What do you call a nun in a wheelchair? Virgin Mobile

Welcome to the anti-joke Olympics! As you can see ladies and gentlemen, our contestants are starting to look very excited as the "who can look the most bored" competition is just about to begin! We are terribly sorry to announce that as for the butterfly style contest, all of the butterflies drowned :( While at this corner, we can see these contestants have been waiting patiently for hours for the "who is the most impatient" contest to begin! While over here, none of our contestants have yet to make a chicken cross the road and tell them why! In the meantime watch as we mistreat these Jews in order to find out what is worse, the holocaust or a worm in your apple! So far our contestants with worms in their apples are complaining more, but dying significantly less, how will this end! How exciting! Finally our swing contest has been cancelled as Sally refuses to get on it! Moral: BUT WILL IT BLEND!

how did the monkey fall out of the tree he was stupid how did the monkey get a black eye he was hit by a bus how did the monkey end up in the sewer he got hit by another bus

What does it mean when the drummer drools out of both sides of their mouth? That they've may have had a stroke and you should immediately call 911.

how do you make coffee you put it in a mug

What did the rock say to the tree. It didn't say anything, rocks don't talk.

A sad horse walks into a bar. The bartender asks "why the long face?" the horse answers "My wife was just diagnosed with terminal cancer."

(SAY KATCHUP AND LICKER AFTER EVERY SENTENCE) FOR BREAKFEAST I HAD (KATCHUP AND LICKER) FOR LUNCH I HAD I SEE MY GIRL FRIEND AT THE MALL SO I (KATCH UP AND LICK HER

What is red and cry's? A baby chewing on a razor blade

once upon a time jess was happy this once upon a time was a very long time ago, BABADOOK !

Roses are red... Violets are blue... Unless your colour blind.

A jew goes to a bar,then wakes up with presents under his candels.

What do you call a woman outside of the kitchen? Out of place.

what did the woman say when her husband punched her? nothing. she was physically abused for 35 years before she killed herself

You might be a redneck. Sorry.

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PENIS

what did the blind and deaf kid get for Christmas? cancer

what do you call a black man with no arms or legs sitting on a porch? "sir" His life is hard enough with out being subject to social rudeness

Whats blue, fuzzy and has little red dots all over? Beats me...

Why did the dinosaur rent a DVD in Redbox about a sex? Because he didn't own a Blu-Ray player.

Q. Why was 6 afraid of 7? A. Because 7 was a scary dude.

What did the man do when he went to the toilet went toilet

Why was the black man running? Because he was playing capture the flag.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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