Why did the girl fall off the swing Because she had no arms Why did the boy drop his ice cream Because he was hit by a truck. and geuss who was driving the truck? The girl with no arms

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what cuts the grass on christmas eve and lives in mexico? JP I lied about Mexico jackin it in san diego

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You might be a redneck if you are a an uneducated white farm laborer from the south.

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what do you call a black man named mike

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What's the difference between a Jew and a piece of coal? The coal doesn't scream when you burn it.

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A man waltzes into a bar, waving a carrot in the air. With an arrogant air of self-importance he flops onto a highchair at the bar. Looka here, looka here, he says to the bartender, waiving the carrot at the man. Will you buy me drinks all night, if I can make this carrot... Never mind, and please leave my bar, the bartender says, pulling out a carrot from under the counter. I've got one myself.

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What did the three sixteen year old boys do to the homeless man late at night? Wished him a happy birthday and gave him a meal

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Q: Why does Bill Gates give so much money to charity? A: Because he wants to improve the lives of his fellow human beings, and also excessive wealth would be detrimental to his children.

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What did the snake say to the mouse? Nothing. The snake ate the mouse.

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Sometimes, people ask me, "Do you always have to be so obnoxious?" And to that I reply, "I don't always, but when I do, I prefer Dos Equis." Stay thirsty, my friends.

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Have you seen Stevie Wonders new house? No. Neither has he.

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How many cops does it take to change a lightbulb? 1

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rocky is staring at us from outside...

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Roses are red Violets are blue Some poems rhyme But this one doesn't

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What's the difference between a black guy and a Cadillac? One is a car and the other is a man. And it is insensitive to speak about race so blatantly, sir.

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WWII veteran screamed! "You damn yellow monkey" "But sir... ...my fur is brown!" Replied the monkey.

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What did the man say to his wife right before they got married? "I do."

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Why was the lady fat. She ate a lot of food.

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What does a shortstop do when the ball is by third base? He leaves the field to go to the hospital, his little sister just had a heart attack.

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Why was the chair sad? It wasn't, for chairs do not posses the proper attributes to feel emotions such as depression.

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what do you call afish and a cat? a catfish

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Why did the black guy go to jail? Because he committed an illegal crime.

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What's the difference between a bag of dead babies and a Ferrari? I have a bag of dead babies in my garage.

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Two muffins are in an oven. One muffin says its getting hot in here the other muffin say holy shit a talking muffin.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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