What did johnny say when he fell down the stairs? Nothing he snapped his neck

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what do you do when you forget to do your math homework? kill your teacher

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What is less funny than a clown? Another clown ... but with fewer limbs.

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What time is it in China right now? I have no idea, it would depend on when you are reading this. Perhaps you should look at a world clock, watch, or some other sort of time-telling device rather than humorous website. Its purpose is not to tell time. However, there are many other places for this. Good luck surfing the web, friend. I have aided you the best that I can. I only hope that you will find what you are looking for.

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who do you call those who give this joke a thumbs down? people

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Knock Knock! I have a door bell, you idiot!

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What did the grape do when it got stepped on? Released some juice and burst its skin.

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What do you get when you cross an l with a line? A t.

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There once was a man from Nantucket, His dick was so long it caused tremendous physical discomfort, and it was extremely difficult for him to find pants that did not reveal his freakish abnormality, and greatly limited his levels of intimacy. After botched reduction surgery, he was left without a penis at all and, realising the horrible irony, threw himself into a raging river (experiencing no shrinkage whatsoever).

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What's the difference between Hitler and Stalin? Nothing because pineapples aren't vegetables.

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Why do flamingos hold up one leg?f If they held up two they'd fall down.

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Why do mermaids where seashells on their breasts? They don't wear anything because mermaids don't exist.

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Ask me if I'm a rock. Are you a rock? No.

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A man walks into a bar. ouch.

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Why do Pelicans stand on one leg? Because if they stood on none, they'd fall over.

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Why is this the worst joke ever? Because it isn't even funny.

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What did the Orange say to the Apple? Hi

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how many Ethiopians can you fit in a bathtub? all of them.

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What does it take to shit in a shower?? To choke on a whambar and be 90 kgs!

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Mom: Uncle toms coming home from the war Jimmy: What are we going to do Mom: Bury his coffin he hit a land mine .............. Jimmy: ^O^

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Two Lawyers were talking to one another. The first lawyer said, "Wow this is the fourth case I've won in a row!" The other lawyer did not know how to respond because of the men the other lawyer put in jail had escaped from jail and already killed the lawyer's family.

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How do you stop a clown from laughing? Hit him in the face with an axe

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What's the difference between Wayne Gretzky and Courtney Love? They have different proffesions

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That awkward moment when you walk in on your economics teacher shagging Danii ... Anyone ?

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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