Why was the Jewish man in jail? He lit a local CVS on fire.

Knock Knock Who's there? re-posession officers

What's black, white, and red all over? Many different things are black, white, and red; to list just one would be an unfair judgment of things containing these three colors.

Why don't aliens eat clowns? Because the paint used on their faces makes the extra terrestrials leery of lead poisoning.

Roses are red... Violets are blue... Unless your colour blind.

What did the PC say to the Mac? Nothing you idiot! Computers can't talk.

Any similarity between Jesse and a human is purely coincidental!

What's the most confusing day in the ghetto? Fathers day.

there was once a time before tht time when there wasnt bonerss there were erectionss CC

What's wrong with a muslim flying a plane? Nothing you racist

Man: Doctor doctor I feel like a pair of curtains........ Doctor: You clearly have Alarming mental issues perhaps a psychologist would be the right person to discuss this matter further

Just happy you are back Nero, I have no idea what a proxy is but I am at my mum`s place, is everything alright between us now?

Why did the cow say moo? Cows can't say anything they actually make noises that humans interpreted as "moo"

what is worse than a pile of dead babies? the one on the bottom trying to eat its way out of a pile of babies that have been poisoned.

men

How do you get a clown to shut up? Hit him in the face with an axe

How do you starve a black person? Hide his food stamps in his work boots

Whats the difference between a dead baby and a Ferrari? The baby is not a car.

Three men walk into a bar, they are promptly served and then they go home. Later that evening the bartender closes the bar and goes upstairs to his apartment where he is struggling with his debt... Business hasn't been as good these days.

Why did the chicken cross the road? He farted

A: "Knock knock." B: "Who's there?" A: "John Doe." B: "John Doe who?" A: "..."

There were three blondes hanging off a freezing cold helicopter. A burnette, a red head, and a blonde. The redhead's hands were getting cold so she let go so she could blow on them to keep them warm. She fell off the helicopter and down the cliff. A little later, the burnette did the same thing, i mean their hands were cold. But the blode then said " guys, your doing it wrong. You have to do it like this." She blew one hand at a time, " not like this: she showed them how they did it and fell off too.

"Wow, that was so funny i fell off my dinosaur!" Dinosaurs went extinct in the late Cretaceous period, about 65 million years ago. Commonly believed by scientists across the world to have been caused by an ancient meteor that crashed in the current day Yucatán peninsula in Mexico. Also, even if you were around during the Cretaceous period, i assure you that no dinosaur would let you climb on top of it, let alone ride it while you're not highly terrified because of the sheer danger of the experience. Now unless you are 65 million years old, I highly doubt you laughed so hard that you fell off the dinosaur that you supposedly own.

Two girls were taken away mysteriously in the night. The next day, no one cared because they were orphans.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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