Why does Santa live in the north pole? Because his spicy body fat keeps him warm.

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Is your refrigerator running? Go fuck yourself

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Why was six afraid of seven? Because chad makes babies cry.

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What the difference between a duck? One of the legs is both the same.

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Little Johnny is sleeping overnight at a school camping trip. The teacher goes around to check tents to make sure everybody is falling asleep fine. Little Johnny, however, says, "Miss, I am scared of the dark. Can I sleep in your tent instead?" The teacher reluctantly agrees, finishes checking around and brings Little Johnny to her tent. "Miss, can I play with your belly button with my finger? My mommy lets me", asks little Johnny. The teacher reluctantly agrees. Suddenly, the teacher jumps up. "THAT WASN'T MY BELLY BUTTON!", she shouts. "Yeah," says Little Johnny. "Well that wasn't my finger, either."

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why did the semen cross the road? i wore the wrong sock today.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? I don't know. Me either. Well, later. Later.

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what do you call some one with no arms and no legs? names.

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why didn't the kid win the talent show? He wasn't talented.

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whats 2+2? 4

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What's worse than failing out of high school? Finding out your mom has cancer.

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I you beat Chuck Norris in arm wrestling, you will be proud of yourself and he will go home with nothing.

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watashi no namae wa ramune desu

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I baked you a pie! Oh boy! What flavor? Apple.

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what do you call a black pilot? A) a pilot

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Q. What do you call a blonde in a library? A. Lost.

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What do you call a black person who flys a plane? Well, first ask for their name, then address them as such.

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What is a panda bear? A bear with black and white fur.

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What did the coal miner get for Christmas? Black Lung Disease

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Why couldn't the boy see the pirate movie? He was blind.

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Legal Mexicans in Texas

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Youre in your car, and you stop at a light you see a home less person holding a sign that says "Home less and hungry, anything helps." You ask if they want a box of cereal, "No thanks." They replied, you ask why not? "Well, I really just want to go to the movies."

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Granny P-O-R-N!!!!

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whats worse than getting lost in europe? becoming the middle in the human centipede.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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