What's a pirate's favorite video game? Pirates lived in a time before such technology existed

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Knock Knock. Who's there? Doctor. Doctor Who? Doctor Watson - I'm here to see your little sister who is currently terminally ill and every second is of vital importance. Therefore this exchange of words is only worsening the already terrible situation that we find ourselves in. Please open the door.

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Roses are red, Violets are red, Trees are red, Bushes are red, Oh shit, my garden is on fire

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What do the duck and elephant have in common?? Nothing, they are completely different species.

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roses are red, violets are violet

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Slam! Slam! Slam! I'm a woodpecker. Slam! Slam! Slam! Except with dirt.

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what do a jew homosexual and a latino all have in common? human dignity.

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Why can't a dinosaur clap its hands? Dinosaurs are extinct.

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How do you confuse a terrorist? Speak another language other than Arabic

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What do you call a black guy selling drugs? a pharmacist

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Why did Suzy fall off the swing? Because she had no arms. Knock, knock. Who's there? Not Suzy.

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Roses are red, violets are blue, i get tired of this shit let's have some grey goose

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So a guy with alsimers walks into a bar........I forget the rest.

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A- Knock Knock B- Who's there? A- Soccer!

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Ten years ago we had Steve Jobs, Bob Hope and Johnny Cash ... now we have no Jobs, no Hope and no Cash.

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man 1.have u sen my girl friend man 2. yes man 1. rely man 2. no man 1. dick

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Knock knock Who's there? The chicken that crossed the road

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What has a skinny head and specky? Josh Moran.

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Why can't Michael Jackson play chess? He's dead.

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A shoemaker walks into a bar holding a shoebox with only one shoe inside. The bartender gives him a drink and asks "Say mister, why are you carrying that shoebox with one shoe?" The shoemaker says "Well sir, it's a long story." The bartender says "Okay, give me the short version." The shoemaker says "Okay, long story short, I'm not really a shoemaker." The bartender asks "Well buddy, what are ya?" The shoemaker gets up from his chair and says "I'm a guy missing shoe."

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Roses are red Violets are blue You just lost the game UMAD Bro?

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Why can't you lie to atoms? Because they make up everything!

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why did the cow go to the theater? to see the new movies pick one and have a good time.

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A horse walks into a bar, and the bartender says,"Why the long face?" The horse replies,"I have terminal cancer."

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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