A boy bought a dozen roses, eleven real, one fake. He looks deeply into his girlfriends eyes, hers looking back, brimming with love and affection as he says, "I slept with your sister."

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What do you call a dog with 5 legs? A dog with 5 legs.

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Why did the man staple his own scrotum to his left thigh? He didn't. His friends did.

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What's fat and ugly? Your face ... But only if its fat and ugly

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What do a plum and a rabbit have in common? They are both purple except for the rabbit.

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What should someone do if they are Le Zirk? Have a zirk. THEN FIRE THE ZIRKKK!!!!!!!

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What did the lion say to the Octopus? Nothing, lion's can't speak. And even if they did, the chances of one ever encountering an octopus are very slim.

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Two biscuits were sitting in an oven. One says to the other hows it going, the other says nothing because he knows that biscuits can't talk.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? ... So he didn't get Mono from Janelle.

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Girl: I love you in a platonic way Guy: ... Is that some kind of fat joke!

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A man buy's a new lawn mower, it breaks so he takes it back. The shopworker says that if you don't have a recipt then you cannot replace it, the man goes home and months later catch's a flu.

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You walk into a shopping centre, what wont you see? Madelin McCann.

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dude ur such a bon of a sitch

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Hot Lady: What do you do for a living? Guy: Phosphorus, Oxygen, and Radon. Hot Lady: So you are a chemist? Guy: Think again! Think about Acronyms... Hot Lady: OPRa, so Opera correct? Guy: (Obviously talking to a Blonde) P, O, Rn Hot Lady: So, you are a chemistry teacher! Guy: (Sighs to himself thinking how PORn relates to chemistry. Which it does in biochemistry, but he does not know that).

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Q: What's 1 + 1? A: I don't know, I am an African who was bought up in the famine my mother died, my father starved. I have to sell myself to feed my sisters. I never went to school and drink my urine every second day because I have no water.

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What did the black man buy at the fruit shop? Some bananas.

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Question: What do you call a Black person who cooks food at a fried chicken restaurant? Answer: A chef

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What did the Big Chimney say to the Little Chimney? Nothing, chimneys are unable to talk.

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whats white and big and white? alot of things...

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why did the boy drop his ice cream? a terrorist dropped a bomb on him which turned into a transformer, raped him and then burried him inside of his refridgerator

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What should you do if you have a 10 inch penis? Subtly tell the world via an anti-joke

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How does Batman's mother call him to dinner? She doesn't, she's dead.

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What do you call a man with no brain? dead.

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What Do You Call a Hawk in Virginia? A Hawk What Do you Call a Hawk that lives in Virginia? Virginan Hawk

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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