Roses are red, but there are also pink, white and yellow varieties Violets aren't blue, they're violet, hence the name I've got OCD And my poetry skills are also lacking.

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pretty soon we'll all be dead

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What's longer - 'an african american phallus' or 'a micronesian sphincter'? 'An african american phallus has' 24 letters as opposed to 'a micronesian sphincter' at 21 letters, so it is longer.

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What's red, white, and blue? light purple

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patient: Doctor, doctor, i think i'm a lemon. Doctor: racial segregation and presidency is my middle name.

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Far from, yet all organizations are money based and put capitalism in front of all, so if lets say, one organization, needs help from another, a money transaction is made, I play a role there, as a well... Diplomat, its not my title, but my title is something I cannot reveal to anyone, not even my wife, id be putting myself and people in danger, but since I master things such as hypnosis, I can well, influence people, this is how I can pull of favors myself. Not favors such as "kill that guy for me", but more like... In your case. "If you are going to kill the wizard, please let the rest be, I know they are good people"

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Why didn't the chicken cross the road? Cause he was a chicken.

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What's the difference between a black man and a Jew? Their ancestral heritage

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What did the leperchaun get at the bake sale? baked goods.

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What happened when the Neo-Nazi ran into a group of black people? He listened to their struggles, heard their stories, accepted their diversity and eventually hung up his hateful ways.

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What's the difference between a dead baby and a Ferrari? I don't have a Ferrari in my garage.

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What did one muffin in an oven say to another muffin? Nothing, muffins are inanimate objects thus incapable of sppech.

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A penis takes a trip to spain, he falls in love with an apple and proceeds to commit suicide

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What did the girl say to the boy? I don't know it was a private conversation

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How many surrealists does it take to change a light bulb? One, its not a difficult task.

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Why did the black man die? Kidney Failure.

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how do you make a plumber cry kill his family LOLOLOLOLOLOL

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Is it true that curiousity killed the cat? No, I hit it multiple times with a baseball bat

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I asked her where you were.

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A man runs into a bar. He is instantly knocked out.

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"Doctor, I seem to have a large horn-like growth protruding from my nose". "Well, yes, that is because you are a rhinoceros".

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Your mumma's so fat she is fat

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A man was walking along and got his legs shot off. He then proceeded to calm his wife and children and buy a wheelchair.

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What's the difference between a black guy and a wet towel? The towel doesn't kick when you hang it

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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