OMG did you hear about the man who sky-dived from mars?!!!! No…. Me neither

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Why did the young boy drop his ice cream? Subscribe to find out; starting at only $14.99 a month! For more jokes similar to this one, subscribe to "Horrible Jokes" for $95 a month! Subscription Plans: - $14.99: Answer one joke per month - $49.99: The above plan... PLUS a free copy of "Antijoke, the book" - $99.99: A free cookie - $1099.99: A free cookie and a pass to the dark side - $0.25: Eternal happiness Order now for best prices! Or else we'll burn down your house and kill your extended family! Thank you!

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Why did Jimmy throw butter out the window? Because he had down syndrome

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how do you kill a Jewish person? you don't that just fucking mean!

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Why didn't the blonde have friends? She couldn't find them at the store.

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What did the girl get with no arms and no legs get for christmas? Cancer.

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If I said "This AntiJoke will get thumbs up" It will get thumbs up

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A man walks into a bar, sits down and talks to the woman sitting next to him. The woman took out a cigarette, and offered one to the man. The man said yes, even though he never smoked before, because he was trying to get with the woman. They smoked a few more before the woman left, and the man left shortly after. The man became a chain smoker and died 1 year later from lung cancer caused by smoking multiple packs a day.

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Roses are red Violets are blue I'm a paranoid schizophrenic and so am i

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-Hey, Larry! How much is one plus one? -Two

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my goldfish never writes me back when i send him letters

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there were two cyclists cycling at a steady pace down a main road in china, one irish and the other chinese. now they happened to be cycling at exactly the same time and exactly the same pace. why did the irish cyclist get pulled over and the chinese not? because the irish cyclist had in fact brutally raped and murdered a young child in his home town and then fled the country to china.

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what's worse than being hiv+? having full blown aids.

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Two gay guys hosted a barbecue. The music and food was great. Everyone had a good time.

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Why did Susy fall off the swing? Because she had no arms. Knock knock! Who's there? NOT SUSY!

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What did the contestant say to the game show host? If I don't win I will arrange to kill your family.

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Do you know why Justin Bieber is so successful? Because he is a talented dancer-singer who was lucky enough to be discovered by pop music icon Usher.

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Q: Why did the plane crash? A: Because the pilot was a loaf of bread

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Why wasn't Pat able to get an erection? Because Pat is a girl.

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Why couldn't Michael ask out Mary? Because Mary had been dead for dead for 10 years.

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Why are black people afraid of tigers? Because tigers eat people

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Knock knock Who's there? Doctor Doctor who? Good guess!

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they say that cancer can't pass but why do three our your uncles have it

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What do you call a midget cripple with cerebral palsy? Unfortunate

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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