What's the difference between Timmy and a car? Timmy can be brutally murdered.

thumb_up thumb_down +9

Friends are like potatoes. If you eat them they die.

thumb_up thumb_down +16

A man walks into a bar and orders a beer. His family is struggling financially and his children are severely malnourished. If he wasn't an alcoholic, he could afford healthcare for his family and move into a better neighborhood. But he's not, so they will die a long, painful death.

thumb_up thumb_down -15

Knock knock. MAN: Who's there? HOOKER: The hooker you called for. MAN: Oh, dear lord. My wife hasn't left yet. I need you to come back in fifteen minutes. WIFE: Honey, who is it? MAN: It's the hooker I called for, but you haven't left. I told her to come back in fifteen minutes.

thumb_up thumb_down +30

Compton

thumb_up thumb_down +8

What's worst that cancer? Murder porn

thumb_up thumb_down -14

When life gives you lemons, you are probably crazy because life cannot give you lemons.

thumb_up thumb_down -13

why did the man steal change from the tip jar? he wanted another state quarter for his collection

thumb_up thumb_down -22

Coldpaly is a good band

thumb_up thumb_down -22

Knock knock whos there? I have no anus

thumb_up thumb_down +31

yo momma is so ugly, she attempted to get plastic surgery and then died from the amount of blood loss she got when the surgeons realized her head was filled with tumors and they failed to extract them.

thumb_up thumb_down -15

Why did the man eat his wife? He was a cannibal

thumb_up thumb_down +7

Why did the man stop going to his local doctor? Because they put highly poisen liquids in the shots

thumb_up thumb_down -18

modern love

thumb_up thumb_down +7

What do you call a black guy driving a bus? A bus driver

thumb_up thumb_down +35

Kenneth kaniff takes his hat off then he meets cosmic panda with kevin the zebra because chuck norris ate a chili pepper.

thumb_up thumb_down +21

Roses are shitty Violets are bitches I'm fat.

thumb_up thumb_down +5

Why did a boy get slapped in the hand? A; because he had it in the persons face

thumb_up thumb_down -9

Why did the fireman wear red suspenders? He'd lost so much weight, due to AIDS.

thumb_up thumb_down +21

Have u seen Ray Charles' piano "no" neither did he

thumb_up thumb_down +20

Q.what semtemce is a most used lie by a fourteen year old? A. Yes i agree to the terms of service, and am above the age eighteen.

thumb_up thumb_down +1

Knock, knock Who's there? You... and you just lost the game. -Eka

thumb_up thumb_down -11

Why did the black guy die... Herpees he didn't practice safe sex

thumb_up thumb_down -21

What's red and smells like blue paint? Red paint

thumb_up thumb_down +24

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops