Why couldn't the pirate go to the movies? He had scheduling conflicts

whats the difference between a white kid a nd a puerto rican kid? one smells fine and the other one smells like he walked out of a butcher shop that sells cigars and cheap prostitutes

Wanna hear a joke? Once upon a time, there was a successful Mexican.

whats better than holocaust...911 cardiac?

a dragon walks into a bar. the bartender says "stop it". the dragon eats the bartender.

Q: Why did the chicken cross the road? A: He was wandering because he was lost and got hit by a car in the process.

why wasnt the baby cute? -because it was dead

A woman walks out of the kitchen.

What looks like midnight and is addicted to shemale porn? Xavier Jordan! Courtesy of Mrs. Maxwells 7th period

knock knock who's there no one

A man comes home after a long days work. It is late at night and he gets in bed with his wife who is already asleep. Later that night he gets up for a glass of water and returns to the bed room to see that his wife doesn't appear to be breathing and calls 911. He then realizes that this isn't his house and he leaves.

What's black and white and red all over? I don't know I asked you

What's black and can't speak? A garbage can.

A African man and Hispanic man fall off of a cliff, which hits the ground first? They both hit the ground simultaneously, due to their equal mass and surface area.

A man penetrates another man.

Is that a threat or a promise? dragonflies

I went seal clubbing the other day but as I was the only one with legs, the dancefloor was quite lonely

Maturity is a virtue.

Knock knock. *after waiting 30 seconds or so to no answer, the knocker concludes there is no one home and decides to go home to take his son to soccer practice and work on his taxes, and maybe call his mother to see how her foot surgery went* Who's there? Oh.. This is awkward, I forgot why I was here in the first place. I have to go. Bye.

It was the eve of December and a man was using a blanket why? because it was cold and he wanted to be able to function properly at work so his boss would not get mad at him because he respected his boss and wanted to make him happy

You know what makes me smile? Facial muscles.

Whats worse than a truck full of dead babies? A live baby trying to eat his way out.

woman's rights

How do you get four gay guys on a bar stool? With teamwork and coordination, each could place one foot on the seat, and they can all stand up using each other for balance and support. The fact that they are gay in unimportant.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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