That moment when you try and finger your girlfriend and there no hole......and you start questioning your sexuality

thumb_up thumb_down -5

Q: Playstation 4 or Xbox One? A: Both of them are specialized desktop computers used to play video games. It makes no sense to argue or attempt to make any distinction, as they are the exact same thing.

thumb_up thumb_down +10

What did the doctor say to the man with cancer? You have cancer.

thumb_up thumb_down -13

What did the boy with no arms get for christmas? heart worms

thumb_up thumb_down +22

Roses are read Vilots are blue, I have a gun, Now get out of my house!!!

thumb_up thumb_down -12

if any1 wants contact with me, nina, call me on my cell at 879-555-0934 im looking for a short, chubby man with a hungering taste of mexican taste

thumb_up thumb_down -24

why don't asians use this finger (point at pinky)? because it's my finger.

thumb_up thumb_down -18

Why did the chicken cross the road? It didn't it got run over on the way there.

thumb_up thumb_down +10

why did corey cross the road? the green man flashed.

thumb_up thumb_down +9

What did the lawyer say to the doctor? - Could you please take a look at my neck it has been hurting there for several weeks now.

thumb_up thumb_down -6

What's worse than a bee sting? Two bee stings. What's worse than two bee stings? The Holocaust. What's worse than the Holocaust? Three bee stings.

thumb_up thumb_down -12

Knock Knock Who's there? Doctor Ah, come in!

thumb_up thumb_down +1

A red-head, a brunette and a blond are trapped on an island 10km from civilization. The red-head swims 1.5km's, but is to tired, so she swims back to the island. The brunette swims 3km's, but is too tired, so she swims back to the island. After watching the first two fail, the blond evaluates the situation and decides that she does not possess the swimming ability required to reach the 5km point (At which swimming back to the island becomes equally as far as swimming to civilization), and instead stays on the island and creates a signal fire out of bits of debris scattered on the island, getting rescued within hours.

thumb_up thumb_down -2

What runs faster than a nigger with a stolen tv? His brother with the remote

thumb_up thumb_down -10

Whats better than winning gold in the special olympics? Not being retarded.

thumb_up thumb_down -18

What is worse than a bee sting? 2 bee stings. What's worse than 2 bee stings? Being eaten by a giant octopus. What's worse than being eaten by a giant octopus? 3 Bee Stings!

thumb_up thumb_down -5

-Knock knock. ~Use the doorbell. -Ding dong. ~The witch is dead!

thumb_up thumb_down -8

Knock Knock! we have a door bell ...ding dong. its broken.

thumb_up thumb_down +35

Q. How do you make your dog stop barking? A. Take it to the grocery store. Replace it with any popsicle in the fridge.

thumb_up thumb_down

How do you tell a clown his fly is open? Say sir your fly is open. Then beat him with a pipe until you cant tell what used to be his face.

thumb_up thumb_down -12

Cnorris can carry very heavy objects

thumb_up thumb_down +9

Why did the chicken cross the road? Because chickens do not possess the mental capacity to grasp the idea of "roads"

thumb_up thumb_down +53

What's black and white and read all over? Corn, I lied about everything.

thumb_up thumb_down -10

What's harder than winning an argument with a woman. Lonsdaleite which has recently been declared the hardest substance known to man, and can withstand 58% more stress than the hardest diamond crystal.

thumb_up thumb_down +30

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops