A man walk into a bar he buys a few drinks. When he is done the bar tender gives him his check. Man told the bar tender he has no money to pay for it. Bartender says," ok how about this we have a horse in the back that hasn't laughed a day in his life if you can make him laugh you get the drinks for free." so man proceeds to do so. A few minutes later man comes out horse is dying. So the man gets his drink for free. A few days later man comes back with the same deal. So the bartender tells him" that horse hasn't stopped laughing since you went back there. If you can make him stop you get your drinks for free." Man goes in a few minutes later comes out horse is crying. Man man is remarked by how he did it but he doesn't question it. A few days past the man comes back an the horse is still crying...... So the bartender ask the man how he did..... Man says," first I told him I had a bigger dick then him....second time I proved it"

how do u get a clown to stop smiling? Hit it with an axe!

Can you say the word "toy boat" 10 times fast? No

What is big, red, and eats rocks? A big red rock-eater

what did the boy with no arms and no legs get for christmas? a nintendo wii.

Knock knock, Who's there? The constable. Your husband was killed in a car crash.

How many babies does it take to paint a wall red? Depends on how hard you throw them.

Your mama's so stupid, she gave birth to YOU.

-What's funnier than a dog with no legs? -The movie Dumb and Dumber, in my opinion.

whats sad about justin bieber getting hit by a car and dying ? I wasnt driving the car that hit him.

Ben Corbishley

Penis.

What characterizes a good joke? The lack of a punch line.

What does a grandmas vagina taste like? I don't know -- nor do I want to.

What do you call a black man without a job? A man disenfranchised by the failing American economy.

A Muslim terrorist walks onto a bus, with the mindset to blow him and the other 27 people up*. Before he steps onto the bus, he realizes the error in his ways and decides to not follow through. He goes to the airport instead.

Whats wrong with me? Your alive.

What do you call a puppy with one eye, one ear, and one leg? An ugly mother f*cker.

Q. How do you make your neighbor mad? A. Run his kids over.

Your mama's so skinny; she can fit into most swimsuits sizes 4-6 and has a rather petite bottom.

Whats more ugly then seeing a raccoon and a frog f*cking Your mom

Q:What is harder than nailing ten dead babies to a tree? A:Nailing one dead baby to ten trees.

Roses are Red, Violets are Blue, I am homeless, Can I have some food?

Your mother is so unintelligent that her IQ score is equal to or lower than 2 standard deviations below the national average of 100 on the Mensa approved intelligence test that has been properly administered and supervised.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...