Q: Why did the Mexican jump over the fence? A: He went to go retrieve the ball that was kicked in his neighbor's yard. Afterwords, he continued playing soccer with his friends.

What's the difference between a hooker and an onion? The hooker is a human being whereas the onion is a vegetable.

Why did the chicken cross the road? It wanted to.

Why couldn't Billy the bird fly? He was an ostrich, ostriches can't fly.

why did the chicken cross the street? so it could throw a fridge at you, you are very loud at night for some reason and you wake everyone up. the chicken then goes home to watch gay porn videos.

why has kallum just changed clothes to speak to a counsellor because he's socially awkward and has no peers

Why are there so many smiths in the phonebook? Because they all have phones.

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A little boy came runing to his mum' mummy...can a little girl have ababy? Mom reply no...so, the boy ran out and told his frnd 'we can play naked again'.,

What do you get when you mate an elephant with a rhino? Not much of anything except inter-species animal sex, considering the fact that the two do not share enough genetic material to create any sort of offspring.

I hate you.

a priest and a jewish guy walk into a bar. they both drink as expected and go home to their families

What did the Irisman say to the bartender? Don't know? i don't speak Irish?

A morbidly overweight baby eats horse poop and dies a slow horrible death

What did the robet say to the centipede? Stop being a centipede. Its funny becuase the robot had no arms.

I forgot what i was gonna say

What's longer then Kim Kardashian's Wedding? 73 days.

Q. What time is your appointment with the Chinese dentist? A. 20 past 4

Knock, Knock. Who's there? Dave. Dave who? Dave proceeds to break into tears as his grandmother's Alzheimers has progressed to the point where she can no longer remember him.

Why did the chicken cross the road? Because the chicken was trying to escape from the sad and depressing environment that surrounded him on the side he thus came from. Alas, he did not know that he would be soon hit by a drunk truck driver, who would also die, in a bright explosion of morbid flames and screams.

Why did the hipster burn his mouth? He ate the mac and cheese before it was cool.

Why was the chair sad? It wasn't, for chairs do not posses the proper attributes to feel emotions such as depression.

Roses are red, and many other colors too.

What did the prisoner receive on his 44th birthday? Well obviously all mail in prisons is checked, but nothing dangerous was found. He received a book on different types of steam engines (he is a railway fan), some chocolate (galaxy caramel, which is his favourite), a crossword challenge book (he gets bored in his cell) and the anti joke book.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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