A zebra walks into bar, the surrounding customers in the bar become very intrigued why this exotic creature has wandered from Africa into New york. Before they can come to a concluson animal control opens fire on the creature, splatering its organs onto the tables. This event ruined the night for most customers and they fileout of the bar calmly but sad

What did the Nazi solider receive on his birthday? A bayonet up his ass.

Whats the difference between a black man and a bucket of shit? The bucket.

Why did the chicken cross the road? It was being chased by a wolf that eventually killed and ate it.

Knock Knock The guy opens the door

What is blue and feels like a shirt? A blue shirt.

Yo momma is so fat that....actually she's quite fit and i'd love to take her out on a date.

How did the cookie monster die? Diabidies

Yo momma is so fat, that she is not able to wear the clothes she wore the previous year.

What did the apple tree say to the farmer? Well! since trees nor apples have the ability to talk I would say the apple tree said nothing. And if the farmer thinks it did say something he should visit the doctors to check his hearing. The End.

A lysdexic man tries to spell rentally metarded.

Why couldn't Helen Keller drive? She never got her drivers license.

a guy walks into the bedroom with a duck in his arms, his wife is in bed half nakid. he then coments out loud this is the pig im f**king. his wife says huny your holding a duck. then he with a serious look on his face says im sory i wasent talking to you

fish fishy caoimhin

Whats the difference between a baby in a comma and an iPod? I actually use the baby.

whats uglyand cry , and screams mommy ... you after i bitch slap you

Why was the blond stupid? She wasnt, its just that everyone loves stereotypes

What's the difference between a bird? Both legs are the same, especially the left one

why was the black kid so good at basketball because he practiced a lot

Why Is Jarrod spencer gay Coz he is

A blonde walks into a store and tells the clerk "I'd like to buy that microwave". The clerk says "we don't sell things to blondes.". The blonde comes in the shop the next day with a brown wig on and says "I'd like to buy that microwave". The clerk says "we don't sell things to blondes". The blonde asks how he knew she was a blonde. The clerk replies, "I can see flyaway strands of your hair from the top of your wig and the synthetic hair material of the wig is not convincing.

how many members of the australian greens party does it take to write legislation? none, it's already been done for them by Karl Marx

On a plane directed to Buffalo there are: an italian, a french and a greek. They all go there for tourism

so i was F***in this guy the other day with my penis.....shit! i mean i was F***in this girl and i jizzed

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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