I have Alzheimer's, but at least I don't have Alzheimer's.

What do humans and fish both have in common? They both live underwater, apart from humans.

No

i used to take arrows to the knee,til i took one to the balls.

Knock knock Who's there? Me Me who? Me me Oh

Stat1st1cs sh0w 0ne 1n f1ve pe0ple d0n't understand b1nary

Why did the baby die? It got shot.

Your dad is so fat, that eventually he got on Biggest Loser and ended living a very successful life.

Why did the black man go to the gym? Because he was severely fat and would live a short life if he didn't lose weight.

What did the Jew say the Black man after their meal? "Don't worry, I'll pay the bill."

How many teachers would it take to find their way out of a maze? Depends on their area of speciality. If the teacher(s) are mathematicians or logicians, probably one or two at most. If they are home economics teachers, possibly more.

Why can't black guys eat babby back ribs... Beacause They are black too

Run, Run, As fast as you can, You can't catch me, I'm in a car.

Why did the chicken cross the road? Because the chicken was trying to escape from the sad and depressing environment that surrounded him on the side he thus came from. Alas, he did not know that he would be soon hit by a drunk truck driver, who would also die, in a bright explosion of morbid flames and screams.

Why was the thirteen year old raped by an online predator? Because he made very poor choices on giving out his personal information.

Dear paranoid people who check behind their shower curtains for murderers, If you do find one, what`s your plan?

What does a dog in a microwave look like? You tell me, I normally close my eyes when I masturbate ?_?

Q: How did the dead baby get to the other side of the road? A: I threw it over there.

wat did the candle say to the lighter? nothing candles cant speak because they are inamimate objects, even so i think a candle would just scream anyway, would you buy a screaming candle?

What did the Man say to the elephant Nothing this man does not speak, the elephant does though

A.do i have alzheimer's? B.yes A.do i have alzheimer's?

Q: What do you call a black pilot. A: A pilot you racist.

Laughter and joy... You are really sweet you know.. Excuuuse me princess! But Like Mickey Mouse never changed... From a Potato peeler to some fuckup private detective in a trenchcoat. So tell me, what character did Walt Disney draw before Mickey Mouse?

What did the Jewish man get for Christmas? Nothing. He is Jewish, therefore he does not celebrate Christmas, he celebrates Hanukkah. So he won't get a present for Christmas, he will get eight presents for Hanukkah. (He'll like getting a good deal).

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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