How do you protect yourself from fire? Kill an orphan and nail its bones to your skin.

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roses are red violets are blue i done you mom a favor by making you...banana and rice don't worry it'll taste just nice

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what do you get when you cross a baby and a car a baby shaped dent, and a dead baby

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Why did Helen Keller's dog run away? You would run away too if your name was urdaagaa.

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ow

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Why did the cook put rubber bands in the spaghetti Because he was an asshole

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You know whats annoying? Steve

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A black man goes down to Alabama in the 1960s; He gets lynched.

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Why did the black guy enjoy anal sex? Because he has a phobia of vaginas and only likes to have anal

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"I love you terribly!" said the girl to her new boyfriend. "You're not that bad...you're still better at giving hand jobs than your dad is."

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Why did Billy fall off the swings? Because he had no arms. Knock knock! Who's there? Not Billy.

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whats worse than being ugly? being aivy.

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Why was the white guy eating himself? He was a autocannibal.

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Four turtles once fell into nuclear waste. They remained unnoticed and later died from exposure to radiation.

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a man dropped a bar of soap in the shower. He immediately picked it up and finished washing himself. He then got dressed and left the gym.

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Man: What is the meaning of life? God: Buffalo wings. Lots and lots of buffalo wings.

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Knock, knock. Who's there? Not the World Trade Center.

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Why did Rudolph poop while flying over Chicago? Actually, he had to go since trip started, and that's just where it happened to land.

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Why did the person write an antijoke? To get to the other side

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Why do people insist on drinking diet soda meanwhile eating extremely unhealthy food? Because some people like the taste of diet soda over regular soda.

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A white guy, a black guy, and an asian guy jump off a bridge. Who hits the ground first? It doesn't matter. They are all going to die.

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Why was Johnny so sad His father beat his mother

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What do you call a black guy that flies a plane? a pilot.

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whats up fuch you bitch

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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