Why did Lucy fall off the swing? She had no arms and legs Knock knock Who's there? Not Lucy

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Q:Why did Sara fall off the swing? A: Because she has no arms. ..... Knock knock! who's there? Not Sara, she has no arms and doesn't have the abitlity to knock.

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This is not a good joke.

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Give to the less fortunate. Date ugly people

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Q: If it takes a chicken a day and a half to lay an egg and a half, then how long would it take a monkey to kick the seeds off of a dill pickle. A: I don't know. That's a stupid question.

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What do you call it when a multiple personality disorder person masturbates? Rape.

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I met a man today. His name was John.

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How do you make a lumberjack cry? By murdering his family.

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I saw a shooting star. It shot me.

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Whats worse than being a black guy? NOTHING.

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Why did the man start vacuuming his neighbor's floor? He had to get the GSR

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Hellen Keller went to town, riding on a pony, stuck a feather in her hat and called it ERRMMMMM UAHHHHHHHH...

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What does a plum and a rabbit have in common? A: they're both purple, except for the rabbit!

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A monkey and his owner walk into a bar they sit down at the bar... I dont know the rest of the joke but your moms a whore

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There's a blonde, a brunette, and a redhead who sit next to each other in college. They are good students and regularly do their homework.

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That awkward moment when you thought this joke was going to be good but you thought wrong. Keep looking for good jokes.

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What is underneath Chuck Norris' Beard? His Chin

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whats the differnece between a bag of dead babies and a ferarri? nothing ill never have either

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A black man and a mexican are in a car. Whos driving? The cop. The two men were best friends who had taken off from their law firm. Alex had recently gone through a divorce and John decided to take him on a trip backpacking across Europe. Rain had come upon them and an off-duty police officer picked them up and took them to a nearby hotel. The three men had drinks and the friends had a wonderful time. But Alex never got over Jenny leaving him. 3 months later John found him dead in his home by auto-erotic asphyxiation.

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A rabbi walks into a bar mitzvah

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a older brother and a lil brother have bunk beds, one night the older brother has his gf sneak over, they are going to have sex. he tells his gf, "say lettace for a new positon and say tomato for stop", they start and she screams, "lettace, tomato, lettace, tomato". then the lil brother says " will you guys stop making salad, ur getting mayonase all over my face!!!!"

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What has two wheels, two arms, and a head? A man in a wheelchair. Why was he in a wheelchair? He stepped on a landmine. A man walks, I'm sorry rolled, into a bar.

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you

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whats long hard and full of seamen? a submarine.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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