Did you know Helen Keller had a playground in her backyard? Neither did she

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"Everyone be very quite. Dont say a word or well get eaten by the big, fat stupid ugly fat faced dinosaur in that cave over there." "A word or well get eaten by the big fat stupid ugly fat faced dinosaur in that cave over there." "Look how clever Charles is now were all screwed."

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Why can cats jump so high? Cats leg muscles are different then ours. They work kind of like springs that build up energy and then release suddenly. Its kind of like a budgie cord. This gives them the ability to jump so high. If humans were built the same way, they could easily jump up on a one-story roof.

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What did the catholic priest say at the AA meeting? Alcohol is ruining my life.

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Hey I just met you, and this is crazy! But iI'm on bath salts and your face looks tasty!

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How many pancakes does it take to build a doghouse? Pancakes are not a feasible material with which to build a doghouse.

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What is the difference between two little red cubes who are excactly the same in weight lengt colour etc. ??? One is actually a blue ball!

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If a black person gets a tan, what do you get? A burned black sausage.

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Why did Zayne have no friends? Because he is retarded.

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What did the girl with two broken legs give her parents for Christmas? Medical bills.

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Why is this site so stupid? It's no, its the best site ever

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What's the difference between an orange? The horse because the vest has no sleeves.

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A police officer asks a witness of a murder what he witnessed. The man replies "A murder"

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a one fingered leper was sitting one day on the beach playing cards. When a stranger asked to play,hide and go seak. well the oner finger leper licked his invisible finger and said "which ways the winds blowing pete. .-poot-

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Q: what's your dog's name ? A: Dog.

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Whats worse than biting into an apple and finding out you ate half a worm? Getting raped. Whats worse than that? Getting shot in the liver. Whats worse than that? Getting shot in the liver then getting raped.

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Why couldn't John ride a bicycle? Because he is a fish.

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Why can't Helen Keller drive? Because she's dead.

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Why was it so hard for teachers to teach Tommy? Tommy is brain dead

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So a guy walks into a bar and says, "I can hold a spoon in between my butt-cheeks." Jillian Michaels asked him if that will help him lose weight.

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do you have snow in your vagina? because i am going to plow you

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What do you call a black guy driving a plane? A pilot.

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A man and his family walk into a talent agent's office. The man proceeds to sexually accost his wife and children. The agent calls security who escort the family out and helps the wife find a domestic violence shelter to stay at.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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