Blarg

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An apple a day keeps the doctor away. Unless he's a witch doctor, then you'll need an apple and some ayaheusca. The fractal dream will destroy time and space as consciousness returns upon itself at times end

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, I don't have cancer, but you do. Love, your doctor.

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Why did Suzie fall out of her swing? Because she had no arms.

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KNOCK KNOCK who's there? OUCH! what's your door knob made of? nails?

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Do you still got what it needs to become a better leader than me Nero?

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What do bicycles and platypus have in common? They both have wheels, except the platypus doesn't.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? I don't know. Chickens like to wander around.

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Why did Samuel drive his car into a tree? Because the tree was being a total jerk, blocking the road.

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Q:Why was the frog sad A:He was stapeld to a boys face.

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Why cant African children read? While there are many contributing factors the largest would probably be the lack of a standardized education system mainly due to the logistical factors involved in reaching so many wide spread communities. Also the current economic climate and general disregard for civilians by the governments in these area would suggest that the states' focus would be on other issues besides the welfare of their citizens. Then again, not really being educated on this issue in almost any way, has probably contributed to a broad generalization, and so the premise of this joke is most likely flawed in any case.

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why did you poop because you are a poop

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There's a pile of dead babies with one live baby on the bottem eating it's way out.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? The cognitive capacity of the chicken is significantly underdeveloped in comparison to humans; thus, comprehending a chicken's motives is impossible. Furthermore, interspecies communication is largely understudied - a mysterious division of science that may never be fully revealed. Therefore, one could safely theorize that no single human could breach this gap in communication differences (assuming chickens do, in fact, communicate) and in turn, could not understand the chicken's reasoning behind its choice to cross the road (excluding the possibility of psychic connections between chickens and humans [see 'Dog Whisperer' for a more clear explanation on interspecial psychic relations]) That being said, the only scientific and logical way one could understand the aforementioned question is through observation. For example, perhaps food was located on the other side of the road. However, this seems to pose a plethora of other questions: Why was the chicken near a road and not in a coop stocked with adequate food? Was this a wild chicken? Are there wild chickens? Do wild chickens often cross roads? Are wild chickens dangerous? If so, why hasn't there been warnings about dangerous, wild chickens crossing roads? The answer to these questions may never be discovered or explained.

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An Englishman walks into a bar.

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A blonde, a redhead, and a brunette are on a cruise together. A horrifying accident occurs, sinking the boat and killing all of them. Their deaths are mourned by their respective family members.

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A young girl falls off a swing, she is paralysed from the neck down and unable to walk every agian.

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What's worse than having an ugly face? Having a face like yours.

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Your so ugly That when you look into a mirror it shows an accurate potrail of your unproportionit face

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How do you keep a black guy out of your backyard? You tell him "STAY OUT"

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If your uncle jack helped you off your horse, would you help your uncle jack off a horse? Yes

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If you were on an island with one wish what would you wish for? To get off the island

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Why was 6 afraid of 7? To get to the other side.

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What did the black man say to the jewish man? Hello.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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