Grandpa loved a good joke, he died laughing. The doctor said it was a severe stroke probably brought on by smoking aggravated by high cholesterol and high blood pressure.

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An Irishman walks out of a bar.

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Why did the boy drop his ice cream? Because it was a rather hot day and his attention was momentarily directed towards something else.

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Why did the girl fall over? She was poisoned for being the fairest one of all.

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A squirrel is about to steal the eggs of a sparrow when the sparrow suddenly says, "Stop! I will do anything if you would spare my eggs!" The squirrel has no capacity to reason and so steals the eggs anyway. The sparrow is devastated.

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At a feminist picnic there are no sandwiches.

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is the glass of milk half empty or half full it is scientifically proven that these are the same thing. Choosing one over the other is like saying that 1/2 does not equal 1-1/2. A normal person would just see this as an ordinary glass of milk.

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What has potential but is in fact disappointing? This joke.

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How many blondes does it take to replace a light bulb? Well, it depends if the person is blond or not. Also the person's age, as kids may not understand this proses at all.

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Why did the dog run away from home? Because the owner left the door open.

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What did one tree say to the other? "Hey Phil, how's it going?

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whats worse than ten dead babies in one trashcan? one dead baby in ten trashcans

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Why did the girl fall from the swing? She was laughing at an anti-joke.

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What do you call a black doctor? Doctor.

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What did the chicken say after crossing the road? Nothing.It's a f*cking chicken.

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knock knock whos there .. derp

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My girlfriend is getting an abortion tonight. Its a surprise.

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what is long and bare? polonaise to the pediatric ward what is short and bald? same polonaise, 3 weeks later

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How do you stop a dog from humping your leg? Pick it up and suck its dick.

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Why do giraffes have long necks? So they can reach higher, un-eaten leaves.

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What do u call 2 black people in the front of a car 3 in the back and 2 on top of the car going off a clif? A waste u can fit 2 more in the trunk

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hey i just F****d u and this is crazy so delete the number and keep the baby

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A jew was walking down the street what did he see? the holocaust

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Yo mama's so fat, she weighs 283 pounds.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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