What did the Jew get for Christmas? Nothing. Jewish people celebrate Hanukkah

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What did the little girl with cancer get for Christmas? Nothing, she didn't make it that far

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Well, it was Friday night (or Halloween or St. Patty's Day) and the chicken was at a party. He got totally drunk, and then got the bright idea that it would be okay to drive home. On a rural two-lane highway, his vehicle careened into the oncoming traffic lane, and then the ditch, thus crossing the road. Fortunately, he walked away with only a few scratches. However, he was cited for wreckless driving, and got a DUI as well.

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Why Didn't The Teenager Bring His Report Card Home to His Parents? Because He Was Murdered By Thugs Walking Home From School.

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Printing billions of counterfeit dollars...in ones.

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Myth: Everyone but redheads has a soul. Fact: No one has a soul.

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Roses are red violets are blue this poem makes no sense refrigerator.

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Tia is a dumb website. Turn 0ff blah

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What is big, grey, has 8 wheels, can fly, swim and walk. I dunno. Thats why I'm asking

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Roses are red That much is true But violets are purple Not freaking blue

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Why did the chicken cross the road? He had no conscience and therefore was not able to backup the very reason that he crossed the road.

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What did the customer say to the waitier? "I think I'll have the special."

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What do you call a black man with a brain injury? Mentally Disabled

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Looks through the peephole.

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How many feminists does it take to change a lightbulb? One, although depending on how high the light in question is and where it's located she may need someone to help hold a ladder for her, if it's particularly unsteady.

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A kid goes to the doctor and says, "Doctor! it hurts when I do this!" The Doctor says, "Well, because you have been diagnosed with ALD, and to make matters worse you are allergic to rapeseed oil" The child then cries because he will never live past 40 years old

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Q:Whats the difference between a dead dog and a dead baby? A:The dog has skidmarks in front of it -RDV

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What is useless and over-payed? Our government.

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What happen when the man preposed to his girlfriend? He regretted for the rest or his life.

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Knock Knock. Whose there? Bond. Bond who? James Bond. na-na NA NA na-na na

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An Englishman, and Irishman and a Scotsman are on a plane. The plan is carrying too much weight, and is destined to crash. They drop the luggage, but there is still too much weight on board. They drop the secondary engine, but there is still too much weight. All three men then jump out. The plane crashes anyway.

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Roses are red Grass is greener I think of you when I play with my weiner

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An Irishman walks into a bar. He gets extremely drunk and gets hit by a train.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops