What would you do if you're eyes just suddently exploded? You would never see again.

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A dyslexic man walks into a bar, he doesn't let a minor disablity distract him from having a good time.

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A guy finds a lamp in the desert and rubs it 3 times.. No genie appears because there is no such thing as Magic.

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Why did the little girl cry? Because she had just witnessed the slaughter of her entire family and friends in front of her eye, leaving her not only peerless and alone, but also with the mental scars which come with witnessing such a harrowing ordeal.

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why didn't the unicorn have a horn? It was a horse. Why didn't the horse have a horn? it was not a unicorn.

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What would a man say if you urinated all over his legs? WHAT THE DEUCE?

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Three blondes were walking through the forest when they came upon a set of tracks. The first blonde said, "Those are deer tracks." The second blonde said, "No, those are elk tracks." The third blonde said, "You're both wrong, those are moose tracks." They were moose tracks.

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Why didn't Jacob marry Bella from Twilight? You have to be real to marry someone

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Why did Susie fall off the swing?? ShE had no arms. Knock knock... Whose there? Not Susie

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what's the difference between a chicken and a grape? They're both purple........ except for the chicken

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Why did the girl fall from the tree? Gravity.

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Whats worst than being stuck in a cage with one blonde? Being stuck in a cage with four blondes.

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I like my coffee like my women, without a penis

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Did you know Helen Keller had a Playground in her back yard? Neither did she.

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Nero? You are alive? Holy shit! You are like so my hero! I love you man! I was so saddened to hear you where tortured and killed, but then I read about this "Axel Knight" and hoped it was you, it sure sounded like you! Please tell me its no joke, you are a hero around these parts, and we really miss you, honestly sir, is it true point zero has become some sort of utopia or are the painkillers making you a bit Hazy? I am Erica by the way, still with the order, but what is this about your empire?

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Have you ever treat woman like sandwich? Elephant and walrus said Jews are troubles. If six plus nine is five, chickens will eat you, saturdays.

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Life gives you lemons you make lemonade. What do you do when life gives you melons... youre skrewed.

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Why did Chuck Norris start crying? Because he was in a coma

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How do you stop a canadian from saying eh? Kill it...

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ever tried african food? they neither

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Knock Knock. Who's there? The police. You're under arrest. The police you're under arrest who? Sir, if you don't open up the door we're going to have to open it ourselves. We have a warrant for your arrest. Sir if you don't open up the door we're going to have to open it ourselves we have a warrant for your arrest who? Sir we are authorized to use deadly force. If you don't comply we will shoot to kill. Sir we are authorized to use deadly force if you don't comply we will shoot to kill wh-

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How did Helen Keller's parents punish her? They sent her to her room without dinner.

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What's worse then finding 10 babies in 1 trashcan? Finding 1 baby in 10 trashcans.

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Why didn't the black man finish his lunch? He wasn't hungry

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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