What is black, white, and red all over? A penguin in a blender!

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That awkward moment when your brother goes to crack his neck, but he dies instead.

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It says so on your cap.

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What do you do when you come to a fork in the road? You take it

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That dress looks amazing on you considering how fat you are.

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What's a Democrat's favorite activity? Blaming Republicans for shit they didn't do.

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Women's rights

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How do you wake up lady gaga? First you simply whisper in her ear telling her to wake up. If she doesn't, simultaneously whisper and tap her gently. If you have failed to achieve your accomplished goal, repeat step two however intensely touch her and project your voice when telling her to wake up. Step three, get a... WAIT WAIT!! I just waisted 20 seconds of your life, you're never going to meet her.

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Q: whats white and smells like shit A: my ass

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Knock, knock. Who's there. Death.

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Why did the black lady yell? She was being raped.

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What did the confused blonde girl ask to a nearby student? Nothing. She isn't supposed to chat because it's study hall and they enforce a strict "no talking" policy.

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A man walks into a bar and orders 6 shots. The bartender says "Rough day, eh?" The man says "Yes, very rough." He then goes home and hangs himself.

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Its true... Chuck Norris has no hair on his balls. Because hair doesnt grow on steel.

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I was Writing and i broke my pencil

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Why did the boy collect poop? Because it was it was his dogs shit.

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How do you wake up lady gaga? Shoot her in the head repeatedly

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Q: How mature are you on a scale of 1 to 100? A: 69. :)

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What did Batman say to Robin before they got in the car? The Batmobile only seats one, you'll have to take the bike Boy Wonder.

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Here's a riddle: What can you catch, but not throw? A really heavy ball, or STDs.

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What is worse than getting mud on your brand new t-shirt Getting stabbed.

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What do you call two Mexicans playing basketball? A waste of time because they just be playing soccer

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Whats worst then listening to you girl friends problems? Nothing.

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How do you wake up lady GaGa? You po po po poker face!

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops