Why did the chicken cross the road? His whole family killed themselves.

thumb_up thumb_down -18

When life gives you melons. You're not dyslexic because you can probably tell the difference between a lemon and melon because they look so different.

thumb_up thumb_down -18

How did the American man get the Mexican man to jump over the wall? He didn't, after several attempts he then got a ladder and climbed over.

thumb_up thumb_down -17

Why did the man say how was your day? because it was the end of the day

thumb_up thumb_down +10

My mom gave me a quarter. I tryed to spend it on bubblegum but 7-11 said no...

thumb_up thumb_down +8

Rebecca Black

thumb_up thumb_down +11

Why is 13 the most hated number? 13 is Jewish.

thumb_up thumb_down +6

penisface

thumb_up thumb_down

Roses are red Violets are blue What about green? That seems mean...

thumb_up thumb_down -10

How many Polacks does it take to screw in a light-bulb? One. A person's ethnicity or country of origin, or religion for that matter, would have no bearing on one's ability to perform the relatively simple task of installing a light-bulb. Furthermore, there is no reason to use the negative slur 'polack' when referring to a person of Polish descent.

thumb_up thumb_down -14

What do you eat for breakfast and is sometimes blue? Pancakes.

thumb_up thumb_down

Tip for Employers: Avoid hiring unlucky people by immediately tossing half the resumes into the bin.

thumb_up thumb_down -18

"Bitches are fake, talk shit get hit!". False, female dogs cannot speak in the tongues of humans, and if they could I am sure excrement would not come from their mouths.

thumb_up thumb_down -22

whats the difference between virgin and a porn star?? A virgin hasn't got aids.

thumb_up thumb_down -20

Knock knock. Who's there? Hatch. Hatch who? God bless you.

thumb_up thumb_down -20

How many light bulbs does it take to screw a blonde? She said she can do 3

thumb_up thumb_down -18

Wanna hear a great joke? (any answer) Your dad's choice of condom.

thumb_up thumb_down +14

A black man walks into a bar. The bartender says, "I wont serve you." The black man says, "Why? Is it because of the color of my skin?" The bartender says, "No, didn't you read the sign on the front door? It says, "People with suits on will not be served." So the black man took off his suit and was kindly served.

thumb_up thumb_down -15

Why the hell does my sister shower in a swimsuit every time? Its not as if anyone is looking! ALRIGHT! ONCE ALRIGHT? ONLY ONCE! But then she hears the sound of my zipper ONCE and the shit hits the fan! Which is weird, yeah suuure she hears it when I pull it up, but when I pull it down and stroke it and moan? Nada!

thumb_up thumb_down -22

So a priest, a rabbi, a blonde and a black person walk into a bar. The Bar Tender says, "Is this some kind of joke"

thumb_up thumb_down -19

A worm slowly crawled through the ground, only to be eaten by an incoming bird.

thumb_up thumb_down -38

What do you call a dog with no legs? Disabled.

thumb_up thumb_down -18

i tried logging into my ipad. turns out, it was an etch a sketch, and i dont own an ipad. also, im out of vodka.

thumb_up thumb_down -22

Roses are Red Violets are Blue I have a gun Get in the van

thumb_up thumb_down -15

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops