A man walks into a bar and says "ow"

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He is so gay that he likes penis.

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What did the man say when he lost his phone? Answer: I lost my phone!!

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girls basketball

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your mums so fat! "last time i heard that i fell of my dinosaur!!" Oh man are you ok?

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What did the Hungarian say before he went to bed? "I'm going to bed," but he said it in Hungarian.

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What do you can an astronaut with an apple? Never mind, I have a boner.

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If John has 50 candy bars and eats 45, what does he have? Diabetes. John has diabetes.

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what's the difference between a duck?

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whats white? everything thats not black, yellow, pink, red, blue, orange, purple, green, indigo, turquiose, grey, brown, khaki, gols, silver, bronze.

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What do you call a black man carrying a T.V? Someone that is helping me move.

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Your momma is so fat that she is on a diet and exercises regularly.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? I don't know.

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why did jimmy's mom fall off the cliff? i dont know.

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What's worse than tripping over your shoelace? Watching your mother get her tits cut off with a chainsaw then getting ripped apart and eaten alive by cannibals

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A man buys some expensive lingerie for his wife on the occasion of their 10th wedding anniversary. After a lovely candlelight dinner at home, he tells her to close her eyes at which point he retrieves the gift box containing her anniversary present. Thoroughly exited, she rips open the box and takes out the beautiful garment, holding it up to the light in wide-eyed amazement. Her husband gives her a suggestive wink and says "would you like to join me in the bedroom to try it on?" To which she replies, "I AIN'T YER WHORE!"

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Q. How many trees does it take to change a light bulb? A. Trees can't change light bulbs.

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Knock knock. Who's there? Navy Seals. *BOOM* *waiting* "Yeah, he's dead." -Navy Seals

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a man walks into a bar. ouch. that must suck, but he should really look where he's going

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Why did Sally fall off the swing? She had no arms. Knock, knock. Who's there? Not Sally.

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What is the biggest killer in America? Death.

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What is wet, white and sticky? Glue, of course.

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Why did the black man jump off the cliff? Well , you see, this black mans name was yargle, and during his high school years, people always made nicknames for him some of which were fat yargle, yargaryar, and bottomyarg. He thought to himself that wanted revenge, So he killed the entire population of earth. Oh ya, and since he was the last human, wirhout possibility of reproduction, he went to the store and bought a can of soup

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Why didnt the black man run the marathon? He was in jail

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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