How do you confuse a Blondel? Tell her there's a demon in her liver

thumb_up thumb_down -8

Why did the boy eat his homework? Because he already ate his dog.

thumb_up thumb_down +47

How did the black guy survive the bus crash? At the time of the bus crash, it was a segregated community, therefore no black people were allowed on buses.

thumb_up thumb_down -13

Roses are Red Violets are Blue If you think this is gonna rhyme, You're dead wrong.

thumb_up thumb_down -1

What's the difference between a watermelon and a baby? One is fun to smash with a sledgehammer. The other is a baby.

thumb_up thumb_down +16

What happened when a Blonde girl and a Ginger man have sex without a condom? The woman gets pregnant and then after about nine months the woman gives birth and the child grows up, when the child is adolescent it is able to reproduce and the process continues again.

thumb_up thumb_down -18

A deaf man walks into a bar. Minutes later, cops come in and arrests the poor man for not paying his bill while the deaf man sits at the bar calmly drinks his beer.

thumb_up thumb_down -3

THIS ONE IS MIIINE THIS ONE IS MIIINE I AM TOTALLY TIFA I AM TOTALLY TIFA! This one apparently.

thumb_up thumb_down +23

Q: Why do homeless people smell bad? A: Because they live on the street and they dont take showers it's very sad sometimes.

thumb_up thumb_down -14

What did the boy say to his father? I don't know. With the seemingly infinite number of topics that two people could discuss and the fact that both the father and son are fictional, it would be unreasonable and border edge mentally unstable for me to assume that you would know what they may or may not be talking about.

thumb_up thumb_down -19

Why did the Triceratops walk into a grocery store? To buy groceries

thumb_up thumb_down +9

One night, a man was bitten by Dracula. The first thing to come out of his mouth was "Joke's on you, I have AIDS!" Then proceeded to laugh hysterically until Dracula snapped his neck

thumb_up thumb_down -7

A boy asks his teacher for a eraser....he was given a blue pen. Turns out he was in space.

thumb_up thumb_down -23

yo mamas so old she probably ralises the greater risk of breast cancer in middle age women.

thumb_up thumb_down +4

A guy walks up to a girl and says: " hey can I have your number so can I have your text you later?" she says " no" he says " why ?" she says" guess" He says " look if you don't like me thats okay, " he gets up and walks away, turns out she doesn't have a cell phone, she was gonna give him her house number to call.

thumb_up thumb_down -45

What did the little girl with cancer get for Christmas? Nothing, she didn't make it that far

thumb_up thumb_down -21

"You've got a lot of C in your body." said the doctor. Jimmy replied with glee: "Ah that's great news, vitamin C is.." "No you've got Hepatitis C, you'll be dead within a month."

thumb_up thumb_down +41

Are tomatoes more scary than onions? No. They are not more scary than onions.

thumb_up thumb_down -11

A man walks into a bar. The bartender asks, "Why the long face?" The man replies, "I was born with an extra chromosome."

thumb_up thumb_down +23

Your momma's so ugly she adopted you because she had a problem attracting men.

thumb_up thumb_down -10

Why was rebecca crying? Because her mum had just died in a house fire!!!

thumb_up thumb_down -17

Roses are red, violets are blue, I told you she was my Mom, but that didn't stop you!

thumb_up thumb_down +8

Black people stink of shite!

thumb_up thumb_down -26

Roses are, blue, Violets are red, Screw poetic forms, I wish you were dead

thumb_up thumb_down +2

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops