'Knock Knock' "Who's there?" 'Nobody. Your schizophrenia has become so bad you can barely make it through a normal day without emotionally collapsing. Your social life has dissolved into a world of fear, and your personal relationships have crumbled away before your eyes. Major depression and anxiety are eating you away. You have nothing left.'

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What is the same about fries chicken and watermelon? There both delicious.

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Steven Yuhasz is so homosexual, he has sexual intercourse with other men and enjoys it. <33

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Pickup line: Hey do you like flowers? Because you stole my flowers.

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What do Bear Grylls drink under breakfast? Tea.

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Why did the pig jump over the farmer? Because he's a stupid idiot.

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What do you call a black guy riding a unicycle? A black guy riding a unicycle.

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Q: How do you kill a Brazilian Blind Electric Ray? A: Killing endangered species is a crime.

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womens rights

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An Englishmen, an Irishman and a Scotsman walk into a bar, and ordered a beer. They later went home and slept. They woke up the next morning with a slight hangover.

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What's worse than 10 babies in one bin? 1 baby in 10 bins.

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How do you confuse a blonde? Beat her with a spatula while in a mankini with a dildo up your ass!

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Knock Knock.

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Why did Helen Keller's dog run away? Someone left the gate open.

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What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? AIDS.

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Say the line below all very fast to get sudden strange sensation... Magic-ish. I like to find threes and peel of their... BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK... ...BARKBARK BARK BARK BARK BARK! Done? Now sit Down, have a little treat Good boy/girl! :Look well at the sun, the jagged Blackness will consume all, Your little star forever but a ever fading memory.

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What ended my last relationship? Oncoming traffic.

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What did the badger say to the mushroom? BADGER BADGER BADGER BADGER BADGER BADGER BADGER BADGER BADGER BADGER MUSHROOM MUSHROOM! BADGER BADGER BADGER BADGER BADGER BADGER BADGER BADGER BADGER BADGER ARGH SNAKE! IT'S A SNAKE...

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What is something you would not normally find in a china cabinet? Japan

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How do you know a baby is dead ? When the dog plays with it more!

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Q: What did the poor man do when he saw a Ferrari? A: He realized that he would really enjoy having the money to buy such a nice vehicle, so he decided to take it upon himself to enroll in night classes. After many years of hard work, he earned a degree and a high-paying position at a large software corporation, and bought his dream car. He often told the story to his children as an example of what hard work and a goal in mind could achieve you. He lived a long, productive life and died fulfilled.

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What's worse than finding jokes that repeat on Anti-Joke.com? AIDS

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What's the difference from an muslim and a christian blonde Religion

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dislike this...please.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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