Why couldn't the towel talk? Because it didn't have a language.

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how do you get a clown to fall off a swing? hit it with an axe

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Knock knock? Who's there? Not Schrodinger's cat, or is it?

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whats red and hard to eat a brick.

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I'm on the seafood diet, a large proportion of my daily food intake consists of fish.

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There's two bears in a bathtub, One looks at the other and says "hey can you pass the soap?" the other bear says "what do i look like a light bulb?"

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why did the bus hit the kid? he dropped his ice cream.

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A man walks into a bar and says ouch, as he stubbed his foot when he became fully enclosed in the tavern.

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Why are you so gay? Because I am a homosexual.

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What would happen if an asian guy and a black guy had a baby? Nothing. It is impossible for a baby to be born since men produce sperm cells not egg cells and for a fetus to form, you need an egg and a sperm, so you would need a male and a female so since they are both men it is physically impossible for them to produce a child.

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what do call a purple animal that eats rocks? A purple rock eater..

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Q: How many babies does it take to paint a wall? A: Depends how hard you throw them.

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What do you call a chair in the middle of the road? A danger to drivers.

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Q: What is green, jumps and says i'm a frog? A: A frog that talks

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what do you call a needle with two heads? a two headed needle

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Q: What's fat and smelly? Q: What's worse than Nikki Manaj? Q: What's the bane of everyone and everything's existence? A: Kim Kardashian

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Man- Where can I find a book on the holocaust Book keeper- Have you tried comedy? Man- no I havent Book keeper- good it won't be there

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Brad Fuller!

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Man don't you hated when birds shit all over your car! Man I'm glad cows don't fly!

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EVOLUTION OF MODERN SAYINGS 1 The Samurai: If at first you don't succeed, kill yourself. The British: If at first you don't succeed, give up The Americans: If at first you don't succeed, sue someone, then try again in hopes of a larger payout next time

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What is better than winning a gold medal at the parolympic games? Having two legs!

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Whats the difference between a baby and a bowling ball? I dont have a bowling ball stapled to my tree

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Whats plastic and phonie a phone

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What do baseball and The Holocaust have in common? They're both sports, except for the The Holocaust.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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