A chicken , a dog and a horse walked into a bar. There were going to the vets but were confused.

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Why did suzy fall of the swing? -she had no arms... Why couldn't she get back up? -she had no friends

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How much does a polar bear weigh? about 900 pounds

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What is Jetlag? When your computer is running too many applications in the background while you're trying to play a game of Jetman so it starts lagging.

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hi anti joke

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What did the man say to the cat? Nothing. He doesn't have a cat.

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A man on a plane convened his stupid flyer that instead of who in knock-knock jokes it what were, he thought it would funny. Later it really paid off, as they fly very close over water he says "knock knock" "whose there" " Captain Neverlands" "Captain Neverlands wh-...were" "Captain Neverlands IN WATER YOU DUMMY!!!!"

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Where would you find a dog with one leg? Possibly in a vet's surgery, or in an animal rescue home or being cared for by a loving owner.

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A horse walked into a bar. Several people got up and left as they spotted the potential danger in the situation.

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Where did Wendy decide to work for her part time job? TACO BELL

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why did the mexican cross the road to get to the other country

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What did the boy do when he was cold? He got a blanket.

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Whats worse than finding a worm in your apple? Getting raped by a giant scorpian. Whats worse than getting raped by a giant scorpian? Getting tortured to death. Whats worse than being tortured to death? Getting raped by a giant scorpian, and getting tortured to death. Whats worse than that? Getting raped by a giant scorpian, getting tortured to death, and finding a worm in your apple.

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Why did the skeleton not go to the party? Because without the aid of various ligaments and muscles that would be attached to the average human being's skeleton, he was not able to move himself so much as an inch.

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Why don't blind people skydive? They do.

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There once was an Asian kid who got a B+ in Math. He was later yelled at and beat by his parents.

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? Because it was dead. Why did the other monkey fall out of the tree? Because it was stapled to the first. Why did the third monkey fall out of the tree? Because he thought it was a game.

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Your momma so fat, she's fat

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Ask me if I am a truck. Are you a truck? No.

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My life has been getting worse and worse since I developed cancer.

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What did the boy with no arms and no legs get for christmas? A bike

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What do you call a black man fishing. ... a fisherman racist.

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When life gives you aids, make aids-aid.

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Roses are brown, violets are brown, who is s***ing in my garden?

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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