Sherlock Holmes and Dr. Watson are camping out. After they set up their tent and get inside to go to sleep, they look up at the stars. Holmes asks Watson to make a deduction. "Well, Holmes, I think it's highly probable that other planets outside our own, among those many stars up there, could have sentient life." Holmes points up and says, "Someone stole our tent, you idiot."

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Rose are Red Violets are blue I have 5 fingers The middle one is for you.

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Why did schlomo fall off the swing He lost balance because Muslims threatened to kill him

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Why did Sally fall off the swing? She had no arms. Knock knock (who's there?) Not Sally.

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Q. what tall and looks like a jew? A.TODD

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Why did the woman leave the kitchen? She had finished her breakfast and had to get to her job as a firefighter.

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You know what they called Obama in highschool? Nigge*

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fhfhfjjil;tyjgfkileg ryj ftrgndfhuiltyjgn

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Chuck Norris never shows emotion!!!... because he is a pragmatic person and thinks in a more logical manner.

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A guy walks into a bar and tells the bartender to give him any drink. The bartender gives him the drink and the customer instantly dies. Another person in the bar asked the bartender what dring did you give him. He answered back.....poison

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What's black, white, and red all over? An African American and Caucasian man painting a house with red paint and accidentally spilling some on themselves

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Friends are a lot like trees... ...they fall down when you hit them multiple times with an axe.

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I just started the seafood diet. It consists primarily of eating fish due to its high nutritional content.

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How did the black guy survive from drowning? Years of Swimming lessons at his local YMCA

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hi iggy

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What's black and full of coke? a bottle of coca-cola

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An Englishman walks into a bar.

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Why was 2 afraid of three Because it bigger

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whats the diffrence between love and faling in love when u love some one your not falling

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How long did it take Jeff, a middle-aged man with a lifelong speech-destroying lisp, to overcome his impediment? Less than ten minutes, as carbon monoxide is a colorless, odorless toxic gas that eliminates oxygen at a rapidly-acting rate inside of small areas such as the car Jeff locked himself inside.

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kushagra tyagi

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What is brown and sticky? A stick

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John walked up to his dad one morning and shouted, "Dad, it's my birthday!" Dad said, "Cool, how old are you?" John says, "I'm seven!" Dad tells him to go downstairs and tell his grandpa. Johnny runs down and says, "Grandpa, it's my birthday, guess how old I am!" Grandpa sticks his? hand in John's pants and sticks his thumb into his anus. As he pulls his hand out, he pinches his penis. Grandpa says, "You're seven." John says, "How did you know?" Grandpa says, "I heard you tell your dad upstairs."

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Why did Susie fall off the swing? She has no arms. Knock knock. Who's there? Not Susie.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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