A zen master walks up to a hot dog vendor and says, "Make me one with everything." The vendor says, "Sorry, we're out of relish." Then the zen master tells him, "Sir, I don't think you get the joke. As you can see by my long silk robes and fu manchu, I am clearly a zen master. And I have used a pun that would make you think I were asking for enlightenment from a hot dog." The vendor then says, "We don't take too kindly to wise guys here." And then the prick gets up and tosses me into the street!

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Whats worse than spilling ketchup on your shirt? Getting hit by a bus

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Why did the man cross the road? His mother had recently passed away after a 12 year battle with lung cancer and is visiting her tombstone.

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(joker) Do you like fishsticks? (recipient) "No" (any response from the joker at this point qualifies as anti joke)

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A white man/women works behing the counter at a 7/11

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A joke

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What do you call a pig that knows karate? A pig, because even if a pig could learn karate its still a pig.

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why did the man steal change from the tip jar? he wanted another state quarter for his collection

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Is your refrigerator running? No.

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Twinkle Twinkle little wh**e close youre legs youre not a door. youre gonna get an S,T,D, youree only wanted cause youre free... Twinkle Twinkle little Wh**e youre cheeper then the dollar store

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I went out back to bury my hoe.. with a hoe..

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Whais red and bad for your teeth? a brick

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What do you call a person driving a plane? Not a pilot, they fly planes.

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What's worse than a duck with one leg? A nuclear explosion

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What happened when the mailman shot the plumber? The plumber died.

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A priest, a rabbi, and a whale sit down at a bar. The priest says to the bartender, "Jesus Christ is our savior." The rabbi responds, "No. Our savior has not yet been born." To which the whale adds, "MMMUUURRRAAAAAAOOOUUU!!!"

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TRENT EGENLAUF IS a LITTLE BOY

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There once was a man from Nantucket, His dick was so long it caused tremendous physical discomfort, and it was extremely difficult for him to find pants that did not reveal his freakish abnormality, and greatly limited his levels of intimacy. After botched reduction surgery, he was left without a penis at all and, realising the horrible irony, threw himself into a raging river (experiencing no shrinkage whatsoever).

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a kid says, "where are you from?" other kid says "my mom"

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Why couldn't the young girl play outside with her friends? She was bed ridden with terminal cancer.

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A dyslexic man walked into a bra.

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Why is a blonde girl crying in the bathroom? Because she has been bullied and someone broke her nose.

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What's worse than homework? A basket full of mutilated puppies....

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whos a sick fuck? jake morris

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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