A baby seal walks into a club.

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A: u wanna die? B: does anyone really wanna die, i mean logistically, un-less u are suicidal, why would you wanna die? A: I do wanna die. B: ur a freak and you should consider getting help person A never got help, on his way to getting help at a certified physician he got hit by a bus, his body can be found at the intersection of church ave. and flatbush. And i would say rest in piece but cars drive over him daily, and thats not to peaceful

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A woman walks out of the kitchen, she gets slapped by her sexist husband.

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Why was it really gross when the blonde dove into the swimming pool? Because the swimming pool was full of phlegm!

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Q: What did the black man do at KFC? A: nothing, he ate dinner at home.

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What happened to Kanye West when he interrupted a KKK ritual meeting? He was promptly hung from a tree for being a negro.

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Whats better than finding a hot girl in your room? nothing

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Why are black people so stupid an lazy? They aren't. This is a negative social stigma and if you believe it you are a racist.

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XD Okay then, just a little and I am not very fond of it, I mean I tried something called tekken but that just made me nauseus. Then I got into some car racing game years ago, RidgeRacer I think, but when I moved the car to the sides, I kinda involuntarily tilted to the sides, and ended up smacking on the ground a couple of times.

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How did Elmo get his show? Because the kids loved his furry ass and hoped to be on with dorthy

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Oh yeah... You're mute.

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A man calls customer service. A man in India helps him with his problem.

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What do you call a magic owl? HOODINI only some will get it...

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Why are Jewish men circumcised? Because it is the norm with that particular religious group to circumcise male infants shortly after birth.

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whats funny? small ginger girls who die there head red, then it turns ginger again

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a man walks into a bar. he gets a beer and talks to his friends. he then goes home.

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42

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A baby tastes grapefruit juice for the first time. She is allergic and immediately begins convulsing and dies.

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John has 32 candy bars. He eats 28. What does he have now? Diabetes. John has diabetes.

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Why did a white man get kicked out of the Olympics 2012¿ Because he did not have down syndrome

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If you have 12 apples and I have 12 ice cubes how many pancakes fit on a roof? Purple because aliens don't wear hats.

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why did nick kiss esther because he cheated

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A woman walks into a bar and asks the bartender for a drink The bartenders says no, because she is a woman, and he is a sexist Women are still not equally treated in this world

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a guy walks into the bedroom with a duck in his arms, his wife is in bed half nakid. he then coments out loud this is the pig im f**king. his wife says huny your holding a duck. then he with a serious look on his face says im sory i wasent talking to you

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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