What's white and smells like crap? An albino tird. Just kidding, Justin Biebers music.

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Why was the mother sad? Because she had just watched her beloved baby get shoved in a blender.

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How many licks does it take to get to the center of a Tootsie roll pop? It would have to take a reasonable amount of licks for enough enzymes in the saliva to breakdown the hard candy part.

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Q. What's cold and has no feelings? A. A pole

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Roses are red. Violets are red. Your garden's on fire.

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ASUS Live Update has stopped working.

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Why does people with tourettes curse so much? Fuck should I know?

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Hey Bill, did you know we have a black guy in our family tree? Really? Yeah, he's still hanging there

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Yo mama's so fat, she has low self-esteem.

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What do you call a muslim? A terrorist

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What's the difference between Jews and pizza? Pizza doesn't scream when you put it into an oven.

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What is brown and sticky? A stick.

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How are elephants and plumbs the same? A: They are both purple, except for the elephant.

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why did the chicken stop in the middle of crossing the road? to get to the other side

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What do you call two dead blondes? A terrible day for their families and for many more to come

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My friend came in the barber's shop and asked me to cut his hair for him, i always have rude banter with him and i made a joke about his big bate nose. He acused me of calling him Jewish and threatened to sue me. This is how i found out that he was a white supremisist.

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What did they farmer say when he lost his tractor? Where is my tractor?

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Roses are red Violets are blue Who is your daddy And what does he do?

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a little girl is playing outside of her house when i man in a van approaches her and stops to ask if the girl will help him find his puppy and that he has some gandy. seeing as the girl has a great love for animals she gets in the van. the man and the little girl drive around until they find the puppy. the man is so overjoyed her rewards the girl with candy. he then drives her back to her house and she feels wonderful having helped the man find his puppy. the end.

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World peace

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What's more epic than a man in a gorilla suit? A man i a gorilla suit with a banana.

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Why did the man fall off his bike? Because he wasn't on a bike.

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roses are red violets are blue you think shes hot? how BLIND are you?

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Your dad is so gay, he lovingly marries another man and selflessly adopts you.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops