Why couldn't Helen Keller drive? Because she was a woman.

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AROUND

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What does a fish and a truck have in common? Nothing. One is a fish & one is a truck.

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How do you confuse a blonde? £74.56.5 x 4^4^4^5 (7) : [15(68yf4+s)]

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Tom buys his wife Mary the latest Eco friendly car. The car is said to get well over 100 miles on a tank of gas. A week later, Tom is stunned to learn that while Mary was driving to the supermarket the car ran out of gas. The tank was full and Mary only drove 5 miles. How is this possible? Mary was involved in a horrible car accident. The gas tank immediately emptied and set fire to Mary and her baby.

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What's worse than a worm in your apple? Having a self-conscious baluga hold a gun on you while you hand him all the money you have on you, then realizing balugas are creatures indigenous to aquatic regions, and then realizing you are deep under water and are probably about to die from suffocation

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roses are green, violets are yellow, I am a hybridizer.

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What did one computer say to the other? 01001111 01100010 01110110 01101001 01101111 01110101 01110011 0100000 01100010 01101001 01101110 01100001 01110010 01111001 0100000 01101001 01110011 0100000 01101111 01100010 01110110 01101001 01101111 01110101 01110011

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Q Why was the boy sad A he wasnt sad he was dead and therefore had no emotional feelings

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(read this aloud): A man walks into a bar with a giraffe. Him and the giraffe order multiple shots and get hammered. The giraffe on the other hand can't hold his liquor so well, and ends up passing out on the floor of the bar. The man decides to leave him there and take off. On his way out, the bartender yells, "Hey, you can't just leave that lyin' there!" and the man says, "It's not a lion, it's a giraffe!"

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if a dinosaurs could talk, what would they say nothing their all dead

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roses are red,violets,are green who tf shit in the toilet?

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Why was 6 afraid of 7? 6 and 7 are non-living objects and cannot show fear or anger.

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What happened to the lady? She queefed.

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How did the Jewish husband and wife stay together forever? They didn't. They ended up in divorce like 50% of all other married couples due to irreconcilable differences.

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What's the difference between a Muslim and a box? A box won't blow you up!

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a retard walks into a bar a bruise appeared on his head

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Two nuns are in a bathtub, one nun turns to the other and says "where's the soap". The other nun replies "it does, doesn't it".

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I'll take a Reuben, light sauce, and could you do Provolone instead of Swiss?

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you go up your hole down your hole between your hole and you rock and roll

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Add William Wright On Facebook Answer- www.facebook.com/public/William-Wright

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Why can't Hellen Keller watch Spongebob? She doesn't have the proper cable service

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a man goes for blood check up ..........his whole hand was frozen >>>>the doctor cuts his finger'''''' he comes outside crying n sits in a chair n cries.............]]]]]] the person near him asks him why is he cryin...he says i came 4 my blood test the doctor cut my finger.the person next to him cried aloud......the person asked y r u cryin>>>>>>>>>>i came her 4 my urine test ..........????????lol

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what do you call a million black people on the moon? a good start

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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