Why did the chicken cross the road Time for you to get a watch

How do you get a man out of a box? Blow the box up

What's the difference between a bag of dead babies and a Ferrari? I have a bag of dead babies in my garage.

Why did I lose a card game to a cat? Cause he was a cheetah!

A girl dropped her pencil while sitting next to her bf... She glanced at his phone while he was texting a message that said "I love you"... The girl jumped up and called him every name she could think of and left the room... The message was to his mother! She didn't listen and left him... He killed himself because she left him... She killed herself because he killed himself... Moral of the story: Don't drop you pencil!

You know what's the least funniest part about cancer? I am about to die in about a month or so.

Why did god smite the homosex man with all of heavens wrath? For shits and gigs.

Jim: Can you shoot a basketball with one hand? Moe: There's no such thing as a basketball with one hand.

How do you make a plumber mad? You tell him that his princess is in another castle about a thousand times over 25 years.

-Knock knock! -Who's there? -DEFAX.

Knock Knock Who's there? Ash Oh hey Ash, I was expecting you, come on in!!

What did God say to the Priest? Nothing, there is no God

Have u seen stevie wonders new house? No. Niether has he

A man jumped off a cliff. He died.

What has 4 eyes but can't see? A blind man wearing glasses.

knock knock whos there? nobody

What did the boy with no arms and no legs, who got cancer for Christmas, get for his Birthday? Nothing, he didn't live that long.

What do you call a kid with no arms, no legs, and an eyepatch? Names.

Why did the chicken cross the road? Being unaware of his surroundings, the chicken was startled by an oncoming motor vehicle. Due to the animals vapid logic an reasoning, based on impulse it quickly ran to the other side of the street to avoid its imminent death by the speeding automobile. Unknowingly, the chicken had reached the other side of the road,

Two cows are in a field. Suddenly, from behind a bush, a rabbit leaps out and runs away. Martin was a lonely man

who do you call when you see a ghost in your apartment? The Mental Hospital.

Roses are green Violets are yellow Those are the wrong colors oh well who gives a shit.

why are marcos hands all swetty. he just got done giving a hand job to joe.

I saw a "Baby on Board" bumper sticker on a car TARGET AQUIRED

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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