Q: What do you call a black guy flying a plane? A: A pilot you racist.

Why could susan not get up? Because her limbs were hacked off by a African militia group.

varför skriver jag på svenska jag vet inte

Eat My Food!!! Joking I dont have any food

If I could rearrange the alphabet, I would put my dick in your ass

There once was an old man. He had worked hard his whole life to make sure his children got everything they needed, and that they were always happy. He had a beautiul life and a great big house with a marvelous view of the ocean. In time his kids moved away, and his wife died. The old man was left all by himself in the great big house, and sometimes the emptiness of the house reminded him of the emptiness of his own heart. He very seldom cried though, and kept all of his emotions inside. One day it all became to much for him and he took his own life in the silence of his great big empty house. I was that ocean.

Why did the sloth cross the road? To murder your whole family.

Whats the Difference between a corvette and a pile of dead babies? A Pile of dead babies is basically useless

How many fairies does it take to screw in a lightbulb? Two, but I don't know how they got in there.

whats my name? Matt

Knock knock Who's there? Alzhiemers guy Alzhiemers guy who? Knock knock

Whats worse than finding a worm in your apple? That boy that dropped a perfectly good ice cream cone from a road accident involving a bus due to lack of road safety awareness Oh yeah, and I guess the fact that he probably died or was injured for life is pretty bad too

They don't call it Bangkok for nothing.

What did the father say to his gay son? "Finish your homework."

A little boy walks into a bar its fine, he's over 21, he just looks younger.

Why did the chicken cross the road? There is no reason. Chickens don't have the thinking skills to reason.

What did one deer say to the other? Nothing. The second deer was killed while they were eating and now the first deer is scarred dot life.

What's big and long? My dick.

How do you confuse a blonde? You ask her a question.

I have read the Terms of Service.

what happens when you throw a green rock into the red sea? -- it gets wet

Q: how many Pollocks does it take to paint a house? A: 100. 99 to spin the house and 1 to hold the paint brush

Why is that man such a perv? I don't know. Ever since I let him see my boobs, he has had this undying obsession with sex. So, I guess that, as society would classify him, he is a sex addict. He will do anything for it, even if he needs a man to get it. I feel terrible about starting his obsession, and plan to take him to therapy next week for the sake of his health.

Q. What does physiks sound to most of the people? A. There were two camels, one was green, how much does the sand weight when its dark?

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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