How do you get 100 babies into a bucket? A blender. How do you get them out? Tortilla chips.

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Why did the ceiling fall down? Because there weren't any walls.

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Did you know there was a black man in my family tree? He married my aunt.

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Why did the boy fall out of his tree house? the tree house was hit by lightning

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what did the cat say to the potato? meow

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Knock Knock. Who's there? Charles. Charles who? It's your brother Charles. I came straight here from the doctor. I was just diagnosed with stage 4 testicular cancer.

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Why was the asian a bad driver? Because while he was driving a leprechaun was punching him in the face.

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How many babies can fit in a dumpster? Let's not find out...

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What do you call a black man on a bicycle? A cyclist.

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Woah again Nero, you are so wise... I love you, I really do. If someone can and has already changed the world for the better, its you. No wonder people believe you have superhuman abilities, I used to think so too, but I think I understand what humans can do on another level now, you did that, thank you.

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Nero, please pick up the phone, I wont ever do that, it was a mistake okay? Stop that, my sister wont ever! My mom whatever! But if you lie a finger on my sister, I will kill you, I am at the outside, which room are you at? Tell me you coward fucker! Tell me!

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A duck walks into a bar and the bartender says"What do u want?" The ducks replays "EVERY DAY IM SHUFFLING!!!" The bartender slaps the duck in its face and quid his job. The bar has a hard time finding a replacement and his business dies. THE END

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Justin Beiber has fame, his own bodyguards, he has performed many shows and has everyone's attention. What do you have? A penis.

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What's comfy and easy to wear? Shorts.

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What's the difference between a pile of dead babies and a Lamborghini? I don't have a Lamborghini in my garage.

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Why couldn't the black man swim. Because he had never been taught.

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A man walks into a bar. He hasn't been there before, and it's a Friday so it's really crowded, and it's really quite a dive, so he and his girlfriend decide to leave and find somewhere else to eat.

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Whats big, red and will cause severe injuries possibly fatalities if it falls out a tree? A phone box

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Did you here about the guy who kidnapped Liam Neeson's daughter? Well, he died

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Q-What do you call a woman in the kitchen? A- A woman making me a damn sammich thats what.

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What's worse then failing a math test? Your mom getting shot

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Your mom is so fat, when she sat on a lump of coal she didn't realize she sat on a lump of coal.

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Jesus walks into a hotel, slams four nails down on the counter, and says, "Put me up for the night!" The concierge looks at him and says, "You're not Jesus. Jesus was brutally murdered approximately 1,970 years ago. And although I may not be a believer, his teachings have brought comfort and solace to millions of people around the world. Nor do we accept nails as payment. Please remove yourself from the premises or I will call security."

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A man walks in to a bar, what does he say? Ouch.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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