What's brown and sticky? A stick.

What has 9 arms and sucks? Def lepeord

why did the bus hit the kid? he dropped his ice cream.

What happens when you shoot a black man? You go to prison because murder is a criminal offense.

A man goes to the doctor and says, "Doc I feel like a pair of curtains!" The doctor replied, "That's probably because you're schizophrenic."

What's the difference between a pizza and a jew. One's a tasty delicious snack and the other one's a pizza.

What did the kid with no arms or legs get for Christmas? Cancer.

what do you get when you see jonny cry-a monkey lol

What do you call John Lennon without glasses? A skeleton, because John Lennon is dead.

Jesus walks into a hotel, slams four nails down on the counter, and says, "Put me up for the night!" The concierge looks at him and says, "You're not Jesus. Jesus was brutally murdered approximately 1,970 years ago. And although I may not be a believer, his teachings have brought comfort and solace to millions of people around the world. Nor do we accept nails as payment. Please remove yourself from the premises or I will call security."

If you're American when you go into the bathroom , and you're American when you come out of the bathroom, what are you when you're in the bathroom. Ha, joke is on you because Americans don't pee.

I had sex with my mother in law

Lil Wayne

what is the difference between the black orphan and the white orphan.... the black orphan died after i raped it

Confucius says, I hear and I forget. I see and I remember. I do and I understand.

Jesus walks into a hotel, slams four nails down on the counter, and says, "Put me up for the night!" The concierge looks at him and says, "You're not Jesus. Jesus was brutally murdered approximately 1,970 years ago. And although I may not be a believer, his teachings have brought comfort and solace to millions of people around the world. Nor do we accept nails as payment. Please remove yourself from the premises or I will call security."

What did the farmer say when he lost his tractor? Where's my tractor?

What happened when the cow jumped over the barbed wire fence? Hopefully it made it over without lacerating its underbelly, thus causing fatal bleeding.

Racist Math Ahmed is on a train from D.C to New York the train is traveling at 125 mph. the distance between New York and D.C is 250 miles. How many will die in the blast.

How do you kill a blonde? Shoot her in the head.

What is a bear's favorite televison show? It doesnt have one because it is a bear which makes watching television an illogical fallacy.

Why was the fish swimming on the water? Oh wait it's dead

Have you heard the one about the blonde and the bear? No. Me neither.

why did the Chicken Cross the Road? Why must you question a Chicken's motives to Cross the Road?

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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