one fish two fish red fish kill the fish

What's the difference between a baby and my trampoline? I take my boots off before i jump on my trampoline. . .

What do you get when you cross scabies with genital warts? Krusty Krabs.

I grunt when I poop.

whats the difference between 10 Ferrari's and 10 dead babies ? i dont have 10 Ferrari's in my garage

What's brown and green, has six legs and if it fell out of a tree it would kill you? A pool table.

Knock knock I don't even have a door just walk in

Has anyone seen Stevie Wonder's new car?! Nobody seen it?! He too!

What does a Jew and an oven have in common? Bagels.

Q: Hey, ask me if I'm a tree. ".. Are you a tree?" A: No.

You and your wife walk into a bar, you both order a drink and celebrate your good health.

Bob loves Anne. Anne loves Bob. No one cares.

A dyslexic canadian walks into an arab

How do you torture Helen Keller? Give her a cheese-grater and tell her it's a book.

whats black and blue and white all over A little caucasian boy who is being abused by his parents

you first

A man walks into the doctor's office for an appointment. The doctor performs the usual examinations, before asking the man to turn his head and cough. As is standard, he feels the man's genitals to check for irregularities. The man jokes, "Say doc, couldn't you at least ask me to dinner first?" The doctor replies, "You have testicular cancer." He died a month later.

What's the difference between a live baby and a dead baby? A dead baby doesn't cry.

How many chickens does it take to cross the road? It only takes 1 chicken to cross the road. You don't need a lot.

Roses are red, Violets are blue. Someone clearly messed up on naming the flower. Violet is synonymous with purple, Which is obviously NOT blue; It's the mixture between blue and red.

how do you kill a Jewish person? you don't that just fucking mean!

A Redhead, a Blonde, and a Brunette are all standing on top of a cliff in Ireland. They took a few pictures, and all in all it was a lovely vacation.

Why did the chicken cross the road? No one knows because humans do not have the capability of accessing the chickens brain to receive their knowledge and what they were thinking about in the past.

So Bob walked into his house after a long day at work and layed a rope on his bed. A few hours later his wife came home and found a beautiful tire swing in their backyard but her husband shot him self in his throat.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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