Roses are Gray, Violets are Gray, I am color-blind, I hate my life

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Let's play twenty questions. Alright, but I have to warn u I have piss running down my leg

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What do you call a man with a spade in his head? An ambulance.

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Paul was mowing his lawn when he felt a bump. It turned out it was a bunny. Paul felt bad but the bunny felt worse

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What do you call two Muslims flying an airplane? Pilots

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Why did the boy drop his ice cream? Because he was hit by a bus.

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Knock, knock who's there? Not your Dad, because he left and created a better family.

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Three Blondes were walking when they come upon some tracks. The first blonde says they're deer tracks. The second blonde says they're elk tracks. The last blonde says they're moose tracks. While they are all arguing about what type of tracks they are, they get hit by a train.

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What did one muffin say to the other muffin? Nothing. Muffins are incapable of speaking.

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You know what's funnier than 24? .... 9-11

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Your momma's so fat she ate oranges and coffe

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What happens if you are in the north pole at a temperature of -2 Cº and you throw a rock to the air in straight line? The green rockeater will eat it

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Why couldn't Roger become an astronaut? Because Roger's a toaster.

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What happened when the roof fell on a young boy? Nothing. He was an orphan.

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A person with OCD walked into a abr.

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what do you call a dog with no legs. It dosent matter it wont come

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How do you make time fly? You can't, time is the duration of events and therefore cannot "fly".

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How often do you remember a dream? Well what if I told you that this is a dream go ahead pinch your arm. You probably didn't feel pain. And just incase jump out a fifth story window. Come on do it. Now if you are still reading this you are either dreaming or didn't jump out the window. Shame on you!!!!!!

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Asian son: "I'm using a calculator for my math" Asian mother: "Why not you calculatnow!"

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Why couldn't the Joker browse the internet? He was using Compuserve.

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Your momma's so fat, when Jesus said, "Let there be light!," she had to scoot over.

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Whats the difference beetween a pilgrim and a jack-o-lantern? Jack-o-lanters didn't discover america.

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You know it's sunny outside when you go outside and its sunny

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What's funnier than the Holocaust? HA!

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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