Why did the boys uncle stop calling him? His uncle died of cancer 3 months ago.

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why did the slytherin cross the road twice? ... because they are double-crossers.

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Q. what is your favorite food? A. Chicken, burritos, sandwich, rice, hot dog, turkey, duck, carrot, broccoli, eggplant, apple, blueberry, pear, raspberry, blackberry, orange, grapes fries, chips, cheese, pretzels, worms, and candy canes.

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Why'd the man walk his dog His pen ran out of ink

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What's worse than dropping your ice cream? Getting a virus that slowly deteriorates your body from the inside out.

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A boy asked his dad Why are Chinese eyes like that. His dad replied there concentrating that's why there so smart The boy went up to a student in his class and said look I'm like you The teacher asked who told him that he said his dad The dad was called up by the school when the teacher told him what his son did he went GOOZILLA His wife asked him what he was up to and he said farting on her face when she was a sleep 3 days later he found out his wife was cheating on him he knocked on the door only to realize he was on drugs and that he never had a family.

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What's funnier than 24? Nothing, 24 is just a number. There's is nothing humorous about it. Go away.

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I was sitting in traffic the other day. I got ran over

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A duck walks into a doctor's office. Quack.

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Why don't Polish girls swim in the sea? The only sea that Poland borders on is the Baltic. Throughout most of the year this sea is too cold to comfortably swim in.

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What do u call a boomerang that doesnt come back A stick

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A black man accidentally walks into a white man. They apologize to each other and carry on with the rest of their day.

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How do you get four gay guys on a bar stool? With teamwork and coordination, each could place one foot on the seat, and they can all stand up using each other for balance and support. The fact that they are gay in unimportant.

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what does a chair look like? a chair.

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Why was six afraid of seven? Because seven had an extra penis.

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NO! I'm putting it in my front room, you sick bastard!

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Guess What!? What?! GIGGITY GIGGITY GOOOOOOOOO!!!!! (ALL RIGHT) OH.

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What did batman say to Robin before they got in the car? Get in the car.

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Your sister's feet smell so bad people encourage her to go home and wash them.

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What do you call the black guy with a gun a ski mask on? Tyrone, because thats his name.

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So, I walked into my friends house and MAH DEDDEHS DECK was outside bruh

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At least now we know, that most people are not like that, and with that sentence, my desire to see humanity as a whole happy, is dead. Thank you, you have made me realize that for each and every thing positive I have found within myself, I believed that I was simply learning more about how to be an average human being. I admire you, yet as painful it feels not to deny the truth, much of what I admire within you, reminds me of my self. Share that money with me, but as a gift, not as a contract, as a friend, not as someone buying me out, because my values might not be much, but for now, its what remains of the world I sought to create. Let us speak some other time, It was nice meeting you again Red, you always dig your way into my core, where I discover that I am stuck in life because I still sad deep inside, and then you take some of that sadness away.

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You're momma's so fat, Oh wait. She's not.

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Roses are red, violetes are blue, Your monkey sucks.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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