What is the difference between Santa, and a Jew? Santa goes DOWN the chimney

What's the difference between a snake, and a lawyer? A snake cannot comprehend law, nor can one attend law school and set up an office. They are also different species.

Two guys walk into a bar, the third one ducks.

If Abraham Lincoln were alive today, he'd be really really old.

Stop. Seriously stop.

Why'd the man go to jail? Because he had a piece of cheese.

knock knock. Who's there? Jehovah's witness. *Door Locks*

what duz 69 mean? its a number duhhhhhhh

Why couldn't the boy talk? He had his fathers hairy scrote was in his mouth

Welcome to die!

why did jimmy's mom fall off the cliff? i dont know.

Jared Gough is a slut

What's the difference between a live baby and a dead baby? A dead baby doesn't cry.

Ask me if you can see my dinosaur. Can I see your dinosaur? No dinosaurs don't exist sillyhead!

A fat black guy walks into a pet store and asks if he can have a chicken. The cashier says "what do you want a chicken for?" He says " I need to lose weight so I'm hoping to eat its all natural eggs" So the cashier gives him the chicken and the fat black guy lost 50 pounds.

Q: What did the doctor say to his wife? A: Penis.

Nickelback

Why does World of Warcraft advertise on Anti-Joke? Because World of Warcraft is funny in anticlimactic and alternative way

What happened to jimmy when he stepped on a rusty nail? He died of of tetanus.

A Johnson walks into a hole. Why am I in this hole? Because rape is not an option.

Knock Knock Who's there? The police. Your under arrest for drug trafficking and possession of illegal firearms. You have the right to remain silent. Anything you say...

An Englishman, an Irishman, and a Scotsman walk into a bar. They have a few drinks, then go to a club, where they amuse each other and those around them by completely slurring their words in their already very strong regional accents. Then they get a taxi back to the house of the Englishman as he lives nearest, and stay the night. The next morning, the Scotsman and the Irishmen walk home as they are still hungover and do not wish to risk driving.

knock knock who's their panda panda who shut up I never said yo name and don't call me black

"DUDE! THERE IS A KNIFE IN YOUR LEG!" "SERIOUSLY!"

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...