Why was the little girl sad? Why???? Because an elephant stamped on her, and shat on her.

What does a bird and a human have in common? They both use long, hard sticks.

How do you get a girls number? Grow some balls and ask for it.

what's the difference between rice and an asian? one is a food.

From a picture, it is difficult to tell the difference between an apatosaurus and a diplodocus.

You.

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What do you call an Asian pilot? A pilot...

Whats worse than biting into an apple and finding half a worm? Half a shit.

What did the fish say when he ran into a cement wall? ....Nothing fish don't run What did the fish say when he swam into a cement wall? ...Damn

How did the man die? A gorilla raped him

Davey Peterson.

Question: What did Mr. Reeves say. Answer: Nothing

When is a door not a door? When it's a pair of titties!

why did the girl fall off the slide? she was pushed, by her dad...

Roses are red Violets are red I'm bleeding quite profusely I should proably go to the hospital

What do You call a man with no arms or legs? Dead, He died of blood loss 3 hours ago

ring ring,Who is? you'r face.you'r face how?you'r but hole face.

What do you call a man wearing a costume similar to a stereotypical ghost? A mentally disabled man on halloween.

Rebecca Black starts to sing a song, and when breaking out into her annoying chorus, we realize that it's not about the days of the week.

A man walks into a bar. We see him as he approaches the register wearing a dark hoody. The surveillance camera seen here catches a glimpse of the man's face appearing to be a white male with mustache and beard. As you can see the man opens the register and takes the money before the bartender can get to him. If you have any information about this crime please call crime stoppers at 1-800-GET-HELP. In other news, the DOW JONES reached a record high today as investors in China begin working on keeping the economy from plundering.

How many midgets does it take to screw in a light bulb? One. Midgets are capable of doing an average person's everyday task. Unless they have autism, then they might as well die.

Why did the teacher need sunglasses? Because she taught in a classroom with a very big window and the sun kept getting in her eyes.

What's round and orangey? An orange.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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