what did luke say to darth vader? Can i borrow ur car please.

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Roses are dead Violets are dead Im a bad gardener

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Her Majesty's Government of the United Kingdom of Great Britain

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how many birds did chuck norris kill with one stone? one.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? To get to KFC and join his chicken friends to protest.

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knock knock There's no door

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What's the difference between a pizza and a baby? I don't stab pizza 47 times in the chest with a chainsaw.

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Why? Because!

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what is the difference between my pubes and my actualy hair on my head.... my pubes didnt fall off when i went trough chemo

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Question: What is worse then a worm in your apple? Answer: A number of different things I would imagine...

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Did you know that... Billy had a heart attack, it was sad. Now you know!

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Why was the woman in the kitchen? She came in to give her husband, who was washing the dishes, a kiss before she went to bed early so she could be well rested and get up on time to make the 45 minute commute to the hospital where she worked as a neurosurgeon the next morning.

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a fat black man walks into an aquarium he was quickly shot down because he was mistaken for a whale.

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your mamma so fat... she went to hell.

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What can an elevator do that a mexican can't? Raise a family.

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why does Chuck Norris never get wet in the rain? Because he has a very serviceable umbrella

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What do you call a boy with no arms and no legs in the water? Bob What do you call that same kid when he's at your doorstep? Matt What do you call that same kid when he's hanging in your room? I don't know, but you should stop calling him names.

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wat does say to another bird....... chirp chirp

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What's worse than seeing your goldfish die? Watching your grandfather have a stroke.

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What do you call a fish that isn't moving? Dead.

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The man was so nice It's too bad he couldn't hear the bus coming.

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Why are there so many black men in the NBA? Because they trained hard and practiced regularly to get there..

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theres a fork in a drawer half way open and a knife in a cup on the counter. how does the knife get into the drawer, it cant knife are incapable of moving

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Whats worse than pulling down a girls pants and seeing a giant furry bush... finding out her vagina has teeth in it.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops