you need 2 pple for this. Ask me if im a tree? Are you a tree? no

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A serial killer walks into a bar... He is finally arrested after killing several people within the bar, goes to court, and it was decided that he is suffering from a rare case of maddening schizophrenia, and sent indefinitely to a mental hospital...

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I have aids

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call me if you want xxx on 0407777235

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What did the cow say to the chicken crossing the road? Moo

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What's good about having alzheimers? You meet new people every day!

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You spent your time reading this and realized there was no joke.

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Did you know Helen Keller had a playhouse in her backyard? Well if you didn't, it was quite nice. I was her neighbor.

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scraggle is in you pillow case

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what do you call it when everyone becomes tolerant about gender identity. whatever pronoun it prefers.

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I woke up in bed with someone this morning. I forget why this is a joke, but your mother is a whore.

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Q: John eats 50 cany bars, eats 45, how many does he have now? A: Diabetes

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AIDS.

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Why did little Timmy scrape his knee? He was launched off of an aircraft carrier.

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A man wanted to kill himself.. He did.

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A smart kid just answered a question in class, a blonde girl then says "Nerd, your always answering all the questions". The teacher then says "Hey thats not nice, he could be your boss one day." The smart kid quickly replies "Highly unlikely, i do not plan on being a pimp when i grow up".

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Q: How many dead babies does it take to fill a mixing bowl? A: There is an infinite amount of answers to this question depending on the sizes and shapes or the dead babies, so lets assume that an average would probably be about 4 babies that dies just as the left the mother.

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What's green, red, and goes fifty miles an hour? A frog in a blender.

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Why was Billy unhappy? He was molested by a black guy.

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What's worse than a worm in your apple? The Holocost

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Why did Peter Piper pick a peck of pickled peppers? Peppers help strengthen his immune system.

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Why did the chicken eat fried chicken? Because fried chicken is so good! Kelvin Yang.

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A duck walks into a convient store and ask the cashier, "You got any bread?". The cashier immediatley responds, "No sorry, we don't sell bread." The next day the duck comes back and asks the same cashier, "You got any bread?" The cashier sighs and responds, "No, we still have no bread." After browsing for about three minutes the duck comes back and asks, "You have any bread?" The cashier, as pissed off as a beached whale, says, "NO! WE WILL NEVER GET ANY FRICKEN BREAD AND IF YOU ASK AGAIN I'LL NAIL YOUR BEAK TO THIS COUNTER!" The duck sways his head and looks to the ground, only to look right back at the cashier and ask, "You got any nails." The cashier says, "No." The duck comes back and says, "You got any bread?"

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Chinese, Japanese, dirty knees - have nothing at all in common.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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