A man enters a bar, and says: "It is impossible to drown in an elevator" This is incorrect.

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In a stranded island, a plane crashes. Only one man survives. He asks himself "Where do I bury everybody else?" The others proceed to look at him strangely. He was the only surviving male.

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WHAT DYEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE MEAN YE DON'T KNOWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWW?

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Why did Jim laugh so hard? Triangle!

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What kind of Mexican makes no money? A Mexican without a job.

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What do a banana and helicopter have in common? Neither is a police officer

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Why did the girl fall off the swing? Because she had no arms.

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I wonder what mute people say to themselves. :/

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Who took the last can of soda? I dunno.

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Why did the girl fall off the swing? Because she didn't have any arms

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After eating dinner, my dad said... "That was really good."

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If i could re-arrange the alphabet i'd put my sausage in your oven

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Your mum's so fat, she attends regular weight loss facilities to lose weight.

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What's worse than a baby dying of AIDS? It depends upon one's frame of reference. A family living in the US might consider the death of a baby by AIDS a horrible act by the gods. But to a similar family in sub-Saharan Africa, this might be a regular, albeit tragic occurrence.

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roses are red violets are blue i have Downs Syndrome... and a ding-dong potato

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Why do women like NASCAR? They don't.

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Roses are red, Violets are red, I'm bleeding, Shit.

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What did the little girl get for christmas? her first period

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why did the black boy start crying when he was taking a dump? He thought he was melting

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Eating a bagel, the man was overcome with disappointment, he thought that he had purchased a donut. He later hung himself.

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There once was an old lady who lived in shoe. She had so many children, her uterus fell out.

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Why did little Sally fall off the swing? Because Sally has no arms. Knock knock! Who's there? Not Sally.

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Roses are Red Violets are dog I'm Senile Flower tastes like frog.

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A:Whats the air speed velocity of a swallow? B:What an african or English swallow? A:Well I don't know that.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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