What did the guy say when he dropped his baby? "oh no!"

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Two nuns are in a bathtub, one nun turns to the other and says "where's the soap". The other nun replies "it does, doesn't it".

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Knock, Knock... Whose there? panther panther who? panth-er no panths im goin' swimmin'

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roses are grey violets are grey everything is? grey i'm colour blind fml

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Yo momma so hairy she needs to shave herself.

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Why did old Mary fall off the cliff? There were no brakes on her wheelchair

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Why doesnt your dad like barrack Obama? because your dad is straight, hes not into men

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A squirrel got killed by getting hit by a truck haha its funny cuz the squirrel died

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, I've got a gun, get in the van.

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What do you call an German with a knife in his leg ? An ambulance as he has a serious leg wound and will soon die of blood loss

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Yo momma so ugly, she makes french people say "you are ugly" in whatever language they speak.

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25

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David Copperfield (the magician you moron). "I will now perform my greatest act yet!" Everyone applauded as he put the screaming woman (for effects you know) into the first end of the meatgrinder, and surprisingly grinded meat came out the other side! And the woman? She disappeared... forever! *applause* Moral: BRAVO! BRAVO!

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Coach walks into a bar and asks for a drink. The bartender says, i can't serve you. You aren't wearing pants. Coach says "put it on my bill."

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I once saw my grandparents making love.. that's why I dont eat raisens

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Q Why did the feminist cross the road? A To suck my dick

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If I could rearrange the letters of the alphabet.... dklaujeo bnvalue doiandkluq!!

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A duck walks into a bar and the bartender asks "What'll you have?" and the duck says "Quack". The bartender is then promptly fired and committed to the nearest mental institution for thinking that ducks can talk and order beer.

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Every zoo is a petting zoo if you're not a pussy

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Why was the man so angry? Because the woman was not in the kitchen

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What do you call a Jew A Jew

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What is the biggest lie in the entire universe? " I have read and agree to the Terms of Service"

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Did you know that Hellen Keller had an amusement park in her backyard? Neither did she.

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What do you do if you walk outside and see your t.v. floating in the lawn in the middle of the night? Go back inside.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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