What's worse than biting into an apple and finding a worm? Being the worm.

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Q: What did the police officer tell the man without a shirt on? A: Put a shirt on.

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Why was the duck in jail? For Smoking...Quack!!

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Do you know what a lion really is? It's an over sized cat.

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What did the peach say to the apple? Nothing. Peaches can't talk.

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A guy walks into a bar. No one notices he has epilepsy.

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What's the difference a ham and bugs bunny? -When I see a ham on the dinner table, I eat it. When I see bugs bunny on the dinner table and asks me "what's up, doc?" I stay away from sugar for a while and get tested for heroin

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Yo mama is so fat!

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Yo mamma's so fat, she's self-concsious about her weight and is embarassed when people make fun of her weight which makes her escape to her only friend, food, which makes her even fatter, so she will never lose weight until society accepts her and is not so prejudice towards overweight people.

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What did the red paint say to the blue paint? They said nothing. Paints don't talk and you need to see a doctor if you answered anything else.

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What happened when the Asian girl got an 89 on her Test? Her parents kicked her out of their house.

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a homeless man walks into a bar, the bartender and patrons treat him nicely, and sympathize for his current situation.

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text this number 2066191208 saying i wanna rape you

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Whats brown and sticky? A Stick.

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What did the salad say to the dressing? Nothing! Carrots don't talk!

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Roses are red, Violets are blue I'm Schizophrenic and so am I

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The early bird gets the worm, but the angry bird gets the pig.

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Whats long, hard, and filled with seaman... a mans penis

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Yo mama's so poor she is on welfare.

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-Knock, Knock -Who's there? -Carl -Carl wh-wait... carl...CARL OH MY GOD!!!! WE ALL THOUGHT YOU WERE DEAD ,CARL!!!! Where have you been? Oh my god... Mom's DEAD! When we all thought you were dead she hung herself! IT'S YOUR FAULT SHE'S DEAD, CARL! YOUR FAULT!!!!!! YOU ARE AN UNGRATEFUL PIECE OF SHIT CARL! YOU KNOW THAT? I hope you burn in hell.

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What did the handicapped boy say to his mother? Nothing, his severe mental retardation impaired his ability to learn the English language.

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a short man asked a tall man "hey hows the weather up there"? the tall man couldnt answer cause he was sucked up by a tornado that missed the short man

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Chuck Norris Isn't That tuff if he was he would come to my house and slam my head in they keyboaredehfiu;qbg;qebnuighqije9qp8ubwrsijpa

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Roses are Blue Violets are Red I have Alsheimers... Cheese on Toast

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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