Why did the boy throw the clock out the window? He was severely depressed.

thumb_up thumb_down +33

obama

thumb_up thumb_down -21

Why did the boy fail the test? He had down syndrome.

thumb_up thumb_down -7

What did the man say to the attractive female bartender as he left the bar? Well, it's been fun but I hate you so I'm leaving to kill your entire family.

thumb_up thumb_down +31

Why did the beautiful girl get the job over the not so beautiful looking girl She was more qualified

thumb_up thumb_down -1

Breanna baked a pie. what kind of pie was it? A JIMMY PAI

thumb_up thumb_down -2

Where do babies come from? My sex dungeon

thumb_up thumb_down -7

What do you call a Puerto Rican, a Blonde, and an African woman in a taxi cab? Three people who happen to be traveling to the same location at the same point in time.

thumb_up thumb_down +4

Why can't Micheal J. Fox draw a perfect circle? Because there is no such person as Micheal J. Fox. Michael J. Fox, on the other hand, cannot draw a perfect circle because he has Parkinson's disease.

thumb_up thumb_down +52

What do a grape and a spider have in common? Both have 8 legs..... Except for the grape.

thumb_up thumb_down +15

Why was the presidential candidate sad? He mother was raped on her way to hear his speech and his brother hung himself in his apartment two days earlier.

thumb_up thumb_down -18

NEVER

thumb_up thumb_down +20

what did the bug say when it got ran over by a car? NOTHING, bugs can't talk

thumb_up thumb_down +26

Why did the black man begin to cry when his friend aimed a gun at a watermelon? Because if he were to shoot it would be a waste of perfectly good food.

thumb_up thumb_down -6

Who looks like Bill Cosby, Smells like Bill Cosby, But isn't Bill Cosby? An imposter who should be sent to jail.

thumb_up thumb_down +3

A: Knock knock B: Who's there? A: Doctor B: Doctor who? A: Doctor Johnson, i'm here to check up on you. How's the medication going? B: It's going well thank you, it's working. A: That's very good to hear. Hope you recover soon. B: Thank you!

thumb_up thumb_down +16

Why did the monkey eat the pineapple? IDK, ask Sam D

thumb_up thumb_down -17

When is the best time to eat? When you feel like it.

thumb_up thumb_down -9

Why did the chicken cross the road? It didn't.

thumb_up thumb_down -15

What do old people break when they fight? A sweat

thumb_up thumb_down -25

What's the difference between your momma and a bucket of shit? Well, for starters your mother and a bucket of shit aren't even made of the same physical structure, and secondly, your mother is sentient while a bucket is not.

thumb_up thumb_down -19

-Whats the worst part about being a black jew? -You have to sit in the back of the oven.

thumb_up thumb_down -36

Your mom is so dumb that all of society says she was poorly educated.

thumb_up thumb_down +1

Why do women live longer? Once they're sexual and metabolistic hormones are moleculy different from men's, their metabolism is different and act on different organs and vice-versa. Therefore, they live longer. Still, in a worldwide average, more men born than women.

thumb_up thumb_down +2

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops