What do you call a gynochologist named John? John

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What did Susie do when the music was too loud Nothing

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how do you confuse a blonde? shes already confused Leave.Her.Alone.

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Why did Sally fall off the swing? She had no arms

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Two guys walk into A bar. The third one ducks.

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Your mother is so fat that I'm starting to worry about her health.

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What do you call a cat with a pop tart for a body and rainbows flying out of its butt? Nyan Cat

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drugs sex and alchohole are yumme as AIDS

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How do u get a clown off of a swing? You hit him with an axe.

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why did the little boy drop his ice cream cone? because he was hit by the planes that hit twin towers

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Did you know Helen Keller had a swingset? Neither did she.

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How about that airplane food? Ive never been on a plane you tell me

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What did the three best friends say to eachother? We are all best friends

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Why did the Black man cross the street? To get to the other side.

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boys

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What did the brown guy say to the black person when he got fired? Nothing, did you think this was going to be racist or something?!

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Thank you Nero, this might not sound apropiate at all, but I am in love with you and have always been, and just want you to know that what I love the most about you is your spirit, your kindness, and sincerely, how you make me feel safe, I think its that you are dead honest to the point where you insult people asking for your opinion, I never had to question what you really mean or want, you just say it out loud, I love you, I realize it must be strange hearing that from someone you see as a daughter, I remember my father too well to consider you one, but I guess I always considered you a hot big brother of sorts. You are 32 huh? You always knew did you not? Why that secret of all things? Ill be arriving as soon as those trained killers of yours show by, and man are they fast and loyal, only you could inspire that love. I know your name is Nero, but I would not mind calling you Axel or at least knight, that's what you have always been for me.

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Why did the man destroy his piano? He may have been frustrated with himself for making mistakes during practice.

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Q. What do you get when a banana and a person mate? A. The banana suffocates

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if bob has 400 pieces of chocolate and eats 200 chocolates how many does he have left. none he died from diabetes

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A Black man, a Mexican, and a Midget, get in a car. They drive to the county fair and get snow cones and have a really fun time.

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How many pancakes does it take to build a doghouse? Pancakes are not a feasible material with which to build a doghouse.

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patty was in sunday school, the teacher asked her "patty who created the universe?" john sliped into the seat next to her and jabbed her with a pen "LORD ALMIGHTY" the teacher said' good patty now who gave himself for us? john again jabbed her with a pin "JESUS CHRIST" "that very good patty now what did mary say to joseph after they had their 23 child?" john jabbed her " IF YOU STICK THAT DAMN THING IN ME ONE MORE TIME ILL BREAK IT IN HALF!!!" the teacher fainted

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Why did the chicken cross the road ? To achieve his goal on the other side of the road. Being a chicken he is not aware of the arm a fast traveling motor vehicle can bring to him.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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