get it right up there, says jacob while with danni

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Q: What did the man ask the waiter when he was seated at Cracker Barrel? A: May I please have more golf tees?

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Good afternoon.

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A blond and his wife were in the hospital expecting their first child together. The wife gives birth to twins and the husband turns to her and says, "I can't believe we had twins. I'm so happy!"

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Why did the boy drop his ice cream? Because he was hit by a bus.

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, We have your test results, You have cancer.

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Why was't the Elephant allowed on the Airplane? He didn't have a boarding pass

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Why did the man with brain cancer die? He drove his Segway off a cliff.

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The guy told a funny joke. Why wasn't the other guy laughing? Because he was having a heart attack

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Uh Oh you just fell, So, So I've got one thing to say to you, And what's that Don't fall it gets you down!!!!!!!!

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Knock knock Who's there? The police. You are under arrest for sodomy.

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Hitler Call of Duty Score Kills: 6 million Jews Deaths: 1

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Who wakes up in the morning feeling like P. Diddy? P. Diddy.

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He is so gay that he likes penis.

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what is blue and fluffy, a blue fluff. what is red and fluffy, a polar bear wiped in red paint. you probably should not have done that because now the polar bear is chasing after you.

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oh hi, i'm an idiot, i mean mitt romney

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two muffins are in an oven and one turns to the other and says,'' hey, it sure is hot in here''. and the other one says," holy crap, its a talking muffin!''

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I used to work at a chemical plant manufacturing hydrochloric acid. I couldn't handle it. One day a container exploded and I got severe chemical burns on my face. The scarring is awful. It has ruined my life.

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What did the midget say to the leprechaun? Nothing.....midgets don't usually converse with leprechauns....and leprechauns aren't real.

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what is black and is a really bad neighbor. your bad neighbor wearing a black shirt.

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What do you call an Arab flying a plane over New York? The Pilot.

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why does the gay guy like anal-sex? because he's gay.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? The farmer dragged him.

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Why didn't Michael J. Fox feel the Virginia earthquake? He was on vacation in Maui.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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