What's the difference between a Jew and a Boy Scout? Boy Scouts come home from camp.

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What did the German girl say to me? entschuldigen Sie (excuse me)

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How do you kill a blonde? The blonde you were planning on killing, Bridget, arrives home from a rather tiring run. She lets her hair down from her ponytail, and since it is rather long, it brushes against her round breasts. Even though she is a little sweaty, you realize what a beautiful woman she is, and you decide not to kill here. You instead ask her to marry you, and after she replies "yes", with tears of joy streaming down her face, you two make passionate love in the front seat of your 2011 Cadillac Escalade.

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Why did little Susie light herself on fire? Answer: She wanted to be warm

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Roses are red, violets are blue, they really should be purple.

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why did the blond sop at a red light? because it was red.

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Slow and steady wins the race, But only in some cases. Mostly never.

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Why did children rejoice when Michael Jackson died? Because they were at a birthday party, and only heard about his death afterward.

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What is worse than 20 babies stapled to trees? 1 baby stapled to 20 trees.

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Q: Whats the difference between a guitar and a piece of ham? A: You can eat a piece of ham.

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what do you call an ocelot with ebola? an ocelot that might die soon.

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Why did the woman start crying? She didn't have woman's rights... That's right, get back in the kitchen

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Why wasn't the black woman allowed on the bus? It was rush hour and the bus was full.

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What did God say when he made the first black person? I have just added a significant element of diversity to the human species. Intolerance between ethnicities will surely prove to be an obstacle in societal progression, creating hardships for many. I know this because I am God.

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Why do you always loose your keys at monster truck rally's? Most likely because they fell out during all the excitement of jumping up and down, but the real reason is because they are afraid of monster cars.

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Did you hear about the deer? He had antlers. If antlers where a kind of disease, that would be a pun.

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What's sad about a pile of dead people? They didn't have life insurance.

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What do you call a cat that plays football? Weird.

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Knock knock.

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what do you call a fish with no gills? I dont know what youd call that creature...but its no fish.

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i joined the nazis... but 2 days later i found out i am a jew

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Why did the girl fall off the swing? She had no arms.

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Roses are red Violets are tits I like tits Tits

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Q: What did Batman say to Robin when he noticed he had lost his belt? A: Robin! Q:What did Robin respond? A: Yes?

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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