Why is the baby not crying? Because it died of herpes. JUST KIDDING! Babies can't get herpes.

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knock knock "whos there ?" "the police , your husband has died" "ok"

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I would tell you a joke about a blunt pencil but it's pointless

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Why do sharks swim in salt water? Pepper water makes them sneeze! Why do whales swim in salt water? They can't survive in fresh water.

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Why did the middle age man walk across the street? There were no vehicles currently driving on that particular road

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Everyone is special in there own ways except for patrick whos demented

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Knock knock. Who's there? Auntie.

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What's 21 and pregnant? Ariana Grande

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What do you call a middle-eastern man flying a plane? A pilot

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If a brick said "hi" what you reply with? Nothing. You can't reply to something that doesn't speak.

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Why didn't the chicken cross the road? ... Well, do you know or not?

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Why is this an anti-joke? Are you laughing? Exactly.

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What did the you know what screw this I'm sick of making these stupid jokes there all the same. Hang on hang on What did the pirate do to the dog yes This style of joking is so different I'm going to be a famous comedian oh wait there's a whole bloody website full of these. O look another one and another one and another one that knife over there looks really nice right now

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Question to make it sound like a racist joke? Politically correct answer that should not offend anyone.

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Why did the girl scream for help? She was being raped.

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What smells like dead rats? Dead hamsters

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How do you have sex with the blue waffle? stick your penis inside

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Q. What do black people, Asians, and Irishmen call their moms? A. "Mom"

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I was walking on the beach when I heard a man yell "Help, Shark, Help!" and I laughed, because I knew the shark wasn't going to help him.

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PPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEENNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNN cil you have such a dirty mind

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how many large people can you fit in a bath tub ... 1/16

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A kid walks into a bar, everyone fled the bar because they were all afraid of goats

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A. Big feet, you know what that means B. He has to order his shoes on line because they don't carry his size in stores.

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What do communists and strawberries have in common? You can eat them.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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