A Mexican, and Arab and an American are on a plane. The the plane is going down. It hits a mountain and crashes. But there was also a lot of other people on the plane. Families, children, loved ones. It was huge a disaster.

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A duck walks into a bar, and the bartender says "what'll it be?" The bartender is then sent to a medical clinic after letting several wild animals into his bar and proceeding to feed them alcoholic drinks. He is diagnosed with schizophrenia.

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thermodynamics?

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Why did the chicken cross the road. ... So he could be hit by a car.

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Violets are red. Roses are blue. I am drunk, and i'm about to spew.

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a man walked into a bar.... when i say bar i mean a metal pole, the man suffered from concussion

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A black guy and an apple fall out of a tree, which one hits the ground first? They both hit the ground roughly at the same time, because the acceleration due to gravity is constant.

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If a tree falls in the woods, and no one is around to hear it - Is there still a woman in the kitchen?

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This is hypothetical remember, just examples with no roots in real life events. The problem with your former employee, was that he would easily have played the victim, certain organizations would have paid him a fortune for the intel he had collected, and surely also agreed to let him walk away, and get you and your small (relatively) crack team death penalty on the spot, just like the underground, you would have been branded terrorists simply because certain people would have earned billions by doing so. The wizard would most likely have gone free, as long as he shared every tiny bit of info, then the cops, the feds, would have blamed it all on you for being his supervisor, you would not have survived the ordeal, trust me.

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whats the difference between a pair of shoes, and a computer. alot.

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Don't you hate when you finger your belly button and your nipples exploed?

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What's the worlds most popular burger? The Krabby Patty

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-Knock Knock - Who's there? - Child Protective Services, we have multiple reports of you abusing several of your children...

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How do you make time fly? Well! You cannot really make time fly. Imean, yeah, iguess it feels like time flies when your having fun, but it moves just as fast as always!

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Give this a thumbs up cuz mi spelin is baad

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Why didn't the family go through the door? Because it was a window.

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What starts with 'P' and ends with 'orn'? Popcorn.

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What did one hater say to the other hater? I hate you.

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How do you stop a black guy from drowning? Take your foot off his head.

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A black guy and a few other white guys steal a keg. They then proceed to have an awesome party consisting of extreme inebriation and a massive orgy.

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Me and my pet lion just took a trip to his homeland of africa. It is also worthwhile to note I'm a chronic liar.

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Why did the scarecrow get promoted? He was outstanding in his field

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How do you make a person who wins the lottery sad? You threaten to kill his family.

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when i'm away from home i sometimes get love sick, well they call it chlamydiae.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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