Shut up, I already got that before you said it, typed it, whatever I do not give a fuck, I want the last word because, reasons of millions. I love you Nero come visit me sometime, wait ill come visit you, yes yes, but now shut up, I want the last word, because I made myself your bitch! You know its not what I mean the other way but then around again, I think, you are my I made myself your bitch, no wait, keep reading, you are, my bitch master..., pretty please let me have the last word? Never fucking mind! Have the last word, I surrender, I totally surrender I want my nose back XD.

What is bad at catch The twin towers

An Irish man, a Scottish man and an English man walk into a bar ... The Irish man's a bit dim, the Scotsman's tight with money and the Englishman's a bit of a racist.

What do you do when your baby won't stop crying. Slit its throat

How do you get a clown to stop laughing? Throw an axe at it's face.

Last Christmas, I gave you my heart but your body rejected the transplant and you died.

What's worse then getting socks on Christmas? Being murdered by a bear.

How did the blonde get blood on her Ipad? A terrible paper cut.

- have you heard about the guy who got the left side off the body cut off? - no. - He died

Why did the Black man drown? Because he could not and did not know how to swim. Because he could not afford the lessons to learn how to swim. Because he does not have the financial means to afford a lesson in swimming. Because he is of a low socio-economic level.

Roses are red Violets are blue Plants are green because of the high levels of mitochondria in their cells.

Why did the chicken cross the road? It didn't know any better. It very recently was decapitated in order tofeed the farmers family.

You know the drill, the world is not as black and white as it was before, just because we are not on the same side, does not make us enemies either. As for whatever is going on, I can assure you I had nothing to do with the fall of the first underground, and neither will I make sure whatever you scraped together, large or small falls either, I realize I should have thought this trough some more, but we had little time to act on this one.

whats black and white and red all over? ...a nun in a blender

How did Moses make his tea? He steeped the tea lives for around 5 minutes in hot water.

Two gay guys hosted a barbecue. The music and food was great. Everyone had a good time.

What do you call a black man flying a plane? A pilot.

Why did the man not make any change at his job? Because he is Barack Obama.

A white,mexican and asian man are walking together on the beach. They find a genie lamp and the genie says"since there are 3 of u u each get one wish" the black man says " i wish that all the mexicans would go back to mexico. " the asian man says " i wish all the asians would go back to asia" and the white man says " wait so the mexicans and asians arent in america right?" the genie said "that is correct!" the white man says " oh ok ill just taqke a coke then!"

What's more irritating than a half eaten apple? Some prick taking up half the page with shitty copy and past routine.

I fear I do, maybe someone fooled you, but that was originally one of my aliases.

what do you call a black who stabbed your entire family? it all depends on what his name happens to be

A black man sees a watch that he want. He then purchases it with his hard earned money.

Why didn't the skeleton go to the dance ? it was dead.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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