there was an owl, she had a baby, threw up, then died

thumb_up thumb_down +33

Where did Officer Blackman find the missing child? A shallow grave.

thumb_up thumb_down +38

A man dies from a cat attack. he goes up to heaven. At the gates, St. Peter asks him, " how did you die sir?" The man doesn't reply so Peter says, "cat got your tongue?" "No," he says, "cat got my throat!"

thumb_up thumb_down -8

The sun was burning as the Elephant offered the mouse to walk between the sun and the mouse so the mouse could get some shade. Mouse: Lets switch places so you can have some shade too! Elephant: Good idea! Just then unexpectedly the elephant slipped on a banana peel and tilted towards the mouse. Squish. Moral: The reason they never tell kids the full story... for real.. honest...

thumb_up thumb_down -106

Today i decided to burn calories, so I grabbed my lighter from the counter and put it in my pocket and proceeded to the treadmill.

thumb_up thumb_down -19

What did a cat said to another cat? Nothing because cats dont talk.

thumb_up thumb_down +7

What's brown a sticky? -A stick

thumb_up thumb_down +5

Why did the older man begin to walk faster after a black man started walking towards him? He was late for work.

thumb_up thumb_down +3

Why did Suzy drop her ice cream? Because she got hit by a bus. Knock Knock. Who's there? Not Suzy!

thumb_up thumb_down -19

whats funnier than the boy with no arms and legs getting cancer? lebron playing basketball

thumb_up thumb_down +9

Why did a man get arrested in a bar He was covered in bombs and charged with terrorism

thumb_up thumb_down +7

A sheep walks into a baaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa

thumb_up thumb_down +6

Why are Chinese people only allowed one child? Because their government states so.

thumb_up thumb_down +7

Why is 6 afraid of 7... Because 7 raped her little sister

thumb_up thumb_down +34

What did the mollusk say to the sea cucumber? I don't know. Neither of them can talk.

thumb_up thumb_down +40

whats pink and fluffy? candy floss.

thumb_up thumb_down +5

Why did the girl fall off the swing? She had no arms.

thumb_up thumb_down +16

Why did the chicken cross the road? Because he was curious about something that had diverted his attention.

thumb_up thumb_down +17

yfygcugyuyc

thumb_up thumb_down +20

What do a chicken and a grape have in comon? - They're both purple, except for the chicken.

thumb_up thumb_down +12

Why can't Hellen Keller drive? Because she's a woman

thumb_up thumb_down +22

Why can't Osama bin Laden make anymore terrorist attacks? He's dead.

thumb_up thumb_down -34

nick and a mexican were in a falling plane.. nick ate the mexican... that is all..

thumb_up thumb_down +9

A black man shoots some hoops. One of the bullets bounces off the rim and hits him in the eye. The man dies. His grandmother is still alive to attend his funeral.

thumb_up thumb_down +21

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops