Some guy pretends to be Santa on the street. He touches a little girl and says "It's okay i'm Santa" So the pedophile Santa molestes the little girl. The little girl goes home and says that Santa touched her so the parents go looking for this guy. And then they find out he died of a heart attack.

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When Michael Jackson was making his last son, he named him Blanket... he was cold.

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What do you call a black man with a small penis? Aids free

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what is bad about being a black jew? you have to sit in the back of the oven

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Q: Did you hear the joke about the deaf kid? A: Neither did he.

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Gawds Trololols: Jewsus: I die for ur Sins, now u are free! *argh* Gawd AD 3000: TIME TO DIE SINNERS! Jewsus: But I paid for humanity`s sins and am stuck in hell because of this and... Gawd: Meh just didnt really liek you TROLOLOL! Gawds Trololols 2 directors clit: Gawd: Jebus! (the third) I want you to trololol peeps now! GO! Jebus: As you see people, I have died for you in order to prove that I am immortal! Peeps: Uh, wow? Jebus: TROLOLOL! So dad, when am I gonna get back to earth again, I kinda promised my boyfriends/apostles that there would be a second cumming as you told me to do, and people have been waiting for over twothousand and fourtee... Gawd: Never! Trolololol! Moral: "Would you trust a being whose veins are loaded with alcohol?" Jesus 2: The second coming: In cincemas never!

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hi im tom. whats your name? joe. hi im tom. whats your name? joe... tom has short term memory loss.

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Yo momma is so stupid, she has no job, five kids, and six weeks to live, due to the fact she spent all her money on cigarettes and now has lung cancer.

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Why was the boy afraid of the dark? he was blind

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how do you confuse a blonde? tap her on both shoulders

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Why can't kids do drugs in school? Because it's against the rules.

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Q: What Jews are doing in Palestine? A: Living.

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What happens if George Washington is still alive? World population increases by 1

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What's the best way to eat 20 pancakes in ten minutes? With a fork

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what is the difference between joe diragi and jerry sandusky sabdusky only targets human little boys

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One, two, three, four and five

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What kind of fire alarm does a zebra not like? One that doesn't work

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What do you call 12 ghosts? A bus accident.

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what do you do if you catch syphilis from a Swedish prostitute? seek the help of a medical professional.

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Whats worse than ten babies stapled to a tree? One baby stapled to ten trees.

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Joke.

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How many electricians does it take to screw in a lightbulb? One.

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Yo Momma so fat, that she need the atlantic to take a bath!

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A snail buys a car from a dealership, and then asks the manager if he could paint a large S on the side of the car. The manager agrees, and the snail drives away. From the parking lot, the manager sees the car go straight on to the highway and get hit by a truck. Unfortunately, snails cannot drive.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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