Why did Chuck Norris start crying? Because he was in a coma

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Knock knock Who's there? To To be continued.

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Three men walk into a bar. Start drinking, fight each other and sustain massive head injuries.

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What's purple and has four wheels? A frog, except for the purple and four wheels part.

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IKR! and I hear rondo and wade were in a fight too!

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A termite walks intio a bar, looks the lovely timber bar up and down, and wonders out loud..."where's the bar tender?"

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Roses are red Violets are blue I rhyme like lil Wayne Fridge

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woman's rights

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A squirrel walks up to a tree and says, " I forgot to store nuts for winter and now I am dead." Its funny because the squirrel gets dead.

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Chuck Norris' beard takes 1st 2nd and 3rd in the most impressive beard catagory. He was the only contestant.

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Two bars walk into a guy, and the bartender says, "You're telling the joke wrong, stupid!"

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Why did the horse die? I shot it in the face.

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YO momma is so fat she suffers from cardiovascular illnesses.

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Why did the boy get hit by a bus? Because he was standing in front of the bus.

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What's funnier than 24? 25

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What can't taste with a toung, and it's soul never dies? A shoe

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How do you make Justin Bieber handsome? He already is!

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Why was the boy sad? He had a frog stapled to his face.

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A man goes to the beach to meat babes, but know one seemes to notice him. The man notices another man with a crowed of beautiful women surrounding him. Later that day he stops the man and asks him, how do you get all those girls? the man replies put a potato in your bathing suit. so the next day the man puts a potato in his bathing suit, this time he notices girls walking by and laughing, he goes to the man at the end of the day and asks why it did not work, the man replies, next time try putting the potato in the front

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I asked my wife to make me a sandwich. I had forgotten she was dead.

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rofl lol, the joke below me has made my computer offer to translate this page. It thinks it's in Spanish

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#Last Christmas I gave you my heart #And as far as I know #The transplant was a complete sucess #And you have recovered from your operation #And are now well again #This year to save me from tears #I'll donate my kidneys

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How do you stop a car from crashing into a wall? -You can't, you are welcome to try, but please don't.

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A bar walks into a man... The man begins screaming uncontrollably as the corner of the building is inserted into his anus. Brick by brick, the bar forces its way inside the man's ass, as blood begins dripping down his legs. The man knows damn well it is impossible for such a large building to be contained inside him, but he grits his teeth and forces his ass open wider. His ribs break, his lungs collapse, and his now lifeless body is stretched into the shape of the bar. The bar is almost entirely consumed before the man's skin gives way to the bulging pressure...with an explosion of blood & organs, the shredded remains of the man are slung-shot around the lot where the bar formerly stood. The bar, now soaked in a mixture of blood & organ fluid, reflects upon the failure of its experiment. For the next attempt, a man of far greater fortitude must be used, so that his body does not burst so easily. Only then will it achieve its dream of becoming the first bar to walk into a man.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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