Q. Why did my ass feel so sweaty? A. Because i was exercising and suckn on some nips.

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Knock Knock. Please stop peddling your religion on my doorstep. .

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Yo mama's so fat, that when she jumped, gravity pushed her back to the floor!

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What's 6 inches long, 2 inches wide, and drives women crazy. A 6 inch long 2 inch diameter syringe filled with heroin being injected into a woman.

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Whats worse than a pile of dead babies? A live one at the bottom.

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An old man walks across the street. Several cars start to honk in irritation, for they are in a hurry and the man is walking quite sluggishly.

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Q: What the difference between a Porsche and a pile of dead babies A: I don't have a Porsche in my garage

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If Jimmy in New York has 2 apples, and Tommy in Denver has 4 apples, what is the mass of the sun? 1.989E30 kg.

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Why did the boy punch a little kid in the face? Because he was a bully and liked to feel superior.

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Q: How do you call a group of animals? A: Llama.

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Is this the Krusty Krab? No, the Krusty Krab is a fictional place, and therefore does not exist.

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What did the shark say to the boat captain? So do you prefer cards or pool?

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Three head lice are drinking beer on a scalp, then they are killed by a high strength medical shampoo.

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Why did Poppy lose at sports day? Because she had a heart attack and died.

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Two atoms are walking down the street one day, and one of them says to the other: "Hey, wait up a second. I think I lost an electron" The first atom replied, "Are you sure?" The second atom said, "Oh, wait. Never mind. I found it."

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why did the chicken cross the road? because colonel sanders was chasing it with an axe

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Q. have you seen stevie wonders last album? A. neither has he.

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Beans, beans, the magical fruit. The more you eat, the more you have consumed.

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knock knock who's there Romney Romney Who? RON PAUL 2012

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(insert command here) Oh yeah, well I want world peace.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? So he could get back before curfew.

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whats white and sticking?... glue, you dirty bastard

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What did the church say to the house? You need jesus

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What do you call a fat guy running on the street? Nothing because you should respect his effort trying to improve his health.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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