Q: why was the cat naked? A: its owner was drunk and thought he was shaving his own head.

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Why did the Jew run across the road? To get to the other side.

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Why did? Yes

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a blond was walking across a river thinking how do I get across. when she saw another blond. and asked how do I get to the other side and the other said your already on the other side.

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What do you get when you mix a turtle and a dog An animal

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Why did the guy kill his friends? He didn't, he doesn't have any friends

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What do you call a black man with a job? An employee

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What's green and blue that is shaped like the earth? The earth

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Bear walks into bar and says to eagle may I have a................... drink eagle says why the long pause hohahahohahahohaha

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What do you say to jacks mum when your having Sex? Nothing she's dead.

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Out on the playground of a school, extremely young kids are acting as living witness to an audacious thing. They're watching a very interesting display of strength and brutality. They're observing a enactment of lofty potential and great might. What're they watching? They're regarding their principal getting promptly arrested by the federal police for possession of technically illegal weaponry including, but not only limited to what looked like to them: peculiar "fire crackers" and reloadable "candy dispensers". In the ensuing battle, their principal got shot in the arm and a random pedestrian got killed by a stray bullet. In the end, the cruel joke's on them. Guess what? They're irrepairably damaged for the rest of their life.

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Why did the little boy die? Because he had cancer.

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How do you stop a baby from falling into a manhole? You catch it, and then call the appropriate services and inform them of the dangerous open manhole.

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how are a plum and a rabbit the same? they are both purple except the rabbit

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Where did the guy who shot his neighbor go? Jail, because he was caught, sent to court, and was convicted of murder.

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A blonde goes in an electronic store. She buys a TV and leaves.

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, I have no idea how to rhyme, I like tacos

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An Indian child is born with three arms. After being ridiculed his whole life he kills himself at age 19.

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the other day i saw a mouse run across my floor. i said "okay" and proceeded with my life

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dick dick dick... frogs

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What do u call a black guy with a gun? A police officer u racist bastard

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What do you call a black guy who gives out change? A cashier.

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Why did the Asian crash her car? Someone shit on her windsheild.

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What did the toaster say to the bread? Nothing. Toasters can't talk.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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