There is a white man, a black guy, and an Asian in a car. It got into an accident who did it? Asian dude

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What is black, white and red all over? A nun in a blender

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Q. Why is the road black? A. One hundred million dollars!

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I was hungrey then i saw a man puke. Im still very hungrey. Then i threw up. Im not so hungrey

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Why did the clown chase the boy? The boy was sad and needed cheering up

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Me - "Wanna hear something that will make me laugh?" *giggles* friend - "Sure." teehee if anyone gets it.

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Why didn't the Country club waiter enjoy iced tea? He's simply always had a preference for warm beverages. He assumes this goes back to his infant days when his mother would massage his belly with warm porridge.

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How many Mexicans does it take to screw in a light bulb? Just one. Any more than that and they would just be getting in each others way.

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What caused the Berlin Wall to come down? Gravity

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What does it mean if your born on opposite day? you have sids

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What's big and green and if it fell out of a tree it could kill you? A snooker table

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Whats the similarity between a bike and a black person? They are both stolen

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Why didnt Steve Jobs make an iphone 5? He died

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Why couldn't Hellen Keller drive? Because she was blind.

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Nah really, I start giggling like a dork whenever weird porn or whatever shows up on my computer, its just too weird. Fine ill use my glasses then, thanks for the comment by the way, I was really regretful for sending you that pic, but then again I did not have contacts then, nor did I want to photoshop anything.

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What did the snoop dog have for breakfast? Weed

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Walruses are basically saber-toothed seals. That does not affect the fact that they are awesome.

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What do you call a fat cat? Nothing if you are a good person

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A teenage boy is getting ready to take his girlfriend to prom. First he goes to get a tux but there's a long tux line at the shop and it takes forever. Next, he hast to get some flowers so he goes to a florist and there is a huge flower line there. It takes forever but he gets the flowers. Next he heads to get a limo, unfortunately there is a long limo line at the rental office and it takes a long time but he gets the job done. Finally the day of the prom comes and the two are dancing happily and are having a good time. When the song is over she asks him to get her some punch, so he heads over to the punch table and there is no punchline.

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Why did thomas make a big mess on the ground? Beacuse he fell of a cliff

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Once there was a giant Pringle. His family was dead, his wife committed suicide. So one day he was walking to work, when he met a genie! The genie granted him three wishes. The Pringle's first wish was to have lots of money. His second wish was to have his wife back. Before he could complete his wishing, he awoke in a hospital where he was hooked up to life support and was in severe pain. His wife wasn't really dead, but he was out drinking and accidentally walked across a motorway and got hit by a huge lorry.

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How do you get a baby out of a blender? With tortilla chips.

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What is fat and white? A polar bear with a glandular problem.

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How many Jews does it take to bake a turkey using an oven, I don't know but it only takes one Jew to stuff one.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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