(approach girl) How much does a polar bear weigh? Enough to fit into the same dress as you

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Why didn't the man give a location of the murderer? He was murdered

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the blue man livedin the blue house the black man in the black house the white man in the white house but who lived in the white house ,not the white man barack obama

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My claustrophobia was cured by imagining that all small spaces were naked.

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Why did Sara fall off the swing? Because she had no arms... Knock knock. Who's there? Not Sara.

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Know what im sayin'? No but im wearing pants

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What's orange and is a loyalist in the orange order? Caoimhin McCann?

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What's worse than losing the remote? A steamroller going backwards on the highway.

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josh- your a strange boy. liam- yes. due to by up bringing i have been exposed to unusual situations that most people do not encounter therefore affecting how i behave. Secondly the definition of normal is varying from person to person making being normal to every human being difficult to even the most capable of people. Essentialy Josh i care little for you comment. *josh was a black man who died of cancer 6 weeks after this incodent*

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Why does Magic Johnson always use extra large condoms? Because he's got a giant dick and HIV.

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-Have you seen Stevie Wonders new house? -No. -Well niether has he.

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-Whats not funny and has wheels? >What? -The Holocaust... I was lying about the wheels

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I was going to write a joke about how I have alzheimers but than I forgot it

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Why did the man scream? He got shot in the eye with a nail gun.

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Hey your name is really Tifa? Sorry, I hate scheming, but in this kind of situation I have to play things safe, I have a wife to take care off, I mean it, I really hate it. Anyway, I got your number, location everything, now if you did send people to harm or even worse kill me, you wont be doing that again, trust me, if I die of an assault, you die next, whoever you are.

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What's the correct way to eat spaghetti? Put it in your mouth.

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whats worst than finding a worm in your apple???? an apple in your worm.

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What do you call a man with a bad haircut? A man with a bad haircut

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Q. On a scale of 1-100, how immature are you? A. 69.

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Q:What happened when Smokey the Bear was the one who started the forest fire? A: He got arrested just like you would have

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Why was six afraid of seven? The world may never know.

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Q. Whats the difference between watermelons and people? A. Watermelons don't smoke pot...

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why couldnt the mexican jump the fence? He broke his leg.

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Q. How many ADD kids does it take to screw in a lightbulb? A. Lets go ride bikes

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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