How are Justin Bieber and Lady Gaga similar? They are both men except Justin Beiber

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In soviet Russia - some people were poor.

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25.

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How do you make a priest cry? ... You kill his family

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I was reading a book about antigravity, but I put it down because it was boring.

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What do andy and Justin Bieber have in common? they are both 5'7

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Why was the blonde fired from the M &M's factory? Her Masters degree in electrical engineering made her overqualified for the job she had.

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A man walks into a bar, has a few drinks and spots a nice looking lady He then follows her home and molestes her child.

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Q: How do you stop a hijacked plane? A: The plane can't be hijacked because the pilots cabin is not accessable until the plane lands.

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Why cant Helen Keller drive a bus? Cuz she's dead!

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No I do not think that, that would be a wasted thought.

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What's black, white, and red all over? Road Kill Penguins.

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Your mom is so fat that she has diabetes

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A white guy, spanish guy, and a black guy jump off a roof. They were all killed on impact and their families will mourn their loss for years to come.

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Guys, I think I'm gonna apply to join the Crips. My SAT score is a 2050, and their average score is a 2200. My GPA, however, is a 4.6, and their average is only a 4.2. Do you guys think that they will take me? Or should I try and apply for the Bloods?

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An ordinary man, much like your friend Brad from that one place where you used to hang out, was walking along one night, much like that night last week, and saw a star. He then wished upon that star...and kept walking.

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Quaint? Oh yeah? YOU ARE QUAINT! No seriously, whats that word all about.

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Q:Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? A:Because it wa dead!!!!!!

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What's sad about a guy jumping off a cliff? The cliff.

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A man is walking alone in a park and stumbles upon a lamp. He rubs the lamp and a genie appears out of thin air. The genie tells him he has three wishes to wish for whatever his heart desires. The man naturally wishes for Anthony Davis to shave his damn unibrow. He then throws the lamp at a little boys face and laughs uncontrollably.

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What did the lawyer say to the other lawyer? Were both lawyers.

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what do you get if you cross a motorway with a wheel barrow? Arrested as a wheelbarrow is not a motorised vehicle, or even a vehicle at all and therefore it is an offence to cross the motorway with it, actually it is probably an offence to cross a motorway with anything now that I come to think of it

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Women's rights

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What did Christopher Columbus say to his men before they got on the ship? "Men, get on the ship."

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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