What do Lebron James and Bill Murray have in common? They are both black basketball players. Except for bill murray

What is the difference between a black person and a bicycle? You can sell a bicycle legally.

Which came first the egg or the chicken? The chicken because eggs can't cross the road

Why did the blonde get fired from the M&M factory? Because she was a very poor worker.

Whats the difference between a black man and a pizza? One has a complex circulatory system the other is a pizza.

A family walks into a talent agency. It's a father, mother, son, daughter and dog. The father says to the talent agent, "We have a really amazing act. You should represent us." The agent says, "Sorry, I don't represent family acts. They're a little too cute." The mother says, "Sir, if you just see our act, we know you would want to represent us." The agent says, "OK. OK. I'll take a look." The father begins by juggling some balls. The mother pulls out her harmonica and begins playing "Dixie". The children and dog try and get the dog to jump through a hoop. For the longest time, the agent just sits in silence. Finally, he manages, "That's a hell of an act. What do you call it?" And the father says, "The Aristocrats!"

What is the difference between a mexican and a bench? One is living, one is not.

What is the diffrence between you and I. I am not sure because i have not meet you yet

What did the parakeet say to the grapefruit? Nothing. Parakeets can't speak.

What time is it? 10:58

Tomorrow, today's yesterday.

Why was 6 scared of 7? Because 7,8,9

what did the dog say when he walked in to a bar? Bark

In an alternate universe, Jake Sulley's brother did not die. The human race proceeded to strip-mine Pandora of all its mineral wealth, and slaughtered the entire indigenous population.

A man walks into a psychiatrists office with a banana in his ear. The psychiatrist says, why do you have that banana in your ear. The man says, "What?" The psychiatrist says, "I said, 'Why do you have that banana in your ear?" The man says, "What?" The psychiatrist shouts, "I SAID, WHY DO YOU HAVE THAT BANANA IN YOUR EAR?" The man says, "Sorry, I can't hear you, I'm deaf." (props- Marty Smith)

What did the Jewish kid get for Christmas? Nothing, Jews don't celebrate Christmas.

what's the difference between a zebra and a horse They are spelled differently

Roses are red, Violet are blue, This is Sparta, I am a chair

a retard walks into a bar a bruise appeared on his head

Found out my dad was gay the other day. Now I have to take him to dance clubs, take him to musicals and find the man who gave birth to me.

So three men walk into a bar and buy a round of drinks for everyone. As they do this, three kenyans die of dehydration while their families weep at their feet.

roses are white violets are green if you you sit on santas lap he will stab you

There's this Priest, a Rabbi and a Preacher talking about how similar they are.

In an all out brawl between the casts of Gilligan's Island, Hogan's Heroes and the Brady Bunch, who would be the winner? The Viewer

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...