- Anti Joke

Why did the fireman wear red suspenders? To honor his father, Jonathan "Red" Hoffner, who was tragically killed in the line of duty. While attempting to save 3 small children in a trailer park fire, the elder firefighter suffered 3rd degree burns over 80 percent of his body. "Red" was rushed to a local hospital and lingered for several agonizing days. He began to rally but a careless error by a night nurse led to his unfortunate demise. His son was psychologically unable to wear anything but red suspenders every day for the rest of his life - not only because of his father's death but also because it was he who had maliciously set the fire in the first place.

if life throws you lemons you must be dyslexic

Q:Why does poop stink? A: it comes from butts.

A child is in the grocery checkout with their parents. It sees the candy display and asks for a pack of Reese's. When the parents do not grant the child's request, they begin to scream and cry. When they arrive home, the child is beaten with a copper rod. The new puppy that the child got for a birthday present is hanged and fed to buzzards.

Q: What's worse than seeing a scorpion A: being stung by that scorpion

Why was the jew so happy? He won the lottery which at the time was 3.40 dollars

1. A woman gets on a bus with her baby. The bus driver says: ''Ugh, that's the ugliest baby I've ever seen!'' The woman walks to the rear of the bus and sits down, fuming. She says to a man next to her: ''The driver just insulted me!'' The man says: ''You go up there and tell him off. Go on, I'll hold your monkey for you.''

Lisa’ house needed to be painted and her brother offered to do it for her. Lisa thought it was a nice gesture and told him that she wanted the house in antique white. However; after painting the house, Lisa noticed that her brother had used a color with a dark yellow tone. ”Are you sure this is Antique white?” she asked him. ”Offcourse!” he said. Afraid of hurting his feelings, Lisa didn’t dare to say anything. Ten years later, the house needed to be painted again. This time Lisa wanted to hire a professional painter, but her brother insisted on doing for her. He brought the paint, which Lisa recognized as the same yellow paint, with a color that Lisa had really begun to hate. ”Brother, are you sure this is antique white?” she asked, forcing a seriousness in her voice. ”Offcourse!” he answered, and Lisa was still too embarressed to object. Her brother didn’t have an easy life and she didn’t want to break his confidence. So the house was painted, same as before. Lisa did however notice a strange light in her brothers eyes. Another ten years passed, and the house needed to be painted a third time. This time however Lisa had had enough. Though it was her brother, she had become increasingly ashamed of her house had even stopped having guests over. With a deep breath she picked up the phone and called up her brother, ready to confront him. A woman answered; it was his wife. She could hardly speak because of her sobbing. Unfortunately Lisa’s brother had been killed in a car accident earlier that day.

How do you get a cat out of a tree? You throw a brick at it.

Roses are red, Violets are blue, This doesnt rhyme, Microwave.

why did the clown stop laughing? because it got hit by an axe

Why couldn't the old man see? Because he was stabbed in the eye.

Hi

What did one ocean say to the other? Nothing, oceans don't have hands to wave either

What is worse than stepping on Lego bare foot? Mass genocide.

what is worse then going to school farlingaye

Your mother's breasts sag with such severity that the late great surrealist artist Salvador Dali mistook them for clocks.

Why are the asians on cabin services? Because they do not speak english well enough to converse with guests.

Why was 6 afraid of 7? 7 was black.

What happened to the blonde who walked up to the vending machine? She got a snack and went on with her day.

If life gives you melons.. You're just plain retarded.

What does pooh bear call his grandma? Pooh nanny.

i like serious. serious means business. business means cash. cash means money. money makes me happy and when i'm happy you dont die

Why did the old lady start crying? Because her daughter was raped and killed.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

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