one day a boy was in his bed he woke up and stepped on his carpet,he then got out a bowl and some breakfast, 23 minutes later the boy rode to school on his bike and parked it in a bike room, he then sat down at his seat and pulled out his history book and waited for Mr Jonty Nicholls to finish his coffee so he could learn about hitler.

Why did Steven Hawking walk into a bar? He didn't he can't walk

what did batman Say to robin before they got into the car? get in the car

A: Whats black and hangs from my tree in my backyard? B: What? A: Blackberries B: Blackberries grow on bushes

Knock Knock Who's there? Cindy Cindy who? Cindy your neighbor. I was wondering if I could borrow some milk, I ran out.

how do you get the high score on doodle jump? jump from platform to platform without falling or being attcked by various monsters.

Why did the plane crash The pilot, being an uneducated pilot, crashed the plane as he didn't have proper training, and the whole of the passengers died.

What's the hardest part of the vegetable to eat? The wheelchair

Roses are lamp, Violets are squirrel, I have ADHD, LET'S DANCE!

What's the difference between a banana and a monkey? They're both yellow, except the monkey

What did the apple say to the orange? Nothing because their both fruits.

What did the blonde say to the brunette? I'm sorry your brother died

what did the dead cat say to the dead dog? Nothing, they're dead

Grandma used to say "you only die once." Years later, I learned the wisdom behind those words.

why are you reading this? You are bored out of your mind and don't want to do you're homework. and now that you read this, you will realize what you're doing and will now get back to work.

A rabbi, a nun, and a homosexual walk into a bar. They proceed to get drunk, and party like its 1972. Oh yeah. And your dad was just killed by a refrigerator.

Want to hear something funny? Sure, what? 9/11

What's worse than an avalanche? Being raped in prison.

Why can't Helen Keller drive? Because she's dead.

What has five balls and hates Mexicans? The lottery.

Do I know any jokes about sodium hypobromite? As a matter of fact, I do. It goes: "Do I know any jokes about sodium hypobromite? NaBrO."

Why did the chicken cross the road? Okay, seriously I'm done. I try to make a joke but I don't think I can do it anymore. I'm not funny I'm just a little coward who offers nothing to life. I should just kill myself. Fuck this joke, fuck you.

I don't always drink beer, but when I do, I have a pint or two.

What did the boy say to the elders at the senior center? Dayum, you're all ugly!

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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