What do you call a beagle and an eagle mixed together? A beagle.

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Why didn't the kid eat lunch at school? He wasn't hungry.

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Why did the midget fall from a tall building? Because somebody pushed him.

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Why doesn't Harry have any arms? Because he's a Jew.

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Why did the fat kid drop his Mcdonalds? Because he had a stroke.

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hey! did u just fall??? ..no..gravity wanted a hug.!

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What do a plane and a flight attendant have in common? They're both going somewhere in their careers. Aside from the flight attendant.

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whats worse than finding a holocaust in you apple...........

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What did the kid with no arms and legs get for Christmas? A: Cancer

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yomamas so fat it made Ben kanobi say thats no moon thats yo mama!

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Did you hear about the human cannonball who lost his job? Circus attendance is on the decline, as people are spending less money on entertainment, due to a slow economy and poor consumer confidence. Because the circus owners paid him under the table, he did not qualify for unemployment and was force to take a job at Hardies. He has a drinking problem and suffers from depression.

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Why did the man fall of the cliff? A: Because someone pushed him.

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Q)A man and a women are hiking on a mountain trail. A bear appears. What do they do? A) Die.

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A man was driving and texting at the same time and when he was not looking a car passed him on the other side of the road. The man driving the car that passed the man was talking on the phone. When the man txting looked up and look back and said thank god thats not me talking i could of crashed if i was him

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A man decided it was time to quit his job so he put his 2 weeks in and went to look for another job.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? It is not a sentient animal and is unaware of the dangers it will face.

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Knock Knock Who's There Trick or Treat!!!

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What is more funny than 8 babies in 1 bin? 1 baby in 8 bins.

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What did the farmer say when he lost his tractor? "I have a gambling problem."

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Why was the mushroom invited to the party? Because the party was a rave and some mushrooms are know to make the consumer of them hallucinate wildly.

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A duck walks into a bar and is quickly shooed away because it is unsanitary to have a duck in a bar.

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I was watching this one episode of mighty morphin' power rangers ......and i realized i got trapped in the 90's.... THANK YOU BOOTLEG TIME MACHINE FROM .....EBAY......it's always ebay.....

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RULES: #1) have fun #2) safety first

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An Englishman, a Frenchman, and a Viking are all fighting over a piece of land. The piece of land was the whole of England and this was the beginning of the Noman conquest in 1066.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops