Roses Are Red Violets Are Blue U suck Dick Just Like Ur Dad did to u

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so your skydiving in the ocean and one of you bedroom windows break. how many bloodstains does it take to paint a peice of bread covered in goat milk? the answer is D. 2731 books on cannabalism

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Your face is hilarious.

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Why was Hellen Keller afraid to answer the phone? This situation is impossible because Hellen suffered from scarlet fever, therefore she could not see or hear the phone.

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How do you fit an elephant inside your car? Starve it to death then chop it in pieces.

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whats softer than a furry blanket an indian

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d

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what do you get when you stick a pair of scissors in a four year old? an erection.

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How many Weasleys does it take to screw in a lightbulb? 2

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What do you do when life gives you lemons? Make some fucking lemonade.

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Leave. Now.

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Knock, knock Who's there? The police. Your under arrest!

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Why did the gir fall off of the swing? She had no arms.

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How did the polack burn his hands on the stove? He placed his hands on the hot stove top burners not realizing they were hot.

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why did the mokey fall out of the tree because it was dead.

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? Because it was dead! Why did the bird fall out of the tree? It was attatched to the monkey! Why did the squirrel fall out of the tree? .....................peer pressure

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Confucius says... The superior man, when resting in safety, does not forget that danger may come. When in a state of security he does not forget the possibility of ruin. When all is orderly, he does not forget that disorder may come. Thus his person is not endangered, and his States and all their clans are preserved.

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Roses are red, violets are blue, so is my face, I'm constipated

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Why did Jake not get on the bus? Answer: Because Jake is a dog. Dogs are not allowed on the bus.

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Why did my car stop suddenly? I had arrived at my appropriate destination.

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what did one toilet say to the other toilet? i would love to flush u

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I met a hot girl in the Tampon aisle and i asked if she wanted to hang out in 5-7 days

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What sits in the corner of room and gets smaller and smaller? A baby combing it's hair with a potato peeler

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How do you greet a small mexican man at Chuck E. Cheese? Whatsup Jose

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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