What did one narwhal say to another Hi ;)

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Obama

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Why does my girlfriend pee standing up? Because he is a man.

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Want to hear a joke about Potassium? So do I.

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Why did Helen Keller's dog run away? You would too if your name was Gnrwhaf

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Where do 5 gay guys go????? One Direction.

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TOYS TOYS TOYS IN THE ATTIC

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A panda walks into a restaurant, sits down and orders a sandwich. After he finishes eating the sandwich, the panda pulls out a gun and shoots the waiter, and then stands up to go. "Hey!" shouts the manager. "Where are you going? You just shot my waiter and you didn't pay for your sandwich!" The panda yells back at the manager, "Hey man, I am a PANDA! Look it up!" The manager's heart skipped a beat, and he locked himself inside his office, trembling with fear and confusion. Yes, it was plausible that a beast such as that could point to a random entry on the menu, and it was physically possible for it to pull the trigger of the gun (and, at such close proximity to the waiter, it would be pretty hard to miss him), but it was shocking and altogether disturbing to hear such an animal speak in human language, much less vernacular English.

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What did the guy say when he found out his girlfriend had a dick I don't think we should date anymore, you have a dick.

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What's good? Anything that is not bad.

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why does column have a letter n?

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A dyslexic man walks into a bra.

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What do you call a depressed nerd who plays WoW. Me....

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Two homeless men are baking in an oven. They scream loudly until they both die.

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Why did Billy drop his ice cream?? He got hit by a truck.

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A jew, a catholic, and a muslim walk into a bar. Within minutes, they begin to argue about religion. After a few hours of intense debate, all three left dissatisfied and upset.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? The bold and unpredictable female bird escaped under the horror of the fearful fence of which enclosed the innocent chickens. As she wandered towards the nearby city of magic and dreams she approached by a large, empty road. A mysterious, shining object in the distant caught her eye. As she slowly to a shivering step towards the intereging sparkle, she was ran over by a car. EPIC FAIL LOL!!!!

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Black people are ugly. They should not live in this world. They are apes. They should live as apes not humans. Why do they have ugly curly hair, fat lips, and a big flat nose? SO UGLY!! EWW

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Where do you go when you die? Nowhere

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The Aristocrats

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hi little boy you want some candy i dont know do you want some candy you creeper

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why was the kid named owen? Because thats what his parents wnted him to be named

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i am writing this because i felt like it.

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What is the difference between ashes and a jew? A lot

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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