A man walks into a bar... who cares what happens after that Charlie Sheen is winning and Osama Bin Laden is dead

Waffles ate my grandma

Q: what's red and covers an elementary school wall? A: a red crayon

What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? Finding a nest of worms in your apple.

What do you call one white guy surrounded by 10 BIG black guys? The most common NFL Offence

knock knock whose there? banana banana who? knock knock? whose there? banana knock knock? whose there? banana

Whats worse than eating a worm? Haveing a worm die in your penis.

What did the frog say when he heard his family was dead? "ribbit"

Q: What's worse than biting into an apple and finding a worm? A: Being caught by the store manager, arrested, convicted, and thrown into jail for petty theft and then getting anally raped for the next 3 months all because you wanted to check an apple without paying for it.

Why did the man write with a pen on paper? Because he was writing a novel.

There were 3 children: Flower, Petal and Fridge. Flower asked, "Mum, why is my name Flower?" to which she replied "Because a flower was the first thing to fall on you when you were born." Petal asked, "Mum, why is my name Petal?" to which she replied "Because a petal was the first thing to fall on you when you were born." Fridge said, "Herp derp dur" to which Fridge's mother replied "Shut up, Fridge."

Why do They call a horse a horse? Because They speak English.

welcome to anti joke.com. you were expecting an anti joke wernt you.

Why is Jesus not real? Because Chuck Norris is still alive.

I do like haikus even when they are random refrigerator

Why did the teenager turn in his work on time? He chose not to procrastinate.

What happened to the boy who lost his arm? He got on suprisingly well in life considering he has the use of only one arm, and got a terrific job. He managed to meet a woman, , and he was a generally happy guy. He lived to a great age, and he, nor anyone around him, ever thought of him as different or disabled. It's good to hear a happy anti joke once in a while isn't it guys?

Q. Why couldn't Billy see the pirate movie? A. Because his mom didn't let him.

Joay impistato is a fig

Roses are red My name is Dave This poem makes no? sense Microwave

Q:What is harder than nailing ten dead babies to a tree? A:Nailing one dead baby to ten trees.

If life gives you melons. You may be dyslexic.

Why can't woman be cokcy? Because that don't have one (Sorry for the sexist joke, to who it may concern)

I'm so stupid that I'm posting on Anti Jokes!

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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