What is the reward for the pimp who banged a bitch? HIV

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Why did sally fall off the wings? She had no arms Knock knock Who's there NOT SALLY HAHAHAHA LOVE YOU JK

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You decide, drink or drive. But don't do all 3 at the same time.

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"hey woody can i ask you a question" "sure buzz" "why is it your name is woody but they use me as a vibrator"

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What does a cookie and the twin towers have in common? They both crumble.

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Q: What Did Batman Say To Robin When They Got In The Car? A: Get In The Car

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why are their no mexicans in hell they all jumped the border

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Why did the old man fall down the stairs and died? Because he had a stroke and never got life alert!

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Roses Are red violets are blue I HAVE FIVE FINGERS THE MIDDLE IS FOR U

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why does the pie have apples in it? it was apple pie.

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What did Osama bin Laden say to the Navy SEALS? Nothing. There was insufficient time to hold a conversation before they shot him in the face.

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Roses are red Violets are blue I have a gun Get in the van

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Q. On a scale of 1-100, how immature are you? A. 69.

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A boat drowns in the middle of the water. Everyone dies except for an Asian guy. Why did he live? Because he could swim.

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What's the difference between a radio and a bowl of potato salad? If you put batteries on a radio you can turn it on and listen to some music. If you put batteries on a bowl of potato salad it's not gonna give you any music.

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Out of all the sadness and death in the world...do you know what the worst part is? Mexicans are still hoping the border...

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Knock Knock. Not home.

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Man goes to the doctors, He waits patiently in the waiting room for nine minutes and is then called in to see the doctor for a routine check up. After seeing the doctor he picks up his sisters kid from school and carries on with his day.

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What's worse than a dead baby? What a sick question. Most would argue that nothing is worse than the death of an infant.

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whats wores than eating a vag. a gaint vag eating you.

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Two scientists walk into a bar. The first scientist says, "I'll have some H2O." The second scientist says, "I'll have H2O too." The bartender gives them both water, realizing that H2O2 is poisonous and that the second scientist must have simple worded his request poorly.

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Asians

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Yeah your point? Anyway, so then the brain surgeon goes: I have have cut into thousands of brains, and never seen a single thought.

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Roses are red, violets are blue, I have to go to the bathroom

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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