why does the room smell bad? because there's a dead body under the bed

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Get a life besides thumbing down statements telling you advice.........

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You the same as before? I am being a bit overly cautious I admit that, I would call you, the problem is that while you are either pretty good at pretending to be innocent and all, or actually pretty down to earth, I mean I would probably applaud you for tricking me into believing you are pretty sweet before, but I got my wife and her family to take care off now, its not quite the same getting stabbed in the back anymore,

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Knock knock. Who's there? Boo Boo who? I don't have a last name, it's just Boo

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Why did Cody sit in the corner? Because his daddy didn't love him. #DaddyDoesn'tLoveYouAnymoreChair

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Why are Asians so smart? Because they study

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What is your view on school violence? I'm all for it.

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What weights more than a 300 pound man? A 400 pound man.

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Your mamma's so fat she has been called morbitally obese

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whats a joke

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A zebra was on his way to a water hole. On the way he met 6 giraffes. Each giraffes had 3 monkeys around their neck. Each monkey had 2 birds on their head. How many animals went to the water hole? A:One, the zebra.

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Why did Anti-Joke.com close down? It didn't. If your reading this, the site is fully operational and up to date with your system.

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What did the girl with no arms or legs get for Christmas? A bicycle.

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Why do vampires drink blood? Maybe if they existed you could ask one.

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See now, that is because you consider yourself my submissive on a both concious and subconcious level, your body and mind wants me to take care of you. I could say it is because I read minds, but why read minds, when I can create them, why read the future, when you can create it. Finally, lets take a look into the word, nerve endings yes? Not nerve endings baby, its called Suggestion. But seriously though, lets put the word nerve endings on top of the word suggestions again there. Nerve endings, did I mention it works on your butt too? You see, usually you would say no, but you do know that now that I am your master, you do and enjoy as I say? See you baby. Moral: "Feel the grove, I control the way you move"

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Comedian: Do you all wanna hear a joke? Audience: Yeah!!! Comedian: Okay! What did the bad comedian say to the audience? Audience: What?!! Comedian: Chicken butt. Thank you, you've been a great crowd. Good night!

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What's long, hard and full of seamen? A submarine.

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Why was Hitler a bad person? He killed himself.

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What's the same about a duck-billed platypus and a duck? They both have a duck bill on their face... Duh!

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Yo momma's so fat, she had a heart attack and is currently hospitalized.

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What did the college student say after he failed his test? He didn't say anything, he was a mute.

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Q. Why did the girl with no legs fall off her bike? A. Somebody threw a refrigerator at her.

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What's the difference between a cow and some dirt? They're the same except for almost everything

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Roses are Red, Violets are Blue I have a gun BANG!

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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