Why did the chicken cross the road? To run away from a fat emo girl with a knife

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A man walks into an exam room for a doctor's appointment. The doctor proceeds to perform the usual examinations, before asking the man to turn his head and cough. As is standard, he feels the man's testicles to check for irregularities. The man jokes, "Say doc, couldn't you at least ask me to dinner first?" The doctor replies, "You have testicular cancer." He died a month later.

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Roses are red, Bacon is brown, this poem makes no sence, BACON!!

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How do you make a 5 year old cry? Kill their parents.

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Why the kid fall of his bike? He got hit by a fridge.

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What's long and black? A black hockey stick.

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What would George Washington say if he were alive today? WHAT THE **** IS WRONG WITH THIS COUNTRY!

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How did Helen Keller's parents punish her? They sent her to her room without dinner.

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If you were on an island with one wish what would you wish for? To get off the island

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Next season on teen moms, Justin Bieber tells her story.

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What do you give a man who has everything? Syphilis

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What did the strawberry say to the grape? Nothing, inanimate objects can't use verbal communication.

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Knock Knock Who's there? Its the pizza man. Get your yellow no good keister off my property before I pump your guts full of lead. 1,2...10

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Guess what your birth certificate really is. An apology letter from the condom factory.

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what is the difference between two trees? it doesn't matter because motorcycles don't have doors

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Why did the Mexican steal a pack of tortillas? To feed his family. He didn't have the necessary funds to pay for it.

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cool story babe. now go make me a sammich.

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What did the blind man say when you asked hi his favorite color? Nothing he is death too

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Why did the white woman press charges against the black guy? Because he raped her

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What's the difference in a big brother and a wee brother? Ones big, ones small.

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What is the opposite of Obama? Mitt Romney because he his white and a republican so all is good with him.

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Q:what did batman say to robin before they got in the batmobile? A:get in the batmobile

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What did the mute guy say to the deaf guy? *awkward silence* What did the deaf guy say to the mute guy? *Awkward silence....huh?*

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SC Johnson a Family Company

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops