Roses are red, Violets are BLACK!

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Roses are gay, Violets are gay, I f*cked your mom You have aids.

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Your mom is so fat, you might be dyslexic

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How many boring people does it take to change a light bulb? One.

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roses are red violetes are blue you need to shut up or I will kill you

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why did the slytherin cross the road twice? ... because they are double-crossers.

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Q: What do you get when you stand a blonde on her head? A: HORSE DICK

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Connor is such a dope, he doesn't even know Betty White jokes aren't funny.

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What did the girl with no arms or legs get for Christmas? Cancer .

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A horse shits himself SHITLESS!

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Like if you have a vagina. Also like if you have a dong. (Penis)

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Roses are red, violets are blue shut the hell up, and sit the hell down

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Why did the first monkey fall out of the tree ? Because he was dead. Why did the second monkey fall out of the tree? Because he was attached to the first monkey. Why did the third monkey fall out of the tree? Because he thought it was a game. Why did the tree fall over? It thought it was a monkey.

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A doctor walks out of the delivery room and relieves A nervous father, telling him that his new baby girl has just been born with great health. The father sighs in relief as happiness overwhelms him. With such great news, the doctor chuckles and continues on with the rest of what he had to relay to the father. Your wife died during the delivery.

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Two men are walking down the street. They both don't make eye contact and continue walking.

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How do you wake up Lady Gaga? Poker Face

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How many pieces of toast can you eat in 1 year? well, it depends on how many pieces you eat in one day, does it count snacks, or full meals of just toast, can you eat even when your not hungary, if you throw up does it still count? If it is 1 piece a day, it would be 365.

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knock knock. who's there myfeth myfeth who myfether came off

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Why did the car break down? Because breakfast was done.

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What's brown and slimy? brown slime

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In this country, you gotta get the money first. Then when you get the money, you get the power. Then when you get the power, you get shot the F*** up at the end of Scarface.

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Why did Juan cross the border into America? To provide a better opportunity for him and his family.

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A horse walks into a bar, the bartender says "Why the long face?" The horse says "I have cancer."

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Sonny Bono walked into a bar. No, wait, he crashed into a tree.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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