how do you stop a baby from crying? hit it with a brick.

What did little Suzy get for Christmas? Molested

What is Green and smells like Yellow Paint Green Paint

Q: How do get a person to leave you alone ? A: Suck out his eye-balls stuff them in your ears to muffle the sound of his screaming as you head-butt him into a fine paste. Then proceed to spread or squeeze sed paste on to delicious food substance and eat sed delicious food substance. Then carry on with the rest of your day like nothing happened. (P.S. Just ignore any letters about court cases or arrests)

Why was the boy sad? He had a frog stapled to his face.

Is your friend gay? Yeah, duh, of course he's happy.

Grease is the word that you heard it's got groove it's got meaning

Why is lewis rank gay Coz he is

Why did a kid throw a clock out the window? Because he was adopted

What looks like a 50p and has a narrow back?

Why did the boy fail his test? He didn't study.

Why isn't this joke funny? Because it has no point.

I was on Facebook today. Opened someones wall. Read "LIKE if you know someone that needs to be smacked in the face with a shovel." So I liked it and wrote my exboyfriend's name.......

whats worse than a baby in a bathtub? its dead. Whats worse than that? its in a clown suit. Whats worse than that? The baby had down syndrome.

How did the Holocaust start? Hitler threw a penny into the oven

Why wouldnt NASA send a blackman into space without a space suit? Because space is a vacuum there is no air no atmosphere the tempurature is almost zero kelvin so if you ever go out int space please dont take off your helmet out there because you would freeze to death almost instantaniously.

what do you get a man with no arms or legs for his birthday? a quick, painless death.

Q: What did the dog say the cat? A: nothing, because dogs cannot speak, and even if they could, I highly doubt they would speak cat.

Q: Why did the baby cross the road A: He was stapled to the chicken

Roses are gay, Violets are gay, I am gay.

Why did William go home. His mother called and they were having a potroast

what do you do when you see a black man getting hitted by a Mexican taxi? -Call 911

what did the boy with no arms and legs get for Christmas? a bike

I was walking on the beach when I heard a man yell "Help, Shark, Help!" and I laughed, because I knew the shark wasn't going to help him.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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