What do you call a black pilot? Whatever his name is, you racist.

2 Penises

Two hunters are out in the woods when one of them collapses. He doesn't seem to be breathing and his eyes are glazed. The other guy whips out his phone and calls the emergency services. He gasps, "My friend is dead! What can I do?". The operator says "Calm down. I can help. First, let's make sure he's dead." There is a silence, then the man returns and says, "My friend does not have a pulse, so I stand by my prior assumption that he is dead."

I've got a boner

Q:How do u kill a butcher A: Kill its family

What happened to the blonde who blew out her birthday candles? Her hair caught on fire

Where did Jonathan go when the bombs hit? Everywhere.

rose's are red violets are blue I have touretts blblblblblblblblbbl

how do you stop santa from laughing? snap his neck.

How do you kill a ninja? Shoot him with a sniper rifle from a building. How do you make sure he's dead? Shoot him twice.

Why did the chicken cross the road? The farmer dragged him.

What happens when you put two black people in a blender? That is physically impossible, you cannot fit two people in an ordinary blender.

A black man walks up to a jewish man in a bar. They engage into a nice conversation, seeing how they were friends back in college.

Roses are red The grass is green I want you in my bed If you know what I mean.

If anybody wants a free RuneScape account, the username is Antbongton and the password is fluckaduck

What did little Jimmy say when he saw a group of dancing blue penguins dressed as cannibal clowns with saucers on their head ? "What the f*ck"

She look like Ms. Universe and I'm bout to be in that black hole

What do you call a black thing hanging from a tree A tire swing

A man walks into a bar. After recovering, he sues the bar for it's irregular glass doors.

Q: What did the black guy say to the white guy? A: Nothing, he's a mute.

Roses are red Im adopted

Kidding, not trucing, Dylan sucks prick. Brock likes his mums butt.

Knock knock "Honey, could you get the door?" "I'm tired of doing everything here! Get you ass up and do it yourself!" "Well why don't you just go back to bar you whore?" "This marriage was a mistake, I'm going back to mother!" They divorced 5 months later.

There were three brothers. Big, Harry and Dick. They were walking along the road and were all instantly killed by a drunk driver. Their names were never mentioned and their story was used as a promotion for the seriousness of drunk driving and should not be taken lightly.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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