Luck is not real. But the dismembered body in my basement is.

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Q:Who has the highest K/D ratio in Call of Duty World at War A: Hitler, 6000000/1

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I like the color potato.

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Why can't Helen Keller drive? Cars were invented after her death, so she never had the opportunity to learn.

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9/11.

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Q: whats worse than finding a worm in your apple A: the holocaust

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Scenario: 2 guys with big feet and a camels Anus are hiking on Mount Everest with a set of elephants dildos Man 1: what's the difference between a Volkswagen and a clock? Man 2: what? Man 1: you can't toboggan of a green house roof with a tub of Vaseline and a ostrich party on lady gaga's Anus

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How much wood would a woodchuck chuck if a woodchuck could chuck wood? Well that, my friend, is a good question.

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Whats so funny? Josh nash's face

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What did one cat say to the other cat? Nothing.

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What is yellow, has wheels and lies on its back? A school bus after a horrible traffic accident

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If i could rearrange the alphabet, i'd put my penis in your mouth

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What has 7 mouths 3 eyes and 5 noses Something very ugly

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I walked into a bar the other day and ordered a double. The bartender brought out a guy who looked just like me.

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Whats The Difference Between A Baby And A Watermelon ? You Can Throw One In The Air And Hit It With A Bat , And The Other Ones A Watermelon

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What's worse than finding a snake in your apple? Finding a snake in your apple

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When an anvil and a feather are dropped off a building the anvil will hit the ground first because it's heavy

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Jacob went onto anti-jokes cause Brock told him to and Jacobs his bitch.

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Why did the shark attack the rock? Because it thought it was a human.

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KENNAH CAMPIONS LAUGH

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Chuck Norris was once approached by a woman for whom he had to fight a man to obtain all while doing a mundane activity in an unorthodox manner. He promptly declined for he is married and told the man he only fights for self-defense. He proceeded to put his pants on one leg at a time like everybody else.

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Why did the kid cross the road? He was strapped to a chicken!

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Someone loses their golfball in the trees. Their playing partner replies: "what is this? This berenstein bears?"

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How many pollacks does it take to screw in a lightbuld? Likely the same number as is required when people of non-polish descent screw in lightbulds. Overall however it is variable based on the number or bulbs, position of bulbs in relation to ceiling, potential shakiness of required ladder, and desired efficiency. Please reference GE's lightbuld home instillation handbook for further information or alternately contact your local electrician or handy neighbor.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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