What starts with F and ends with UCK? Firetruck

thumb_up thumb_down +13

Why couldn't the old man see? Because he was stabbed in the eye.

thumb_up thumb_down -3

One man calls emergency: - Come immediately, my little son has swallowed a condom! After five minutes, the same man calls back: - It is OK, I found another one.

thumb_up thumb_down +5

Q: What do is it called when Justin Bieber has sex with a woman? A: Why give it a name when it is never goin to happen!

thumb_up thumb_down +3

What is worse than getting a bad grade on a test. Having your family dog bled out in front of you, bitch.

thumb_up thumb_down -3

Why doesn't Jonathan Walk across the road? Because he is in a wheelchair...

thumb_up thumb_down +5

How did you know it was bedtime at Michael Jackson's house? When his clock's big hand met the little hand, usually at 10 or 11, though sometimes later if he had a concert that night.

thumb_up thumb_down +15

Black Friday

thumb_up thumb_down -1

My mom gave me a quarter. I tryed to spend it on bubblegum but 7-11 said no...

thumb_up thumb_down +6

What did the mentally disabled child say to the snowman? Mnnghhhmuhmuhhu ooh ooh ooh!

thumb_up thumb_down -16

Jacob went onto anti-jokes cause Brock told him to and Jacobs his bitch.

thumb_up thumb_down +22

What's black and white and red all over? The newspaper classified section after a man has abandoned long, futile job hunt. He has crossed out all the potential jobs with red ink. He was laid off due to the downturn in the economy and will now have to get food stamps, which is very embarrassing for a man who has worked to support his family his entire life.

thumb_up thumb_down -28

Q: What did the pope say to the prostitute he passed in the street? A: Bath & Bodyworks are having a sale

thumb_up thumb_down +12

A blonde goes to school, and completes a difficult math problem.

thumb_up thumb_down -12

clown penis dot fart? dangle pussy

thumb_up thumb_down -17

What did the boy with no arms and legs get for Christmas? Cancer.

thumb_up thumb_down +7

What did the boy find I'n his water? Ice

thumb_up thumb_down +11

How do you see a black man in the dark? You dont

thumb_up thumb_down +31

How many Alzheimer's patients does it take to change a light-bulb? I'm melting!

thumb_up thumb_down +9

Some dude and his son are driving to school. They get into a car accident so the have to go the the hospital. But when the doctor comes in, the doctor says "I can't oporate on this boy! He's my son!" Who's the doctor? His Mom.

thumb_up thumb_down +41

2 muffins are in a oven for 30 minutes, the baker then questions why he only baked 2 muffins.

thumb_up thumb_down -17

A: Knock Knock. B: ... A: Knock Knock. B: ... A: I guess nobody's home. (leaves.)

thumb_up thumb_down +6

Dude, that's not banana ice cream...

thumb_up thumb_down -25

what do you call the one eyed man in the land of the blind? You call him an outcast

thumb_up thumb_down +34

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops