Person A: I think your father might be a thief, I'm not sure though. Person B: How come? person A: I cannot find my virginity. Person B: I apologize my dad taught me well.

When did joseph the deer learn to fly? - Never, deer can't fly

What did the husband say when his wife startled him as she appeared coming out of the kitchen? You scared me.

Why did the Jew pick up the penny? Because he dropped it

What does the man do to his meat? He beats it.

What did the Scorpio say to the Aquarius? "How's Uranus? Ohhhhh!" The Aquarius replied: "I have maggots."

Why is Short Circuit the best movie ever made? Because it tastes like lemons

Robin get in the batmobile!

Your mum is so dead, when I kick her she doesn't move.

Why did the chicken cross the road? It was being disturbed by two black guys raping a young girl with leukemia

Roses are Red, They are also white, Infact nowadays with cross-pollination a hugely diverse number of different coloured roses are attainable.

In the middle of english class, Little Timmy raised his hand and asked "Can I use the restroom" The english teacher said " I don't know, CAN you?" Little Timmy said "When I was using "can" I was using its secondary model form as a verbal modifier asking for permission, as opposed to expressing an ability. I thought since you were a teacher you'd know that. My bad. MAY I use the restroom?

Just admit it. one time in ur life u pretended that the floor was lava and the only way to survive was on the couch.

knock knock who's there Scott, Scott who, Scott Rollheiser stole my joke and posted it here.

DAVID.B YOU O ES 2 BAR YA TRAMP

Why can't Larry drive? Because he doesn't have his license, and his temps expired!

I took my blind grandmother to the art gallary

knock knock whose there cash! cash who i don't want any but i'd like some peanuts

What's black, white, and red all over??? A penguin in a blender.

what is the meaning of life? i dont know, but im fairly sure its not 42

a white man a black man and an asian man had a few drinks at a bar. they all died from alcohol poisoning

A man walks into a bar. He buys a drink, drinks his drink, and leaves.

KSI

Me

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...