Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? Because it was dead.

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Why does the kid cries when he sees me? Cuz i took his lollypop last week.

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A woman walks out of the kitchen.

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What do you call a deer with no eye? NO IDEAR!

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A man opens his sock drawer, grabs his socks and puts them on.........He dies 5 minutes later.

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What's funnier than a chicken? nothing.

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Why did the little boy fall asleep? His parent pulled the plug.

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What the difference between a alien and you nothing

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What do you call cheese that isn't your's Well it would depend on what type of cheese it actually is

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what did the boy with no arms or legs get for christmas? a bike

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Q: why did the cookie go to the doctor??? A: because he was sick

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What do you call a black guy eating fried chicken? His name.

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I like cheese. You like cheese. Have a nice day.

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What did the little girl with no legs or arms get for Christmas? Cancer. Knock knock? Who's there? Not that little girl.

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What did the underaged man say when he walked in the bar? He asked for a Coke.

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Q: What did the peanut say to the shell? A: Its dark in here.

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The early bird gets the worm, but the angry bird gets the pig.

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Once upon a time, there was a ghost. The ghost was sneaking up on a little girl when she turned around and asked the ghost "Are you a stalker or something?" The ghost, unable to reply (being a ghost) was then kicked in the shins. The End!

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What do you call a big group of Chinese people on Mars? An extraordinary feat for the Chinese space program and a historic day in human history, where a particular country has set up the first human colony on another planet and we have proven to ourselves that our race is capable of interplanetary travel and can accomplish anything if we set our minds to it.

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What did the dog say to the other dog? Were both dogs!

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So two cannibals are eating a clown. Cannibal one: Does this taste funny to you? Cannibal two: Considering that this man was a clown he must have been in poverty so he resulted to being an alcoholic and maybe over dosed on over the counter drugs. Cannibal one: Thank you for that reasonable answer.

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"Hell nahhh I called shotgun" -Rosa Parks

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A plane crashed in the border of mexico and USA. Where do you bury the survivors? tell me in the thing bellow

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How many dead babies can you fit inside Casey Anthony's trunk? Trick question. She didn't do it.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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