What do you get when you come across a blonde. Depression, because you want to do her, but you know that will never happen cause you spend to much time sitting on your ass looking at anti-jokes.

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What did the hose say to the sprinkler? I'm gonna squirt you.

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Who has two thumbs and lost them? Me but I can't really point at myself due to the lack of thumbs.

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What is the difference between a firework and a dog? One is funny to blow up and the other one is pretty lights

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Q:What did the scissors say to the paper? A: Nothing, cause thier scissors and paper they don't talk..

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What is worse than burning your toast? - Obama

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"Knock Knock" "Who's There?" "Sara" "Come in, we will have a cup of coffee in the good company of each other."

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Yo mamma so fat that when she gets in bed she gets sleepy

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Why was the little boy sad? Cause his mum died of a terminal illness. Why was the little girl sad? Cause she was his sibling.

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Whats the difference between a kangaroo and a kangeroot ? Ones a marsupial. The others a Geordie stuck in a lift.

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joe diragi whacks off his dog

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Why didnt the kid go in the pool? Because there was no pool!!

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What's worse than a real joke on AntiJoke? The Holocaust

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why did the man fall off his bike? He got shot by the navy seals, He was a highly decorated terrorist.

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Your momma is so old, she has lived a wonderful, long life and witness a lot of human achievement.

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ewrg

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Q. How do you blindfold a Chinese man? A. With a blindfold.

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have u ever have to clean up ur own poop? me niether.

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Why were the police chasing the black man? Because he was in such a poor financial state that the bank foreclosed his house and now he has no source of income and therefore no way to purchase basic living requirements, so he was forced to steal in order to provide food for his family.

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how do you break up with your girlfriend? talk about their race.

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Why is 6 scared of 9? Because 9 is a zombie.

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how do u talk to a person you like go up and talk to them

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There was a blonde, a brunette, and a redhead. They were all of equal intelligence.

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whatts blue and fuzzy? Blue fuzz

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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