Fire extinguishers are sexy.

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Q: Why was the boy so sad? A: His parents were just killed in a car wreck, therefore orphaning him and his five brothers and sisters and leaving them with no money, food, or shelter due to lack of steady income and the fact that their house had been foreclosed on.

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:Knock Knock :Who's there? :....... No one was there because they were ding dong ditchers.

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What's the difference between a truckload of bowling balls and a truckload of dead babies? One is easier to unload with a pitchfork.

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What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? Getting a girl pregnant.

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What happened when the cow jumped over the barbed wire fence? Hopefully it made it over without lacerating its underbelly, thus causing fatal bleeding.

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What used to be red, but isn't anymore? A scalped ginger.

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God is like semen. They're both nouns.

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Q: why did suzy fall off the swing? A: she had no arms. Knock knock. Q: who's there? A: not suzy!

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What's the difference between a brick and Ricky? A brick gets laid and has a higher iq

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? It was dead. Why did the second monkey fall out of the tree? It was stapled to the first monkey.

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How many women does it take to change a lightbulb. None, Thomas Edison was a man.

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What's worse than scraping your knee? Getting raped mercilessly by Ronald McDonald.

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A duck walks into a bar. A horse walks into a bar. A cow walks into a bar. A bear walks into a bar. The owner tells them to get out, but they can't understand humans. So they just stayed there.

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Q: what do you call a camel with a garbage bag on its head? A: A ziploc baggie

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Well, there's one way...

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Roses are white Violets are black I'm colorblind That is sad

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How many bears does it take to screw in a light bulb? None; it’s a fairly menial task requiring little more than a single human hand. Requisitioning any number of bears for the effort would be an extremely dangerous “Rube Goldberg”-esque solution to simple problem.

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what did the nostalgic robot barber say to all of his customers before cutting their hair? 0010101000011100101000100100100110101010100101010101010

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What's the worst thing about gang rape? Going last.

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hey whats your name Im gonna hit you so hard........ that im gonna knock your block off

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Why did the black man drop his weed Because he got shot

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What? Why?

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Why did the college student post unfunny anti-jokes on anti-joke.com? Because he was bored shitless.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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