two peanuts walked into a bar they both sat down and immediately left once they found out the bar was serving peanuts.

Hi, my name is Jake.

Whats 89 x 67? Sponge. Whats 10 + 9? 19 Whats 9 + 10? 21!

Did I tell you about the day I put PaulMckenna on a hypnotic state so he believed he put me in a trance? That was fun, everybody applauded, then he got sad when it was not him they where applauding at, funny guy, a bit of an amateur, he spends hours "priming" people in a hypnotic state, and then in his videos triggers it so it makes it seem like he does it instantly, next to Igor Ledohowsky and Richard Bandler, I might just be one of the best and youngest hypnotists alive. Speaking of which, my wife knows the complicated yet strong feelings I got for you, and feels safe around me because of the same reasons you do, and the fact that I can spot a worry and a tear before people do, especially those I love and care about. Wait I am not done, I just need to eat before I space out.

A baby seal walks into a club.

Roses are Red, Violets are Blue, Obama is a good president, I beg to differ.

What did timmy fall off the swings? He had no arms

How did the girl get hit by a car? Better question, How did the car get in the kitchen?

Why did the redneck leave his wife? To marry his daughter.

What do you call a man who has committed more than 10 crimes? Whatever his name happens to be.

If a quiz is quizzical, what's a testicle?

if u have a problem with this then comment !!!!!!!!!!!

If I crash my car, how many trees does it take to cover my yard in orange juice, yellow, because a cat pissed on my foot.

THIS IS NOT SPARTA! *pulls him out of the hole*

Yo momma so thin, she admitted herself into an in-patient counseling center for anorexic and bulimic patients.

Large 4

girls basketball

What's red and looks like blue paper? Red paper

if you watched wife-swap years ago, you'll remember that one family that bought anything they could because they didnt have to pay till 12-21-12 because they thought the world would end LOL FUN FAMILY NOW HUH

An old man, and his daughter are walking down the street. They are having a nice time, until the daughter turns around to see the old man lying on the ground in pain because of the crippling arthritis in his back that has caused him agony and discomfort for years.

What's better than finding a worm in your apple? -The Holocaust

What's fat and ginger? My dog.

Shane Murchan is GAY ..... :L

What do you call something with no legs? A Cripple.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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