Romney 2012

thumb_up thumb_down +29

Jingle bells, batman smells, robin laid an egg.

thumb_up thumb_down +17

What happens when you are caught in the serious offense of killing somebody with intent? You get in trouble.

thumb_up thumb_down +13

Q: Ask me if I'm a tree. A: No, I am not a tree.

thumb_up thumb_down +19

Why did the todler fall over? He's an iraqi child and has ben shot inboth legs being readied fro public excution for fighting on the opposing side a.w. j.p.

thumb_up thumb_down +16

Why did the plane crash? Because the pilot was a loaf of bread.

thumb_up thumb_down +15

Why did a monkey fall out of a tree? He was dead. Why did the second monkey fall out of a tree? Gravity. Why did the third monkey fall out of a tree? He was stapled to the second monkey.

thumb_up thumb_down +19

What jew get for christmas? Your money.

thumb_up thumb_down +13

How many babies does it take it to feed a grown man? It depends on the size of the man, how hungry he is and how big the babies are.

thumb_up thumb_down +1

What do you call 10 dead babies in a blender? A horrible, horrible child abuse incident.

thumb_up thumb_down -22

What did the monkey say to the garbage collector? Eiiiiijajajaajaja EIIIIJAAA

thumb_up thumb_down +33

What's wrong with your hand!!!!!???? nothing.

thumb_up thumb_down -4

A priest, a rabbi, and a minister are in a boat in the middle of the lake when a lightning bolt flashes out of the sky and hits them. Fortunately, no one died because only about 10% of those struck are killed.

thumb_up thumb_down -7

A man asked another man what he was doing the next day. The man then proceeded to tell him that he had not intended on having any plans due to the fact that he was planning on killing himself within the next twenty three hours.

thumb_up thumb_down +15

A black man, a hispanic man, and an asian man all walk into a biker bar. The bartender asks them if they know that this is a biker bar. All three say yes and tell the bartender that they are in the same motorcycle club. The bartender serves them a beer.

thumb_up thumb_down -38

what did the girl say after she got hit by a bus, nothing she was dead

thumb_up thumb_down -1

A man is in a bar with a drink A lorry driver come in a gulp the guys drink down The man starts crying the lorry driver says"don't cry I will buy you another" The guy says "it's not that: Today I woke up late for work and when I finally got there my boss fired me so I get in my car to go home and it wont start so I walk home while it's raining and when I got in I found that my wife was sleeping with the gardener so I came down here and asked for some poison and you went and drank it"

thumb_up thumb_down +37

What's the difference between me and you? Dr. Dre

thumb_up thumb_down +45

What is 69? A two digit number.

thumb_up thumb_down +23

Your brother is so ugly that sometimes he gets teased at schools and comes home crying.

thumb_up thumb_down -16

Q. Why was the cat brown? A. because it was a maori

thumb_up thumb_down -32

What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? Finding half a worm.

thumb_up thumb_down +27

The NBA lockout

thumb_up thumb_down +35

How do you stop a pedophile from following you? Throw a fridge at him

thumb_up thumb_down -6

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops