What do you call a hickey on your shoulder? Bad aim -Cooper Simpson

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NEVER

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roses are violets red is blue i like doughnuts doughnuts are good

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Penis-biter

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Why was Lucile crying? Because she was sad.

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whats my name? Matt

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knock knock. who's there? Alticka Alticka who? Alticka pudding cup.

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how do you make a dog roll over you kill it

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because it was being shipped to KFC.

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knock knock! fu ck off i'm a shift worker trying to sleep

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whats the difference between you're mom and you're dad none there both the same

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Your Mother is so stupid that not only can she not peform basic mathematical sums, but she frequantly makes spelling errors

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What did the African-American get for Christmas? Nothing. I did mention he was African-American, right?

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What is white and will kill you if it fell out of a tree? Charles Manson

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what's the difference between a lamborghini and you're mother. cars don't scream when you rape them

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Two pretzels were walking down an alley way, one was assaulted. In a instinctive move, the other quickly ran away and alerted the authorities. The assaulted pretzel was severely injured but slowly recovered covered from physical trauma and has now sought professional help to deal with it's great deal of post traumatic stress.

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A man walks into a bar the bartender looks at the man and says "Hey son you wanna make one hundred bucks?" the man looks at the bartender and says "Im not your son."

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What do you get when you kill justin beiber? A medal..

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what do you get when you come across a old dog with herpes, a fat man with herpes and an apple? you get nothing but the satisfaction of seeing such a horrific sight

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Why did the man drop his glasses? His hand was sweaty.

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What do you call a giggling penguin? Personification.

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What did the white man do when he got a black eye? He returned it to the crazed gentleman who sent it to him.

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How do you make your mom mad? Burn down the house and eat the dog.

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Lasers are red, Tasers are blue, and I will use them, to kill you!

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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