what do you call cheese thats not yours? A: stolen cheese.

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How many average men does it take to screw in a light bulb? One.

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“DTF”? Says Will. “No” says Harper.

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what is the difference between my girlfriend and my black pet bunny .... i raped my black pet bunny

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Why did the clown fall out of the tree? He got shot.

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What's funnier than a dead baby? A dead baby in a clown suit

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I have an excuse why one leg and one arm ar shorter than the ather two. I was born sideways and pulled out by an arm and a leg, trust me im not stupid or gay... ASSSSSSSSSSSHOLE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!..........................That was my turrets kickin in and i have dislexia if i didnt spell turrets right

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Why was the boat red and sticky? A boy dropped his slurpee. What were you thinking?!

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what did batman say to robin before getting into the car? get in the car.

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What's the difference between a jew and a pizza? A jew is a person contending to the faith of Judaism, and a pizza is an Italian flat normally round or square baked good consisting of dough, tomato sauce, cheese and various spices, and is sometimes enjoyed with toppings such as meat or vegetables

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What did the boy with no arms and no legs get for christmas? A bike

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How may Alzheimer's patients does it take to screw in a lightbulb? To get to the other side!

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What did the Black man say when he just got home from work? "Hi honey, I just got home from work."

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Whats long, hard, and has cum in it? Cucumber

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A blonde, a brunette, and a redhead walk into a bar. They order a few drinks, chat, and walk out.

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What do you get when you cross Chuck Norris with a Cheetah? A yellow Chuck Norris with black spots.

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What do you do i a stranger offers you candy? Make sure its not stale then jump in his van.

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What do you call a dear with no eyes? no eyed dear what do you call a dear with no head? dead!

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A blind man walks into a bar, bystanders help him up.

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how do you get rid of your home work? give it to your dog!

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hiya

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Why was young Timmy Crying? Unfortunately he had a very rare but serious heart condition and he would probably die within a week.

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How do you kill an elephant? -With a gun? No, an elephant gun. How do you kill a red elephant? -With an elephant gun? No, with a red elephant gun. How do you kill a blue elephant? -WIth a blue elephant gun? No, you choke it until it turns blue and kill it with a red elephant gun. How do you kill a purple elephant? Theres no such thing as a purple elephant, thus contradicting the reality of performing a major act of animal abuse on it.

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My mumma your mumma live down the street 18,19 marble street out came you and out came me but then your mumma died from her pee

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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