Why was the girl crying? She got kicked in the vagina

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Why did the monkey fall from the tree? Because he was dead.

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Whats worse then Justin Bieber? It's a trick question, there's is nothing worse than her

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Penis.

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Why did the plane crash? Because the pilot was a loaf of bread.

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Why didnt santa leave presents under the tree? Because santa doesnt exist.

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A man walks up to an attractive woman and asks "Is it hot in here, or is it just you?" The woman replies "No, it's hot in here. It is a record breaking 114 degrees outside, which means everybody is using their air conditioner. Due to the large amount of energy air condioners require, the power has gone out in this building and the air conditioner is not functional. The tempurature in the building is 103 degrees and three children are in the emergency room because of heat stroke."

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What did the boy with no arms get in his Christmas card? We don't know, he's yet to open it.

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why did amelia earhart get lost? because she was a woman

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Why was the crazy person allowed to leave the asylum? The ombusman's report will be on your desk this morning minister.

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oh hi, i'm an idiot, i mean mitt romney

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Girl: I love you in a platonic way Guy: ... Is that some kind of fat joke!

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How do you fit four gays on a barstool? You turn it upside down

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How do you say the weekend in French? The weekend in French.

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Why did Hitler try to take over the world? Hitler wanted to spread the Nazi (National Socialism) idea, He also wanted to destroy the Jews(Christian and non-Christian) and many other groups of people using the prevailing scientific idea of the day eugenics and survival of the fittest

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A mother with a bum hip and her son go to walk up a set of stairs in the mall. The floor was slippery because the janitor just mopped the floor. They decide to take the elevator instead.

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Hey, I just met you, And this is crazy. But I have Alzheimer's... Hey, I just met you...

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whats the difference between a chicken and a rooster. a rooster has a dick

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A man walks into a bar, sits down and talks to the woman sitting next to him. The woman took out a cigarette, and offered one to the man. The man said yes, even though he never smoked before, because he was trying to get with the woman. They smoked a few more before the woman left, and the man left shortly after. The man became a chain smoker and died 1 year later from lung cancer caused by smoking multiple packs a day.

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How do you get rid of a pile of dead babies? Call 911 so someone will pick them up and take them to the morgue.

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What starts with the letter P and ends with O-R-N? Popcorn

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Q: The red house is to the left and the blue house is to the right. Where is the white house? A: 3 blocks down from the red house

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What is worse than finding a real joke on Anti-joke.com? Starving children in Africa.

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What is the difference between my pet goldfish and an african village? My pet goldfish has water.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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