Whats red and you can't see it? No Tomatoes

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why did Jen fall off the swing? because she had no arms. knock knock who's there not Jen

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i just cant stand up to cripple jokes

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Roses are red Violets are blue I hate rhyming Penis

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What's green and has wheels? A snow flake. I lied about the wheels, and the color.

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Why was the pig sweating? It wasnt, because pigs have adapted by using behavioral thermoregulation, which is the act of cooling themselves in the mud or water.

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Humans are pathetic: What kind of heaven is it when you die, and learn that everybody you love chose the wrong religion and is burning in hell? Moral: Human garbage!

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Why did little Sally fall off the swing? Because she had no arms. Knock Knock. Who's there? Not Sally.

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What's worse than being fired? Eating a bucket of diarrhea.

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What is white, red, and all in your girlfriend? red and white blood cells

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because it felt like it!!!

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? Because it was dead! Why did the bird fall out of the tree? It was attatched to the monkey! Why did the squirrel fall out of the tree? .....................peer pressure

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What is the difference between a firework and a dog? One is funny to blow up and the other one is pretty lights

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Two Pigs are in a bath. One pig says to the other "pass me the soap", to which the other pig replies "Do I look like a typewriter?"

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what did the man living in the box buy with his new found money? A bigger box.

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why was smokey bear sad? he got cancer from smokeing

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Why did the boy cry when he got a new puppy? Because he had anal seepage coming out his ass

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Why was the snowman afraid of the sun? Because he would melt that day and die

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there was a guy who wanted to be bad and have bitches but he died from all the smoking and drinking and went to hell for eternal damnation

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What did the homeless man get for Christmas? Frostbite.

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today in aa we were telling stories one of them was: that a girl put a wet cat (to dry it) in the oven

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Why did John not like his chocolate? It wasn't chocolate it was poop.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? On a fundamental level, it was pursuing evolutionary instincts, perhaps a half-bored interest in food.

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If Justin Bieber and Rebecca Black had a baby, would it be a boy or a girl? It's a fifty-fifty shot.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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