Boy:U a dime Girl: she said ur a quarter Boy:-_- dumb B***h

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? Because he was dead. Why did the second monkey fall out of the tree? Because he was stapled to the first monkey. Why did the third monkey fall out of the tree? Peer Pressure.

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Im about to rewrite History....... History

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A man was walking home when a little boy ran up to him. He said "hey mister, how do you sleep apples?" Then the man wasn't sure why he asked him so he spelled it out for him "that's easy my boy, A-P-P-L-E" the little boy said "you said pee pee!" Then he laughed and ran off

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Why did the mouse cross the road, and then go down it? It tried to get cheese on the other side, but got hit by a SUV and was stuck to the wheels. The rat on the wheel goes "Squish, Scratch,, Mush........

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America's Got Talent WIN! Britian's Got Talent WIN! Mexico's Got Talent WTF!

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homework

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Three men sat at a pub, it reminded them of this joke they once heard

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There was a Mexican in a bomb shop ?

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What did Batman say to Robin before he got into the car? "Robin, get in the car."

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What's red and smells like green paint? Red Paint

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When I grow up, I don't want to be a therapist. I have enough trouble figuring out the problems in my math book.

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What did the Japanese man do to the pizza? He ate it.

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Q;what do you call a fish with two knees and personally HANDS out JOBS A: a blowfish

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Im black

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A baby seal walks in to a club

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How do you make a Child cry? Slaughter his dog and feed it to him convincing him its Chili

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what did the chicken say to the vet? nothing chickens dont talk

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What do you call Ed Milliband after he's been decapitated? Dead Milliband.

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hi

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because it saw food on the other side the the farmer was going to chop his head off.

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A police officer asks a witness of a murder what he witnessed. The man replies "A murder"

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One day, I was talking to a lamp on the phone, when I realized I had called the wrong lamp.

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Why did the boy fall off the swing? Because it broke...

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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