Q: How did the dead baby get to the other side of the road? A: I threw it over there.

thumb_up thumb_down +13

What should you do if a stranger picks you up? Politely request that he put you down.

thumb_up thumb_down -2

Why did little Timmy start crying? Because he was shot.

thumb_up thumb_down +24

Why did the little boy fall off the swing? Because he had no arms. Why did no one help him up? Because nobody liked him.

thumb_up thumb_down -3

What's worse than finding half a worm in your apple? Being raped

thumb_up thumb_down +655

What's the worst part about anti jokes? They get boring after a while

thumb_up thumb_down -26

Why did the chicken cross the road? He didn't. He flapped his wings, hovered, and the road crossed beneath him.

thumb_up thumb_down +11

A Muslim walks into a bar, and has a pint of lager because he has chosen to integrate into his host country's culture. He then leaves without incident.

thumb_up thumb_down +12

Why did the chicken cross the road? Um...thats impossible because chickens live on farms theyre are no roads....

thumb_up thumb_down +18

What did rosa parks get for christmas? -Racism

thumb_up thumb_down +16

Why did the boy eat the hedgehog? Because it made his mouth bleed,

thumb_up thumb_down -20

Why don't pineapples grow on pine trees? Because they're tropical.

thumb_up thumb_down -13

Knock knock. Who's there? Potatoes. Potatoes who? Garlic salt.

thumb_up thumb_down +8

A group of 3 black male friends sit down to have lunch at the basketball court. One black man reaches in his pack and pulls out a watermelon. The second black man reaches in his basket and pulls out some fried chicken and a pan of cornbread. They both look expectantly towards their friend as he opens up his pack. Right as he opens it, however, his cell phone goes off. Upon completing the call, he hangs up and looks at his two friends. "My financial aid got approved, guys!" he exclaims. Both of his friends congratulate him on finally making it to college. They are so proud.

thumb_up thumb_down +2,391

Justin Beiber

thumb_up thumb_down -3

roses are red orchids are black I like you best when you lye on your back

thumb_up thumb_down -9

A black man walks into a store and grabs something off of a shelf. He walk briskly towards the door and pauses, looking sneakily left and right to make sure nobody else is around. He also looks and sees that the security camera is not facing him. Seeing as nobody is watching him, he quickly turns towards the counter beside the door and pays for the item with his own debit card, knowing that nobody can see him enter his PIN.

thumb_up thumb_down +7

josh moran where your Bluetooth gone?

thumb_up thumb_down -34

A man walks into a resteraunt and joins his friends. Then he realized he had no friends. ~YN~

thumb_up thumb_down -37

Your Mom... is a very nice lady who makes good cookies

thumb_up thumb_down +23

A man walks into a bar, and immediately sees a person with a big orange head seated near the back. He asked the bartender "why does that man have a big orange head?" "Buy him a drink and maybe he'll tell you." So the man bought him a drink and asked the guy with the big orange head why he has a big orange head, and he told him this story: "I was traveling in the sahara desert 10 years ago when I found a pure gold lamp in the sand. I rubbed the sand off so I could read what was on the side when a genie popped out and gave me 3 wishes. First I wished for many riches, and at once gold was all around my feet. Exited, I wished for the most beautiful wife in the world, and right in front of me appeared the most beautiful woman I had ever seen. Third, I wished for a big orange head.

thumb_up thumb_down -1

Q: what do you call a mushy green circle that tastes good? A: An avocado

thumb_up thumb_down +1

Why did the chicken cross the road? It didn't. It was taken to a factory where it was butchered, processed and eventually fed to America.

thumb_up thumb_down +12

An animal entered my house tonight ! It could only be one thing : A bear or a dog.

thumb_up thumb_down -14

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops