Q: why did the white man buy a burge A: cuz he was hungry

What's worse than a truck full of dead babies? Trying to sell a used truck with dead baby stains all over it.

2 Penises

My grandmother always use to tell me "slow and steady wins the race." Well, that was before she died in a house fire.

My wife asked me to prepare our son for his first day of school. He's a ginger so I punched him in the face, and stole his lunch money.

Knock Knock. Who's there? Nancy Nancy who? Nancy.

Osama Bin Laden and a monk walk into a bar. Mistaken Identity. It was the Dalai Lama, Osama is dead.

What did the black man say to the young white woman during sex? you are a wonderful woman

Why did the little boy drop his ice cream? It was moldy and it was a home of many roaches.

Yo momma so fat, when she steps on the scales it reads 90kg

How did the chicken cross the road? Assuming the vehicles yielded to the chicken, it looked both directions before crossing then proceded across the street while staying between the crosswalk lines until it had reached the other side of the road.

Knock knock Who's there? Orange That's impossible...

whats black and has many friends? a kind sociable black person

Have you ever seen the episode of the powerpuff girls where they save the day?

What did the gay man say to the other gay man? Hey, we're both gay, let's have sex!

roses are red violets are blue most poems rhyme but this one doesnt

Horse walks into a bar... Bartender says It's probably not a good idea that you're in here. You're a very large animal. Any sudden movements, you may injure somebody. I don't know why you're here. None of the glasses are ergonomically designed for you to drink from them. So, you should probably leave.

A man works at a Doritos factory hes worked there for a few weeks and hes made the most Doritos in his line now and the head of the company gives him a promotion he now runs his own line a few months later the head of the company bob comes back to him and promoted him again to now our friend Carl is head of the Factory about two years later bob comes to Carl and hes promoted to head of the east coast he is head of 27 Factories about a decade later bob asks Carl if when he retires Carl will take over the company and he accepts bobs offer 23 years pass and bob retires Carl is the new head of the company so he is about like 65 at this point and he wants some wine so him and his buddies go for some wine Dan says Carl this lines two long so they decide to have some soda and then Jason says this lines longer then the last one so Aiden says to Carl why don't we go get some punch so they all got into line but there was no punch line a.w. j.p.

Q: What did the boy with no arms and legs get for Christmas? A: Cancer.

A boy asked his dad Why are Chinese eyes like that. His dad replied there concentrating that's why there so smart The boy went up to a student in his class and said look I'm like you The teacher asked who told him that he said his dad The dad was called up by the school when the teacher told him what his son did he went GOOZILLA His wife asked him what he was up to and he said farting on her face when she was a sleep 3 days later he found out his wife was cheating on him he knocked on the door only to realize he was on drugs and that he never had a family.

what did the child say to his mother? daddy raped me!

Doctor, doctor, I have a cavity! Go to the dentist.

What is the difference between a baby and a tree? Its not illegal to hit one with an axe

What's worse then getting a broken bone? A large marsupial charging at you with vicious speed

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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