what's black and hangs from a tree in my garden? a blackberry

Alcoholic walks into a bar and then walks out because he promised his children and wife that he would straight out his life.

who did the strait guy marry? a woman

It's time to kick ass and chew bubblegum... ...and I'm all out of ass but still have plenty of bubblegum to sit down and chew in a quiet and leisurely manner.

What's the difference between a jew and pizza? A Jew is human and pizza is food.

Why is evan a lil poop? cause he pooped my poop all the pooping ;)

A girl is talking with her boyfriend - God, you're selfish!!! - No, i sell meat.

What does a black man and a monkey have in common? Until February 3rd 1870 neither could vote in America. Monkeys still can't. 

you mooma's like a bowling bowl i pick her up finger her throw her down the gutter and she still comes back for more

What body part do you shave other than your balls? My fridge.

Yo Momma is SO FAT, THAT she has an increased risk of cardiac arrest due to her blood pressure.

Why did Old Man Robert fall down the stairs? Someone kicked him down. And then he died.

A dog walks into a bar. It was a bar in Taiwan, so they killed it and ate it.

Whats worse than not having cellphone service? Having sex unwillingly with a stranger then getting pregnant at the age of 13.

What did Hitler say to Mussolini? I don't know. I wasn't there.

What did one penguin say to the other? Flippty-flop-dop-boop-de-bop. Jazzhands.

Roses are red, violets are blue I've got Alzheimer's cheese on toast

roses are red violets are blue I lost my dog to typhoid it was an unfortunate case of bed luck

A tree falls in the woods. A deaf boy, who had been frolicking through the forest, is struck down by the tree. He dies. His parents are ridden with grief for years, until finally the father commits suicide. The mother soon remarried and had two more children. Both died before the age of 15. She was a horrible mother.

Why so serious? Your brother died.

A plane crashes on the border of the United States and Canada. Where do they bury the survivors? Why would they bury the survivors? THEY'RE ALIVE

What's the difference between a bench and a black guy? A bench can support a family

whats better than 10 babies nailed to 1 tree? 1 baby nailed to 10 trees whats better than 1 baby nailed to 10 trees? 10 trees nailed to 1 baby

What's the same about a clown and a knife? They are both fun, except for the clown. I hate clowns.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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