Roses are red, Violets are blue, I have Alzheimer's, Who are you?

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Roses are red Violets are blue I'm dyslexic couldn't tell, could you?

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What is just as real as a unicorn? World peace

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Why did the chicken cross the road? To get to the other side which would be a incontrovertible (obvious) decision.

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A man walks in to a bar. He was hospitalized and died later that day.

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Santa Claus is so hairy he need to shave more often.

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Two muffins are sitting in an oven. They then proceed to bake into tasty pastries which are then eaten for snacks or maybe a light breakfast.

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"Horse walks into a bar... Bartender says It's probably not a good idea that you're in here. You're a very large animal. Any sudden movements, you may injure somebody. I don't know why you're here. None of the glasses are ergonomically designed for you to drink from them. So, you should probably leave."

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Whats the difference between a Mexican and a bench? a bench is a structure designed for sitting and a Mexican is a person born in Mexico.

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Why did the black kid fail in school? Because of the achievement gap.

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Why did the chicken open door? It can't. Chickens don't have hands.

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Sir, your wife is dead

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How many rich men does it take to screw in a light bulb? One, to hire an electrician to do it for him.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? It had just escaped from the slaughterhouse and ran for its life.

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Violets are blue Roses are red I stabbed you 37 times in the chest Now you're dead

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How do you know if you have a good slave? It is hard working and determined... And black

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roses are blue violetrs are green im shooting heroine into my head

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Where's the best place to buy moon bars? Michael Toal

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Think of a number, add it by 7, subtract it by 2, and multiply it by 4. Now close your eyes, isn't it dark?

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why did the guy get pulled over he had a broken tail light

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Chuck Norris can count from 1 to 100... twice!

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Me: Hello. You: Oh, hi. Me: How are you today? You: I'm fat.

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A man walks into a bar. His alcohol dependency is tearing his family apart.

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What's small, cold, and lifeless? A dead baby.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops