"luke Bastiaan" "So, whens your period?"

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Roses are red Violets are blue this doesn't rhyme i like trains.

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What happened to the man who had the most loving parents and family when he was born, had an amazing childhood which he shared with so many good friends, was loved everywhere, helped the poor, started a fundraiser for starving kids in africa, got a college education, helped a complete stranger get off his drug addiction, married a beautiful woman, bought a nice house and had 3 children who he loved dearly and spent time with as much as he possibly could, tucked them in every night and enjoyed every second of his life as if it was his last? He died.

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Person 1: Happy Halloween! Person 2: Hey, I'm Jewish

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Why couldn't the cat drink his milk? Because he didn't have a face

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Why did a guy with a lisp, v-neck, and piercings pee while sitting down? His joints hurt.

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Why did hitler kill the Jews? Because he had sever mental illnesses and anyone who thinks the holocaust is funny deserves to die a slow death.

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Whats more fun than throwing a dead baby off a cliff? Catching it with a pitchfork.

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a man gets raped. -teagan doherty-

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steves legs

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How come Pluto and Goofy are both dogs, but Goofy can talk and Pluto can't? Goofy sold Pluto into slavery in exchange for the power of human speech.

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Yo momma is so ugly that shes been taking self acceptance classes for her very low self esteem which is only one of many side affects shes had from years of bad relationships and being told she was and infact still is horrifically ugly its a truly sad thing and being the child of her you should be ashamed that you have not worked to help raise her self esteem

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Q:Want to hear a pizza joke? A: Never mind it's to cheesy.

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Terry was always struggling with mathematics. On his last report card he received a D- in math. His parents were naturally very upset with him because they knew their son could do much better and so did Terry. Terry wanted to make his parents proud so he buckled down and started studying on a regular basis. Terry realized his had work had payed off when his 3rd grade teacher handed him his report card. Terry had revived an A in math! On his walk home from school all he could think about was how proud his mom and dad were going to be. On that walk home Terry was savagely torn apart by an escaped lion from the local zoo. His head was never found.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? To get to KFC.

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a jew, a muslim and a christian all walk into a bar; because of the difference in religion im afraid such an event is unlikely to occur in the future.

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What happened to the guy that got a perfect score on his S.A.T.'s? He was murdered.

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Kevin+Sean sitting in a tree enjoying mcdonald's free wifi.

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What do you call a man with a black head, a red body, white arms and yellow legs? To get to the other side.

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What did the waffle say when the black guy started eating him? Nothing, because waffles are inanimate objects and therefore cannot talk.

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Why didn't you return my call? Cause I F@%Kin Hate you!...And Just wanted to tell you in person....

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Why did the man commit a serious crime? Because he couldn't think of any funny crimes.

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A girl asks her mother, "Mummy, why am i called Rose?" "Because when you were 1 day old a rose petal landed on your head." Another girl asked her mother, "Mummy, why am i called Daisy?" "Because when you were 1 day old a daisy landed on your head" "alualualualalughghphphpphphp" "Shut up fridge"

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Wanna hear a joke about my penis? Oh wait; it would be quite unsanitary to talk about my genitals in front of you.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops