The air is green The grass is blue I'm bot stoned.. I'm just high

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You're welcome!

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A man claims to own a talking dog. A skeptic approaches the man and his dog and asks for a demonstration. The man asks his dog, "How does sandpaper feel?" The dog says, "Ruff!" The skeptic is not convinced. The man then asks his dog, "Who is the greatest baseball player of all time?" The dog, who like all dogs cannot fully comprehend human speech, proceeds to lick his balls.

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What's the worse part about a Jewish man dying in a house fire? It was his birthday

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A man, a woman, and their son were happily going out for a nice family dinner. The family they ate wasn't so happy.

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Whats funnier than watching the kid next to you on the computer? Nothing because he is still trying to figure out that i unplugged his mouse!

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What's worse than sibling rivalry? having no bones

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a blonde and a brunette sit down to take an IQ test. They both scored above average and were very proud.

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Why did the color blind man cut the red wire and accidentally blew himself up and all the other people involved in the situation? Because he didn't know how to defuse a bomb.

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Chuck Norris died.

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Why is 6 afraid of 7? Because in between 6 and 7 there used to be the number § but 7 raped and murdered it.

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What does the name Joe mean? Joe Mama! Egit

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Why does the cow have spots? Because it was born that way

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Why did the plane crash? Why? Because the pilot was a loaf of bread.

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I dont have a girlfriend

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Your momma so stupid that it's really inspiring she managed to overcome her limitations and raise such a wonderful family.

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Why don't you play cards with a cheetah? It will attack you.

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A plane carrying an Englishman, an Irishman, and a Scotsman is destined to crash unless some weight is lost. First they drop the spare engine, but there is still too much weight. Then they drop the luggage, but still there is too much weight. All three men then jump out. The plane crashes anyway.

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Roses are reddish Violets are bluish If it wasn't for Christmas We'd all be Jewish

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You wanna know what's totally out of this world? The moon

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Roses are red Violets are blue I'm schizophrenic And so am I

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Roses are red Violets are blue I gotta go to the bathroom

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What happens when a gay guy and a hillbilly enter at the same bar togather? a police dog nation gards and a priest had to stop the abomination.

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What's orange and sounds like a parrot? A carrot.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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