How many blondes does it take to change a lightbulb? Generally one, but as the situation varies so does the number.

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whats worst then being raped tortured and killed? it happening to 500000 puppies DX

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Why was the Muslim crying? Because his brother got hit by a bus.

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roses are red, voilets are creepy, i can beat you in call of duty

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Whats red and smells like blue paint? Red paint.

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A jew walks into an Oven....

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Knock, Knock Come in

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What did the Asian dad say to his son when he got an A- in math? Good job son.

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What do you tell someone who says they are contemplating suicide? where to find some cheap cyanide

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What did the pacific ocean do to the Atlantic ocean? He waved.

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Two colleague janitors sit next to each other in the coffee room, one says to the other: About yesterday... I checked three times and it looks pretty normal. Sorry... I wasn't around to hear the question the other posed the day before, but I heard it's supposed to be pretty funny with this answer. So... Less is better then none, right?

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In the weeks following the original release of Die Hard, reports sprung up across the nation of impressionable boys overdosing while masturbating.

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So I was making this glass of milk right? So I get the milk out. And I get the soup out.. then I go...wait a minute...where'd the glass of soup come into this glass of situations? *smile+awkard pause because nobody will laugh at this=Success of this anti joke...try it*

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Roses are Red Violets are Blue Holy guacamole Pineapples

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Q: What cat walks on two feet? A: Garfield Q: What mouse walks on two feet? A: Mickey Mouse Q: What duck walks on two feet? A: Donald Duck? A: No, all ducks you dipshit.

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What did the Rasta man say when he got his dread stuckin the toilet ?

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you know what is so funny hillary clinton!!!!!!

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What is brown and sticky? A stick

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people magazine

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Why did the girl die? She read Twililght

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As far as I know, the day after tomorrow is going to be YOUR lucky day, because you will be tasting sausage for the first time with your lower lips... No seriously, you cant be virgin, you can tell me the truth, you like 24 or something?

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do you listen to dubstep? OH YEA I LOVE SKRILLEX -_-

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a morman walks into a bar, he buys a 7up.

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Goku: KAAAAAAAAAAAAAMEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE Freezebox: HOLY SHI... Narrator: Will Goku ever finish his attack? Will Freezebox stand there like a fucking bitch afraid for the next 48 damn epiodes rather than take a step to the side? Will the "Zee" fighters ever do anything else but comment the trucking obvious and stop aborting the show with their sweat? Find out in the next episode of... Moral: DRAGONBULL ZHIT!

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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