What's the difference between Michael Jackson and Neil Armstrong? Neil Armstrong was the first man to WALK on the MOON. And Michael Jackson was a child molester.

thumb_up thumb_down +16

Why did the little girl fall off of the swing? She didn't have any arms.

thumb_up thumb_down +14

Why did the blonde drown in the bathtub? Her father repeatedly molested her and beat her mother, she no longer wanted to live in such a life and promptly committed suicide

thumb_up thumb_down -16

why did suzie fall off the swing? she had no arms why did suzie get hit by a bus? she was blind knock knock whos there? not suzie.

thumb_up thumb_down +17

why do you throw the baby up the tree??. to get my ball back.

thumb_up thumb_down +4

A frog, duck, monkey and beaver each enter a bar being carried by a blonde, a brunette, and a redhead. If your wondering, the redhead carried two animals.

thumb_up thumb_down -5

Why did the kid hide under the table? There was an earthquake.

thumb_up thumb_down -4

Why did Sally fall off the swing? She had no arms or legs

thumb_up thumb_down +9

What happens every 5 seconds? An African kid dies.

thumb_up thumb_down -16

Y R U A B? I don't know why I am a bee.

thumb_up thumb_down -24

Q: How do you make an onion cry? A: You can't, it's an onion.

thumb_up thumb_down +5

Roses are red Violets are blue Peas are green Plums are purple Thieves are black

thumb_up thumb_down +6

Why? Why not?

thumb_up thumb_down -2

What'd yellow and can"t swim. A black person with a yellow shirt on.

thumb_up thumb_down -17

Chuck noris is so awesome that he brings a knife to a gun-fight, and wins

thumb_up thumb_down -17

Why did the skeleton not get invited to the party? because he was dead

thumb_up thumb_down -9

Whats green and has 4 wheels? A green car.

thumb_up thumb_down

What's tiny and smells like a big banana? A tiny banana

thumb_up thumb_down -16

What does it take to make the best anti-joke ever? not this

thumb_up thumb_down -8

If u swipe fast u will see fish swimming -////--/// //-///--// --//--/// ---/////- -/////--/ ////---// ---///--- ---////-- --////--- //--///-// -//----/// -/-///-/// -/-/-/-/-/ -////-///// -/-/-/-/// -///------ ---------- --///-///-/ -////-//--- -/-/--/--- -/-/-////// ---------- --------- I will call ur doctor to tell him u are retarded

thumb_up thumb_down -26

knock knock There's no door

thumb_up thumb_down -11

Your momma so stupid that it's really inspiring she managed to overcome her limitations and raise such a wonderful family.

thumb_up thumb_down +23

A man walks into a bar. He orders a beer.

thumb_up thumb_down +2

What's the difference between a lawyer and a catfish? The lawyer is a human being whose profession is to give legal advice and assistance to clients and represent them in court or in other legal matters while the catfish is a freshwater or marine fish with whiskerlike barbels around the mouth, typically bottom-dwelling. -BG_Shank_A

thumb_up thumb_down +20

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops