What has four legs, is green and furry, and if it falls out of a tree it will kill you? A pool table.

What is a ghost's favorite appetizer? Ghosts aren't real.

What do you call 100 dead babies in my garage? Murder.

Have you heard about the Polish kamikaze pilot? No, you haven't, because it would be historically and culturally incorrect.

Anti jokes are funny, but also not.

Jerry: Hi what's your name? Bob: My name is bob. Jerry: Bob, nice to meet you, my name is Jerry. Bob: Nice to meet you Jerry.

A guy is sitting at home when he hears a knock at the door. He opens the door and sees a snail on the porch. He picks up the snail and throws it as far as he can. Three years later, there’s a knock on the door. He opens it and sees the same snail. The snail says "What the hell was that all about?"

A man is boarding a plane. The attendant asks if he has a passport. The man says no, and leaves.

An American and Russian are arguing about their country. The American says "I can do things you can't. I can walk into the White House and into the Oval Office. I can bang my hands on my President's desk and say "Mr. Obama, I don't like the way you're running your country." The Russian says, "I can do that." The American says, "No, you can't." The Russian says, "Sure I can. I can go to Vladimir Putin's office and say "Mr. President, I don't like the way Mr. Obama's running his country."

What did Batman say to Robin befor they got in the car? Get in the car.

What's worse than 6 dead babies in a trash can? More than 6.

if two couples walk down the street, when do they die? when a pack of rabid dogs eats them.


Do you know why I'm bored???? No why are you bored Because I am

*knock knock "there's a door bell"

The number 69 is? Just a plain old number that has just as much meaning as 68 and 70.

There once was a girl from Nantucket, I've heard its nice there this time of year.

Q: How do you surprise a newt? A: Jump on it while shouting, "slippers." This may not work as the newt may die before it has the chance to be surprised, however the slippers should be intact.

Why did the chicken cross the road? Because it was about to get raped.

What's black and hangs from my tree? A black man. I am a racist.

The Holocaust

what is an antijoke? a type of comedy in which the joke ends in an antivlimax that it is funny in its own right GDS*

Who wants pizza crusts?

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book

NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!


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