What's one very bad way to injure yourself? Smashing your head against a metal surface

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How many feminists does it take to change a light bulb? Trick question; feminists can't change anything.

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What did the Cow say to the Chicken? Nothing animals cant talk

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Q: Why did the clown fall off the swing? A:He was shot in the face

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A Mexican, an Italian and an American all walk into a bar. They order their drinks and have pleasant conversation, and all return home to loving families safely and securely.

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What did the cripple kid get for Christmas? Cancer. You know what he got the next the next Christmas? Nothing he died.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? It wanted honey. Why did the chicken cross the road? It wanted to get to his house. Why did the chicken cross the road? It was stupid.

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So, why is winter so terrible? Because, Napoleon was stopped by winter and we aren't all French.

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If there are 3 apples, and you take 2, how many do you have? BLAM! Texas castle law, motherfukker!

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There are four worms walking in a straight line. The first worm says, "Hey, there's a worm walking behind me!" The second worm says, "Hey, there's a worm walking behind me, too!" The third worm says, "Hey, there's a worm walking behind me, too!" The fourth worm says, "Hey, there's a worm walking behind me, too!" How can this be? ...the fourth worm lied!

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Elvis presley was taking a poop and couldnt poop cause he was dead.

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A blonde was taking a Math exam, so she brought her Asian boyfriend with her. It turns out they were going to his father's retirement party afterwards.

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What did the framer say when he lost his tractor? Where's my tractor?

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Adeeeellllleeeee where are my shorts

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why didn't the baby cry once it came out of the womb? because it was a stillborn.

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Q: What is the difference between a duck? A: That question doesn't make any sense.

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What's worse than your dad being hit by a car? Your family being hit by a bus.

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Knock Knock. Whose there? ..............

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A hooded black man walks into a Convenience store. He orders a cup of hot chocolate as it is very cold outside.

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what did the old lady die of old age...

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what happens when u mix a car, a blimp and a plane? I don't know.

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Knock knock? Who's there? Alzheimer's, Alzheimer's who? Knock knock? Who's there? Alzheimer's, Alzheimer's who? Knock knock? Who's there? Alzheimer's, Alzheimer's who? Knock knock? Who's there? Alzheimer's, Alzheimer's who?

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What do you call a black Jew that is also a crippled midget with no family except for an autistic brother? His original name that his mother gave him at birth.

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What do you call postman pat without a job? Pat.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops