What's short, white, and is sick and tired of your shit? A toilet. What's white and killed Elvis? Also a toilet.

thumb_up thumb_down -1

Why did the kitten die? Because your mom is gay.

thumb_up thumb_down -18

Saying "MY MOM" everyone time ur asked a question

thumb_up thumb_down -47

How many Mexicans does it take to cross the border? Don't answer, just think and laugh.

thumb_up thumb_down -12

Red are roses, blue are violets I'm dislexic.

thumb_up thumb_down +8

A black man and a white man were on an island. They lived in England.

thumb_up thumb_down +11

A gorilla walks into a bar and gets a banana martini. The bartender thinks that this is peculiar, and then he realizes he is dreaming. He wakes up and tells his wife about this ridiculous dream that he had. His wife ignores him, and the man rolls over and begins to sob because he realizes that his marriage is in shambles.

thumb_up thumb_down -8

Why is six afraid of seven? Seven is a convicted rapist.

thumb_up thumb_down +4

Question what is blue and floats Answer everything that is blue that foes not sink

thumb_up thumb_down -7

Why did the plane crash? Because the pilot was a loaf of bread.

thumb_up thumb_down -21

What do you call 10 Asians playing basketball? A group of friends hanging out and having a good time.

thumb_up thumb_down +42

What is big and white and will kill you if it falls from a tree? My d**k.

thumb_up thumb_down +36

Have you heard of the dog that sounds like Megan fox? No Oh, well ummm apperantally there's this ummm dog that sounds like Megan fox. So ummm yeah. Pretty interesting stuff

thumb_up thumb_down -9

Knock Knock. Who's there? Doctor. Doctor Who? Doctor Watson - I'm here to see your little sister who is currently terminally ill and every second is of vital importance. Therefore this exchange of words is only worsening the already terrible situation that we find ourselves in. Please open the door.

thumb_up thumb_down +9

A blond is on her way driving to the airport when she sees the sign "Airport left." She made a left turn and got to her flight on time.

thumb_up thumb_down +20

How do u stop sky from being gay. You don't

thumb_up thumb_down +20

Yo mamma is so dumb, she bought a Wii and was satisfied with her purchase

thumb_up thumb_down +14

why didnt the old man go to his sons birthday he died.........nah i lied he went went

thumb_up thumb_down -27

There are two types of people in this world. People who can count, and people who can't.

thumb_up thumb_down +24

Sure, if my waifu aproves, hell, the more the hornier. CONDOMS? ARE YOU INSANE? CONDOMS ARE FOR PUSSIES... ..:WHIIIIIICH sorta makes sense so okay, my for a moment I thought you where not gonna go trough with this... Nah just kidding, I already got you, now if you want to break free I am gonna be like "MEH!" So, uh, you shaven or not? Please dont be "trimmed", sometimes it just looks like a pussy with a mustachio, thats bullshit.

thumb_up thumb_down +31

why did the husband always work late nights? he needed the extra hours to provide for his family

thumb_up thumb_down -6

What's utter destruction but still has wheels? A car that was crushed at a junk yard, after the Bridgestone tires were removed for another car that could still use them

thumb_up thumb_down -7

Q:How did the blonde commit suicide? A: She didn't, she sought help and was able to live a very happy life with a beautiful family in a nice suburb outside of Cincinnati.

thumb_up thumb_down -13

Artists have unique minds and can rotate shapes within their mind. I'm going to masterbate.

thumb_up thumb_down -5

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops