hi

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Why did Sarah fall of the swing ? Because she had no arms Knock Knock Who's there? Well it cant be sarah

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a blond, brunette, and red head all walk out of a hair salon.

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1500 Jews were ordered to walk along a straight path whilst in the midst of a blizzard. How close did they ever get to the end? What end? They marched until every last bit of their rotten flesh was driven from their weak bodies. --ZeNaziGermanDoctor

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because chickens have 2 legs

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Why did Julia fall of the swings? She had no arms. Knock knock? Who's there? Not Julia.

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Two hunters are out in the woods when one of them collapses. He doesn't seem to be breathing and his eyes are glazed. The other guy whips out his phone and calls the emergency services. He gasps, "My friend is dead! What can I do?". The operator says "Calm down. I can help. First, let's make sure he's dead." There is a silence, then the man said "he has a pulse". The operator then calmly stated "we are sending a helicopter to air lift him out of there as we speak". The man got helicoptered to the nearest ER, and the doctors did their best to save him. He ended up having to go on life support for three years until his family members finally decided to pull the plug. The medical insurance didn't cover life support and the family went broke because of it.

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Bible Games aka Bible Buffet: SEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEGAAAAAAAAAAAAA! Sometime after the death and return of Superma... Jesus. God: RAISE FROM YOUR GRAVE! Jesus slays holy white beasts: POWER UP! POWER UP! HOMO UP! Uh did he say homo u... ARGH! CANNOT CONTAIN LEVEL OF HOMO! TURNING FURFAG/ALTERED BEAST. A wild Saten appears!: WELCOME TO YOUR DOOM! Jesus used gay wolf punch, it was not very effective... wild Saten uses OMFG HE TEARS OFF HIS OWN HEAD AND THROWS IT AT JESUS! Its super effective! Jesus Dies. Moral: Second coming? He came back to meet his disciples and crap AFTER quoting "ill be back", did he promise some third coming? Is that why people have been waiting for over 2000 years? :P

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Why did the baby cross the road? Because it was stapled to the chicken

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being sober in a bar fight

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Freedom of Speech

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What do you call two mexicans playing basketball? A good example of friendly competition.

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When Chuck Norris does a push up, he's working out.

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Roses are red Violets are red I murdered the gardener

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*insert lame joke stolen from the top 10 jokes and think it's original because I changed one word*

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What did the Asian man say to the African man Ching Chang Chong

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why can't Amy ride on the rollercoaster? Because she's under the height limit.

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dear GIRLS, roses are red violets are blue faces like yours belong in the zoo don't be mad i will be there too not in the cage but laughing at u .

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What do Native Indians and Asian Indians have in common? They're both human.

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My brownie is so warm and squishy. You know what else is warm and squishy? Freshly killed babyies

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What the last thing that went through Osama's mind? A bullet

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What did the vegetarian eat for christmas? Food.

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Why was the man happy to see his wife dead? He beat her

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Wow, so it is true, you are here the entire fucking time aren't you bitch? You and all "six billion of your followers of the dark", listen asshead, one thing is people asking ME when I FUCKING SIGN BOOKS (which does not happen all that FUCKING OFTEN!) Why I lead a fucking cult of sorts. Another one is having your goons stab me in the FUCKING EYE, and going "Oh I am like so sorry, please let me be the gayest I can be" People assaulting me because I use the "Moralman identity" IT IS MINE! My real FUCKING NAME IS NERO! I DON'T GO AROUND STEALING NOBODY`S SHIT!

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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