What do you call a blonde on the Moon? That depends on what her name is.

Q: What do you call a bathtub? A: A bathtub

Dylan Eichas

Q. What did the man with no heart say? A. Nothing. No living creature can live without a heart.

Why was grandma lying on the floor? She just died of lung cancer.

Why did the koala fall out of the tree? It died

What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? An apple up your ass, a penis in your ramen, finding out you have herpes, or many other scenarios. In short, there are many things worse than finding a worm in your apple.

I enjoy the fact that the jokes I post that do not make me laugh, are the ones that get zero thumbs, while those that at least make me smile, get at least a couple, I admit thought that its hard to keep track with me, I type jokes so fast that they disappear in the back before people can thumb them... Have you heard... Of the dog that was barking up the wrong three? The three said: Damn dog! I am not a tree! The dog kept barking, as dogs do not speak. Moral: Numbers speak fluently in most languages though...

What happened to the village that got swept by a tsunami? It was destroyed.

Knock, knock. Who's there? Chris Hanson with To Catch A Predator.

Why was Newton surprised when the apple fell on his head? Because he was sitting under a pear tree.

Teacher: What's 2x2 John? John: (ignores teacher) Teacher: John! John: huh? Teacher: go on John: uh? 24?

i'm here at a school my friend is eats a pool fuck yeh

How do you get a one-armed Polak out of a tree? Get him a ladder and help him down.

Wanna hear a bathroom joke? YOU TRYIN' TO KILL US?!?

47

What did the blind man say to the deaf man? -Nothing, he doesn't know sign language.

What's the difference between a duck?

What can hurt you if you pee on it? A rabid grizzly bear

Knock-Knock Who's there? We are, now open the door! Wait im masturbating!!

What's 1+1? 69.

What do you call a black man chasing after a macdonalds van? The fastest thing in the dessert.

What's one very bad way to injure yourself? Smashing your head against a metal surface

What's gay and ugly? An ugly gay.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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