Why did the plane crash? Because the pilot was a loaf of bread.

What's the difference between a dead baby in my garage and a Ferrari in my garage? I don't have a Ferrari.

*insert lame joke stolen from the top 10 jokes and think it's original because I changed one word*

Women's rights.

::ring::ring::ring:: Hello? Is your refrigerator running? Yes, yes it does! Why? I work for a local home appliance superstore and we are having a special on repairs and maintenance. Would you like to try our home appliance maintenance offer? I'm sorry no! I do not actually have a refrigerator. I only have a cooler. Bye! ::the man shuts off his cell phone and sets it on top of his styro-foam cooler as he mumbles to himself alone while on his boat, "Darn advertisement offers!" and continues to fish in the middle of the lake::

Patient: Doctor, doctor! I feel like a pair of curtains! Doctor: That's because you are. Patient: Wow, I need to lay off the mushrooms.

When I get aroused I get a solid snake

Why couldn't Helen Keller drive? She was blind and deaf, leaving her unable to respond to external stimuli and thus unlikely to able to pass a basic driving test.

A man walks in to a bar, Has a drink, and leaves.

What did the fireman say to the people in the burning house I'm going to use this water for my sprinkler rather than saving your lives. I might as well use this for something more significan, like my lawn.

Why is 6 afraid of 7? 7 is a terrorist.

What worse than a bee sting? Two bee stings. What worse than two bee stings? The Holocaust What worse than the Holocaust? Three bee stings

What kind of gun cant shoot bullets Hand guns

What's sad about 4 black people in a Cadillac going over a cliff? They were my friends.

Why did Lindsay Lohan talk to her car? Because she's insane

What's worse than the Holocaust? Very few things are worse than this international tragedy Over six million people died, most of them tortured before they died. But stepping on a thumb tack is way up there

Friends and Potatoes are similar...if u eat them try die.

Roses are red Violets are blue I tryed to hang myself But my neck qad to fat

Why didn't Sarah come to school today? She had a heart attack and died.

A horse walked into a bar. Several people got up and left as they spotted the potential danger in the situation.

knock knock who's there? ketchup ketchup who? better catchup with me!

Women's rights

Why did Alfa Kurtoo change his name? Just say Alfa Kurtoo fast!

Why are asians bad drivers? Driving schools in asia are severely less developed and therefore produce less experienced and skillful drivers. They also have asian eyes (:

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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