A Chinese man, a Mexican man and an African man walk into an American bar. None of them know any English and can not order a drink. They walk out promptly, frustrated by the difficulties of living in a strange new world where they don't speak the native language.

There's an Englishman, an Irishman and a Scotsman. They are all trapped in a jail cell. Eventually they all starved to death.

Why are fire trucks red Well fire trucks have 4 wheels, and they have 8 people in them, 4+8, is 12, there are 12 inches in a foot, a foot is a ruler, Queen Elizabeth was a ruler, Queen Elizabeth was a boat, boats sail the seven seas, fish are in the seven seas, fish have fins, the Finns defeated the Russians, Russians are red, And that is why fire trucks are red.

Why did Sally fall off the swing? Because she had no arms.. A: Knock Knock B: Who's there? A: Not Sally

Why didn't the oven turn on? Because nothing turned it on.

What do a bike and a human have in common they are both objects

An apple a day keeps the doctor away. What about the vampires?

Your mom is so fat that she is fat.

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Why can't the blonde dial 911? Because the burglars tied her up and gagged her before they robbed the house and she couldn't do anything until one of the neighbors found her and untied her.

what did the bear say to the fish? Nothing he eat it

Whats worse than breaking your toe? Being raped

whats sad about a jew in a gas tank? nothing.

you walk into a bar Griffin: 'are you ok'

One time i ate a hamberger than an hour later i sneezed but i dont think it had anything to do with the hamberger.

What do you call an African American woman with Tourettes? This question cannot be answered correctly. The African American woman was misdiagnosed. She is really a crack whore.

Q: Why did the black man shit himself? A: He experienced post-mortem bowel release after he was murdered due to his racial identification.

Yo momma's so short, it's probably because she's in a wheelchair.

If vegetarians eat vegetables, what do humanitarians eat? Depends. Some are vegetarians or vegans, while most eat a mixture of vegetables and meat.

Why was the man so cold? He was in a fridge

A redhead walks into a hairdressing salon and asks to have her hair dyed black due to being a subject of bullying and social rudeness.

What did the pineapple say to the cucumber? Nothing...the pineapple was incapable of speech, for twas only an infant.

What did Helen Keller name her dog? Well i would imagine one of various names for a domesticated animal and she would choose the name based on her likes towards nature or an element of nature, being the educated individual she i would think she may name it base on a person of importance, such as an author or maybe a writer that inspires her.

Why was the little girl lying on the floor. Because she got shot.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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