How do you hack into someone's computer? A few good hits with a hatchet should do the trick

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what happens when a retard hits an iceberg with a gigantic boat? 1517 people die.

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Why was the boy dead? The boy was hit by a bus ran over by a train and stabbed to death by a murderer then put into a grinder for a meal for the murderer.

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what do you call when a penis is inside a vagina? sex

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What's worst than biting into an apple and finding a worm? The holoca- *the man hearing the joke then pulls out a desert eagle and shoots the man in the chest before finishing the joke then goes to jail for the rest of his life*

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What's red and has four letters? A stop sign

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Why couldn't the pirate enter into the movie? Because he's dead.

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Why are rich people usually fat? They're living large

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i like men but im not gay

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Lil' Wayne

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What do a Siamese cat and a birch tree have in common? Both exist.

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A man walks into a bar, and immediately sees a person with a big orange head seated near the back. He asked the bartender "why does that man have a big orange head?" "Buy him a drink and maybe he'll tell you." So the man bought him a drink and asked the guy with the big orange head why he has a big orange head, and he told him this story: "I was traveling in the sahara desert 10 years ago when I found a pure gold lamp in the sand. I rubbed the sand off so I could read what was on the side when a genie popped out and gave me 3 wishes. First I wished for many riches, and at once gold was all around my feet. Exited, I wished for the most beautiful wife in the world, and right in front of me appeared the most beautiful woman I had ever seen. Third, I wished for a big orange head.

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What happens when you shoot a bear and you kill it? It dies.

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Why was Jerry Sanduski at K-Mart? He heard boys pants were half off!

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Shit, I can't think of anything to write. That does not mean I'm black

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Why do Asian men love noodles? Noodles are delicious!

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How you make a duck cry? Raping it. How you make it shut up? Killing it. Why did no one helped the duck? Because the duck has no friends.

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why did the chicken cross the road? because it wanted to get to the other side! why did the chipmunk cross the road? because it was stapled to the chicken

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Knock Knock Who's there? You have AIDS

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Knock Knock Who's there? The police, your entire family died in a car accident

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A man walks into a bar. He goes up to the Bar Tender and says, "Hit me with all you got!" The bar tender then ducks down under the bar out of sight. He comes back up with a sledge hammer and viciously murders the man. Blood spews everywhere and many others are brutally murdered shortly afterwards. :)

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Why did the clown fall off the unicycle? Because I shot him in the face.

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What's worse than failing an exam? Failing two exams.

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Knock knock. Who's there? Apple. Apple who? Apple juice.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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