A stand-up comedian quits his job. He has social anxiety and can't stand the pressure.

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A man goes to his doctor and asks: ""What is wrong with me doc? One moment I think I am a teepee, the next moment I a, a wigwam." To which the doctor responds: "I have told you several times sir; you have stage IV pancreatic cancer."

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What do you call sad communities that have to share resources? Communists.

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ok, so a blue flower in a meadow dances valiantly, while being watched by a chipmunk. the king of the sky fairies ate an apple and a chicken and a pear, and a cumkwuat and frog legs and a bone and a library and a jeep and fig and a rhino and a sword but fairies don't have that big of mouths to eat all of that, so this never happened

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because he was at a crosswalk and the walk light was on.

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A man walks in to a bar and everyone screamed running out the door.

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Why did the stop sign run a red light? Because it couldn't see its face...

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Your mother is so fat, we needs two fat jokes to adequatly make fun of her.

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Knock Knock. Who's there? Ya. Ya Who? Dot Com.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because chickens are polemicists.

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Yo mama so old, she must take arthritus medicine to keep out of extreme pain.

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Why didn't the door open? Because it was locked

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what did the boy with cancer want for christmas? a gun

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Haunnaka in 1940's Germany. six thousand people die. in one minute.

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So this guy walks into a bar, & says "I'll have a beer"........ Yup

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Knock Knock! "Use the friggin' doorbell!"

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How do you get your dog to give you a blow job? You have to force him.

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What do you call a man with no arms and no legs, floating in the ocean? A victim of the increasingly violent Mexican drug cartels.

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Reilly and Ross went up to fetch a pale of water when a triceratops turned them into bagels then ate them and later crapped them out....

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What's the difference between a duck? One of its legs are the same.

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Me: What day is it? Rebecca Black: Tuesday

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What do you call an apple in a washing machine? My lunch!

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Did you hear about the blonde that crashed her car? No. Is she okay?

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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