Why did the plane crash? Because the pilot was a loaf of bread.

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A man said to his friend that he looks like his mom died. the other man started to cry due to the fact that it was acctually his dad

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my ilkshake brings all the boys in the yard. and the local health inspector's like , have you got a permit to be selling dairy beverages from a home based business?

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What do you call someone allergic to water ? Waterproof

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Who doesn't love finding money in your pocket when you go to put your pants on? a rape victim

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Why doesn't Harry have any arms? Because he's a Jew.

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What do you get when you cross an owl and a bungee cord? My ass.

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How do you get a Jewish man out of a pool? Ask him politely, for I'm sure he's a pleasant and reasonable fellow.

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A man walked into a haunted house and screamed. He had stepped on a nail.

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how do u make a baby cry? you shouldnt. Stop thinking of ways to make a kid cry... asshole.

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your mother is so heavily obese, she became one of the 60 million individuals in America who are obese today.

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THE SALAMANDER IS NOT A REPTILE! THE SALAMANDER IS NOT A REPTILE! THE SALAMANDER IS NOT A REPTILE! THE SALAMANDER IS NOT A REPTILE! THE SALAMANDER IS NOT A REPTILE! THE SALAMANDER IS NOT A REPTILE! THE SALAMANDER IS NOT A REPTILE! THE SALAMANDER IS NOT A REPTILE! THE SALAMANDER IS NOT A REPTILE! THE SALAMANDER IS NOT A REPTILE! THE SALAMANDER IS NOT A REPTILE! THE SALAMANDER IS NOT A REPTILE! THE SALAMANDER IS NOT A REPTILE! THE SALAMANDER IS NOT A REPTILE! THE SALAMANDER IS NOT A REPTILE! THE SALAMANDER IS NOT A REPTILE! THE SALAMANDER IS NOT A REPTILE! THE SALAMANDER IS NOT A REPTILE! THE SALAMANDER IS NOT A REPTILE! THE SALAMANDER IS NOT A REPTILE!

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Limericks are fun, I have an orange Nothing rhymes with orange crap orange

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A rhinoceros walks into a bar. As it felt threatened by the presence of many humans, the rhino attacks and kills several people with the big horn on its nose.

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How many times have I said the word shingles? twelve.

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In Soviet Russia a lot of people were killed for voicing their opinion against Stalin

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A horse dies and goes to heaven. He wonders why there aren't any atheists around.

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SEX

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Where did the duck hide its pail? UNDER THE STAIRS!!

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The lemons on the tree are ripe. They will be picked.

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one stop shop

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What do you get when you cross a helicopter, elephant, and a rhino? Heliphino

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Yo momma so stupid, she failed the 2nd grade math

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dead battery come on down

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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