What do you call a dog with no legs? It doesn't matter it's not going to come to you anyway.

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I'm gonna say something that is going to blow you(away). My Rape Dungeon has carpet.

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How do you stop a pedophile from following you? Throw a fridge at him

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Yo momma so ugly when she joined an ugly contest, they said "Sorry, No Professionals."

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How many Mexicans does it take to screw in a light-bulb? Probably one. Replacing a light-bulb is a pretty simple task which any person (regardless of ethnicity) should be able to do without assistance.

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A young boy is crying in the park, when priest walks up to him -What's the matter son? -My parents died in a horrible car accident 2 weeks ago and now i'm held in an abusive household.

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What did the penis say to the vagina? Nothing, genitalia can't speak.

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How is it possible for a man to get raped? Easy. He lied.

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Josh kissing a girl

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Why was the walrus wearing braces? It wasn't, because it his highly unlikely that people would care about a walrus's dental issues. The walrus would most likely cope with his irregular teeth and move on with its life.

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A dyslexic man walks into a bra drinks a bear and leafs .....

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Wanna hear a great joke? (any answer) Your dad's choice of condom.

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im watching you..

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There was a brunette, a blonde and a red head, They were all great friends!

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How many Alzheimer's patients does it take to screw in a lightbulb? Only one, but he may forget to finish the task due to his Alzheimer's.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? I don't know ask a second grader.

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What's beauitful and disgusting at the same time? Menstration. Jk it's just disgusting.

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the other day i saw a mouse run across my floor. i said "okay" and proceeded with my life

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what do you get when you have unprotected sex with a hooker? an orgasm

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Roses are Red, Violets are Blue, There are so many different endings to this, it makes me just wanna Shoot Myself!

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John: Hey Bill, ORANGE you in the mood to go to a Phillies game? Bill: Yes! So let's make like a banana and raise our potassium levels drastically and leave right away to beat the rush hour traffic.

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What did the boy do when he ran out of Pringles? He killed himself.

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Holy Tulip Answer- Sexy Mofo

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If the covalent bonds of two Hydrogen atoms and one Oxygen atom creates water, which subs are currently on the 5-dollar-foot-long menu at Subway?

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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