Why did Hitler Kill his self Answer- He got a gas bill By Lewis

A local police officer pulls up to tell you something. Listen carefully: Three zebras have been spotted crossing the Mexican border. He goes into his truck, pulls out a can of marbles, peanut butter, seven velcro straps and a rhino horn covered in glitter. Your mission is simple: Kill the zebras using your equipment. You will be rewarded if you have enough peanut butter to make a sandwich after. Go now... Get it done.

What did Batman say to Robin before they got in the car? Get in the car.

You're in a room with your friend, and you see some one being eaten by a monster. Who's getting eaten? No one, monsters aren't real.

There was was 14 apples in a tree. And that's it.

What is duke oxtoby? legend.

How do you wake up lady gaga? First you simply whisper in her ear telling her to wake up. If she doesn't, simultaneously whisper and tap her gently. If you have failed to achieve your accomplished goal, repeat step two however intensely touch her and project your voice when telling her to wake up. Step three, get a... WAIT WAIT!! I just waisted 20 seconds of your life, you're never going to meet her.

Why can't Chuck Norris divide by zero? Because it is impossible, the answer is undefined.

How many people does it take to screw a light bulb? One, it's all the sex they can get.

Did you hear about the blonde that crashed her car? No. Is she okay?

What do you all a black person on the moon? An Astronaut

A man walked into a bar. Ouch.

where do you get virgin wool from? ugly sheep.

Roses are red violets are blue monkeys like you belong in the zoo but don't be afraid I'll be there to that in the cage but laughing at you

What did the FBI agent say to the CIA agent. We're both agents

how do you make a plumber cry? you kill his family!

Q: How many Jew does it take to change a light bulb? Here is the answer: A: A lightbulb cannot be changed, it either is or isn't. Do you mean replace a burned-out bulb with a new one? Here, in this case, with design, logistics, manufacturing, marketing of just that single bulb- there are many people involved. It could be argued that we all play some small part in the process. ------ Nothing to see here, end of the joke. :)

A man walks into a bar and the barman says "Why the long face?" And the man replies "I am severely deformed".

Why was the chair sad? It wasn't, for chairs do not posses the proper attributes to feel emotions such as depression.

why did the baby die? It was hit by a bus and then raped by a seal.

roses are red violet are blue what are you gonna do when chuck norris find you

Knock knock --Come in.

Roses are brown, Violets are brown, WHO THE HELL $#!T IN MY GARDEN?!

Tommy was excited to get a tattoo of a falafel on his wiener. He got skin cancer.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

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The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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