If I have 7 oranges in one hand and 8 oranges in the other, what do I have? Big hands!

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Why wasn't my T.V. on? Because I didn't have a remote.

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Roses are Black Violets are Black I am color blind.

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hahah there are so funny that they are so funny that they are so litteral that i make my self make other people laugh so that they poop

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Antijoke the book. Seriously it sucks ass, do not bother, they only included the very worst ones.

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why did the mexican cross the road? to catch its bus on the other side

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Why did Sally fall off the swing? Because she had no arms. :D

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what do you get when you stick a pair of scissors in a four year old? an erection.

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vote this down and i will DOX you

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how do you know if your pleasuring a woman? who cares

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You know whats worse than finding a fly in your soup? 9/11

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Need For Speed 30025 DRIVE OVER 60000 EXTREME CARS OVER 60 BILLION REAL LIFE GRAPHICS TRACKS! WHILE LISTENING TO BULLSHIT SONGS THAT MAKE YOU CRY! NO PAUSE BUTTON! EVERY CAR MUST BE UNLOCKED BY PLAYING THE SAME TRACK (Yeah music track too) OVER AND OVER AGAIN! OVER 6000000 ONLINE GAMERS AT THE SAME TIME WORLDWIDE, EACH TRACK HAS 5000000 THOUSAND LAPS SO THE FUN NEVER ENDS! UNLOCK ALL STUFF DLC: 6000 Bucks. Moral: So I have not been here since I called myself the sociopath or something, who the fuck are these Nero`s and Neronism and all that fuck? :( They almost improved my reputation! THATS HORRIBLE!

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What's the difference between a cup of tea and a polar bear? A polar bear is a bear whilst a cup of tea is a beverage

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Q. have you seen stevie wonders last album? A. neither has he.

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What should you do if you come across a slut with a fork up her @ss and a gun in her hand? Do not look at her and walk away.

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So there was a jewish guy, a black guy, and a white guy all sky diving. They all had an amazing time and they all went to a bar later to talk about what they just had experienced.

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Help I'm being raped!

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how do you get a happy man to stop smiling? hit him in the face repeatedly untill he is dead.

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A man walked into a bar.He woke up hours later and went home. By TheRealPaddock

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What's worse than the Holocaust? A second Holocaust. What's worse than a second Holocaust? Being raped by Santa Claus. What's worse than that? NOTHING.

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Why did Sally fall off the swings? Because she had no arms Knock Knock Who's there? Not sally

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Know knock Who's there The fat lady off her medicine ball Call 000

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Why was the boy in the hospital? He was visiting his grandmother, she had cancer and the doctor gave her 3 months to live.

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What happened when the 16 year old told her mother she was pregnant? Her mother was extremely disappointed that her daughter did not stay faithful to an abstinent life but eventually became proud of the fact that she would soon be a grandmother.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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