What does a black guy and an apple have in common? They're both apples except for the black guy

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, Where is the bathroom, I need to go poo.

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I had 99 problems Solved them all

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Why isn't eating an Olympic sport? Because that wouldn't make any sense.

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TOYS TOYS TOYS IN THE ATTIC

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What black and white and red all over? A penguin in a blender

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Why do jews love money so much? Because money is very valuable and everyone loves it.

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What happens when you shoot a black man? You go to prison because murder is a criminal offense.

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What'd the boy with no arms and legs get for Christmas? Just Dance 2 the video game

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Fill in the blank: A ______ is a man's best friend. Jake: Is it dog? Host: YES! Now for the 1 million dollars! Finish the sentence: I just saved a lot of money by Jake: Switching to Geico? Host: Sorry, that's incorrect. The correct answer is "I just saved a lot of money by not spending it on useless junk and by budgeting my account towards investing in the future." Oh well, nice try.

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A duck walks into a bar.... Animal control is swiftly called and the duck is relocated to a nearby park.

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your mother is so obese, that she really should look into eating a well balanced diet and taking part in an excercise plan that suits her

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Why was the boy with a green and blue collared shirt holding a bottle of rice dead at the bottom of the sea? Because he was pushed of a boat and couldn't swim.

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boo

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What shall we do with the drunken sailor? Call the police to have him escorted off the boat for operating a large veichle under the influence of alcohol.

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Guy- Wanna hear a joke about my dick? Nah, it's too long. Girl- Wanna hear a joke about my vagina? Nah, you'll never get it.

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What do You call a man with no arms or legs? Dead, He died of blood loss 3 hours ago

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Q: What is worse than seven babies in a trash can? A: One baby in seven trash cans. Q: What is worse than one baby in seven trash cans? A: The Holocaust.

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What do you call a black man flying a plane? The pilot. You racist.

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Why doesn't Caillou have hair? Because he has cancer.

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Knock knock. Who's there? Cook Pu. Ok then. Kelvin Yang.

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Yo mama is so fat, she is thinking of going on a diet.

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A white guy, a black guy, an Indian guy, and a Jewish guy walk into a bar. They drink in moderation and discuss their children, the current state of the economy, and global politics before retiring home to their families.

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Harry Styles

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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