A fat black guy walks into a pet store and asks if he can have a chicken. The cashier says "what do you want a chicken for?" He says " I need to lose weight so I'm hoping to eat its all natural eggs" So the cashier gives him the chicken and the fat black guy lost 50 pounds.

How do you make a momma bird not fly back to its nest? Burn it down!!

Roses are red, violets are blue, I'm not good at rhyming turd

What's the difference between a woman with an IQ of 160, and a man who is mentally challenged? The woman wasnt premature and abused from an early age.

Why was the T-Rex always sad? He couldn't clap his hands.

your mom is so ugly that she is still a virgin, you don't exist you are just a figment of my imagination.

You should really respect vegetables more. They rock. They're all like... AAAHH!!!... and I'm all like... DUDE! THAT'S SO INCREDIBLY RANDOM!... and seriously, you should respect da veggies!

women's rights.

how do you put a giraffe in a fridge? open the door, put the giraffe in and close the door. how do you put an elephant in a fridge? open the door, take out the giraffe, put the elephant in and close the door. the lion king is holding a conference in the jungle and all the animals turn up except for one, which animal is missing? the elephant, it's in the fridge. you come across a river you need to cross, but it is infested with man-eating crocodiles, how to you cross the river without dying? just swim across, all the crocodiles are at the conference.

What's long and black? A long and black object.

A man walks into a bar. The bartender lights him on fire.

Women's rights.

What smells worse than cow manure? Burning Jews.

What's funnier than the pope in a speedo? Humor is subjective, so answers vary from person to person.

A: How do you make a fire with two sticks? B: Ask your mother, we did it last night.

CFL

Joey mayer's face

Yo mommas so fat that when people look at her they say things like "shes bigger than me"

what would Michael jakson do if he was alive? scream and hit the top of his coffin

Why did the homeless man steal food from the local grocery store? He had not eaten in three days and was forced to steal or risk possible starvation.

When there's something strange in your neighborhood, who ya gonna call? The Police. There's something strange in your neighborhood.

whats worse than the holocaust? nothing

pleas help someone is in my house i think hes trying to kill me i'm not even joking.

Two Pigs are in a bath. One pig says to the other "pass me the soap", to which the other pig replies "Do I look like a typewriter?"

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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