Roses are red Violets are blue The last time I saw your mom I made you

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How do you survive a tornado? You dont.

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What's red and green And moves at 300mph A frog in a blender

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Why did the chicken cross the road? It didn't, it was hit by a truck.

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What did the mute say to the deaf man? Nothing becasue a mute is a person who cannot speak and a deaf man ould not hear the jumbled mumblings anyway.

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sorry about this, my enter key is stuck down... Really sorry guys. Nearly fixed it. Look I said I was sorry! All fixed :~D

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N e one else find the girl in the cellar from the new evil dead creepy ? Like shes some real demon being used by the movie industry to scare people? (serious qestion)

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A wise man once said, "Your life is your habits." So simple yet so true. My habits include: Breathing, having my heart beat, producing brain waves, and other regulatory bodily processes.

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what is the difference between gravel and dead baby guts? i dont eat gravel.

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How do you kill two birds with one stone. You don't its not humanly possible because birds cannot be killed with rocks.

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what happens when a panther and a gorilla fight? i dont know i never seen it before.

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? IT WAS DEAD.

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what do you call a black man in the bank holding a bag of money. One wealthy man

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What's black and gets in trouble a lot? A dog with black fur that has not been well trained.

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Knock knock Who's there The mailman The mailman who? You are so dumb.

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Shakespeare walks into a bar, Having just seen someone that has been dead for over 400 years, the young man in the corner quits his drug addiction; it was clearly messing with his brain.

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Q:how man ADD kids does it take to screw in a light bulb? A: I dont know, wanna go ride bikes?

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SCENES WHEN TOM O'SHEA GETS STABBED IN PRISON AFTER STEALING THE WHEELS OFF AN AMBULANCE

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Where do rabbais go to shop? At the supermarket like everyone else.

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Why did the whale cross the road? He was being chased by the Japanese.

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How did Alice get revenge on Diane when Diane called her fat? When Alice was pregnant, she stabbed herself in the stomach and blamed it on Diane. Diane was then sent to prison for murder and received a sentence of 25 years. Alice laughed in court, and Diane was forced to commit suicide. Alice then stole Diane's husband, and she lived happily ever after.

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How do you get a cat out of a tree? Throw a jar of foreskin at it.

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Why did the fat chick have a camel toe? She was half camel

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How babies can you fit in a car seat? 1

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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