What's grey and doesn't climb trees? A car park.

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A man asked a friend at work if he could have $100, his friend replied "sure I'll give it to you when pigs fly", that man never received $100 dollars from his friend.

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what has wheels and is red. A heart, i lied about the wheels.

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What did the farmer say when he lost his tractor? Where's my tractor?

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Q. How many trees does it take to change a light bulb? A. Trees can't change light bulbs.

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what did the teacher say to the students when she was talking about the solar system The sun is very hot. At the core it is 15 million degrees Celsius or 27 million degrees Farenheit. Using a magnifying glass, we can see the very hot heat and the light of the sun. Please do not do that because it can hurt your eyes. This makes the light very bright and the heat is so hot it could start a fire.

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A man falls into a lake but no one is around to help him, luckily the man can swim so he got out of the lake and went home feeling embarrassed

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what is the difference of left and right? i used my right hand to stab your mother.

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If you call Dani a dog one more time, lick a gooch nut suckers. XoXo Jamie <3

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whats the difference between kids and jewish people? kids come home from summer camp

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A man walks into a bar the bartender looks at the man and says "Hey son you wanna make one hundred bucks?" the man looks at the bartender and says "Im not your son."

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What's Red, Smells like Blue Paint, What tastes like the sea, and has been doused in the essence of the 80's? If you can come up with something, don't bother; This is a trick question. The space was to give you time to think. Forget your answer.

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roses are red violets are blue i'm chinese and i don't know a joke pickle.

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What should you say when someone says a bad joke? I'm sorry, your joke cannot be completed as dialed. Please hang up and don't try again.

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Why couldn't the Egyptian pharaoh solve the Rubik's Cube? He didn't know how.

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My grandpa died in the holocaust. How? He had gas.

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Why did the woman leave the kitchen. Its was her funeral

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What is worse the the Holocaust? Nothing

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What did the black kid get for Christmas? An X-box, a sweater and some socks.

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What do you call an elephant mixed with a rhino? A freak.

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I'm going to rewrite history. History.

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Q: How do you get a black guy out of a tree? A: You cut the rope.

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what did the plane say to the trade center on 9/11 boom

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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