Why did the straight man turn gay? He didn't. He was always gay but had to hide this from his family and friends because of an overwhelming sense of homophobia in his community.

How do you catch a unique animal? You get professional hunters to catch the animal.

Whats worse than finding a worm in your apple? Getting raped by a giant scorpian. Whats worse than getting raped by a giant scorpian? Getting tortured to death. Whats worse than being tortured to death? Getting raped by a giant scorpian, and getting tortured to death. Whats worse than that? Getting raped by a giant scorpian, getting tortured to death, and finding a worm in your apple.

The President, The Pope, and a small child are all in an airplane when the pilot announces that the plane is going to crash. They crash into the ocean and quickly remember that there is a life vest under their seats, which they promptly put on and safely inflate after exiting the cabin of the aircraft by pulling down on one or both of the red tabs.

Roses are brown, violets are brown, who keeps shitting in my garden?

"I had angry birds before it was cool." -Alfred Hitchcock

What do you call a horny blond on the corner? A prostitute

What did the jew say to the black man? I'm jewish

when life randomly gives u lemons, u should probably have a stand cuz people are gonna expect u to make lemonade

q. a whale walks into a bar. The bartender asks"why are you wailling?" A. I my 3 year-old son died.

Your moms so dumb that she has cancer..... wait thats racist

What do you call a fat ethiopian. Impossible

Q: How do you get a jewish girls number? A: You roll up her sleeve

Why did the chicken cross the road? Because i was keeping his family at gun-point on the other side.

Q: how do you make a clean naz dance? A: put a lil boogy in it? NOOO SUCK IT!!!

How many guys does it take to change a light bulb? Probably just one.

what did the boy with no arms or legs get for christmas? cancer

when life gives you skittles you take a handful and throw it at someone face and yell taste the rainbow

Why don`t women need watches? Because in our modern society, there are many clocks in most locations.

What did the man say to the young, blond athletic girl walking by? "Hi."

What begins with "F" and ends in "uck"? There are multiple words or words that begin with "F" and end in "uck." So you dont need me to tell you, be creative.

A baby seal walks into a club. He immediately escorted out because babies are not allowed in clubs.

Why did the koala fall out of the tree? Because it was dead.

Why did the girl fall off the swingset? Because she got hit by a refridgerator.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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