What did Facebook say to Twitter, and twitter to blogg ant blogg to youtube? nothing. They cant talk..

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I am just not using any mentalism nor any of those techniques anymore that is all, is it alright if I call you now?

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Knock Knock? WHAT?!?!?

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Theres 3 guys walking and the see a genie. He says hell grant 3 wishes. The first guy asked for sandals. The genie said"I can do that" and he got sandals. The second guy asked for rock hard abs.The genie said,"sure thing".When he looked down, he saw that he had rock hard abs. The third guy asked for a pair of pants."ok" Said the genie. And then he got a pair of pants.

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In particle-joke physics, the antijoke is the extension of the concept of the antiparticle to the joke, where the antijoke is composed of antiparticles in the same way that the normal joke is composed of particles. Furthermore, mixing jokes and antijokes can lead to the annihilation of both, in the same way that mixing antiparticles and particles does.The result of antijoke meeting jokes is an explosion.[1]

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What do you call a dolphin mixed with a cheetah? I have no idea I was hoping you knew.

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What did Billy say when he met the president? Nice to meat you Mr. President? -Louis

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What do you call a man with a bad haircut? A man with a bad haircut

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What's worse than a worm in your apple? Captchas.

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As I sat waiting for the doctor to return with my final prognosis, I began contemplating my own mortality. Looking inside myself, one question continued to haunt me: “What’s the X-ray technician going to do when he walks in and sees me messing with the equipment?”

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Recent US presidents (and their accompanying economy)

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knock knock who's there? The police your family is dead

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Knock Knock Who's There? Dave I don't know a Dave, Please leave.

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What do squirrels and Justin bieber have in common? Everything.

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Why did little Jimmy go crying to his mummy? Because she was shot.

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Why did the dinosaur cross the road? Because chickens hadn't evolved yet.

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A blonde walks into a bar. She enjoys a refreshing, cold beverage with friends before returning home to sleep ahead of another day of hard work as a scientist.

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There once was a girl who took away my source of entertainment. Her name was Nicole.

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OH LOOK I'M A SAILOR I KNOW NAUTICAL PHRASES! LIKE...... KNOTS AND MAST AND SHIP AND SEA AND STUFF

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A: Do you want to hear a joke? B: Sure. A: Do you want to hear a short one or a long one? B: uh... a short one. A: joke. Do you want to hear a long one? joooooooke.

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What makes Stephen Hawking such a lame scientist??? A: he has a disabling disease. It's called ALS.

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What did the fireman say to the people in the burning house I'm going to use this water for my sprinkler rather than saving your lives. I might as well use this for something more significan, like my lawn.

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When the black man was driving his car, why did he stop in front of the gun store? Because his car's velocity reached zero at that location.

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What color is my lamp? Brown

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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