What do you call a middle-aged Polish man on Skype? A lonely man.

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What makes my fourth grade librarian hot? The fact that I set her on fire

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What is Abraham Lincoln's favorite website? Wikipedia. It's very informative. On second thought though, the Internet had not been invented yet back in his time.

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Why did the little girl fall off the swing? Because she had no arms. Why did she fall again? Because somebody put her back on. Why wasn't she able to hug her dad? Because she has no dad.

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My little league baseball coach measured the team for cups. Its 9 years later and we still dont have those cups.

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Why was the black girl happy? She got a raise.

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Why did the chicken go to KFC? Because it was suicidal.

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I stabbed a person. No seriously, I just stabbed them. There's no punchline. Just Just Stab wounds.

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What's worse than a tree getting cut down? This joke.

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John has 5 brownies, 3 chocolate bars, and 62 cookies. What does John have now? Diabetes, John has Diabetes

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A newly wed couple is at the beach and the wife asks for sunscreen and the man says he forgot it in the car. He goes to the car only to find that the car had been broken into. He goes to call his wife and they go back to the car only to find that the car had been stolen. #Turns out the thief broke the window to steal the car but saw the owner coming and hid behind a bush and upon the man going to call his wife he continued with his mission

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What's small, furry and looks like a mouse? Most probably a mouse but given the large number of mammals with similar appearances to a mouse it could easily be a shrew, vole or even a rat if you don't know your rodents very well.

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So I want to write an Anti-Joke, so I go to the write your own tab and see in the security code box: Which one is a country- fried rice or fried chicken. C'mon, it's definitely fried rice.

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Which is worse, 9/11 or the holocaust? Biting into an apple and finding a worm.

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Why did Suzie fall off the swing? Because she was hit by a refrigerator.

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What did the whale do when he was angry? He beached himself, causing a major ecological disaster and costing the beach community thousands of dollars to return him to the water.

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What has hands but can't clap? - A Quadraplegic

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why was the boys t.v broken? because he through it out the window

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yo momma is so stupid, she probably in in the bottom 1% of her age group

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Q: Why couldn't the little girl ride a bike? A: Because she didn't have legs.

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What do you get when you pull down your pants in public? Most likely a criminal record for indecent exposure.

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What do you call it when you have sex with a black man? Sex

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What do you call a bug stepped on 47 times, then burned to a crisp? Dead

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What do you call 1 black guy and 9 other white guys? Patrick Mills

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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