Dude man, I'm high...

Knock Knock (No response) Knock knock (No response)

what kind of pizzas did the twin tower executives order on 9-11? two large "planes"

Why do chickens have feathers? Because chickens are birds and birds have feathers.

roses are red violets are blue i need a pee and so do u

A few lice were drinking wine on a scalp. It is quite strange that a person had wine on their scalp.

How often do you remember a dream? Well what if I told you that this is a dream go ahead pinch your arm. You probably didn't feel pain. And just incase jump out a fifth story window. Come on do it. Now if you are still reading this you are either dreaming or didn't jump out the window. Shame on you!!!!!!

Q: What time do you see a Chinese dentist? A: Never because China has a flawed healthcare system due to overpopulation. It is a sad and sobering reality of the plight of the Chinese citizens.

What's the difference between hot tea and cold tea? The temperature.

Why did the vulture cross the road? To get to the pile of dead babies left over from the Holocaust.

I was trying to think of a joke to write, but then I became unsatisfied with my creativity and began to spiral into a depressing tangent of thoughts. I just took 37 Ambien, and have approximately ten minutes to live. Instead, I will spend my last moments writing goodbye messages to friends on Facebook and longingly looking at images of the past. Goodbye, world.

Roses are red violets are blue this poem is stupid.

Why did the chicken cross the road? To get to the other side. Why did the baby cross the road? It was stapeled to the chicken

Why did the chicken crose the rode? Because there was a 10 foot scorpion chaseing it

Nicholas Cage

What do you put on top of salad? Salad Dressing.

How do you torture a turtle? If you came up with an answer to that question you are completely and utterly unethical and immoral.

Dear Sarah, My name is Jesse, and I am severely overweight. BOUNCE ON MY DICK LIKE TYGA BITCH, Your lover, Jesse.

How do you tell if someone likes butter? You ask them

What do have when a lawyer is buried up to his neck in sand? What you probably have is a lawyer on holiday with his children, allowing himself or herself to be buried in order to please said children.

potatoes

Life is like swimming. When you drown you die.

Ed Milliband looks like an amphibian.

what did the man say when he walked into the bar? ouch!

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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