Why did Nicholas Cage cross the street? To steal the Declaration of Independence.

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What do you call a redneck in a propane store? A customer.

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How's a raven like a writing desk. you really are alice.

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A monkey enters a bar and climbs up on a stool. The bartender asks, "What'll ya have, pal?" The monkey, who can niether speak nor understand English, appears slightly perplexed.

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What makes women so mystifying and beautiful? Tits.

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What's the difference between an old man and a child? The old man is older than the child

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Why did the postal worker go to work? Because he has to support his family so they do not starve like his dog.

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Have you ever seen that clown at walmart that hides from gay people?

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A child in Africa developed Malaria. He became very sick and died.

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? Because it was dead.

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Why were the babies used for target practice? Hitler demanded the Nazis to do so.

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There's an American, an African, and a Chinese walking down the street. Because the bar is down there.

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How much wood could a woodchuck chuck if a woodchuck could chuck wood? The answer is not definitive and involves several factors including the size of the woodchuck, the woodchuck's teeth, the climate in which that woodchuck lives, and the tenacity of that particular woodchuck at achieving his goal.

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A women go hit by a car, what everyone woners though, how did the car get in between the bedroom and the kitchen?

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Why did the chicken cross the road? To get to the other side. Why did the cactus cross the road? It was stuck to the chickens butt.

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What do you call a with no arms and no legs floating in the water? About to drown.

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Roses are gray violets are gray everything is gray because I'm color blind.

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Whats worse than a dead baby at the bottom of a trash can? Two dead babies. Whats worse then that 5 dead babies and worse then that? Im starting to have suspicions of you being a mass murdurer of small children.

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Why did the bear stick his head in the honey comb? He wanted honey.

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where can you find a monkey, a blond, and a bear? the zoo.

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A priest and a rabbi are playing golf one weekend. The priest tees off first. When the rabbi steps up to tee off, it begins to rain heavily. Dismayed, the rabbi says, "I thought it there was only a 10% chance of rain today."

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Why'd I have sex with your mom? I'm your father and I love your mother very much

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What's the difference between a gay white man and a gay black man? Nothing because they are both sexually attracted to men.

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Take My Wife- Because as it stands, I'm having frequent, toe-curling, unprotected sex with your wife. And that just doesnt seem fair.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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