What's black and white and nailed to the floor? A skunk that's nailed to the floor.

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? I hate niiggers ?

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How do you kill a 1000 Ethiopians? Throw a biscuit off a cliff. JimBoto

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Why did i get some thing to eat? Because i was hungry.

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whats the difference between a Jew and a piece of pizza? pizza doesn't scream when its in the oven.

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What is green and has wheels? Grass, i was lying about the wheels

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Person 1: Do you want to hear a joke? Person 2: Sure! Person:1: That was the joke... You missed it!!!!!

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Why is motorboating so much fun? Because they are unmatched for their speed and agility in the water.

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What do you call a puppy with no eyes? Ugly.

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Roses are red Violets are blue life is a bitch and so are you

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I was raped the other day... I still did more work than the bitch

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A man walks into a bar. He orders a drink and then he sits down to enjoy his evening.

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What did the the Priest do to the young alter boy? Blessed Him

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So there is 10 Nazis and a monkey the rest doesn't matter but i farted...

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Q: Why did the Klansman go up to acclaimed rapper and television star, Flavor Flav, and say "Do you know what time it is, boy?" A: Because his trademark "bling" seems to be an actual functioning time piece. Q2: Why did that same Klansmen brutally murder Flavor Flav after he learned it was 5:46 in the pm? A2: Becasue Flavor Flav is black and that's kinda what you're expected to do in the Klan...

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yo mamma so fat she seen a yellow train full of white people and she said stop that twinkie

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What's worse than anti-joke.com? Non-anti-joke.com! Louis

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There once was a mountain climber. He loved to climb mountains. He had climbed all of the world's tallest peaks...except Mount Everest. So, one day he decides to climb Mount Everest. He takes weeks and weeks to prepare himself. He trains and trains three times a day till he thinks he is ready to climb Mount Everest. Climbing up it takes forever. It feels like it has been days in the dreary cold. Finally, he reaches the peak. It is a glorious occasion. On the way down, a huuuuge storm rolls in. He falls down a cliff and breaks both of his legs. The pain is unbearable. He screams and screams but no one hears him. Finally after what seems like days, a group of monks find him and carry him to their monastery. Chapter Two Once the man wakes up he thanks the monks for saving his life. They give him a room, food, and nice clothes. Every night in his room, he hears a banging behind his dresser. It is really loud and he is quite annoyed by it. The next morning he asked the head monk what the noise is. The head monk says " I cannot tell you, you aren't a monk." He hears the banging noise every night. HE asks the head monk every morning but he always says he cant tell him because he isn't a monk. So the climber decides to become a monk. After years and years of training to become a monk, he finally becomes one. Chapter Three So he says to the head monk, " I am a monk, so now can you tell me?" The head monk replies, " I can't tell you, but i can help show you. So he pushes the drawer back and reveals a little door, He gives the man a lantern and says to go through it. The man goes through the door into a little, dark tunnel, eager to finally find out what the noise was. He crawls for what seems like hours and hours and hours and days and days and days and days. He finally gets to the door where the banging noise is and opens the door. What he sees amazes him. Do you want to know what the banging noise was? I cant tel you, you aren't a monk!

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Q: Why did the mugger kill the bus driver? A: Because he had a gun.

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What did the man say to g**guy we are both g**

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BOB: Hey look its spiderman Spiderman: IT'S MANSPIDER!!! Punch! Kick! Ouch!

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What did the flower say to the flowerpot? Nice weather we're having

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What's worse than the holocaust? anti-joke

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A skeleton walks into a bar and orders a beer and mop. In turns out the bartender was a paranoid schizophrenic and was hallucinating.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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