a man walks into a bar, only it was an alternate universe so there were dogs running the bar. the bartender dog called human control because it was unsanitary to have a human in a bar. the human was then escorted out by another dog and was taken to a hotel where he received no continental breakfast.

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How do you escape from being enlisted in the army of your nation? Flee to a different country and bring along your valuables.

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What's funnier than House? Family Guy.

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Everyone text/call Mrs. Butt Hemingworth for a free pint of her delicious marmalade! Serious inquirers only. 832 704 1331

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I called your friend gay and he hit me with his fist because he was angry at me for using gay in a derogatory way.

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Person 1: Your Ugly Person 2: Your mom's ugly

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why did the goat go up the ladder? because its ladder goat

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Roses are red and blue Violets are red and blue Those 3D glasses really suck.

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Q: What's worse than one dead baby at the bottom of a trash can? A: One dead baby in ten trash cans.

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dylan wishes life was like cod. that way he would actually be able to do something cool

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Man: Drink this. Man 2: Ok. (Drinks it) Man; You drank a powerful substance that is 20000 times stronger than hydrochloric acid! Man2: Oh FUCK! Kelvin Yang.

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Chuck Norris once punched a horse in the chin. Nearby people were disgusted at this act and immediately reported him for animal abuse. Today he is in prison

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Q. How many ADD kids does it take to screw in a lightbulb? A. Lets go ride bikes

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Why are black people so fast? They probably practice.

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Why did the baby cross the road? It was stapled to a bin lorry

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Agricultural production fell significantly.

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What do blondes do when they hurt themselves ? They say "Ow", just like anyone else.

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A man walks around a bar.

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Do you know what really makes me smile? Facial Muscles.

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Knock Knock Who's there? Who Who who? Hoodini

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How do you make a clown happy then sad? You give him pot then shoot him in the foot

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whats white and big and white? alot of things...

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Q: Why didn't Dwight D. Eisenhower play with the silly putty? A: Because he's dead.

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Beans, beans, the magical fruit. The more you eat, the more you have consumed.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops