your mom.

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A man has a meeting with his doctor and his doctor says "I have some bad news, you have cancer and you have alzheimer's," to which the man replies... "Well at least I don't have cancer." This is an example of a fallacy claim.

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What do you get when you cross the motorway with a lottery ticket? You get knocked down and killed.

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a man walks into a bar the bar tender says why the long face? i just walked into a bar

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How could they tell Michael Jackson was dead? He showed no vital signs.

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Why did Gus go to the HC? Because he got high off his ass.

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Why do firemen wear red suspenders? If they didn't, their turnout gear would not effectively protect them from flames.

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what's pink and fluffy? pink fluff

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mat (telling anti joke): so you are stranded in a desert, right and kyle: no. Mat: no man i'm Kyle: no (kyle was later found dead)

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Q: How did Whitney Houston die? A: Who?

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selena gomez & justin beiber go in space. selena says im hotter than the sun. the way she knows this information is that she is near the sun at this time justin beiber has already drifted of in space.

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What do you call a fish with no eyes? A blind fish.

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If your flying upstream in a kayak and a wheel flys off, how many pancakes can fit into a dog house? None, because ice-cream is alergic to frogs!

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When I eat Mi Familia Mexica food, it burns when I go to the bathroom. Is that bad?

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Nobody likes you ya noob! (-_-) *sniff* MAN YOU SMELL BAD

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Why did the black man scream in church? He felt like it.

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What do you call a man sitting at the bar drinking alone? An alcoholic.

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An elephant walks up to a camel and says why have you got a pair if boobs on your back, the camel the replies that's a funny question coming from someone with a dick on their face.

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A man goes to the beach to meat babes, but know one seemes to notice him. The man notices another man with a crowed of beautiful women surrounding him. Later that day he stops the man and asks him, how do you get all those girls? the man replies put a potato in your bathing suit. so the next day the man puts a potato in his bathing suit, this time he notices girls walking by and laughing, he goes to the man at the end of the day and asks why it did not work, the man replies, next time try putting the potato in the front

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How many dead babies can you fit in a bath tub? 17

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What's funnier than Man on Woman domestic abuse? Nothing.

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What looks like a 50p and has a narrow back?

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Why couldn't the baby boy read the book? He had eye cancer and was therefore blind.

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Knock knock. Who's there? Silence. Silence who? No, I meant there was silence, I didn't really say anything. Oh, OK. But seriously, who's there?

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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