What do you call a cat with a pop tart for a body and rainbows flying out of its butt? Nyan Cat

Knock knock Who's there? A very long space I see what you did there

what did God say on the 7th day? -zzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzz

What's the best part of twenty one year old's? Their bodies have matured enough that the U.S. government deems it safe for them to consume alcoholic beverages with proper I.D.

Bob Saget

What's worse than having amnesia? I don't remember.

Knock Knock Who's there? The visitor is deaf and therefore does not have the ability to respond.

What do you call a blonde driving the wrong way down the freeway? Well that depends on what her parents named her, or whether she happens to have a nickname of sorts.

What do you call a black midget with no legs and has 11 fingers? A human being

How do you kill a blonde? The blonde you were planning on killing, Sarah, arrives home from a rather tiring run. She lets her hair down from her ponytail, and even though she is a little sweaty At the moment, you realize what a beautiful woman she really is. You decide to ask her to marry You, and after she says yes, you two make passionate love in the front seat Of your 2011 Cadillac Escalade.

Ass ass ass ass ass ass ass ass ass ass...! I said "ass" a lot, sorry for the language

How do you make a baby cry? You throw a brick at its face.

Why did the chicken cross the road? To get to my house. Knock knock. Who's there? The chicken.

whats fat and sits on a toilet? a fat guy sitting on the toilet

Roses are red violets are blue whats the opposite of skiny again cause i think that's you

Im 8 years old, sometimes I get sick, and I take medicine and it makes me feel better. My daughter has cancer.

What did the boy with no arms and no legs get for his birthday? Twister

Roses are red, violets are blue, pee pee is yellow, poo poo is brown. if not you have a serious disease...

antonis sister is mighty fine

Know what im sayin'? No but im wearing pants

Stop driving smart cars you fags

What's 9+10? 19

Those that want what is best for me, shall listen to me and do only whatever I want. Those that want ONLY what is best for me, underestimate me greatly. You who stand in the way if my will, claiming you want what is best for me, better move aside.

Your future.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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