If Jimmy has 50 pieces of candy and eats 40 of them, what does he have now? Jimmy has diabetes.

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Why did Martian Luther King climb the mountain? Because there was a KFC on top

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Q. Where do you find Indonesia A. On a map

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Bob: Hey Jim, what's up? Jim: Obviously the sky, oh and i see a few planes too. by the way why are you asking me why don't you just look up?

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What do you call a guy wearing a white leisure suit? Mister Rourk? No, you call the dud wearing the white duds.

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Why are you looking here? The joke's in your hand.

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So this guy comes into a bar... Jizz eveywhere.

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I went to the game and saw a Mexican wave. So I waved back at him.

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If I could rearrange the alphabet, I'd probably put all the labials, coronals and dorsals in separate places sorted into plosives, nasals and fricatives, with the vowels at the beginning sorted by their relative IPA chartings, to make it more logical and easily attainable to foreigners.

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What do you call a black guy flying an airplane? A pilot.

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Dear Jim, I have a problem with my Hymen... "Jim'll fix it for you..."

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What's the difference between an ant and a dinosaur? They are both birds, apart from the ant and the dinosaur

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What did Helen Keller name her dog? ruh-ruh-blah-blah-bluh

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What do Ed Milliband and David Milliband have in common? They are brothers.

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Why can't orphans play baseball? They don't know where home is.

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What did the black man get for christmas? A present.

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Why was Jim fired from his job at the sperm bank? Continual absenteeism and inconsistent work.

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What is the difference between a white gut and a black guy? The level of melanin in their skin.

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Woman.

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A newly wed couple is at the beach and the wife asks for sunscreen and the man says he forgot it in the car. He goes to the car only to find that the car had been broken into. He goes to call his wife and they go back to the car only to find that the car had been stolen. #Turns out the thief broke the window to steal the car but saw the owner coming and hid behind a bush and upon the man going to call his wife he continued with his mission

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Yo momma, she so fat, she needs to buy extra-large clothes.

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Why cant your mom breathe She chockin on my D**K

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whats a bike and rhymes with mike?

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The last joke I tried to submit used "trolololol" as the enter code thing and I spelled it without the extra "lol" The lolz have got me again *this time it asked me for "basket case"

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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