Why did little Susie fall off the cliff? I pushed her.

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A man was standing out in the rain and calls out to god saying "smite me god, SMITE ME NOW" and the man was arrested and booked cause a near by neighbor reported on the disturbance. he is now facing charges of disturbing the peace.

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a man walked into a bar.the bar was metal and he cracked his skull

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minorities

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Whats the difference between a dead baby and a lamborghini? Dead babies are not sports cars

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Once upon a time, a duck named Jim went to work, he went up to the steps to his new job and and he was paid all day to sit in a hot tub. Little did he know it was a boiling pot and he was served at Christmas dinner

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What do you call a big group of Chinese people on Mars? An extraordinary feat for the Chinese space program and a historic day in human history, where a particular country has set up the first human colony on another planet and we have proven to ourselves that our race is capable of interplanetary travel and can accomplish anything if we set our minds to it.

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A man walked into a bar and asked if he could use the toilet The bartender told him that it was for paying customers only The man walked up to the bartender, ordered a drink and then proceeded to go to the toilet He came back feeling refreshed, finished his drink and said his goodbyes

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Why do black people eat fried chicken? Because black people are usually stronger than chicken. If they weren't, chickens would probably eat fried black people.

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A dyslexic man walks into a bra. He removes the piece of lingerie from his face and continues shopping for clothes.

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womens rights

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How do you make a 5 year old cry? Kill their parents.

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Guess where my mom lives? Utah? Correct Guess where my dad lives? Utah? Correct Guess where my aunt lives Utah!?!?!? NO!!!! Trick Question b... she's dead

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Whats worse than bitting into a apple and finding a worm? Being the worm who just lost nearly half his whole house because some jerk decided to eat an apple on the ground, whom after eating the apple destroyed the worms self-esteem by making the comparison to the worse thing possible. Or being raped by Zeus in the form of a worm.

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A: Ask me if I'm a tree. B: Are you a tree? A: psh, no! *gives offended look and walks away*

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Doctor: Why the long face? Elephant Man: That's not my face that's a tumor.

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Why couldn't the convicted felonist get back to America? He was in Antarctica and accidentally licked a flagpole.

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A dyslexic man hears a joke, and laffs.

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What happened when Suzy fell off the swing? She hurt herself.

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What would Chuck Norris do if you insulted him? Nothing. He probably doesn't have time for such foolishness.

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How did Hellen Keller eat her meals? With a fork.

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Whats the difference between a dead baby and a chevrolet? I've never been inside a chevrolet before...

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How do you keep someone in suspense? Refuse to let them view the resolultion of a gripping film.

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Whats green? The color green.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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