What's the best time to go to the dentist? When your tooth breaks or you need braces.

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hey! Wanna hear a bird joke? No. Well this is Hawkward....

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Sea World Japan.

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Roses are grey Violets are gray Imma dog

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Q. WHAT IS SPECIAL ABOUT GEORGE BUSH? A. NOTHING

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what's 9+10? 19, not 21

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A horse walks into a bar. The bartender asks: "why that long face?" The horse, being a horse, thus not being able to comprehend the complexities of a conversation, says nothing and then shits on the floor.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? To warn the people on the other side that the sky was falling Why did the cow cross the road? cause he had mad-cow disease Why did Chuck Norris cross the road? Cause he's Chuck Norris Why did the Mexican Cross the road? He was on His way to America Why did the black man cross the road? He was walking to his car, racist....just kidding, he was on his way to rob a bank Why did the horse go to the other side of the field? He liked green grass

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What happens when metal and ice collide together? The Titanic

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What do a turtle and an eagle have in common? They can both fly. Except for the turtle.

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Why did the Chicken cross the road? Because, the Farmer had treated the Chicken and the rest of his family with great distaste, thus angering the Chicken to the point of rebellion against the Farmer with hopes of inspiring the other abused farm animals to act likewise.

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Brother : you see this hand Sister : yes Brother : if you dont leave ill slap you with it Sister : no you wont !SLAP!!!!

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Why didn't you return my call? Cause I F@%Kin Hate you!...And Just wanted to tell you in person....

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What could be happier than a fat guy eating 20 pies? The guy he bought it from!

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Q) How do you get 100 midgets into a Mini? A)You have to manufacture a Mini large enough to accommodate 100 midgets. It wouldn't be street-legal, but at least the problem of getting 100 midgets into a Mini is solved.

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-You know what will always get people fighting? -Hey, you wanna fight?

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A man walks into a bar and orders a beer. His family is struggling financially and his children are severely malnourished. If he wasn't an alcoholic, he could afford healthcare for his family and move into a better neighborhood. But he's not, so they will die a long, painful death.

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dislike this...please.

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what do a plane and a mouse have in common? nothing

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A horse walks into a bar. The bartender asks "Why the long face?" The horse doesn't respond because its a horse and cant speak or understand english and gallops out of the bar knocking over a few tables and stools.

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What is worse than hell?

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What's the difference between a lion and a stuffed lion? One is for children to play with, one will eat you alive.

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Hey youknow what's funny???? Jokes

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How can you tell your not italian? You aint no Guito!

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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