What's worse than a worm in your apple? The Holocost

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What boy with no arms get on his birthday? Lego.

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A man walks into a bar. Ouch.

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Why are Germans good at soccer The Holocaust.

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A man walks into a bar and orders a water. He then drinks his water and leaves. The following day he returns to the bar and again orders a water. He repeats this for many days until finally one day the bartender asks him why he comes every day to just drink water. The man replies, "Water is free. I got laid off from my job last week. Rough economy, you know." The bartender starts charging him for water, and the man becomes homeless.

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Why did the farmer cross the road? To catch the chicken

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Call me Ishmael. Or don't. Well, you can, but I'm not forcing you. You could call me Steve or Bob, it's not really that important. I'm just around here anyway to tell about a huge white dick. A whale dick. A SPERM whale dick. Never mind. Or the guy whose obsessed with it. No, it's not what it sounds like. He just wants to stab it with his harpoon. Wait, that sounds even worse. Whatever. Anyway, call me Ishmael...

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? Because it was dead.

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Selena Gomez, Victoria Justice, and Arianna Grande walk into a bar. They were making a movie.

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Why was the man sad He wasnt i lied

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What is the difference between a baby and a log? I don't have a log in my fireplace

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I was not scared, I was disappointed, I was expecting to see you for you, not the whole strange outfit getup, what was the point of that? I know the deal about hypnosis and stuff, did you know it is actually known as monoideoism? But I really cant figure for the life of me how it is physically possible to be under a deep state of trance and completely awake at the same time.

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phone and phone charger were talking to each other suddenly a massive hand swopped down to the charger and another hand came down and grabbed the phone they both started screeming so the hand stabbed the phone with the phone charger so the phone said... ALL I DID WAS SCREEM (RANDOMZZZ) (L.W)

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How do you make a baby stop crying? You slit it's throat.

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The night is always darkest just before the dawn. Just kidding I'm Helen Keller, everything's always dark.

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what did batman say to robin before they got in the car get in the car

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What's big and white and wilbkill you if it falls from a tree? My dick.

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Why did the blind man drown? Because he couldn't swim.

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Q: How did Mary get frostbite A: Her mother locked her in a freezer

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Why was the woman worried? She was coughing up blood

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haha black people :D

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Chuck Norris ordered a Big Mac at Burger King. After being told politely that Big Macs were served at McDonald's and not Burger King, he walked out and drove to the nearest McDonald's.

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Real Joke: The US Air Force operates Seymour Johnson Air Force Base. It is named for a seaman. Go look it up.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

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The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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