Why couldn't Scruffy get out from under the car? It had parked on his skull.

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What do you get when you multiply a trillion times a billion times a quintillion? A huge ass number.

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How come the mexican couldnt support his family? Wendy's stopped hiring a week ago

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What's the difference between a Jew and a pizza? One is a human being belonging to a particular religious minority and the other is a delicious Italian food favoured by English speaking western cultures. The problem with this anti-joke is that the facts are not correct, pizza was originally invented and China; however,it looked quite different then what might be considered pizza by our standards, when pizza was brought to Italy it was improved to make what we now consider pizza in modern times. While some people may consider pizza an Italian food, this would be failing to give credit to the Chinese who invented it.

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knock knock. who's there? just open. just open who? you're really dumb aren't you

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Why do migets laught when they run? Because the grass tickles their balls.

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Why did Justin Bieber jump out of the airplane? He didn't, i pushed him

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Why did the chicken cross the road? The holocaust.

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Knock knock. Who's there?

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Past, Present and Future walk into a bar. It was tense...

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What did the guy say when he lost his tractor? Wheres my tractor?

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Why did the car catch fire? It was parked in Ferguson, MO

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why does crazy george spin a ball on his fingers well? because he has a huge dingo

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What did the banana say to the peach? Dude, we can talk?

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What's worse than breastfeeding a wolverine? Force-breastfeeding a wolverine.

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What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? Anti-jokes

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Rose are brown, Violets are brown, Who keeps pooping in my garden?

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What is red white and blue Blood. I was lying about the white and blue.

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What's worse than a baby dying of AIDS? It depends upon one's frame of reference. A family living in the US might consider the death of a baby by AIDS a horrible act by the gods. But to a similar family in sub-Saharan Africa, this might be a regular, albeit tragic occurrence.

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What do u call a muslim A infection to America

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Why did Sally fall off her bike? Because sally has no arms. Knock knock Who's there? Not Sally.

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A penguin is walking through the snow, and comes across a polar bear with a hat on. He stops and stares at the polar bear for a second and then compliments the polar bear on his hat. The polar bear smiles and promptly consumes the penguin, build up a fat layer for the coming Winter.

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Q. What did the chicken say to the buffalo? A. Nothing, this is an improbable predicament.

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What happened to the convict on death row? He died

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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