A guy takes out his club and hits a baby seal with a fine for $50 for littering and threatens to smash the seal's favorite ceramic figurine with the club if he doesn't pay the fine. The man is a park ranger and takes littering very seriously.

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Why did the Mexican man grow a mustache? It wasn't his choice. Men naturally grow facial hair and he ran out of razors.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Loss of habitat.

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what do you call a black man driving a police car? a cop

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If Jewish men light a menorah during Hanukkah, what do Jewish women light? Jewish women light a menorah as well; Judaism is a relatively fair religion to both sexes.

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What's worse than finding a worm in an apple? Finding out that your girlfriend is really a drag queen and that that is why you have never had sex. -Harrison

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Why do Black people love chicken? Because it is delicious.

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Knock Knock Who's there? Nobody cause your a loser.

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A man walks into a bar and orders a beer. But it wasn't as good as he had hoped it would be.

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A: Knock Knock! B: Who's There? A: I Am...

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Birdie Birdie in the Sky, Left a message in my eye ... So I shot the little bitch

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poopy is poopy

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Q: What does a psychic have in common with a stone? A: The bible decrees that psychics are witches and should be stoned and something topical about the stone.

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Q: what do you call a drunk blond? A: a cab

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Gay Rights

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What's the difference between a murdered baby and a dead baby? Not much

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4 Jews are killed during a car accident, the whole city mourns over there death and create a plaque in their honor.

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Whats worse than biting into an apple and finding out you ate half a worm? Getting raped. Whats worse than that? Getting shot in the liver. Whats worse than that? Getting shot in the liver then getting raped.

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DING DONG! Did you have to ring the doorbell? You just ruined a good knock knock joke!

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Chuck Norris goes to the mars to fight the marshuns he then die's soon after because there is lack of oxegen on mars and theres no marshuns.

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What is worst about the great white shark? It's hundreds of sharp teeth, strong tail, or subtle racism? Probably the teeth.

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The first train go fowards at 250 mph, and the second train takes a left, how many pancakes are on my rooftop? - The answer is purple because aliens don't dribk coffee

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How do you stop your baby from crawling into your room? Shove a spear through its head.

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What's worse than finding a knife in your car? Finding a car in your knife.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops