how many mice does it take to screw in a lightbulb just 2 but it beats me how they got in there

thumb_up thumb_down -10

Red sky in the morning, Shepard's warning. Red sky at night, Shepard's Fulcrum.

thumb_up thumb_down +6

What's as hard as a rock? A rock

thumb_up thumb_down +10

A girl and a boy where sitting on a couch together. The boy told the girl politly that she hass gained a significant amount of weight and should lose it. She then pulled out a candy bar in her back pocket and shoved it down his throat, to which he suffocated, because she was on her period when to comment was made.

thumb_up thumb_down -5

what did the little girl with no arms or legs get for her birthday? a bike.

thumb_up thumb_down +7

Why are black people so stupid an lazy? They aren't. This is a negative social stigma and if you believe it you are a racist.

thumb_up thumb_down -75

Q: How do you call a group of animals? A: Llama.

thumb_up thumb_down -17

There was a man on a park bench and he saw a duck fly by so he decided to go and see what it was up to. He saw that it was just going for a swim in a near by pond. He died 2 years ago of auto erotic asphyxiation because of a common fetish.

thumb_up thumb_down -5

What's the difference between a Mexican and a bench? A bench is an inanimate object and a Mexican is a human being.

thumb_up thumb_down +3

Jeff: Did you know, someone called you an owl? Billy: Who?

thumb_up thumb_down -10

The blonde, brunette and,the red headed girls were at a store. When the blonde says......... im tired let's leave.

thumb_up thumb_down -7

what is meaningless and not fun at all? that joke

thumb_up thumb_down +8

What is the opposite of Obama? Mitt Romney because he his white and a republican so all is good with him.

thumb_up thumb_down +1

Why is my son so unhappy? Because I beat his mother violently in front of him

thumb_up thumb_down -38

what has four legs but cant move? dead dog

thumb_up thumb_down -14

What does mens "man sauce" and babies have in common? They're both fun to make and easy to kill...

thumb_up thumb_down +40

Q. What do you call a person with no arms, legs, torso, or head? A. A mutilated corpse.

thumb_up thumb_down -18

You are short with no perm, you will never be Kat Willams.

thumb_up thumb_down +10

don't make holocaust jokes, my grandfather died in the holocaust, he fell out of the birds nest shooting Jews.

thumb_up thumb_down +32

The Game.

thumb_up thumb_down -5

Q: What did Batman say to Robin when he noticed he had lost his belt? A: Robin! Q:What did Robin respond? A: Yes?

thumb_up thumb_down +25

Why was the turtle blue? He wasn't you are color blind.

thumb_up thumb_down -18

What did the little boy get from his parents on Christmas? Nothing. His parents died 2 nights before in a tragic car crash.

thumb_up thumb_down -15

Joe: CHOP CHOP KICK PUNCH HI-YAH! Mike:What are you doing? JOE: PRACTICING CHPO MENTAL KICK KARATE!!!!!!!

thumb_up thumb_down -3

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops