What did the asian kid do before he got a blood test? He studied.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Chickens can not talk, therefore we can never find out from the chicken, who is the only thing that knows why it crossed the road. Scientists have study chickens and say that it most likely saw something edible, like a bug or some grain and walked over to eat it.

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whats long, hard, and full of semen? A submarine

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A duck walks up to a lemonade stand and says nothing to the man running the stand. Realizing that the duck might potentially keep patrons from approaching the stand, he packs up and moves elsewhere.

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A guy walks into a bar. He's thirsty and wants a beer.

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1100110001012....HOLY S@&$ A 2!

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What is the color of your spleen? I dont know i'm not a doctor

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How did the Pollack die? Cardiac arrest.

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Have you heard that joke about Helen Keller? No. Neither has she.

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What kind of doctors would you call A 30 year old chimpanzee? I would say "Plastic surgeon" but that would be unscrupulous to the chimpanzees because the tearing off or "lifting" of the owners face is because they are just animals. And should have never been kept in captivity that long anyways.

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Ask me if im an Airplane. Are your Airplane? Hell yes

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Roses are red Grass is green Get in the van If you know what I mean

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Roses Are Red Violets Are Blue If I Had A Brick I Would Throw It At You

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Whay lawrence pearson ir r8 gay

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PLEASE HELP IM TRAPPED IN SOME GUYS HOUSE PLEASE SOMEBODY HAS TO SEE THIS IF I TEXT HE WILL SEE IT IM AT

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What benefits came from the September 11th attacks? None. It was one of the most horrific tragedies in American History

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So um think of two things. Oh wait backspace that. What's the difference between Rebecca Black and your mom? Ok answer. Ok stop no seriously so. Enter. Ok Enter. Q backspace A nope Chuck Testa

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i have a six pack.... of crayons......... just kidding i ate two of them

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How do you make a baby cry? You hit it in the face with a hammer.

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What do you call a Chinese man flying plane? A pilot.

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What happens if you Put a Mental Patient in a cage He goes crazy, Develops schizophrenia and Eventually dies of Many Incurable Diseases

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Once you go black, you have a high chance of being in an interracial relationship.

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why was little bobby sad? he accidentally super-glued Jupiter to his forehead.

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Two crabs are standing on a wall. One of them falls down. The second one's name is Georges.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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