If it looks like a chicken and acts like a chicken, its most likely not a deadly crab running towards you with a knife that has rabies and is afraid of towels.

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There once was a man from Nantucket, His dick was so long it caused tremendous physical discomfort, and it was extremely difficult for him to find pants that did not reveal his freakish abnormality, and greatly limited his levels of intimacy. After botched reduction surgery, he was left without a penis at all and, realising the horrible irony, threw himself into a raging river (experiencing no shrinkage whatsoever).

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What's the difference between a baby and a trampoline? I take off my shoes when i jump on a trampoline.

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How do you drown a black man? You refuse to help him due to your pride and therefore you are no longer a decent member of society.

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What did the pretty young girl get for her birthday? Cake and presents (get your mind out of the gutter).

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A duct walks into a bar. The writer meant to write duck and then proceed to make a clever joke but instead a typo was made and a very unlikely occurence was writtern about considering air passages are not capable of walking and would most likely already be in the ceiling of the bar as too bring fresh air into the bar is important.

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Did you hear about the Mexican boy scout that helped that old lady cross the border.

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Q: How many kids with ADD does it take to screw in a light bulb? A: Let's go ride bikes!

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What is better than one wors roll - two wors rolls

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What's faker than Nicki Minaj's tits? Women rights.

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Roses are red Violets are blue The other color on our flag is white I'm an American and rhyming doesn't matter

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An old friend of mine had an idea. "Socks, but for your hands." I laughed until the day I heard he died of chaffed penis.

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How do you confuse a blonde? Inform her that she is an illegitimate child resulting from a vicious, torturous rape and that her mother will never truly love her.

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a young mother cow died in a street crossing by a large oil truck, she was never buried and became infested with maggots in the next few days

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how do you have a great time in a college town you don't

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What do you say to a man with no legs at a bus stop.. How you getting on.

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a black guy a white guy and a spanish guy walk into a bar, after they left the bar they became good friends despite thier differences.

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What did the cat say to the chicken? Meow

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Your dad is so old, he should go to a nursing home.

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What does a mexican do when he gets lost in the woods? He does his best to find food, shelter, and water until a search and rescue operation finds him.

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? Because it was stapled to the dog, which also fell out of the tree.

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Why was the Jew so happy? He had a good day

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Why was the bartender's baby crying upstairs? Because it was being raped.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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