Q.How do you kill a Zombie? A. You can't Zombies are fictional monsters that do not exist in our reality. instead why not focus on killing other things such as, Terrorists, Ants and People who piss you off

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Why did the black man get fired? In this economy businesses are downsizing and outsourcing jobs for cheaper labor.

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Joe Paterno walks into a police station.

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What do you call a deer with one eye? Injured.

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Type better antijokes above

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all jokes aside...

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Have you seen Ray Charles' new house? Neither has he...

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What's the only thing better than winning a gold medal at the Special Olympics? Not being retarded.

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A bear woke up from his annual hibernation to find that his stomach is growling. "I sure am hungry." the sleepy bear said. So he found some berries, but spit them out. "These berries are far too bitter." the playful bear said. He then found some honey, however was soon bombarded with a swarm of bees. "That honey is good, but not that good." the jolly bear said. He then stumbled upon a cabin. "I wonder if there is any food in here..." the curteous bear wondered. The events that followed are now reffered to by the locals as the May 20th Massacre. While no witnesses survived, the police reports depict that the Martinez family, a young family of 7 enjoying their memorial day weekend in their New Hampshire cabin, was brutally slain by a blood-thirsty animal who tracked each of them throughout the house in a period of approximately 45 minutes.

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Knock knock Who's there? A robber Oh

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Why didn't Helen Keller learn to drive as a teenager? They didn't have cars back then.

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An obese man walked into McDonalds and ordered 6 Big Macs. He proceeded to walk to a booth in the back corner and eat them all. Turns out he was white.

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Q: Why was 2 afraid of 3? A: Cause 3 4 5!

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What's better than sex? Nothing

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What do you call a man in front of three trains that have explosives tied to them and that are making amazingly loud noises? An idiot who obviously can't identify danger and probably had a childhood injury that cause his life to be ruined forever most likely cause by an evil uncle.

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SKnock Knock. Whose there? Why don't you open the door and find out instead of questioning the millions of other people that knock on your door everyday?

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roses are red, violets are blue, I talk to myself, and so do it I.

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My computer crashed today I was watching porn.

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I want seaman but sex with interracial men body builders. Please call me - 843-813-2788

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Q: What did the Jewish man get for Christmas? A: Nothing, he's Jewish.

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why was the little boy sad? because he had a frog stapled to his face.

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Why did the woman fall off her bike? She got hit by a car door

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Why did Timmy fall off the swing? Because he was dead

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What's worse than the Holocaust? Biting into an orange and finding Helen Kellar

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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