What happens after you go to school? (you tell me, i'm only in 6th grade)

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Why was the gay man gay? Because he likes touching other guys penises

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How do you confuse a girl? Easily.

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Why did Fred fall off the bike? He was a shoe.

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I believe you, if something is possible, I know you can do it. I tried lucid dreaming once, but I felt like I began floating and that was no fun, scared me. I am pretty good at hypnotizing others, myself not so much.

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Do you want to hear a bad joke? A bad joke

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What has nine arms and sucks? An appendage-rich octopus with an inhaling habit.

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Whats worst than getting raped by an old man? -Nothing, getting raped is probably the worst thing to happen to you.

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"Docter, docter, I think I have cancer!" "I don't really care."

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Why did the black man cross the road? Because he lived an worked on opposite sides of the road, and so consequently needed to cross the road to work, and provide an income for his family, so they could have fresh food, clean water, and have money to pay the bills such as the mortgage so they didnt become poor and homeless, which would inevitably lead to illness and an early death for them all.

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What do you call a really old Cowboy? A senior citizen with a brain tumor.

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? Because it was shot.

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A platypus walks into a bar. Why is there a butter knife in my basement?

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What do you call a dog with no legs? It doesn't matter what you call it, he isn't coming. Posted By: Lram

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Q. Why was the black man sad? A. He had a book nailed into is leg.

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Alice, seriously do as I say, I lived with the man for over 16 years, those are not hallucinations, its PTSD, without ritalin he will just go trough that agony for nothing, not coffee not chocolate or any of that, anything that helps his focus. Seriously do not be a bitch Alice, listen to him and do as he says. Its not the first time people think he is having hallucinations when his eyes start moving back and forth like crazy, he is not seeing things, he is experiencing this as if they where real, and just because he can stay in that state for days, does not mean he is meant to go trough that kind of agony because of your ethics or caring or whatever your hesitation might be, the man can go without food for weeks if he has to, but not after you sneak trash like Zopiclone into his system. That was a mistake of yours, make up for it Alice, or ill make you pay.

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How do you call a guy that ran over 10 children A bad driver

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Roses are red, That much is true, but Violet are purple, not ****ing blue

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Holy Fish Sticks Batman! Batman and Robin were at a church and saw a priest eating fish sticks.

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Dyslexics are teople poo

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nothing drews nose is f**ing hilarious

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(402)217-6102 that is Jesse

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Why wasn't Justin Bieber allowed in the men's bathroom? It was closed for maintenance.

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Your momma's so fat she has diabetes and my have to get one of her legs amputated. It's actually quite sad.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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