Why did the chicken cross the road? To escape her abusive father

LIFE :(

what's the difference between you and a yack one is a spitting idiot and the other one is a camel

What do you call a white guy surrounded by black guys? -Steve Nash

What do Japan and Haiti have in common? They are both islands.

Q: What did one tube of glue say to the other tube of glue? A:Nothing. They're tubes of glue. Inanimate objects, such as a tube of glue, however adhesive the contents of said object is, are not capable of advanced speech, let alone basic communication.

Patrick: My name is 24. Spongebob: Hey, Patrick, you know whats worse than 24? Patrick: What? Spongebob: 911.

what's worse than being hiv+? having full blown aids.

What's worse than a bee sting? Two bee stings! What's worse than two bee stings? The Holocaust What's worse than the Holocaust? Adelle....

dyslexics of the world untie!

TEAM Together Everyone Argues More

I just made up a joke! How many women does it take to screw in a light bulb? Seven. The ending needs some work...

Roses are red, Violets are blue, I am a whore, Let's have sex.

Why can't Ray Charles read? Because he's dead

look left now look right. washing machine

KNOCK KNOCK! Who's there? KNOCK KNOCK! Umm... Who's there? KNOCK KNOCK! OMG I SWEAR TO GOD WHO THE HECK IS THERE?!?!? KNOCK KNOCK! *opens door* Oh.... It was a woodpecker...

What's the difference between Michael Jackson and an astronaut? One walks on the moon and the other has sex with little boys.

Why did the girl fall off the swing? She had no arms. Why didnt she get back up? She had no friends.

Why doesn't McDonald's sell hot dogs? They don't want to advertise for McWeenies.

A Jew, a Russian, and a Turk walk into a bar. The Jew asks, "Can I get a glass of Manischewitz?" The bartender serves him. The Russian asks, "Can I get a shot of vodka?" The bartender serves him. The Turk then asks, "Can I get a Turkish coffee?" The bartender looks at him, confused, and says, "Sorry, but this is a bar. Unfortunately we don't serve coffee."

whats good about poland... fukk all

Hold on, please hold on! I will explain, it is my name, but I don't know whats so wrong with it at all... Please give me five minutes, I need to use the bathroom, please don't go just yet, don't be mad at me, what have I done wrong now? I mean if you are gonna go to sleep or something please do not be upset with me.

Roses are red, Bacon is also red. Poems are hard, Bacon.

What do you get with you crossbreed a lamp with a chicken? Nothing... You can't crossbreed an inanimate object with a living being.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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