A man and his friend walk into a bar. The first man said to the bartender "I'll have a H2O, please." His friend said "Yeah, I'll have a H2O too." The bartended wasn't an idiot and was aware that he was in a bar, not a science lab, and handed them both a bottle of H2O. His friend still died.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? To get to KFC.

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Roses are red Violets are blue I have a knife Take off your clothes

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what did rebecca say to sabrina ? CALL wass !!

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What do you call a deer with no eyes? Blind.

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What's the best way to toss a salad? With a salad spinner from the home shopping network.

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A black man and a mexican jump from a tree. Who hits the ground first? The mexican. The black man had a rope tied around his neck.

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Roses are red, Violets are red, My house is red, I am on fire

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Roses are Red. Violets are Blue. Grandma's dead. call the paramedics.

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Knock, knock. Who's there? John. Oh, hey! Come in.

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roses are black violets are too im colorblind how about you

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because a black man was chasing his dinner.

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what do you get when you have unprotected sex with a hooker? an orgasm

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How do you keep children off your lawn? Touch them.

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why did the little girl fell off the bed? because she saw his father rape her sister after killing his mother years ago, and every time she goes to sleep, she remembers that and the images come back to haunt her

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what did batman day to robin? get in the car robin.

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How did the little boy survive the massacre? He didn't. How did the little girl survive the massacre? She was the killer.

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Roses are red, violets are blue, your face belong in the zoo, don't worry I get there too, not in the cage, just visiting you :)

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A man walks into a bar, he is an alcoholic and is ruining his family.

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why was the old man cold? ...WHY?

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what did I say to myself nothing because its very weird to talk to your self

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why did dinosaurs get extinct? i don't know i was not there to see it!!!!!!!!!

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Why is the fat kid laying on the ground crying? Because I hit him with a shovel

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2 guys are best friends from birth, one goes crazy and kills the others family and feel hatred towards each other for eternity.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops