A man buys some expensive lingerie for his wife on the occasion of their 10th wedding anniversary. After a lovely candlelight dinner at home, he tells her to close her eyes at which point he retrieves the gift box containing her anniversary present. Thoroughly exited, she rips open the box and takes out the beautiful garment, holding it up to the light in wide-eyed amazement. Her husband gives her a suggestive wink and says "would you like to join me in the bedroom to try it on?" To which she replies, "I AIN'T YER WHORE!"

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why can't James swim at 2010 summer ? because james died at 2009

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If the black man lives in the black house, and the yellow man lives in the yellow house, who lives in the white house? The white man. As unfortunate as it is, racism is still a very integral part of society, and the social dominance the white man holds in countries like America are not to be so quickly forgotten.

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Why was the little boy crying? Because there was a hair in his burrito

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I was once a hamster.

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Why can't Jimmy drive the tractor? Because Jimmy has no legs. Why doesn't he have any legs? Because he's a potato.

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saw a free cat yesterday...it was dead on the side of the road

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Two Naked men jump off a cliff. Three months later, an entire pack of Cub Scouts were enrolled in group therapy. It's ongoing.

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why does chuck norris not have a middle name? because his parents didn't want him to have one.

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What did the muffin say to the other muffin? "Hello, nice to meet you."

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what do you do when you see a black man limping across your frontyard? you stop laughing an reload.

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What do you do if you have a worm in your apple you throw it away

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Why did the man fall off the cliff? I don't know, I have mental AIDS.

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What is black and white and red all over? A road killed zebra.

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whats sad about 4 black guy drivein off a cliff in a cadalic a wast of good cadalic

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Roses are red Violets are fine I'll be the 6 You be the 9

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Why was the boy scared? Well, his mother had recently taken up Satanical ideals and in an attempt to sacrifice themselves to the Dark Lord, she drove her car off a cliff and into a lake. Now, with his dead mother in the drivers seat, no way to call emergency services, and 300 feet of water between him and the surface, you can see why he'd be scared.

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What's wrong with your hand!!!!!???? nothing.

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Why was the white man's girlfriend a whore? Because she engaged in sexual relations with a multitude of other men.

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What did the ketchup say to the mustard? Nothing they're just condiments.

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what do a snake and a bird have in common? they can both fly! except for the snake.

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Why did the man cry when he received his meal at McDonalds? They didn't give him a happy meal.

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Q: What's worse than a pile of dead babies? A: The live one at the bottom trying to eat his way out. Q: What's worse than that? A: When he comes back for more.

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Why did the cockroach cross the road? Why do you ask?

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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