Knock, Knock! Go away!

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A woman walks in a confessional booth and proceeds to tell the priest about how she killed and ate her baby in a fit of hysteria because she is having issues dealing with her fresh divorce. The priest does not call 911.

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there was a blind kid and a man wearing a WWJD & Livstrong bracelet touched his eyes and he could see. He wasn't used to the light and walked into traffic and died instantly.

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William came home from school and was very tired. He went to the kitchen and got a chocolate bar. Then he died.

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monster under your bed? thank god im in your closet...........

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why is everyone always picking on ruth? because they just do

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You know what happens when you assume. You jump to a conclusion that could conceivably have severe consequences.

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Out on the playground of a school, extremely young kids are acting as living witness to an audacious thing. They're watching a very interesting display of strength and brutality. They're observing a enactment of lofty potential and great might. What're they watching? They're regarding their principal getting promptly arrested by the federal police for possession of technically illegal weaponry including, but not only limited to what looked like to them: peculiar "fire crackers" and reloadable "candy dispensers". In the ensuing battle, their principal got shot in the arm and a random pedestrian got killed by a stray bullet. In the end, the cruel joke's on them. Guess what? They're irrepairably damaged for the rest of their life.

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Wanna hear a joke? Obamacare.

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That dress looks amazing on you considering how fat you are.

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Its not a big mistake at all, if people do not want to get hypnotized you cant hypnotize them, or so I thought...

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Why a frog can fly? It has magic. Why a snake can fly? It ate the magic frog. Why a eagle can fly? It has wings.

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why do you kill people in call of duty you don't you kill computer made figures

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What did the fish say after he

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Why did Rihanna sing "to the left, to the left"? Because people usually sing in songs

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Whats the quickest way to get famous? kill the president

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miley cyrus

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What's black and white and red all over? A penuin that got bit by a sea lion.

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When life gives you cancer, make cancerade.

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Why was little Johnny sad? His parents were killed in an awful fire

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Your mom is so fat... That you inherited type one diabetes.

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What's the difference between a Ferrari and a pile of dead babies? I don't have a pile of dead babies in my garage.

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q: why won't the asian girl do anything? a: it's pretty hard to move or speak being gagged and tied up in my basement

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, This poem's cool. I ran over your dog.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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