Your mama's so stupid she brought syrup to the quidditch world cup because she knew there would be quaffles!

What did the grape say when it got stepped on? Nothing really, it just let out a little whine.

Chikin nuggets are cooler than your mom!!!!!!!

whats the difference between santa claus and jewish people santa claus goes down the chimney and jewish people go up

non poop

How do you turn that frown upside down? You move many muscles in your face.

what do u call an elephant in a car? nothing elephants cant fit in cars

Q. Knock knock A. Who's there Q. DEEZ A. DEEZ who A. DEEZ NUTZ HA GOT EEEEEM

roses are red violets are blue i'm allergic to pollen achoo

Whats worse than bad sex. Being nice raped in the anus by a teletubby.

Q: Why did Jesus die for our sins? A: He didn't.

Roses are red bullets are led if you don't take me back now i'll shoot you in the head!

Why did the chicken cross the road? Listen, it's a free country.

Why did the hipster burn his mouth on a piece of pizza? Because the pizza was on fire.

Two dogs went out for a walk. Then their master took them home.

what did the apple say to the orange? nothing, stupid, apples can't talk

what did the black guy say to the white guy? black guy: hello how are you doing white guy: good i guess.... just heard they shut down KFC black guy: that sucks

How many Jehovah's Witnesses does it take to screw in a light bulb? 2. One to firmly hold the ladder and the other to cautiously screw it in. They are volunteering at the local orphanage and it is wrong to make fun of there religion. We are all different in our own special way. ernkso

Why is Stevie Wonder called Stevie Wonder? Wonder where I am.

Why does the girl get humped by a pig? Because she has sexual needs and no other more attractive animal, including an human wants to hump her.

Q: Whats worse than finding a worm in your apple? A: Getting raped

Q:What's the difference between my refrigerator and the trunk of my car? A: There isn't a spare tire in my refrigerator.

What is black and blue? A pen with reversable ink.

How do you fit four gay on a bar stool? Divide the given space into fourths and convince them to share it accordingly. However, due to the fact that bar stools are significantly smaller than the average chair, and the likelihood that the bar has the resources to provide chairs for all of their customers, it would be highly unlikely that the men would choose be remain seated in such an inconvenient manner.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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