Knock Knock! Who's there? Your landlord. I'm here to collect rent

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How many Mexicans does it take to screw in a lightbulb? One

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My grandmother always use to tell me "slow and steady wins the race." Well, that was before she died in a house fire.

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What did the deaf Jewish Rabbi say to the Italian Priest. What?

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if a white guy, a black guy and a hispanic guy jump off a 10 story building, who hits the ground first? the man who jumped first. racist.

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What's a bit smaller than the tallest man in the world? The 2nd tallest man in the world.

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A blonde goes to the doctor and says, "Doctor, doctor, I feel like a pair of curtains!" "That is a worrying symptom," says the doctor, who immediately recommends the woman for a thorough psychiatric assessment.

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What did the doctor say to the Lawyer? I get paid more

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What do you call a boomerang that doesnt come back? A stick.

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A mexican, Japanese, and American man are eating lunch one day at work by the window. The Mexican says, "Wow! If I get a taco one more time for lunch, I'm gonna jump off this window!" The Japanese man says, "Wow! If I get a bowl or ramen one more time for lunch, I'm gonna jump off this window!" The American says" If I get grilled cheese one more time, I'm gonna jump off this window!" The next day, the mexican jumped off because he got a taco. Then, the japanese man jumped off for getting ramen. Then, the American jumped off for getting a grilled cheese sandwhich. At the funeral, the mexican wife said, "Oh if i knew he was gonna jump, I would'nt have packed it." The japanese wife said, "If I knew he was gonna jump, I wouldn't have packed it either." The American wife didn't say anything because she was hit by a bus.

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Why did Sally fall off the swing? She had no arms.

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What do you call a black man who flys an airplane? A Pilot

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What did the hammer say to the drill? Nothing, they don't talk stupid.

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A lion walks into a barber shop and asks for a haircut and the barber says no then the lion proceeds to kill everyone in the shop

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why did a girl walk down the alley? because her name was alley!

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why did the little girl get her hair cut? she has cancer.

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Jerry: Hi what's your name? Bob: My name is bob. Jerry: Bob, nice to meet you, my name is Jerry. Bob: Nice to meet you Jerry.

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How do you kill a blonde? You shoot them in the head with a revolver.

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* Are you deaf? * Yes, as I love paradoxes.

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How many arabs can fit in a 2007 honda accord? legally up to 5

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take out the f in way. there is no f in way. I see what you did there.

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What do you get when you fall in love? A guy with a pin to burst your bubble.

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This is like another one: Terry is at work eating a cookie.. He drops his cookie. His co worker trys to pick it up, however he accidently stands on it. Turns out terry can keep a grudge, nine years later, he killed his co worker with a shovel.

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Why couldn't the ten year old watch a porno movie? Because it was on blu-ray and his family only owned a regular dvd player.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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