A: Do you want to hear a joke? B: Yes. A: Thanks.

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Why was Timmy's hair shaved? He had cancer and was going though Chemo.

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hating his life and his job, the man leaves work early and while he is in the elavator he has thoughts about killing himself after returning to his apartment he turns on the TV and grabs his gun out of the drawer. sitting in a chair with a gun to his head he looks at the TV and realizes that his office building has just been hit by a 747 piloted by Al-Quida members. Suddenly the man realizes that maybe he has something to live for and decides not to kill himself.

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Why are black people good at basketball? They practice

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-How do you pull a prank on Helen Keller? -Stick a plunger in the toilet!

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What did one tree say to the other tree? Nothing, trees can't talk.

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What's smelly and Dirty? Someone who hasn't shower in a reasonably long time.

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Why didn't the boy run the marathon? He was cripple.

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What's worse than a bee sting? Two bee stings. What's worse than two bee stings? The Holocaust. What's worse than the Holocaust? Three bee stings.

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A- Knock knock. B- Who's there? A- The interrupting doctor. B- The interrupt- A- You have cancer.

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What's the difference between unicorns and black people? Years of slavery.

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Why did the girl drop her ice cream? Because seeing as a bus was heading straight toward her, she quickly decided to sacrifice her frozen treat and dodge the oncoming vehicle in order to save her life.

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Why didn't Suzie ride her bike? Suzie's mother aborded her. She was never born.

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What did the man say to the jew? How are jew?

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What do you call a muslim who is not a terrorist ? A muslim

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Why did the little girl fall off the swing? She didn't have any arms.

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what do you call a black guy with a nice car? most probably a rapper or professional athlete, however there is also a great chance that he is a doctor of philosophy and well educated.

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Why did the black man not tip his waiter? Because she provided terrible service and was undeserving.

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As Vanilla Ice once said, "If there's a problem ill resolve it."

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Two colleague janitors sit next to each other in the coffee room, one says to the other: About yesterday... I checked three times and it looks pretty normal. Sorry... I wasn't around to hear the question the other posed the day before, but I heard it's supposed to be pretty funny with this answer. So... Less is better then none, right?

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Knock knock. Who's there? You're adopted. You're adopt...wait what?

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Why did the girl talk to her computer? Because she was Skyping with some faraway friends. Why were her friends far away? She was sent to the moon. Why was she sent to the moon? Because she tried to create eternal night.

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what did the tree say to the person? nothing trees cant talk

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A horse walked into a bar, and the bartender asked, "Why the long face?". The horse replied, "It's evolutionarily efficient to have an elongated skull so that I can eat vegetation with ease."

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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