A man finds a lamp in the desert. He picks it up and dusts it off. The lamp becomes cleaner.

What do an elephant and grapes have in common? They both have a trunk...except for the grapes

why did the jew drop his coin? beacuse a nazi killed him before he put it in his pocket

What was the sadest part about the four blacks who drove off a cliff in a cadilac? -The car sat five

why was the little boy sad? he found out that George Washington was dead.

What did one teacher say to the other teacher? We're both under-payed.

what do you call an octopus with 9 tentacles? a male octopus

Why was the alcoholic unable to pass a stool when he sat down on the toilet? Because he did it on the floor.

What's the difference between a lawyer and a leech? One is a blood-sucking parasite, and the other practices law for a living.

Q: What's the difference between a polar bear and a washing machine? A: Many things.

Q.How many babies does it take to screw in a lightbulb A.Babies are to young to screw in lightbulbs

And riiight after you... Hey its always ladies first.

why did the dead baby cross the road? it was stapled to the chicken

what is worse - this joke or the last one? what is worse still - sex what is worster - nothing that's not a real word what is wurst? a type of sausage

Why was the man angry? Because I slept with his wife.

Your mom is not fat!

XD That one was awesome Nero, for a moment I was really wondering if you refer towards a tough guy as yourself as a boy. Now you pretty lucky I like tough guys, and you always have a savage joke at hand don't you?

What do you call a guy with a car on his head? Immediate identification would not be possible. The man would be referred to by his estimated demographics. Circumstantial evidence and dental reports may be required for identification at which points the family's would be notified. Only after this will the man's name would be released to the media who would in turn report this.

Why did the white man cross the road? To pay his taxes.

have you tasted chocolate flavoured slurpee? no. i haven't either

Three men are on a plane. (Note, that this is a low-altitude plane, in which they are allowed to open the windows) The stewardess offers the first man refreshments. He asks for an orange. The stewardess agrees, on one condition: that he throws it out the window. Confused, the man complies, and upon receiving his orange, he throws it out the window. The stewardess moves on to the second man, who asks for an apple. The stewardess agrees, on one condition: that he throws it out the window. Also confused, the man complies, and upon receiving his apple, he throws it out the window. Finally, the stewardess moves onto the third man, who asks for a bomb. The stewardess calls secret service and has the man arrested.

Why did Sally eat popcorn? She was watching a movie

A guy walks in to a bar, waving a gun around. He acidentally shoots himself in the foot He died from the bloodloss.

How do you starve a Somalian? Too late.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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