whats black & white the colombo school shooting citv footage

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What do you call someone that hates gay people? An asshole.

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A boy says he is going to commit suicide. To stop him, a friend tells him not to do it, he'll regret it later in life.

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What did the man do after he got in his car with out his keys? He started it up and drove Away

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Why did Michael Phelps drown? He didn't because he is the best swimmer in olympic history.

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An overweight person falls down the stairs.. They had to be taken to A&E as they suffered very serious injuries.

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Knock knock. Who's there. Alex. Alex who? Your brother Alex. Oh, please come in.

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How do u catch a polar bear u cut a hole in the ice put peas around the hole and when the bear comes to take a pea u kick it in the ice hole

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, I hate rhyming, Sandwich.

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Why couldn't the pirate get into the adult movie? He had just spent the last of his money at Ihop with his friends, and is now regretting ordering two Rooty Tooty Fresh and Fruitys when he was really only hungry for one.

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Wats a joke?

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Robin, get in the Batmobile.

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How do you kill a black man? feed him mayonase

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What is makes you more happy to see than a dead baby? A dead baby dressed up as a clown.

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A blonde, a redhead, and a brunette were driving on a highway. The redhead asked the brunette, who had the map, which was the next exit. The blonde was better with maps so she took it and announced where to go. They made the exit and enjoyed a nice lunch.

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Twelve muffins were baking in an oven. One muffin said "Where are we?" Another muffin said "Yikes! A talking muffin!"

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What do a comb and a guitar have in common? Neither of them can climb trees.

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What would people call Michael Jackson if he became president? Probably President Jackson

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whats the differences between an atari and a xbox 360 i don't know i'm not a video game nerd

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Your mom is so fat that she saw a school bus full of white children and , thought "I can hardly even remember a time when my body used to be slim." She now keeps track of her diet and exercises regularly,the result of this has been a weight loss of over 95 pounds.

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What time is it when an elephant sits on your fence? Given the unlikely circumstance in which an elephant actually does sit on your fence, it is equally unlikely said elephant would be able to do so unseen by witnesses, of whom you may ask what time the event occurred. Assuming your witness thought to look at the time befor calling animal control.

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What did the cancer patient say before they died? I am in so much pain. I love you all

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Why couldn't the 14 year old find a date? Because he had a speech impediment and girls avoided him usually.

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Q:what did batman say to robin before they got in the batmobile? A:get in the batmobile

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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