Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? It was dead. Why did the second monkey fall out of the tree? It was stapled to the first monkey. Why did the third monkey fall out of the tree? Peer pressure.

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Why did the kid have no arms? A clown came and chopped them off.

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What does the composer Berg lack? Schoen.

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Why did the Koala fall out of the tree? Cause it was dead. Why did the second Koala fall off the tree? Cause it was also dead. Why did the third Koala fall off the tree? It thought the other two were playing a game. Why did the motorcyclist end up in the hospital? He was attacked by falling Koalas!

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A horse walks into a bar. The Bartender says "Why the long face?" The Bartender is then put into a lunatic asylum for hallucinating and trying to communicate with said hallucinations.

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What's 6 inches long and 2 inches wide and can drive a woman crazy? Money

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Why did the doctor commit suicide? His wife was recently killed in a car accident and simply could not take the emotional pain!

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Why did the kid drop his lollipop? He got hit by a bus.

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No.

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Why did the mormon walk into a bar? He didn't. Mormons don't drink.

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Three Jews walk into a bar... I lied, it was a gas chamber.

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Why is sally sad her parents abuse her daily

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A kid comes across an injured duck near a lake. Nevermind he doesn't see it he's really high.

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How full could a skeleton's stomach possibly be? Replete with perceptible emptiness.

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Q: Whats worst then losing your wallet? A: Giving birth to a dead baby.

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A black man enters a bar. The bartender approaches him, and asks "who will it be?" The black man pulls out a gun and robs the bar, he is then arrested ten days later.

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Passing by

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You are in a room with hitler and bin Ladin. You have a gun with 1 bullet. Who do shoot? Don't worry you don't have to make that decision. They are already both dead

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How do you get a baby to stop crying? Hit it with a brick.

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Why was the anti joke funny? because it wasn't funny.

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What does an emu an a kiwi have in common? Both are flightless birds endemic to there own countries.

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what do you call a animal with 3 horns. a triceratops

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The turd said crazy turd so many cows have ninety two ears and it walked away to the store and drank doors while juggling feces and racist jack-o-lanterns.

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Why did Jack take a prune out for the evening? A healthy snack as part of a balanced diet.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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