Why did the little boy fall asleep? His parent pulled the plug.

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A Weight loss service that works

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What has legs but can't walk? A table...or a dog with four broken legs.

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What do you call an African american in your back yard A slave (I am sorry this is racist)

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Why was he arrested? He broke the law.

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What do you call a blonde at the beach? A dipthong.

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A small child and a pedophile are walking hand-in-hand through the dark, creaky woods. "Mister," says the small child, " I'm scared." "YOU'RE scared?" says the pedophile. "I'M the one who's gonna have to walk back alone!"

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What did the grandson inherit when his grandmother died? Nothing, they both were killed in a tragic car accident.

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A police man pulls over a blonde for speeding. The policeman tells her she was speeding and starts to write a ticket. She get emotional and begins to cry. He writes the ticket, she signs it, and she drives off.

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What's the difference between a Mexican and a pizza? A pizza can feed a family of four.

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i had sex i stuck my dick into your mouth

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Why did the chicken cross the road? It didn’t get to cross the road. Halfway through the crossing, it was hit by a car and turned into roadkill. Then a family of black people picked it up and turned it into fried chicken.

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Two muffins are sitting in an oven. They then proceed to bake into tasty pastries which are then eaten for snacks or maybe a light breakfast.

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Fish for a man, he has food for tonight. Teach a man how to fish and he will have one more skill under his belt.

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Why was the boy depressed? A. because his whole family was slaughtered on the kitchen floor.

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Who wants $300? Me too.

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What was the first thing the mother did when her baby was born? Weep. The baby was a was a stillborn.

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Why wasn't the drunk driver arrested when he killed a man? Because he died as well.

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what is brown and wet? Muddy water

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Why was the blonde crying? She had just been raped by a 10-foot praying mantis.

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What's black and blue and is scared to death? the kid in my trunk

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How do you make a tissue dance? Tissues are inanimate objects, they cannot dance and thinking otherwise is foolish.

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What do you call a man with no arms or legs skiing? Skip.

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Neutron walks into a bar and orders a drink. It never receives it because it can't talk and is far too small to see.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops