Your mom is so fat she should be concerned about her increased risk of heart failure.

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*Knock Knock* "whose there?"... "me"

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Why did the Black man drown? Because he could not and did not know how to swim. Because he could not afford the lessons to learn how to swim. Because he does not have the financial means to afford a lesson in swimming. Because he is of a low socio-economic level.

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What did the nintendo Wii say as it went down the slide? They don't talk.

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what did the chicken say to the vet? nothing chickens dont talk

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I wumbo, you wumbo, he she me,.WUMBO!

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What'd the black woman say when she met her husband's white mistress? Have you seen Jamal's socks?

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What's worse than kissy face pictures on facebook? The porn pictures on facebook.

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What did the boy with cancer get for Christmas? An amputation.

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Justin Bieber saying "shawty"

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What does a lonely man do on opposite day? I don't know. Why should we know what he does, that is both weird and illegal. Stalking is a serious crime and should not be used. We do not know what he does on normal days, thus we cannot come to a conclusion to this question. However, I do hypothesize that he must be social on this day because this is the opposite of lonely.

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what do u call a dumbass phone cia cias phone

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how did the family die? They were shot in the head.

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Why was the lady afraid of rocks? Because her husband was stoned.

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What is big, white, and hurts when it falls from the sky? A FRIDGE

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Q: Why did the chicken cross the road? A: The chicken saw greater opportunities to find food on the other side

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Did you know Helen Keller had a playground in her backyard? Neither did she

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What time did the tennis start? Tennish

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How do you piss off a moose? You throw popcorn at it

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Why did the priest kill his family? Preists can't marry, therefore have not families.

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Give one reason for not visiting a hotel. Basil Fawlty is the manager.

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What do you call a black pilot? A pilot you racist.

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A black man and a mexican man are in a car. Who is driving? The cop. The two men were best friends who had taken off from their law firm. The mexican, Alex, had recently gone through a divorce and John decided to take him on a trip backpacking across Europe. Rain had suddenly come upon them and a passing off-duty police officer had picked them up and took them to a nearby hotel. The three men had drinks and the friends had a wonderful rest of their trip. Alex, however never got over Jenny leaving him. 3 months after their return John found him dead in his home by auto-erotic asphyxiation. John was never the same.

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Why are these jokes so funny? I don't know?

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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