HI MY NAME IS DOUG

Hey wanna hear joke? ........ yeah .......me too

My mother's star sign was Cancer. Ironic how she died really. She was attacked by a giant crab.

Did you hear the one about the avalanche that crashed into the bar? It was such a tragedy.

Roses are Red Toilets are Blue Get out of Me way I Need to POO!

Why did Little Suzie fall off her bike? I hit her with a shovel. Why did little Suzie die? I hit her with a shovel and she fell off her bike.

What did the racist white guy say to the black guy? "I don't like Asians."

Why did the black man go through the window of the house? He left his keys inside

A mormon walks into a bar. The Bartender says "What can I get you" The Mormon says "Sparkling Water please. In my religion we don't drink alcohol."

Other Guy: What are you looking at? Me: You.

A black man walks into a store and buys a gun based upon the increasing crime rate in his area. He stops for lunch and heads home.

Mario goes home after a hard day of work and finds his entire family killed and a note from Bowser... He is now an asshole who beats and rapes kids...

What do you tell a woman with two black eyes? Nothing 'cause you done told the b i t c h twice!

a. johns friend said your a towel b. rick replied im obivously not a towel and walked away in discust at his friends stupidity.

Why did Sally fall off the swing? She had no arms.

Why did the man spill his coffee on his daughter? Because he is dying from Mad Cow disease so his hand experienced a traumatic spasm.

How many Facebook friends does George Bush have? None because he doesn't have a Facebook.

Knock, Knock? Who's there? Boo. Boo who? Why are you crying? I'm not crying. Oh.

Your mom is such a slut, she had unprotected sex at least once.

Why did Nico Bellec not shoot that one guy? Just joking, this is Grand Theft Auto 4 dummy.

There were two elephants in a bathtub. One elephant says, "Hey, could you pass the soap." The other replies, "No soap, radio."

So this guy's taking a hooker back to a hotel room, right? The woman turns out to be a federal agent investigating prostitution in inner-city inviornments, and the man is promptly arrested. He is now subject to a large fine and 90 days in a county jail.

tell ur mom i love her before i die this would have been a better ending to the tintanic

What's faster, a train or a bike? A horse because a cow gives milk

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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