I walked down a dark alley at night and ran into 2 black men. They said hello and were on their way

thumb_up thumb_down +224

Why can't Hellen Keller drive? Because she's a woman

thumb_up thumb_down +16

"Knock Knock." "Who's there?" "I am." "Okay, come in."

thumb_up thumb_down +17

Doctor Doctor! I think i'm epileptic! I'm not the Doctor, I'm the receptionist. You're a hypochondriac, now wait in the Que, like everybody else Mrs. Davis.

thumb_up thumb_down -15

Why is the chicken on the road? Cuz he died trying to get to the other side.

thumb_up thumb_down -6

Roses are red, Violets are blue. I have schizophrenic, and don't have any friends

thumb_up thumb_down -15

What happened to the boy when he did nothing? The game.

thumb_up thumb_down -64

There were three elephants in a bathtub. One said, "Pass me the soap." The other one said, "What do you think I am? A Radio???"

thumb_up thumb_down -14

two kids find a condom so they decide to show their mum the mum snatched it off them saying never to touch one of them again the kids went to their room "Mum sounded pretty angry about that thing "Lucky we didnt tell her about the yohgurt we drank out of it

thumb_up thumb_down -15

While driving at night, a man accidently runs down a young child. Devastated, he runs out of the car and begins to break down. He screams up at the sky "Why God? Why?". And God says nothing, because he's not real.

thumb_up thumb_down -51

Your dad is so fat that he is on a diet.

thumb_up thumb_down +131

Who is a better president, Bush or Obama? Both have their Pros and Cons.

thumb_up thumb_down +31

Why did the blonde shoot her dog? Because it had rabies

thumb_up thumb_down +209

Two guys walk into a bar to get out of the rain and have a drink after a long day of work. The first guy orders a bottle of imported beer sits down and begins to drink. After waiting his turn the second guy also orders a bottle of imported beer but because he is Polish he does it incorrectly and awkwardly

thumb_up thumb_down +54

How many illegal immigrants does it take to change a lightbulb? Why should his legal status matter at all in this situation?

thumb_up thumb_down +308

A man with two broken legs walks into a bar.

thumb_up thumb_down -19

The blond detective was searching a crime scene and replied to the police officer, "I smell something fishy about this situation." She was on her period as a matter of fact, and bled all over her trousers.

thumb_up thumb_down +3

A gay man named pat played on a gay website with a child named Charlie

thumb_up thumb_down -14

Two rolls are hanging on a wall..... On falls down and the other ones name is Erwin

thumb_up thumb_down -17

A black man walks into a movie theatre... And pay for a ticket that would grant him access to watch the verity Of movies available to watch that month of screening. He picks the warhorse which was critically acclaimed by many respected critics. He watched and observed the positive and negative points of the the film. When it ended he took a long a ride home on the number 76 bus to ibswitch road where he lived during that time, and wrote about his opionion on the movie and how he thought the movie could be improved. He done this same routen for another six months, every saturday, until he died of aids shorty after a homosexual fling.

thumb_up thumb_down -4

What's three times More dangerous than a war? Three wars

thumb_up thumb_down +12

"Would you like to see our stool samples?" asked the salesman. 10 minutes later, I left with 3 new bar stools.

thumb_up thumb_down +18

What's worse than some one spitting in your food Hitler revealing he's actually a Jew

thumb_up thumb_down +16

What did the farmer say when he lost his tractor? "Wheres my tractor?"

thumb_up thumb_down -23

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops