How do you get a black guy out of a tree? Just call the fire department, they're trained for that kind of stuff

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how long does it take for a black woman to shit? a couple of minutes.

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How many polish people does it take to screw in a lightbulb? -One

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Q: What do you call a black person that flies planes? A: A pilot you racist

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how much blow can charlie sheen hold up his nose? enough to kill Two and A Half Men

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whats worse than having cancer? nothing you have cancer and should proceed to see doctor

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An Englishman, Irishman and a Scotsman walk into a bar. They enjoy a few quiet drinks while watching a rugby match between Italy and France on the big screen, which is why they came into this particular bar. The Englishman hopes Italy will win, the Irishman is also supporting Italy while the Scotsman is up for France. France wins the match and the Scotsman says "Good game lads eh?" The others agree.

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What happened to the blind man who went skydiving? Nothing but the dog was unlucky.The dog kept squirming and he thought he hadnt gone down the cliff yet and said "ok fine dont come with me!".The dog didnt survive. :'(

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A man walks into a bar, he is immediately rushed to the emergency room

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Why does a black man break into a car? Because he had closed the windows and locked his keys inside.

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How was copper wire invented? Probably some scientist did that

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Why did the black man fall off the bicycle? He was shot at close range by one of a gang of young white males. This horrific violence was most likely fueled by racial prejudice. Our thoughts go out to the young man's family and friends.

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An irishman walks out of a pub

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Asian: what time is it? other person: time for you to open your eyes.

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Why couldn't the Hispanic guy become a firefighter? Because the fire chief was racist.

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A sphere rolls around the corner and falls over.

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guess how...chicken pow! guess who...chicken poo! guess when...chicken pen! guess where...chicken hair! guess what...your adopted.

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A kangaroo walks into a bar, he hops up to the bartender, and asks for a martini. The bartender, not knowing exactly what to do, goes into the back to his boss's office. He says "Hey, there's a kangaroo up front askin' for a martini...do we serve kangaroos?" His boss replies "Ya, of course, but these kangaroos, they aren't too smart, so charge him like 50 bucks for the drink." The bartender agrees and goes back up front to serve the kangaroo. He pours the martini and hands it to the kangaroo, the kangaroo thanks him and says "How much do I owe you?" The bartender replies "50 bucks." The kangaroo then reaches into his pouch, pulls out a fifty dollar bill, and puts it on the counter. He finishes his drink and begins to hop away. As he is leaving, the bartender says "Hey, wait, we don't get many of your kind around here, why is that?" And the kangaroo replies "I'm not surprised at THESE prices!!!" and hops out.

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Why did the blonde kid lose the spelling bee? Because she misspelled a word.

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Knock Knock. "Who's there?" The cops.

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Q. What's silver and cries? A. Someone who's been stabbed while wearing a suit of armour.

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roses are red violets are blue some poems rhyme this one doesn't

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Whats the difference between a chicken? One of its legs are both the same.

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What did the tractor say to the cow? I'm a tractor, you're a cow, go figure.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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