Why did the cat cross the street? It didn't. I cut off its arms and legs so it couldn't walk.

I am Asian, I've seen the color blue, but God made a mistake, Asians are taller than you.

Why did the chicken cross the road? To get to the other side.

What song does a bulimic person sing while on the toilet? Nothing Bulimic people don't poop.

A talent agency is giving auditions and is just about to rap it up when a family shows up. They reluctantly agree to their "brief" audition given that they had found no suitable talent that day. The routine starts with the father starting 6 chainsaws at once while simultaneously starting a juggling/lumberjacking routine. His beautiful wife proceeds to toss him additional chainsaws (as he continually throws them for dramatic effect) while also maintaining a hypnotizing dance which seems to drain your desire to leave from your very soul. The children take turns jumping in between the chainsaws while doing a silent replay of the movie, "Crouching Tiger, Hidden Dragon." After it plays out the father tosses the final chainsaw up in the air which lands standing straight, quivering in the dust of the studio. The studio manager says, "Why that's an AMAZING act!! I'll sign you right now! What do you call your act?" In response to which, the father shits on his desk.

why do people copy other people's anti-jokes? because they don't have a life nor an imagination. P.S. if this gets a lot of thumbs ups, expect another one soon from one of those people who copy others anti-jokes...

why was the man walking in the kitchen? idk thats why i asked

What's worse than strapping 10 dead baibes to a tree? Strapping a dead baby to 10 trees.

Why did the chicken cross the road? He was in the designated crosswalk area and there was no oncoming traffic.

Knock Knock. Who the hells there? Nevermind.

old mcdonald had a farm had..... he now lives in the city

My girlfriend reckons that a small penis shouldn't affect our sex life. She may be right, but I'd prefer it if she didn't have one.

why dose micheal jackson like 29 year olds Because there is 20 of them

How do you starve a zombie? You dont, they are allready dead.

Why did Janie miss school today? Because she fell in a well.

Why was the man called Big Larry? His name was Larry and he was morbidly obese.

womens rights

I am a joke. I am funny.

You can pick your friends, and you can pick your nose... But you cannot be a dinosaur!

9/11

What did walt disney say to the Jew? Nothing. Walt Disney didn't know the man was Jewish and didn't have time to make himself acquainted with the fellow.

Q. Why was little Timmy crying? A. Because his sister died of cancer.

The chicken hesitated to cross the road. It pondered endlessly on the ramifications of not crossing the road, the future jokes that would never have been made. So it crossed the road with no real purpose for others to come up with unique ideas. Just kidding there is no proof that chickens have ever existed. There is proof that Barack Obama is a woman, however.

Guest what? Dog

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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