How do you stop a baby crying? You don't. Just walk away.

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why did the little boy put a bandaid on his knee. it doesn't really matter, he has cancer.

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Why couldn't Timmy ride his tricycle? He was run over by a bus.

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How do you get pikachu on a bus? Rape his wife and point a gun to his head and tell him that he'd better get on the damn bus before you shoot him. Btw sorry if I just double posted. I am on an iPad at school.

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What is the difference between tea pot and shinkansen? shinkansen is very quick train and tea pot is traditional piece of dishes..

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i know a guy called ryan he is a benny he has a combover

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Your dad is so hairy, that he shaves to look more cleanly.

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What do you call a big group of Chinese people on Mars? An extraordinary feat for the Chinese space program and a historic day in human history, where a particular country has set up the first human colony on another planet and we have proven to ourselves that our race is capable of interplanetary travel and can accomplish anything if we set our minds to it.

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Knock, Knock! Who`s there? Your mama`s stupid! Your mama`s stupid who? Your mama`s stupid as a rock! I` m going to cut your eyes out and use them as baseballs!

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Why did the black man get arrested? Because he was in possession of powder cocaine, which is a schedule I narcotic in the United States. This incident probably would not have happened if an end was put to the war on drugs, which is notorious for disproportionately targeting blacks and other minority groups, even though whites are statistically more likely to use such substances.

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roses are red , violets are blue i love bernard he loves me too if you take him from my place i'll smash my fist in your face.

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Whats smells like a banana and is purple? A banana, I lied about the purple thing.

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What do you get when you cross a black man and a mule. Arrested.

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What's the difference between Justin Bieber and R. Kelly? One is an arrogant asshole known for pissing on things, the other is R. Kelly.

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Want to get shot? Go to Virginia Tech. Too Soon?

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Q:where did the little kid go? A:wait, before or after i killed him

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why was the fork in the wall? Why would a fork be in a wall?

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so there is a 13 year old boy who got left home while the rest of his family was driving to colorado, so the police comes to his door, and says son your whole family has just died in a plane accident. And the boy says, but my family was driving. . . the policeman then says, i'm aware, the plane act

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Why did the Asian woman crash her car? She couldn't see through the slits she called eyes.

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Stones cannot fly. Humans cannot fly either. Therefore.. I wish I didn't get AIDS...

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Why did the man climb to top of the tower? To push the Jew off.

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Why couldn't the teenager go to the pirate movie? He didn't have any money.

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What Do you call a black priest? Holy shit!

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When did the War of 1812 begin? 1963.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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