Why don't women wear watches? In the technologically advanced age that we live in, the watch is rapidly being replaced with other electronic devices that tell time, such as cell phones or iPods.

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Q: How many black people does it take to change a lightbulb? A: One, possibly two if the lightbulb is high up and someone has to hold the ladder.

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An irishman walks out of a pub

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Why was the blonde so stupid? He had dyslexia and to make fun of his hardship would truly be a hardship of human morals.

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Q: What did Micheal Jackson Say to the boys? A: He can't speak because he's dead.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because him and his girlfriend were in a bad relationship and he needed to get away for a while.

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I am not under the alkafluence of inkahlol. The drunker I am, the longer I get.

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Michael J. Fox asked me if I wanted my drink shaken or stirred, did I really have a choice?

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How did the soccer team win? They scored the most goals.

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Q. What is worse than being British???? A. Not being British

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What has 4 legs and goes "meow." A cat. Dang! You already heard it.

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Why did the cookie go to the hospital? Leukemia

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Your momma's so fat that when she uses a hoolahoop, she gets tired after one try and has to stop.

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I once looked at a hedge that had the same colour leaves as all of the other hedges in that particular area.

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Why did the girl fall off the couch? She had a seizure.

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Drunk guy... Hey i just maybe And this is number But here's my crazy So call me met you

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Why did Harry get in the taxi? His mother told him to put his seatbelt on.

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A man walks into a bar, he is immediately rushed to the emergency room

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A priest and a rabbi are playing golf one weekend. The priest tees off first. When the rabbi steps up to tee off, it begins to rain heavily. Dismayed, the rabbi says, "I thought it there was only a 10% chance of rain today."

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How do you make a plumber cry? You kill his family.

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How do you kill a blonde woman? Stab her in the stomach so all the acidic contents of her stomach slowly burn her flesh.

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Your mom is so stupid that... She often makes mistakes.

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If you lose your left arm, your right one will be left.

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Why was 6 afraid of 7? He wasn't because he wasn't capable of having emotions after he fell into a coma and died 10 months ago after a severe car crash involving a drunk driver. The believed driver,3 had a blood alcohol of .26 and rear ended 6's car at 60 mph. 3 was uninjured and promptly arrested but....6 wasn't so lucky. The doctors said there was no chance of him coming back and they pulled the plug.He was only 9 days away from his 32nd birthday. The funeral was held shortly after, 7 seemed the most upset and couldn't hold back the tears well enough to make it through the whole service. The family is now forever scarred. In Loving Memory of 6 February 22,1982-February 13,2014 Loving father, Caring husband, Forever in our hearts

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops