Roses are red Violets are blue Last night I came home to find my entire family murdered....

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Can a match box? No, but a tin can.

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The Americans have just spent millions of dollars working on a pen that works in space. I would of just used a pencil.

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Where did Little Billy go after the explosion? Everywhere.

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What did Kermit the frog say at Jim Henson's funeral? Nothing.

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Loading....please wait.

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Yo mama is so stupid, she believes in god. God isn't real.

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"Hey dude, wanna come with me??" "Sure! Where????" "On your face"

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How do you make a person cross the road? Ask them nicely.

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if i get 1,000 likes ill kill your hole family

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How many dead babies does it take to paint the side of a building? I don't know, it depends on how hard you throw them.

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Daisies are green, poppies are white, I have a headache.

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A skeleton walks into a bar. It's inside a person. He orders a beer and enjoys it contentedly.

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Two muffins are baking in an oven. One muffin turns to the second and says, "Is it hot in here or is it just me?" The second muffin replies, "Holy crap a talking muffin!"

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Where does Elmo live? In Sesame Street.

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How do you stop a black person from drowning? You toss him a flotation device.

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whats brown? poop.

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why did the blond walk in to a door because she was not paying attention

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A dyslexic man walks into a bra

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A baby boy and a baby girl are much alike when you eat them they die

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What did the White guy say to the Black Guy? "Hey, what's up?"

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Who is Dank? A: Billal

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Why didn't Jesus like pizza? Because he didn't exist.

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A bear woke up from his annual hibernation to find that his stomach is growling. "I sure am hungry." the sleepy bear said. So he found some berries, but spit them out. "These berries are far too bitter." the playful bear said. He then found some honey, however was soon bombarded with a swarm of bees. "That honey is good, but not that good." the jolly bear said. He then stumbled upon a cabin. "I wonder if there is any food in here..." the curteous bear wondered. The events that followed are now reffered to by the locals as the May 20th Massacre. While no witnesses survived, the police reports depict that the Martinez family, a young family of 7 enjoying their memorial day weekend in their New Hampshire cabin, was brutally slain by a blood-thirsty animal who tracked each of them throughout the house in a period of approximately 45 minutes.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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