When life gives you lemons Unless it gives you sugar, water, and a cup your lemonade will suck

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Whats the difference between a pizza and a jew? A pizza does'nt scream in the oven

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why was the boy sad? because.

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"knock knock" "whos there?" "pizza delivery!"

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Why are some people so emotional? Because some their family were hit by a train and then died the next day of lung cancer.

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A man walks into a bar. Realizing he forgot his ID, he leaves.

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Why a polar bear fell over? He drank so much

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How many women does it take to replace a light bulb? Please advise. Thanks, Holly

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My brownie is so warm and squishy. You know what else is warm and squishy? Freshly killed babyies

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A man dies on the operating table and finds himself in front of the Pearly Gates. St Peter looks at him and says " You are having a hallucination due to all the drugs they have given you and because your brain releases chemicals when you die. I am not real and there is not heaven or a god." Upon resuscitation the man contemplates his hallucination and becomes an Atheist.

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Who ya gonna call? ... Whoever you need to talk to at the current time.

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Your mama's so stupid, she gave birth to YOU.

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Q: How do you eat a dead baby? A: One piece at a time.

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Why do females have boobs? So they can breast feed their babies.

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A black guy and a white guy are in a drug store. Who buys the drugs? The customers.

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"I love you, you love me" And you didn't just read that; you sang it.

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whats white and sticking?... glue, you dirty bastard

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a farmer asked me "were is my pig?" and I said ' I got hungry" :()

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What did one retarded person say to another? asiuasdhfiusanklasndfkjlnknankjas

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Why did the blond paint in the nude? because she couldn't find her clothes, and wanted to express her emotions through art

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Who job is it to protect the forest? Obiously a male and/or female forest ranger of smokey the bear. It's that simple.

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A midget walks into a bar. No one cares.

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Roses are grey Violets are grey I am a dog Woof.

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What did the little girl say to her step father? Please stop raping me

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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