up lady gaga? You poker face.

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what starts with F and ends with ead? Fred was walking to school one day when he heard a strange noise in a tree. He walked up to the tree, looked up, and saw a cat. Fred was late for class, so he decided to go to school and help the cat out after school. Eight hours later, Fred came up to the tree and looked up to see if the cat was there. It wasn't. The cat was lying next to the tree, dead.

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A horse walks into a bar and the bartender asks, "Why the long face" To which the horse replies by trampling him to death for making rude remarks about his face.

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Life's like a box of chocolates it's shit if you have diabetes

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What do you call a Gay leprechaun? A homosexual ginger man with a pretty green outfit.

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Why did the boy fail gym? He had cancer and had to amputate both of his legs.

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what would george washington do if he was alive today? he would scream and scratch his coffiin

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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