What do Bruce Lee and Michael Jackson have in common? They are both dead

A horse walks into a bar and the bartender asks, "Why the Long face" The horse then storms out of the bar, wondering why every bartender must ask him that.

You know what is not cool? Fire.

A horse walks into a bar. The bartender asks, "Why the long face?" The horse does not respond because it is a horse, thus lacking cognitive capacity to speak nor understand English. It is confused by its surroundings and promptly defecates on the floor then gallops out of the bar, knocking over a few chairs and tables.

How does a black man spell Jack J-A-C-K

God made rivers God made lakes God made you We all make misstakes

When you wish upon a star... ... you're actually a few million years late, according to astronomy. The star is dead. Just like your dreams.

How many ADD kids does it take to screw in a lightbulb? Let's ride bikes!!

What's invisible? A lot of stuff.

To the 'am i pregnant now?'-section: Yesterday I spilled mustard on my brand new pants. That was just before I went out to some clubs. That night, after I had enjoyed myself with friends and alcohol, while I was walking home I was raped several times by big, black and hung men. It hurt a lot and my anus is still bleeding. My question is: What is the best way to get rid of the mustard stain?

Q:Ask me if I'm a tree Are you a tree A: No

want to hear a dirty joke tommy fell in the mud a clean joke he took a bath with bubbles bubbles was his neighbor

Knock Knock!! Who's there? Dyphis, say goodbye to your kids.

A man walked into a bar. He got a concussion and couldn't see strait for days.

What did the fish say when he ran into a wall? Dam.

How did the chef bake 20 muffins for the king? My name is Bob.

What's the easiest way to become President? Have a background in politics and a catchy campaign slogan that voting Americans can relate to.

Knock Knock Who's there? Me!! .... me who? Just open the motherf***ing door!! MOM!?! Theres a rapist at the door. MOM: No Jimmy, thats your father

Knock knock. Who's there? Your doorbell is broken.

What's the difference between Neil Armstrong and Michael Jackson? Neil Armstrong was the first man to walk on the moon, whereas Michael Jackson was a singer.

A lady walks into her bedroom and sees her boy friend having sex with another girl. She hears the phone ring and a voice says "your grandma died".

This is an anti joke with a difference. It's funny.

Whats worse than the holocaust? Finding a worm in your apple.

Why did the cookie shader Because someone dropped it

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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