What did one dolphin say to the other? Nothing. It was dead.

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A married couple is arguing over the temperature in their house. The wife wants it at 62 degrees and the husband wants it at 74. What should they do? Nothing while they are arguing their daughter decides to put it at 32 and freeze them to death

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Q: Why are the Black Eyed Peas named the Black Eyed Peas? A: I don't know ask them yourself.

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Why did the eskimo drag the seal into the igloo? Because the whale wouldn't fit.

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What did the woman say when she ate crabs. This smells like my vagina (This women died slowly from crabs)

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What did the cat say to the cat? Miau

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Why don't blind people own cats? They do, who told you that?

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What is a ghost's favorite dessert? Nothing. Ghosts do not exist, thus they cannot eat dessert.

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How do you get a little kid out of a tree Throw a jar of foreskin at him

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in 2001 a man was working happily in his office cubicle and got an email from his boss saying that he had great news for him. filled with excitment he knew he was getting A big promotion and could finally afford that new toy his kid has always wanted. Feeling great the man walks up to the office window to enjoy the view he notices a very large commercial airliner flying straight towards his office.

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Why did the Mexican cross the border? He wanted to live a better life in pursuit of freedom and a better job.

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What is the best thing about dating a slut? You can return her at Build-a-Hoe Workshop.

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RATE THIS JOKE THUMBS UP FOR TEN COOKIES COOKIES COOKIES COOKIES COOKIES RATE THIS JOKE THUMBS UP FOR TEN COOKIES COOKIES COOKIES COOKIES COOKIES

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A black man walks into a bar. The barman says 'We don't serve your kind here'. The man leaves and goes to a nearby bar that doesn't have racist staff.

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you are as stupid as alec. lol neewb

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whats fat and ugly ? aidan slattery

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Why was Susan tied up on the railroad tracks? Because she was a blonde and her dad told her it was a roller coaster.

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A young blind boy is being tucked into bed by his mother. The mom says "Now Billy, pray really hard tonight and tomorrow, your wish will come true!". Billy says, "Ok mommy." and goes to sleep. The next morning, Billy wakes up and screams "MOMMY! I'm still blind, my wish didn't come true!", the mom answered, "I know - April Fools!"

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whats forever alone me

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Q. What do you call a bashed black man laying on pavement? A. Neapolitan

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What would have happend if martin Luther king was white? I don't know he wasn't so it's irrelevant

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what are the best kind of bees none they sting and hurt like hell

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I like to use vasoline during sex. I put it on the doorknob so she can't escape.

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whats the difference between a chicken and a rooster. a rooster has a dick

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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