Past, present, and future walk into a bar. It was tense!

thumb_up thumb_down +2

Knock, Knock. Who's there? Dave. Dave who? Dave proceeds to break into tears as his grandmother's Alzheimers has progressed to the point where she can no longer remember him.

thumb_up thumb_down +13,590

What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? The Holocaust.

thumb_up thumb_down +40,460

A Japanese man, a Canadian man and a French woman walk into a bar. They do not converse because they don't speak the same language.

thumb_up thumb_down -7

Why was six afraid of seven? Because seven was a terrorist.

thumb_up thumb_down +1

An innocent man's home was raided by police, who accused him of grand theft auto. It turns out it was just a case of mistaken identity.

thumb_up thumb_down -19

How many black men can you fit into a mini? Five One in the drivers seat. One in the passenger seat. And three in the back seats. Anymore would be both dangerous and impractical due to the small interior volume of the car, and it would also put a significant strain on the cars limited engine power. Especially when tackling a steep incline.

thumb_up thumb_down -23

A duck walks up to a lemonade stand. He didn't say anything because ducks can't talk.

thumb_up thumb_down -2

Commercials lie: I think that they do believe it's not butter!

thumb_up thumb_down -20

Why did the deer die Because Jupiter is incapable of supporting life

thumb_up thumb_down +19

Why did the little boy cry regularly? Because his father was sexually abusive.

thumb_up thumb_down -23

A man walks into a butchers and asks for a loaf of bread the butcher replies " no im a butcher" The man says " its ok my bikes outside"

thumb_up thumb_down +14

How would a camel lick its own tongue It doesn't It actually gets karate chopped by Bob Sager.

thumb_up thumb_down -8

A. Did you hear about the circus fires? b. They were intense. (in tents)

thumb_up thumb_down -18

A teenager decides to stay home instead of go to college. His parents are fine with his choice since he is mentally ill.

thumb_up thumb_down +3

Why did the chicken cross the road? Because he has Obsessive Complusive Disorder.

thumb_up thumb_down -17

Why is Justin Bieber gay? Justin is attracted to the female gender

thumb_up thumb_down -9

Waiter, waiter! There is a fly in my soup. Sorry about that sir, we will replace your order and make your meal complementary.

thumb_up thumb_down +49

What's worse than chicken pox? AIDs.

thumb_up thumb_down +10

What do Vladimir Putin and a snake have in common? A central nervous system, to name but one of the many biological similarities.

thumb_up thumb_down -9

Why did the boy drop his ice cream? Because he was hit by a bus.

thumb_up thumb_down +20,157

How is butter and your mom similar? They both consist of much fat.

thumb_up thumb_down +30

How do you make a baby cry? Throw a brick at its face.

thumb_up thumb_down +22

How did the woman get pregnant? She was thrown into a pool filled with semen.

thumb_up thumb_down -9

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops