How do you identify a Chinese tank? They smash their own people.

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what did the man say after he fell off the cliff nothing, he's dead

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How many Alzheimer's patients does it take to change a light bulb? To get to the other side.

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A man walks into a psychiatrists office with a banana in his ear. The psychiatrist says, why do you have that banana in your ear. The man says, "What?" The psychiatrist says, "I said, 'Why do you have that banana in your ear?" The man says, "What?" The psychiatrist shouts, "I SAID, WHY DO YOU HAVE THAT BANANA IN YOUR EAR?" The man says, "Sorry, I can't hear you, I'm deaf."

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whats helen kellers favorite activity fingering herself

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Two scientists walk into a bar, the pair walk up to the counter and the first scientist says, "I'll have some H2O." The second scientist says, "I'll have some H2O too." 10 minutes later, the second scientist dies.

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What do you get when you cross a leopard with a camel? Sacked from the zoo.

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(Man #1): Do you know how I know you're gay? (Man #2): How? (Man #1) When I kiss you, you kiss me back...

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A man went in for a doctors appointment and said, "Doc, it hurts when I do this." The doctor responded, "Try to abstain from from putting stress on that area. It might alleviate the pain a bit."

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Q:what does your face and this site have in common? A:both are poorly constructed

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Knock knock. Who's there? Navy Seals. *BOOM* *waiting* "Yeah, he's dead." -Navy Seals

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What has a fiery tail and is mentally handicapped? Charetard.

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Why does Susie fall off the swing? I shot her in the head with a pistol.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? It didn't. The chicken got crushed by a fridge.

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What did the blanket say when it fell off the bed Awwww sheeeeeeet!

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What's the difference between a zit and a priest? These two things are so different that I couldn't list all of the differences in this text box.

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Whats green, has 4 legs and falls out a tree? A pool table

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Why did George smoke weed? Because he was depressed after his wife died and couldn't get over the fact that he would be lonely forevermore.

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What's the worst way to say you want to break up? Kill her dog.

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What's the heaviest part of an elephant? Its body.

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What do you call a qoman with 10 kids? A mother with 10 kids

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Once upon a time there were seven dwarfs. They were named Steven, Jason, John, Peter and Alfred.

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Hitler and Jews become friends.

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Whats funny about a blonde, brunette and red-head stranded on an island? Nothing. They are in a very dangerous survival situation, which could prove to be fatal

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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