What does a gay horse eat? HEEEEEEYYYYYY!

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I'll have a chocolate milkshake, hold the onions.

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Guy A turns to Guy B and says, 'Hey, can I use your cellphone to call my mom?" Guy B nods and says, "Yeah, sure, just press redial." Guy B had been planning an surprise party for Guy A and had called Guy A's mother for ideas.

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what is a present you would give a werewolves? I said... OBAMA!!! tee hee

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because it was a bad chicken and it burned in hell.

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What's the best way to cross the road? Ideally with your feet and legs, consdiering as disabled people usually don't recommend their unfortunate state of affairs. However there are other alternatives which may or may not be better than common or garden walking, such as crane hire - crossing in a crane bucket in a safe spot; chauffer driven limos, which don't do the straight, direct route, generally; and being carried on a replica of Cleopatra's carry couch (but with modern suspension, unless you prefer the up and down motion)

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What's green and fuzzy and would hurt a lot if it fell out of a tree and hit you? A pool table

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What do you do when there is a truck on the interstate? Nothing.

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How do u kill a horse? U stab it with a huge butcher knife

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What do you call a kid with no arms and an eyepatch? Names.

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How many pancakes does it take to make a dog house? Purple because, ice-cream has no bones.

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Knock knock. Who's there. To get to the other side.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? To get to the idiot's house... Knock knock Who's there? The Chincken

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shit is shit, even if you paint it purple; its still shit

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A dyslexic man walks into a bra. It was hanging on a clothes line he didn't see, the fact that he was dyslexic is irellevant.

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My name is me I like fired chicken!

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A black guy, Jewish guy, Chinese guy and a normal guy walk into a bar. They were all normal but the race of the last guy could not be easily determined.

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:)I will always assist you in whatever you ever want. :(I want to kill you!

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Can midgets still have big dreams?

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Roses are red. Violets blue i do fuck people. MAYBE u too?

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too bad about that wild ball, you otherwise played a fantastic softball game

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Helena: Can u get me a pencil? Me: Sure. Me: Mr. Brandmeyer can u give me a pencil? Mr. Brandmeyer: Why? Me: I don't know. That's what Helena said.

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Tough crowd tonight...

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What do you call a fly without wings? A rather unfortunate physical disability

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops