Whats worse than a dead baby? A pile of dead babies. Whats worse than a pile of dead babies? A pile of dead babies with one alive at the bottom. Whats worse than a pile of dead babies with one alive at the bottom? It having to eat its way out. Whats worse than it having to eat its way out? It comes back for seconds.

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What did the wife say to her husband when he arrived home from work? Nothing. She cried over his coffin. Her husband was a marine who died in a car bombing in Iraq.

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What's the most stupid thing you have ever heard? Woman's Studies.

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69...you know how awkward this is now...

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What would you do for a Klondike Bar? I would probably spend somewhere under 3 dollars at a store, but only if somebody else drives me. I really don't want to drive, not in this gas shortage. You know what...forget it, Klondike Bars make my teeth hurt due to my sensitive teeth problem. I know I should get that sensitive teeth tooth paste, but I always forget when at the store.

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How many dead babies does it take to fill a bathtub? 17.

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Conner Schmidt's fiance has the fattest ass in the world <3

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Knock knock. Who's there? George Washington. George Washington who? George Washington Carver.

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what rhymes with pirates? not Somalia because i don't consider a inflatable boat a pirate ship.

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-Why did Sally fall off the swing? Why? -She had no arms. -Knock, knock. Who's there? -Not Sally.

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How many pupils does the teacher have? 2.

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What's big, green, fuzzy, and will kill you if it falls out of a tree? A pool table

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hi patrick

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Why did the cat land on it's back.... because its dead .......

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Why did the hedgehog cross the road? To return to its nest.

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What do an asian, a black man, and a Mexican all have in common? They all belong minorites that at one time have been outcast by society

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Q: What did the Goth-Punk girl write on her test for the question "What are three kinds of rock?" A: Igneous, Sedimentary, & Metamorphic, She is a 4.0 Geology Major attending a respectable University. She simply chooses to express herself through the musical and clothing trends that emerged in 1970's English underground music. In reality it her personal preferences in the aforementioned areas have no bearing on her intellectual or academic standing.

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Knock knock. MAN: Who's there? HOOKER: The hooker you called for. MAN: Oh, dear lord. My wife hasn't left yet. I need you to come back in fifteen minutes. WIFE: Honey, who is it? MAN: It's the hooker I called for, but you haven't left. I told her to come back in fifteen minutes.

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Why did the little girl drop her school books? A kid jacked her in the head with a brick.

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Why do women love Panera Bread? They think it's healthy.

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What did Goldilocks say to the Three Bears? No one knows. Her remains were discovered three weeks later.

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Two kids walked into a bar. One jumped over it

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What did the snowman put on his head? Nothing; snowmen are inanimate.

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whats the difference between a bench and a mexican? a bench can support its family

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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