What starts with "F" and ends in "uck" Firetruck.

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Why did the boy cross the road? He was visiting his dying grandmother at the hospital.

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Why was the Jewish boy afraid of an oven? The last oven malfunctioned and killed his father.

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What's pink and fluffy? A feather duster.

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what do you get when you cross a giraffe and an octopus an abomination

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Why did the man fall off of his bike? Because he is a Sikh who was mistaken for a muslim after the events of 9/11. His neighbors for 5 years have turned on him and now are throwing rocks at him to alleviate their anger while he is biking to his minimum wage job as a janitor at the local burger king, trying to make money for a family that doesn't love him anymore

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I have magical powers. Try your best to not to follow these instructions: Ready? Go. You are now blinking your eyes. (strike 1) You are now breathing voluntary. (strike 2) You suddenly have an itch somewhere on your body. (strike 3) You lost. Thanks for playing my little game. Hope you enjoy thinking of a flying pink elephant with wings.

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What do you call putting a vehicle on the side of the road? Parking.

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What do you call a snail driving a boat? An accident waiting to happen.

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, I'm gonna screw you and you don't have a clue !

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Whats worse than losing your entire family in a car accident? Luikimia

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Knock Knock Dude i am not going to answer the door

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Knock, knock. Who's there? I am.

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whats purple and savage? Barney!

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What's the difference between a ball and a bouncy ball? A bouncy ball is bouncy.

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What did one eye say to the other? Nothing. Because eye's can't talk.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because chicken brains are not as large or developed as human brains, therefore preventing the chicken from making a logical decision, leading to it crossing a road with heavy traffic and eventually being run over by a semi.

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why is a squirrel called a squirrel? that's its name.

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Why does Michael J. Fox make a great milkshake? Because he's had a successful career where he has made a substantial amount of money, allowing him to purchase high quality ingredients.

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so...um, yeah

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a little boy told his friend he failed a test.. the friend replied that his parents r goin to kill him... to save himself the suffering ...the boy hung himself in his closet

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John has 38 candy bars. He eats 28. What does he have now? Diabetes. John has Diabetes.

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Homework.

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The jinx machine just stole your money... ... this poem was supposed to be funny

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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