What did the two homosexual dolphins do when nobody was around? They continued on their way because neither of them had met.

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Why can't helen Keller read? She's dead.

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A dog walks into a bar. A patron checks its tags and promptly calls the owner.

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how do u unload the dishwasher? u take the dishes out!

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Is worse than biting into an apple and finding a worm? Getting AIDS.

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What did the women order for dessert? Pie.

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What do you call a Mexican from Cancun? A cholo.

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Q:What's similar between a squirel and a eagle? A:Both have wings, exept for the squirrel.

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A man walks into a doctors office and waits for his turn. After his name was called he walked up to the doctor and told him that he kept having hallucinations. The doctor prescribed an antibiotic to help with the mans addiction to LSD.

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What did the greeter at walmart say to the black man? Welcome to walmart.

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What do I have in common with your mum? We're in the same bed right now.

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OSS ARE RED VIOLENTS IS BLUE U BELONG THE ZOO I WILL BE THERE TO BUT LAUGHIN AT U

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Your mom is so fat that her every day life if a struggle and she has to get gastric bypass surgery or else she is going to die

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These are some questions you should never ask on a first date: When you wipe do you throw your toilet tissue in the toilet or on a trash can? Do you smell your hands after you wipe? Do you you ever look down when you take a dump and see it come out? Have you ever picked your butt and then picked your nose with the same finger?

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So dont touch it

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"what's fat,stupid,and has a shell" "i don't know what" "you, i lied about the shell"

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Why couldn't Helen Keller drive? Because she was deaf, dumb, and blind.

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Man 1:Doctor Doctor, I've got 59 seconds to live! Man 2: This is a chemist

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hes climbing in your window, hes snatching your people up. Hes a fireman.

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An astronaut and a cosmonaut are sitting in a bar, discussing who was better. The cosmonaut says, "We Russians were the first people in space!" The astronaut says, "That may be true, but we were the first to land on the moon my friend." The cosmonaut turns back to the astronaut and says, "Yes, but we shall be then first to ever land on the Sun!" So, the astronaut skeptically asks, "And how do you intend to do that?" The cosmonaut replies, "Simple.......we will go at night." Thank you to David Cross

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A pregnant woman walks into a bar and orders a drink. The bartender refuses to give the woman alcohol because he acknowledges a health risk for her unborn child.

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Why can't Stevie Wonder read? Clearly the only answer is because he's blind

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you're a loser >>>>>>>>>>>

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A man walks into a bar, gets caught in a knife fight, and dies horribly. The funeral was closed casket.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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