Why did the man cross the road? Because he couldn't get his dick out of the chicken

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What is green, walks on four legs, and is capable of the strongest bite in the world? An alligator.

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An Asian fails their maths exam.

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What does a black guy and an apple have in common? They're both apples except for the black guy

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once opon a time. never mind i'm just going to beat you kids.

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Dislike this.

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Why did the plane crash? Because the pilot was a loaf of bread!

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What's the difference between peanut butter and jam? Peanut butter is a food paste made primarily from dry roasted peanuts, while jam is a product made with whole fruit, that is cut into pieces or crushed.

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Why did little Sally drop her ice cream? She got ran over by the school bus

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How do you get a girl out of a tree? You throw a refrigirator at her.

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what goes plop, plop, fizz, fizz? baby twins in an acid bath.

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What do you call a Muslim flying a plane? A pilot.

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Did you hear the one about the man who went into the jungle wearing nothing but leopard print underwear? He was suffering from psychogenic fugue disorder and had no idea who or where he was. He was eventually eaten alive by a flesh-eating centipede. When his wife found out, she committed suicide.

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What do you can a preschool on fire? A very dangerouse situation

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What happends to a monkey without arms.. He bleeds..

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did u hear the one about helen keler neather did she

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What did the black man buy at the fruit shop? Some bananas.

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Roses are red, Violets are blue. I have a gun! So I KILL YOU!!!!

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How many electricians does it take to screw in a lightbulb? One.

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What did the greeter at walmart say to the black man? Welcome to walmart.

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What did the Catholic Priest say to the Altar Boy shortly after sex? Nothing. The feelings of shame and revulsion the priest felt about what he had just done meant he couldn't look him in the eye let alone talk to him.

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Knock Knock whose there brian Brian who oh because im chinese you assume my second name is Hu? terribly sorry theres been a misunderstanding, i was asking you surname, i should have been more specific! No it my fault, i dont know why i overreacted my second name is Hu its ok, what can i do for you? is it allright to come in for some noodles? are you paying? only a reasonable price ok then, dont see why not

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You are so ugly that when you were born the doctor didn't say anything to your mother because he has social manners.

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Nicolas Cage's acting.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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