Whats worse than an offended chicken walking around with a squirrel stapled to its back? A crusty old man with hepatitis peeing on 10 babies.

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What do you get when you cross a lamb and a pigeon? You get your house taken away.

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knock knock who's there? Dave Dave who? Dave proceeds to break into tears as his grandmother's alzheimers has progressed to the point where she no longer remembers him.

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What starts with "p" and ends with "orn" Popcorn

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4 on three... 1, 2, 3, 4!

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Why did the boy lose the race? Because he is morbidly obese.

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A little boy and a pedafile are walking through the forest at night. The little boy says "I'm scared." The pedafile says "You're scared? I have to walk home alone."

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knock knock knocking on heavens douoor

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what do u call a black guys dick a pogo stick

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Why did Suzy fall of the swing? She didn't have arms. Knock knock. Who's there? Not Suzy.

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what did say when he created the first black Wow you are the first non-white I made

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What did the fish say when he ran into a wall? Nothing because saying a fish can talk is like saying Obama is a good president.

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Go figure, you seemed pretty fucking scared of me back then. "autocast" hypnotic priming, anchors, you know what that is right? You for (as an example) clap your hands whenever you succeed at hypnotizing yourself while staying awake in a lucid state, then you repeat it until you one day just clap, your body remembers the whole sequence and boom it works right away. You did not think that PaulMcKenna could just touch people and have them do what he wants without even telling them what to do right? Especially not McKenna, I learned a lot from Richard Bandler, absolutely nothing from Anthony Robbins, everything I could ever want from Igor Ledochowsky, and absolutely nothing from PaulMcKenna, I went to him last, I should have skipped Both Robbins and Kenna, they use NLP and... Basically call it hypnosis.

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What do an elephant and grapes have in common? They both have a trunk...except for the grapes

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I am white, asian and black... What am I? A panda

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Goon Bear+Homo= Corey Jacobs True Story

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What happens when you give a math problem to a blonde? She works through it to arrive at the answer.

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What's the difference between a duck? One of its feet are both the same.

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You wanna know what's totally out of this world? The moon.

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Q:Way C'nt U reed tHis? A: Because im retarted -ian surprenant

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You know what's a real drag? A club foot

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how do you make a plumber cry kill his family

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why did the chicken cross the road. why? because he felt like it

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Continents are large islands.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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