Roses are red, Violets are blue, This poem's cool. I ran over your dog.

thumb_up thumb_down +25

Why am I losing my time writing this joke even knowing that I will get lots of thumbs down?

thumb_up thumb_down -30

Seven monkeys jumping on the bed. One fell off and broke its head! Momma called the doctor, And the doctor said, "I'm sorry, Mrs.Monkey, but your son has suffered a severe concussion, and will be very mentally impaired for the rest of his life."

thumb_up thumb_down +48

How do you fit four gay men on a bar stool? You build an exceptionally large bar stool

thumb_up thumb_down +18

Roses are red. Voilets are blue I'm Morgan Freeman and I CAN SMELL YOU...

thumb_up thumb_down -29

wanna here an anti joke scroll down

thumb_up thumb_down +14

Roses are red. Violets are red. Tulips are red. My garden is on fire.

thumb_up thumb_down +47

What did the fat man eat for breakfast? Nothing, he died of heart failure in the night.

thumb_up thumb_down +6

A man trips on an old bottle. He picks it up and out pops a genie. "I will grant you three wishes!" says the genie. "Whatever you so desire is my com--" "I'm already late for a meeting!" shouts the man. He drops the bottle and continues on.

thumb_up thumb_down -17

Your momma's so not fat that when a school bus rolled by here house, she just sat there and turned on oprah.

thumb_up thumb_down -21

What did the man with cancer get for his birthday? A gravestone.

thumb_up thumb_down -20

Quaint? Oh yeah? YOU ARE QUAINT! No seriously, whats that word all about.

thumb_up thumb_down -9

A boy spelled the word "banana" wrong on a spelling test... Points were deducted.

thumb_up thumb_down -27

Shiiit the halls with chunks of feces! Fa-la-la-la-la lala-lala! Taken from all sorts of species! Fa-la-la-la-la lala-lala! Bengal tiger, kangaroo, African elephant, blue whale too! Shit the halls with chunks of feces! Fa-la-la-la-lala-lala!

thumb_up thumb_down +3

A man goes to the doctor. The doctor says: both your legs are broken in 10 places, you will never walk again.

thumb_up thumb_down +44

Q:Whats worse than stubbing your toe? A: Watching a terrorist saw your dads arm off.

thumb_up thumb_down +2

Q:Why is rugby one of the safest sports to play? A: It isn't , it is in fact very dangerous.

thumb_up thumb_down -4

why do black people like to play basketball steal shoot and run

thumb_up thumb_down +36

What did batman say to robin to get in the car? Get in the car.

thumb_up thumb_down -34

What did the white guy say to the Mexican when he entered the US? How was your flight?

thumb_up thumb_down +147

A man and a woman are having sex. The man finishes and says, "Oh, God, I hope you're on the pill." The girl says she isn't and begins to cry. Lacking a job or a stable life, the man leaves the woman. The woman has an abortion and suffers irreversible damage to her ovaries.

thumb_up thumb_down -11

What do you call two Ethiopians standing side-by-side? Friends

thumb_up thumb_down +61

Nice belt.

thumb_up thumb_down +7

Whats worse than finding a worm in your apple? Playing hide and seek with Dennis Ferguson

thumb_up thumb_down +15

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops