roses are red violets are blue me + you =the perfect 2

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What hurts like hell? HELL

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Knock knock. Whose there? Not my house so not my problem. Frankly, I don't give a shit.

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Whats worse than bad sex. Being nice raped in the anus by a teletubby.

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What did the boy with no arms and no legs get for Christmas? nothing he was Jewish

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What has four legs and a tail? A table with a tail

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what do you call a girl with a pumpkin spice coffee in her hands? Jenifer

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"Knock knock!" "Who's there?" "Sally." "Go away, Sally. I told you I am not interested." Kevin slammed the door on his colleague, as Sally proceeded to find somebody else and move on with her life. Kevin later in life became a drug addict, and got thrown in jail. Sally got married and had four kids, and while she feels bad for Kevin, she is happy with her life.

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"Up to 50% off."

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whos gay and sits next to me? Griffen in my architecture class

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What's worse than the Holocaust? Finding a worm bitten in half in your apple.

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There were 3 children: Flower, Petal and Fridge. Flower asked, "Mum, why is my name Flower?" to which she replied "Because a flower was the first thing to fall on you when you were born." Petal asked, "Mum, why is my name Petal?" to which she replied "Because a petal was the first thing to fall on you when you were born." Fridge said, "Herp derp dur" to which Fridge's mother replied "Shut up, Fridge."

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3 blondes were walking when they come upon some tracks. The 1 blonde says they're deer tracks. The 2 blonde says they're elk tracks. The 3 blonde says they're moose tracks. While they are all arguing about what type of tracks they are, they get hit by a train.

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Statistically 9/11 Americans wont get this joke. But 7/7 British will.

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Whats worse than finding a worm in your apple Finding multiple worms in your apple

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How do you choke a lawyer? You squeeze his neck until he stops breathing.

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Pull over dat ass to fat, no seriously your blocking a firelane

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A man asks a young woman at a party if a rag smells like chloroform. She doesn't respond because she's passed out. He takes her to a nearby bedroom, rapes her, and leaves the party promptly. He'll probably victimize many other women with this method.

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Roses are Red, Violets are Blue I hi Jacked your car And killed your family

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A man throws a penny off of a cliff. He is now one cent poorer

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Keanu Reaves

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Q.What do Santa Clause and a grape have in common? A.They both have beards. Except for the grape.

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Roses are red Violets are blue I have herpes You should probably get yourself checked.

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How much money did the pirate pay for his ear to get pierced? Nothing, given that he is a pirate. It was probably done at gunpoint.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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