So a man walks into a bar, right?

Why did the boy fall off the swing? He had no arms.

Why did the chicken cross the road? Why didn't the chicken cross the road?!

Guess what? What? Your dog is dead.

binladin walks into the american seals

Why did Amy fall out of the swing? She had no arms. Knock knock. (Who's there?) Not Amy.

How do you know a black person is in your house? You see him in your house.

What has a beard and bombed the World Trade Center? Oama Bin Ladin. No, but seriously he's a terrorist.

Half life 3 confirmed

A Chinese man and an american lived together. The Chinese man said to the american man, "I'm going to walk the dog." The American said "OK." Later that night they were eating dinner. The American said to the Chinese man, "I don't think that I've had this meat before. What is it?" The Chinese man replied, "The dog." The American, surprised, spewed out the food he was eating. "THE DOG!?" he yelled, shocked. The Chinese man replied, "Yes, I TOLD you I was going to wok the dog!"

roses are red violets are blue sugar is sweet and grass is green due to the fact that there is chlorophyll in it.

A family walks into a talent agency. It's a father, mother, son, daughter and dog. The father says to the talent agent, "We have a really amazing act. You should represent us." The agent says, "Sorry, I don't represent family acts. They're a little too cute." The mother says, "Sir, if you just see our act, we know you would want to represent us." The agent says, "OK. OK. I'll take a look." The father begins by juggling some balls. The mother pulls out her harmonica and begins playing "Dixie". The children and dog try and get the dog to jump through a hoop. For the longest time, the agent just sits in silence. Finally, he manages, "That's a hell of an act. What do you call it?" And the father says, "The Aristocrats!"

What did the man say when he saw a purple cow? Nothing. He was blind.

hey i just met you,but this is crazy, my name is kony and i just took your baby

Why is Justin Bieber gay? He prefers the companionship of homosexual relationship to that of a heterosexual one.

Q: what's red and covers an elementary school wall? A: a red crayon

Q: what weighs 6 ounces sits in a tree and is very deadly? A: a sparrow with a machine gun

A boy owned a dog that was uncommonly shaggy. Many people remarked upon its considerable shagginess. When the boy learned that there are contests for shaggy dogs, he entered his dog. The dog won first prize for shagginess in both the local and the regional competitions. The boy entered the dog in ever-larger contests, until finally he entered it in the world championship for shaggy dogs. But the day before the championship the dog died.

Roses are red, Violets are blue, I like cows, Cows are cool

What do you say to a hamster? 42 and weasels

What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? Slowly being tortured to death.

Knock knock Who's there? Timmy Timmy who? Timmy Smith

What can be any colour and is made of leather? Cars. I lied about the leather part.

Why did the man walk into the bar? He wast thirsty.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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