why do they call it history? Women didn't do shit

In Soviet Russia, Joke isn't funny!

The NBA lockout

What do you get when you reverse Zelda's Lullaby ? Skyward Sword's theme.

Why was Helen Keller deaf, blind, and a woman? She was a bad driver.

roses are red violets are blue flowers come in many colors

I like my coffee the way I like my women.....without a penis.

you want to hear a joke? the goverment.

Whats funny about ISIS? Nothing, you asshole, its terrifying.

If I could rearrange the alphabet, I'd probably put all the labials, coronals and dorsals in separate places sorted into plosives, nasals and fricatives, with the vowels at the beginning sorted by their relative IPA chartings, to make it more logical and easily attainable to foreigners.

What's green and can dance? A Cloud. I lied.

Knock knock. Who's there? Dr. Dr who? Dr Johnson. I'm afraid you have AIDS.

A dyslexic man walks into a bra. Fortunately, the bra was on display in a clothing store and was not actually being worn at the time.

what did the chickpea say to the raison when he got called big but? Atleast i dont have a stick up my but.

Sherlock Holmes and Dr. Watson are camping out. After they set up their tent and get inside to go to sleep, they look up at the stars. Holmes asks Watson to make a deduction. "Well, Holmes, I think it's highly probable that other planets outside our own, among those many stars up there, could have sentient life." Holmes points up and says, "Someone stole our tent, you idiot."

One day, while a blonde was out driving her car, she ran into a truck. The truck's driver made her pull over into a parking lot and get out of the car. He took a piece of chalk and drew a circle on the pavement. He told her to stand in the middle and not leave the circle. Furious, he went over to her car and slashed the tires. The blonde got angry and called the cops, who proceeded to come and arrest him.

Why did the chicken cross the road? Because you simply have a chicken joke WITHOUT it crossing the road

A daring man once said "Here goes nothing!" Anddd nothing happened.

Whats worse then finding a worm in your apple? Finding a worm in your pear.

Q: why did the girl fall off the swing?? A: because she had no arms or legs.

What is the difference between Jews and the boyscouts? The boyscouts come home from camp.

A man walks into a psychiatrists office with a banana in his ear, The psychiatrist says, why do you have that banana in your ear. The man says, "What?" The psychiatrist says, "I said, 'Why do you have that banana in your ear?" The man says, "What?" The psychiatrist shouts, "I SAID, WHY DO YOU HAVE THAT BANANA IN YOUR EAR?" The man says, "Sorry, I can't hear you, I'm deaf." (props- Marty Smith)

What's a black man that drives a bus? A bus-driver

What do you get when you cross a tho with a mas THOMAS!!!!!

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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