How many Jews can you fit in to a car? Well depending on the car 2-8

thumb_up thumb_down -26

a robber walks into a bank. he steals everything and kills the guards

thumb_up thumb_down -29

What time is it? It depends in your location and time zone

thumb_up thumb_down -12

Knock Knock Whose there? Lemons Lemons who? The fruit

thumb_up thumb_down +37

Knock knock! "It's unlocked"

thumb_up thumb_down +45

Why was the black person assassinated behind a drug dealers house? He was purposely shot in the leg and bled out before he could make it to help.

thumb_up thumb_down -5

What would George Washington say if he were alive? "Help! im stuck in a coffin!"

thumb_up thumb_down +14

a man dyslexic into bar walks a

thumb_up thumb_down -2

What is white, sticky and tastes great? Milk

thumb_up thumb_down +5

Fill in the blank: A ______ is a man's best friend. Jake: Is it dog? Host: YES! Now for the 1 million dollars! Finish the sentence: I just saved a lot of money by Jake: Switching to Geico? Host: Sorry, that's incorrect. The correct answer is "I just saved a lot of money by not spending it on useless junk and by budgeting my account towards investing in the future." Oh well, nice try.

thumb_up thumb_down +30

Can God do anything even if it's impossible? Yes. Can God make a rock so heavy he can't lift it? Yes. Can he lift that rock? Yes. Then he just failed at making a rock so heavy he can't lift it

thumb_up thumb_down -4

why do ducks have webbed feet? to stomp out fires. why do elephants have flat feet? to stomp out the burining ducks.

thumb_up thumb_down -12

What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? Thousands upon thousands upon thousands of dying infants.

thumb_up thumb_down +38

How do you stop a black kid from bouncing on the bed? Put Velcro on the cealing.

thumb_up thumb_down +9

What did the paralyzed kid get for his 18th birthday? A boner.

thumb_up thumb_down -4

Why do black people have white palms? Genetics.

thumb_up thumb_down -18

What's sicker than "Friday" by Rebecca Black? Hitler's kill death ratio

thumb_up thumb_down -14

What has 4 eyes and can't see. Blind siamese twins!

thumb_up thumb_down +51

What has two wings and a halo? A chinese phone. WING WING HALO?

thumb_up thumb_down +37

whats funny about a jew burning? Nothing......

thumb_up thumb_down +16

Lewis

thumb_up thumb_down +8

Yo Mama just died.

thumb_up thumb_down -28

1500 Jews were ordered to walk along a straight path whilst in the midst of a blizzard. How close did they ever get to the end? What end? They marched until every last bit of their rotten flesh was driven from their weak bodies. --ZeNaziGermanDoctor

thumb_up thumb_down +4

what do you call an octopus with 9 tentacles? a male octopus

thumb_up thumb_down +7

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops