A woman goes into the supermarket and buys a single banana, a canned meal for one and some ice cream. While paying for her items, the cashier looks up at her and says "I can tell you're single" "Oh yeah? How'd you know?" The woman asks. "Because you're ugly as fuck." Replies the cashier.

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roses are blue viloets are red this poem doesnt make sense microwave

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"knock knock" "Come in"

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What did the sad orphan with liver cancer get for Christmas? Pictures of dead babies to put things in perspective.

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Why do ducks fly south for the winter? because its to far to waddle

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Why does Timmy Teblow love penis? Logan Cole made him do it.

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Yor Mama is soooooooooooo fat, when she looked in da mirror... it cracked.

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I had a date. She was a pegasister. Since MLP was magical, I disappeared.

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Why was the girl crying? She got shot in the penis

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what did the black guy ge for christmas? a speeding ticket

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What's do you call two bulls, a goat, and a horse? Farm A nimals

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Anti jokes SUCK!

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A recently widowed blond was on her way to an appointment with her attractive physician, when she realized that she was almost out of gas, so she stopped to refuel at a station near his office.

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A man sees a clown, a robot, and a monkey walking down the street side by side. The man ponders the randomness of life.

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Q. What's long and hard and full of seamen? A. A penis. Oops, I misspelled "semen". Sorry. Also, to clarify, this doesn't describe the normal state of the average penis. Usually they are flaccid, and they can only be said to be "full of semen" at the exact moment of ejaculation.

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Why did the pied piper eat tea half past three? Because the chicken tripped on the way across the street and the fat lady didn't sing.

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There once was a man from Nantucket But then he moved to Boston and changes his name to "man from Boston"

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Why didn't the chef serve the black guy his food? Because he wasn't a waitor.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? It's really irrelevant when you realize this joke is about a suicidal chicken...

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your momma eats so much ice cream, you often find yourself without anything sweet to eat late at night when you're hungry

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A: Ask me if I am an Orange. B: "Are you an Orange?" A: No.

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have you ever noticed that when geese are flying in a V, that one side is longer? Do you know why? no...why? There is more on one side

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Why was the boy sad? Because his family was raped and stripped of their possessions

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What did Chuck Norris say when he saw a cop -Hi

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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