Person 1 - Have you heard about the movie about constipation? Person 2 - No. Person 1 - It hasn't come out yet

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Why doesnt Mexico have a navy? Because cardboard doesnt float.

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Did you hear the one about the spoon and the dis running away while the cow jumped over the moon, IMPOSSIBLE! eating material such as the spoon and dish are inanimate objects, and cows cant jump for they weigh from 600 to 1000 lbs.

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what did the tree say to the person? nothing trees cant talk

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Q: What is the answer to 255 x 23? A: A number!

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Why did the chicken cross the road? I really hate poultry related jokes.

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Gawds Trololols: Jewsus: I die for ur Sins, now u are free! *argh* Gawd AD 3000: TIME TO DIE SINNERS! Jewsus: But I paid for humanity`s sins and am stuck in hell because of this and... Gawd: Meh just didnt really liek you TROLOLOL! Gawds Trololols 2 directors clit: Gawd: Jebus! (the third) I want you to trololol peeps now! GO! Jebus: As you see people, I have died for you in order to prove that I am immortal! Peeps: Uh, wow? Jebus: TROLOLOL! So dad, when am I gonna get back to earth again, I kinda promised my boyfriends/apostles that there would be a second cumming as you told me to do, and people have been waiting for over twothousand and fourtee... Gawd: Never! Trolololol! Moral: "Would you trust a being whose veins are loaded with alcohol?" Jesus 2: The second coming: In cincemas never!

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Why did Silly Billy throw a clock out the window? Because he has a serious anger problem.

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What did Sally get on her 18th birthday? Herpes

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"I love you terribly!" said the girl to her new boyfriend. "I'm your dog. Please stop having sex with me on Chatubate."

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why were the girls confused? they were in a logic class and couldn't seem to find the irrationality chapter in the book

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What did the transvestite hooker say when he/she saw a robot fighting a dinosaur? That's strange.

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My friend came in the barber's shop and asked me to cut his hair for him, i always have rude banter with him and i made a joke about his big bate nose. He acused me of calling him Jewish and threatened to sue me. This is how i found out that he was a white supremisist.

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Knock Knock. Who's there? The pizza guy. Your pizza's here.

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why was the little boy crying? He had dead mice shoved up his asshole.

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Reduce, reuse, recycle Anti-joke.com

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girl says..joe..................................................................... boy says...who is joe................. girl..the idiot of a helper at my skl

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Roses are red, Violets are microwaves, I have amnesia, Roses are red.

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One day 2 people were gonna fight after school and the final bell wrung then they started the mtch and the challenger says, "Hey whats the one thing that you say when you don't want to fight and ypu let the other person win?" The other guy says, "I give up?" Then the challenger says, " I WIN!!!"

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Why couldn't a little kid turn around in a hall? He has a spear in his back.

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What did the black kid get for Christmas? Your bike.

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What's pink and smells like a red rose? A pink rose.

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Six Jews get on a train. They all safely arrive at their locations.

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Why did the British boy win his talent show? Because he had straight teeth

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

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The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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