What do I do with all the wheelchairs after I boil all the vegetables?

Why did the princess kiss the frog? She really wanted a wart.

A guy who plays shooting games acquires an assault rifle but he doesn't kill anyone, why? Because he was a nice and peaceful man who loves his wife.

What's the difference between a dead baby and a Ferrarri? A dead baby is a non-living human, while a Ferrarri is a brand of car.

A van drives into a car.

Why did the blonde go to business school? She wanted to get into business, and decided that a business degree was a good place to begin.

say it aloud and fast: •im sofa king stew ped •ice bank mice elf •alpha Q •mike hunt •mike ock

Man walks into Malaysian Airlines "Hey, can I have the next flight to--" "This is our only policy! You pay the fare we pick the where."

A man was chopping wood, he then brought the wood to his house and lit a fire.

Whats the difference between a pizza and a Jew. The pizza doesn't scream in the fire

Why did the pirate say to the donkey? Rrrrrrrrrrr you a donkey?

What's the difference between a Jew and a canoe? One is a type of small aquatic craft, and the other is a human being who practices Judaism.

How do you make a plumber cry You kill it's family

Why did the black guy enjoy anal sex? Because he has a phobia of vaginas and only likes to have anal

What's the difference between Santa clause and the Jews? Santa goes down the chimney

Why is the world round? Because oranges are purple.

what did the little boy see when he walked into his parents bed room a bed

I'm a poet and I just didn't realise

Michael Castillo is gay

who let the dogs out my mom because they're fat and need exercise

Why did grandpa climb the phone pole with bananas in a backpack? He has a debilitating disease. He is slowly losing touch with reality.

HOLY SHIT!!!!

Why was the Asian man told to open his eyes? He was sleeping.

Whats the hardest part of eating a vegetable? The wheelchair.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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