How do you kill a blonde? The blonde you were planning on killing, Sarah, arrives home from a rather tiring run. She lets her hair down from her ponytail, and even though she is a little sweaty At the moment, you realize what a beautiful woman she really is. You decide to ask her to marry You, and after she says yes, you two make passionate love in the front seat Of your 2011 Cadillac Escalade.

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Once there was an egg by the name of Steve. His name was Steve the Egg.

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Why does Santa Clause not have any children? Because he only cums once a year.

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A red-head, a brunette and a blond are trapped on an island 10km from civilization. The red-head swims 1.5km's, but is to tired, so she swims back to the island. The brunette swims 3km's, but is too tired, so she swims back to the island. After watching the first two fail, the blond evaluates the situation and decides that she does not possess the swimming ability required to reach the 5km point (At which swimming back to the island becomes equally as far as swimming to civilization), and instead stays on the island and creates a signal fire out of bits of debris scattered on the island, getting rescued within hours.

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This Irishman walked into a pub and then drank hard liquor for the next 3 hours.

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How do you have gay sex? I don't know ask Jordan Braun

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womans rights...

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I see London. I see France. Show me your boobs.

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Your mom's house is so old, that she has rats and other various critters such as spiders, gnats, and mosquitoes.

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Whats worse than finding a worm in your apple? Living in Africa.

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How do you make a baby stop crying?you scream at it and throw it at wall

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-What's the difference between Michael Phelps and Hitler? Michael Phelps can finish a race.

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What's long, black, and the tip is shaped like a mushroom? A mushroom.

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What's more disturbing than finding an apple in your worm? The fact that you're eating a worm.

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Why did the boy tell the fly to eat the cheese? A: because he wanted him to

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What's worse than finding half a worm in an apple? Rape and child abuse.

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regoereiorgiorehgijreirehrfjirgjirejgruirehgrghehiiehaoiwpo;lkswpokewqoifgoieqjgiubtfoewfiir K.O

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Tod:Hey Rick wanna hear a joke?Rick:No.

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Why aren't there Olympics in Mexico? Idk Because everyone that can run jump or swim are already across the boarder.

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What's the difference between a Jew and a pizza? Pizzas were meant to be put in an oven.

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your mom is so fat that she had to start going to a gym to exercise and get her weight under control.

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An Asian, a redneck, an Irish, and an Iranian walk into a bar. All but the Iranian were asked to go back to the parking lot and park their car to take up only one space.

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Why do asians get good grades? Because they study very hard and want to achieve success so they can provide for their families.

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How high is the grass in Germany? Approximately the same height as the grass in America.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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