a guy was waiting for his date, then she arrived and they went happily to the cinema

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A baby seal walks into a club. He is immediately escorted out because babies are not allowed in clubs.

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, In Soviet Russia, Poem writes you.

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A sheep croses the road It gets hit by a car.

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Have you seen the flock of birds? probably not because they hit a window and all died at impact.

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A man walks into a bar. He is a diabetic and promptly goes into a coma after drinking.

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What happened to the baby in the microwave. I don't know I was too busy masturbating off to it in my clown suit

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What do you call a penguin in the desert? Most likely a dead penguin.

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roses are red violets are puffy i am a donkey i ate some water

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How do you make a plumber cry? Kill his family.

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Why did the kid lose his mom? She was shot.

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What do you call John Lennon without glasses? A skeleton, because John Lennon is dead.

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Romney: I think you would raise our debt and make more Americans jobless. Obama: It's just cuz I'm black!

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Why did Hitler shoot himself? Because he found out Chuck Norris was a Jew.

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? It had a heart attack. Why did the baby fall out of the tree? It was stapled to the monkey

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What did the boy with no legs get? A treadmill.

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No, you would have made me unhappy and yourself miserable, until you truly value who you are, as we that still look up to you to this day, you wont see the greatness within you.

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a sausage maker buys a box of cereal

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A woman gets on a bus with her baby. The bus driver says: "That's the ugliest baby that I've ever seen." The woman goes to the rear of the bus and sits down, fuming. She says to a man next to her, "That driver just insulted me!" The man says, "You go right up there and tell him off! Go ahead, I'll hold your monkey for you."

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What wuld u do for a klondike bar? Nothing taste like shit.

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one day a boy asked a Manican if it had a pulse it didn't

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How do you get the icing in the middle of a cupcake? Cupcake raper...Duh

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My name's Forrest Gump. People call me Forrest Gump.

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Why did the black guy seem so black next to a white guy? Because he had more melanin in his skin

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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