Why did the chicken cross the road? Well, it was kind of by chance that it crossed the road and what is the big deal lots of animals cross the road. For example possums, squirrels, deer, raccoons, cats, dogs, rabbits do pretty often too it's weird because sometimes more rabbits cross the road on Easter I don't know if that's just me though, chipmunks, bears, over in Africa probably tigers and lions cross those roads.

What's the difference between a Duck and Michael Jackson? A Duck has feathers and goes "Quack quack" and Michael Jackson touches little boys......

A man walks into a pet shop. He says to the shopkeeper, "Excuse me, do you have any dogs going cheap?" The shopkeeper replies "We feel that we price our animals reasonably, but the cheapest type of dog we have is £50." The man realises that, unfortunately, he cannot afford a dog. Instead he purchases a goldfish. It wasn't the same.

Excuse me. Oh, would you mind hitting the 15th floor button for me? Thanks.

Q. What has two legs and is covered in red stuff? A. Half a dog

During a boxing match, a white man faces an Asian. The Asian loses. Next the white man faces a Mexican. The Mexican also loses. Now the white man faces a black man. "Aw screw it!"

what did the man write down? nothing,because at that time, his pen was out of ink, so he had to open his dest drawer to get another one

Whats the difference between a pile of dead babies and ferrari? I dont have a ferrari in my garage!

Stephen Hawking raped your mom

Why did the white man win the race Because there were no black people attending

What's worse, a dead baby or an abortion? A dead baby on a bayonet

What do you hear when you put your foot on a man's ear? A man saying, "WTF are you doing?!"

roses are red violets are blue god made me pretty what happened to you?

Two robots walk into a bar, just kidding, they have Polio.

Why did the little boy enter the white van, then leave scarred for life? He was going on a family trip within the said white van, but along the way they got in a horrible accident which involved a bus, a tractor, and finally a steamroller. The boy quickly escaped at the last second only to watch his family scream as the steamroller slowly crushed the van where they were trapped inside. He then broke down into tears and depression and finished it all by jumping off a bridge. It was a truly tragic incident.

What do u call a cripple Biv

whats the difference between a dead dog and a dead black guy on the road? there is skid marks leading up to the dog.

There was a black guy and a blonde crossing the street. They are not related.

Henry: Say the word "really". Moe: Really. Henry: Now say the word "really" with sarcasm. Moe: Really? Henry: More sarcasm! I want you to be very sarcastic! Moe: Oh really??? Henry: There ya go!

Yo mama so fat because it's in her genes.

How many Jews can you fit into a car? Well, it depends on how many Jews there are and what kind of car it is.

Why did the cow cross the road? -Because it lives in India and is allowed to.

what's the difference between eric bristow and colin baker? eric bristow is brilliant at darts.

So there were these two ovens in a muffin. One oven said "Holy fuck it's muffiny in here." The other oven said "Holy fuck a talking oven!"

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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