Whats the difference between a Jew and a Pig? One makes bacon when smoked.

Why did Sally fall off the swing? Because she had no arms or legs. Knock knock? Whos there? Not Sally. What did Sally get for Christmas? Cancer.

How do you call blond girl with no arms and no legs ? A victim of a tragic car accident.

There once was a man from Madrass Whose balls were made out of brass This was incredibly uncomfortable and embarrassing for him. It also affected his sexual potency and rendered him infertile, Which drastically affected his ability to enter and sustain relationships with women.

Three bears take a bath Red bear asks for the shampoo Blue bear wants the soap Wait... That's not a joke, that's a Haiku

What did the blind man do in the dark room? Nothing, he couldn't see.

A blond and a redhead are walking down the street the red head says look a dead bird the blond looks up

Fags are gay.

A Quadriplegic walked into a bar,

What's the difference between a Jew and a canoe? One is a type of small aquatic craft, and the other is a human being who practices Judaism.

Whats the same between a baby and pizza? their both edible

So a disabled man walks into a bar...

Which of the following is the biggest? A. 7 B. 17 C. 71 D. Yo mama

Did you hear the one about the man who went into the jungle wearing nothing but leopard print underwear? He was suffering from psychogenic fugue disorder and had no idea who or where he was. He was eventually eaten alive by a flesh-eating centipede. When his wife found out, she committed suicide.

What do you call putting a toad in the microwave? Animal cruelty.

If there's somethin' strange in your neighborhood Who ya gonna call 911

What looks like a jew, smells like a jew, but claims he isn't jewish? Fletcher Phillips

why couldnt hellen keller drive? cuz she was blind

Only steers and queers come from Texas and i dont see any horns on you so what does that mean? It means I am not a Minotaur.

Why did the chicken cross the road? Because the chicken was trying to escape from the sad and depressing environment that surrounded him on the side he thus came from. Alas, he did not know that he would be soon hit by a drunk truck driver, who would also die, in a bright explosion of morbid flames and screams.

Roses are Red, Violets are Blue. Vodka is cheaper than dinner for two.

How do you get your dog to stop peeing on the floor? SHOOT IT!!!

Why did the chicken cross the road? It didn’t get to cross the road. Halfway through the crossing, it was hit by a car and turned into roadkill. Then a family of black people picked it up and turned it into fried chicken.

What did the baby say to the banana? -- "mama!"

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...