How do you get your little brother to stop kicking you? Stick his feet in the garbage disposal.

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Knock Knock Come in

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what did one lady say to another lady? we are both ladies

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There is a bus full of puppies and babies with a plane flying above it carrying 2 tons of explosives. The Bus arrives safely at its destination.

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In particle-joke physics, the antijoke is the extension of the concept of the antiparticle to the joke, where the antijoke is composed of antiparticles in the same way that the normal joke is composed of particles. Furthermore, mixing jokes and antijokes can lead to the annihilation of both, in the same way that mixing antiparticles and particles does.The result of antijoke meeting jokes is an explosion.[1]

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What did the ethiopian give his wife for her birthday? HIV

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A baby walks into a bar, I find that very unlikely as very few baby's can actually walk.

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What's worse than standing in line at Walmart? Being raped. What's worse than paying an outrageous amount for whatever it is you bought at Walmart? Being pregnant with a rape baby.

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whats the difference between a ferrari in my garage, and a pile of dead babies in my garage. I do not have a ferrari but i do have a pile of dead babies

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What's red and invisible? No tomatoes.

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Why was Katy Perry naked with your mom? Because they were having sex

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Waitress: Would you like to have a drink? Customer: (Looks at the drink's menu) Hmmmm... What are my choices? Waitress: Yes and no.

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What did the Dinosaur say to the Seal? Dinosaur's cant.. wait...

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Liverpool City Football Club

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Q: Why did Timmy cry? A: You would too if you had your arm cut off

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a jew, a gay, and an irishman walk int a bar at different times during the span of 5 hours.

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"Why did Suzie fall off the swing?" "She had no arms." "What did Suzie get for Christmas?" "Cancer." "What's the difference between a Lamborghini and a tub of dead babies?" "I don't have a Lamborghini in my garage." "What did Suzie get for Christmas from me?" "My tub of dead babies."

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I asked her where you were.

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What do you call a dead blonde in a closet? A rape victim.

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What is brown and smells like sh!t Actual sh!t

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*insert joke here*

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What do a baby and a slinky have in common? They both bring a smile to your face when you push then down a flight of stairs.

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What happens 2 seconds after you thorw a rock out a two-story window? The rock hits the ground.

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A boss walks into a bar and hires the first man he sees. He fires everyone else, no matter what their occupation.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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