A middle aged woman walks into a bar. Its Friday and there is a breeze in the air. She leaves shortly thereafter.

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Haikus are easy They are simpler than you think Just don't run out of...

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A man walks into a doctor's office and says, "Doctor, help! My hair is falling out! I need something to keep it in!" The doctor says, "sure. Here's some medicine."

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How much does a polar bear weigh? About 1,150 pounds.

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Why did Sally fall off the swing? She had no arms. ----- Knock knock. Who's there? Not Sally.

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Why did Tina's parents stop calling her? Because they died

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Two men walk into a bar. The third seeing the protruding bar goes home to find his entire family dead from anthrax.

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What do you call a black man flying a plane. A pilot.

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Why was the man happy to see his wife dead? He beat her

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what looks about a computer which has two wheels? a bike. i lied about the computer...

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Why did the chicken cross the road?

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Why did the bird plummet to the earth? It was shot.

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What do you get when you cross a dog with a cat? Nothing, it is impossible to mix 2 different animals

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Why did the black man leave the bar? Someone shot his girlfriend.

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What’s black and white and red all over? A zebra in a meat grinder

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so i turned on my radio.. so i could like listen to some tunes but like, it wasnt working and then like my best bud leaf was all like dude, thats a toaster.

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No. Yes.

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Why did the seal get confused when a spider tried to high five him? Because spiders have eight legs.

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Roses are red Violets are blue I am a gardener

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what is my catphrase nothing I am too good to have one

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Q:What's black and white and red all over? A: An interracial couple in a car crash.

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Why did the blackjack player gamble every night and day and not eat, sleep, or use the bathroom? To practice for a tournament in which the grand prize was to save his dying grandmother.

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Ian: Your Mama's so dumb, she tried to commit suicide off a sidewalk. Dan: Yea, and when that didn't work she hanged herself.

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Who taught Chuck Norris? -Chuck Norris

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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