What do you call a man who just died 5 minutes ago? Dead.

What did the lady find out when she went to the doctor. She had breast cancer.

Why did the chicken cross the road? It didn't, most chickens are held on farms, but those that do roam free are afraid of automobiles so therefore they wouldn't go near a road at all. But if the chicken was located in a deserted town there would be no traffic, so then it would be able to cross freely over any road there and not get injured or mortally wounded.

An amputee walks into a bar with a big smile on his face and sits down. The bartender looks over at him and asks "How did you lose your arm?" The amputee doesn't respond because he has been deaf and mute since birth.

What did the moose say to the photographer? Moose say cheese.

What did Helen Keller do at a concert? Sit.

Two Guys walk into a bar; the second one should have seen it coming.

Why was 6 afraid of 7? 7 was black.

why did the 1st koala fall out of the tree ? it was dead why did the 2nd koala fall out of the tree ? it was hit by the first koala why did the 3rd koala fall out of the tree ? it thought it was a game why did the 4th koala fall out of the tree ? it was hit by a fridge why did the 5th koala fall out of the tree ? it was inside the fridge

A physician, an engineer, and an attorney were discussing who among them belonged to the oldest of the three professions represented. But neither one of them knew.

Who found Anne Frank? The Nazis

Say the line below sixteen times very fast: I like to find threes and peel of their... BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK... Done? Good boy!

A six foot chicken, a horse, and a muskrat walk into a bar. They are then detained by animal control and the bar undergoes a thorough cleaning.

Why did the black man go to school? So he could graduate with a degree and persue his life in medicine. He later goes on to get his P.H.D. He now supports his healthy family of 5 and living in Idaho, the state of the potato. He has a job as a doctor and is making more than $2M a year. Ha, didn't expect that now did ya.

What is the difference between and Jew and a Boy Scout? The Boy Scout comes back from camp.

Three blokes walk into a bar. I'm british.

Hey diddle diddle, the cat and the fiddle, the cow jumped over the moon. It burnt up on re-entry

What is the difference between a black person and a bicycle? You can sell a bicycle legally.

Q: What do you call a car full of black people? A: Stolen

whats worse than dropping your toast butter side down ? being ripped apart from the anus upwards by a large black man

Why did Sally fall off the swing? She had no arms.

Q: What did the little boy with cancer get for Christmas? A: A funeral.

Walk in to a room and sing "if you're deaf and you know it, clap your hands!"

Why did the chicken cross the road? ..To get to the other side

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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