"Would you like to see our stool samples?" asked the salesman. 10 minutes later, I left with 3 new bar stools.

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How do you confuse a blonde? To get to the other side

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A horse walks into a convenience store. He grabs a pack of gum, pays the man at the counter, and walks out.

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acuna

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Why is the grass always greener on the other side? because they have a landscaper.

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What do you call a black guy selling drugs? A pharmacist.

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whats red and green and has 8 wheels. a stick

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What Starts with P and ends with O-R-N? Popcorn.

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True or False : it would not cause a public disturbence to express your pornography to the public??? ture. pornography is the freedom of speech and ability to express oneself

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A man walks into a room with a sly grin on his face, "Tom, have I got a joke to tell YOU!" Tom hurriedly shoos Susie into her bedroom and tells her to lock the door and not open it no matter what. Tom turns to the man, "I've told you twice before to never come back here, I'm beginning to think that you probably don't take what I say very seriously because you might have some sort of chemical imbalance or something in your head, or maybe you're obsessed with my family or something!" The man hangs his head in shame and agrees with Tom, but Tom still had to do something about the intruder so he called the cops. The cops took him to get psychologically analyzed, but Tom didn't know this because he only cared that his daughter Susie was safe and he also doesn't have access to the testing facility's records. Tom is an only father.

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'THIS IS NOT A JOKE, YOU ARE THE 1000000TH VIEWER'...

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Why did the child die? Natural causes.

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Why did the insect play marco polo? It couldn't. Marco polo requires multiple players.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because chickens have 2 legs

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How many stripes does a Zebra have? Doesn't matter millions of people died in the Holocaust

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Why can't Helen Keller drive? She is blind and is therefore ineligible for a driver's license.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? It wanted to.

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Why did the baby start crying? Its mom slapped it in the face, causing permanent brain damage that would haunt it throughout its life.

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why did the chicken cross the road? well... to get to the other side.

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What's the difference between a tree and a lamp? One is a tree, one is a lamp.

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Why weren't u sad when your sister died? You lived in a hut and were supplied with food for a week

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Q:Whats 2+2? A: 4

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What do you tell a woman with two black eyes? Domestic violence is a crime. She should leave her abusive partner and seek help.

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:3

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops