A man came home from work and said to his wife im going to kill u

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Women's rights

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What are vampires favorite drink? Vampires aren't real.

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What's easier than taking candy from a baby? Almost nothing.

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How do I make my penis 12 inches? Tug on it.

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How many Jews can you fit in a car? It really depends on the make and model of the car, as well as the relative size and weight of the people in question, but legally you can only have as many people in the car as there are seatbelts available for them.

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How do you wake up Lady Gaga? Poke-'er-face

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roses are red and violets are in fact violet

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A: Knock Knock B: I'm sleeping!

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yo momma is so stupid she went and got her self checked for mental retardedness and it turns out she happens to be autistic.

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Why do seagulls live by the sea? Because they wouldn't be able to live anywhere else.

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Q: What did the bulbasoar say to the charmander? A: bulbasoarrr

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Roses are red,violets are blue you want me but i dont want you!

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What did the boy with no arms and no legs get for Christmas? Cancer.

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What did Billy get his dad for Father's day? Nothing, his dad was killed by a spinning helicopter blade when Billy was 3.

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whats worse than a worm in a rotten apple? 2 worms in a rotten apple. whats worse than 2 worms in a rotten apple? 3 worms in a rotten apple. whats worse than 3 worms in a rotten apple? the haulocaust. whats worse than the haulocaust? 4 worms in a rotten apple. wait wait...that was rascist,nevermind this joke.

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What did the blind man look at when the girl showed him her cleavage ? ... Nothing... He's blind... >_>

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'l give you a nickle to tickle my pickle i'l give you a dime to take you time

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Tim: Hey Jennifer, do you wanna hear a joke? Jennifer: Okay Tim: Knock knock Jennifer: Who's there Tim: It's me Tim, you idiot

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, I'm a schizophrenic, And so am I.

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So there is a white guy and a jewish guy walking, they find a penny on the ground who takes it? The white guy because he is in debt.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? He didnt, he got hit by a bus.

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What have in common a recently born baby and a quadriplegic blonde person? Both have legs but they cant walk

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Why did the man crossed the busy road? Because he was sick of life.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops