What time is it? It depends in your location and time zone

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why did the ginger start crying. because people through bricks at him!

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What happens when you give a guinea pig a cherry? He turns into satan.

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i think i have a problem with these jokes they aren't finny

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why do muslims always turn to their left? Because they don't have their rights.

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Darude - Sandstorm

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Q: What happened to the teenage girl and the serial rapist at Denny's around midnight? A: They both ordered the french toast Grand Slam breakfast (at Denny's, its breakfast any time!!).

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red is red blue is blue derpy derp de derp

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Why did the black man die? He drove off a cliff.

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What's twelve inches long and makes women scream? Crib death.

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Knock Knock Who's There? A rapist

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What did the man say to the other man? I have a large rod

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What's the difference between a Jew and a pizza? A jew is a person of the jewish faith and a pizza is delicious food.

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A burglar broke into a house one night. He picked up a CD player to place in his sack and a strange, disembodied voice echoed from the dark, saying, "Jesus is watching you." He nearly jumped out of his skin, clicked his flashlight off, and froze. When he heard nothing more, he shook his head, clicked the light on, and began searching for more valuables. Just as he pulled the stereo out so he could disconnect the wires, he heard, "Jesus is watching you." Freaked out, he shined his light around frantically, looking for the source of the voice. Finally, in the corner of the room, his flashlight beam came to rest on a parrot. "Did you say that?" he hissed at the parrot "Yep," the parrot confessed, then squawked, "I'm just trying to warn you." The burglar relaxed. "Warn me, huh? Who in the world are you?" "Moses," replied the bird. "Moses?" the burglar laughed. "What kind of people would name a bird Moses?" "Devout Semites," the parrot replied.

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Q.What is black and white and red (read) all over? A. A penguin in a blender.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because it had Alzheimers and forgot that he lived on the other side of the street.

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what did the girl trapped in the fire say? help

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what's worse than finding 8 dead babies in 1 trash can?....... 1 dead baby in 8 trash cans.

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How do you make a plumber cry? Kill his family.

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yo mommas so fat she heard it was chilly out so she ran inside and got a bowl

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Two Japanese men walked out of a bar. They drowned.

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women sitting on a bench quietly. they have no ability to speak.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Why are you worrying about the chicken? You just got shot.

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A woman gets on a bus with her baby. The bus driver says: ''Ugh, that's the ugliest baby I've ever seen!'' The woman gets off the bus and files a complaint with the public transit system and the driver loses his job.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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