A baby seal walks into a club.... Oh....

John Jacob Jingleheimer Schmidt has a really long name.

69

Why couldn't the black man swim? He has no legs.

why did the black man jump higher than the white man he was on a trampoline

I'm not saying your mom's ugly, but I like pancakes.

Why does Chuck Norris own a can named Chuck Norris? because he is self-centered due to all the attention payed to him for virtually no reason at all.

What do Micheal Jackson and Niel Armstrong have in common? Armstrong did the earthwalk on the moon and Jackson F#$%ed little boys in the butt.

Why was Michelle crying? I don't know. Neither do I.

Josh is sooo great at blowing, xoxo Dylan Hodge.

Roses are red Violets are blue I hate rhyming Penis

Man: Drink this. Man 2: Ok. (Drinks it) Man; You drank a powerful substance that is 20000 times stronger than hydrochloric acid! Man2: Oh FUCK! Kelvin Yang.

Roses are red, Violets are blue. Leaves are green, You should know all this by now...

Knock Knock! Who's there? Hitler.

What do you call a man with no arms? A cripple.

Why did the black homeowner default on his house? He was paying significantly more in mortgage than the actual market value of the home, since he purchased his property before the housing bubble. He carried out a cost/benefit analysis and derived the conclusion that he was effectively destroying his own wealth by paying his mortgage bills.

What do you get when you combine a baby and a chainsaw? 30 years to to life in prison.

Hey I just meet you And this is crazy I took bath salts Your face looks tasty

What is black and bad for your teeth? A cannon ball

why does the room smell bad? because there's a dead body under the bed

Why are black people afraid of white people? Over two hundred years of oppression.

There are four worms walking in a straight line. The first worm says, "Hey, there's a worm walking behind me!" The second worm says, "Hey, there's a worm walking behind me, too!" The third worm says, "Hey, there's a worm walking behind me, too!" The fourth worm says, "Hey, there's a worm walking behind me, too!" How can this be? ...the fourth worm lied!

What's black and white and red all over and can't turn around in an elevator? A nun with a spear through her back

Why do people make antijokes? Because they can

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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