A: Why did the chicken cross the road? B: Why? A: If I knew I wouldn't be asking you.

An alcoholic walks into a bar. He wakes up the next morning in a jail cell covered in blood. 3rd time this week.

So I was blow drying my penis and my girlfriend asked what I was doing. Apparently, "heating up your dinner." wasn't the right response.

what did the lonely boy get for christmas? the absence of a familly

The Lord told Moses to come forth. He tripped and came fifth.

A man walks into a pole.

A mans wife gets pregnant after he has a visectomy... She was artificially inseminated using sperm he froze before the operation

Why do Iraqi women never sleep with American soldiers? Because Americans always talk about pulling out but they never do!

What's worse than a piece of food stuck between your teeth? I don't know, what? A cruise ship stuck between your teeth.

What do fat kids and whales have in common? Ruth burden

Why did the black man cross the road? To show the chicken that it isn't that hard.

There are two lawyers about to enter a court room. They look at each other shake their hands and then the defending lawyer smiles and says "I'm Jewish your f*cked"

Q: A black man and a Mexican are in a car. Who's driving? A:They both take turns, because they are driving across the country and it would be hard for one of them to drive the entire way.

How do you get a black person to drop chicken? Yell KKK.

Guy 1: Where's your dog Guy 2: I Dunno Guy 1: I ate it

Why did the wiener dog fight the cock. Because it was a cock-fight.

What's the difference between a baby and an onion? One is a vegetable and the other is a human being.

A woman goes to the doctor.....She has terminal cancer.

Where did Jimmy go after the bombing? Everywhere.

What's the difference between a watermelon and a baby? A watermelon is edible.

Women's rights

your mothers so over weight that when she jumps in a pool she displaces a proportionately larger volume of water then someone with less body mass.

How do u get a baby to stop choking? Take ur c*ck out if its mouth!!!

A horse walks into a bar The bartender says "Haha, sucker, this is actually a glue factory" The horse is brutally slaughtered and his remains are sold for a profit as part of a glue product

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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