Why did the girl fall off the swing? Because she didn't have any arms

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Q: Why was the child sad? A: because a doctor was taking bullet fragments out of his chest.

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How do you like them apples I dont like aplles

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What has 156 bras and 927 pairs of underwear? Someone without a washing machine.

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Whatever doesn't kill you makes you stronger. Except for the cases when you die...then you are dead.

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What did the one bagpiper say to the other? Nothing, one cannot speak while playing the bagpipes.

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, I have five fingers, The middle one's for you.

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What is big, red, and eats rocks? A big red rock eater,

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why did the kid strike out in baseball he had leprosy and his arms were amputated

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Hey Lady Gaga, Madonna called, she wants her clothes back; she lend them to you weeks ago for a concert because you didn't have anything to wear and you haven't returned them yet.

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Why did the stoner visit anti-joke.com? Because he was bored, and probably kinda high.

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Hey I just met you you are a sneaker smell my gym socks and then pick oot throughyour nose

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One day, 2 people were gonna fight after school and the final bell wrung then they started the mtch and the challenger says, "Hey whats the one thing that you say when you don't want to fight and ypu let the other person win?" The other guy says, "I give up?" Then the challenger says, " I WIN!!!"

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How do you leave a gay guy in suspense? How? ......................

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Roses are red Violets are blue Actually, no they're not. They're VIOLET. That's why they're called that. If they were blue, they would be called "Blues", or something of a similar nature. Don't be dumb.

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? Because I shot him. Why did the other monkey fall out of the tree? Because his tail was stapled to the other monkey.

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree?? It got shot Why did the 2nd monkey fall out of the tree? It was stapled to the first monkey

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I wear my sunglasses at night. I'm always getting into car accidents.

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Why did the man get go to sleep? He got hit in the face with a hammer.

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A rabi and a priest go out for a coffee they talk for a while and go on there way

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Quick its the weed hide the cops! ... wait...

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obama

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Two muffings are in an oven. One leans towards the other due to rising of the batter and says nothing. The other cupcake, unable to yield the cognitive process to speak utters nothing and cooks to an internal temperature of 175 C.

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What's green, three feet tall, and can live forever? Definitely not Julie Andrews.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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