Knock knock Who's there This is the police, open the door. I don't know anybody by that name

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What did the sign say at Disney World? Disney World.

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what did one bum way to the other? we're shit out of luck

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Why did the fat Jew cross the road? To go to the bicycle shop to fix his puncture

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Why was the black man unemployed and in debt? Because current socio-economic realities and systematic racial discrimination place him at a disadvantage in terms of education and employment. Indeed, it is statistically probable that he was raised below the poverty-line, greatly limiting his access to goods and services and his future options from birth.

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I forgot what came after: Roses are Red Violets are Blue Too much anti jokes

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whats worse than 911 nothing you cant beat 911that sucked

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Why did the chicken cross the road? The cognitive capacity of the chicken is significantly underdeveloped in comparison to humans; thus, comprehending a chicken's motives is impossible. Furthermore, interspecies communication is largely understudied - a mysterious division of science that may never be fully revealed. Therefore, one could safely theorize that no single human could breach this gap in communication differences (assuming chickens do, in fact, communicate) and in turn, could not understand the chicken's reasoning behind its choice to cross the road (excluding the possibility of psychic connections between chickens and humans [see 'Dog Whisperer' for a more clear explanation on interspecial psychic relations]) That being said, the only scientific and logical way one could understand the aforementioned question is through observation. For example, perhaps food was located on the other side of the road. However, this seems to pose a plethora of other questions: Why was the chicken near a road and not in a coop stocked with adequate food? Was this a wild chicken? Are there wild chickens? Do wild chickens often cross roads? Are wild chickens dangerous? If so, why hasn't there been warnings about dangerous, wild chickens crossing roads? The answer to these questions may never be discovered or explained.

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Whats the same about a jew and firewood? They both burn.

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Why did Suzue fall of the swing? The chain broke.

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A squirrel walks up to a tree and says "I forgot to store my nuts for winter now I am dead". Ha! It's funny because the squirrel gets dead.

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I once shot an elephant in my pajamas. I suffer from a debilitating sleep disorder.

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Q. how to kill the germ on a food. A. wash it with bleach.

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Why don't white people do the right thing? Because we suck

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Two women are sitting on a park bench, minding their own business, saying nothing.

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A cat walks into a bar. She belongs to the owner, so he gives her a saucer of milk.

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what do you call an arse bandit? lady gaga's tanning salon attendants 3rd cousins dog chauffeur, roberto

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So Joe Paterno doesn't walk into a police station....

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How do you know what time it is in the dark? Turn on the light and look at the clock.

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Do you like apples? Yes

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Roses are reb, Violets are dlue, Forgive my spelling, I'm byslexic.

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Why did the man have a finger coming out of his ear? He had a birth defect.

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roses are red violets are blue sugar is sweat and so are you

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Why did the blonde get fired from the m&m factory because she kept throwing away the w's

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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