Friends are like potatoes. If you eat them they die.

How do you make a dead baby float? Two scoops of vanilla ice cream and two scoops of dead baby.

what did the asian father say to his son after seeing he got a B- in math? "There's small room for improvement but overall you did a great job son."

Why did the little girl lose her necklace? Because she got her head blown off

What did the prisoner say to the man who posted his bail? Thank you.

What did one cannibal say to the other while they were eating a clown? I don't know... That action was so barbarous that it freaked me out, and I was no longer in the vicinity of the area. Since I don't have supersonic hearing, I couldn't pick up anything they were saying...

I rode in to town on an ass... ur momas ass!!

if dragonflies have purple toe nails, then how many pancakes does it take to build a doghouse? canada, because snakes don't have armpits!

What did it say in the end of the book? The End.

Knock knock Who's there? Doctor Doctor who? Good guess!

im black

What happens when you shoot a black man? You go to prison because murder is a criminal offense.

There was a bunch of kids on a bus. One boy yelled "Look a squirrel!" Nobody saw it because he's dyslexic

Why couldn't the man sleep? Because he was a wax model in a museum, and as we all know wax models are inanimate objects thus incapable of consciousness and therefore incapable of unconsciousness as well. Many other inanimate objects are caught up in similar problems relating to their incapability to do anything.

Why was the black man in Jail? He works there as a correctional officer.

What did the single woman get for Christmas? Raped.

What do you call a donkey that can't speak? Whatever you want to call it...I prefer to call it a donkey that can't speak!

What's the difference between a truck full of bowling balls and a truck full of babies? One's used for bowling and the other's just sad.

Why did the deer die Because Jupiter is incapable of supporting life

What did the collage professor say to the plumber? Hi.

What's worse than getting sockson your birthday? Getting cancer on your birthday.

Q: Why did the black guy cross the road? A: Hell, I don't know. He probably stole something.

Yo mama is so fat that her dietician often recommends that she decrease her calorie intake and exercise more often to avoid risk of diabetes or potentially a stroke.

If the opposite of Pro is Con, whats the opposite of progress?

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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