What's the difference between a car and a sack of dead babies? I don't keep a car in my garage.

how do you make a plumber cry? you pull its pants up

Why did the student fail his test? He forget to study for it the night before.

what did the kid with no arms and no legs get for Christmas Cancer

Why did the chicken cross the road? The question just posed is unanswerable, as in order to state the reasoning for the chicken crossing the road, one would have to assume the a chicken has a concept of 'road'. As the chicken is an avant, we can safely say that it has no need of pavements/ sidewalks or roads. As a result, it cannot possibly have an incentive for doing so. Consider the following hypothetical analogy: you are walking in a forest, and you unknowingly cross another animals scent trail. You cannot possibly say WHY you walked across the scent trail, as you didn't know it was there. You can state your reasoning for walking in the first place, but not for crossing that specific scent trail. In conclusion, this question is unanswerable, due to the chicken's lack of knowledge about roads.

Q: What did the police officer do when he saw another man getting assaulted. A: Went into a corner and started fapping to it.

knock knock. who's there? I am. I am who? I am pregnant.

Chuck Norris was once approached by a woman for whom he had to fight a man to obtain all while doing a mundane activity in an unorthodox manner. He promptly declined for he is married and told the man he only fights for self-defense. He proceeded to put his pants on one leg at a time like everybody else.

What do you call two Mexicans playing basketball? A bad decision because soccer is in their blood

Men's rights.

A blonde, the pope, and a young kid are in a crashing airplane and there's only one parachute. But by the time any of them equips it, the plane hits the ground and they all die.

What's faster than a black man with a TV? Light.

For New Years I want to spend more time with my... Video Games

You can tell I have many friends because I got them to like this.

Your mom goes to college. Actually, she graduated a while back!

A: Who are you? B: A random guy who walked into your house A: Oh sorry, I keep forgetting your name.

Q: Why did Little Suzie fall off of the swing? A: She had no arms. Knock knock! Who's there? Not Little Suzie!

Roses are Red, Violets are Blue I have ADD Check out this flashlight!

What's red & is bad for your face? A brick.

what's funnier than 1 Mecican? 2 Mexicans

Q: What did the boy with no arms and no legs get for Christimas? A: Cancer.

I see you driving 'Round town with the girl I love And I'm like, Haiku!

Omg you bought a Prius? Children in Africa are starving and could have used that money to buy food.

bangers and mash?

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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