How come Hellen keller is blind and deaf? Cause she is a women.

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What did the woman do when her husband told her to make him a sandwich? She made him a sandwich promptly.

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How do you dance to the black eyed peas? You don't you listen

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What is the difference between a circle and a cylinder? dunno

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I'm not saying my mother-in-law is fat, because she is anorexic.

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What's worse than dropping you ice-cream cone? Signing your post on Anti-joke.com

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Q: what do you call a drunk blond? A: a cab

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Why do showers in Germany have 11 holes? Because a regular human on has 10 fingers.

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A Sloth runs...

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a plane crashes on the boarder of america and mexico where do you bury the survivors. you dont bury the surviors

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A man was found dead, in an ice cream van, the other day. He was covered from head to toe in hundreds and thousands, with two flakes sticking out of his ears. The police say it was a tragedy and will be informing his next of kin in the next few days.

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How many blondes does it take to skrew in a lightbulb? Usually just one.

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I think I am done here friend, it always comes to this, it has always been easier for me to repair whatever is wrong with others and get my kicks out of that, as I know I can and will repair everything wrong with myself, but its hard as hell, I mean I never give up, ever. But that does not change the fact that I am broken, and that simply deciding that I am not, is far from enough, its a choice indeed, but its like deciding to constantly walk trough hell, and sometimes that hell is also called living, that too is always a choice, And believe me, I would never quit, I guess that if this hell I struggle trough has so many nice things in it, it just feels like hell at times. I mean the main motivation behind my ability to help others, has always been searching for answers low and high, and when what I have learned trough life helps others, but barely scratches the surface of the armor I am confined within, I lose hope, do you believe that my desire to help humanity grow, derived from my own incompetence at curing myself?

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, when the bass droped, my balls did too.

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Why did the blonde get fired from the M&M Factory Because she repeatedly wrote Ws

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Q: What kind of bees make milk? A: Boobees

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A: Knock! Knock! B: Who's there? A: Kitchen B: Kitchen who? A: GET THERE!

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What's the answer to all your problems The answer

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What is black, white, and red all over? An interracial couple being murdered

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Q: What's brown and sticky? A: A stick.

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what did the ninja say to the watermelon ? nothing

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Q. What's white and lives in a tree? A. A fridge.

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Roses are red violets are blue I would test our new water bed so be carefull with your helled shoe!

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There was a blond girl and a brunette girl. The brunette had a pink shirt that had " Abercrombie & Fitch" on it. The blond looks at the brunette and asks, where did you get your shirt?

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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