I'm at a payphone. Though I'm out of change so I'm unable to call my girlfriend and break up with her.

What happens if you come across an elephant in the jungle?. You wipe it up What happens if an elephants comes across you in the jungle? Swim

a man walks into the doctors office and says DOCTOR!, DOCTOR! IT HURTS TO BEND MY LEG!!! the doctor replies then dont bend your leg and the mans great pain eventually heals

What did the girl with no arms and no legs get for christmas? a pair of shoes and gloves

Why shouldn't you go to California? Because there are sharks there, obviously.

knock, knock. come in.

Roses are red, Violets are red, Holy crap, the garden's on fire.

Why did the mexican cross the street? Because the next lawn to mow was in a different neighborhood

Why did the chicken cross the road? To get to the idiot's house... Knock knock Who's there? The Chincken

Why were there teeth marks in the guys arm? He bit himself

Ask me if I'm on a horse. Are you on a horse? Yes, are you on a horse? No. Oh...

What has wheels and spins round and round? A dog in a wheelchair.

whats up fuch you bitch

Why did Suzie get raped? because she was out past her bedtime. and the morale to this story is that its funny to be raped.

Why did the chicken cross the road? To meet his friend the horse at a bar

What did the monkey say to the garbage collector? Eiiiiijajajaajaja

Why did Sally flunk math? Because she didn't achieve the passing grade which is 60 percent or greater. She might need some tutoring in order to master the concept of the lessons to which she has difficulty solving.

Why did the boy cross the street He didnt he got hit by a plane instead

What did the female lady person say to the baby? Get Some.

Why did the boy eat the chips? Because he was hungry

What is black and white and red all over? Interracial sex partners with smallpox.

what does the muslim guy say in a very busy metro station? jaallalalalalalalalla BAM

Have you seen Stevie wonder's new mansion? No..... Either has he

There's a Christian preist, Jesus, and a Jewish rabi on a boat. They want to go fishing, but they forgot the sunscreen, the bait, and the fishing line. The Christian preist walks across the water and goes and gets the Sunscreen. Jesus walks across the water and gets the bait. The Jewish rabi steps out of the boat and drowns. Jesus turns to the Priest and says, "Do you suppose we should have told about the underwater bridge?"

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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