Q: Why was the american flag red, white, and blue? A:Because that's how it is!

thumb_up thumb_down -35

How do you get rich? Sell knives at warped tour.

thumb_up thumb_down -17

what's worse than finding a worm in your apple? alot of things, worms don't taste that bad.

thumb_up thumb_down -2

Knock Knock Who's there? Ben, you just called me. Aren't we supposed to go jogging. Oh yea, I lost track of time. Is it cold out? Yea it is. You should bring a jacket. Alright, can you get me a water? Yea, no problem. Thankyou.

thumb_up thumb_down -13

whats worse then finding a worm in your apple? getting stranded on an island with your best friend and realizing several days later that you will have to eat him to survive. hours after eating your friend a boat saves you and now have to live the rest of your life knowing you ate somebody.................... oh and the Holocaust

thumb_up thumb_down +34

A guy hit his elbow. Judaism.

thumb_up thumb_down -2

Where does a blind person drive a car? Into a tree.

thumb_up thumb_down -9

Whats the best thing about having sex with twenty eight year olds? There's twenty of them.

thumb_up thumb_down -9

What did the girl with no arms or legs get for Christmas? A bicycle.

thumb_up thumb_down +13

What is worse than ending and apple joke in the holocaust? Getting raped by a goat

thumb_up thumb_down +1

Why was 6 afraid of 7? Because 7 had two penises.

thumb_up thumb_down +35

am man walks into a bar, and suffers from brain damage

thumb_up thumb_down -8

why didn't the black kid make the basketball team? He has cancer.

thumb_up thumb_down +33

A pink bird and a pink elephant was out flying. Then something happened.

thumb_up thumb_down -24

Are you trolling with me? I mean how can you know where I live if you have not even picked up the phone yet? Listen, if you wanted to make me upset, you did it okay? You won, I like you a lot and I would never do such a thing. I understand you being upset Nero, I am so sorry, I never meant nor wanted for this to happen, I hope you can forgive me someday.

thumb_up thumb_down -25

your momma's so stupid, she starved to death in a supermarket i probably would too...considering all the good shit needs to be cooked

thumb_up thumb_down -4

Why did the boy not wake up on time for school? He was fuck in dead.

thumb_up thumb_down +27

What's harder than winning an argument with a woman. Lonsdaleite which has recently been declared the hardest substance known to man, and can withstand 58% more stress than the hardest diamond crystal.

thumb_up thumb_down +26

Q: What did the serail rapist say to his best friend? A: You're a good friend

thumb_up thumb_down -2

whats worse than 911 nothing you cant beat 911that sucked

thumb_up thumb_down -7

A: What time is it? B: Half past six.

thumb_up thumb_down -39

What did grandma receive for her 75th birthday? Alzheimer's.

thumb_up thumb_down +27

See now, that is because you consider yourself my submissive on a both concious and subconcious level, your body and mind wants me to take care of you. I could say it is because I read minds, but why read minds, when I can create them, why read the future, when you can create it. Finally, lets take a look into the word, nerve endings yes? Not nerve endings baby, its called Suggestion. But seriously though, lets put the word nerve endings on top of the word suggestions again there. Nerve endings, did I mention it works on your butt too? You see, usually you would say no, but you do know that now that I am your master, you do and enjoy as I say? See you baby. Moral: "Feel the grove, I control the way you move"

thumb_up thumb_down +23

Why did lil' Jimmy fall off his bike? The weight ratio between the left and right sections of his body became uneven due to some sort of change in the traction of the tires to the bumps on the road/ path.

thumb_up thumb_down +16

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops