I still remember the last thing my grandfather said before he kicked the bucket. He said: "Hey, I wonder how far I can kick this bucket."

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A. Do you know the best part about Anti Jokes? B. No

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Yo mama so fat, she gonna die soon.

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Knock knock Who's there Joe Aids who's?

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Little Miss Muffet sat on a tuffet, but she had anal hemorrhaging so it really hurt

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Why did the robot cross the road? Because it was a banana.

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Roses are red violets are blue this is an anti joke so like this

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knock knock! who is there? its knock! knock who??? knock knock... who is there.... i told you its knock... knock who??? knock knock... WHO IS THERE!! OMG I TOLD YOU ITS KNOCK! KNOCK WHO!! WHO IS KNOCK! KNOCK KNOCK OMG WTF! HOLY SHIT WHO IS THERE! ITS KNOCK WE HAVE KNOWN EACH OTHER OUR WHOLE LIVES! KNOCK WHO?? KNOCK KNOCK WHY DONT YOU REMEMBER ME! oh knock knock from next door! who is there???? jk.. knock...knock......omg put down the gun knock knock stop i love you knock its not worth it!! NO KNOC!!! GUNSHOT* KNOCK NOOOOO!!! I LOVED YOU SOMEONE CALL 911!! OMG KNOCK WHY!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! OH KNOCK WHY!!!!

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Looking for a job in this economy is like trying to find employment during an extreme economic downturn.

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Is your plant made out of Osmium, Molybdenum, Silicon and Sulfur? Because it's going through OsMoSiS. That was just a joke, not a pick up line. Unless I was giving a pick-up line to your plant, which I definitely wasn't...

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Knock knock Who's there Ted Bundy

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Yo mama is so fat when she went to the fat contest they said SORRY no pros alowed

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A man walks into a bar. He's covered in Ash because the north tower just collapsed.

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Black Poeple

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Who lost World War II? The Jews.

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How old is your mom Dead

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What's black and white and red all over? I don't care I have AIDS

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A duck walks into a bar and says he needs to buy a hammer. The bartender tells him that he's probably looking for the hardware store across the street. The duck realizes that he's disoriented again and should listen to his wife's many pleadings to get back on his medication.

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What did one duck say to the other? "Quack!"

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there r three guys on a bridge. They r chinese,mexican,&american. They each have a bottle of beer. The chinese dude says I have enough of this in my country and throws it over the bridge. Then the mexican says I have enough of this in my country and throws it over the bridge. The american takes a drink of his and sets it down he looks at the mexican and says I have enough of these in my country and throws the mexican over the bridge.

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What do you call a man man with no arms and no legs floating in the ocean? Bob(he is bobbing in the water)

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a man walks into a bar. ouch. that must suck, but he should really look where he's going

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Why does Rupert The Bear wear checkered trousers? Because he's a twat.

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Why didn't Santa deliver presents until the night after Christmas? You should go ask someone who knows.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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