What do you do when a hispanic man takes your wallet? Ask him to please give the wallet back to you

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What did the ghost say to the bee? BOOBEE

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Most likely to get to a source of food or escape a predator.

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Two Pigs are in a bath. One pig says to the other "pass me the soap", to which the other pig replies "Do I look like a typewriter?"

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Why did Mary fall of the tire swing? Because she's a dumbass

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A

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Two gay guys hosted a barbecue. The music and food was great. Everyone had a good time.

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Did you hear about the one with the priest, the boy, and the dildo? Yes, sadly I have.

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What do you call a fish without gills? Dead

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Why didn't the black guy get paid for doing work hard at labor? it was the year of 1860!!

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Me, id rather be known as the antijoke rather than the antichrist, I offered him water at the desert just because I care. You killed him. Moral: Once you see the point of this joke, myself, I will be the one laughing, ten years and counting humanity, ten years or so, and the world belongs to me.

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Why did the terrorist miss the flight he was supposed to blow up? He forgot his passport.

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Roses are red Violets are blue i suck at poems nice titz

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Q:How many dead babies fit in a bathtub? A:It depends on the bathtub, but if all of them were the same size, babies also differ in size and sometimes shape. If all bathtubs and babies are the same, the number would be 1, because every baby will be as big as the bathtub.

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Why did the shark attack the rock? Because it thought it was a human.

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How do you get someone to shut up? Shove a fork down their throat and hang them by thier thumbs

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A cat walks into a bar. The bartender says "What would you like to drink?" The cat says "Meow."

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What's black and bleeding? Who cares?

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What is Freddie Mercury's favorite planet? Earth.

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Q. What's smarter then the smartest woman in the world? A. A retarded seal, or pretty much anything else.

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What do you call a mexican man working at a Taco Bell? A young man freshly out of high-school, who could not get into college because his family is sadly struck with poverty. He also has a baby on the way, due to his poor choice of not using protection when having relations with his girlfriend while he was intoxicated. I wish him the best of luck!

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How do you stop a baby from drowning? Take your foot off its head.

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What did the priest say to Jesus when he revealed himself on Christmas morning? Happy birthday

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What did my mom get for christmas? My dad, Dick in a box. My dad's name is Richard.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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