Q:What would strawberry short cake never say? A: Very

thumb_up thumb_down -5

Roses are black, Violets are black, Everything's black, Oh damn I'm blind.

thumb_up thumb_down +10

What happened when the lawyer went surfing? A shark came up and tore his leg off.

thumb_up thumb_down -29

How many Coldplay members can you fit in a car? All of them, the standard car has four seats or more. Coldplay has 4 members so it makes perfect logical sense

thumb_up thumb_down +18

Why was 6 afraid of seven? well if 7 8 9 then what happened to the rest?

thumb_up thumb_down +6

What's white and comes out of a long black stick? Milk with a long black straw.

thumb_up thumb_down +2

What did the flower say to the flowerpot? Nice weather we're having

thumb_up thumb_down +1

What hurts like hell? HELL

thumb_up thumb_down +8

Knock knock? Who's there? Not Schrodinger's cat, or is it?

thumb_up thumb_down -6

Whats worse than getting knocked up? Finding out your Mother is a drugy living on the side of the road and your Dad is an acholic who diesnt care about you and realizes you might turn out the same way.

thumb_up thumb_down +13

whatdumb and gay stewart price

thumb_up thumb_down -12

A black man "walks into" a club. Several minutes later he is dead. The police, in a later press conference, refuse to admit that the club ever left the officer's belt.

thumb_up thumb_down -10

The boy gets shot in the face, he then dies of childhood obesity.

thumb_up thumb_down +3

Why did the boy throw the clock out the window? He was severely depressed.

thumb_up thumb_down +33

What is similar between a horse and a zebra? - If you chopped of there heads, they would die.

thumb_up thumb_down +13

A blond and his wife were in the hospital expecting their first child together. The wife gives birth to twins and the husband turns to her and says, "I can't believe we had twins. I'm so happy!"

thumb_up thumb_down +25

Well that sucks, your dad is dead.

thumb_up thumb_down -6

whats the difference between a jew and a pizza? the pizza doesn't scream when it goes in the oven.

thumb_up thumb_down +1,044

Yo momma was so ugly that everybody died.

thumb_up thumb_down +8

Why did the chicken cross the road? I don't know ask a second grader.

thumb_up thumb_down -7

Hello, this is Chuck Norris speaking.

thumb_up thumb_down -16

When life gives you Pure Filtered Water, Sweeteners (High Fructose Corn Syrup, Sugar), Lemon Juice from Concentrate, Less Than 0.5% of Each: Natural Flavors, Citric Acid (Provides Tartness), Modified Cornstarch, Glycerol Ester of Wood Rosin, Sodium Hexametaphosphate and Sodium Benzoate and Potassium Sorbate and Edta (to Protect Taste), Red 40 Make Lemonade.

thumb_up thumb_down -5

The lemons on the tree are ripe. They will be picked.

thumb_up thumb_down +47

What's worse than finding an apple in your worm? Lebron traveled

thumb_up thumb_down -7

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops