What did Helen Keller say to the priest? Nothing, she didn't know he was there.

a carrot walks into a bar, carrots cant walk for they do not have legs.

Whats brown a sticky, shit

Woman's rights

what do you call a dog with not legs? it doesn't matter what you call it, its not coming

Q. Whats long and and can drip out fluids? a tap.

whats the difference between and black guy and a bench? a bench can supoort a family

whats long black, eight inches and sometimes has white on the tips of them? a black mans foot the wears an eight inch shoe.

What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? A worm in your intestinal tract.

Explain the term 'Standard of Living'? Not having sex with diseased and obese women.

Why did the little pig squeal? Because he was going through blades at a slaughter house.

why did the painter cry? he didnt have any paint left...

penis

What did one muffin say to the other muffin? Oh my gosh a talking muffin.

What's worse then getting a broken bone? A large marsupial charging at you with vicious speed

What has two legs and is red all over? Half a cat.

"I have some good news and some bad news, which do you want to hear first?" The good news. "There is no bad news." Then what's the bad news? "There is no bad news.

Why did god make asians? I dont know. Yah, me niether

Knock, Knock Whos there? Docter Docter who? Yes its me, Craig Who your docter, I have the test results back Im afriad its positive,you've only got a few months left

A man walks into a bar hes later assassinated and mourned by his family.

why didnt the old man go to his sons birthday he died.........nah i lied he went went

Q: What's Funnier than a baby spinning around a pole at 300 MPH? A: Stopping it with a shovel.

I like my women like I like my coffee, a brewed beverage prepared from the roasted seeds of an evergreen shrub of the genus Coffea.

Why is 6 afraid of 7? Because 7 brutally raped and murdered 6's family

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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