What did the dog say to the tree? Bark.

thumb_up thumb_down -3

How does a penguin make pancakes out of skis? Purple because it's the best.

thumb_up thumb_down -25

Why did the police suspect a Hispanic man of theft? Because they found his fingerprints at the scene.

thumb_up thumb_down -11

what did the super popular, beautiful girl say to her stalker? i dont know, i wasnt the stalker.

thumb_up thumb_down +14

facebook is like a refrigerator. you eat it.

thumb_up thumb_down +4

A man walks into a bar. The bartender asks "What can I get for you?" The man replies, "a drink"

thumb_up thumb_down -13

How do you wake up lady gaga? First you simply whisper in her ear telling her to wake up. If she doesn't, simultaneously whisper and tap her gently. If you have failed to achieve your accomplished goal, repeat step two however intensely touch her and project your voice when telling her to wake up. Step three, get a... WAIT WAIT!! I just waisted 20 seconds of your life, you're never going to meet her.

thumb_up thumb_down -5

What did the horse say to the other horse? Neigh

thumb_up thumb_down -18

What do you get if you cross a Sheep with a Kangeroo. An abomination unto God.

thumb_up thumb_down +54

Johnny has 30 pints of ice cream. He eats 25 pints. What does Johnny have? Diabetes. Johnny has diabetes.

thumb_up thumb_down -5

What did the homeless man get for Christmas? A warm meal thanks to a Charity organization.

thumb_up thumb_down +57

Why did the squirrel cross the road? it was stapled to the chicken

thumb_up thumb_down +19

What did the orphan kids get for Christmas? Cancer.

thumb_up thumb_down +10

how are a plum and a rabbit the same? they are both purple except the rabbit

thumb_up thumb_down -3

Roses are red My parents are dead I am Batman.

thumb_up thumb_down +26

What happens when you go swimming in the rain? You get wet.

thumb_up thumb_down +5

YO MAMA SO SHORT she should really consider wearing long tunic-like blouses, prints that contain vertical stripes, and heeled shoes with a pointed toe in order to create the illusion of length to her silhouette. That having been said, society's limited definition of beauty is quite inadequate for the diverse world in which we live.

thumb_up thumb_down -4

They say that men are from Mars, and women are from Venus. If that is true, then who on Earth are we? [L]

thumb_up thumb_down -6

this anti joke will likely be the most liked one out of all the anti jokes.

thumb_up thumb_down +13

What do you call a fat ginger kid? Whatever his name is.

thumb_up thumb_down +10

Why was six afraid of seven? Because seven threatened six's family after insinuations of seven being a cannibal.

thumb_up thumb_down -5

one of the idiot

thumb_up thumb_down -23

Do not believe the sentence below. Believe the sentence above.

thumb_up thumb_down +8

Why was jimmy crying? He had a frog stapled to his face

thumb_up thumb_down +50

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops