Knock knock. Who's there? Dave. Dave who? Dave was beginning to get very scared of his best friend at this time, so he ran away panicking.

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How many Jews can you fit in a car? It really depends on the make and model of the car, as well as the relative size and weight of the people in question, but legally you can only have as many people in the car as there are seatbelts available for them.

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What do you call a black guy with a peg leg? An amputee.

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What did the bird say to the fence? Chirp.

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Why did Sally have a headache? She had a Brian tumor the size of an eggplant.

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Knock, Knock Who's there? Anti-Joke Delivery Service. Oh, just leave it by the door.

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What did a lot of money say? I FEEL LIKE A MILLION BUCKS!!!!!

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Why did the girl throw butter out the window? She was suffering from an epileptic seizure.

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Why couldn't the blonde drive? Because she was 14, thus incapable of having a drivers license

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What do you call a Muslim running a country? Obama

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whats worse than a pile of dead babies? two piles of dead babies.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? For a legitimate reason

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Knock knock SCREW YOU I BUSY!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

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Roses are red. Violets are blue. I have short-term memory loss. And roses are red.

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2 Men Walk Into A Bar, I Forget The Rest.

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Your mother is so fat that she is highly likely to get heart disease and/or diabetes.

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How many mice does it take to screw in a light bulb? None. Mice don't have the strength required to do that.

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Your mama is so....well we've been friends since childhood and I know your mother passed away recently. So, as to refrain from being an insensitive jerk to a good friend. I will tell this joke to someone with a mother who is fat, dumb, lazy, ugly, or has a combination of these traits. Or has none of these and happens to be a nice lady with a son/daughter who just enjoys a good mama joke.

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why did the boy drop his icecream? Because he got hit by a boat

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I remember my first beer. It did not taste good to me at the time.

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what happened when Bob told a joke? Joe laughed.

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roses are red violets are red everything's red i'm colour blind

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What's the best sound in the world? Children screaming

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Did you hear about the mail man without a mail truck? He walked

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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