Why did the shark put on a dress? She was getting ready for prom.

whats long, hairy, and has one eye? my cat fluffy, he has cancer.

A Priest and a young child walk into a dark alley.... It leads to a church and he talks to the young boy about God

Knock Knock Who's there Your serial killer

Whats the best way to take the leaves off the tree? - Cut down the tree-

what do you get when you stick a pair of scissors in a four year old? an erection.

DON'T expect the unexpected, you don't want to KILL the unexpected ;-)

How did 3 fat women fit under 1 small umbrella and not get wet? It wasn't raining!

Why couldn't the woman drive? She was dead.

Why did a man get fired from the M&M store? He was color blind.

knock knock, who's there me me who he opens the door a kills yo

Why didn't Lucas want to go down the slide? He was scared.

How many dead babies fit into a bathtub? I honestly don't know, as I have never tested this out, nor do I plan to because I would like to not handle the bodies of poor deceased infants.

Yo momma so poor, she can't afford to live in a two story Cheerio box

Q: Why does the blonde have the biggest tits in the third grade? A: Because she's 21

Q: What did one blind girl ask the other? A: Where are you?

Why was the boy crying? Because he had previously driven over innocent civilians who were all constipated and had now caused a mild to extremely large shitstorm.

who is awesome? no one...

Why did the man remain calm when the judge passed the death sentence? Because he was in another country and had no connection with the case.

Q: Why was the little boy upset? A: His nose was glued to the sidewalk.

Your mom is so ugly that she was mercilessly bullied throughout high school which led to severe depression and low self-esteem, however she went to college, got a career, found a man who loved her for who she is, not how she looks, and raised a family happily ever after.

The battle of Troy lasted approximatley nine years.

if a white guy, a black guy and a hispanic guy jump off a 10 story building, who hits the ground first? the man who jumped first. racist.

what better than getting an F on a test? getting an A on a test.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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