Obama says: I can throw one 1,000 dollar bill out the window and make one person really happy Michelle says: I can throw ten 100 dollar bills out the window and make ten people really happy The Co-Pilot says: I can throw you both out the window and make 250,000,000 people really happy tee-hee

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your skull would make a nice pen holder

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What's sad about 4 black people in a Cadillac going over a cliff? They were my friends.

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How do you make a plumber cry? You kill his family

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What happened when the man lost his sandwich? He couldnt eat.

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Jews

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What do you get when you cross a lamb and a pigeon? You get your house taken away.

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What do you call a person with an arrow in their head? Dead

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How do you trick the devil? You give him a ginger.

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Do you know what's hilarious? Not rape.

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Q. How many blondes does it take to put in a lightbulb? A. Cause of 7,8,9!

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What can move people but not rocks.. Poop

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if girls witth big boobs work at hooters where does the girl with one leg work.... walmart

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Q: why did the girl fall off the swing?? A: because she had no arms or legs.

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Knock knock Who's there? Banana Banana who? Orange Orange who? Banana Banana who? I have AIDS

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why did the chicken cross the road? because it had earlier escaped from its cage and had since began to wonder around the local town

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What did the nintendo Wii say as it went down the slide? They don't talk.

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Susie sells seashells by the seashore. Susie was a schizophrenic bitch who caused irreversible harm to her family and those close to her. She also had underage sex with a black guy named John. He was actually a pretty decent guy, but he decided to smoke weed a couple times when his dad was going through some tough times. His dad resented him for this fact and it caused unresolved tension between them for years. This caused John to go out and seek younger girls to have sex with, to fill the emptiness he and his dad's relationship left him with. Meanwhile, Susie was falling in love with John, not knowing his many dark secrets he had tried best to keep hidden from her. Eventually, all of these things come out in the open, and Susie still respects him and ultimately loves him even more for being so honest.

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How to you kill two birds with one stone? You use a precision hunting rifle to mortally wound two flying birds, then put them on a platform and break their skulls with one rock. Separately.

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How do you keep an extraordinary magician from performing his show? Replace his shampoo with battery acid

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What do you call 2 black men next to me. 2 Dead Men

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Your mom walked into a bar and got kicked out cause there's no dogs allowed.

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Knock Knock? Whos there? Ching Ching Who? No...Ching Smith you racist!

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What did the black man watch basketball instead of Tennis? Because Basketball is a very popular sport to African Americans, and tests show they can just higher than Caucasians, Asians and Hispanics.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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