It's okay we all love you, except me, and everyone else.

Who lives in a pineapple under the sea?! No one... pineapples float.

What do you get when you cross a badger and a paper bag? The badger is cross of course but the bag is inanimate and can't be angered.

What's the difference between a dead baby and a tire iron? I've never forcibly expelled three tire irons from my vagina.

A horse walks into a bar, and the bartender says "Why the long face?" And the horse says "I have cancer".

Roses are red. Violets are blue. I don't know why.

What did the dog say to the Jewish Rabbi? Bark

I'm black and I will beat your children At checkers, they can have red

What long black and tasty? Licorice

Why did the young boy drop his bus. He was hit by an ice cream.

Why didn't the lttle boy fasten his seatbelt? It doesn't matter, it's too late now.

Why did the man drive a van? So he could keep the stuff he stole.

Roses are black Violets are black I'm blind

What do u do to blow off steam? I simply go to the top of the empire states building, poor gasoline in a bag, put a baby in it, light it on fire, and through it off the side. problem?

a boy poops in class everybody laughs and now he has no friends

What do you call a two headed platypus? Go ask him, I'm sure he has a name.

I wish there were a city named Sample. So that the sign can say "Urine Sample"

What was funny about the Halocast? Nothing, thousands of innocent people died

how do you make a plumber sad? tell him to pull up his pants

What's worse than a bee sting? A large number of things ranging from getting stung by two bees to falling off a cliff.

Q.What do you call a man with no arms, no legs, no head, and no blood in his body? A.Dead.

What's the difference between a lamp?

Think of a number, add it by 7, subtract it by 2, and multiply it by 4. Now close your eyes, isn't it dark?

What's worse than a wet sock? Being molested as a child.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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