roses are red violets are blue i have some cheese im going to eat it

what makes white men feel embarrassed and and ashamed? when they find out their girllfriend has been sleeping with a black man.

Roses are red, violets are blue, the face like yours belongs to the zoo. Please don't be sad, 'cos I'll be there too.. Not in the cage but laughing at you!

Why did the chicken cross the road? He crossed the road to get to a podium. He then made a lond speech about how chickens should be able to cross a road with out having their motives questioned.

knock knock who's there? rock rock who? rock on the ground, don't trip

Q: What did the bulbasaur say to the charmanderr?? A: bulbasaurrr

What did the skeleton say to the vampire? Nothing because a skeleton wouldn't have a larynx.

Knock Knock! Who's there? Pen. Pen who? Pen is blue.

Why was the black man hand cuffed by a woman cop? Because they are a married couple who feel like role play will help spark their sex life again.

If Santa and a Blonde woman jump off a building who hits the ground 1st? They both do due to Galileo's discovery of two objects with different masses but similar densities hit the ground at the same time.

My mom was telling my brother how much it hurt when she stubbed her toe. He told her she should try child birth.

Why did the girl drop her cookie? She had no arms.

An alcoholic is someone you don't like who drinks as much as you do.

What did the Insomniac, Dyslexic Priest do? He stayed up all night wondering if there really is a Dog.

what do you call a boomerang that doesn't work? a stick

Why did the panda fall out of the tree? Because he was dead. Why did the second panda fall out of the tree? Because he was stapled to the first panda. Why did the third panda fall out of the tree? Because he was dead. Why did the fourth panda fall out of the tree? Peer pressure. -BG_Shank_A

What do you call an African-American, Latino, Asian, and Canadian all on the same football team? A reasonably diverse group of teammates who are most likely good acquaintances.

Why did the girl commit suicide? She has been abused severely for seven years by her pet kangaroo.

Q. You are driving a car. In front of you there is a camion driving at your same speed. Behind you there is a helicopter flying at your same speed at the ground level. On your left there is an ambulance driving at your same speed and on your right there is a ravine. How do you get out from this horrible situation? A. Get off the carousel.

A fairly-priced Apple computer.

Lol, thats funny, sorry for asking, but is your eye doing better? Was their IQ test the same one you get when you enter their site?

A boy asked his dad Why are Chinese eyes like that. His dad replied there concentrating that's why there so smart The boy went up to a student in his class and said look I'm like you The teacher asked who told him that he said his dad The dad was called up by the school when the teacher told him what his son did he went GOOZILLA His wife asked him what he was up to and he said farting on her face when she was a sleep 3 days later he found out his wife was cheating on him he knocked on the door only to realize he was on drugs and that he never had a family.

Q: A giraffe fell in a hole and died. Which was taller the Lion or Giraffe? A: The Giraffe was before it died

Whats worse than receiving a dollar? Receiving a penny.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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