What is big, red, and eats rocks? A big red rock-eater

thumb_up thumb_down +1

What is the result of a couples' feud? 96.

thumb_up thumb_down -13

Q: how do you stop a blonde woman from drowning? A: unplug the stopper in the bathtub Q: how do you stop a baby from drowning? A: take your foot off its head

thumb_up thumb_down +16

What do you call an Arab on an airplane? A passenger.

thumb_up thumb_down -21

what is the difference between a baby and a book... The book still has a spine

thumb_up thumb_down -10

A guy walks up to a girl and says: " hey can I have your number so can I have your text you later?" she says " no" he says " why ?" she says" guess" He says " look if you don't like me thats okay, " he gets up and walks away, turns out she doesn't have a cell phone, she was gonna give him her house number to call.

thumb_up thumb_down -17

Whats worse than finding a worm in your apple? Finding a snake in your liver. Because that could be hazardous to your health.

thumb_up thumb_down -11

What did the wife say to her husband when he arrived home from work? Nothing. She cried over his coffin. Her husband was a marine who died in a car bombing in Iraq.

thumb_up thumb_down +4

What do you call a black guy in a Walmart? A customer. You prejudice dullard!

thumb_up thumb_down +39

Q: A football coach walks into a bank. Why? A: Because one of his players is suffering from terminal cancer and he needs governmental funding for the team to play the big game against their rivals and to win, in hopes the kid will recover. Q: Why did the football coach go into the bank again? A: To receive more money to find a new running back.

thumb_up thumb_down +10

An Asian, a redneck, an Irish, and an Iranian walk into a bar. All but the Iranian were asked to go back to the parking lot and park their car to take up only one space.

thumb_up thumb_down -2

So Helen Keller walks into a bar...

thumb_up thumb_down -2

Q: What did the black man, the white man, the hispanic man, and the english man have in common? A: They all enjoyed broccoli.

thumb_up thumb_down +12

Want to hear a joke? Women's rights.

thumb_up thumb_down +27

A priest, a rabbi and a proctologist walk into a bar. Why is there a bar lying in the middle of the sidewalk?

thumb_up thumb_down +14

A paralyzed person walks into a bar.

thumb_up thumb_down +12

Why are Americans so fat? Poor diet and lack of exercise.

thumb_up thumb_down +2

Why did the man fall off his bike? He ran into a pile of dead babies.

thumb_up thumb_down +8

Why did the girl fall off the swing? She had no arms.

thumb_up thumb_down +15

How do you get a Hooker Wet? Dump her in a River.

thumb_up thumb_down +4

How many ears does Chuck Norris have? Two.

thumb_up thumb_down +8

What did the pillow say to it's owner? Nothing. Pillows are not able to talk.

thumb_up thumb_down +4

how do you know when you're a man? massive erection.

thumb_up thumb_down -5

What do you call a black kid with no parents? A black orphan.

thumb_up thumb_down -21

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops