What did the disabled boy get on Christmas morning? Cancer.

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Quick! It's a fly, call the swat team!!!

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What did the pirate say when his parrot died? Nothing. He was upset and didn't really feel like talking.

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Why did the goose cross the road? Because the chicken was on vacation

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I went to the bookstore to buy me a Where's Waldo book. I looked through the store and couldn't find it anywhere.... Well played waldo, well played.

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Whats the difference between a white man and a black man? Their skin color.

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What does Mitt Romney approve of flip flops? They feel good on his feet.

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Why did the girl fall off the swing? She had no arms. Why couldn't she get back up? She had no legs.

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Why did the plane crash? Because the pilot was a loaf of bread.

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why can't a blonde count to 70? cause 69 is a mouth full

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because he has an abusive farmer and needs to get away before it gets any worse.

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I forgot to tell you something I forgot wat it was

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What's the difference between Jews and pizza? One is an adherent to the religion of Judaism, and the other is a doughy bread topped with tomato sauce and cheese. They share virtually no similarities.

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Yep, super duper stressed, all of the time, but how did you know?

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What is the biggest lie of 2011? "I do"- Kim kardashian

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why did jim die? he had cancer why did jim have no hair? it started to fall out when he was 20 and now he is bald at 30 years old

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THAT MAN EATS TOO MUCH. therefore he is overweight.

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Ask me if I'm an orange? Are you an orange? No.

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Do you believe in magic? cuz i do.

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Burger King cashier: Are you on Team Jacob or Team Edward? Man: I'm on team I'm freaking hungry; now give me my food!

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~Chinese Anti Joke~ What is the difference between American army and Chinese army? American army teach youngsters to use their tanks. Chinese army smash youngsters with their tanks.

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a man walked up to me and said someone is dying with long terminal cancer i said who? man replies your cat. i replied i don't have a cat. man says whoops wrong person

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Where is my tractor?

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A jew walks into a bar and asked for 5 shots the bartender replies to him "did you and your wife have a fight" "yeah now shes atheist"

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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