How do you call blond girl with no arms and no legs ? A victim of a tragic car accident.

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Why do undertakers wear ties? Because their profession is very serious, and it is important that their appearance has a degree of gravitas

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What would a prostitute do if she was given a million dollars? She would probably diversify her portfolio. First, she would pay her rent. She would buy some groceries and a present for her mother. She would then invest it in stocks and low-yield bonds. She would they buy a vehicle. This win might not affect her continuance in her job.

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Why was the Indian at the casino? He had a gambling addiction.

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How does a bird grow gills if you're riding a peanut. A fridge.

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What did the black man say to the asian? Hey.

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If Bob has 65 sweets and he eats 57 how many does he have? Bob has diabetes. He has high blood sugar, either because the body does not produce enough insulin, or because cells do not respond to the insulin that is produced.

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Mullets

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Roses are #FF0000 Violets are #0000FF

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CAUSE IT'S ONE, TWO, THREE STRIKES YOU'RE OUT

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*Phone rings* Hello? Hi, is your refrigerator running? No, it actually broke down yesterday. Are you the repair man? Yes, the repairs will cost $400

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whats round red and taste like candy? such a thing doesn't exist

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Roses are red Violets are blue I am a cow moo

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Why did the girl get run over by a bus? The bus driver was blind.

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Why did the Black guy work at KFC? To provide money for his struggling family.

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Knock knock Who's there? Jehovah's Witness ... Hello?

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Yo mama is so stupid... She didn't graduate high school.

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A guy walks into a bar and says 'Ow!'

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What is red? A rock painted red

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ur an fagit

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Fenestrade De Riguerto sat aloft his might horse Bentereuse and called for his brigadiers. At home his wife was opening a package. 2 minutes later a sound could be heard reverberating across the countryside. It was the invasion fleet from Denarus V wiping out humanity

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Why was Timmy sad? He had a frog stapled to his face

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Q1:Why was the homeless man homeless? A1:He suffered from a series of mentally disabilitating diseases. From a young age these disabilities went unnoticed and untreated. They evolved to a level in which he believes he is god, therefore he throws fescues at passing automobiles. Q2:Why does the homeless man throw poo at cars? A2:See answer 1

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What do you call a black man on the moon? An astronaut.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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