What did the priest do to the young catholic boy? Bless him.

its's not rape if you yell "suprise!"

A woman becomes pregnant. 9 months later she has a baby.

What do you call a room full of lawyers? A group of legally educated professionals.

So I was walking along the beach one day and I see this whale. Then this dolphin named Lennie came up and was like, "Hey whale, how've you been? I haven't seen you in a while." And the whale was like, "Sorry, but I can't talk to you." And Lennie was like, "Whyever not?" And the whale said, "Because I'm not a starfish!"

Part 1 - Why did Suzy fall off the swing? Because she had no arms! Part 2 - Knock knock Who's there? Not Suzy!

What is the difference between a black person and a pizza? Nothing, they both taste like chicken

whats worse then finding a worm in your apple? finding two worms in your apple

knock knock whose there? i don't know...

That's what she didn't say

What do you call a white guy in a mostly black neighborhood? His name.

Ran into my ex last night, so I put my truck in reverse and did it again.

Why was the little boy afraid of the dentist because he was a pedophile

What do Whitney Houston and MTV have in common? They both REALLY died in the 90's.

A Blonde Goes On "Who Wants To Be A Millionaire"

Why did the baby duck cry? Because his family just got ran over by a truck

There is this dylectic who can't spell.

What do you call a black person flying an airplane? a pilot you racist

What do you get if you cross a man and a horse? Severe internal bleeding.

How come Helen Keller didn’t scream when she fell off the cliff? Because at 19 months she contracted an illness that left her blind and deaf and therefore never learned to properly use her vocal cords

A man died and went to heaven. Luckily, he was resuscitated by a trained medical professional, and after a stern warning from his doctor, he lost weight, limited the cholesterol in his diet, and went on to live a very happy and healthy life.

What did the rap singer say to the other rap singer? "You just got served. Here, read this subpoena and sign it, verifying your understanding of the document."

A Jewish man and a blonde were in a DIY store, the man buys a box of screws. The woman gets a phone call to find out her son is late for tennis training. She then hangs up the phone and leaves the DIY store with great hast.

Girl: Do you like me :D Boy: No Girl: =( Boy: You didn'y ask me if i loved you Girl: :D Do you love me Boy: Naw

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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