What did the snow flake which could talk say to the other snow flake which could talk None of us are the same.

Why am I losing my time writing this joke even knowing that I will get lots of thumbs down?

How do you make a clown shut up? Throw a axe at it!!

What does a Jew do when he finds money on the street? He picks it up and is probably happy it was there.

what do you get if you cross the mafia and the yakuza? a hefty bounty on your head

Roses are red. Violates' are blue. Hitler is my homy.

What is the difference between Barack Obama and Simba from the Lion King? One is a cartoon character from a beloved Disney classic and the other is the current President of the United States of America.

What would you call the fatty cranial mass surrounding a malignant tumor? Ted Kennedy's Head.

why didn't bob die? because he liked his hair just the way it was.

What did the Cow say to the Chicken? Nothing animals cant talk

I like my coffee like my women. Without a penis.

What did the tree say to the kite? She got hit by a fridge.

How do you make a baby cry? You punch him him the gut and slap him multiple times.

I love you You love me We all grab 2X4's Barney's on the floor No more purple dinosaur.

What's white and very boney? A bone

Roses are Red, Violets are Blue I've just bought a chainsaw, and I will now decapitate you.

Yo momma's so fat that her weight is completely disproportional to the average weight of someone her age.

Once upon a time there was a nice old man who loved to ride his bike... He unfortunately died when he had a heart attack.

Why was Emily in Alaska? Because she and some friends had been playing Simon Says at a birthday party, and the dad had said 'Simon Says go to Alaska'.

what did the boy with no arms and legs get for chrismas ? cancer

Think of a number between -1 and 1 That's how many friends you have

What did Cinderella wear at the ball? Clothes

What is the difference between a black guy and a bucket of shit? The black guy is a sentient human being, and the bucket of shit is just a metal container filled with feces

Knock Knock. Who's there? I don't know.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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