what did the smoker say to the doctor? nothing she died of lung cancer.

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How do you wake up Lady GaGa you set her alarm clock to a reasonable time

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What do you get if you pour water over a firework? A wet firework

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If a tree falls on a woman, and no one is around to hear it, what is a tree doing in the kitchen?

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Why can't T-rex give hih fives, Because they're dead...

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why did the chicken cross the road? he didnt.. that kinda shit never happens

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Yo momma so fat that she was diagnosed with obesity and may need medical assistance in the future and will be reliant on you, her child.

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What did the Pillow say to the Blanket? Nothing. Inanimate objects do not contain the ability to speak, therefore they could not possibly say anything to each other.

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What do you call a black doctor? Doctor.

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What did the passive-aggressive woman do to her husband? She killed him. As it turns out, the slight passive-aggressive behavior she was showing was actually an early warning sign of a dangerous sociopathic mental disorder. The authorities are looking for her as we speak and will soon have her institutionalized.

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What do humans and fish both have in common? They both live underwater, apart from humans.

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Why is the man's nose bleeding? Because I punched him in the nose. He looked at me funny.

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Knock knock. Who's there? Mark. Oh Hai Mark

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What was the blind man doing before he was strangled? He was breathing.

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What is orange and sticky? A blue ice cream with no skeletal structure Hang on, Ice Creams don't talk and the ice cream wasn't even yellow!

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Your momma is SOO FAT that I had to call my doctor. He said you should go on a diet and exercise. I called my local gym and gave your mom a 3 months membership. Monday to Friday. Your welcome and good luck.

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How do you make a plumber cry Kill his family

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How did the stapeler disappear? I ate it.

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Why couldnt rex bark??? because he was a fish!

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What the heck are you gonna do if you're on a picnic and have an ice cream and then the ants crawl on the ice cream, what are you gonna do? You're gonna eat the ants because it's made out of protein.

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How do you get 100 Jews into a car? You can't. It's physically impossible.

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What do you call a joke with no punchline?

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Your momma's so dumb she graduated high school with a C average.

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What is up, the color blue and has a face? the sky. there is no face.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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