What did the kitty say when it's owner called him over? Nothing. It's owner killed him.

thumb_up thumb_down +2

Where do you find a dead hooker? where you left her.

thumb_up thumb_down +2

whats funnier than a dead baby? many things. a dead baby is a very sad and tragic thing.

thumb_up thumb_down +2

What bouriquet got to do open HIS FACEBOOK!

thumb_up thumb_down +2

So a man walks into a bar. Unfortunately, he had brittle bone disease, cracked open his skull and bled to death on the pavement.

thumb_up thumb_down +2

three white men are running after a black man,, the black man is winning the race

thumb_up thumb_down +2

What kind of Juice do White supremacists Hate the most? Minute Maid.

thumb_up thumb_down +2

Why couldn't Gladice get out of bed? Because she was dead!

thumb_up thumb_down +2

Little boy: Daddy, daddy, I know what i want for Christmas! Dad: Oh really? and whats that? Little boy: I want a bicycle! Dad: Why my son? You are already on a wheelchair...

thumb_up thumb_down +2

Who let the dogs out? The dog's owner.

thumb_up thumb_down +2

A man finds a lamp and rubs it and a genie pops out and says he'll grant him 3 wishes. The man says "I wish I had a trillion dollars for which I can buy whatever my heart desires" and poof he gets it. The man says "I wish I had a beautiful wife for which I can love forever till the end of time." and poof he gets it. Finally, his 3rd wish he says "I wish I have my own country for which I can rule as king and become the greatest ruler in history." and poof he gets it.

thumb_up thumb_down +2

Jack just got his new yellow bicycle. His dad got it for his 12th anniversary. Jack was ecstatic to ride it down his street for the first time. He immediately called his friends Paul and Erick and went for his first ride. The neighbors were in AWE when they saw Jack taking off on his new ride. That day the three friends had one of the best day of their young lives, they went up to the lake, had some peanut ice cream and made fun of Alexia. Jack was in love with his new bike and euphoric that they were reunited and did all their favorite things with an incredible amount of passion. Erick hated his new bike.

thumb_up thumb_down +2

Two muffins are in an oven one muffin says to the other muffin "It's hot in here" the other muffin says "Holy crap a talking muffin".

thumb_up thumb_down +2

Why did Suzy fall off the swing? As Suzy neared the ground while swinging, her foot caught a small hole in the swingset's pebble foundation, and the power of Suzy's momentum along with the sudden stop of Suzy's swing forced Suzy to fly forward off of the swing. Suzy, seeing the silliness of her mistake, laughed it off, and tried to get back up. She quickly realized that her leg had snapped in half. Suzy will never walk again.

thumb_up thumb_down +2

Why didn't the skeleton go to the dance ? "because he had nobody to go with" No because it was dead.

thumb_up thumb_down +2

Why were our jokes deleted? Because it's anti-joke.

thumb_up thumb_down +2

Why did the chicken cross the road? Turns out he was needed immediately at a business meeting.

thumb_up thumb_down +2

Dont joke about the holocaust. My grandfather died there, he fell off the guard tower.

thumb_up thumb_down +2

What's worse than aids? Being a virgin.

thumb_up thumb_down +2

What do you call a man that likes to play baseball? A Baseball Player.

thumb_up thumb_down +2

Why did the squirrel fall out of the tree? Because it was dead. Why did the second squirrel fall out of the tree? Because it was stapled to the first one. Why did the third squirrel fall out of the tree? Because it thought it was a game. Why did the tree fall over? Because it thought it was a squirrel.

thumb_up thumb_down +2

what smells like red paint, looks like red paint and is called red paint? A pear, i lied about everything i just said

thumb_up thumb_down +2

What do you call a girl with an iq of 13 Dead

thumb_up thumb_down +2

knock knock. who's there? doctor. doctor who? doctor: you have cancer.

thumb_up thumb_down +2

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops