you were so loud you woke helen keller up!!!!!!!

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. Two muffins are sitting next to each other in the dessert. A hungry man passes, takes a look at the muffins lifts his shoulders and walks away. The next day a camel walks by and eats one of the muffins. The camel dies instantly, apparently the muffin was poisoned.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? The chicken crossed the road accidentaly as chickens are absent minded.

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Why did the cop not arrest the driver? The Driver shot him 2 minutes earlier.

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Roses are red violets are blue i have aids and now so do you

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What happens when you choke a smurf? Nothing, smurfs aren't real.

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One day there was 3 bears, a papa bear, a mama bear, and a baby bear. They were out swimming when suddenly a girl comes over to their house and tries to sit down. She sits on the big chair and says "too big", then she sits on the little chair and says "too small" and then sits on the medium chair and says "just right". Suddenly, the bears come back. Papa bear: "somebody has been sitting on my chair!" Baby bear "somebody has been sitting on my chair too!" Mama bear "somebody has been sitting on my chair, and she still here!" The girl says "Hi my name is Goldilocks." After about few minutes introducing each other, they ate dinner and they all had a great time.

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Patient: Doctor, I was cleaning my glass eye and accidentally swallowed it. Doctor: OK. Lean over and spread your legs. Patient: (Leans over and spreads his legs). Doctor: My God! This is the first time, in all my years of practice, that I've ever seen an asshole looking back at me

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roses are red violets are blue i have a penis get in the bed

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What do you call an Iraqi man steering the plane? a pilot, you racist.

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In soviet Russia... there is a distinct probability that you will get mugged due to the high crime rate and gang ruled streets.

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What rhymes with popscicle and weighs at least 300 pounds? Your mom. I lied about the popsicle.

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Guy 1: That's what she said! HAHAHA!!! Guy 2: That's what who said? Guy 1: I don't know. :/

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A black man, a Mexican man and a white man walk into a bank. The black man reaches into his bag and pulls out his bank card, the Mexican and the the white man do the same as they need to withdraw money.

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Robin get in the batmobile!

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I saw my friend stabbing a girl. i asked what is he doing "Oh im just killing time" turns out the girls name is Time Demson. What a weird name i thought to myself.

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why is 6 afraid of 7?? because 7 8 9

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the joke below will not be as funny as this one.... hahaha other joke i just ruined you

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What do you call a man with no arms and no legs in a pool? An ambulance.

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Wanna hear something funny? Sure. Okay,cool

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Want to hear a scary story?' I was droppin a two ball and the monster walked in

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eh dylan quieres que te trolle de nuevo

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Why did the blonde fall off of the swing? Because someone threw a machete and it made contact with her skull, thus causing a painful break and rapid blood loss, making it virtually impossible to remain sitting upright.

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Roses are red violets are blue most poems rhyme but this one doesnt.,

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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