What did the man on the moon say? ...Im on the moon.

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What did the Po-Po do to the speeding Mexican? Gave him a ticket.

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Why do teens say "dude?" They feel unloved at home and must know that they posses a strong relationship with their peers, and in fact, cannot maintain a proper friendship due to the four letter word known as "dude."

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A hundred dollar bill falls in the middle of an intersection. Equally distanced from the bill stand a Jew, a Black, a White Supremacist and an Arab. Wouldn't it suck to be on this street? I am sure violence will ensue. Wouldn't want to be caught in the crossfire.

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Why did the cookie go to the hospital? It had cancer.

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what shoes do pedafiles wear White vans

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I saw a number three walking past me in the street the other day and I thought to my self that's odd.

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Q: A blonde, a red-head, and a brunette all jump off the bridge at the same time. Who hits the ground first? A: As stated by Sir Isaac Newton's third law of gravitation, all three fall to their deaths at the exact same time because the velocity of a falling object is unaffected by the mass of that object... or their hair colour. Idiot.

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A man walks into a bar. He then walks out of the bar a while after. He then goes home and goes to bed. And then he goes to sleep. And then in an odd time travel paradox,a T-Rex arrives from the past and kills him and his entire family.

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Why was the women's underwear red?... Because she got stabbed.

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What did George Washington say to his men before they got on a boat? Men, get on the boat

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There's two muffins in an oven, the first muffin says "Woah, it's really hot in here!". The second muffin says "Oh my God! A talking muffin!"

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What is worse then a worm in your apple? 2 worms in your apple.

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What is worse than getting a cold ? Finding a dead baby in your mailbox

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Santa Clogged my toliet

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Why does Polly want a cracker? Because meth is too intense.

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Two Scientologists walk into a bar. For $5,000 you can hear the rest of this joke.

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What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? Finding two worms.

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Have you seen the Hobbit? Yes they're taking him to Isengard

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whats the difference between a mexican and a bench? a mexican has elbows.

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knock knock whos there boo boo who? stop crying its only me! its not you, my mom has cancer, my dad was killed in a car accident, my pregnant wife has been murdered, and my uncle touches me.

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Q: Whats the difference between a blonde and a mosquito? A: One stops sucking when you slap it.

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What does a duck have in common? The further it flies the more.

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Why did Piglet look in the toilet? He was probably fascinated by the flush.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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