What was the woman doing in the kitchen? Investigating a murder..

You're so ugly, When you look in the mirror it displays you're reflection because that is what mirrors do

why was the boy crying. Brcause him and his two sisters got raped by a diseased polar bear. by rangler. thumbs up for more.

if quizzes are quizzical, arent tests testical?

Why did the boy fail his test? Because he got shot before he could even study.

Brett Favre sent me a pic of his penis. I then compared it to my own and felt good about my general ackage size

yo momma's so dumb she attended a dyslexic test and was proven mildly autistic.

Arrow to the Knee

whats 2+2? 4

what do you call a man that just got brutally murdered? i don't know, check his birth certificate.

why did Samantha fall off the building? She was hit by a flying fridge dropped by a traffic helicopter.

Little Johnny is sleeping overnight at a school camping trip. The teacher goes around to check tents to make sure everybody is falling asleep fine. Little Johnny, however, says, "Miss, I am scared of the dark. Can I sleep in your tent instead?" The teacher reluctantly agrees, finishes checking around and brings Little Johnny to her tent. "Miss, can I play with your belly button with my finger? My mommy lets me", asks little Johnny. The teacher reluctantly agrees. Suddenly, the teacher jumps up. "THAT WASN'T MY BELLY BUTTON!", she shouts. "Yeah," says Little Johnny. "Well that wasn't my finger, either."

Why did the chicken cross the road? I stole your wallet and used to buy a prostitute. I had a great time. What was the question again?

knock knock. who's there? whoer whoer who? whoer you?

Why did the first monkey fall out of the tree? Because he was DEAD! But why did the second monkey fall out of the tree? Because he was stapled to the first monkey... But then why did the third monkey fall out of the tree? P-p-p-p-eer pressure

why was the gay person gay? he liked penis in his bum.

Lets Go Lakers!

Your momma's so fat she died five years ago.

slaughter the mussies #EDL

Three black men go to the basketball courts one day hoping to play some ball. On the way there they see a homeless man with a sign that says "Homeless. Anything will help." However, since they were on there way to play ball, none of them found it necessary to bring cash, thus resulting in them walking by the homeless man without giving him any money.

Why did the girl drop her ice cream? Because seeing as a bus was heading straight toward her, she quickly decided to sacrifice her frozen treat and dodge the oncoming vehicle in order to save her life.

Q: How did the man walk across the road? A: With his own 2 feet!

Roses Are Potato, Violets Are Booze, Im Irish and i hate Jews.

Knock, knock! Who's there?! Your Mom! Your Mom who? No really. Let me in.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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