I was trying to think of a joke to write, but then I became unsatisfied with my creativity and began to spiral into a depressing tangent of thoughts. I just took 37 Ambien, and have approximately ten minutes to live. Instead, I will spend my last moments writing goodbye messages to friends on Facebook and longingly looking at images of the past. Goodbye, world.

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Where did John go after the explosion? Everywhere.

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hey i just met you and this is crazy i have alzheimers hey i just met you

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how do you put a giraffe in a fridge? open the door, put the giraffe in and close the door. how do you put an elephant in a fridge? open the door, take out the giraffe, put the elephant in and close the door. the lion king is holding a conference in the jungle and all the animals turn up except for one, which animal is missing? the elephant, it's in the fridge. you come across a river you need to cross, but it is infested with man-eating crocodiles, how to you cross the river without dying? just swim across, all the crocodiles are at the conference.

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Yo mammas so fat she went on a diet.

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Knock knock whos there? I have no anus

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What's blck and blue and doesn't like sex? The ten year old in my car.

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A man is balancing on a bar. But it's a bar where people drink so I don't know how that works.

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What is green and can hurt your eyes? I don't know, but its definitely not a laser pointer.

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Why wasn't the chicken able to cross the road? Because it was disabled.

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person: Ask me if i'm a tree other person: are you a tree? person: no

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Uber Driver: "Hey I'm close, where are you?" Me: "oh, I see you!" Uber Driver: "Are you that guy in the middle of the road?" Me: "yeah, floor it"

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ilglsdfbvklwbkvbsjklgvsdgbvilsdbklvbwdjkbvwdfseghrfvuowebg

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I heard a scary rumor that when you plzy a windows istaller cd backwards, it plays a secret message, but what's even scarier, is that when you play it forwards, it installs windows.

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What do you do when a black person steals your computer Inform the authorities, as theft is a felony.

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What is a gremlin's favorite snack? Gremlins aren't real.

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What do you call 25 college teens at a party? A good time.

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Knock knock. Who's there? I am. I am who? I am pregnant.

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How many cupcakes are there in the world joe How many? I don't know I was asking you.

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Why do white people go to black people's yard sales? Because they know they sale good quality stuff -Travis

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wht does a blonde do with a box of crayons? eat a taco.

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What's worse than dying in the holocaust Dying on the last day of the holocaust

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Q: What did the bulbasaur say to the charmanderr?? A: bulbasaurrr

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So there are two skunks in a bath tub. One of the skunks says to the other, "Would you please pass the soap?", and the other skunk says, "What do you think I am, a talking radio?!"

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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