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What does Helen Keller's parents do when she gets in trouble? They leave the plunger in the toilet!!!

What do you call two spaniards talking in French. Bilingual.

what happened when spongebob and Patrick were mean to sandy? she made a hurricane

Why did the chicken cross the road? Because he was a depressed alcoholic drug addict whose children had all been diagnosed with a rare form of terminal brain cancer, and he decided to end it then and there by jumping in front of an approaching bus.

LA Police, Christine Collins called. She wants her son back.

I like my women how I like my coffee; without a penis.

A man walks into a bar. The bartender asks what he'd like to drink. The man pulls out his gun, shoots the surprised bartender, and proceeds to execute all the patrons of the bar and finally commit suicide. A post-mortem identification of the man identifies him as a victim of childhood sexual abuse and a diagnosed schizophrenic. There is a nice funeral for all the victims and the media respectfully minimizes exposure of the event.

Dyslexic devil worshippers sell their souls to Santa

I'm getting sick of holocaust jokes can't you Nazi Anne Frankly I'm sick of it

What do you call a fat black guy in KFC? A guy who likes KFC.

Why didn't Helen Keller learn to drive as a teenager? They didn't have cars back then.

What does the man do to his meat? He beats it.

Q. If you have $5, and a friend has $5, then how much money do you both have? A. You both have $5.

yo mama so dumb she got hit by a parked car. ~YN~

A wanted man walks into a bar. The police come and take him to jail.

Roses are red, Violets are blue. Most poems rhyme, But his one doesn't.

Which came first, The chicken or the egg? Well, Firstly, I suppose that depends on if we are discussing Creation or Evolution. If we are talking about Evolution, The Chicken must Logically have evolved from an egg laying creature, one which was similar to, but not quite a chicken, so, the first chicken hatched from the egg of said creature. However, if we are discussing Creation, there is no way to discern which the deity in question decided to create first, so, even odds. Therefore, Logically, there is a 75% chance the Egg came first. However, if we are discussing Chicken Eggs Specifically, the reverse is true, because the egg the first Chicken hatched from would not have been a chicken egg, it would have been the egg of another creature, a "proto-chicken" if you will. and so, in the evolution scenario, the Chicken came first. Still, in this situation, there are even odds as to which a creator may or may not have created first. Therefore, Logically, in this Scenario, there is a 75% chance that the Chicken came first

What what In the butt

-What do you call the brown spots in your yard? -Dog shit.

A cup of ranch walks into a lemon

What did the cow say to the Businessman? Nothing. Cows cant talk.

What did the black man say to the man from Kyrgyzstan? I've never heard of your country before.

What is the difference between a horse? All the legs are of same length, especially the back ones.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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