Where do you find a dog? At a pet store.

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Chuck Norris once punched a horse in the chin. Nearby people were disgusted at this act and immediately reported him for animal abuse. Today he is in prison

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9/11

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why did the girl fall off the slide? she was pushed, by her dad...

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Whats worse than a truck full of dead babies? A live baby trying to eat his way out.

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a. how did you shoot the rabbit? b. with my banana

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What did the black basketball player say to the white basketball player when he lost? Good game.

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What's sad about a house on fire?, it was my house.

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What's the difference between men and women? I really can't tell anymore, there's so many goddamn transvestites.

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This is not an anti-joke... A man is walking down a street and see's a small boy crying in an alley. The man walks up to him and asks him "What's wrong little guy?" The boy replies that his family is poor, they just got evicted from there house and his parents decided to kill themselves. The man decides out of guilt to bring the boy home and support him for a few days. Three days later the man see's a note on the couch that says "Thank You..." Signed Jamal. The man sighs and says to himself "Your Welcome." The man walks into his room and see's the boy's body in his closet. He starts hysterically laughing and cries into his pillow for many minutes. When he is done sobbing he asks himself "What could be worst than this?" The man walks to his kitchen asking that question over and over. He reaches into his cabinet and grabs his cereal and pours into his bowl. The boy walks out chuckling and says, "Bye bye..." The man was poisoned and died. Now the boy get's the other cereal out and is about to pour it only to find out it was empty. "Screw the Holocaust this SUCKS!!!!!"

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The Yak, a long-coated bovine found in the Himalayas, is named for its distinct call, which sounds similar to "yak-yak-yakyak".

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Why were accents created? So when people go to Texas they come back sounding like a D-Bag.

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What did the cashier say to the customer? You're total is $27.95

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How do you make a baby cry ? Throw a brick at his face

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What do you call a blind guy in a library? Kevin. Unless his name isn't Kevin.

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what do you do to gay guy who wants to have anal sex with you? beat him with a steel baseball bat in his face.

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what happened to the batsman with bad footwork? he got out what did the batsman do when he got out? he left the ground due to the nature of the ruling

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jwe

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Whi can't John sleep? Because he is dead!

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Why don't mummies take vacations? They're dead.

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So a black man steals a bike Because it was unlocked, and that was just poor planning.

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A man on an airplane is extremely frustrated by a small, screaming child. He puts on his headphones and listens to music.

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ded on boomer and aodddan

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because it had escaped from the farmer's field. The family were not too disheartened, as the rest were still contained.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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