Q. What did the farmer say when he lost his tractor? A. "Where's my tractor?"

A deaf man walks into a bar. A few minutes later, cops come in and takes the poor man into the cop car and takes him downtown to the precinct for booking. Meanwhile, back in the bar the deaf man drinks his beer and converses with the bartender in sign language.

Q: What did the little boy with cancer get for Christmas? A: Nothing, he didn't make it that far

What did the doctor say to the patient? You have cancer.

How do you turn a frown upside down? You cannot do such a thing because frowning is the act of sadness. Therefore you cannot nor should not change a persons attitude.

What african eat for christmas Sand.

Jesus said unto John, "Come forth and receive eternal life." But, John came fifth and won a toaster.

Yo momma so fat that she was diagnosed with obesity and may need medical assistance in the future and will be reliant on you, her child.

What nickname do you give Harrison Kinney if he is good at remixing music? Harrison "Remix" Kinney

"Oi Tom" "What Tom?" "What did Tom say to Tom?" He was talking to himself Such a bad anti-joke

What do you call a dozen Muslims waiting to board a train? Passengers...you racist.

Q: What is George Harrison's favorite hairstyle? A: How can we know? He's dead!

It says so on your cap.

Why did the boy drop his ice cream? Because he was hit by a bus.

Why did the baby cross the road? Because I took a swing at it with a golf club.

what's the worst lie in the universe? I swear to god that was my last piece of gum

why is walmart so big? Years ago a man named Sam Walton had a vision for one stop shopping and affordable low prices. And it goes without saying that being a one stop shop must mean you have a lot of inventory thus the size of walmart is a lot larger to hold and support the increased mass of inventory .

What do you call a person with disabilities? Names.

Jesus was born and rased a jew

People who find just saying 69 is the funniest thing ever.

How do you make a kid with ADHD stay still? Shoot him in the knee cap

Why did the chicken cross the road? It didn't, it was hit by a bus.

Your mama is so fat... Haha, that's a good joke.

whats red, brown and blown up? a hampster in a microwave

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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