Why was it raining lobsters? Because they ran out of men. Why did the basketball player miss the net? Because he was hit by a lobster

You're walking down a street and you see a man struggling to open a door, what do you do? Whatever you feel like doing.

What's worse than finding a worm in your apple ? Finding an apple in your worm !!! ... Wait, what ?

Hey, what do you call an absent-minded person? I'm sorry what did you say?

Q:Why did the Grape divorce the Prune? A:Because he was tired of Rasin kids! :D

What do you call a girl who denies that she is one? Justin Beiber

Roses are red Violets are blue I'm allergic to both Now I'm dead

What do you call a piece of celery with peanut butter on it? your moms dead

Beans, beans, are good for your heart the more you eat the less hungry you are.

How do you get a black kid to sleep? A cup of warm milk and maybe a lulluby should do it.

What's purple, smells like an eggplant, and looks like an eggplant? An eggplant.

Why did the boy fall of the swing? He had no arms or legs

Guns don't kill people, books kill trees.

What does it mean when people say your mom? it means that there name is Hunter

A dyslexic man walks into a bar. His own feelings of inadequacy over his learning disability have driven him to drink and is driving a wedge between him and his family

Why did the African boy die? He was denied any antibiotics to heal his severe case of mono and AIDS, and was living on dirty water and dirt.

Why did the girl fall of the swing? I hit her with an axe.

Two frogs go to the bar only to leave because frogs can't open up doors.

Jimmy: Daddy how are babies made? Dad: If i knew how you wouldn't be here...

Ok soo theres a Jewish Guy, a Christian Guy and a Gay Guy. The Jewish Guy goes Amen The Christian Guy goes Ámen The Gay Guy goes Ammeeeennn

What did the little boy get after falling and hitting his face on the ground? A prolonged nosebleed. And Leukemia.

Where did the cow go? To the slaughter house!!!

what do you get when you cross a jellyfish, a jar, and a brown crayon? i dont know, im not into genetics, and jars dont have genes.

Pain Olympics.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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