A turkey and a ham walk into a room. The ham says to the turkey "You're a turkey." The turkey in response says, "Yeah, well you're a ham!" They both then get their heads chopped off, as the room they were in was a slaughterhouse.

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Why did the black homeowner declare bankruptcy on his house? He was paying significantly more in mortgage than the actual market value of the home, since he purchased his property before the housing bubble. He carried out a cost/benefit analysis and derived the conclusion that he was effectively destroying his own wealth by continuing to pay his mortgage bills.

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What is the difference between a ginger and a pile of bricks? nothing. nothing at all.

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what did the baby say to his mum? he sed bfirbvuirnvkjwmndckie

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? Because it was dead.

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who can be more evil than the person who hit my nuts. Adolf Hitler.

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why did the chicken cross the road? I don't care! What are you doing in my house?

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Fags are gay.

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How do you kill a deer? You don't, you just let it be because that's what a decent human being would do.

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why did the clown go to the hospital? i hit him in the leg with an axe.

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What do you call a monkey? A monkey.

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Why did Dave not hug his wife? Because she looked horrifying from the Iraq war.

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A white man walked in da hood aaand he never came back

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Jews... The only funny thing they did was piss off Adolf Hitler

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Knock Knock Come in

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? Because he was dead.

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When practicing the art of origami and the berrilium dialates, how many quince pies does it take to calculate a tree? Tricycle

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Two muffins are in an oven. One muffin turned to the other and said, "Boy, its getting hot in here." The other muffin said, "WE ARE GOING TO DIE IN HERE AND NO ONE WILL HERE US SCREAM."

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A bear walks into a bar. There were 4 fatalities and 3 were taken to the hospital.

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One I grabbed a lump of coal, and crushed it with such strength, that a human being was born out of it. That man is today known as Chuck Norris. Nero.

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Why is there a black president? Cause you voted for him. Thanks! Dick.

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What happens when two Mexicans walk up to blonde and a red head sitting in car? The Mexicans attempt to smash the windshield with crowbars because they have issues with anger. The redhead turns on the car and reverses safely.

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The Piglodocus has been featured in films such as "Jurassic Pork" and "Land before Swine".

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, I am Jack Bauer, Where is the nuke?

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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