Did you hear about the constipated mathematician who broke his calculator? He went to the shops and bought some laxatives and a new calculator.

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How long did it take for Michael to screw in the lightbulb? 37 minutes. Michael has cerebral palsy.

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I'm sn otter

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What do you call a remote that does not work? a remote that does not work.

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Two horses were discussing their racing records. The first said, "In my whole life I had won ten races." The second horse says, "Well, I've won twelve of those!" A greyhound trotting by chimes in, "Not bragging guys, but in my career, I've won twenty!" "Unbelievable!" exclaimed both horses. "It's a talking dog!"

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i know the best knock knock joke! you start! other person: knock knock me: whos there ........

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What is worse that a bee sting? 2 bee stings what is worse that 2 bee sting? Kony what is wose than Kony? 3 bee stings what is worse than 3 bee sting? being allergic to bee stings

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Q: Why did the Jew fit in with the White people? A: Because he, and his compatriots, have accepted the view of Judaism as a religion, and perhaps a lifestyle -- but not a race.

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SC Johnson a Family Company

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Q: How did the black man get the white man's money? A: He walked up, politely asked if he could borrow some money, and told him he would pay him back tomorrow.

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Good luck on your finals everyone!

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Why is John gay? Because he enjoys the penis

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What`s the best part about twenty-three year olds? there are twenty of them

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Roses are black, violets are black. I'm blind.

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Whats worse than breaking your pencil? Getting a cactus shoved up your ass.

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Why was the boy not feeling well? He swallowed a piano.

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Three head lice are drinking beer on a scalp, then they are killed by a high strength medical shampoo.

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What is black and white and red all over? A zebra that has been shot, because poaching is quite common in many African savannas.

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https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=LPFTeHEsAS4 You will not be disappointed.

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How did the guy survive the plane crash? He didnt, He died like everybody else.

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A: Knock knock knock B: "Who's there?" A: Knock knock knock B: "Who's there!?" A: Knock knock knock B: "God dammit who's there!?" A: "Penny?"

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Someone threw a cigarette at me today... What a fag.

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I cant find my anti-jokes this is also one

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An impolite guy walks into a bar... and doesn't apologize to the bar.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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