I guess we will have to see, if I where to one day use my ways of thinking with the intention to become the most corrupt politician of them all, do you think I would succeed?

A man named Jack has three kids. The oldest is named Jordan, the middle one is named Kim, and the youngest is named Alex. One day Jordan walked up to his father and asked him how his day was. His father replied, "It was fine."

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A priest, a paedophile and a rapist walk into a bar. And that's just the first guy

what is green and red and goes 100 miles per hour? frog in a blender

Why don't they sell pharmaceuticals in the rain forest? Because it is to sparsely populated and not economically viable.

Q; why did the German ask the Jew to go in his shower? A; because the Jew had stayed the night at the Germans house.

why did the chicken cross the road? To get to the retard's house *knock knock* who's there? the chicken

What did the Mexican say to the Black guy? Nice to meet you Mr. President. I'm Antonio Villaraigosa, the Mayor of Los Angeles.

What do you call a Mexican that swam across the border? An illegal immigrant.

A French man, Irish man and Japanese man walk into a bar, seeing as the men speak different languages no conversation begins.

Two hunters are out in the woods when one of them collapses. He doesn't seem to be breathing and his eyes are glazed. The other guy whips out his phone and calls the emergency services. He gasps, "My friend is dead! What can I do?". The operator says "Calm down. I can help. First, let's make sure he's dead." There is a silence, then the man said "he has a pulse". The operator then calmly stated "we are sending a helicopter to air lift him out of there as we speak". The man got helicoptered to the nearest ER, and the doctors did their best to save him. He ended up having to go on life support for three years until his family members finally decided to pull the plug. The medical insurance didn't cover life support and the family went broke because of it.

Three nuns walk into a bar. They realize they are in a place they don't want to be, so they leave, casting furtive glances around, fearing that someone from their congregation will see them and think they went in to drink.

why did the lesbians shop at modell's? because they thought the store had reasonable prices and considerable discounts

Why did the little girl fall off the swing? Because she had no arms.

What's the difference between your wife and the kitchen? One is a living organism

Q) what happens when you tackle someone with 2 legs? A) you fall over

A: Ask me if I'm a tree. B: Are you a tree? A: psh, no! *gives offended look and walks away*

Three guys walk into a bar. The four man hastily ducks, grabs his phone and calls the local paramedic.

a:two guys are white but one of the guys can only see black and white so he said dude you black he said no so they have a race who won :nobody they both got hit by a bus then a car then a donkey eaea then a horse

Two cows are in a field. Suddenly, from behind a bush, a rabbit leaps out and runs away. One cow looks round a bit, eats some grass and then wanders off.

What did the penguin do in the desert? He died .

What did the cancer patient get for Christmas? Nothing, she didn't make it that far.

Two corns were decided to get married. In wedding, bridegroom can't find bride, so he asked a popcorn next to him, "Do you know where is the bride?" The popcorn answered, "I just change my hair style."

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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