I used to have a shirt just like yours, except it was green. And it was a bicycle.

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Why did the beachball get sad after it was deflated? Beachballs don't have emotions.

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Why did the blonde tattoo her zip code on her stomach? She wanted a tattoo.

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Why did the kid cry? He had a frog stapled to his face.

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what did johnny's mom do for his 50th birthday? she died

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My friend was in court for stealling smoothies so i told him to plead innocent and received 10 years in a federal prison and a fine of up too £5000 pounds

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in soviet russia, cow milks you

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Tom and Phill are eating ice cream Tom challenges Phill to a contest to see who can eat their ice cream in one bite Tom finishes his in two bites Phil in one Then he looks like he got a brain freeze Tom notices and says "You idiot: you got brain freeze!" Phill turns around and says "No, I have a brain tumor."

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What starts with F and ends with U-C-K? Firetruck

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Donald Trump

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what do you call Mackenzie Phillips? five head

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Two Mexicans are at the border and want to cross it. How do they cross it? Illegally

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Why did Suzie fall off the swing? Because she had no arms. Knock knock Who's there Not Suzie.

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What do you get when you cross a dog and a slice of tomato A really bad joke

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why did the chicken cross the road? to get to the other side.

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your mamas so fat she tried to hang herself but the rope broke.

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Your mother is so stupid that she has trouble discerning certain facts from fiction.

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N-E Pats never cheated

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Q. Why couldn't the blind black guy read. A. He's Dead

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Why did the bear fall down? I shot it. Why did the second bear fall down? It tripped over the first one.

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Whats worse than sour milk? 911. Whats worse than 911? drinking sout milk!

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What did the guy day to the other guy with an afro on his head? You look like a guy with an afro on his head.

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a

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If Abraham Lincoln were alive today, he'd be really really old.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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