What's white and moves at a glacial pace? A glacier.

why did the chicken cross the road? there was a black man walking towards him

Why Was Mary Short? She Had No Legs.

Why did the chicken cross the road? He wanted a car to kill him so he can get to the other side with his wife and son. In other news,I had a very nice chicken cutlet and scrambled egg dinner.

A cow went into a meadow and ate some grass. Some time later he wandered off.

What's funnier than 24? My life.

Why did the duck eat the chicken noodle soup? The duck was told that if he ate the chicken noodle soup on Fear Factor he would win $10,000. What he failed to realize was that he forgot to sign page 16 on the episode contract and did not win any money and was sued by Campbell's soup for copyright infringement.

A black guy walked in to a gas station, walked up to the counter and payed for his items with his debit card.

Why was Sally crying because a flock Of seagulls just took a shit in her head

what did luke say to darth vader? Can i borrow ur car please.

I'd type a joke about dicks but it's too long.

"Hey want to hear the best knock-knock joke ever." "Sure." "Ok you start." "Knock-knock." "Whos there?" "..........."

what's worse than jamming a finger in a door the holocaust what's worse than the holocaust jamming 2 fingers in a door

What do you get when you cross an ugly hobo and a diabetic? Don't talk about your mom like that.

Why is a giraffe's neck so long? Because it's head's so far from his body.

What has legs but can't walk? A table...or a dog with four broken legs.

Why is Helen Keller a bad driver? Because her inability to see or hear makes her an extremely dangerous road hazard.

Q. What do you call a black priest? A. Holy Shit

How come George hit his face when he fell? He had no arms.

A young Asian boy got a B on his test. He went home an showed his parents even though he was nervous of their reaction. They told him that a B was a good grade and put it on the fridge. After that he began to gradually flunk each class one by one because of his parent's inability to push him to be better. He is now homeless and an alcoholic.

The cream, it is coming

Roses are blue Violets are polka dot I suck at rhyming Pandas

Why the long face? My face isn't long, it's the same shape as everyone else, retard. I meant why are you sad. I'm not sad.

A blonde, a brunnette, and a red head all jump from the top of a building. They all land at the same time because of Newton's 3rd Law

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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