What's the difference between a Jew and an apple? One of them is a fruit, and the other is not.

A guy walks into a bar and orders 4 shots. The bartender promptly pulls out a gun and shoots him 4 times.

When Michael Jackson was in a dark tunnel, it didn't work when he turned his flashlight. How come? A: Because it was out of battery

Whats funnier than an anti joke? a real one.

What's black and white and red all over? A Nazi banner.

whats black and white and red all over? a zebra crossing after a horrible, horrible car accident

Knock, knock! Who's there? Mary Mary who? Mary Smith.

Where did Sally go in the bombing? Everywhere

What do a Fascist and a Democrat both have in common? Involvement in politics.

How do you survive the plague? you dont.

Period Blood

We didnt star the fire ...........

Your mom is so old she died

Why did the chicken cross the road? Because my first shot missed.

Two stoners walk into a bar. They didn't drive there because they were high and wanted to enjoy a cool, evening stroll.

What's the deal with airline food... It has to be packaged and prepared in such a way large quantities of people can eat the meal with minimal preparation, which results in lower quality. If you don't like it, order a drink from the cart.

What did the little boy with diabetes get for Christmas? A shot of insulin; just like every other day.

Sometimes sentences just don't end the way that you think they potato

KNOCK KNOCK who's there? hello is anybody there? hello?....... .....the number your trying to reach has been removed please hang up the door knob and put the squirrel back in the lawnmower were belongs

A cannibal went for a walk and he passed his brother.

Really sorry Red, I did not mean to leave you hanging, and I hope you wont leave me hanging either, I just need my meds or thinks can get ugly, my health, I can tell you and even show you what my condition is, and heck show you my meds, but there are certain things even I wont spread on horsehead network, you know, people are so bitchy here on the internet, and if people knew what I got, yeaaah, I may start getting green thumbs, and I HAAAAAAATE those. Seriously, on a scale of zero (my ass) to ten, how insane do you see me as?

What's worse than swing a dead baby by a rope? Stopping it with a shovel.

Knock Knock Who's There? Bill Bill Who? Builder

Knock knock. "Who's there?" I am deaf. "I am deaf who?" What?

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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