what do you call a fish with no gills? Dead

Sometimes i like to paint myself red and then curl up into a ball and pretend i'm a tomato.

What has four wheels and flies? A pile of poop that's on four wheels.

I went to the zoo the other day, there was only one animal there and it was a dog. It was a shitzoo

Why did the serial killer need the knife? He needed to butter his bread

A man saw a dinosaur yesterday. He had a very nice time at the museum.

A Chinese man and an american lived together. The Chinese man said to the american man, "I'm going to walk the dog." The American said "OK." Later that night they were eating dinner. The American said to the Chinese man, "I don't think that I've had this meat before. What is it?" The Chinese man replied, "The dog." The American, surprised, spewed out the food he was eating. "THE DOG!?" he yelled, shocked. The Chinese man replied, "Yes, I TOLD you I was going to wok the dog!"

what do u call 2 puerto rician men playing basketball? won on won

Q: Whats A Schoolbus Full Of Black Children??? A: A Rotten Banana!!!

Roses are Red Violets are Blue No they're not They're purple

Knock Knock Who's there? Your physician, you're going to die.

A priest, a Muslim and a Rabbi sit next to each other on a plane they say nothing to each other during the flight and reach their destinations safely.

My brother gave my mom AIDS. My mom gave my dad AIDS. My dad gave my dog AIDS. My dog gave me AIDS. I gave my sister AIDS. My sister called the police because of the wild case of AIDS.

How did the old man climb the hill? He didn't.

What do you get when you put a frog in a paper shredder? Harshly punished by the Animal Humane Society

:D STORY TIME! :D ... :D So once upon a time there was a... :) Uhm... :\ I forgot... Sorry :(

Woah again Nero, you are so wise... I love you, I really do. If someone can and has already changed the world for the better, its you. No wonder people believe you have superhuman abilities, I used to think so too, but I think I understand what humans can do on another level now, you did that, thank you.

John walked up to his dad one morning and shouted, "Dad, it's my birthday!" Dad said, "Cool, how old are you?" John says, "I'm seven!" Dad tells him to go downstairs and tell his grandpa. John runs down and says, "Grandpa, it's my birthday, guess how old I am!" Grandpa sticks his hand in John's pants and sticks his thumb into his anus. As he pulls his hand out, he pinches his penis. Grandpa says, "You're seven." John says, "How did you know?" Grandpa says, "I heard you tell your dad upstairs."

Roses are red Violets are blue Im bad with colours Nice tits

Why did the Asian boy drop his milk? Because he had a stroke.

Why is this website funny? Because it has jokes on it.

Roes are red, Violets are blue, This poem doesn't rhyme, You're entire family has died. The plane that they were on went down due to a flock of geese getting sucked into the engine. They were visiting you for your twenty fifth birthday and wanted to surprise you. there were no survivors.

guess what I'm going to Spain on my holidays

A black guy and a Mexican are in a car, who's driving? The taxi driver.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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