How did Chinese people get their names? They throw their pots and pans down the stairs. It says, "CHING CHANG CHONG!!!"

A guy at a baseball game....

why did the cow say "moo"? because he's a cow and that's what cows say.

What is long, hard, and full of seamen? a school bus, if you consider children to be seamen

If Chuck Norris were to roundhouse you. Then something previously happened before the altercation, that caused tension.

Why didnt the man eat the free cachew nuts? Because he did'nt want to die from an allergic reaction.

the best thing about an anti-joke is when the punch line doesn't hit you, you feel no pain

these jokes are terrible, even for anti-jokes

A man travels to the park, and kills a person, throws them in a bag and runs away. He then travels to the grocery store, kills 2 people, throws them in a bag and walks away. He then travels to the gas station, kills 3 people and walks away. He keeps traveling around killing people until he has claimed 69 victims in all. From this, we can infer that he was a psychotic murderer with a perverted sense of humor.

Two muffins are in an oven. The first muffin turns to the second muffin and says "OH MY GOD I CAN TALK!" the second muffin is so shaken in its beliefe system by a talking muffin that it commits suicide.

How do you start a Mexican parade? You roll a quarter down a hill

Why was the little boy sad? Because he had a frog stapled to his face.

Once there was a dog, another one came to it and then there were two.

Q: A Mexican and a Jew are at a race. Who get hit first? A: None of them because they're from a different religion.

Why did the girl fall off of her highchair? Her father threw an axe at her.

How did the black guy get out of prison? Further evidence in the case was found which proved that the black guy was actually donating blood to a local blood drive for children with leukemia.

A young Asian boy got a B on his test. He went home an showed his parents even though he was nervous of their reaction. They told him that a B was a good grade and put it on the fridge. After that he began to gradually flunk each class one by one because of his parent's inability to push him to be better. He is now homeless and an alcoholic.

What did the blind man say to the librarian? Hello, I am looking for books that are published in braille.

Once upon a time there was a cat named Martin. He died.

Knock knock. Who's there?

What did the blonde say to the other blonde? "Hey, do you want to get something to eat?"

TEAM Together Everyone Argues More

What did the black kid get for christmas? Probably nothing as the social economy of the black race has been low in 2011 and hasn't raised by a penny in 2012.

Worms don't like apples.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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