what can jump higher than a tree? anything that can jump because everyone knows that trees cannot jump.

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sssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssLOLIAMINTHESIDEBAR:Dyouaregaylol

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Knock. Knock. Who's there? Pizza guy. Just a minute, I have to grab my wallet.

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Knock knock. "Who's there?" I am deaf. "I am deaf who?" What?

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Q: Why did Megan Fox cross the road? A: Because she was running from a giant Decepticon!!! Why else!!!???

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:)I will always assist you in whatever you ever want. :(I want to kill you!

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What would make African women very happy? food and healthcare for their kids, and a proper education.

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What did the tampon say to the other tampon? Nothing, they were both stuck up bitches.

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a jerk that i knew was in a bar. he was about to drive home. at first i tried to stop him until he was sober. instead he punched me in the face. then i dared him to drive home as fast as possible. he died that night... i texted him all the way...

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Swag.

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How do you make a model ugly? you shoot her in the face.

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What's the difference between your mother and a mallard with a cold? One's a sick duck; the other regrets having you as a child.

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What is grey and smells like sand? A Rock.

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Whats worse than finding a worm in your apple? -death -kidney failure -gall stones -getting in an automobile accident -getting struck by lightning -getting sodomized -embezzlement -deception -HIV/AIDS -illness of any nature -world hunger -the holocaust -Zimbabwe's economy -getting hit by a train -getting hit by a bus -the hives -getting bit by an alligator -head injuries -being arrested -childhood obesity -sexual predators -highly impoverished areas -losing a finger -getting hit with a bat -corruption -general rudeness -being lost in the woods -contracting a sexually transmitted virus -teen pregnancy -murder -rape -robbery -going blind -losing a child -falling down a well -bestiality -identity fraud -massacres -racism -genocide -mental disabilities in children -bullying -food poisoning -stepping on a nail -eugenics -the mass murder, rape, and theft of the land from the Native people of America -forced assimilation -slavery -brain deteriorating illness -matricide -prostitution - accidentally repeating yourself -prostitution -domestic violence -animal cruelty -pollution -deforestation -global warming -losing your life savings -still birth -oppressive leaders -physical conflicts -world wars and other military conflict -the situation in Rwanda -Inequality in treatment of women in middle eastern countries -auto theft -tax evasion -terrorism -being diagnosed with cancer -clinical depression -prostitution -finding two worms in your apple

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Wanna hear a joke? Joe Jonas.

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Why are black people afraid of tigers? Because tigers eat people

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Knock Knock Who's there? The police. The police who? Sir, your wife has been killed. Please open the door so that we may discuss this matter. The man then opens the door and listens to the tale of how a disgruntled worker opened fire in a grocery store, killing 13 people including his wife. Unable to cope with this and the fact both his parents passed away earlier that year he later hangs himself soon after the police leave.

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Three men sat at a pub, it reminded them of this joke they once heard

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What's worse then falling off a buliding? Falling of a higher building.

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<3 ... it looks more like scissors than a heart...

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why did the nazi eat the jew? He didn't

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When Hitler was a girl she had hyjenical warts and when she got older she had beast cancer.

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Holocaust jokes are not funny. My Grandpa died in the Holocaust... He fell off of the guard tower.

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How do you stop a dog from humping your leg? Suck its dick.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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