Q: What did the farmer say when he couldn't find his tractor? A: Where's my tractor?

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jd and zach loves vigina

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Q: What did the giraffe say to the sunflower? A: I like your shoelaces!

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Two muffins are in an oven, one muffin says "oh my god were going to die!" The other says "Holy shit a talking muffin!"

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kiss me?

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Whats funnier than 1 dead baby? 2 Dead babies

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A black man walks up to a jewish man in a bar. They engage into a nice conversation, seeing how they were friends back in college.

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monkey sponge

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Agricultural production fell significantly.

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What do you call a dog with no wings? A dog

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A little boy started choking on a condom. His father came and was in a great panic. "Please don't leave me. I don't want to lose you!" he cried over and over again. Then his wife came in and said "it's alright darling, there's plenty more in the drawer". "Oh, thank God for that, I thought I lost it there!" dad replied.

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What do you get if you put a black man in the blender and then in the microwave ? ... I don't know, that's why I'm asking.

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A very unskillful basketball team enters a basketball tournament. They had little chance of winning and concluded with a loss.

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What do you call a black kid on a bike ? Dirt bike

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Golf.

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What's more stinky than a fart? More farts.

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Don't you hate it when ads just [CONGRATULATIONS! YOU HAVE JUST WON A MILLION DOLLARS!* Please click this ad, so you can give us your full name, address, phone number, bank account number, pin number and mail your credit card to us, then you will receive your MILLION DOLLARS!* (you may or may not receive one million dollars) Thank you.] pop up anywhere these days?

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A traveler gets a flat tire on an old farm road. He goes to the door of the neasrest farm and knocks. The farmer and his beautiful 21 year old daughter answer the door. Traveler: "I'm sorry, but I have a flat. Is there any place I can stay until I get it repaired?" Farmer: "Why yes. Our church sponsors a homeless shelter and rehab center down the road.I can give you a ride there if you like?"

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The priest, rabbi and Lady Gaga walk into a bar. Lady Gaga performs on stage, while the priest and rabbi listen.

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Whats worse than being arrested for a crime you didn't commit? Teenage pregnancy.

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Knock knock Who's there Bill Bill who? Bill Thompson

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What's the difference between a baby and a tea bag? Tea bags don't scream when I dip them in boiling water

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tim rafter died no one cared

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Don't you just hate it when sentences don't end how you think they TESTACLES

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops