How many Alzheimer's patients does it take to change a light-bulb? I'm melting!

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What is a chinese person in your house? A human being

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what do you call someone that ran into a wall hurt

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women are like buddhist shrines, you don't piss on them

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What is the best way to burn Jews Light them on fire

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Did you hear about the Polish submarine? It was one of five in the Polish Navy.

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Knock knock. Who's there? Your bipolar aunt so don't ask again.

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If I were in a room with you hitler, stalin, i would shoot hitler and stalin because they are horrible people.

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What is the difference between assault and aggravated assault? Aggravated assault is aggravated, whereas assault is aggravated.

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A woman walks into a bar.

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What's worse than a baby falling? A baby fall in a pit of tar What did the baby say on the way down? "weeeeeee"

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If I could rearrange the alphabet, I'd probably put all the labials, coronals and dorsals in separate places sorted into plosives, nasals and fricatives, with the vowels at the beginning sorted by their relative IPA chartings, to make it more logical and easily attainable to foreigners.

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Your mom is so fat that her BMI is in the morbidly obese column.

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whats worse than bitting into ur apple and finding a worm? bitting into ur apple an finding out u have just murded noddy and his family who were making a nice little home in there

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What do you call a guy with a car on his head? Immediate identification would not be possible. The man would be referred to by his estimated demographics. Circumstantial evidence and dental reports may be required for identification at which points the family's would be notified. Only after this will the man's name would be released to the media who would in turn report this.

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Knock Knock Who's there? Just open the damn door.

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Why was the white man chosen for the job over the black guy? He had more work experience and was clearly the better suited applicant.

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Why cant helen keller drive Because shes a woman

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When life gives you lemons....you probably just FOUND lemons...

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Whats worse than having aids...... Being in school

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If you give a mouse a cookie, he will probably eat it then have a heart attack due to the high level of sugar in the cookie

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Roes are red Violets are blue I felt silly for writing this Because violets are violet.

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Bradley is Sexi;P just kidding!!! fatty

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Violets are Blue, Roses are Red, skip the bull$%!#, and give me head

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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