Q: is this the krusty krab? A: No this is patrick!

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whats the difference between a snail? - both legs are the same lenght, especially the left one.

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How do you scare a blonde? Put the barrel of a gun to the side of her head.

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Four blonds are driving to Disneyworld. They finally get to Florida and they see a sign that says "Disneyworld: left" so they turned around and went home

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why did the guy drop his umbrella........ because he was getting raped.

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What's worse than finding a worm in your apple ? Finding an apple in your worm !!! ... Wait, what ?

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A Polish man came home one day from work, hung up his coat, took off his hat and walked into his bedroom shouting "honey I'm home!" What should he see but his best friend in bed with his wife. Infuriated, he rushed to the cupboard, pulled out his gun, put it to his head, pulled the trigger, and died instantly. His children and lecherous wife are forever scarred.

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A kid walks into a bar. He leaves wasted.

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Me: Knock Knock, Pornstar: Cum in.

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What would happen if you threw 50 plates off of your roof? Nothing. No one in their right mind would do that. Besides, who owns 50 plates?

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Roses are red. Violets are blue. I don't know where i was going with this one.... Refrigerator

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A young girl walks into a dark alley. She emerges a few minutes later unharmed and goes about her day.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Since chickens cannot speak, it is difficult to say.

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Why did the chickecross the roe? Because I was bein chased by an angry group o mobsters that 8 years ago were busted by the chicken when he was still working for NYPD and found them all in an ally and busted them for later discovered tax evasion and then 2 years later they found a way ou of prison and tracked down the chicken for 6 years until they found him in road island 4509 lake side estates and then proceeded to chase him onto and across a road that was near by to his lake side apartment and then they go tire and we. Back to their HQ in NY and then the leader of the gang went home and in a depression fuels rage mersiouy beat his wife then went up stairs and threw his 9 year old son out the window and hanged himself. The chicken also died because 8 years is at the top of their lifespan.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Unbeknownst to the farmer, the pen holding the chickens inside the farm had fallen due to bad weather. The chicken unknowingly wandered onto the road nearby. Thankfully it was rescued some minutes later.

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Explain the term 'Standard of Living'? Not having sex with diseased and obese women.

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My grandmother always said "slow and steady wins the race."...... She died in a fire

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what do a parrot and a hippo have in common? i want to kill every non white human being!!!!

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What's invisible and smells like a carrot? A rabbit's fart.

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There once was an Asian kid who got a B+ in Math. He was later yelled at and beat by his parents.

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What do u call a guy makin dinner? Gay.

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knock knock Who's there? because 7 ate 9

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guess what? What? you have to guess...your mama

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How did Hitler fit 100 Jews in his car? Ashes don't take up much space.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops