How do you stop a black man from drowning? Through him a survival buoy

thumb_up thumb_down +6

What did the fish say when he swam into a wall? ouch.

thumb_up thumb_down +2

Roses are red Violets are blue I have a gun Get in the van

thumb_up thumb_down +2

Roses are red, Violets are blue, And really aggravate my allergies.

thumb_up thumb_down -12

ROSES ARE RED, VIOLETS ARE BLUE, I LOVE YOUR MOMA CAUSE SHE STINKS OF POO :) BY VICKY CASSIDY, RENATA SZABO, ELLA AND HEIDI MCMILLAN

thumb_up thumb_down -14

What did the boy with no arms and no legs get for christmas? A bike.

thumb_up thumb_down +3

5 blondes walk into a bar They all leave very intoxicated and die in a car accident shortly after.

thumb_up thumb_down -4

What is the worst part about being a blonde? Random green painted strangers throw forks at you claiming it will confuse you, because they got it off of an anti joke website!

thumb_up thumb_down -9

Oh my god, I'm on fire! Help me, help me, oh God it's everywhere!

thumb_up thumb_down -7

What does a person say before they die? Whatever their last word is

thumb_up thumb_down +35

A Mexican man walks into a bar, the bartender asks "haven't you got a damaged liver?" The Mexican replies "haven't you got a job to do?" The Mexican died 2 seconds later

thumb_up thumb_down -11

Q: What did the farmer say when he lost his tractor? A: "Where's my tractor?"

thumb_up thumb_down -12

Why isn't Hellen Keller a good driver? She's dead.

thumb_up thumb_down -19

Yo Momma so old, that she has arthritis.

thumb_up thumb_down -2

An anteatter walks into a bar, the bar tender says "hey renee zellweger"

thumb_up thumb_down +3

what is worse than finding a worm in your apple the earth exploding

thumb_up thumb_down +6

Giving birth to the antichrist

thumb_up thumb_down +9

BBW BABY IS THE BEST BETTER THAN THE REST WELL EXCEPT MILF BABY. SUBSCRIBE TO BigHDGuns

thumb_up thumb_down +23

a seal walks into a club.

thumb_up thumb_down -2

Q: Why did Temia go to sleep? A: Cause swaq and she was so skuxx!

thumb_up thumb_down +28

What do you call someone who has slept for 48 hours straight? Dead.

thumb_up thumb_down -21

How many light bulbs does it take to screw in a light bulb??? I don't know don't ask me when I'm asking you the question!!!

thumb_up thumb_down +1

Q: Why was 2 afraid of 3? A: Cause 3 4 5!

thumb_up thumb_down +16

What's the difference between tiger woods and Santa clause? Tiger woods is a thug

thumb_up thumb_down -6

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops