A hot girl walks by a boy and he stares at her as she walks past. She see's him and asks "What are you looking at?", to which the boy replied "Oh I'm sorry. You happened to look familiar and I thought 'Perhaps I've met this person before. School? No. Work? No. I then concluded I've never seen you before and then you turned around and asked me what I was looking at".

Why did the chicken cross the road? Because he had already looked both ways and there was no traffic.

Why did the chicken cross the road? No one is quite sure because technology is not advanced enough for humans to converse with chickens.

Joe goes to the bathroom with someone in the next stall named Bill Bill: "Hi" Joe: "Hi" Bill: "How you doing" Joe: "Good" Bill: "You traveling" Joe: "Yes to Alabama" Bill: "Yeah, I got to go a guy in the next stall answering all my questions bye"

What do you call a man with no legs? A cripple

What did Santa say to his elf? Nothing. Santa isn't real. Elves aren't either for that matter.

what happened to the fish that got washed ashore? it died due to lack of water-borne air particles.

A man walked into a bar and a knife seventeen times.

What's so great about twenty-three year olds? There's twenty of them.

Q : whats the most annoying thing on the earth with a big fore head ? A : Paige

your mom died.

Q: what did the common cold say to the cough? A: you are SO annoying!

Why did the little boy have a gun pointed at his head? Because he hated his life and wanted to kill himself.

What's black and white and red all over? A black, white, and red shirt.

knock knock whos there haha this is a shit joke anyone that reads this is a jimmy saville follower and got fingered up the bum hole violently by him love you

why couldn't the girl make her bed? she is homeless.

What did the white guy tell the black guy? You are my equal and, as such, are entitled to the same things I am.

What did the teacher tell the failing student? You will most likely be kicked out of our school and have no further education and be subjected to a low-level career.

A Jew and a Muslim are sitting in a bar. The Muslim asks the Jew for some money to buy a drink. The Jew said, "how much?" The Muslim said, "$7.00" The Jew then said, "yes."

What do you call an amazing person Good

Why did the chicken cross the road? The cognitive capacity of the chicken is significantly underdeveloped in comparison to humans; thus, comprehending a chicken's motives is impossible. Furthermore, interspecies communication is largely understudied - a mysterious division of science that may never be fully revealed. Therefore, one could safely theorize that no single human could breach this gap ...in communication differences (assuming chickens do, in fact, communicate) and in turn, could not understand the chicken's reasoning behind its choice to cross the road (excluding the possibility of psychic connections between chickens and humans [see 'Dog Whisperer' for a more clear explanation on interspecial psychic relations])That being said, the only scientific and logical way one could understand the aforementioned question is through observation. For example, perhaps food was located on the other side of the road. However, this seems to pose a plethora of other questions: Why was the chicken near a road and not in a coop stocked with adequate food? Was this a wild chicken? Are there wild chickens? Do wild chickens often cross roads? Are wild chickens dangerous? If so, why hasn't there been warnings about dangerous, wild chickens crossing roads? The answer to these questions may never be discovered or explained.

Why did the airplane crash? The pilot was a tomato.

69

There's a Christian preist, Jesus, and a Jewish rabi on a boat. They want to go fishing, but they forgot the sunscreen, the bait, and the fishing line. The Christian preist walks across the water and goes and gets the Sunscreen. Jesus walks across the water and gets the bait. The Jewish rabi steps out of the boat and drowns. Jesus turns to the Priest and says, "Do you suppose we should have told about the underwater bridge?"

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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