Your mother called last night. She wants her recipe back.

Roses are red Violets are blue I am adopted And so are you

So a mama tomato, a daddy tomato, and a baby tomato were all walking down the street. The baby tomato was falling behind its parents. So the daddy tomato goes back, squishes the baby tomato and yells ketchup!

Why did grandpa fall asleep naked on a bench? Because his mental condition is slowly deteriorating which is causing him to not be able to properly determine what is and isn't ok to do in public.

What's funnier than 24? 25

why did the plane crash because it was 9-11

What's worse than a rainy day? Rape.

How do you get a women stop running a marathon? You tell her that you have AIDS and she should get herself checked.

What did the child rapist say to the little boy? I'm going to rape you.

Jesus, Buddha and Mohamed walked into a bar and say: "There is as much validity in this fiction as in our collective works.

Q: What was Steve Jobs' last words before he died? A: I Think i might die.

What did the boy with asthma say to his friend I can't breath

Why didn't you return my call? Cause I F@%Kin Hate you!...And Just wanted to tell you in person....

What's worse than a gay joke? Their emotional repercussions, leading to a lack of self-esteem, which eventually drives the homosexual to commit suicide, leaving behind a now destroyed family.

Why could'nt the boy eat peanuts? Because if he did he would proceed to have an allergic reaction, his throat would swell up, he would go into analeptic shock and die.

Why were the teacher's eyes crossed? She got kicked in the face by a mule.

How many Santa Clauses does it take to change a light bulb? Santa Claus isn't real.

a black man, spanish man, and white man all fall off a building. and as they fall, i wonder: why are you laughing?

What's worst than finding two worms in your apple? Two holocausts.

Q: What did the Goth-Punk girl write on her test for the question "What are three kinds of rock?" A: Igneous, Sedimentary, & Metamorphic, She is a 4.0 Geology Major attending a respectable University. She simply chooses to express herself through the musical and clothing trends that emerged in 1970's English underground music. In reality it her personal preferences in the aforementioned areas have no bearing on her intellectual or academic standing.

What's worse than having to listen a song from Justin Bieber? Being wrongfully convicted of child molestation,rape and murder and spending 50 years in prison before being acquited by DNA-analysis.

Knock Knock! Who's there? I am.

69

Tried to type an ascii of a penis, failed

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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