what did batman say to robin before they got in the car? "robin get in the car"

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what do you call a man that looks like will ferrel? jim

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Knock Knock! Who's There? Whoevers at the door you should probably go answer it.

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When Chuck Norris does a push up, he pushes himself up which puts resistance on his arms and therefore strengthens his arm muscles and performs physical exercise.

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Roses are red, violets are blue That's a fact.

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I'd feel bad for some skinny guy who lived in a very obese family and only got hand me downs.

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i read the terms of service when i posted this

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yeah..

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I've got a joke for you. The people writing these jokes. Thats a joke.

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wanna hear a joke. i do to

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A man named Carl walks into a bar and sees another man named Ed who has purple skin and is holding a chinchilla in one hand and a policeman's helmet in the other. Carl approaches Ed and asks, "Why is your skin purple and why are you holding a chinchilla in one hand and a policeman's helmet in the other?" Ed replies stating, "Well its actually a pretty funny story. I was sailing near cape cod and a saw a large whale jump out of the water, and that gave me a really good idea. So I sailed home immediately and wrote a very detailed novel about my days in Vietnam. The book was a success and I was able to make a large amount of money. However, unfortunately I became addicted to cocaine and wasted all of my money and had to live on the streets. Since then, I have cleaned up my act and am working again and have a house. I decided to treat myself to a night out and so I came here and painted myself purple. Then, I found this chinchilla and policeman's helmet on the floor and decided to hold onto it until I find the owner. Now that I think about it, that story isn't very funny. I apologize." Carl then accepted the apology and the two had a drink together and are still good friends today.

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What's Mackaulay Culkin's favorite salad dressing? Neverland Ranch.

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How do you get a clown off of your property? You ask him politely to get off and if he doesn't, you should contact the authorities immediately.

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A man goes to the doctor. The doctor says, I'm sorry but you have about four to six months to live. The man goes home and checks his million dollar life insurance policy.It expires in three months.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Doesn't matter. He was hit by a semi truck.

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knock knock. who's there? Kony. Kony who? Kony says:" Uganda be abducted"

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So a man walks into a bar and gets drunk.

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The snake had no skatebord to put johnnys refrigirator because the bettles mom had stolen the clowns purse were his parking had been for the airplane higway stop.

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What does it mean when your dog goes to the bathroom on your floor? He hasn't been very well potty trained By: robobob123

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Q. At the main menu why are there two people sad? A. Because there is.

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Why couldn't little Tiffany play kickball with the rest of the kids during recess? Tiffany is a pencil.

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hi im tom. whats your name? joe. hi im tom. whats your name? joe... tom has short term memory loss.

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what did the rabbi say to the priest? jesus christ, your breath stinks.

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Yo momma so fat that when she sat on the bible jesus poped out.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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