Roses are red, violets are blue, This is false, Violets are purple.

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whats black and has 3 legs? a spider with 5 missing legs.duh.

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A horse walks into a bar. The bartender says "why the long face", the horse said nothing; because it is a horse.

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A man wins 1 million dollars on the pokies. He goes home and tells his wife and kids about the big win. The next day the man goes go the casino and and loses the 1 million as he is addicted to gambling

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There are no stupid Questions just stupid people

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What was the fly doing in the soup? Nothing, the guy ordered pizza.

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Why was the Pizza Delivery boy crying? He was sad.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because it felt like it.

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CAVE JOHNSON.

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why did the kitten drink its milk? because it doesnt have a motor so has no need for petrol.

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John has 5 brownies, 3 chocolate bars, and 62 cookies. What does John have now? Diabetes, John has Diabetes

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What would Micheal Jackson do if he were alive today? THRILLER! THRILLER! THRILLERS NIGHT!

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Q: What did jerry sandusky do with little boys alone? A: Teach them how to play football

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What is the definition of a shame (as in "that's a shame")? When a picnic is postponed due to rain, or hired entertainment becomes unavailable at the last minute due to illness, or a book ends badly having started out well.

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Why did little Timmy get absolutely nothing for Christmas? He is Jewish.

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Why did the Democrat cross the road? Because the glorious leader ordered it for all minions

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Why did the girl have an abortion? Because she wanted a burger.

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Goodbye Nero, it is good to see that you are the man that we still admire so much, except better, wiser than we thought you would be, stronger, if broken inside by unhappiness, you cannot change this world into what it could have been, and neither should you take that burden upon your shoulders anymore.

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why did the girl chug her tub of frosting? she had no spoon

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How do you kill Justin Beiber? By stabbing him 38 times in the chest.

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A white man and a black woman walk into a bar, they both fell in love and lived happily together until their 25 year old son had gotten in too a car crash Luckily their son lived

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Why was the chicken mad? Because he was sick of everyone questioning him even when he crossed the road.

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What's worse than finding your whole family dead? Nothing. Finding your family dead is terrible.

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whats worse than flunking math? death.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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