Q:Whats not funny? A: Antijokes

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Why don’t stores sell mouse-flavored cat food? It’s a matter of marketing; tuna, chicken and liver flavors sound much more palatable to the humans buying the pet food.

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what's worse than finding a worm in your apple? Finding several worms in your apple.

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What would you do if I jumped down your throat when you were talking? That would never happen, as it's impossible to even climb into somebody's mouth.

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what did the boy with no hands get for christmas Gloves!!! just kidding i dont know he hasnt opened the box yet

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Why can't a Tyrannosaurus-Rex clap? It's Dead.

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What's the difference between a dead baby and a Ferrari? I don't keep a Ferrari in my garage. (????)?

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why was little johnny crying? he had frogs stapled to his face.

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Where is Sally hiding? She was kidnapped and has probably been murdered, I lied about her hiding.

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, Im a Jew, Fart yourself.

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A woman crashes her car into a pole Thier family is suing for a hit and run

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What do a rabbit and a plum have in common? -They're both purple except the rabbit.

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Womens rights

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What do you get with you crossbreed a lamp with a chicken? Nothing... You can't crossbreed an inanimate object with a living being.

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Ed Milliband knows what's best for the UK.

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I EAT YOUR SOUL. NOM NOM.

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What is the difference between Madeleine McCan and a toaster? A toaster wasn't raped and murdered.

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What's the difference between Jews and Germans? Jews are allowed to have an opinion about the Holocaust and hoot and holler and threaten anyone who has a different opinion than they. The sad, anti-joke part of this is that most morons will actually support this tyrannical bullying behavior. Also, special taxes against Germans that they're not allowed to have a problem with. I guess slavery is okay if you're White.

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what happens when you try to believe it's not butter? 34 Indonesian kids lose their job.

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have u been drinking cannabel soup because you........ahhhhh!!!!! why are you trying to eat me!

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A horse walks into a bar...n

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Why was Timmy sad? While helping his dad hang Christmas light, he got tangled up in them and fell down. While falling he grabbed a wire, which caused a spark. This spark lit the house on fire. Since he broke most of the bones in his body from falling he could not run away. The house proceeded to collapse an poor Timmy seriously injuring and hideously disfiguring him. By the time the ambulance got there, Timmy was the only survivor for his parents died of smoke inhalation. Since he had no other living relatives he was forced to live in an orphanage for the rest of his childhood. That is why Timmy is sad.

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What do you get if you cross a Kangaroo and a Sheep? They are too entirely different species and cannot be crossbred.

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"How come dinosaurs don't talk?" " I don't know. Why?" " Because they're dead."

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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