a man decided to climb a tree. he got to the top,raised his arms above his head and said "I am on top of the world ". after that he fell because he was not holding on to anything

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when chuck norris plays call of duty, his only perk is ghost pro.

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why did the parakeet eat the cracker? because it wanted to.

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How do you stop an alcoholic from drinking ? You leave him in the desert for 4 days, eventually he'll die from dehydration .

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what did the farmer say when he lost his tractor? A: Wheres my tractor?

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Why did the chicken cross the road? It didn't. Chickens live on farms.

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How do you get a clown off a swing? Wait your turn patiently.

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if you are what you eat then you're a hamburger

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How does an electrician install an outlet? I don't know. I'm not an electrician.t

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Why couldn't Helen Keller drive? Because she was a woman.

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A chicken and a triceratops walk into a bar. They both immediately recognize each other and start trading anti-jokes, of which no one else in the bar understood, for they are animals, and animals cannot speak. Which brings up the question of how the triceratops and the chicken would communicate in any way that was conversely accurate to how humans would make jokes. Also adding in the fact that they are both from different eras of time, and the people wonder why a triceratops is walking around when they are in fact extinct. Turns out, the triceratops was an animatronic that gained sentience and ran off the set of Jurassic Park IV, a movie production that was not yet announced, as Steven Spielberg was still working on other movies that were more important at the time. The chicken flew in here because he heard the bar was close-by to where he worked, so he decided to drop by after a long Friday. The bartender finally walks up and asks the triceratops, "What would you like?" The triceratops then went on a rampage and killed everyone inside because he was an alcoholic and lost his family because of it, since his ex-wife would be worked to the bone trying to raise his 2 children and adopted platypus son David. He lost everything in the divorce. Why was he in a bar then? I don't know, I can't talk to dinosaurs. The chicken then befriended the triceratops, as the chicken was a secret anarchist who sought to bring down all the stores on the street, as his mother was killed there while trying to cross the street. She fell into a manhole. The chicken and the triceratops then traded usernames on League of Legends then played out that Friday teaming up and taking down Evil. How do they play League if they're animals? Because this whole story is made up and you wasted a good 2-3 minutes trying to read this.

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How do you make Justin Bieber handsome? He already is!

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what happened to the girl next door ? she was brutally murdered.

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goats are like mushrooms, if you shoot a duck, im scared of toasters

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Roses are red Violets are blue Sugar is sweet You have pancreatic cancer

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Obama is a good president.

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YOUR MUM!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

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Yo momma's so fat that she's gotta get a special door that will allow her to get through.

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What do you call a dog with no legs? It doesn't matter, he can't come anyway.

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I'm pretty sure this site has been taken over by 12 year olds... None of these are funny

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knock knock. Who's There? Cancer.

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Why do black people eat fried chicken? Because they're humans and many humans enjoy the savory taste of fried chicken.

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Why was the kid dizzy? He ran in a circle repeatedly.

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Q: What did the giraffe say to the sunflower? A: I like your shoelaces!

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops