A priest, a jew, and a pirate walk into a bar. An exchange of dialogue occurs with the bartender and hilarity ensues.

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::ring::ring::ring:: Hello? Is your refrigerator running? Yes, yes it does! Why? I work for a local home appliance superstore and we are having a special on repairs and maintenance. Would you like to try our home appliance maintenance offer? I'm sorry no! I do not actually have a refrigerator. I only have a cooler. Bye! ::the man shuts off his cell phone and sets it on top of his styro-foam cooler as he mumbles to himself alone while on his boat, "Darn advertisement offers!" and continues to fish in the middle of the lake::

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There were two muffins in an oven one muffin said, "Is it hot in here or is it just me?" the other muffin said, "AHHH A TALKING MUFFIN!"

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Your mama is so white she helped pay for your education because she wants you to have the best opportunities in life.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Who let out the chicken?!?

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What do boats and starving children have in common? They both float, except for the starving children.

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What do you call three mexicans in a bowl of soup? Whatever their respective names might happen to be.

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A man walks in to a bar, Has a drink, and leaves.

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why did the chicken cross the road. to get to the other side. but it didnt. ROADKILL

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Wumbo

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women outside of the kitchen

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Whats worse than finding a worm in your Apple? Finding an apple in your worm

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Why'd Sally fall of the swing? Sally's a fish.

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What do you call a police woman who shaves her pubes? PC Marion Jones

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suck my a s s i hate mother f u c k e r s in my mother f u c k i n g crib

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Knock knock Who's there? I'm the Dick I'm the dick who? I'm the Dick Cheney

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What's hard, long and full of seamen? an erect penis.

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How do you make a sandwich? Go into the kitchen and make a sandwich.

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How long does it take to microwave a baby? I don't know, I was to busy masterbating. GBW

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Yo mama so ugly... she has an extremely bad burn on her face.

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Girl, why are you crying? I'm not a girl, I'm a strawberry.

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What did the pauper want for Christmas? Money

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Josh is sooo great at blowing, xoxo Dylan Hodge.

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Everyone is different, but there are two of me, therefore I am unique. I have 72 different personalities, which all think, act and behave the same, all have my same name, but its still different to have such a thing eh? No I am not asking, I just added that weird little lightbulb symbol after "eh". People buy my book, its full of this nonsense... Its named "Are you left winged, or wrong winged" The book that has nothing to do with politics, and everything to do with politicians non existent sexlife! (seriously I had a book signing today... It was weird, people like stood in line twenty Signatures... AND PEOPLE ARE ALL GOING "HEY ARE YOU THAT GUY FROM HORSEHEAD?" Nero -WHO THE FUCK! IS THAT GUY ON HORSEHEAD?

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops