Where did Sally go when the bomb hit her? Everywhere

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"New season of Dr.Phil. How does that make you feel?" ANGERY!!!!!

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Why can't Michael J. Fox draw a straight line? Because he has Parkinson's disease.

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I wish you were never born. Me too. Then I wouldn't have been raped today.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Who let out the chicken?

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What do you get if Justin Bieber and Miley Cyrus have a baby? The apocalypse

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A 65 year old man is tired with his life. He begins to realize that it is meaningless to him. He wants no part in the world anymore so he decided to commit suicide. On his way to commit suicide, he comes across a magical man that has an extraordinary offer. This magical man has offered to grant the 65 year old man the power to fly. The 65 year old man, accepts the offer in great interest, but the magical man wants something in return for his deed. The 65 year old man, offers all the money in his wallet to the magical man. The magical man accepts his offer of all the money and continues. With a flick of the wrist, the magical man says, "fly, fly, high as the sky, i grant this man the ability to fly". The 65 year old man is greatly excited now that he has the ability to fly. He cant wait to try out his new power. He runs to the nearest cliff and jumps. Too bad the "magical man" was really a male prostitute that was broke and homeless. The 65 year old man died on impact and the male prostitue walked away with a wallet full of cash.

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Why did 6 hook up with 7 ?

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A man buy's a new lawn mower, it breaks so he takes it back. The shopworker says that if you don't have a recipt then you cannot replace it, the man goes home and months later catch's a flu.

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"knock knock" "whos there?" there was no response from the other side but the knocking continued, the homeowner felt distressed so phoned the police...

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Roses are red voilets are blue,you are gay so fuck you,!

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what did the man do when he went to save the other man from drowning? drowned with him...

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French man: Bonjour! English man: um, i am not french! french man: oh, My chat is on this beautiful country! Her name is Valentina! English man: What you poo in the open and name them?

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Q: How did the monkey fall out of the tree? A: It was dead Q: How did the second monkey fall out of the tree? A: It was taped on to the first one!

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What have in common a recently born baby and a quadriplegic blonde person? Both have legs but they cant walk

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Knock knock, Who's there? To get to the other side

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Why does Chuck Norris own a can named Chuck Norris? because he is self-centered due to all the attention payed to him for virtually no reason at all.

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The duck walked up to the lemonade stand and he said to the man who was running the stand, hey I cancer CC

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What did the German say when the whole of India blew up: "Wow, das muss eine gewaltige Explosion haben! Wie haben sie das geschafft?"

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What did the gym coach tell his student? Come on! You can do it! Push harder!

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Don't make my new Nazi friend upset, or he'll be Fuhrerious

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What does a squirrel get when it rains? It gets wet.

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Why did the kids stop playing tag? Because the boy was "it" was kidnapped and never seen again

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Knock knock. Who's there? Boo Boo who? I don't have a last name, it's just Boo

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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