i like my coffee like i like my women. without a penis

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What do you get when you cross a cow with an elephant? A deformed organism

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A mathematician, a physicist, and an engineer walk into a bar. They order some drinks, sit quietly and stare at their shoes until they've finished their drinks, then go back home and wallow in loneliness, wishing their social skills weren't so abysmal.

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Q. What did the man with no heart say? A. Nothing. No living creature can live without a heart.

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a black man has a shotgun. having an IQ of 11 he shot his hands off

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Q: Why did the chicken cross the road? A: He didn't, he died in the middle of this task.

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Why can't Helen Keller have sex? She is dead

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Why was the little boy sad? Because a stranger stole his shirt.

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Click click ,scroll scroll. Bro you wasted your time. -Troll Lord

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:D STORY TIME! :D ... :D So once upon a time there was a... :) Uhm... :\ I forgot... Sorry :(

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Why did the boy drop his ice cream. He never got an ice cream he is alergic.

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what do you say when your phone is broken? A: my phone is broken

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roses are red violets are blue I suck at poetry time for lunch :D

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Whats the difference between pizza and Jews Pizzas dont scream when their put in the oven

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How did the baby cross the road? He was stapled to the chicken

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Two hunters are out in the woods when one of them collapses. He doesn't seem to be breathing and his eyes are glazed. The other guy whips out his phone and calls the emergency services. He gasps, "My friend is dead! What can I do?" The operator says "Calm down. I can help. First, let's make sure he's dead." Then there is silence and a gun shot is heard. Back on the phone the guy says "I shot in the air and my friend heard it and moved. I think he's still alive." The operator says "Good that means he's still breathing and he's not dead."

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How do you stop a baby from crawling in circles? Pick it up and put it in a crib, like a responsible parent.

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Why did the big refrigerator fall down the cheese Because i licked my own ear and it got scared and cheese for no raiSOnsD

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Why was the light on in the house ? A. the owners were using it

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Roses are red Violets are blu Doogie is gay I have no friends

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Why isn't Neil Patrick Harris like Barney Stinson in real life? Because he's gay

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a boy meets a girl the rest is censored

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What's worse than getting struck by lightning? Getting struck while your in your house!!

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A baby seal walks into a club.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops