whats long hard and full of seamen? a submarine.

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A horse walked into a bar. Several people got up and left as they spotted the potential danger in the situation.

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What's worse than an actual joke on anti-joke.com? Many things. Considering this is only one website among millions on the internet, and it really has no effect on what happens in the world, it really isn't a big deal in the grand scheme of life.

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What do you say to an over weight Jewish mother? "Work on those crunches" He was her coach.

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What's sad about 4 black people in a Cadillac going over a cliff? They were my friends.

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Peg leg Pete, yay, I know stuff too, I watched that one all the time when I was a girl.

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A dyslexic man walks into a bra.

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God made Coke God made Pepsi God made me, Oh so sexy

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Q. What's the difference between a duck? A. One of its legs is both the same

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Friends are like balloons When you stab them they die.

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What's worse than biting into your apple and finding a worm. Being raped. What's worse than being raped. Being raped twice. What's worse than being raped twice. Biting into your apple and finding a worm then throwing away that apple, retrieving another apple them biting into it and finding another worm then being raped twice. In the same 5 minutes.

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Why did Tim sit on the chair? Because potato.

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Why is it incorrect that the universe will end in 2012? Because profound idiocy doesn't always occur.

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what goes boo a sock

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Knock knock Who's there? Batman Batman who? Because he was

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Why did that guy die? because the SS thought he was a jew.

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One day there was 2 black guys in hoodys with knives in there hand. They tapped me on the shoulder and took my groceries. They then made me a jam sandwich and went on there way

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what do you call someone who cant breathe? dead

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Whats green and has wheels? Grass, I lied about the wheels.

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What can hurt you if you pee on it? A rabid grizzly bear

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if life throws you lemons you must be dyslexic

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A muslim walks into a bomb store. He is a police officer and quickly arrests the owners of the store because of the obvious legal violations.

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Patient: "Doctor, I've got a strawberry stuck up my bum." Doctor: "I've got some cream for that."

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Every 60 seconds in Africa.... A minute passes.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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