Why did the man shoot up the movie theater? Because he spent his whole child hood playing Call of Duty Black Ops II, Left 4 Dead 2, and Minesweeper. And video games, are the only thing that would rive someone to shoot up a movie theater.

Getting up, the 2nd hardest thing in the morning.

the WNBA

Why did the black dude die? Because everyone must die at some point.

A Mexican, a Jew, and a Colored guy walk into a bar, the bartender looks up and says: "What can I get you gentlemen today?"

Q:Why did Jimmy eat an apple? A:He was hungry.

How many cops does it take to change a lightbulb? 1

how did the dead baby cross the road? it was stapled to a chicken..

Why did I put the baby into the blender feet first? So I could see its facial expression

How many Mexicans does it take to screw a lightbulb? None, they couldn't cross the border.

Why are there clocks on stoves? Because it is a convenient way to tell the time.

Bob:Know who's really stupid? Rick:Who? Bob:Your mum.

what do you call a fish with no gills? Dead

Pickles

Roses are red Violets are FUCKING VIOLET NOT FUCKING BLUE

Knock knock? Who's there? A Jehovah's Witness. Oh. Knock knock? Who's there? Not me!

Why was the girl crying? DEEZ NUTS!

I may have Alzheimer's, but at least I don't have Alzheimer's.

Why did the woman leave the kitchen? Because she didn't want to be late for work.

Two muffins are in an oven. How does that even work? Muffin pans come with either 6 or 12 muffin holders.

What do Jesus, The Easter Bunny, and Santa Claus all have in common? Their middle names are all Larry.

Q: what white hard and huge and it can kill you if you fall out of a tree? A: a refrigerator

I had a really great joke to tell you!

Whats the worst part of your school burning down? A: The burnt pizza.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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