Why did the pig cross the ocean? So he could be eaten by Americans.

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Scott

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(A man goes to visit his neighbor) Knock! Knock! ...................... ................... ................ ............ he walks back home

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What's the difference between an ostridge? It can neither fly.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? To get to your house. Knock knock. Who's there? The chicken.

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Why couldn't the convicted felonist get back to America? He was in Antarctica and accidentally licked a flagpole.

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How do you keep an idiot in suspense?....

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Why did Todd have intimacy problems? He was molested as a child.

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Whats worse than finding a worm in your apple? Dyeing.

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why did the girl ask for food? because she was hungry and hadnt eaten in days.

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What did the black man say after he swallowed the bicycle? He didn't say anything. Swallowing a bicycle is physically impossible.

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Will you marry me? No, I'm cake.

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Roses are gray, Violets are gray, I'm colorblind, I hate my life

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How do you find the richest person in Mexico? You take a survey of all citizens that live in the country of Mexico, find the wealth of each individual person, and whoever has the most money is the richest person in Mexico.

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Where must you go if you have the desire to eat somebody's face? A psychiatric ward. You are clearly going insane and must seek help.

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Q: What did the Goth-Punk girl write on her test for the question "What are three kinds of rock?" A: Igneous, Sedimentary, & Metamorphic, She is a 4.0 Geology Major attending a respectable University. She simply chooses to express herself through the musical and clothing trends that emerged in 1970's English underground music. In reality it her personal preferences in the aforementioned areas have no bearing on her intellectual or academic standing.

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Wow, that was a long opinion for someone that does supposedly not watch Hentai, hey, if you like hentai thats cool, I was about your age when I got really tired of watching sex drawn or not and just you know, went for it real life as they say nowadays. I just happen to like your eyes, I mean you do not like them, but avoid mirrors and I will be the one looking at them. Chobits, yeah, I watched that a looong time ago, then deathnote, and then nothing because I got too old for that stuff, Oh wait, gungrave, that I also watched.

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Q: What's worse than a rainy day? A:

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Why was 6 afraid of 7? Because 7 was very scary.

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A worm slowly crawled through the ground, only to be eaten by an incoming bird.

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Yo mama so ugly she's ridiculed daily and has frequent suicidal thoughts.

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What do you do with a pickle jar full of semen? Use it for gel, because it took so long to collect it all, and you're frugal person who believes in recycling.

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Why did the chiken cross the road? To bite a rubarb stick.

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What is the difference between a peasant and a pheasant? One's a bird.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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