What's red and has two legs? Half a cat!

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Why did the chicken cross the road? It didn't, it got hit on the way there.

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Why did the first monkey fall out of the tree? He died! Why did the second monkey fall out of the tree? He was attached to the first! Why did the third monkey fall out of the tree? He thought it was a game! Why did the fridge fall out of the tree? The branch broke! Why did Sally fall off her bike? She got hit by three monkeys and a fridge!

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Elizabeth Warren

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What's the difference between an American and a British guy? Their fingerprints.

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what did the bot get for his birthday? .. men!

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Whats green and has wheels? Grass, I lied about the wheels.

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Jesus sacrificed his life to prove that he was immortal. So where does the part where he gets nailed to a stick and beaten the shit out of fit in?

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What's the anonymous name for vampire hunters? The KKK.

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what is pink and shaped like a banana? A pink banana.

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Two men walked into a bar. The third transformed into a duck and flew away.

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Why did the boy throw the clock out of the window? Because it was broken.

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Girl 1- why was 6 afraid of 7? dog- ..................................(doesn't say anything because dogs can't ruff)

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What is funnier than 24? 25! hahahahahaha!

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What does aaron eat for dinner Answer- Fat Finger HAHAHAHAHA

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You know what sucks? A vacuum.

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Peaches eat leaches, that is why sneaches live on beaches.

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A dog, a cat, and a a fish were having a conversation while their owners were away. Ashton Kutcher is a murderer.

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Why didn't the man cross the road? He was paralyzed.

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Two muffins are baking in an oven. One turns to the other and says, "Boy, it sure is hot in here!" The other one replies, "OMG, A TALKING MUFFIN!"

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The boy said to the priest, may God be with you. The priest responded with, "And also IN you".

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What's the square root of 69? 8.306623862918075

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How many beavers does it take to paint a house blue? 0, beavers cant paint.

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Why was the boy sad? Because a freak accident killed his mum his dad his best friend and he lost both his legs and is unable to feed himself

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops