How do you catch a unique animal? You get professional hunters to catch the animal.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? He grew tired of hearing the most over-used joke set up in recorded history.

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We are not even in the same country, and my eye becomes infected two times a minute or something so I wont be going anywhere. I mean, if you are some guy trying to be a girl in order to screw with me, let me first of all thank you for our exchange of ideas and concepts, and then say that if you are a guy, that likes other guys, then... Well, lets just say that if you are a man, that I don`t speak with men in general, takes away time I can spend with the ladies.

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What do you do if an elephant comes through your window? Pay For a new window

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I'd love to submit an anti joke, but unfortunatley I don't own a computer.

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how do fit 104 jews in a car? 2 in the front, 2 in the back, and 100 in the ash tray.

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Micheal Curran...that is all.

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Regarding the "I will violate you, your children and your parent if you thumb me red" comment belo. I had a green thumb, I know because I gave it to myself because I am awesome... Now I got none... I person that this this, I cannot wait to X-mas where I will be violating them all, tell them, and as thus remind you that this was their Christmas present from you... Your friendly r*pist neighborhood Moral Man: Yes, I am your neigbor... I cant wait for slot number 24 on my christmas calendar... There is a picture of you and your family... Yummy!

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Q: What did the newborn dumpster baby say to the raccoon? A: Nothing. Newborn babies cannot talk.

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What's worse than sitting through a boring class? Sitting on a bus that a terrorist is about to blow up.

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Q. Why was 6 afraid of 7? A. Because 7 was a scary dude.

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want more?

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How do you stop a man from jumping off a building? Push him off a building.

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Reading the Terms and Conditions

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A man dies on the operating table and finds himself in front of the Pearly Gates. St Peter looks at him and says " You are having a hallucination due to all the drugs they have given you and because your brain releases chemicals when you die. I am not real and there is not heaven or a god." Upon resuscitation the man contemplates his hallucination and becomes an Atheist.

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, I just shot up a plaground Now Im heading to an orphanage

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Why did Peter Piper pick a peck of pickled peppers? Peppers help strengthen his immune system.

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A dog walks into a bar Because the door was open -Tag

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What do you call a smelly black person? An African american with poor hygiene

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Opinions are like assholes. I'm not sure how they are alike, but that seems to be the general consensus.

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Hey are you sleepy? Good, cause I just saw Jeff The Killer and Slenderman outside your window. Good night!

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How do you know you're on a blind date with a black person? If they agree to eat at KFC in Compton (Wyndellberg)

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree, because it was dead. why did the second monkey fall out of the tree, becuase it was dead. why did the third monkey fall out of the tree, because he thought it was a game!

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Why is a duck? Because one leg is both the same.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops