Q: What do you brush your teeth with, sit on and sleep in? A: A toothbrush, a chair and a bed

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What happened when the black woman moved to the front of the bus? There were no seats available but everyone was very nice about it. She also asked for gum. Somebody did have gum. Which was nice.

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Why didn't John get a present for Christmas? Because John died eight months ago.

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What happens when a unicorn gets her period? You know it's a girl.

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What's blue, orange, and silver all over? Nothing. That's a ridiculous combination of colors.

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what did one gay guy say to the other gay guy? want to suck dicks? (cause that's what gays do)

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What did the dinosaur say to the koala? Nothing because the dinosaur is extinct and both of which cannot talk.

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What is worse than mistaking a bottle of blood for ketchup? Mistaking a bottle of "sticky white stuff" for milk... Moral: If you are a straight man that is... As for women meh... lie all you want ladies...

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How do you punish Hellen Keller Move the furniture around

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Why does Chuck Norris always know the time? He bought a fancy new watch.

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Why did the short man fall down the stairs? He got shot in the face with an assault rifle.

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why did the cookie go to the doctor? he had to get a physical to be eligible to try out for his school's football team. his mom drove him there but was very careful not to get his hopes up too high since his chances of actually making the team were slim to none based on the fact that he had no arms or legs but only succulent chocolate chips in every bite.

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How many babys does it take to paint a wall red? 7 and 24 paint brushes cause babys need do overs

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A French man, Irish man and Japanese man walk into a bar, seeing as the men speak different languages no conversation begins.

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What doesn't kill you makes you stronger....... unless it is a nonkiller disease that makes you extremely weak :D

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Roses Are Red Violets Are Blue I want to get you pregnant.

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How many inches of snow are there when the fireplace burns for 10 minutes? Red chickens

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A blonde, a Jew, and a black man all went to the store. They each bought their groceries and went home to enjoy the rest of their day with their families.

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Why'd the clown fall out of the tree? it died. Why'd the cat fall out of the tree? it died Why'd the chicken fall out of the tree? it was stapled to the clown

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Why did the chicken cross the road? To get to the other side. Why did the baby cross the road? It was stapeled to the chicken

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roses are red poo is poo

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whats older than your mom? a tortoise that has been living more than a couple hundred years

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In particle-joke physics, the antijoke is the extension of the concept of the antiparticle to the joke, where the antijoke is composed of antiparticles in the same way that the normal joke is composed of particles. Furthermore, mixing jokes and antijokes can lead to the annihilation of both, in the same way that mixing antiparticles and particles does.The result of antijoke meeting jokes is an explosion.[1]

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A guy walks into a bar, and says, "The Aristocrats!"

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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