Why didn't the skeleton cross the road? He lacked the required muscular, integumentary, and nervous systems required to do so (among other essential bodily systems).

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Three men are walking, the first one walks into a bar. He has a couple of drinks because he is depressed. He drives home, drunk, and dies in a car accident. His wife finds out and hangs herself.

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What do you call a New Zealander with 1000 lovers? A shepard

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What's the difference between Tiger Woods and a rock? The rock doesn't cheat on it's wife.

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roses are red violets are blue my poems mite be ugly and so are u

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Why did the black man commit suicide? Because he was killed by a white cop.

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YOU

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Once upon a time there was beautiful princess, ONCE!

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What did the bar say to the man? Nothing, bars can't talk

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Colin is gay but toasters are not

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What happened when barba opened the coca cola? The cap flew off and hit the fence then the train then the moon then the pillow then the sun then the pole and the pole fell and hit the baseball and the cap landed on the floor... Then my turtle died

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Why did Suzie fall off the swing? She had no arms. Why couldnt she get up? She had no legs. Knock Knock. Whos There? Not Suzie

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How did the comedian end his show with a bang? He shot 4 people in the audience. It was a horrible sight and the remainder of the people in the audience were scarred for life.

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Roses Are Red, Violets Are Blue, I Have 5 Fingers The Middle One's For You!! :D

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No really, try this: You: Say "knock, knock" Your friend: OK, knock knock You: Who's there? Your friend: ...... [this awkward pause makes evident the fact that it has now dawned on your friend that he has to generate content for a joke that he wasn't telling in the first place]

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Why did the little girl pull her hair out? She didn't, It's a side-effect of the chemotherapy.

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What did the crippled Nazi say to the Jew? Get in the train.

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Roses are Red, Violets are Blue. Vodka is cheaper than dinner for two.

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What's worse than finding a Worm in your Apple? being Mauled to death.

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What's the difference between black and white people? One is black.

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What do you call a lump on your penis? STD

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So, a giraffe walks into a bar and orders six martinis and shame on for wanting a punch line this giraffe needs help.

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what did the man say to the other man he bumped into? sorry. and they never saw eachother again

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How do you kill the circus? You chop it's head off.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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