why did the kid with no legs get eaten by wolves? he couldn't get away

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3.14159365358979323846264

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Jacob loves stroking his gf's doodle every lunch break. He was embarrased cause it was bigger than his.

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Girlfriend has 10 letters, but then again, so does freeeeedom

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So, would you like provolone or mozzarella with that? Yes.

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What do you say to a corpse? How's life?

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Chuck Norris doesn't answer the phone - he doesn't have one at the moment

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1. In 2010, 8.8 million people fell ill with Tuberculosis. 2. Up to 70,000 children died in 2010 due to Tuberculosis. 3. Tuberculosis is the leading killer of people living with HIV with 1.4 million deaths. 4. Death from Tuberculosis has dropped 40% since 1990. 5. No country has ever eliminated Tuberculosis entirely. 6. About 46 million Tuberculosis patients have been successfully treated since 1995. 7. Children under 5 years old rarely get the disease. 8. Edgar Allen Poe’s mother, foster mother, and wife all died of Tuberculosis. 9. It can take up to 12 months to recover from Tuberculosis. 10. People with tuberculosis have symptoms such as cough that “won’t go away”, a cough that brings up blood, a fever lasting longer than 2 weeks, night sweats, fatigue, or noticeable amounts of acute weight loss. 11. Nearly 2 million people die from tuberculosis yearly. 12. Tuberculosis kills 5,000 people daily.

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why was the man a redneck? because he got sunburned at the nascar race.

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Why didnt the man make it to work? Because he was in a fatal car accident.

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Why did Chuck Norris fall of the cliff? Because he was pushed.

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what do you call a bunch of black people running down a hill Exercise

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What did the flower say to the flowerpot? Nice weather we're having

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Dear Diary, I am down to my last drops of water, I'm going to die soon. Wait, a man is offering me some water! Theres still hope, wait he said sike and ran off. I'm going to die alone.

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A dog got into a gingerbread house. She ate some and brought some to the basement it got on the couch!

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Why did the dog bark? Because he wanted to.

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A blonde keeps walking down her driveway to her mailbox.Finally, her neighbor asks, "Why?" The blonde replies, "The computer says I've got mail."

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A priest was driving a motorcycle and was doing these amazing crazy stunts. It turns out they were actually filming a movie.

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what's worse then droping your phone. 9/11 having sex with the holocaust

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Knock Knock Who's There? Jehovah's Witness

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What do you call a white guy surrounded by black guys? -Steve Nash

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What did the Englishman say to the Irishman? "I am from England"

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whats worse than 4 dead monkeys? 5 dead monkeys.

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What's big, white, and can't climb a tree? A refrigerator

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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