Math mean: mental, abuse, to, human

cms.......?????

When is a door not a door? When it was never actually a door in the first place and you just thought, for whatever reason, that i was.

why is walmart so big? Years ago a man named Sam Walton had a vision for one stop shopping and affordable low prices. And it goes without saying that being a one stop shop must mean you have a lot of inventory thus the size of walmart is a lot larger to hold and support the increased mass of inventory that a typical person should or could ever possibly need all in one place.

What's white and hides behind a tree? Shy milk.

Religionh

A man goes into a butcher shop and says, "I bet you 350 euro that you can't reach that bit of meat," indicating a cut of beef hanging above him. The butcher looks up and says, "No way." The man says, "Why not?" And the butcher answers, "I have a huge gambling addiction, after losing my family to it, this job is all I have left" The man leaves, ruing the silly bet he had placed.

Superman and Batman get in a fight, who wins? No one the world has just lost a superhero.

Yo mama so fat, she suffered a heart attack last week and we are all deeply concerned.

Whats red and cant fly a plane. An apple.

Why couldn't Austin eat his noodles? He was a horse, and horses don't have hands, silly goose!

Yo mama is so hairy! Then only language she speaks is Chinese

What's the difference between a pancake? They both taste good with jam

A young blonde walks into a bar and orders a shot of tequila. After about a few minutes she spots this very ugly man with one leg. The man just so happens to sit right next to her and orders a drink. The man reeks of cockroaches and he looks like a homeless man that hasn't bathed in months. They never talk and the blonde goes home.

Q: Why did the purple cantalope eat the curtains at midnight? A: Sassafrass.

What does it mean when the drummer drools out of both sides of their mouth? They may have had a stroke and you should immediately call 911.

Chuck Norris threw a grendade, killed 50 people, then it exploded This is a highly improbable event considering no man is faster then a grenade

YEAH THEY DO!

What did the duck say to the other duck? Something, But us humans don't speak there language to understand

Why did the chicken cross the road? Well, there could be several reasons. The sight of another chicken, its wondering imagination, but because chickens cannot speak, therefore, can never know the true answer.

Lad: Whats that smell Girl: Nothing Lad: That is right nothing now get into the kitchen!

What happens when a man and a woman really love each other?... - They'll most likely go on a date and enjoy themselves.

Knock, knock. Knock, knock. Knock, knock. Guess no ones home.

Knock knock Who's there doorbell Doorbell who Doorbells can't knock

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...