Do you know the joke about the two guys who went to Paris ? Me neither.

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"Doctor, I seem to have a large horn-like growth protruding from my nose". "Well, yes, that is because you are a rhinoceros".

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I am paralyzed from the neck down.

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why did the monkey fall? he got hit by a train

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Why did the girl throw butter out the window? She was suffering from an epileptic seizure.

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Why did the soviet plane crash? It was joseph Stallin

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A man walks into a bar. Three weeks later he gets a liver transplant.

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What did the lonely old man get on valentines day? Nothing, because his wife died of cancer two years ago.

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What did the Jewish man say to the Shia faction Muslim man? Even though we have different views on god and religion I value your friendship more than my religous views.

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whats the difference between a pile of dead babies and a red corvette? i don't have a red corvette in my garage

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My phone rang. So I answered it.

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Why did helen keller's dog run away? He lost track of his destination and got lost.

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Roses are Black, Violets are Black, I am Ray Charles

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What's the difference between a ghost and a dolphin? A ghost isn't a dolphin.

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What did I wake upto this morning that was white , cold and 2 inches deep? My tiny flaccid penis.

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Mary had a little lamb, its heart was black as coal, it crept into her room one night and ate her f***ing soul

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What do you call cheese that is not yours? The fact that you do not own the cheese doesnt change its name

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What do you call a boomerang that doesn't come back? A stick.

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Why did the small 12 year old run away which a chicken. He felt like it and he was carrying bread which the chicken was allergic to.

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Why does an elephant lay on it's back with its feet in the air? To trip birds.

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CNN has posted that the recent death of osama bin laden is comparable to decapitating a snake when really it is more akin to bisection of a worm.

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What was the reason for the confused looking woman staring at the can of frozen Apple juice for twenty minutes? Some cans are difficult to open: The little ring bit comes off when you pull it, and then you have to work out a new way to open it, which takes patience and ingenuity.

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Why did the boat sink I shot a missile at it

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Why did Susie fall off the swing?? ShE had no arms. Knock knock... Whose there? Not Susie

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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