Roses are Red, I have a phone, Nobody texts me, Forever alone.

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Whats worse than 1 bee sting? - 2 Whats worse than 2 bee stings? - Holocaust Whats worse than the Holocaust? - 3 bee stings Now, if you are smart, you would notice that no one really alive today was in the Holocaust, therefore you can not make an accurate comparison between bee stings and the millions of Jews being killed. -SPG

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What's worse than the Holocaust? ........finding a worm in your apple.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because Henry threw it well.

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How much does a polar bear weigh? Enough to take three harpoons to the chest and still manage to feast on a family of baby seals...... Hi my name is Joey

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How do you kill a dwarf? You put rope around his neck and attach the other end to a concrete slab. Proceed to then through him in the ocean.

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Knock knock Who's there The mailman The mailman who? You are so dumb.

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how did the chicken cross the road. it didnt.

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Ask me if I'm an orange? Are you an orange? No.

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What did the Japanese man do to the pizza? He ate it.

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Why did the boy drop his ice cream? Because he had no arms.

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What happens when you ask a blind guy to drive you somewhere? What happens if you ask a blind guy to drive? You will end up in a four way accident with 8 people dead 2 of which children and 1 baby. You might survive but the blind guy won't so you will have to go to court for him on the issue. You realize that you are terrible when it comes to the law and you get yourself thrown in jail for 2 years. When you get out you are so tired of getting butt raped that you go out and do it to someone else. Then you go back to jail an the process repeats it's self because this is the American justice system. We could work on it a little bit. But yeah, don't ask a blind guy to drive, your butt will thank you.

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What did the kid with no arms and legs get for Christmas? A: Cancer

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What do you call a fridge? Dorothy.

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One day a terribly epileptic child is put on on a strict Atkins diet by his loving mother. A week later he finds that the frequency and intensity of his seizures have been reduced by its ketogenic effects, which provides exogenous fats for the body to burn, but limits the available carbohydrate so that ketone bodies build up. It is the high level of these ketones which appear to suppress seizures.

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What do you call a black guy selling drugs? A pharmacist.

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What do you call a dog with no legs? It doesn't matter because he won't come anyways.

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A black man is running down the street with a purse in his hand. He was trying to catch up to the old woman who forgot it at the restaurant. She was very grateful.

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What's black and can't speak? A garbage can.

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why can't dead peaple have sex? because they're dead.

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What do an elephant and a grape have in common? They're both purple... except for the elephant.

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Knock knock Who's there? Hurry up, let me in! Hurry up, let me in, who? *gunshot*

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I like my coffee like i like my woman.... with big titis.

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Knock Knock Who's there? The police. Your husband died.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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