What do you call cheese thats not yours? Somebody elses cheese

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OK, A plane carrying 200 passengers crashes on the border between America and Canada. Which side of the border do you bury the victims? Well, it would depend on where the passengers where from or what they had stipulated in their living will. I suppose some would be cremated which opens up a whole other can of worms entirely.

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Whats faster than a mexican running down the street with your TV? An airplane

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What did the Mexican firefighter name his twin boys? Thomas and David after his father and grandfather.

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Why did the plane crash? The pilot was a load of bread.

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Why do women get pregnant? Beacuse it hurts and they deserve it.

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Who enslaves small people and forces them to work in his factory all year round in ridiculous outfits. Santa

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What's the difference between a duck A chair Vests have no sleeves

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haiku's are stupid, and do not always make sense, refrigerator.

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what has 4 legs three eyes and a horn? a:yo mama

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Life is like a box of chocolates. Well...not really no. It's not.

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Yo mamma so black that u can't see her eyebrows

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Why did the chicken cross the road? No soap, radio!

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A man is in a bar with a drink A lorry driver come in a gulp the guys drink down The man starts crying the lorry driver says"don't cry I will buy you another" The guy says "it's not that: Today I woke up late for work and when I finally got there my boss fired me so I get in my car to go home and it wont start so I walk home while it's raining and when I got in I found that my wife was sleeping with the gardener so I came down here and asked for some poison and you went and drank it"

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Guy1:should I ask this girl out? Guy2:NO!!!!!!! Guy1:????????

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Yeah its just my way of saying that I appreciate you worrying so much about me, you are a sweet girl, Honestly I do not understand why the hell you guys are using Horsehead AntiJoke out of all places, there are far more terrible forgettable sites available, I mean this sites connection suddenly went from disgustingly terrible to fine and dandy, the Feds, the Interpol and even fucking Al Qaeda might be reading every single message, but there is no way in hell anyone can decipher the code format, if they could, they would have done it when I invented it sixteen years ago, Myself mind you, nothing subtle about me today apparently.

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Knock knock It's open, come in

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Daisies are green, poppies are white, I have a headache.

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What do you call a low-fat banana? A nothing...

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what did the old lady die of old age...

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Dani Barton is not that! She is a great girl with a strong heart and feelings. The statement below is a joke, hence why it was published on AntiJokes. This is NOT a joke however.

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what should you say when your mates nan is in hospital with a broken leg??? ha ha my nan can stand up shes just genetically better

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Why did the Catholic priest get excommunicated from the church? He couldn't read.

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Why did the chicken cross the road. To get to the other side. Original anti joke.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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