What do you do when you see an epileptic having a fit in the bath? Take him out of the bath, make sure there is nothing they can hurt themselves on, put something soft under their head and loosen their clothing if it’s constricting their breathing.

What are the things that define you? The things that define you.

whats wores than eating a vag. a gaint vag eating you.

What is black and red? Something that is black and red.

I agree Detroit sux. But the bulls suk too ya know

Why did the chicken cross the road? Because he was crudely stapled to another chicken who insisted on doing so.

how do you wake up a black man? scream!!!!!

What's worse than a pile of dead babies? A large Albanian man jizzing on the pile.

What's worse than the Holocaust? Your Mom.

Why was the boy crying? Because he had previously driven over innocent civilians who were all constipated and had now caused a mild to extremely large shitstorm.

There are two muffins in the oven. One says: "It's really getting hot in here!" The other one can't reply because it is already dead.

why did the chicken cross the road ...WHO FREAKING CARES!!!!

A girl said to her boyfriend, "you take my breath away." The boy said, "that isn't possible" and they proceeded to have sex.

What happened to the man who grew into the couch? He was surgically removed and forced to exercise daily. He is feeling much better now.

Why did the bird fall? It was an ostrich

What did the hammer say to the screwdriver? You're a tool

what's funny about cancer. nothing it is a serious life threating disease with no cure.

this is gay

Why did the tomato blush? It didn't - red is the natural colour for ripe tomatoes.

What did the mouse say to the elephant? Squeak.

how do you kill jesus? with a knife

The geese of Growmore

Mahmy

I Have a Black Friend

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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