Why did sally fall of the swing? She had no arms or legs Knock knock who's there? Not sally

A talent agency is giving auditions and is just about to rap it up when a family shows up. They reluctantly agree to their "brief" audition given that they had found no suitable talent that day. The routine starts with the father starting 6 chainsaws at once while simultaneously starting a juggling/lumberjacking routine. His beautiful wife proceeds to toss him additional chainsaws (as he continually throws them for dramatic effect) while also maintaining a hypnotizing dance which seems to drain your desire to leave from your very soul. The children take turns jumping in between the chainsaws while doing a silent replay of the movie, "Crouching Tiger, Hidden Dragon." After it plays out the father tosses the final chainsaw up in the air which lands standing straight, quivering in the dust of the studio. The studio manager says, "Why that's an AMAZING act!! I'll sign you right now! What do you call your act?" In response to which, the father shits on his desk.

Q: What's full of different butts and smells bad? A: An ashtray.

rent a cops

a little kid goes as candle for halloween, 69 girls blew him teenage boy goes as candle for halloween, all he got was burned

Bob: Hey bro Jim: ... Bob: You're dead! Jim: Yep.

Why was the boy at the funeral? Because he was dead.

How did the chicken cross the road. He didn't he was ran over by a bus.

why did the man shoot himself in the foot? because he didnt have the safety on and he had no gun handling skills.

Why was the white man's girlfriend a whore? Because she engaged in sexual relations with a multitude of other men.

An Asian person drove home safely.

How old are you? 20

What's dark, has an opening, and guys like to go in it. A cave

Q. Why was six afraid of seven? A. Because seven raped a three year-old child.

roses are grey violets are grey im a dog

I can't think of a joke.

speech and debate.

This man was known to beat his wife alot, To the car door to open it for her...

Why did so many white people vote for obama? They strongly believed in what he had to say, and believed he was the right person to lead our country during its troubled times.

whats the diffrence 2 gay people and 1 gay person? A 1 person diffrence

why did the feminist cross the road? to suck a dick

It's red or yellow but most likely grey, and when its hit your eye you are dead? A train :)

Christians

What do you say to a blind man in a sunglasses store? Nothing. Why do you feel the need to bother strangers while you needlessly shop at your local merchandise outlet?

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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