Roses are blue Violets are red Sugar are you And so is sweet

What did the dubstep say? Wub.

How many people does it take to change a light bulb? Just one, more people would just make it harder.

Why did the chicken cross the road? Because he was stapeled on to the elephant.

Man 1: Ask me if im a flower Man 2: "are you a flower?" Man 1: if i was a flower do you think i could talk? man 1 was wondering why man 2 was so uneducated

Funeral... You can't spell it without FUN

What do you call a panda without a head? Dead.

What's worse than five babies in one trash can? One baby in five trash cans.

What's the difference between a black man and a park bench? A park bench can support a family of four.

On a scale of 1 to Lord Voldemort, how awkward would you say your hugs are?

How do you know if a black man was in your house while you weren't home? When you let them enter to babysit your children.

Whats the difference between football and basketball? Absolutely everything By darragh Hamilton

What rhymes with bigger and can jump really high? Tigger

Knock knock. The door was not answered because, rather than rapping upon the door with his knuckles twice consecutively, Joseph simply said the onomatopoeia verbs vocally. He intended to wish his neighbor and dear friend of twenty years the best of luck with his current situation, as his neighbor had been recently divorced from a marriage of forty-eight years. Joseph then walked home, because intruding upon his friend's privacy would have befuddled him even further.

Whats worse then a hundred dead babies? One trying to eat its way out.

Why did the girl fall out of the swing? Because she didn't have any arms.

Why did the chicken cross the road? Because he thought he saw a dangerous predator in the area and crossed the road in an attempt to flee the dangerous situation.

No, its just his eye, its infected, he gets fever and well, that is all I should say. Nero is my friend and I do not like it when people lie to him, he is outside having a cigarette, I do not think he wants to speak with you anymore. Bye.

Roses are red, Violets are blue, My van is coming, I'm gonna get you!

what is a bike without wheels? not a bike.

Why did the Jew hate bananas? He was deathly allergic to them.

What happens when a Republican accidentally walks into a Gay/Straight Alliance meeting? The man asks if he is in the right place. He apologizes and then leaves.

A priest a rapist and a child molester walk into a bar. He orders a drink

What do a gas and a liquid have in common? Nothing

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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