Man: Docter it hurts when i touch my legs! Docter: yeah you have two shattered knee caps youll never walk again.

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A man walks into a store and asks for a loaf of bread.

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Rich people gave money to charity Charity gave money to the homeless The homeless spent the money on drugs

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Whats the difference between a jew and a boy scout boy scouts come back from camp

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How do you kill a blonde ? Shoot her in the head

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am i invited to party? no

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How do you get a black guy out of a tree? Just call the fire department, they're trained for that kind of stuff

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Your moma's so fat, she's got type 2 diabetes

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What happened to the blind man who went skydiving? Nothing but the dog was unlucky.The dog kept squirming and he thought he hadnt gone down the cliff yet and said "ok fine dont come with me!".The dog didnt survive. :'(

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What do you call it when a homosexual from spain is forced to have sex with a 400 pound black man? Rape

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Person 1: What's 2+2? Person 2: 4 Person 1: Oh, you already heard that one.

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What did the volcano say to the other volcano? Nothing, Volcanoes are inanimate objects that do not possess the ability to speak.

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What has feathers, and is known to fly? A bird

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why did Stevie Wonder run a stop sign? he was changing his CD's and missed it.

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A kangaroo walks into a bar, he hops up to the bartender, and asks for a martini. The bartender, not knowing exactly what to do, goes into the back to his boss's office. He says "Hey, there's a kangaroo up front askin' for a martini...do we serve kangaroos?" His boss replies "Ya, of course, but these kangaroos, they aren't too smart, so charge him like 50 bucks for the drink." The bartender agrees and goes back up front to serve the kangaroo. He pours the martini and hands it to the kangaroo, the kangaroo thanks him and says "How much do I owe you?" The bartender replies "50 bucks." The kangaroo then reaches into his pouch, pulls out a fifty dollar bill, and puts it on the counter. He finishes his drink and begins to hop away. As he is leaving, the bartender says "Hey, wait, we don't get many of your kind around here, why is that?" And the kangaroo replies "I'm not surprised at THESE prices!!!" and hops out.

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An alcoholic walks into a bar. He is destroying his family.

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I am not under the alkafluence of inkahlol. The drunker I am, the longer I get.

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what do you say when you see a winner weaner

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Girls go to college to get more knowledge. Boys go to Jupiter because they're already smart enough to achieve interplanetary space travel.

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What's worse than finding ten babies nailed to a tree? One baby nailed to ten trees

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Sarah Palin walks into a bar and the bartender tells her to get the f*&k out.

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What do you get when you mix a dog and a cow blood everywhere

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what does a blue watermelon and a cactus that looks like a penis have in common? orange ya glad i didn't say banana!

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how long does it take for a black woman to shit? a couple of minutes.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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