John is at the movies, when he drops his cookie on the floor. A passer-bier accidentally steps on it as he's about to pick it up. "Sorry" says his man. "I guess that's the way the cookie crumbles" said Terry. The man then proceeds to murder Terry.

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HOw do u DEFeat thE hatErsz shitted on em

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3 black men walk into a bar. They order their drinks, tip the bartender, and could not have been more courteous.

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What was so special about Anna Frank's diary? Nothing. --ZeNaziGermanDoctor

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Why are gay guys so good at being gay? The black guys told them too.

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on a planet, in a galaxy, far far away... you have cancer

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What happens when you give someone a free chocolate bar? ThEeyroast it and vapourise it intheir hands....no they eat it

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A German and an American walk into a bar. George W. Bush got hurt, but Albert Einstein didn't.

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7

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A man gets home from work with red on his collar. His wife asks what it is. The man replies "I had sex with a young woman, your to old and you disqust me"

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a blond readhead and a brunnett were driving to Miami, they saw a sign for next exit Miami, turned off the exit went to the beach did some shopping and all had a great time together.

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A lady was walking to the grocery store as she was walking she saw a old lady with a dog behind them where two black merses and about 200 women behind the merses. The lady Rushes over and ask '' Maim i am sorry to bother you but i would like to know who you lost and how?'' The old lady paused for a minute and awnsered '' I lost my husband and mother in law, Well My husband had just walked in to the house and my new dog went and ferousiously atacted him my mother in law had been living with us at the time she the jumped in and tried to help him They both died because of blood loss'' The lady looked at her with simpathy and thought i feel sorry for her husband and his mother she then asked '' Can i barrow your dog'' the old lady looked puzzled and said '' Get in line '' The lady walked to the end of the line as the dog was Passed to a women and taken home then passed back. When the women got her turn she thought do i want to kill my husband then she thought yes

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A Mexican, A Caucasian and An African American walk into a bar. Suddenly, a rival of the African American's pulls up in a used Chevrolet and shoots him 6 times with a semi-automatic handgun. The Mexican and Caucasian are distraught and call 911 immediately. The rival is later arrested and found guilty of murder in the first degree by a jury of his peers. Less than 6 months later, the bar is closed due to the negative stigma surrounding the shooting. Urban life is a harrowing and tough experience that most outsiders will never fully understand.

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Why did the plane crash? Because a loaf of bread was the pilot.

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How did Helen Keller burn the side of her face? She didn't use enough sunscreen.

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Q: Why is grass green? A: I painted it.

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Your mom is soo fat that when God said "let there be light" he had to ask her to move

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I once shot an elephant in my pajamas. I suffer from a debilitating sleep disorder.

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What's the difference between an onion and a baby ? You cry when you cut the onion.

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Why was the grandomther crying? She just got pepper sprayed.

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A naked man walks into a bar and is promptly arrested for indecent exposure.

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Why did Greg move to the Lake District? Because his dog died and the family is in mourning.

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What did the waffle say when the black guy started eating him? Nothing, because waffles are inanimate objects and therefore cannot talk.

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Hey there, I like bananas! No you don't.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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