Hook a finger from each hand in your mouth, now pull so your lips are tight and try to say "I was born on a pirate ship" I'm sorry, I can hardly understand you.

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I have read the terms and conditions

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You cant spell chorus with out... Vagina!

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Q.what does the kid scream when he see's a creepy man in a big van pull up? A. ICE CREAM!

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A horse walks into a bar, and a man says "Hey, why the long face?" The horse calmly turns to him and replies, "Because I'm a horse you drunk moron."

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A little boy asked his mom what fucking was, so she showed him.

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Why did Sarah fall off the swing? She had no arms. Knock knock. Who's there? Not Sarah.

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What's red, hairy, and squishy? Helen Keller in a blender.

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What happens when you throw a penny between two Jewish men? Probably nothing, but one of them might pick it up and ask if you have dropped a penny.

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what is long, black and looks like a curly-hair? A curly-hair

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What do you tell your dad if he constantly gripes about his balls? He's got testicular cancer and he's going to die a horrible painful death.

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Roses are red Violets are blue I'm a paranoid schizophrenic And so am I

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Why Did The Chicken Cross The Road To Get To The Other Side

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Why is Helen Keller a bad driver? Because her inability to see or hear makes her an extremely dangerous road hazard.

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Knock, Knock. Who's there? Dave. Dave who? Dave proceeds to break into tears as his grandmother's Alzheimers has progressed to the point where she can no longer remember him.

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What is small, black, and loved by children? An oreo.

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How do you find the richest person in Mexico? You take a survey of all citizens that live in the country of Mexico, find the wealth of each individual person, and whoever has the most money is the richest person in Mexico.

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7

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Roses are grey, Violets are grey, I am couler-blind, and poetry is gay

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What the hell are you doing?

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What would you get if you crosses a potato and a frog? Nothing because potatoes cannot breed with animals

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the WNBA

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what do you call a starfish living 500 miles under the sea? A starfish.

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MLG 420 NO SCOPE THE JEWS

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops