What's green and has wheels? Grass. I lied about the wheels.

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What's worse than the holocaust? Finding half a worm in your apple.

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There once was a plain Cheerio. He has a decent life with a low paying job and an apartment. One day, he decided to make his life more fun and started going to parties. He met some women and had a good time. He was happier and was soon promoted at work. The next day, he woke up and tasted himself, only to discover that he was now a Honey-nut Cheerio. He continued to go to parties and met a girl that eventually became his girlfriend. He became a manager at work and moved into an expensive condo. The next day, he woke up and tasted himself and was a Frosted Cheerio. He then quit his job and opened a club, where he became the most popular Cheerio in town. All guys wanted to be him, girls with him. At one party, his girlfriend asked him for some punch. He went to the kitchen but couldn't find any. There was no punch-line.

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Tom buys his wife Mary the latest Eco friendly car. The car is said to get well over 100 miles on a tank of gas. A week later, Tom is stunned to learn that while Mary was driving to the supermarket the car ran out of gas. The tank was full and Mary only drove 5 miles. How is this possible? Mary was involved in a horrible car accident. The gas tank immediately emptied and set fire to Mary and her baby.

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why did the chicken cross the street? he couldn't, he lives in a rural area on a farm where there are no streets

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knock knock whos there boo boo who? stop crying its only me! its not you, my mom has cancer, my dad was killed in a car accident, my pregnant wife has been murdered, and my uncle touches me.

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Want to know how the dyslexic man with no left arm and no left leg? All left

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A married couple is arguing over the temperature in their house. The wife wants it at 62 degrees and the husband wants it at 74. What should they do? Nothing while they are arguing their daughter decides to put it at 32 and freeze them to death

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How do you leave a gay guy in suspense? How? ......................

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what do you do when see a young girl crying on the swingset? ask her kindly to move, as you would like a turn

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whats worse then biting into a worm and finding an apple??? getting raped up the butt by a giant tiger!

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you know whats better than lemonade? sex

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how do you make Chuck Norris laugh? tell him an anti-joke.

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A blind Man walks into a Bar. A young man quickly runs over to him and helps him up.

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What do you hear when the world trade center collapsed?, no seriously I wasn't even three yet.

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What do you call an Ethiopian with a yeast infection? Quarter pounder with cheese.

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why didnt the kid get anything for christmas? santa exploded

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Why can't a T-Rex clap? Because they're extinct

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whats long ,hard and full of sea men ? a sumureen

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What did God say when he made the first black person? I have just added a significant element of diversity to the human species. Intolerance between ethnicities will surely prove to be an obstacle in societal progression, creating hardships for many. I know this because I am God.

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Knock knock Who's there? Oh. I was just making sound effects.

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Why did Suzy fall off the swing? She had no arms. Knock knock... Who's there? Not Suzy.

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What's similar about a black person and a white person? They're both black, apart from the white person

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Your mom is so old that she most likely will die soon.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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