What do you get when you mix 5 bottles of beer, a bottle of vodka, 3 glasses of red wine, and 15 jello shots? Alcohol poisoning.

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What's the difference between a lawyer and a catfish? one's a scum-sucking bottom feeder, the other is a lawyer

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What's brown and sticky? A stick

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why did the roof cave in? It was not structurally sound do to poor architecture

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How do you stop a bus from hitting you?? You throw small children to impede the progress of the bus.

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Why did the helicopter crash? Because the driver was fat.

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there once was a little boy who lived in a little house with his little parents who ate little food. one day the boy went on a website called antijokes and he started to read a joke, by the time he had gotten to the end of the joke he realized that there was no punchline but it was very lenghty and quite pointless.

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What do you call a boomerang that doesn't come back? -a black man that left his family

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why was osama bin laden shot and killed? because he was a very violent man and deserved his punishment

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A girl walked into a bar and sat next to a man. She asked what he was drinking. He said something that makes you fly. She didn't believe him. He then went up to the roof, jumped off and walked back in the front door. She got the drink then tried to jump off the roof, and died on impact. The bartender said to the man "You're a real asshole when you're drunk superman."

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Why did the chicken die? Because it was crossing a busy road.

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Knock knock. Who's there? The bailiffs, we have come to take your house

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do you know what Noah didn't bring on his arc? unicorns

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Whats worse then getting stabbed in the trachea by a aids infected knife? getting pounded anally by satan

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Do you know what Chuck Norris does for a living? He's an actor, I also heard he's quite good with martial arts.

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What does aaron eat for dinner Answer- Fat Finger HAHAHAHAHA

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what's blue , and you can urinate it? a rim block.

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Q: why did everyone on the ship drown? A: Because the ship sunk

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Boys have swag, real men have class

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What rhymes with ten? Rape..... What rhymes with boat? Float.....

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What did the hobo get for Christmas? Nothing

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Q- Why? A- Why not?

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Why can't Bin laden drive because he's dead

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A duck quacks in a mountain range. No one on or nearby the mountains hears the duck because ducks' quacks don't echo.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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