What's more fun than throwing a dead baby off a cliff? Go-carts

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Me: What's the difference between a zebra and a slice of cheese? You: I don't know Me: Me neither

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Roses are red, Violets are red, Trees are red, Bushes are red, HOLY SHIT MY GARDEN'S ON FIRE!

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Why did lil yazzy watch The Hills at 12:40 in the morning? Because she was casually surfing netflix and clicked on it.

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How can you tell I'm the biggest idiot in the room? Look at me.

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What did Dave tell me on Tuesday? "It's Wednesday, dumbass."

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What is white, black, and red all over? A: A zebra being slaughtered.

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You have friends

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Sweet! I've just received my free minecraft giftcode! >> Minecraftcodes.info <

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Man sees a hot girl. The hot girl sees him. The man asks her out on a date. After five years of dating he asks for her hand in marriage. She says "No way, I'm married you horror!!!" The man cries and moves in with his mom... Two days later he commits suicide.

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Why did Helen Keller's dog run away? It didn't. She was capable of loving and caring for a dog.

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What did Batman's mother say when it was time for dinner? Nothing, Batman's parents are dead.

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Why did the beach ball pop? Because it stepped on a sharp chocolate chip cookie!

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Knock Knock Who's there? Banana Bananas can't talk.

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What do you give hobos? Febreeze

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When did Osama Bin Laden die? Nobody gives a @!?$

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What's better than your first Hanukkah? Not being a Jew.

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Whats better than winning gold at the special olympics? Not being retarded.

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What happened when the princess kissed a frog. Warts, all over her lips

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Roses are red violet are blue i saw a machine and it was ps2

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Knock, knock. Who's there? Nick. Nick who? Nick Wyatt

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How much wood would a wood chuck chuck if a wood chuck could chuck wood? The woodchuck's ability to chuck has been left indeterminable. Therefore until the wood chuck's prowess in wood chucking is brought to light we must leave it a variable. Using the coefficient (L) to represent wood that can possibly be chucked. Then using (C) to represent the life cycle of said wood chuck chucking. We are also assuming this woodchuck will remain vigilante and not require food or sleep for the entire duration of chucking ultimately lowering is maximum chucking output. From this we can determine the W.C.P.S. (wood chucks per second). Finally subtract the remaining wood (RW) from the chucked total and we have rendered that : L(W.C.P.S) - (C -RM/t) = X

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Q: What did the blonde woman say when she got slaped by her friend? A: Ow.

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Why did Ben Franklin Invent Bifocals? He's a jive turkey.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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