Why are black people afraid of lawn mowers? Because whenever you start it, it says run nigga nigga.

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Penis, eggs, mushrooms and tigers

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What's blue and thrashes about on the floor? A baby playing in a plastic bag. How do you make a man pregnant? Stick a dead baby up his ass! How do you stop a baby falling down a manhole? Stick a javelin through it's head. How many babies does it take to paint a house? Depends how hard you throw them. -S

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What did the 11 year old boy get for christmas? A wet dream

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whats black and white and black and white and black and white? a penguin rolling down a hill whats black and white and laughing? the penguin that pushed him

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Why didn't the man laugh at his son's joke? Because he was born without a mouth.

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Hey I just met you, And this is crazy, I've got dementia, Hey I just met you.

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What is the difference between Sarah Jessica Parker and a horse? Sarah Jessica Parker is a human being who is also a very skilled actress A horse is a animal which is usualy kept in a barn

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What starts with a P and ends with O-R-N? porn

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Lets just say some of my boys owed me a favor, and that if we where all "clean slate workers" I would never have been able to pull some favors out of the higher ups. As far as for "these Shadows" of yours, I know nothing, while I invented the encoding format for the messages you use, I intend keeping it to myself. People here will still assume this is bullshit unless you get somebody to hack this site, believe me, its pretty damn easy to retrieve whatever data might have been lost.

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What is your bill about? Clinton

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Q: What is the answer to 255 x 23? A: A number!

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why was little bobby sad? he accidentally super-glued Jupiter to his forehead.

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Technically rainbows are white.....and have gold at the end.

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if justin beiber was dating a girl what would you call him? a lesbian

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Where does Hemech take a shit? The toilet's ass

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knock knock who's there aids

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A mathematician, a physicist, and an engineer walk into a bar. They order some drinks, sit quietly and stare at their shoes until they've finished their drinks, then go back home and wallow in loneliness, wishing their social skills weren't so abysmal.

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Q: why did the boy cross the road A: because he was being chased by a pedophile

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What's funny about Antijokes.com? Everything

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What did the homeless man get for his birthday? AIDS

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what do you call a Ukranian woman without a visa? my maid

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What do you call a woman with one leg shorter than the other? Whatever her name is.

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Why do girls swim naked in lakes and oceans? so they have an excuse why their pussies smell like either tuna or cat fish.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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