Q - what did one plate say to the other? A - FOods on me tonight!

Why was there a lion in the bathroom? Because I threw a refrigerator at it and stapled a frog to its butthole, all while it was being chased by a 10 foot scorpion and a purple salmon that only had 1 eye.

You're mom is so black... that she is most likely of African Descent

What does the Post Office have in common with a shoe store? Both provide goods and services in exchange for money.

roses are blue violetrs are green im shooting heroine into my head

How does Moses make his Tea? Hebrews it.

the midget went to the midget store

Whats the difference between Justin bieber and a dick... The dick

Humpty dumpty sat on a wall. Humpty dumpty had a big fall. All the king's horses and all the king's men did not come to help him because the United States does not have a patriarchal system of government.

Ask me if I'm a Banana Are you a Banana? Yes Oh, I couldn't tell in this lighting

What's worse than the Holocaust? Finding half a worm in your apple.

World Of Warcraft

Why did the plane crash? The pilot was a loaf of bread.

An Asian girl is playing with a rubber band. She accidentally slings it into her eye, cries, and receives immediate attention from her mother.

What is the difference between my right hand and my left hand? I used my right hand to stab your mother.

What did the boy who got picked on everyday do? He took the bullies advice and killed himself.

Humpty Dumpty didn't fall I pushed him

Someone with a lame joke: What's black and white and red all over? Smart person who decides to mess with him: Nothing, if it is red all over how can it be black and white???????

whats worse than having cancer? nothing you have cancer and should proceed to see doctor

A blonde and a brunette were hanging onto the edge of a cliff for dear life. The brunette somehow found the strength to climb back up. The blonde was impressed, but had muscular dystrophy so she slipped and fell to her death.

Suzy:I love you like a fat man love cake. Dave:(proceeds to say nothing as he is fat and is buzzy eating cake)

If a tree falls in the woods, and no one is around to hear it - Is there still a woman in the kitchen?

Why did the little girl not speak? It was Anne Frank

Why didn't the giraffe go to the zoo party? He didn't receive an invitation.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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