Wanna hear a joke? My penis size.

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Why did the girl eat a sandwich? because she was thirsty

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A black guy and a white guy are sitting in the bar. Later they will probably return to their respectable homes.

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why did the pinapple walk the plank? to eat a cat because cheese say people!

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Knock Knock It's Open!

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Roses are red, But ravens are black, please go to China, and never come back!

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Q: How many Jews can you fit in a 4-seater car? A: 4

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Why was Helen Keller a bad driver? Because it is very difficult for someone with a vision impairment to operate a vehicle.

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;iub

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A man attempts to rob a bank. The police are called and the robber is arrested for attempted robbery.

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Whats the difference between a red cup and a blue cup. Ones red and the other is blue.

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Omg its that superman nope chuck testa

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what did the blind deaf orphan get for christmas? cancer

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Why did people have cold showers in the old days? Because there was no electricity back then, making it hard to heat water to a temperature that was classified as 'warm'.

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Tic tac toe Your mother and I are getting a divorce.

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What did the wizard say to the man? Wizards aren't real. Thus not able to speak.

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Q: Why did the chicken cross the road? A: He didn't, he died in the middle of this task.

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What do you call a Russian man who is on the moon? A cosmonaut

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Take one: "What kind of assho... Take two "What kind of awesome people with no dignit..." Take three: "What kind of awesome people with most dignified self image would use this piece of shit s... Final take What kind of awesome people with most dinified self image would use this RETARDED PIECE OF MOLTEN SHlT SITE FROM FUCKING HELL?" Moral: "Technically I do not use it, I abuse it just like I did your mom... Hey, I am your dad by the way, that gives me the right to rape you whenever I want" NeroMetal I once fisted a velociraptor to death (I do not mean punching it in the face here if you think thats something), but that's not metal... I cant for the fuck bother to find out how to spell the fucking dinosaurs name... Now that is metal...

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why did dinosaurs get extinct? i don't know i was not there to see it!!!!!!!!!

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I like my women like I like my coffee... 2 cream 1 sugar.

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A women gets on a bus, the bus driver says 'that is the ugliest baby i have ever seen!' the women pays for her ticket and sits on one of the seats while the bus pulls off.

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What do you call a big group of Chinese people on Mars? An extraordinary feat for the Chinese space program and a historic day in human history, where a particular country has set up the first human colony on another planet and we have proven to ourselves that our race is capable of interplanetary travel and can accomplish anything if we set our minds to it.

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Why did the Mexican cross the road? Because he was late for his uncle's funeral, which was taking place in the church across from his apartment.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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