I LIKE TURLES.

What's worse than losing your job? 9/11

Where must you go if you have the desire to eat somebody's face? A psychiatric ward. You are clearly going insane and must seek help.

Why couldn't the black man swim? Both of his legs were just eaten by a shark.

Why did the chicken cross the road? Adolf Hitler.

Your mother is so obese that she has over the recommended daily calorie intake on a regular basis.

Why did the boy go back in time? He didn't. He was mutilated by rabid apes.

A white kid, a black kid, and an Asian kid all try out for the basketball team. Which one makes the team? All of them, because they are all very good.

How do you make a baby cry? Break its legs.

What do you call a black pilot? A pilot.

Why can't you get a pterodactyl use the bathroom? Because they're extinct.

Dimes are silver Pennies are brass Why does your face look like an a**

Knock knock Whose there? you you who you know who you are

violets are blue, my name is Dave. this poem makes no sense. microwave.

A man walks into a bar and says "ouch."

I just missed my bus. At least I haven't got cancer.

Why was the math text book so worried....… Because he had to many problems

What's the difference between Jesus and a painting? It only takes one nail to hang up a painting.

What is black, white, and red all over? A domino dipped in kitten blood.

"Hey dude, wanna come with me??" "Sure! Where????" "To the grocery store, I need to buy a couple of lemons"

A little blind girl goes up to her mum and says, "Mummy, mummy, when will I be able to see?" Her mum replies "I'll tell you what, I'll take you to the chemist and get you some special cream for your eyes and you will be able to see in the morning." So off they went to the chemist, got the cream, and went home, all the while the little girl was getting more and more excited at the prospect of being able to see again. Once they got home, the mother put the cream on the little girls eyes, wrapped a bandage around her head, and took her to bed. The following morning the little girl stumbled into her mums bedroom and excitedly shouted "Quick mummy, take off the bandage so that i will be able to see again." So the mother slowly took of all the bandages, taking her time, and all the while the little girl was getting more and more excited. Once they were off the little girl said "But mummy, I still can't see." To which the mother replied, "April fool!"

who is gay and sits next to me in my architecture class? James and austin!!!!

How much is an abortion? A life

A baby seal walks into a club. I happens to be that the club is having their bi-annual PETA meeting, and the baby seal is chosen as the organization's new mascot. After touring the nation and meeting important world leaders, the baby seal still wonders why there was a club at the North Pole.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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