A man goes to a gas station to pump gas in his car. After about 7 minutes, he leaves.

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http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=wioFUrwny1c

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What's worse than losing a basketball game by 1 point? Dying of lukemia.

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A muslim bought tickets for a 3pm flight. It was 11am, so in the mean time, he went to a bar to loosen up. His bomb vest accidently went off early, killing everyone in the bar. The flight arrived on-time in San Fransico.

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Why is minecraft so awesome? Because real life is boring as crap.

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How come Michael Jackson can draw a perfect circle? He likes little BOYS.

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Jackson's dad told him to "play in the traffic".

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What do you call a black priest? HOLY SHIT!!!!

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What do you call cheese that isn't yours? My cheese

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How do you make a drug dealer cry? Just say no

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What's poor and lives in Newry city council dump? Smelly mcD

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Bob: why didthe chicken cross the road? Tom: why? Bob: to get to your house Knock knock Tom: whos their Bob: the chicken

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Why did the cookie go to the doctor, beause he was feeling really crumby...becuase he has testicular cancer

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Q.What happens when you win a trophy? A. You don't, there is always someone better than you.

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Why did the Muslim cross the road? He was on fire and he needed to get to the lake on the other side of the street to put himself out.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Against city ordinates, an old woman was keeping chickens in her suburban back yard. One escaped, and there was no where else to go.

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Why are plants green? Plants are green due to the chloroplast organelles found in their cells. These membrane bound organelles are exclusive to plant cells and are used to convert sun light to usable chemical energy. This energy is stored in the form of ATP molecules, or adenosine triphosphate. When one of the three phosphate groups of an ATP molecule is removed, the molecule releases the energy put into this bond and becomes ADP, or adenosine diphosphate. Throughout this process, the organelle fulfills its sole function and at the same time gives plants their green color our eyes perceive today.

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If you are floating down main street in a canoe and your front right propeller falls off, how many pancakes can you fit in a doghouse? None, because ice cream doesn't have bones

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women's rights

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How many babies does it take to tile a roof? Depends how thinly you slice them

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What did one cake say to the other? You wanna piece of me?!?

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why did the Asian by a dog because he was lonely

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What is black, white and red all over? Something that pertains those characteristics

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what's blue and looks like a shirt? a blue shirt

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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