What did one duck say to the other? Well, it said "Quack" but it's not certain if it was actually addressing the other duck or if it was just making a noise in response to some other stimulus.

why did the midget beat the basketball player in a foot race? the basketball player got bit by a scorpion and died within minutes.

All I can say is that its not the feds, and not Interpol nothing "legal" nor anything belonging to the state as far as we can tell. You all stay locked up, and I will make sure this little geek with shitty breath does not say anything about you, as for the rest, I cant say much.

What has four legs but can't walk? A tranquilized bear

Q. Why did the lotion soothe the person's skin? A. Because its ingredients were selected because of their propensity to soothe skin.

i am a dino. RAWR.

If woman that have big breasts work at Hooters, then do woman with one leg work at Ihop?

In soviet russia...the abundance of natural oils and rich agricultural land provide it with a thriving economy

Roses are red, Violets are microwaves, I have amnesia, Roses are red.

John: Knock Knock! Bill: Who's there John: John Bill: Oh hey John, come in

this website is non-operational.

What did the alien say to the other alien? It's hard to say. They could use an inefficient form of aural analog communication, or a hyper-advanced form of telepathy. Either way, modern science hasn't brought us far enough to determine.

roses are red and violets are blue so is your mums fanny

Q: Why did the turtle cross the road? A: Doesn't matter, got hit by car.

A homeless guy on the brink of starvation found one dollar lying on the street. He took it and bought a lottery ticket at the local drugstore. God was looking down on him with pity that day and decided that day that he would no longer be a vagabond. The next day, the homeless man won the lottery jackpot, worth 100 million dollars. He declared that on that day, he was the luckiest and happiest man alive. He then woke up in a pile trash.

What did the homosexual say to the purse walking down the street? - I'm a homosexual.

what do you call a man with no arms or legs? numerous abusive terms as you kickk him to death.

Why did the chicken cross the road? Who cares?

What's the difference between a Lamborghini and a pile of dead babies? I don't have a Lamborghini in my garage.

Why did Johnny fall down? Because I threw tropical fruit at him.

Whats blue and white and red all over? The American flag

a man ran into a bar screaming. he now has a severe coma

once upon a time, it snowed

Q: Why can you not thumb up your own comment? A: "You've already voted" douche...

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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