What would people call Michael Jackson if he became president? Probably President Jackson

Harold Camping and the May 21st 2011 rapture.....

Chuck Norris has a chin under his beard.

Why was the strict Asian father angry when his son got an A- on his test? He found out that his son had been cheating.

How many kids with ADHD does it take to change a lightbulb? Let's go play on our bikes.

How do you make a plumber cry? You kill his family.

What's worse than scraping your knee? Getting raped mercilessly by Ronald McDonald.

knock knock whos there? your mother your mother who? ...........what?

a man walks into a bar. ouch.

Q:how many ping-pong balls do you need te get a crocodile off of a slide ? A:none, because an engine doesn't have doors

Okay so there was a turtle, a pig, and a donkey. They were out fishing when suddenly they spot a man in boat. The man said he hasn't eaten in 5 days and he is very hungry. He looked at the turtle and said "no, too much shell." The turtle was happy and left. He looked at the pig and said "no, too much fat." The pig ran away and was very happy. He looked at the donkey and said "I think I'll have donkey today." The donkey ran away because he was scared. The man died from hunger.

Why did the U.S.A. vote in a black president? Because racial prejudice is a thing of the past and the U.S.A. is a liberal and progressive nation.

I pregnant woman wakes in the night because she had a mis-carriage.

How do you make a 4 year old cry? You tell him all his family died in a horrible plane crash.

Why couldn't little Jimmy play catch with his dad? Because he was an orphan.

Ask me any question. Okay, what is your favorite color? I refuse to answer.

what did hayley say to missy last night? I'm tired bye

Yo momma so fat she went on the Subway diet and is now exercising regularly to lose weight.

what did hitler say before he turned on the gas who are you calling a dick dina

2 gay men walked into a bar, The next day they want back to the bar, They went back on the third day but only 1 man came back out and he was in tears, This was because the other man had a cardiac arrest and died.

Which came first, the chicken or the egg? The Big Bang. -BG_Shank_A

if you press the thumbs up button nyan cat is going to visit you tonight

what's brown and sticky? A stick.

Technically rainbows are white.....and have gold at the end.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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