Why did the young girl fall off of the swing set? Because a man came up behind her and pushed her. He then picked her up, brought her home and fed her a nice three course meal and put her to bed. When she woke up she snuck out of the house and alerted the police.

The husbant is back from work. He opens the door of closet and finds... Narnia.

How do get a baby to stop crawling in circles? Nail its other hand to the floor.

I used to be able to walk, but then I took an arrow to the knee. It tore my acl and shattered my kneecap.

Q.What happens when you win a trophy? A. You don't, there is always someone better than you.

What did the duck say? Nothing. Everyone knows that ducks can't talk.

Q:What's red and fluffy? A: A blue rock, if blue were red and rocks were fluffy

"You know what my motto in life is?" "No" "Oh, that's a shame."

How to you scare a paraplegic? Point a gun at him.

A Priest a Rabbi and a duck walk into a bar. The rest of the patrons continue to drink until the situation seems less strange.

Whats red and hairy ? A carpet !

Like if you have a vagina. Also like if you have a dong. (Penis)

How do you blindfold a Chinese man? With a blindfold.

What did the boy with no arms and no legs get for his birthday? a new bike.

Yo mama so poor that she's having trouble making ends meet without government assistance.

Why do black people have white hands? Palms and soles are not in direct sunlight, and therefore less amounts of melanin are produced in those regions.

Rose's are red, violet's are blue. Rose's die and viloets are more purple.

Q) How do you get 100 midgets into a Mini? A)You have to manufacture a Mini large enough to accommodate 100 midgets. It wouldn't be street-legal, but at least the problem of getting 100 midgets into a Mini is solved.

Why can't Hellen Keller drive? She's a women.

Q:If Ryan Vallee walks into a room what do you do? A:Walk out -Ryan V

why did your mum die young because she had canser

Why did the woman leave the kitchen? She had just prepared her breakfast and was late for her full-time job as a firefighter.

So a Quadriplegic walks into a bar.....

What did the two prostitute say to each other? I dont know, i wasn't there

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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