Why did the chicken cross the road? So he could be slaughtered and eaten for dinner.

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Knock Knock, Who's there? Banana. Banana who? The Holocaust.

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How can you make a Russian happy? Giving him two tickets for him and his wife to Disneyworld.

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Bill: Knock, Knock. Sean: Who's there? Bill: It's your neighbor, Bill Walters, from across the street. Sean: Oh, hey Bill, how are you and Margie? Bill: Oh, I'm doing fine, but Margie just got out of the hospital for a broken arm. Sean: My gosh, what happened. Bill: She was just loading the Halloween decorations down from the attic while I wasn't home and fell. She's fine though; it was only a minor fracture. Sean: Well thank goodness she alright. Bill: Anyway, I came over to return those hedge clippers I borrowed from you last month. Sean: Oh, thank you. How did they work? Bill: Just great once I gave them a coat of oil. It was a big job... I haven't trimmed those bushes in three years. Sean: No problem, I almost never use them myself. Well I better get back to Jeanie...I'm helping her make dinner. Bill: Alright, Well thanks again.

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A man walks into a chiropractor. The chiropractor asked whats wrong with you? The man replies My boner has scoliosis.

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What do you call man with no limbs or a head? Your neighbor.

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I regret everything.....

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How do you get a giraffe in a fridge? Open the Door, put the giraffe in, close the door How do you get an elephant in a fridge Open the door, take the giraffe out, put the elephant in, close the door There is an animal meeting, one animal doesn't show up. Which animal didn't come? The Elephant, it's still in the fridge You come across a crocodile infested river, how do you get across? You swim across, the crocodiles are at the meeting, Weren't you listening?

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Light travels faster than sound, thats why people look smart until they talk.

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Biggest lie in America: Sorry, that was my last stick of gum.

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What did the man say when he found a bar of soap in his mailbox? Why is there soap in my mailbox?

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what happened when glen haire jumped of a high building? he died.

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What did the black man buy at the store? Nothing he has no money

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Why did the woman call 911? Fire.

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What goes up a hill with 4 legs and comes down with 3? A horse, which, upon reaching the top of the hill, has one of its legs chopped off, which is when the horse proceeds down the hill.

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DARK FACT: A ratchet black chick would say that was racist.

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What's the difference between a Mexican and a bench? Almost everything.

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c======3

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What's worse than finding an apple in your wo- wait, what?!

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Why was the little boy so bad at the piano? It was his first time playing it.

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"the president is black, my lambo's blue..." no hes not, hes bi-racial.

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How do you find your way out of the impossible maze? You don't.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because the chicken was trying to escape from the sad and depressing environment that surrounded him on the side he thus came from. Alas, he did not know that he would be soon hit by a drunk truck driver, who would also die, in a bright explosion of morbid flames and screams.

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What's Casey Anthony doing now that she's not in prison? She's actually living life as an upstanding citizen in Florida.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops