What's big, wet and yellowish-green at midnight? I don't know. That's why I'm asking.

whats big and green and if it fell out of a tree it would kill you? a snooker table

A knock knock B who's there A your newborn give me your money or I will hang all your kids

Whats the difference between me and a ghost? What? Ghost are not dolphins

What did one Black college student say to another? What is your major?

Why did the chicken cross the road? Because the Crossing Guard union had reached a collective agreement and they had returned to work and it was safe to cross once again.

Knock Knock Who’s there? Tom Tom who? Tom Pearson? Oh Tom, I wasn’t expecting you til 3pm, please come in.

Do you know why I am excited? I don't know I'm asking you.

An airplane flies due north at 100 m/s through a 30 m/s cross wind blowing from the east to the west. Determine the resultant velocity of the airplane.

What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? Finding out your Grandmother died.

Why did the boy lick the window? He had Down's syndrome

the website says jokes, yet these are all facts.

what did the black guy say to his pregnant wife? im very excited to see our newborn child.

A couple of years back a went to chile for a day, I was then trapped underground for 70 days...

Knock knock. Come in.

q ggggggggggggggggg

I'm funnY!!! Haha pënis

Did you fall from heaven? Because I seem to notice fractures to your knee, spine and a possible permanent risk of poor posture.

Two dogs are sitting by a fire hydrant. One turns to the other and says absolutely nothing because dogs can't speak.

What made the old man laugh? A pile of dead babies.

You just wasted time of your life reading this, and perhaps even more wasted time thumbing this down.

There were 3 women, a blonde, a brunette, and a redhead. They were driving with a gorilla when suddenly the car crashed. All the women died but only the gorilla survived. The police investigated with the gorilla and did some simple sign language. The police, using hand motions, asked the gorilla what each individual female was doing before the car crashed. The gorilla ran away for reasons unknown.

Where is my tractor?

Why can't George Washington sit up straight? He's dead.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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