What's worse than taking a final? Getting shot in the face.

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Hello! I am Harry Potter, and i will be teaching you pottery today! Yes, call me Mr. Pottery!

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why was their a child on the sun? There wasn't he would be incinerated

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What's there like a good neighbor? Your neighbor

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I was relaxing on the beach today when a fat bird came over and said, "Would you rub this lotion into my back please?" "I'm afraid I'm only here for the day," I replied.

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Roses are Red, Violets are Blue, That's what they tell me because I'm blind.

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where was Billy during the bomb? Every where

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Is it possible to mix an answer to a question with another? No. Aids are perfect for fear training.

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Why couldn't the mexican feed his family? Because a large percent of mexican immigrants in the United States do not have jobs due to dicrimination against illegal immigrants crossing the soutern border, thus rendering them more vunerable to unemployment is that is vastly present in the United States.

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What happened when the child missed his school bus home? He had to take the long 6 mile walk back home and did not return until dinner time.

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What do you call to guys who gave gave each other HIV? Blood-Brothers

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A lion walks in to a bar, and murders everyone inside. This is why animals are not aloud in bars.

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Why was the asian a bad driver? Because while he was driving a leprechaun was punching him in the face.

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Two friends sit down to dinner, the third is late so they eat him

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Nock Nock It's open.

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Sometimes while i am play my music loudly in my apartment my neighbor knocks on the wall He is slowly losing his grip on reality and believes the wall is a door

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all ur antijoke are belong to us or i mean we can share, whatever

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What's worse then a worm in your apple? When your apples a human

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Well, first of all, what I have overcome both mentally (trauma) and physically (lots of shit) is in the past, lets leave it there. Second yeah, I can basically shift my sense of left and right at will, meaning I can choose which arm to write with, and write things mirrored without even thinking about it, I can fool my senses basically, one second I struggle playing the piano because I have just trained with one, then I make my brain believe I have been practicing with both, its simple, but complicated to explain, while my ears are perfectly normal, I got two sets of balance nerves, it just gets more complicated from there.

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q.how do u kill a jew? a.you glue a penny to the bottom of a pool

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What do you call Michael? A homosexual person who is nice, however he is still gay.

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Welcome To Facebook

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how come the exorcist eat crème brülé? because that deserves a carlsburg

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Knock Knock Who's there? A Crazy Rhinoceros

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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