How do you make a baby crawl in circles? Nail its hand to the ground

thumb_up thumb_down +16

whats brown and stickey? a brown stick

thumb_up thumb_down -19

Raveena Thandhan

thumb_up thumb_down +32

A ship wrecks in the South Pacific ocean. Only one man survives. He swims to a semi-deserted island, and is later eaten by the cannibal inhabitants

thumb_up thumb_down +6

What is it called when a whole bunch of black people run down a hill? A race.

thumb_up thumb_down -24

So there's this cup that I own... I use it to aid in the drinking of my hot or cold beverages.

thumb_up thumb_down +11

Q: What is black and white, black and white, black and white? A: A Nun falling down the stairs.

thumb_up thumb_down -6

What does DNA stand for? The National Association of Dislexics.

thumb_up thumb_down -7

Why are we on a roof? Becuse some idiot gave us all roofies.

thumb_up thumb_down +22

What happens when Terran Hansen has sex with a cow? Jesse Z.

thumb_up thumb_down -30

What do you call a bear in the rain? A wet bear.

thumb_up thumb_down +2

Several of our "name brothers" have been attacked threatened and questioned almost every night since when we last talked on the phone, it turns out that these people are not after me. But after you, they have no idea that I retired years ago, and while their information is limited, you got yourself someone that is selling information on the deep web intentionally, as far as we know he might be selling you out piece by piece, and as of this point, you might be in dire danger.

thumb_up thumb_down -31

What did the chubby, dirty, hobo get for Christmas? Cancer

thumb_up thumb_down -37

How many frogs does it take to change a light bulb None. Frogs lack the cranial capacity to change said lightbulb. If eventually by evolution they become smart enough to change lightbulbs, they may learn to handle machinery and pose a real threat to humans.

thumb_up thumb_down +27

Whats worse them finding a worm in your apple??? finding out your adopted

thumb_up thumb_down

Just want to know where I will be dipping my... MANFLESH!

thumb_up thumb_down -2

What's worse than your console not switching on? A mutilated body.

thumb_up thumb_down +6

What are little Timmy's hopes and dreams? Destroyed.

thumb_up thumb_down -53

What is worse then falling into a lava pit? Nothing you idiot.

thumb_up thumb_down +21

A plane crashed. The pilot was some sort of food, like a loaf of bread or a salad. Neither of which can fly a plane or do much of anything-- like get a plane to move in the first place, let alone take off.

thumb_up thumb_down +2

Whats the difference between a dead cat and a woman. The cat had a life.

thumb_up thumb_down -41

What did the young boy get for Christmas? All his brothers belongings because his brother died

thumb_up thumb_down +3

Biggest lie in America: Sorry, that was my last stick of gum.

thumb_up thumb_down +23

Whats worse than biting into an apple and finding half a worm? Half a shit.

thumb_up thumb_down -15

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops