What has four legs, is green and furry, and if it falls out of a tree it will kill you? A pool table.

Why was Timmy sore? He'd been playing with his cornhole along with his friends all day!

What's the difference between Rick Perry and a toaster? One is a republican presidential candidate, while the other is an electrical appliance.

A Jew, a Russian, and a Turk walk into a bar. The Jew asks, "Can I get a glass of Manischewitz?" The bartender serves him. The Russian asks, "Can I get a shot of vodka?" The bartender serves him. The Turk then asks, "Can I get a Turkish coffee?" The bartender looks at him, confused, and says, "Sorry, but this is a bar. Unfortunately we don't serve coffee."

Knock knock. who's there? your dead cat, here you go.

Why did suzie fall off the swing? Because She had no arms. Why did suzie fall off again? Becauze Jimmy was trying to snipe her in the head the first time

Roses are red violets are blue i got two fingers just for you/by kw

roses are red violets are blue i uhh umm hold on... the man with Alzheimers proceeds to think of the rest of his poem he wrote for his date, after an hour he remembers but his date has left and the staff proceed to guide him out and back to the insane asylum

Sometimes I sit in the bath and pretend im a bubble

what's the difference between a duck? You can't wash a window with a brick.

What's the difference between a gay white man and a gay black man? Nothing because they are both sexually attracted to men.

Q:Why did the Mexican cross the border? A:To come to America to provide for his starving family.

Whats worse than eating a worm? Haveing a worm die in your penis.

What's the differnce of victims of Brady and Hindley and a pile of dead babies? Some were born dead and others were raped then killed. Kelvin Yang.

A bus crashes and everybody dies.

Q:How come we have a black man in th white house? A: because we elected him

Knock Knock! ... Whos there? ... Daisy ... Daisy who? ... Daisy me trolling... ;)

Rim Ram Ree, Kick him in the knee, Rim Ram Rass, Kick him in the other knee

what did the apple say to the orange? -- NOTHING! APPLES DO NOT TALK!

roses are black your mamas white i didnt mean to say it but it's right

This joke is not funny, So don't read it.

Hear the one about the deaf guy? Neither has he.

why did the chicken cross the road? to get to the other side why didnt the chicken cross back? for the first time in his life, Clucky the chicken, felt liberated. his cruel life flashed before his eyes, forcing him to remember all the bad tines he had spent on the McKinley farm. all the eggs stolen from him, watching all his friends being taken for slaughter. it all came back. from the other side of the road, Clucky saw a place he never wanted to go back to, a place he wanted to forget. the day he chose not to cross back was the first real day in Clucky's life.

Did you hear about the kidnapping in New York? He woke up.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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