Q. What did Batman say to Robin before they got in the car. A. Get in the car.

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Why did Tommy get a wedgie? He was gay, and his parens were dead, so the school bully,decided to wedge his underwear up his butt.

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What did batman say to robin as he got out of the batmobile? robin, shut the door.

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There were 3 children: Flower, Petal and Fridge. Flower asked, "Mum, why is my name Flower?" to which she replied "Because a flower was the first thing to fall on you when you were born." Petal asked, "Mum, why is my name Petal?" to which she replied "Because a petal was the first thing to fall on you when you were born." Fridge asked "Mum, why is my name Fridge?" to which she replied "Because you deserve to be in one."

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Where's Stevin Hawkins? He went for a walk.

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A man walks into a bar. The bartender says, "What can I get for ya?" The man replies, "A beer."

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Roses? are red Violets are blue, Kangaroos like Oranges, Poems suck, Refrigerator.

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What do you call cheese that's not yours? Not your cheese.

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Why did nobody bother to help the old lady cross the road? Because her actions in recent years had given rise to considerable division and ill-feeling within the community.

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What did the dog say to the astro turf? SHUT UP!! I don't want to here your excuses, put the dishes away when you're done with them or so help me! You see the dog had been abused as a puppy and as a result he was always a bit off.

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why was the 6 afraid of the 7? because 7 was a registered 6 offender.

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Who has big eyes, big ears, and a big mouth? The witness I'm about to murder so he cannot testify against me. Wish me luck.

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What do you do with a baby with a broken jaw? Deepthroat.

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Whats worse than a baby stapled to a tree? A tree stapled to a baby

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abcdHIV this disease is killing me

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How many dead babies can you fit in a bathtub? Why are you asking me this question? That's awful and you should be ashamed of yourself.

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What do you call a black guy selling drugs? A pharmacist.

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So, a Bobcat walks into a bar. A few moments later, the bar was empty, save a bobcat and two critically wounded men.

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- Helen Keller

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Did you know Helen Keller has a pool? no oh well she does.

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If you come to Anti-Joke.com to look at the Newest jokes please leave a comment. Thank you!

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What do you call a can of beans? A can of beans.

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Q: What's green, fuzzy, and if it falls out of a tree it will kill you? A: A pool table

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Last Christmas, I gave you my heart, and the very next day, I died because I didn't have a heart.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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