What did one saggy boob say to the other one? Better perk up or they'll think we're nuts.

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Q:Why did the boy drop his ice cream? A: A terrorist threw a refrigerator at him then slapped the ice cream out of his hand

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? It was dead

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Have you seen the newest starwars? What movie? I mean that episode where stars fight... Will Smith vs Keanu Reeves? I am talking about the stars in the sky firing at each other! You know, those star pilots on planes... Flown by Will Smith and Keanu Reeves? BOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOM! (You heard that one in your head)

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Did you hear the one about the spoon and the dis running away while the cow jumped over the moon, IMPOSSIBLE! eating material such as the spoon and dish are inanimate objects, and cows cant jump for they weigh from 600 to 1000 lbs.

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Did I say twenty times? I meant two hundred, you already know this I gather, but your subconcious understands mathmatics and multiplications at a whole different level because its potential is indefinite.

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Roses are red, and blood is too. But violets are purple. NOT FUCKING BLUE.

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Whats worse than stubbing your toe? Getting shot.

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Why was the All-black Basketball team disqualified? Because they all died in a hotel fire.

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How many gays does it take to change a lightbulb? It's COMPLETELY circumstantial.

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There was once a little boy who started feeling sick. His mother gave him some soup. He died anyway.

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your mother is so fat, she possesses her own orbit

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why did the chicken cross the road? I never got to ask it got hit by a car.

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Why was the truck making noises? It was backing up.

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ATH: if for every 1 minute for billy is 5 minutes and every 5 minutes is an hour than billy is on acid and needs to come down.

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What do you call a woman between two houses? Her name.

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If you see a person falling down your balcony, Say cya later!

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i am an arrow and i did not hit your knee!f

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So a woman took her drivers test today Since she passed, and tomorrow is her 16th birthday, tomorrow she will have the legal privlage to get her license.

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Q: If I have 5 pencils, and you have 3 spoons, how many pancakes will stick to the ceiling? A: Purple, because aliens don't wear hats.

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Why do black people like fried chicken? Because it tastes good.

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Q: Why did the chicken cross the street? A: Because that was the direction it was headed.

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Why could the grandma chew? She couldn't she had no teeth

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your mama is so fat, she sat on the ipod touch and made the ipad.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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