A Jew, a Muslim, and a homosexual jump from a cliff to see who gets to the bottom first. Who wins? Society.

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How about that airline food?

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Why did hundreds ofnpeople die in a plane crash? Because the pilot was a salad.

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Why did the man name his son David? He didn't. It was his wife's choice.

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Why did sally fall out of the tree? Because sally was morbidly obese and uprooted the tree from underneath her subsequently causing her to splash violently on the ground. Why didn't sally get back up? Because the splash caused the earth to spin at 40000 rpm into the sun.

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What did the chicken do before it crossed the road? Looked both ways and then crossed with caution while looking out for oncoming vehicles.

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What's the best Medieval job? A Jester because you get to play with balls all day.

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Whats the difference between wayne rooney and shrek? Well, one, shrek is fictional. Two if he was fictional,he is green. Wayne rooney is not green. Three wayne rooney plays for a football team, surely shrek has no idea what football is. The list goes on.

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Why did the man fall over...he had a stroke!

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yada yada

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why does Tom Sawyer like apples? He likes their flavor

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Batman vs Superman the movie spoilers: Batman and Superman argue over how to handle some alien invaders, Batman wants to kill em, Superman believes he can save em. In the end they work together and save everybody. Moral: I hope they change the script, ever noticed how every hero vs hero themed movie/cartoon, ends up with them allying at the end? If ya do not believe me, just wait for the movie to come out.

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What's the difference between a black man and a white man, a white man has lighter skin

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A Blonde walks into a bar. She is in an abusive relationship and drinking her pain away.

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I like school Said no one ever.

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why does one side of a v-flock of geese have more birds? Because it does.

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How do you get a women stop running a marathon? You tell her that you have AIDS and she should get herself checked.

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why did hellen keller kiss a girl? another blind date

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If you were a cactus, why?

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How did the little boy get out of the forest? -He didnt, he was devoured by a pack of wovles.

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Q. What did the farmer say when he lost his tractor? A. "Where's my tractor?"

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Eric went for a poo in the public toilets. After he finished, he realised that there was no toilet roll. So he had to just pull up his pants and put up with his sshitty arse for the rest of the day. Unfortunately, he was in a board meeting and when he went in he stank of shit and it was a very uncomfortable feeling.

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Two carnivorous dinosaurs get into a fight. Carnage ensues and many baby dinosaur eggs are stomped on, and in the end they both die.

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What's the difference between jam and jelly? Jam is slightly more viscous and may contain bits of fruit.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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