What does the color 9 smell like? Purple, because aliens don't wear hats

thumb_up thumb_down -25

Who is a nazi? • Theo Kingdom

thumb_up thumb_down +108

Why did the plane crash? Because the pilot was a loaf of bread

thumb_up thumb_down +7

A man walks into a bar after a hard day of work, and he meets this girl and they really kick it off, so the girl says, "lets go somewhere more, private" and they both go to a more secluded bar that has less decibels of noise.

thumb_up thumb_down +4

What couldn't the Asian drive? Because he had just gotten laser eye surgery, and the doctor recommended that he didn't drive for a few days.

thumb_up thumb_down +136

Why didnt suzy give mary i high five? because i cut off her hand

thumb_up thumb_down +15

What happened at the finish line of the marathon? People collapsed in exhaustion, it was a marathon.

thumb_up thumb_down +42

Why lets go Mets? Lets go Yankees!

thumb_up thumb_down -5

Why was the little girl crying? She got raped by a giant scorpion.

thumb_up thumb_down +8

Knock knock Who's there? Alzheimer's Alzheimer's who? T get to the other side of the road

thumb_up thumb_down -1

Q: Why did Frank have a big horse named Bubba? A: He was allergic to cats

thumb_up thumb_down +5

LIFE INSERT COIN TO BEGIN!!! SELECT DIFFICULTY EASY

thumb_up thumb_down -25

How many jews can you fit in a car? That depends on the volume of the car and the size of the people involved - different cars are of different sizes and can fit a different number of people. For instance, you could probably fit more than 20 midget jews in a van but you could probably not fit as many overweight jews in a coupé. However if you put some effort into getting as many standard sized people, in this case jews for reasons unknown, into a standard size sedan you should be able to fit about seven or eight in the car itself and one in the trunk, making a total of nine or ten.

thumb_up thumb_down +41

Why are blondes so dumb? They aren't dumb they just have prejudice against them

thumb_up thumb_down +5

The government wants us to stop using gas and be eco friendly. Tell that to Hitler.

thumb_up thumb_down +26

q: why do mens testicles hang? a: so woman can kick us in em

thumb_up thumb_down +21

Why didn't the black man drink out of the white water fountain? Because he wasn't thirsty.

thumb_up thumb_down +36

Roses are red. I have OCD. That rose IS red right.. Let me check again.

thumb_up thumb_down +4

Why did the milkman wear a white belt? To keep his pants up.

thumb_up thumb_down +45

Roses are red Violets are blue I've got Alzheimer's Cheese on toast

thumb_up thumb_down +20

There once was a man from Nantucket I raped him. The End.

thumb_up thumb_down +29

A priest enters a bar moments after a young teen walks into the same bar. The priest scolds the teen, warning him of the possibility of arrest, alcoholism, and other bad life consquences. The teen apologizes to the bartender, and much later in life, he thanks the priest.

thumb_up thumb_down +41

Roses are Red, Violets are Blue.... I hate your guts.

thumb_up thumb_down +5

How do you scare Chris Ferguson? No one knows, he always has a pokerface on.

thumb_up thumb_down -17

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops