what did batman say to robin before getting into the car? get in the car.

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How much wood would a wood chuck chuck if a wood chuck could chuck wood? The woodchuck's ability to chuck has been left indeterminable. Therefore until the wood chuck's prowess in wood chucking is brought to light we must leave it a variable. Using the coefficient (L) to represent wood that can possibly be chucked. Then using (C) to represent the life cycle of said wood chuck chucking. We are also assuming this woodchuck will remain vigilante and not require food or sleep for the entire duration of chucking ultimately lowering is maximum chucking output. From this we can determine the W.C.P.S. (wood chucks per second). Finally subtract the remaining wood (RW) from the chucked total and we have rendered that : L(W.C.P.S) - (C -RM/t) = X

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No, I had no idea, nor did I know that Nero means Black or Darkness until I searched it up some weeks ago. No, I would never photoshop anything, I mean sure I am the girl/woman thing with the big tits, but that`s like all I got going... Oh and yeah I use glasses sometimes because these contact lenses become itchy after a while and stuff.

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What's the difference between a park bench and a black man? The bench can support a family!

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What's worse than biting into a worm and finding an apple? Why would you bite into a worm?

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A horse walked into a bar. Several people got up and left as they spotted the potential danger in the situation.

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How did the mouse die It was eaten by a cat How did the cat die It jumped into the bathtub and drowned

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What's worse than the holocaust? Another holocaust.

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What does a turkey do? I don't know I'm not a turkey

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Roses are red Violets are blue I have down syndrome duh dusfy druah

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whats brown and has a head? A: my penis

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What did the banana say to the peach? Dude, we can talk?

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What did god say when he made the first african american? "I got about 3 more humans to go and about 400,000,000 more insects and plants"..

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What do you get when you cross 3 men and a chainsaw? Answer: 2 and a half men

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What happened to the blonde who blew out her birthday candles? Her hair caught on fire

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>>---------------------------------[ knee ]------------------------->>>

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If I have 12 backpacks and Jimmy has 91 pancakes, then how many marshmallows can cover the roof of this building? Purple. Because Aliens don't wear hats.

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What did the pet lion say to its owner? Nothing. The lion then proceeded to hunt down its owner, pin him down and rip out his insides. Besides, the likelyhood of owning a lion as a pet is very slim, and even if one did, this act would be highly illegal in most parts of the world.

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How do you make a tissue dance? You really can't, but you could grab it and shake it around so it looks like its dancing.

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What do you call people who play dance dance revolution? Dancers

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Doctor Doctor, I feel like a pair of curtains! Really? Well that's the least of your problems. Your test came up HIV positive.

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What's the difference between a zombie, a vampire and a werewolf? One is a zombie, one is a vampire and one is a werewolf.

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I wanted to burn alot of calories so i found a fat kid and set him on fire. :3

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Why did the world not end in 2012? Because the Mayans were drunks.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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