What do you get when you cross a leopard and Chuck Norris? I don't know. Probably something like a furry yellow Chuck Norris with black spots and sharp teeth.

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How do you fit 76 babies in a bath tub... With a blender. How do you get them back out? With tortilla chips.

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You know what he said? How did you know what he said?

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Q: What's the difference between an Indian and a Trampoline. A: You take your shoes off to jump on a Trampoline.

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Your mumma's so ugly. Period.

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When is a bus not a bus? When it turns into a street

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whats big and green and if it fell out of a tree it would kill you? a snooker table

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What's the sound of one hand clapping? The same as two hands; just not as loud.

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What's worse than seeing Charlie sheen in a Turkish bath house? Watching the direct tv commercial for the 100th time today

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A Jew, a Christian and a Muslim are on a plane to France. When they arrive in Paris one will go visit a friend who recently found inspiration in the many magical streets of the city and is in the middle of a year abroad. Another will search for a job and home to support himself and any future family that he might choose to have in the future. The last will check into a hotel and proceed to have a wonderful time seeing all the sights that Paris has to offer.

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What's the best way to cross the road? Ideally with your feet and legs because disabled people usually don't recommend their unfortunate state of affairs. However there are other alternatives which may or may not be better than common or garden walking, such as crane hire - crossing in a crane bucket in a safe spot; chauffer driven limos, which don't do the straight, direct route, generally; and being carried on a replica of Cleopatra's carry couch (but with modern suspension, unless you prefer the up and down motion).

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A white guy drives to Home Depot in order to get supplies for remodeling his kitchen. He notices a few Mexicans standing around outside. He decides not to racially profile them and continues on his own business.

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What's green and has wheels? Grass I lied about the wheels

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Your mom is so fat that she turns "One Size Fits All" to "One Size Fits Most"

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Why was 6 afraid of 7? 7 was a serial-rapist with links to the Black Dragon triad. Yee.

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CJTheBEST Sticks and stones, May break my bones, Because i have osteoperosis

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Why was 6 afraid of 7? Because numbers, like people, are afraid of all things bigger than themselves

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What did Batman say to Robin before they got in the batmobile? 'Get in the batmobile Robin'

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What's worse than sitting through a boring class? Sitting on a bus that a terrorist is about to blow up.

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why was the kid laying in the middle of the baseball field? he was shot in the face then mauled by a bear.

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what do you call 4 black people pushing a car uphill? unfortunate

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life is like a rapist. sometimes they're nice other times, they ram you in the ass.

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Miley Cyrus Walked into a fence and fainted.

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Walt disney Walks Into A Bar, The Bartender says "WOAH ITS WALT DISNEY!"

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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