What did the three best friends say to eachother? We are all best friends

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Roses are red Violets are tits I like tits Tits

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Why couldn't the fireman get over the hill? Because he was dead.

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Roses are red, Violets are blue. I have a gun. Get in the van.

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A man walked into a bar, He then realised that he was likely to become the butt of a joke quite soon and subsequently left to take his kids to the park.

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Two muffins are sitting in an oven, they get burned because the oven was left on for to long and they end up being thrown away.

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A horse walks into a bar You have been reading so many anti jokes that you can actually anticipate the anti-joke punchline to this joke, because it is one of maybe 3 or 4.

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What is the best part about being in bed with twenty eight year olds? There are twenty of them

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Haikus are good poems, They don't always make sense though, I saw a squirrel.

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A blonde walks into a bar a uses the restroom. She needed to pee.

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There are two types of people in this world: Those who can finish lists. and

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Why can't Hellen Keller play hide and go seek? Because she is dead.

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What do you call Batman and Robin after they are run over by a steam roller? Dead

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A black man sits down to have a legal conversation with his state appointed attorney for the first time being arrested. They lawyer advises him to tell him the truth of exactly what happened. He proceeds to do so and is provided with excellent legal advice.

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Why did the wee boy drop his ice cream? He got hit by a truck.

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Why don't men have menstruation? -Because it sucks

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what do you say when you see a winner weaner

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What did one cow say to the other cow? Nothing. Cows do not possess the ability to speak.

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Bob: Your mama's so fat, she rolled over four quarters and made a dollar! Todd: YOur mama's so fat, here's a picture of her tied up in my basement. Todd wins the insult war.

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Wanna know something funny? Your face

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Q : Why was the little girl crying? A : Because she tripped and hurt her knee.

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Q: Why do geese fly in a V? A: It's more aerodynamic.

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Why did Jimmy pass out Cause he drank a full tallboy

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A man walks into a bar, little did he know it was a gay bar and a few of the regulars were drinking and got overly aggressive the unaware man was then forced into the bathroom and raped by the aggressive gay lovers

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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