How do you make a kid with ADHD stay still? Shoot him in the knee cap

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When did Dom become so brave? When he made friends

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What's worse than finding a holocost in your apple. A truck full of dead babies then what's worse than finding a truck full of dead babies in your apple. Braving to pich fork them out

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Knock knock! Who's there? Dave. Dave who? Dave Smith. Oh, hey Dave. Come in.

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Ask me if I'm a tree. Are you a tree? No. Ask me if I'm a bush. Are you a bush? No.

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A man walks into a bar. The bartender lights him on fire.

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Why did the chicken crose the rode? Because there was a 10 foot scorpion chaseing it

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My spelling is horrible

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Q: How many burgers did little Johnny eat? A: Involuntary erections.

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Why is 6 afraid of 7.? Well 7 has suffered a tramatic brain injury, and has a tendancy to brutally attack anyone he comes in contact with. The whole situation is unfortunate.

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why does little Lucy have no friends? because she is in a wheelchair

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A poor woodcutter accidentally dropped his axe into the nearby river when taking a particularly forceful swipe at the tree he was cutting. He felt so dejected he wept. Then, the goddess of the river appeared. "What ails thee, my dear man?" she asked. "My axe -- it fell in the river!" stuttered the weeping woodcutter. "Do not worryI am the goddess of this river, and will find your axe!" said the River Goddess and dived into the river. After waiting eagerly for several minutes, the woodcutter was resigned to the fact that he had imagined the River Goddess.

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Why was six afraid of seven? Because seven had an extra penis.

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What is pretty, has big tits, talks like a guy, and has a dick? Your mom giving me a handjob.

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My sister has to take a dump

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Why did the chicken cross the road? It didn't. It was hit by a fridge halfway through walking.

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a dinosaur with a large clown hat is walking down the street when he is confronted by an obese monkey human with red hair. I set this up for a good pun, but the one i have is potatoes.

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What do you get when you cross an elephant and a rhino? Photoshop

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A man is walking down the street and sees a women sat on the pavement crying, he walks over to her and asks "what's wrong?" to which the women replies "it doesn't matter" the women then walks away as she did not want to share personal information with a stranger.

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What's red and sticky A DEAD BABY

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What did one retarded person say to another? asiuasdhfiusanklasndfkjlnknankjas

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How did the fat man die? Someone who was mad at society shot him and many others in the head while at the workplace.

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Two guys walk into a bar.... OUCH

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Why couldn't the old man see? Because he was stabbed in the eye.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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