Why did the first Monkey fall out of the tree? He was dead. Why did the second Monkey fall out of the tree? He was tied to the first Monkey. Why did the third Monkey fall out of the tree? He thought it was a game.

Brain fart

What do you call an Englishman, an Irishman and a Chineseman playing football? 3 friends playing their favourite sport.

i hate it when Voldemort showers in my nutella

How can you avoid being hit by a car? Don't get in the way.

Person 1: today my doctor said I'm dyslexic Person 2: oh yeah? Are you ahdd too?

Ask me if I'm a kangaroo Are you a Kangaroo? No….

Why is Skrillex so bad a fishing? He has Parkinson's Disease

Q:Why did the boy drop his ice cream? A: A terrorist threw a refrigerator at him then slapped the ice cream out of his hand

Why wasn't the woman in the kitchen? Because she was in the living room.

Why did the boy not wake up on time for school? He was fuck in dead.

Doctor: Knock, Knock Patient: Who's there? Doctor: The interupting doctor Patient: The interruptin.... Doctor: You have aids.

Knock Knock Knock Knock Knock Knock The person you are seeking is deaf and cannot hear the sound that is made when your knuckles come in contact with the door. Try calling next time..........

what do you give a little girl with no legs and no arms for christmas...................cancer

why cant helen keller drive? because cars werent popularly accepted when she lived.

A British man walks into a dentist's office.

What do you call a black man in a pumpkin patch? His name is Bill.

What's red and a cow? Red cow

How did the frog fly? It drank a magic potion. How did the snake fly? It ate the frog How the the eagle fly? It already can.

Q. What did Batman say to Robin before he got in the car? A. Robin, get in the car.

There was a horse in a very hot sumer day. He was in the middle of corn field It was so hot that the corns started popping out. The horse thought it was snowing and died of cold.

how do you know an elephant has gotten into your refrigerator? The fridge is on its side, the door is torn off, and the ruined food scattered all over the floor. Not to mention there is an elephant in your kitchen.

Why did the cookie go to the hospital? Because he felt crummy.

Why did the man break into the bank? Because he was a bank robber

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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