A guy walks into a bar. The bartneder says, "Wow, buddy, you look awful. What's wrong?" The guy responds, "My life is a joke."

Why did the chicken cross the road? To warn people on the other side that the sky was falling Why did the cow cross the road? Cause he had madcow disease Why did Chuck Norris cross the road? Cause he's Chuck Norris Why did the Mexican cross the road? He was on his way to America Why did the black man cross the road? He was just running to his car you racist.....after he had robbed the bank Why did the horse go to the other side of the field? He liked green grass

What would Walt Disney do if he were alive today? Gurgle and choke inside his cryogenic vault as liquid nitrogen flooded into his lungs.

Halo < COD

If you have a large penis.give this joke a thumbs up. ( :

Have you seen Stevie Wonder's new house? No Neither has Stevie

Why doesn't Santa come in the summer? Because it's not Christmas.

What happened when the man turned on his TV? It was tuned to the Discovery Channel

What is blue and smells like the sea The ocean

Roses are red Grass is greener I think of you when I play with my weiner

Knock Knock there's a doorbell

What happen's when you give an alcoholic whiskey? He's an alcoholic, so he drinks it.

I have tuberculosis because Ebola is too mainstream.

Why did the boy rip out all of his hair? He was insane.

Q: What do you call a blonde, a brunette, and a red head all who are 16 years old and standing in a school? A: High School Students

a drumset fell off a clif. Badoom ch.

what do you get when you cross a jellyfish, a jar, and a brown crayon? i dont know, im not into genetics, and jars dont have genes.

Friends are a lot like trees... ...they fall down when you hit them multiple times with an axe.

Why did the chicken cross the road? To get away from the farmer that was trying to kill it.

That awkward momment when there is no Candy in the Van... <3

One dog says to the other "I love going for walks!" A women over-hears, screams "A Talking Dog!", and calls the police. The dog is put down and dissected for scientific research.

Your momma's so fat that when she uses a hoolahoop, she gets tired after one try and has to stop.

What do you call a large group of Chinese people on Mars? An extraordinary feat for the Chinese space program and a historic day in human history, where a particular country has set up the first human colony on another planet and we have proven to ourselves that our race is capable of interplanetary travel and can accomplish anything if we set our minds to it.

What's big, hard, in the water, and isolated? Shutter Island

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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