A B C D E F G.... Gummy bears are chasing me 1 is red, 1 is blue 1 is tryin to steal my shoe now i'm running for my life cuase the red 1 has a knife

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How do you punish Helen Keller? Sit her in the corner and deprive her of things she likes to do.

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A man walks into a bar. Splash.

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Roses are red, violets are blue, your Mom is a fake, she adopted you!

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A Muslim walks into a bomb shop. Unfortunately for the bomb shop owner, the Muslim was a police officer. He proceeded to arrest the owner and the employees of the store, as it turned out that the selling of these particular explosive devices were illegal. They ended up in jail, and justice was served.

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Chuck Norris once jumped off of a 9 story building. He broke half of the bones in his body because he is 71 years old.

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What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? Getting stabbed.

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What's worse than a papercut? why do you insist on asking me these questions?

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Why didn't the 13 year old boy have any friends? He was autistic and didn't connect properly with people.

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Why did Visellet stop eating cherries? Because she choked on a pit and died.

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My mother always said that jumping in piles of leaves was fun. That was before she died of pancreatic cancer.

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Little Timmy enjoyed school He went to Sandy Hooks

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What did the blackman say to the whiteman???? Nothing! They both commintted suicide

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a man dyslexic into bar walks a

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How tall is a tree? Taller than the ground

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What do you call a monkey lost in a desert? A donkey who was forgotten by his owner.

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Why was the boy in a wheelchair raising money to buy a basketball uniform? Because wheelchair basketball is a popular sport

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Why was Jimmy so upset? Because both of his parents died.

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The asian boy only did an hour of study....... nothing was heard of him after his mum found out

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What do you do when you see a hot girl in your bed

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How did leatherface cut a tree when he lost his chainsaw? He just asked a friendly neighbor to borrow him a axe

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A plane crashed. The pilot was some sort of food, like a loaf of bread or a salad. Neither of which can fly a plane or do much of anything-- like get a plane to move in the first place, let alone take off.

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Q: Why did the plane crash? A: The driver was a loaf of bread

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How many People does it take to change a lightbulb? One

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops