What did the father say to his child Christmas morning? you're adopted

Why didn't the boy cross the road? Because there was traffic moving at high speed and he didn't want to be paralyzed from the waist down

knock knock who's there? Dave Dave who? Dave proceeds to break into tears as his grandmother's alzheimers has progressed to the point where she no longer remembers him.

I woke up today

What's worse then finding a worm in your apple? Women's Rights

Have you seen Stevie wonders new house..... It's ok he hasn't either.

what do you call an old man missing a toe? a diabetic.

A duck walks into a bar. A horse walks into a bar. A cow walks into a bar. A bear walks into a bar. The owner tells them to get out, but they can't understand humans. So they just stayed there.

What do you call a black priest? A black priest

Noses are red, Lips are blue, I have hypothermia, So do you.

"Your moms so fat I jiggled my pickle and she jumped with tortoise." Is what I would say if I was retarded. Downvote this shiz!

What's green and has wheels? PAIN!!! I lied about the green and the wheels.

Loperson

What's the difference between a gay and a homo?...........WTF I DON'T KNOW!?!?!?!?

Why did the black man cross the road? Because he lived an worked on opposite sides of the road, and so consequently needed to cross the road to work, and provide an income for his family, so they could have fresh food, clean water, and have money to pay the bills such as the mortgage so they didnt become poor and homeless, which would inevitably lead to illness and an early death for them all.

What is the difference between a pizza and a Black guy? A pizza can serve a family of four.

Q:Why did the man have a lot of Hoes? A: He was an experienced Agriculturalist.

What do Chinese people call Chinese food? Food.

hipsters

Why did Susie fall off the swing Because she had no arms. Knock knock... Whose there... Not Susie Why did the plane crash Susie was flying it

What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? Being raped by a giant scorpion.

why didn't santa deliver any presents this christmas? Because he isn't real

What did little Suzy get for Christmas? Molested

A man walks into the bar and ask the bartender for a shot of vodka. He drinks the vodka.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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