Why didn't the girl put on her mascara? Because she was too poor to buy any.

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Trashcan!

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why did the black man fall down the stairs? he was blind, do to loss of vision from cancer

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What's the difference between a single mom and a stripper? Job status.

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Why couldn't little Jimmy play catch with his dad? Because he was an orphan.

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Why did sally fall off the swing? Because she had no arms. Knock knock. Who's there? Not sally.

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Jack and Jill went up the hill to smoke some marijuana, Jack got high, pulled down his fly, and asked Jill if she wanna. Jill said yes, pulled up her dress, and had a little fun. But stupid Jill forgot the pill, and now they have a son

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There are 5 men in a desert a black man a white man a gay a lesbian and a white woman they have no food or water and haven't had any in 3 weeks civilization is 1 mile away how many people live and which ones They all die you can only live 3 days without water.

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Why do firemen wear red suspenders? To keep their pants up.

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What is blue and looks like a bucket? A blue bucket

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Why was six afraid of seven? A: He just does.

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Knock Knock! Hmm. I'm not expecting anyone. It's probably just a telemarketer, and I'm not very interested in purchasing anything at the moment. I won't answer it.

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I used to fit trough doors, but then I got tall... I used to play with other babies, but then I got tall... (daradadadadan) I used to look up to you, but then I got tall (OH YEAH!) but then I got tall, but then I got tall, but then I got tall! Moral: Censorship should be illegal.

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How do you tell if a kitten is alive? Throw it at the wall.

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Why did the pumpkin stop using the jack hammer? Pumpkins cannot use power tools since they are nothing but orange gourds. But, [for sport] say this ‘pumpkin’ was incarnate; one could assume he was done with his demolition work. He then would return the portable drill to the rental facility and get his deposit back.

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What's worse than loading babies into a garbage truck. Answore: unloading them with a pitch fork.

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Knock knock. Who's there? Not Heath Ledger.

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Who lives in a pineapple under the sea? No-one because that's not feasible.

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what did the cab driver say to the black man when he got into his cab? Where to, sir?

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Why didn't the man eat the carrots? Because he was a vegetarian.

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You still alive? I used to be called proteus by the way, but then you disappeared and Neronism or watever its called now turned insane. I mean we killed you man! Out of mercy, you telling me a jacket changed you and everything? Where have you been? Six million followers? And all the shit that has made "moral man" the most lauded thing on Horsehead is you? Mind helping me make sense out of all of this?

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In soviet Russia - some people were poor.

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What did one lawyer say to the other lawyer? I'm sleeping with your wife

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What did the one man say to the other? Nothing, they didn't know eachother

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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