What did the cat say to the dog? Meow

I'll take a Reuben, light sauce, and could you do Provolone instead of Swiss?

Q: What is red and smells like blue paint? A: Green paint.

What's black and white and red all over? A penguin inside a blender.

she wasn't 18

I Stumbled this site and then read some antijokes, then I wrote a antijoke but I couldn't write a antijoke because their Terms of Service were down so then I lied to them saying I've read their Terms of Serivce and then I lied again, told them I were human, argued by saying "barnote plate" to them. They accepted.

Why did the kid lose his nose? because his brother chopped it off with an axe.

a jew, a gay, and an irishman walk int a bar at different times during the soan of 5 hours.

Why didn't the skeleton go to the dance ? "because he had nobody to go with" No because it was dead.

Q. What's brown and circular? A. MEATBALLS!

There was once a little boy... Boy: Daddy, I am so proud of you that when I grow up I want to be just like you! God: Son how dareth thou! That is a horribleth and shameful wish! I just called the adoption agency thy areth noteth my... er.. sonneth anymoreth! NOW GO TO HELL! Oh, and you get same powers as I by the way, just for Good measure or something, except I can destroy you whenever I want, I just do not want to because your evil will hopefully make me look good in comparison after I rid the world of the first testament anyways :P Boy: Yay? :( Where is hell by the way? Moral: That little boy grew up to become... SUPERMAN! While Satan never discovered what hell was since its a concept added by corrupt priests around the 1700`s in order to scare people into following their God instead.

What has 2 legs and bleeds a lot? Half a dog

cc

why did the chicken cross the rode? so it can get the seed that is between the two yellow lines, and then he walked back without getting hit by a car.

I like colin but not as much as apple

Then lets give this another shot, this time we stop questioning how to make others happy, and if that is what makes us happy, then we ask: What else.

Why did the man sit down? Because he was tired of standing up.

What Do You Call A Swimming Banana.. Nothing Bananas Are Inanimate Objects Therefore It Would Be Impossible For It Swim

Covietz has a large penis

What's worse than biting into an apple and finding a worm? Getting raped by a giant scorpion.

Whats wrong with me? Your alive.

roses are red violets are blue i have AIDS now so do you.

Wanna hear a Harry Potter joke? Knock Knock Who's there? You know You know who?

roses are red violets are blue tulips are white daisies are yellow

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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