A man brings his entire family in to meet a show producer. The producer says, "Okay, let's see what you got." The man then proceeds to lead his family through a variety of acts, including showcasing the proper way to drink English tea and how to dress for a polo match. When they finish, the producer asks, "And just what do you call your act?" To which the man replies, "The Aristocrats!"

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What did the Jew say to the German? He said hello.

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What's the deal with airline food? Food tastes different on an airplane. The atmosphere dries out your nose, the air pressure numbs 1/3 of your taste buds, and low humidity levels give you cotton mouth. These factors cause the food to taste worse than it normally would.

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Knock Knock Whose there? Its John

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What's purple and has four legs? I don't know. What? I DONT KNOW EITHER THAT'S WHY I'M ASKING YOU IN THE FIRST PLACE!

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What did the little boy do when he got his test grade? Cried, it was 0

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Why was the boy considered a bitch? His name was Jason Jubin

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What's the difference between Jews and pizza? God likes pizza

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Why is Stevie Wonder always smiling? Because he's usually in a good mood.

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It's all fun and games until you stop having fun

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Once upon a time, there was a gorilla who found Suzie. Suzie was mauled because she had no arms

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Why is it that all cats dislike flying saucers? The strange noises and lights probably frighten them, as they don't understand the concepts of extra-terrestrial intelligence and space travel.

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Once upon a time, there was a pair of headphones. It loved the sound of music.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? I don't know why, but I was standing on the other side of the road and I took it home and mamed the chicken with a powerdrill.

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Rabid squirrels attacked Blake's face as winged pickles perched on Phoebe's hair.

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Two people are sitting on a 10th story window sill. They both fall off and die.

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watch me nae nae

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Hey guys I'm more of a Nets fan.

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Man 1: Is your refrigerator running? Man 2: Nope, broke last week.

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What is purple after you stroke it a lot? An eggplant

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What happened when the blind man reached for his soda? He picked it up, took a sip, and placed it back down where it was and continued with what he was doing.

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Why Do Black People Love Watermelon? Because Its A Delicious Fruit.

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How do Mexicans have sex? They get in bed, and the man puts his dick in his partner's vagina.

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why did jenny fall off the swing? because she had no arms Knock Knock Whos there? not jenny

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops