While I was walking home from school one day, James Brown jumped out of a bush and punched me in the face. Then, when I got home, there was a walrus sitting on my couch. He then turned to look at me and said, "Penis". I then immediately farted out blades of grass.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? The Holocaust.

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Q: What did the boy say to the girl? A: Wanna go to homecoming?

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(Knock Knock) Who's there? You were late paying your mortgage and now your house is being repossessed by the bank.

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What do you call a green dog? A green dog.

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What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? AIDS. AIDS is worse.

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Why did the man break into the bank? Because he was a bank robber

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Hey! How do you do a four strand plait? With four strands.

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Knock Knock! Whos There? Interupting black lady! Interupti. MMMMHHHHMMMM!!!!

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There were 3 children: Flower, Petal and Fridge. Flower asked, "Mum, why is my name Flower?" to which she replied "Because a flower was the first thing to fall on you when you were born." Petal asked, "Mum, why is my name Petal?" to which she replied "Because a petal was the first thing to fall on you when you were born." Fridge said, "Herp derp dur" to which Fridge's mother replied "Shut up, Fridge."

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A rabbit crosses a road... To be continued

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Q: how do you get a live elephant into a refrigerator? A: you buy an industrial sized refrigerator and then walk the elephant slowly but surely through the door.

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YOU WONT GIVE THIS A THUMBS UP!!!! YOU WONT DO ITTTT

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What did the douche bag get for Christmas?

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Q: What do you call 5 white guys sitting on a bench A: The NBA

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What do you call a fly without wings? A walk

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Why did the Japanese man commit suicide? He was terminally ill and decided it was his time to go

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There were 3 children: Flower, Petal and Fridge. Flower asked, "Mum, why is my name Flower?" to which she replied "Because a flower was the first thing to fall on you when you were born." Petal asked, "Mum, why is my name Petal?" to which she replied "Because a petal was the first thing to fall on you when you were born." Fridge said, "Herp derp dur" to which Fridge's mother replied "Shut up, Fridge."

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:Knock Knock :Who's there? :....... No one was there because they were ding dong ditchers.

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Justin Bieber

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What do 9 out of 10 people enjoy? Gangrape.

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Did you see my sandwitch? No. I am your sandwitch, and therefore no one thought to put me up to a mirror. Would you like me to? No. I have no eyes. And why are you talking to a sandwitch??? ...

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what black and white and read all over? a woman who has just been beaten and raped and left to die in the snow.

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How many spiders dose it take to cover a wall? Four, if they are 7 feet tall

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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