Tod:Hey Rick wanna hear a joke?Rick:No.

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Why was the little girl crying. Her dad wiped his bloody penis with her teddybear.

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Why did Suzy drop her ice cream? Because she got hit by a bus. Knock Knock. Who's there? Not Suzy!

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You know what me and Bill Cosby have in common? Katie..

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What happened after the man with no arms and legs lost his keys? He called the police.

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What's worse than rotten eggs? Being dead.

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Why don't some black men have jobs? Because they won't work

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Who is the fastest man on earth? To get to the other side.

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Bill: My brother died on 9/11 Steve: Oh, I'm so sorry to hear that. Was he in one of the towers? Bill: Both. Steve: Both? Bill: Well, he was in the first tower when the first plane hit, so he ran over warn everybody in the second tower. While he was in the second tower, he died of AIDS. Steve: LOL! Bill: Quit your laughing, Steve, and make sweet, sweet love to me! Steve: It would be my pleasure! (While Bill and Steve made sweet, sweet love on a park bench, little did they know that a hundred miles away in a beautiful Los Angeles home, actor Jeff Goldblum was making himself a turkey sandwich with extra mayonnaise)

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Why was the guy stupid? 'Cause he was!

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What happens if you shoot a chicken? It dies.

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Hey I just met you, and this is crazy, but I'm your stalker, welcome to my deserted warehouse.

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I lost my tractor.

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Bob: "Did you eat my sandwich?" Alex: "I am your sandwich."

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Why can't helen keller drive a car? Because she is a woman

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Roses are red, Violets are blue. Who the hell named a blue flower "violet"?

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Nero, seriously, one way or the other, ill kill you, my mom blushes like every time people talk to her so fuck you, my sister if you touch her, ill.... Man, stop and ill forgive you, and I am very very sorry, now stop sending me those pics, and please do not post them anywhere, Line would not want to.

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how do you stop a speeding car? Put your foot on the brake

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Knock knock. Who's there? The landlord. You're being evicted.

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What did the archangel Michael say to Jesus? "Hello, Jesus."

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The teachers cat is a fat cat and his name is ... why do even whant to know you stalker

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Being a demigod and slaying monsters isn't normal, but on myth it is. MYTH: Not even once.

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Dumbledore: Yo mamma's so fat --- her Patronus is a cake! Voldemort: ...bitch!

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Why arnt black people alowed in bars? Because monkeys don't drink beer! DER DA DER.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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