Two guys walk into a bar to get out of the rain and have a drink after a long day of work. The first guy orders a bottle of imported beer sits down and begins to drink. After waiting his turn the second guy also orders a bottle of imported beer but because he is Polish he does it incorrectly and awkwardly

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How many members of Coldplay can you fit in a mini? 4, as there are 4 members of Coldplay.

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whats funnier than the boy with no arms and legs getting cancer? lebron playing basketball

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i saw your mom, i said hi

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What was the pirates grade? Arrr That isn't a valid grade

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What came first, the chicken or the egg? Neither. The single celled amoeba. As billions of years passed, the simple amoeba began to form limbs which it utilized to crawl its way out of the ocean onto dry land. Millions of years would pass before the simplified organism began to develop into a fully functional chicken.

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Why didn't the man walk done the stairs? Because he had no legs

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A man goes to the pound to adopt a dog and sees a very shaggy dog and says "WOW! Thats a shaggy dog I'll take it!" So the man takes home his new dog and decides to enter the dog in the towns anual shaggy dog contest. and wins. After winning the town shaggy dog contest he moves up to the county shaggy dog contest. theres no competition. Now the man and his dog enter into the state shaggy dog contest, the states shaggiest dogs are all competing. the man wins. Finally the man and his dog are in the prestigious national shaggy dog contest. The judge walks up to the man and says "your dog isn't very shaggy"

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Why did the boy fall of the swing? Because he had no arms!

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love is a homeless guy searchin' for treasure in the middle of the rain and finding a bag of gold coins and slowly finding out they're all filled with chocolate and even though he's heartbroken he can't complain cuz he was hungry in the first place.

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Miranda Cosgrove's singing career. ......Thats it. Thats the joke.

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What's worse than sitting in a car that's steered by a woman? Sitting in an airplane steered by a suicidal pilot.

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where did sally go after the bombing? everywhere.

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What is brown and woody? Brown wood.

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There once was a girl from Nantucket, I've heard its nice there this time of year.

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Horse tits

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Yo Momma so fat, that she need the atlantic to take a bath!

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What did the penguin wearing a blue sweater say to the sink? I am a penguin wearing a blue sweater.

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Two blondes walk into a bar. There is a fat man there, but nobody talks to him

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Person 1-How do you spell pulmonary embolism? Person 2-P-U-L-M-O-N-A-R-Y E-M-B-O-L-I-S-M. Person 1- Thanks. Person 2- Your Welcome.

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p p p penis. penis's are big and juicy

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Why did the chicken cross the road? - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - I lied, it was a goat.

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What's green, fuzzy, and if it falls out of a tree and lands on you, you'd die? A pool table.

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why did the chicken cross the road. why? because he felt like it

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops