I was trying to think of a joke to write, but then I became unsatisfied with my creativity and began to spiral into a depressing tangent of thoughts. I just took 37 Ambien, and have approximately ten minutes to live. Instead, I will spend my last moments writing goodbye messages to friends on Facebook and longingly looking at images of the past. Goodbye, world.

What do you call a pencil that's been broken in half? 2 pencils

Who are doctors and literally are porn stars

what is red, black, and blue all over? A horribly painted room.

What did the man say to g**guy we are both g**

Why did the plane crash? Because the pilot was a jam sandwich

What's the difference between a horse and a gorilla? Their penis size. Horses have relatively large penises, while gorillas are known to have the smallest penises proportional to their body size.

Knock Knock Who's there? Jehovah's Witness

What is Oedipus' favorite tv show! How I Met Your Mother

what did the cow say to the chicken Hey im ralston tyler

Q: What do racists call a disgusting filthy monkey that savagely jumps around in the jungle and steals white chicks? A: The same as the rest, Donkey Kong.

What's the difference between Elisabeth Fritzl and Pope John Paul II? Pope John Paul II wasn't imprisoned and raped continuously over a 24 year period in a horrific act of cruelty by his father

A white guy a black guy and a mexican are all on a trian. The white guy says "We should all through something off the train that we have too much of in this country." The mexican throws a sombraro of the train and says " We have too many of these in this country." The black guy throws a gun off the train and says "We have too many of these in this country." The white guy pushes the mexican off the train and says "We have too many of these in this country.

What is the saddest thing in a porno? He doesn't really love her.

Have you seen Hellen Keller's treehouse? No. It's quite nice, her father made it himself.

2 men were friends 1 went to hell The other went to heaven

How do you fit 100 dead babies in a box? A blender. How do you get them out? Tortilla Chips. hehehehehehe

When Chuck Norris is bitten by a zombie, Chuck Norris doesn't turn into a zombie, the zombie turns into Chuck Norris

guess what chicken butt

What do you call a man with an Eye patch and no arms? Names.

A black man walks into an abbatoir.

What's worse than getting a jigsaw puzzle for your birthday? Slavery

kieran scott has a huge back

"bluar blah blah blarRR/ the stupid pointless part" dead people/ animals/ objects can't talk/ drive/ operate compueter, lol I'm so focken funni

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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