Knock Knock. What's up? Oh, nothing much, you? Yeah, you know, same old, same old. Cool.

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What's brown and green, has six legs and if it fell out of a tree it would kill you? A pool table.

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whats in a red suit with a white beard and jolly......st.nick jerking of and blowwing a load in your stocking while taking a shit on you coffee table before theen hanging it back up over the fire place

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Why was the little African child sad? He had recently been denied an education only 4 days after witnessing his mother being raped and cut in half by a machete. ....he also had aids. ......and was in Africa.

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nothing drews nose is f**ing hilarious

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Congratulations, sir. The judge has determined that the charges of traffic violation against you were indeed incorrect, and you will be given a large sum of cash for your wasted time.

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Wish me luck these are the ten numbers on my keno 19 65 80 2 34 72 68 22 12 8

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Whats horny and big A dick minus the big part!

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You know what's funnier than 24? 25.

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whats worse than forgetting to buy cinnamon toast crunch at the grocery store? Getting beat to death with a gallon of rotten milk...

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Whats luckier than finding a lucky penny? winning the lottery.

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Your Mother

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"Have you heard the one about the trannie?" "No, what is it?" "Wow, that's offensive." -Juanita

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A woman comes to the doctor with a dog and the doctor says: -What are you doing here, dog? Get the hell out of here, you're an animal.

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What happens when a scientist tells you a lie? It's not true.

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What is worse then having no dad? Russian dad that hates you a lot and wishes you drawn in vodka.

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wanna hear a joke? no

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The dog, Marley from Marley and Me. It died.

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If Hitler, Osama Bin Laden, and Charlie Sheen were in a room together and you had a gun with two bullets, who would you shoot? Well Hitler and Bin Laden are already dead, and Charlie probably wouldn't die. Plus, I honestly don't think I could bring myself to shoot someone.

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Roses are Red, Violets are Blue.... I hate your guts.

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What's the difference between a pile of dead babies and a Corvette? What? I don't have a Corvette in my garage Wanna hear something gross? Sure. 1 at the bottom is still alive. Wanna hear something grosser? Yea. It's eating its way out

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What does a gay horse eat? Low-energy foods should only be fed to horses who are not regularly being worked and participating in high performance. According to the University of Kentucky's College of Agriculture, energy is vital to horses who need to perform their best as it aids many of the body's functions including muscle contraction, respiration and circulation. Only feed a low-energy diet to an idle horse and feed a high-energy diet to an older or sickly horse and to a working horse.

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Why couldn't Helen Keller drive? At age two, she contracted an illness that left her blind, deaf, unable to speak, and was considered backwards of intelligence. She lived in a dark and hopeless world of her own, rendering her unable to do anything, let alone drive.

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KENYAN HEALTHCARE kenyan water kenyan aids-free kenyan we dont have flies around us

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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