How do you wake up lady Gaga? You poke her face

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Q: What did the Lone Ranger say when he saw his horse coming? A: Here comes my horse.

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If you can cut half a rope. You can cut the whole rope.

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what happened to the baseball player who couldnt throw? he was very unsuccessful, as throwing is the most important skill of the game

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? I hate niiggers ?

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Q: Why did they bury the Indian? A: Because he was dead.

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What is the difference between an obese white man, and a physically fit black man? Their weight and skin color.

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Why did the chiken cross the road? It didn't, J-walking is against the law.

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hi iggy

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What do you call someone like Sarah Palin? A tragic victim of America's flawed educational system. But hey! She learned one thing though! Russia is right in her own backyard! Oh wait that would be wrong unless her backyard stretched all the way across Alaska and the Bering Sea. So she didn't learn anything at all. OK she's just dumb

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No, Sarah. You know your hooks scratch the keys.

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A man walks into a bar. It was a metal bar. He got hurt.

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MAKE

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Knock Knock ............... No one's home.

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What did the man say when he found out he had cancer? Nothing. He was so in shock, that he later died from another type of cancer.

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So a seal walks into a club.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? It didn't. The chicken was ran over before it made it to the other side.

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What did the boy say to his father? I don't know. With the seemingly infinite number of topics that two people could discuss and the fact that both the father and son are fictional, it would be unreasonable and border edge mentally unstable for me to assume that you would know what they may or may not be talking about.

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What do you call a young child being beating to death with a spiked club? Arousing.

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Whats easier to fit in a trunk, babies or concrete bricks? Babies because you can hit them with a pitchfork.

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ask me if im a door yes

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Knock Knock Who's there? Jehovah's witness Damn...

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How do I recover from my Pokémon addiction? Catch 'em All!

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What's worse than bad words? People who say them

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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