What's the hardest part of walking through a pile of dead babies? My penis.

thumb_up thumb_down +1

Yo mamma is so fat she needs a highly dangerous gastrointestinal bypass and if she dies you will wish she had made more of an effort to diet.

thumb_up thumb_down +32

Your mother's so fat that when she goes through rotating doors, the doors rotate around her.

thumb_up thumb_down -17

My mom told me and my brother to clean up o te commercial...but we were watching Netflix

thumb_up thumb_down -17

I went to the opticians to get my eyes checked. The optician said "you need glasses".

thumb_up thumb_down -3

Why did the homosexual man buy the antijoke book he enjoys reading

thumb_up thumb_down -8

What happens when a black guy jumps you? Well its no diffrent to when anyone else jumps you!

thumb_up thumb_down -3

What did the farmer say when he lost his tractor? Wheres my tractor?

thumb_up thumb_down -25

Did you hear about the man who discovered the secret to making women happy? Neither have I.

thumb_up thumb_down +43

Why did the girl cry when her boyfriend brought up the topic about rape? Because she was raped by her father as a child and it was a suppressed memory.

thumb_up thumb_down -7

Why was the crocodile depressed? It wasn't; given the primitive anatomy of the reptilian brain, modern biopsychoneurological evidence suggests that reptiles feel only basic emotions such as fear or anger.

thumb_up thumb_down +12

What's worse than a truck full of dead babies? Trying to sell a used truck with dead baby stains all over it.

thumb_up thumb_down -7

"Knock knock" "Who's there?!, who's there?!!!, ya fucking asshole!!!, and quit knockin on my door!, my windows are fine!"

thumb_up thumb_down -23

A Jewish man overhears another man making a joke about the Holocaust. The Jew says, "Hey! You! My father died in the Holocaust!" The other man says, "Oh, I'm sorry. What camp was he in?" The Jew says, "Camp? No, my father had a heart attack."

thumb_up thumb_down +8

Why did the man reach for his gun? Because he wanted to kill someone.

thumb_up thumb_down +27

I fantasize about having sex with a moose

thumb_up thumb_down +10

i was scrolling through the anti-jokes and saw one that just said refridgerator. i laughed. penis.

thumb_up thumb_down -14

A bear wakes up from hibernation and is hungry. He sees a nearby forest cabin and decides to see if he can find food inside. The bear breaks into the cabin and thus the people staying there frantically run away to call animal control.

thumb_up thumb_down -10

Hmmm, how would Sherlock Holmes solve a crime?... Oh wait. He doesn't exist.

thumb_up thumb_down -2

Q)whats pink and fluffy A)pink fluff

thumb_up thumb_down +12

Why did the baby cross the road? Because it was stapled to the chicken.

thumb_up thumb_down +8

How many Jews foes it take to screw in a lightbulb? 1...like... I'm confused that you... I mean screwing in a lightbulb isn't that hard.

thumb_up thumb_down +13

It's valentines today! My girlfriend died.

thumb_up thumb_down -28

What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? The Holocaust.

thumb_up thumb_down +40,601

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops