bunnies are fluffy just like yo mama

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Yo mama smells so bad that she has no friends and killed herself.

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Justin Bieber walks out of a closet.

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What do you call a big group of Chinese people on Mars? An extraordinary feat for the Chinese space program and a historic day in human history, where a particular country has set up the first human colony on another planet and we have proven to ourselves that our race is capable of interplanetary travel and can accomplish anything if we set our minds to it.

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you know whats weird about italians? their italian

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What's worse than a bee sting? A katon.

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Q: What's worse than biting into an apple and finding a worm? A: Being caught by the store manager, arrested, convicted, and thrown into jail for petty theft and then getting ass-raped for the next 3 months all because you wanted to check an apple without paying for it.

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what is the difference of a bag of dead babies and a trampoline? I take off my shoes when I jump on a trampoline

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How do you stop a bus ? Put 3 small children in front of it Whats sad about 3 children who died in a bus crash ? They were my kids. How do you know if you're blind ? You run in to a wall

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does your face hurt? yeah, neither does mine.

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Roses are red, violets are blue my neighbor is black he will jump you too

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Why don't sharks attack lawyers? Professional Courtesy

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Don't chop the dinosaur daddy! OK.

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How can you tell if a man is choking? Stick a fridge down his throat

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what happens when you jump of a cliff usually you die

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Duncan Traywick is hilarious.

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Q. What's short and black A. A little black kid

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A panda walks into a restaurant, sits down and orders a sandwich. After he finishes eating the sandwich, the panda pulls out a gun and shoots the waiter, and then stands up to go. "Hey!" shouts the manager. "Where are you going? You just shot my waiter and you didn't pay for your sandwich!" The panda yells back at the manager, "Hey man, I am a PANDA! Look it up!" The manager's heart skipped a beat, and he locked himself inside his office, trembling with fear and confusion. Yes, it was plausible that a beast such as that could point to a random entry on the menu, and it was physically possible for it to pull the trigger of the gun (and, at such close proximity to the waiter, it would be pretty hard to miss him), but it was shocking and altogether disturbing to hear such an animal speak in human language, much less vernacular English.

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What do you call a bug stepped on 47 times, then burned to a crisp? Dead

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why did the boy call the girl a bitch? Because she was beautiful.

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Daym im romantic

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What did the Watermelon say to its baby? I'll SEED you later!

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A man stepped on a nail. He died shortly after of lockjaw.

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How do I recover from my Pokémon addiction? Catch 'em All!

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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