I wish you were never born. Me too. Then I wouldn't have been raped today.

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Jimmy and Ted are racing each other at the end ov the street. Jimmy is taller and thinner but Ted has more endurance. Who wins the race? A: the drunk driver

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Why was the black man hired at the clothing store? He needed some money to feed his family.

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Your mom is so skinny that she may have anorexia, yet she could treat it so she doesn't die.

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You know whats worse than an anti-joke? Practically Anything.

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I used to play Skyrim but then I took an arrow in the knee. Then, I played MW3 until I took a bullet in the elbow. And now, I'm in the hospital wondering why people keep harming me.

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A Jew! Bless you.

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What did the cow say to the chicken? Moo

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Guest what in the butt

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Awesome! I've just received my giftcode! >> minecraftnow.us <

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A very ugly man with has sex with a lamb because he is so ugly. He subsequently gets ghonorhea and dies 2 years later of brain cancer.

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Why can't Helen Keller drive? Because she's dead

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Why couldn't the Mexican man get a job? Because he was dead.

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ur gay

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Why did I have sex with your mom? Because she was a beautiful individual with a fine taste in the classical arts. She also offered me a ride to her place for a delicious 3 course meal. Afterwards our romance blossomed and we decided to have sexual intercourse to show our mutual appreciation for each other.

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What do you call Batman and Robin after they are run over by a steam roller? Dead

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What did your mother say after I beat her? Nothing, because she was dead.

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What did the DVD player say when a video tape was put in? You incompatible.

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Why did the lion get lost? -The jungle is massive

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A Muslim walks into a bar, and has a pint of lager because he has chosen to integrate into his host country's culture. He then leaves without incident.

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What's red and looks like blue paper? Red paper

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If you saw two cowboys in a kitchen, which would be the real one? Why do you automatically assume one of them is false, or that either of them is real?

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What goes round and knocks on windows? A paedophile.

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What do you get when you put a goat and an owl together? A goat and an owl

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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