A man walks into the office for an appointment. The doctor performs the usual examinations, before asking the man to turn his head and cough. As is standard, he feels the man's testicles to check for irregularities. The man jokes, "Say doc, couldn't you at least ask me to dinner first?" The doctor replies, "You have testicular cancer." He died a month later.

thumb_up thumb_down +1

Why did the guy go to the strip club? To look at naked people.

thumb_up thumb_down -5

How much does a dead baby weight? the same amount when it was alive!

thumb_up thumb_down +7

Why did the baby bird have no friends? Because he chose not to socialize with the baby birds.

thumb_up thumb_down -2

Will I be watching The Voice tonight? no.

thumb_up thumb_down -19

A teenager decides to stay home instead of go to college. His parents are fine with his choice since he is mentally ill.

thumb_up thumb_down +1

Roses are red Violets are blue So is your face Cuz I just gagged you

thumb_up thumb_down +14

why did the monkey fall out of the tree? cause it was dead...

thumb_up thumb_down -37

Why did Mary fall off the swings? Because she had no arms. Knock Knock, Whos there, Not Mary

thumb_up thumb_down -3

What happened to the lady living in the present, crossing a street? Let's watch her and find out.

thumb_up thumb_down -5

What's black, white and red all over? A popular novel printed in multiple languages.

thumb_up thumb_down -169

Why didn't Jane text James? Because she was kidnapped.

thumb_up thumb_down -18

After waking up at the break of dawn, a man saw his dogs food dish was empty. In slight excitement for his dog to finally eat after his dish being empty all night, he called his dog in from outside, expecting him to go straight to his food dish like always. The dog walked by without noticing.

thumb_up thumb_down +17

Whats better than a panda? A panda with an ice cream cone.

thumb_up thumb_down +28

Why did John fall off the tree? We were throwing rocks at him.

thumb_up thumb_down +24

Roses are yellow, violets are grey, I'm colorblind

thumb_up thumb_down -1

What did one lawyer say to the other lawyer? We're both lawyers.

thumb_up thumb_down -1

Whats the difference between a sack of babies and a sandwich? A Sand which floats when you put it into a large body of water.

thumb_up thumb_down +24

were you expecting a joke

thumb_up thumb_down -45

Q: How Do you make a baby be quiet? A: slowly chop it's head off with a blunted axe once it's head is off eat it

thumb_up thumb_down +6

lucas sehnoun told me anti-joke was funny

thumb_up thumb_down +14

What do you get when you cross batman and superman? One egotesticul idiot SOB aka mofo ????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????

thumb_up thumb_down -33

How long was the awkward silence it took to make Justin Bieber? Really long.

thumb_up thumb_down -9

A horse walks into a bar... Horses are not indigenous to China.

thumb_up thumb_down +22

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops