What is worse than finding a worm in your apple? Finding Barney the purple dildo!

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Why don't they sell pharmaceuticals in the rain forest? Because it is too sparsely populated and not economically viable.

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Knock, knock. Who's there? Polite cow who recognizes normal social cues and civilly waits for its turn to contribute to a conversation. Polite cow who recognizes normal social cues and civilly waits for its turn to contribute to a conversation who? Moo.

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what do you call a martial arts instructor with a medical degree who's name is Richard? Craig... just kidding, Richard

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Why did the baby cross the road? Because it most likely saw a shiny object and wanted to play with it. Luckily there was no cars passing at the time but the parents should be more careful to keep thier child in sight and away from peril. That and the baby found a small piece of glass that could be harmful to it....

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what do you call a black man sleeping on a park bench at 2 in the morning? Homeless

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Q. How do you break into a store that's closed? A. You walk in, I was lying about it being closed.

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If life gives you lemons, you are probably suffering from hallucinations.

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ObamaCare

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A drunk man walks out of a bar, goes home and abuses his wife.

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Why did the squirrel fall out of the tree? Because it was dead. Why did the second squirrel fall out of the tree? Because it was stapled to the first one. Why did the third squirrel fall out of the tree? Because it thought it was a game. Why did the tree fall over? Because it thought it was a squirrel.

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bum sex lol

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What do you get when mix an orange with juice? Orange juice.

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Yo mama is so fat, she had to get liposuction.

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roses are red, violets are red, my garden is on fire

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What gets louder as it gets smaller? A baby in a trash compactor.

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Is it a bird, Is it a plane, I don't know what it is but it's heading straight for the World Trade Centre

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i went through your mum like a plane on 9,11

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amy mcguire is soo amazing! i love her

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what did the 3 hispanic men say to the fat guy? you're in our seats

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Sorry boss

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What do you call a black person with food stamps? A freeloader.

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Whats black and is on sale in shops? Blackberries.

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Why did ned fall out of the tree? Because he was hit by a koala.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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