So a man walks into a bar, he meets a few friends, has a few beers, and at the end of the night he calls a cab to drive him home

What's Brown and sticky? A stick!

What do you call a black person who was in the U.S. army and survived WWII? A veteran, considering he fought a war and is still alive.

why did the chicken cross the road? the sudden lack of sidewalk dictated as such.

what a filthy dirty mess also dirt

Why did the girl get hit by the bus. Because she was Helen Keller

What starts with "F" and ends in "uck" Firetruck.

What do you get when you cross a chicken and a turkey? Just a sort of mixed bird thing.

What did the hobo get for Christmas? Hypothermia

whats small and sexually confused? YOu

What's a black man's favorite fruit? Clementines.

Why did the Jew cross the road? After looking both ways many times, repeatedly, to make sure there was absolutely no element of possible danger, he concluded that his best option was the cross the road.

why did the Asian by a dog because he was lonely

What's a pirates favorite element the periodic table? Gold.

What did the deaf guy get for Christmas? An iTunes gift card

Why does Eric Clapton use a Mac? Because he prefers Macs.

Why is 6 afraid of 7? 7 was having illicit sexual relationships with 9, of which 6 knew about, but was afraid to inform his wife, 8, who 7 stepped over to get to 9.

A man copied someone else's joke on anti-joke, people looked at it and said "That's funny, but they copied it", then they moved on to the next one.

What did the fish say after it's head was cut off? Nothing, it was a fish.

I saw GESUS and SHE's BLACK

I just flew here from Cleveland, and boy are my arms tired! The people on either side of me were hogging the armrests, so I had to kind of tuck my arms up behind my head and it was very uncomfortable.

How do you keep a woman from driving your car? Shoot her.

Yo Mama is so dumb, that she scored significantly below average on the SAT's.

What do you call a bunch of Cubans on a boat in the Gulf of Mexico? A guy who just so happens to own a boat and is on a fishing trip with his buddies. -Mitch Hastings

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...