Did you hear about the blonde who jumped out off a bridge? She was clinically depressed and took her own life because of her terribly low self-esteem.

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Person 1: Your Ugly Person 2: Your mom's ugly

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"I can't wait to eat this bagle!" "Yes you can." "Yeah, I guess you're right."

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Why did the monkey fall from the tree? Gravitational force acted upon the monkey who was not holding on to any branch.

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? Because it was dead

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Roses are red, violets are blue, why am i even talking to you?

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One day a horse goes to a bakery store and asks the shopkeeper for a fresh loaf of bread. Surprised at the request the shopkeeper asked - White bread or whole wheat? To which the horse replied - Makes no difference cause i rode my bicycle to work yesterday.

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Why are you asleep? Because I'm tired.

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penis

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Why was the man angry? Because I slept with his wife.

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What did one man say to the other? I'm a Mormon.

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You know whats funny? Things that aren't listed here.

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Q: why did the girl fall off the swing?? A: because she had no arms or legs.

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Roses are der, Violets are lube, I am dyslexic.

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What's red and smells like blue paint? Red paint.

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What does a turkey do? I don't know I'm not a turkey

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If you lose your left arm, your right one will be left.

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What do you call a horse with no eyes? A horse with no eyes.

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Chuck Norris was walking down the street when he was confronted by an armed, very desperate street robber. Chuck unfortunately made the decision to defend himself, and was shot in the gut before he could complete a roundhouse kick. The robber then took his wallet and ran off, undoubtedly to buy drugs.

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hey, can you answer a question for me? yeah, sure. ThankYou!

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A mother and father heard their young son sobbing in his room, so they ran upstairs to see what the problem was. When they got to his room, they found the older son was dead and hanging from the ceiling. And the younger son was actually laughing, not crying.

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Knock Knock. who's there? It's me. you need to be specific...

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Why didn't the African kid eat lunch? He wasn't hungry.

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What's green and invisible? This cabbage.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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