What do you get when you cross a leopard and Chuck Norris? I don't know. Probably something like a furry yellow Chuck Norris with black spots and sharp teeth.

Knock, Knock Open the fucking Door

Why did the weird alien jump everywhere? You probably don't want to know. If you learned why it jumped everywhere,you probably would make fun of it. I don't know if you know this, but aliens are sensitive. If you made fun of him, you probably would create World War 3:Humans VS Aliens.

Roses are flowers Violets are flowers

Guess what? You just lost the game.

You are the weakest link. Goodbye.

You know what's better than a taco? A better taco.

why can't Hellen Keller hear? she is deaf.

Q: How do you know if you have had too much to drink? A: When you find a bloody hole where your kidney is.

What is green and has wheels? A blue car.

Q:what's worse than eating outdated raviolis? A:terminal cancer.

Adam: knock knock!! Eve: who's there? Adam: don't be silly, just open the f*cking door!!

Q:Why did the Grape divorce the Prune? A:Because he was tired of Rasin kids! :D

What do you call 20 blondes in a freezer? dinner

Q: How do you measure a ruler A: You don't.

what do you call a mothers mothers father's brother's son's uncle's sister's brother's aunt's father's stepbrother's granddaughter's mom? I dont know... im asking you, why are you reading the answers then?

what did the white car look like... a black car but the color is different

Q: What would happen if you didn't sleep all night? A: You would probably be really tired and start seeing things and speaking strange sentences as a result.

Why did ned fall out of the tree? Because he was hit by a koala.

chuck norris multiplied by zero equals zero.

What did Jeff do to the bench? He sat on it

A man finds a woman stumbling around on the street... So he asks sarcastically "what drugs are you on?" The lady starts crying and says "I was raped"

How do you get blood from a stone? Put it in a snowball.

What is the difference between a rose and a grape? They are both purple.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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