An Englishman, a Scotsman and an Irishman walk into a bar. They have some pints then leave to do their respective tasks for the day.

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What state is high in the middle and round on both ends? Onorth Chiarolinao

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What did the surgeon say to the patient? Nothing. The patient died on the table.

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Why couldn't Jack join the football team? Jack has down syndrome

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Three cows are sitting in a field The first cow says, "MOOOO!" The second cow says, "MOOOO!" The third cow says, "MOOOO!"

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What did the boy with no arms or legs get for christmas? X box Kinect

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what do you get if you cross a retard with ruddell? andrew ruddel

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What's brown and smells like shit? My boxers.

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When life gives you AIDS! Make lemonAIDS!

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Why can't Michael J. Fox draw a perfect circle? Because no one can draw a perfect circle.

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Two cows in a field. One said, "Moo!" the other said, "Shit! i was going to say that."

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A 16 year old girl went into a bar. The police realized she did not have an ID, and arrested her.

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What do you get when you offer a blond a penny for his thoughts? Change.

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A man is eating in a restaurant and says, "Waiter! There's a fly in my soup!" The waiter says, "I'm sorry, can I bring you some salad instead?"

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what happened to the little kid on a bicycle? Nothing

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too bad about that wild ball, you otherwise played a fantastic softball game

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A black man has a woman up against a wall, and she is screaming. they are passionate lovers and he is pleasing her greatly.

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What do you call a German who roasts Jews for a living? A comedian.

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What's worse than finding a worm on your apple? Trench foot on your eyebrow.

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so a black guy, an asian, and a scott are sitting at a bar, they drink responsibly, pay their tab, and leave. The evening couldn't have been more pleasant.

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What did the White guy say to the balck guy? "How are you?"

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One day a man was really horny and wanted to bang his wife that night, so he took soom horns and banged them against her skull until his wife bled to death. He was later sentenced for homocide and to this day has been in prison

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A black man and a white women are having dinner at a fanncy resteraunt. The waitor asks "Who is the better tipper... I know and hands the check to the white women.

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A man walks into a bar. He orders a beer, then suddenly dies of a heart attack.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops