why did the chicken cross the road? i have no idea, i dont know what goes on in a chicken's brain. the better question would be why was a chicken loose in a city

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Knock Knock. Who's There? Look through your peephole, you lazy bastard.

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Roses are red Violets are blue I have 5 fingers and the middles for you

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What's purple and fuzzy? A piece of purple fuzz.

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Who enslaves small people and forces them to work in his factory all year round in ridiculous outfits. Santa

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Roses are are red Violets are blue I just ate a crockpot!

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What did the kid in the wheelchair get for Christmas? AIDS.

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What did the schoolgirl say to some of the people of Anti-Joke.com? You're sick. Stop talking about the Holocaust.

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Bill: ask me if i am three ducks in a man suit Jim: are you three ducks in a man suit? Bill: yes

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why did the clown go to the graveyard? because he was dead

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a boy poops in class everybody laughs and now he has no friends

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Whats the worst thing about dying? Your not alive anymore.

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Q: What did the farmer say when his tractor broke down? A: oh noo my tractor broke down.

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Why did the kids put pirahnas in Mr. Hermann's fish tank? So they could eat him.

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What did the banana say to the apple? Nothing, although on a deoxyribonucleic acid level, bananas are technically sharing 50% of their genes with us, humans, but yet still have the incapability to produce its own voice. In addition, apple can't talk either due to their lack of nerves, veins, arteries, and diaphragm, therefore bananas not apple cannot produce sound.

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What was funny about the Halocast? Nothing, thousands of innocent people died

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What shall we do with the drunken sailor? Call the police to have him escorted off the boat for operating a large veichle under the influence of alcohol.

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Why did the little boy let go of his balloon? Because I was raping his face.

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Where is boots, Dora asks Why the hell are you asking me when your the one who is with him.

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Why wasn't the black man served at the bar? Because they didn't serve his kind there... Did I say black guy? I meant to say a horse, wait, did I say bar? I meant the barn, yes, a horse walks into a barn but they couldn't serve him because he wasn't tamed

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how do you make a plumber sad? tell him to pull up his pants

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What's the difference between a pile of dead babies and a mountainous mound of slain human offspring? There is none, the second is conferred to the subject of a conversation using a highly advanced vernacular.

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Bill: Hey Bob guess what? Bob:What? Bill: your adopted

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What's brown and sticky? Poop.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops