what is big and green and would kill you if it fell out of a tree? A snooker table

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How do you get a black guy out of a tree? Kindly ask him to come down.

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What's the difference between a Mexican and a pizza? A pizza can feed a family of four.

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I hate Mondays, the man said as he drove to work. Fortunately for him, it was a Wednesday.

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Pete and Repeat were on a boat. Pete fell off. Who was left? Repeat. Yeah.

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What starts with P and ends in ORN Popcorn!

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An astronaut walks into a bar. He orders a beer. After waiting for about 1 and a half minutes he receives his beer. The bartender says it was 3 dollars. The astronaut checks his wallet and finds no money so he pays with credit card. The bartender swipes his credit card but the card doesn't work. So the astronaut takes out his debit card. When the bartender swipes the debit card it worked. In relief the astronaut looks at the bartender and says "Thank you" and then goes home.

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Why can't Abraham Lincoln tell a lie? Because he's dead.

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A man walks into a bar after a hard day of work, and he meets this girl and they really kick it off, so the girl says, "lets go somewhere more, private" and they both go to a more secluded bar that has less decibels of noise.

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What do you call the worst band ever? Nickelback.

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How many dead babies does it take to paint a car? It depends on how fast you drive.

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yo mama soooooooooooo fat that she should be concerned of the incressed risk of dibties

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Wuts brown and smelly? Brown smelly stuff.

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How many Jews can you fit in the car? 4 in the seats and 6 million in the ashtray.

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don't repeat this joke!don't repeat this joke!don't repeat this joke!don't repeat this joke!don't repeat this joke!

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How many republicans does it take to change a lightbulb? CHANGE?????

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a man walks into a bar... he was then shot to death because he was a slave in the early 1800s

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My captcha thing says "hulk smash" lol bahahahahahahaha, k

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A man walks into a bar. and buys a drink.

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A priest, rabbi, and mormon are arguing about which religion is best. A zookeeper hears and says, "I have a bear who is sleeping right now. How about whoever converts the bear belongs to the best religion?" The priest goes in first, and then walks out a few minutes later, unharmed. The mormon does the same, and he too exits unscathed. The rabbi goes in, and walks out covered in claw marks. "How'd it go?" Said the zookeeper. "Easy." Said the priest. "I just sprinkled some Holy water on him." "I did the same." Said the mormon. The rabbi looked at the zookeeper and said, "have you ever tried to circumcise a bear?"

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How do you confuse a blonde? You tell em a AntiJoke!

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Argon walks into a bar. The bartender yells, "Get the hell out!" Argon doesn't react.

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Why couldn't the dog say anything to the cat? It was born deaf.

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why did billy fall on the sidewalk? he got stabbed

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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