Why is 6 afraid of 7? 6 cheated on 7 with 9.. 6 is now a victim of domestic violence.

thumb_up thumb_down -22

what do u call a newspaper boy on brake? your uncle because hes broke and struggling with income.

thumb_up thumb_down -8

This is a story of Bobbie He was fat so he got bullied at school he did not have any friends. He ate a lot and watched the television. He was called names such as big, fat, an idiot, clumsy. But he begun to realise that if he was smart, he could become rich. So he studied hard and hard, but he did not become better at it. So he thought I want to succeed in sports, so he began exercising and was on a strict diet, but nothing changed. He was still fat and unfit. Then one day he knew that he couldn't succeed. So he asked God, what is the purpose of me living, why can't I have something, maybe a talent. God replied I'm sorry but I can't give you a talent. You have to figure it out by yourself. Then Bobbie knew what his talent was. So the following morning Bobbie went to www.anti-joke.com and began writing jokes. Octopus. Bye

thumb_up thumb_down -4

Why did the Jew hate bananas? He was deathly allergic to them.

thumb_up thumb_down -1

Why was Susan tied up on the railroad tracks? Because she was a blonde and her dad told her it was a roller coaster.

thumb_up thumb_down -21

An asian walks into class to take a math test. He did not study and consistently misbehaves and promptly fails.

thumb_up thumb_down -12

what do you call a pizza with a lot of jalapenos. spicy.

thumb_up thumb_down +96

What do you call a hickey on your shoulder? Bad aim -Cooper Simpson

thumb_up thumb_down +30

Two men walk into a bar. Seeing as the first man could have suffered a concussion, and been seriously hurt, The second man ducks to avoid also being hit by the bar.

thumb_up thumb_down

Q. What is green and has wheels? A. Grass, I was joking about the wheels.

thumb_up thumb_down +3

A man walks into a bar and sees an attractive blonde. He is afraid of talking to her so he goes home and masterbates himself to sleep.

thumb_up thumb_down -9

Your mom is so ugly that she had self-esteem problems and severe depression as a teenager due to merciless bullying due to her looks, however she overcame this, found a man who loved her for who she was, and then married him. She now lives a happy life.

thumb_up thumb_down -14

Knock Knock. - Whose there? ... ... ... ... Damn kids.

thumb_up thumb_down +16

Why did the Wife cheat on her Husband? Because she was a f***ing BITCH.

thumb_up thumb_down -6

What do you get when you cross a chicken with an alligator? Go take some acid and find out for yourself

thumb_up thumb_down -39

Fine, ladies first.

thumb_up thumb_down -8

whats red, brown and blown up? a hampster in a microwave

thumb_up thumb_down -2

Q: What do you call an elephant between two buildings? A: An elephant between two buildings, and the question of how the elephant got there

thumb_up thumb_down +33

Andy Carrol

thumb_up thumb_down +1

Why did the chicken cross the road? Earlier that morning the farmer's daughter had inadvertently left the gate to the yard open as she was preoccupied by her worry over a maths test set for that day. She hadn't studied for the test as she was still deeply distressed over her fathers recent heart attack. This, coupled with the added burden of household chores now delegated to her because her mother was out trying to get the west field prepared for sowing, had made her quite forgetful and distracted of late. Whilst several chickens escaped, only one strayed so far that it actually encountered the road facing the farm. After crossing the road and gorging itself in a soy-bean crop, the chicken was struck by a furniture remover's van as it attempted to make its way home. Several hours later the dead chicken was spotted by a Community Mental Health Worker who was doing his bi-weekly rural clinic run. The chicken, being a bantam, caught the eye of the Mental Health worker, who was a keen trout fisherman. "Cool" thought the mental health worker- "those feathers will make for excellent trout flies". He stopped and plucked a handful of the most iridescent blue, green and orange feathers and placed them in an envelope. He rolled himself a cigarette, sat on the trunk of his car and admired the clouds. "God, I love this job", he muttered to no one in particular.

thumb_up thumb_down +1

Knock Knock Who's there? Ben. Ben who? Ben Dover.

thumb_up thumb_down +54

Why are Pirates called Pirates? Because the word originates from the term Pirata which means 'sea attacker' in Latin.

thumb_up thumb_down +1

A man runs over a woman wth his car. Whose fault was it? The man because he should be driving on the roads, not in the kitchen.

thumb_up thumb_down +24

What do you call a man with no arms and legs in the ocean? Dead.

thumb_up thumb_down +11

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops