I've never seen your mother, so I won't make any vile suggestions concerning her weight.

A man walks into a bar. Ouch.

How do you confuse a blonde? To get to the other side

Q. have you seen Helen Keller house A. niether has she

I like my kids how i like my coffee I dont like coffee

What do you call a room with an oven and ten Jews in it? A kitchen.

Two cows are standing in a field One cow says "Mooooo"..... and the other cow says "mooooo" also because they are both cows and cannot speak

Why did the chicken cross the road? Because the marginal benefit of doing so exceeded the marginal cost.

what's difference between a pile of dead babies and a car? I don't have a car in my garage.

What did Michael Jackson say to the little boy? Nothing. He's been dead for over three years.

There were 3 children: Flower, Petal and Fridge. Flower asked, "Mum, why is my name Flower?" to which she replied "Because a flower was the first thing to fall on you when you were born." Petal asked, "Mum, why is my name Petal?" to which she replied "Because a petal was the first thing to fall on you when you were born." Fridge asked "Mum, why is my name Fridge?" to which she replied "Because you deserve to be in one."

A baby seal walks into a club.

A Jew walks into a bar...He uses his coupon to get a free drink, then leaves.

How much does a polar bear weigh? It depends on gender and environment, but a fully grown, adult, male polar bear weighs from 800 to 1600 pounds.

A baby is cold and won't drink it's milk It's dead

guess what what? nothing.

What did one terrorist say to another? You first.

Gadaffi

Whats fuzzy and greenand if it falls from a tree it will kill you? A pool table.

Womens rights

Well, you need to develop a particular mindset, and while scienTITS claim that its not logical so it does not work... Well, SUGAR, thing is that the mind and emotions, cannot be explained logically either. Let me expand your mind (if I have not already) A astronomer meets up with a brain surgeon, the Astronomer says to the brain surgeon: I do not believe in god. Why? says the brain surgeon. Because I have studied most of the outer space and never found seen any trace of God.

An artist walks into a bar and orders a rum and ckoe. The bartender reads the first sentence and realizes the artist is dyslexic and fixes him a rum and coke.

you are black i am black except for your big hairy ass

What do the world and jelly beans have in common? Nothing.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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