Why did the girl break her leg? Because I pushed down the staircase.

ask me if im a tree! NO!!!!!!!!!!!!!

What's good about sex with twenty-three year olds? There's twenty of them.

What do elephants and grapes have in common? They are both purple arpart from the elephant, which is grey. I lied about it being purple

Ay Bee Cee Dee Ey Ef Gee Haych Eye Jay Kay El Em En Ow Pee Queue Our Es Tee You Vee Doubleyou Ex Why Zed Now you know your ABC, come along and sing with me!

Why did the Chicken cross the road? It didn't, it was in a chicken pen.

Whats worse then the quote "Do it, hit her!" The quote "Do it, Hitler!"

Why do I staple a mans mouth to his penis. Because I wanted to

Yo momma's so poor, that when she went to the soup kitchen, she got food.

This is no joke. Well, I did warn you.

But there's a sound Dumbledore knows... What does the Fawkes say?

What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? Dumb jokes, now shut up.

What has 4 eyes and can't see. Blind siamese twins!

What do Elephants never forget? 9/11

Roses are red, Violets are blue, Tulips can be of multiple colors.

Why couldn't the turtle swim? Because he went too close to an oil spill, the petroleum got into his mouth and coated his lungs and he is now dead.

I need a good anti joke....

What would you do if I walked onto your property and started to smash up your mailbox with a sledge hammer? You would be very scared and most probably call the police.

How do you get a clown off a swing? Hit him with an ax.

Whats the difference beetween a pilgrim and a jack-o-lantern? Jack-o-lanters didn't discover america.

Did you hear about the woman that died of a heart attack? More oxygen for us!

Why did the man lose the a race? 'Cause he has no legs

How many babies does it take to paint a wall? Depends how hard you throw them.

Why did the chicken cross the road? Beacause the destination he was trying to reach was across this road Notice how he tried This is because he got hit by a car but know one cares for him

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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