What's the worst subject in school? None of them. You need school to get by in life. Get over it.

What's brown and sticky? Shit.

A man walks into a bar. Suddenly, he is filled with a strange feeling, as if his life is somehow the subject of a stupid joke. He walks back out of the bar and consults a psychiatrist.

Why did the pollock jump into the sea? A pollock is a fish.

Knock knock. Who's there? Robert. Robert who? Robert Anderson.

What do you call a boy with no arms and legs? Simply a pillow

Roses are red, Violets are blue. Some poems don't rhyme, This one doesn't.

Why did the Chicken Cross the road? Because it did...

What's the difference between a piano and a fish? A piano is an instrument, fish is an animal

What is the difference between Santa and a Jew? Santa is a fictional character used to represent Christmas, Jews celebrate Hanukkah.

A duck walks into a over 7-11 and says "Give me some Chapstick, put it on my bill!" But the cash register attendee doesn't speak English and cannot understand him. He does, however, question whether his God is punishing him because as all people know, Ducks cannot speak, however, this hallucination must be punishment for a horrid misdeed. The employee breaks down into tears and begins reciting prayer. The duck, slightly miffed, walks out, pondering why he'd need Chapstick anyway, since he has no lips.

Awesome! I've just received my free minecraft giftcode! >> minecraftnow.us <

A pregnant woman walks into a bar and miscarries.

Why doesn't Mexico have a navy? Because cardboard doesn't float!

what did the boy with no arms and legs get for chrismas ? cancer

What do you call it when a woman doesn't want the child she is currently impregnated with? Abortion: a very sensitive and controversial topic.

A: Knock Knock! B: No ones home.

Why did the chicken cross the road? To try to get the antidote for his dying baby chick.

What has 4 legs and cant walk? A paralyzed dog

Your social life.

you know whats weird about italians? their italian

Why are haikus dumb Because they are just stupid Get it a haiku It is a haiku hashaha

Why did the woman walk into the men's clothing store? She's a lesbian. Why did the man walk into the womens clothing store? He had to buy his mom a birthday present.

What is your favorite color???? My mom I got u s o godd.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...