What did Batman say to Superman? Nothing, he killed him with a kryptonite spear.

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How many Puerto Ricans does it take to clog the treads of my tank? Eight

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A married couple is arguing over the temperature in their house. The wife wants it at 62 degrees and the husband wants it at 74. What should they do? Nothing while they are arguing their daughter decides to put it at 32 and freeze them to death

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Holocaust jokes suck. Anne frankley, I won't stand for them

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If life though you lemons, through skittles at them and say tast the freakin rainbow.

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Knock knock Who's there? The police. Your husband has been killed in an accident.

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Why did Debby drop her ice cream? She was hit by a bus.

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A: Ask me if I'm a truck. B: Are you a truck? A: No.

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No one walks into a bar. It is closed.

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A guy walks into a bar. The second guy ducks.

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What did Osama Bin Laden say to Hitler? Nothing. Hitler died many years ago now and he was in no position of power during Bin Laden's reign of terror due to the fact that he was already dead. Therefore it is impossible that they could have had any sort of conversation. But now Bin Laden is dead as well. HIGH FIVE!!!!!!!

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a duck walks onto a basketball court during a game. The referee sees the bird and blows his whistle crying fowl just as the player was running up to dunk. The confused bird flies away and the referee gets punched by the angry player.

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I got shot in the balls now i'm pregnant?

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A man walks into a bar, orders a drink, drinks it, and leaves.

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Why did the girl fall off of the swing? Because she didn't have any arms.

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A dyslexic man walks into a building labeled, Bra. He then thinks he has found heaven but is suprised when all that is served is beer, not milk.

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Why was the doctor unable to perform his surgery properly? Because he forgot his scalpel

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What's the difference between Jackie Chan and Bruce Lee? Bruce Lee's dead.

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How do you make a man sad? By drowning him in a Bede.

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What's worse than being dead? Nothing.

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what did the red towel and the blue towel say? Nothing because towels are inanimate objects and therefore can't talk.

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jasper walks into a bar, he sees an elephant and can't believe his eyes. he says "HORGWARSH!"

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What do you call 4 Mexicans getting into a car late at night? 3rd Shift carpooling

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My friend was waving a stick around and yelling out spells, so walked up to him and asked "You want to be Harry Potter, don't you?" He replied excitedly "Yeah!!" So i killed his parents and locked him under the stairs.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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