What is a man with no arms and no legs on a pile of leaves? A quadriplegic who enjoys the fall.

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While I was walking home from school one day, James Brown jumped out of a bush and punched me in the face. Then, when I got home, there was a walrus sitting on my couch. He then turned to look at me and said, "Penis". I then immediately farted out blades of grass.

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A Christian and a Jew walk into a bar. The bartender says "What'll you two have to drink?" The Christian says "I'll have a beer." and get this, the Jew says................................"I'll have a beer too."

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What do you call a black man on a rope swing? Usually whatever his first name is, but if he goes by a nickname you should use that

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What do you get when you have 10 kids in a church? A lot of rape cases.

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So, this guy walks into the doctor's and says: "Doctor, it hurts when I poke my leg like this." The doctor says: "Yes, you've shattered both your kneecaps. You'll never walk again."

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your mums so fat she has to use a matress as a tampon

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What is th edifference between jerry sandusky and mike citro sandusky rapes children... ...and joe diragi is gay

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? Because he was dead. Why did the second monkey fall out of the tree? Because he was stapled to the first monkey. Why did the third monkey fall out of the tree? Peer Pressure.

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knock knock whos there jew jew who JEW YOU

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(Played Basketball for 15 years) I TOLD YOU I'D QUIT WHEN LeBron Gets A RING

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Why was the guy shot? He was a soldier in World War 2. Lots of people were shot.

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Yo mama so fat she sells shade. Yo mama so fat she needs cheat codes for wii fit. Yo mama so fat she in call of duty when a player kills her they get a 5 person kill streak. Yo mama so fat that she is fat. :)

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A man walks into a bar. What does he say? A: Ow.

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Every 60 seconds in Africa. A minute passes.

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whats worse than dropping your toast butter side down ? being ripped apart from the anus upwards by a large black man

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I don't know which one is emptier my bank account or my love life

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there are three girls one said daddy why is my name rose because a rose fell on her head when yur a baby. daddy why is my name feather because a feather fell on your head when your a baby mumamhama, SHUT UP CINDER BLOCK!

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I just started the seafood diet. It consists primarily of eating fish due to its high nutritional content.

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What color is Michael Jackson? Pale because he's dead.

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you know what sucks more than getting raped by a gorilla? getting raped by two gorillas.

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Tim and Eric

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When's the best time to go to the dentist? When you have an appointment.

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What couldn't the stereotypical pirate get into the movie? Well, considering that the stereotypical pirate existed in the sixteenth to eightteenth centuries and the first motion picture wasn't made until the mid to late nineteenth century, also the technology for time travel does not exist nor has it ever, I would have to derive that he was not let in due to the fact that there was no way for him to ever exist at the same time that a movie would have been playing.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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