Q. Why did Steve Carell, the 40 year old virgin, fail to get laid? A. Erectile Dysfunctioning.

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Whats red and smells like blue paint? Red paint.

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Why did the girl go to the hospital? She had an asthma attack.

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Guy: If you can guess what's in my hand, you can have it. Girl: If it fits in one hand, you can keep it!

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It's only racist if you consider them people.

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Ching Chong Bing Bong.. Yoyao? Dat U?

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Scene:restraunt Me:can I have a coke please? Waiter:sorry we don't have any, is Pepsi ok? Me:is monopoly money ok?

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Why did the chicken cross the road? The bold and unpredictable female bird escaped under the horror of the fearful fence of which enclosed the innocent chickens. As she wandered towards the nearby city of magic and dreams she approached by a large, empty road. A mysterious, shining object in the distant caught her eye. As she slowly to a shivering step towards the intereging sparkle, she was ran over by a car. EPIC FAIL LOL!!!!

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What requires lots of rubbing, dirty pictures, and leaves you happy for a little bit, but then you realize you're sad and lonely? A minimum wage job where you clean pictures.

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Your mother is such a whore that she engages regularly in acts of consensual but unprotected sex with various gentlemen.

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Your in a building there's no windows ,doors and a sement floors and u only have a mirror and a table how do you get out You look in the mirror see what u saw take the saw saw the table in half two halfs make a hole clime out the hole

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Whats the difference between Lady Gaga and a man? Nothing. I was lying about their being a difference.

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*knock knock* "who's there?" "me, the person who knocked..duh"

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I have read and agree to the terms of service.

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Why did the black man skip every other step on the stairs? Because he had long legs and it was faster.

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Why did Sally fall off the swing? She had no arms

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What is cold? Winter

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What's black and looks like Burnt Popcorn? A black man

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What's the difference between an ostridge? It can neither fly.

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Stop being a centipede

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A fat man and his dog walk into a bar...the man buys a beer and walks out

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um...... What's worse than 15 babies stapled to trees? sixteen babies staples to trees PS: I will stop posting if 3 people don't like this by tommarow.

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What happened when the man crossed the road? He lived happily ever after because he looked both ways for traffic.

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? It died.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops