Roses are red, Violets are blue. False. Violets are violet

A man walks into a bar and sees a depressed looking giraffe. The man says, “Why the long neck?” The giraffe responds, “That’s not the expression.”

Justin Bieber

Two tomatoes where crossing the road, when one of them barely avoided being run over. The other said, come on tomato!

What do you call a fat man in a tiny pipe? Stuck.

What did a pornstar say when she heard hard banging from the front door? Come inside.

Why are Asians bad drivers? There Not. Have you ever seen Tokyo Drift?

Mike and Richard were walking down the street together Richard left because of Mike's garlic breath

How many filthy niggers does it take to screw in a light bulb? None, because I killed off all the filthy niggers.

Knock knock, Knock knock jokes aren't funny.

Whats worse then hell? The guy who commited suicide would know.

What's worse the a bee sting? Two bees stings What's worse the two bee stings? The Holocaust What's worse the. The Holocaust? Three bee stings

What's one plus one? 2. Two legit, two legit to quit, hey, hey... What's one plus two? 3. Easy as abc, 123, abc, baby you and me. What's one plus three? 4. hes a jolly good fellow, for he's a jolly good fellow.

How did the fat man survive the plane crash? He didn't, he died like everyone else!

why did annie fall of the swing? she had no arms.. knock knock who's there? not annie.

Doctor: I bring grave news. Your wife is dying. She won't survive for another 100 years. Concerned and anguished Husband: Oh... that's ok! Doctor: Oh did I say years? I meant days! Oh the mirth! *The doctor breaks down into hysterical laughter, which the Concerned and Anguished Husband is furious to see, as the Doctor is taking delight out of such a grave situation.

"I have been threw the desert with a horse with no no name" wrong the horse, name was no name

Whats funnier than throwing a baby off the top of a building? The sound it makes when it hits the ground.

Knock knock. Who's there? Meals on wheels - eat up!

What did the white man say to the black man? Nice Pants

So a guy walks into the doctors and say "Doctor it hurts when i poke my knee like this" the doctor says "Let me see your hand" the doctor squeezes the patients finger and the patient says "ow!" the doctor says "now poke you knee again" the patient pokes his knee and says "it still hurts" so the doctor comes to a conclusion and says " you dont have a broken kneecap you have a broken finger, stupid, now get out and leave me alone!"

please thumbs this up to help rhinos with boners thank you

What did the one Brick say to the other Brick? We have the same name.

Two fish in a tank one said "How do you drive this thing?"

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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