What did the little boy with no arms and no legs get for Christmas? A Drumset.

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Why do black people have white hands? Palms and soles are not in direct sunlight, and therefore less amounts of melanin are produced in those regions.

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a woman leaves the kitchen.......

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When Kurt Cobain was little, his mother told him to never play with guns but I guess it went through one ear and out the other.

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A blonde woman walked into a bar. She ordered a scotch.

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Q:Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? A:Because it wa dead!!!!!!

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Oh, I must be hearing things.

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National security?

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Jesus said unto John, "Come forth and receive eternal life." But, John came fifth and won a toaster.

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What's worse than being forced to drink your own urine and eat a disabled kids poop? James Holmes (Ironic that the text I had to type in to post this was "I'M BATMAN".)

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What is white a can't climb up a tree? A fridge.

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How do you get 100 Africans in a phone box? Throw a can of beans in there.

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Me: Sometimes I like to talk to myself. Me: So do I.

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What isn't funny? The holacost.

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Alright alright Tifa, you look totally different from your drawn identical twin. And yeah I could have been a bit more subtle, don't you worry, I have a special knack for SPAMMING COMMENTS INTO THE ABYSS! I mean sheesh you where pretty open about it earlier, and you said you did not give a damn about what random people thought... Moral: But yeah, I can do better than that, I just do not want to, no seriously, if you are going to go feeling ashamed, then I have failed you.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Due to a lack of awareness of its surrounding, it died attempting to cross the road.

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Your mom is so stupid that her parents were probably ashamed of her low grades.

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Why do the man leave his tv on? He was murdered while he was watching tv

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What is the difference between a Mexican and a bench? One is a person and one is an inanimate object

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A duck walks into a bar, the bartender says what do you want? the duck says nothing cause ducks can't talk

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Yeah, Eliza, its me, its so strange, you are the only one I remember from highschool, I was worried you had forgotten about me, anyway, yeah type as if you where speaking to him, and dont worry, I know I could not keep a secret back then, and I told Nero, so and he promised me he would kindly break my fingers if I told anyone, besides I dont do that anymore trust me.

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How did the black person die? Of old age

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What's the difference between a dead baby and a Ferrari? I don't keep a Ferrari in my garage. (????)?

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I bet I can say the the whole Greek alphabet faster than any other person in the world. The whole Greek alphabet faster than any other person in the world.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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