"make me a sandwhich bitch" is what he said to his female boss and led to him getting fired and eventually losing his home. Two weeks later his family left him.

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Roses are red Violets are blue, Eat my anus with a spoon.

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What did the drunk homeless man get for his birthday? Liver cancer.

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If Chuck Norris were to roundhouse you. Then something previously happened before the altercation, that caused tension.

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my wife came out of the kitchen....

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Why doesn't Susie have a bike? She has no arms. Who pushed Johnny off a cliff? Definitely not Susie.

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Q: Why did the chicken cross the road? A: Because the crossing gaurd allowed him to

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Knock knock! Yes?

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WHat is funnier than a baby swimming. - A baby drowing.!

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A chickens walks into a bar... And greets her fellow friends

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Terry was always struggling with mathematics. On his last report card he received a D- in math. His parents were naturally very upset with him because they knew their son could do much better and so did Terry. Terry wanted to make his parents proud so he buckled down and started studying on a regular basis. Terry realized his had work had payed off when his 3rd grade teacher handed him his report card. Terry had revived an A in math! On his walk home from school all he could think about was how proud his mom and dad were going to be. On that walk home Terry was savagely torn apart by an escaped lion from the local zoo. His head was never found.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? It heard you like to choke the chicken.

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A man goes to the doctor complaining of pain. Everywhere I touch it hurts, he tells the doctor. "The cancer has spread," the doctor says. "Go home and spend your last days with your loved ones."

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What do you call a old guy watching little kids in a pool? a life guard

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GooglePlus.

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Nice belt.

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Osama bin Mohammed bin Awad bin Laden was born in Riyadh, Saudi Arabia, a son of Mohammed bin Awad bin Laden, a billionaire construction magnate with close ties to the Saudi royal family.

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what's worse than stubbing your toe? 9/11

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yo mamma's so fat you're fat too, because it's genetical

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Latvian guy said to the other latvian guy: ''Why did the chicken cross the road?'' The other latvian guy responded: ''In truth, i do not know. I have not seen chicken in 10 years. The last time was before the red army plundered my village. I can still hear all the screams from the women being raped. But, back to question. Where is this chicken you speak of? I have not eaten in days and my wife and children are close to starvation aswell''

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The term "shots fired" often reminds me of the time a couple of buddies had a drinking contest and I shoved a lit cigarette down the loser's throat

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ROFLMAO!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! oh wait i think i missed the joke, what?

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Why did the pilot crash the plane? It was a tomato.

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Sigh, everybody in the world hates me :( Moral: Seven billion people? Realy?

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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