Wanna hear a joke? Women's rights

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what do babies and prostitutes have in common they will both cry if you hit them with a brick

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Jack and Jill went up the hill, to fetch a pail of water. Jack fell down and broke his crown, and Jill came tumbling after. Up Jack got, and home did trot, as fast as he could caper, to old Dame Dob, who proceeded to get Jill convicted of attempted murder, as well as several millions of dollars for pain and suffering.

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Why was Timmy sad? While helping his dad hang Christmas light, he got tangled up in them and fell down. While falling he grabbed a wire, which caused a spark. This spark lit the house on fire. Since he broke most of the bones in his body from falling he could not run away. The house proceeded to collapse an poor Timmy seriously injuring and hideously disfiguring him. By the time the ambulance got there, Timmy was the only survivor for his parents died of smoke inhalation. Since he had no other living relatives he was forced to live in an orphanage for the rest of his childhood. That is why Timmy is sad.

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, I'm colorblind.

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Roses are red Violets are blue I'm schizophrenic And so am I

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John has 32 candy bars. He eats 28. What does he have now? Diabetes. John has diabetes.

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a kid was running across the street. he just got hit by a truck

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A blonde goes to school, and completes a difficult math problem.

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Why did Helen Kellers dog run away? You would too if your name was Hjshdvcyehbretafvvba.

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What is a grammatically incorrect equestrian? An stallion.

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Why was Susie's mom crying? Because Susie got hit by a bus

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What say the mirror if i look in it,? He died

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if you have 2 apples and 3 oranges in one hand, and 4 oranges and 1 apple in the other, what do you have? very large hands.

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Why were corners made? For crying.

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You know what's funny? Rape

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Q.Why was 6 crying? A.Because 7,8,9

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There's 2 guys in a Y shaped road. One road leads to a cliff with deadly alligators below the river. The other road leads to the village. You can ask both of the guys one question to which leads to the village. However, one guy always tells the truth and the other guy always tells a lie. How do you get to the village? GPS

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Fart

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why does chuck norris not have a middle name? because his parents didn't want him to have one.

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A muslin walks into a bar, and has the same equal rights as everyone else and orders a pint of fosters.

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A horse walks into a bar and the bartender asks "Why the long face?" The horse replies "I have cancer"

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A guy walks up to a girl and says: " hey can I have your number so i can text you later?" she says " no" he says " why ?" she says" guess" He says " look if you don't like me thats okay, " he gets up and walks away, turns out she doesn't have a cell phone, she was gonna give him her house number to call.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

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The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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