how do you get a cat out of a tree? shoot it

yo momma is so stupid she went and got her self checked for mental retardedness and it turns out she happens to be autistic.

My wife crashed the car while listening to Adele last night. She ended up rolling in the jeep.

What's white and smells like crap? An albino tird. Just kidding, Justin Biebers music.

Did you hear the one about the bus driver? Me neither

What's worst then the holocaust, titanit and 9-11 4 bee stings.

Why did the chicken cross the road? Against city ordinates, an old woman was keeping chickens in her suburban back yard. One escaped, and there was no where else to go.

What'd the kid with no arms or legs get for Christmas? New shoes and some gloves

Mexicans don't use lightbulbs because they can't afford them.

What did the boy get for creating a fantastic AntiJoke? Leukemia

why did the chicken cross the rode?????? i dont know because he felt like it???????????p.s.i actually dont know why he crossed the rode so go ask the next who makes a joke about a chicken crossing a rode?

How do you make 5 lbs of fat look good? Draw a smiley face on it.

Knock, Knock Who's There

Your mother is so fat that when she went to the doctor he recommend she lose weight or risk high blood pressure and heart attack

Why is there velcro on the edge of the table. Because its there to hold the microwave.

A black man and a white man get married... Trick question, since gay marriage is illegal in the United States, the men did not get married, and they later both died alone.

Why did the chicken cross the road? His wife and children had just been struck by a moving vehicle traveling at approximately 45 miles per hour trying to cross the same road. He ran across the road to comfort his dying wife and two children as they took their final breaths. The chicken was also not really a chicken but a middle-aged man who had recently been laid off his job and diagnosed wiuth an incureable disease.

Q: why did the pie cross the road? A: Pie is not a living thing and has no way of transportation, therefor the pie did not cross the road.

Why was the man unable to get an erection? Because he was a woman

What's a computer without Internet? A computer.

What do a woman and a female dog have in common? They were both annoying so I put them down.

Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? It was dead.

Who do you call when you see a ghost on the street? GHOSTBUSTERS!!!! no, ghostbusters are not real, you call the police

Dallas Cowboys

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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