Why couldn't Hellen Keller watch TV? Because at 19 months she contracted what is believed to be scarlet fever which caused an acute congestion of the stomach and brain which caused her to loose sight and hearing.

toby limbers is gonna follow in his uncles footsteps, the gay ones

A woman gets on a bus with her baby. The bus driver says: "That's the ugliest baby that I've ever seen." The woman goes to the rear of the bus and sits down, fuming. She says to a man next to her, "That driver just insulted me!" The man says, "You go right up there and tell him off! Go ahead, I'll hold your monkey for you."

Suicide isn't the answer, it's just the solution. -by Ross

Looking's for free... Touching's for free.

What do you say to a cat with a helmet on? Silly cat, you rhyme with hat but you shouldn't wear one.

A mushroom walks into a bar and the bartender says "We don't serve your kind here." and then the mushroom walks out.

Q. What did the pedophile get when he went to jail? A. Exactly what he wanted.

A white man and a black man play a game of basketball, who wins? It depends who's better

How do you make sure a kangaroo gets the right breakfast? Make sure it doesn't get the wrong breakfast

YO MAMA SO SHORT she should really consider wearing long tunic-like blouses, prints that contain vertical stripes, and heeled shoes with a pointed toe in order to create the illusion of length to her silhouette. That having been said, society's limited definition of beauty is quite inadequate for the diverse and progressive world in which we live.

What's hard when you eat a vegetable? The wheelchair.

What do you call a hamburger with nothing inside of it? A virgin.

I'm gay Mr Goodwin

If file gives you melons, you might be dyslexic

So a man walks into a bar and he says "Can i have two beers?" The bartender says "Sure, Budweiser or Heineken?" The man responds "Uhmm... which one do you prefer?" The bartender says "Heineken."

a man walked into a bar and ordered a beer. The Bartender says okay, here you go.

Why couldn't Dumbo fly? Because he had just been killed by an African Poacher, and dead elephants can't fly. This is very sad.

What's green and eats nuts? Syphilis.

Can anyone Lenin money?

Frog-why did the chicken cross the road Chicken-dont judge me...

What was the latino gardener doing? Working hard to keep his job in these tough economic times.

How do you save the world in 2012? You aren't. 2012 isn't going to happen!

Why did the drunk driver get into an accident? It was a woman.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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