Why couldn't the elephant ride a bike? Because he had no thumbs...

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How old is george washington? anyway thats not the point your pregnant

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Is that my bread? I sure hope so.

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Why did the black man get lynched? Because he committed eight murders and six double homicides, and the judge wanted him dead...

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Q: Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? A: Because it died. Q: Why did the dog fall out of the tree? A: Because it was tied to the monkey.

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Why couldn't the dead man take a shit? He was severely constipated

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because chickens are stupid. It most likely starved to death when it got stuck in a hole.

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Roses are red, violets are blue my neighbor is black he will jump you too

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because it did not realize it was a man-made distinction for constructed transportation vehicles and had a coincidental tendency to walk toward the area on the other side to find food or avoid birds flying over.

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What do you get when you cross a joke with a rhetorical question?

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What can you use a broken watch for? A compass.

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What's funny? At the exact moment you read this, someone is suffering from domestic abuse.

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Roses are pink. Violets are pink. The brony just took a dump. Don't give me that shit!

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See you later... Just joke I'm blind

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What did the cannibal do after he dumped his girlfriend........... Wiped his ass

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What's the difference between a blonde and a brunette? A) The color of their hair.

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once you go black you prefer not to date any white people

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Why did the groom have cold feet? Because his socks were slightly damp resulting in evaporation and the cooling of his feet, as well as the cold weather in December.

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What did batman do before getting into his batmobile? - Look for the keys.

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What did the lady say after she returned home from the grocery store? "Oh no! I forgot the milk!"

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Why was six afraid of seven? It wasn't. Numbers are not sentient and thus incapable of feeling fear.

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3 men were involved in a terrible plane crash. The first man got up, and all he could see was blue. Blue houses, blue cars, blue people. He walked into a house and asked if he could stay there, the kind people complied and let him stay there for the night. When he woke up he could still only see blue. He went down stairs and ate fruit loops, then left in his blue world. The second man got up and all he could see was red. Red houses, red cars, red people. He walked into a house and asked if he could stay there, the kind people complied and let him stay there for the night. When he woke up he could still only see red. He went down stairs and ate cherrieos, then left in his red world. The last man got up, and all he could see was yellow, yellow cars, yellow houses, and yellow poeple. Yet again he walked to a house, and the kind people let him stay the night. Once he woke up, he only could see yellow still. He went down stairs and ate fruit loops and left into his yellow world. So this proves that 2 out of 3 men prefer fruit loops over cherrieos.

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What is the difference between a bitch and your ex-girlfriend? First of all, they are two different types of mammals. Second, dogs don't talk.

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A black man is stopped at a red light. He waits for the light to turn green and proceeds forthwith.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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