What do you call a black man that cuts people up and takes their money? A surgeon.

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What do you get when you cross an African, a white person, an Asian and a Spaniard? Society's worst nightmare

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Chuck Norris was once approached by a woman for whom he had to fight a man to obtain all while doing a mundane activity in an unorthodox manner. He promptly declined for he is married and told the man he only fights for self-defense. He proceeded to put his pants on one leg at a time like everybody else.

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A man walked into a bar Ouch.

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how do make a condom fly around the room? Piss it off!

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Your mom is so poor; she doesn't have a job.

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Q: what is blue and floats in a pool? A: a baby Q: what is purple and at the bottom of the pool? A: the baby 5 minutes later

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So last night I was f**king my girlfriend and I flip her over and f**k her up the ass. Later we're sitting having a cigarette when she says, "you know it was pretty presumptuous of you to think you can just flip me over and f**k me up the ass." And I said, "presumptuous!? That's a pretty big word for a 5th grader."

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Q. What's short and black A. A little black kid

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Student: May i go to the toilet? Teacher: What for? Student: To open the chamber of secrets!

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GAY PEOPLE

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Why was Ray Charles always smiling? He was Happy

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A blind man walks into a bar

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A priest, a minister and a rabbi walk into a bar and the bartender says: "Where would you like to sit, gentlemen"?

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Why was Helen Keller such a bad driver? Cause she was blind, def, and mute. Thus making it difficult to drive.

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24

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How many NRA members does it take to change a lightbulb? MORE GUNS!

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That's what she didn't say

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What is the only thing worse than being a smelly Jew in 1944? Being a Jew in 1944 to hit the showers.

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What's the difference between a Jew and a Canoe Well one is a human, beating heart, and the other is a small boat you row in

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Roses are multicoloured Violets are multicoloured Mushrooms are great

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What did the brick say to the wall? Nothing, as they are both inanimate objects that lack knowledge and the sense to speak.

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I dont often wash my hands in the bathroom but when i do its so people dont think im gross.

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Two muffins are sitting in an oven. One says, "It is quite hot in here." This is a lie. Neither of the muffins spoke because in reality, Muffins are not only inanimate objects, they are not humans, and therefore they do not have the ability to speak in a comprehensible language.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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