what meows and is fuzzy and smells like manure? a cat being being killed with a chainsaw next to a cow

Why do monkeys fly with their wings? Because Elephants tend to run out of battery.

I'm not unemployed. I'm on sabbatical. Hey! Don't get all religous on me.

why did the chicken cross the road? It was running from the black man

What did the pregnant 16 year old get for her birthday? A miscarriage

What happens when you yell at people who have high blood pressure? They might get heart attacks & die.

Agent 47.

A panda bear walks into a bar. The bartender then alerts the zoo of the whereabouts of their missing panda.

4

Is your friend gay? Yeah, duh, of course he's happy.

What's black and white and red all over? A mime lying in a pool of blood.

That's a rhetorical question chickens don't cross roads!

Two parrots were sitting next to each other. One parrot said "hey" The other parrot replied "hey" therefore making the first parrot say "hey" which made the other parrot say "hey" again making the... this conversation, comprised of just one word lasted a very long time. aproximately 16749 hours.

Roses are Red Voilets are Red I am Red I am Dead

Q: What does Osama Bin Laden's dead body and a sea sponge have in common? A: Nothing. One was buried in respectful accordance with Islamic law and the other is an animal of the phylum Porifera that's incapable of murdering thousands of innocent persons.

roses are red violets are blue get out of my face before i kill you

Why couldn't Helen Keller drive? Because she was blind.

What do lazy asses get for Christmas? Fat

What's the difference between a bunch of slaves and a porsche? A: i don't have porsche in my basement

Why did a little boy have a black eye? Because his father is very abusive to him and his sister. They are beaten every dad after the father comes home drunk from the bar because his wife also the kids mother died in a car acciedent 1 month before this. Child abuse is not funny and neither is a dead mother.

roses are red violets are blue count my five damn finger , and the third one is for you!!!!!!!!

so today, i was walking along, and i noticed that it was sunny outside.

You're walking down a street and you see a man struggling to open a door, what do you do? Whatever you feel like doing.

Why did the chicken cross the road? To get to the other side.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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