There is a boy in a school............. SUDDENTLY, PEDOBEAR APPEARS!

thumb_up thumb_down -4

There are four worms walking in a straight line. The first worm says, "Hey, there's a worm walking behind me!" The second worm says, "Hey, there's a worm walking behind me, too!" The third worm says, "Hey, there's a worm walking behind me, too!" The fourth worm says, "Hey, there's a worm walking behind me, too!" How can this be? ...the fourth worm lied!

thumb_up thumb_down +15

what did the man say to the sad woman? go make ma a sammich before i hit you again! the women refused and was hit again.

thumb_up thumb_down -18

Women deserve equal rights... April fools.

thumb_up thumb_down

Why don't pineapples grow on pine trees? Because they're tropical.

thumb_up thumb_down -13

What did the doctor say to the lawyer? Nothing. They weren't even together. He was in the hospital saving people and the lawyer was in his office working on a case.

thumb_up thumb_down -2

Person 1: So now that were friends on facebook, you wanna hang out? Person 2: No I'd rather not.

thumb_up thumb_down +7

What is a boomerang that doesn't come back? A stick.

thumb_up thumb_down +17

Why did Paul Walker cross the road? He wasn't wearing his seatbelt.

thumb_up thumb_down +7

What's brown and has four wheels? Wood, I lied about the wheels.

thumb_up thumb_down -9

When will Abe Vigoda be alive again? Never. There will never again be a time when Abe Vigoda will be alive. For example, Abe Vigoda will be dead for the entirety of the year 2038. He will continue to be dead if we move forward to the year 2091, and even if we keep jumping forward throughout history, stopping in the years 2250, 2871, and 3546, we will not land in an era when Abe Vigoda will be alive. Another way to look at this is to imagine Abe Vigoda had died in earlier years. Let's say he had died in 1902. Would he be alive today? The answer, sadly, is no. We get the same answer if we suppose Abe Vigoda had died in 1822, 1715, or ~ 85,200,000 BPE. To sum up, it is not precisely accurate to say that Abe Vigoda will be dead for a very long time. That implies a limit on the amount of time he will be dead. There is no limit.

thumb_up thumb_down +13

Why did jack fall down the hill ? Because Jill pushed him.

thumb_up thumb_down +32

Whats the difference between and ? Blue custard

thumb_up thumb_down -16

A man had sex with his secretary. She was his wife.

thumb_up thumb_down -4

What's inside that man's house? Atoms.

thumb_up thumb_down -7

roses are red violets are blue i bribed a hobo to eat my poopoo

thumb_up thumb_down -8

What did Helen Keller name her dog? Well i would imagine one of various names for a domesticated animal and she would choose the name based on her likes towards nature or an element of nature, being the educated individual she i would think she may name it base on a person of importance, such as an author or maybe a writer that inspires her.

thumb_up thumb_down -19

How do you get a one armed Polish man out of a tree? With a ladder, he needs help.

thumb_up thumb_down -1

What did the Black man say when he just got home from work? "Hi honey, I just got home from work."

thumb_up thumb_down +72

Why was Billy no mates? He had no friends.

thumb_up thumb_down +14

The neighbours challenged me to a water fight so I am updating Anti jokes while i let the kettle boil.

thumb_up thumb_down +1

Q: What do you call black guys running down a hill? A: Black guys running down a hill.

thumb_up thumb_down +12

The size of Idris Elba's penis

thumb_up thumb_down +31

why did the girl slap joe? he had a boner.

thumb_up thumb_down +14

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops