Roses are red, Violets are blue this poem sucks, GET OVER IT -brett

Why did the Indian have a hard time getting a hotel room? He didn't. He owned the hotel.

What do you get when you cross a baby and a chainsaw? Life imprisonment.

What did the woman find when she got home from the post office? Her son's corpse hanging from a clothes hanger. She was an abusive mom, and he killed himself.

How do Yankees fans cheer for their favorite sports team? Let's go Yankees!

A priest and a Rabbi walk into a bar, but they're wearing normal people clothes, so no one notices or says anything funny.

A priest, a jew, and a pirate walk into a bar. An exchange of dialogue occurs with the bartender and hilarity ensues.

what do you call a man without an umbrella? wet

Knock Knock Knock Knock Knock Knock Knock Knock Meanwhile in the basement...an elderly man, who lives a lone and whose children lead their own lives and dont have much time for him, lies on the ground unable to move after having falling down the stairs. He has been there for 2 days. He is frightened and confused, he hears someone knocking and his hopes perk up, he tries to call but due to lack of water his mouths is too dry to do so. He sobs in frustration. Knock Knock [Silence] The old man cries, aware of his fate.

Your mother is so fat, that making fun if her is a terrible thing to do.

What does a Cuban do when he gets a flat tire? He pulls over and replaces it.

Did you hear about the peanut that was assaulted? He filed a police report weeks ago and is upset by the sluggish nature of the justice system.

roses are red, violets are blue. hey.

What succeeds most of the time? The population of a field with grass.

What's worse than finding 7 dead babies in a bin? Finding one is missing.

How do you tell if a politician is lying? You make him take a polygraph test.

A black man and a Mexican are in the back of a car, who's driving? Their father Micheal, he adopted both of them from a mentally handicapped orphanage when they were five.

A man was feeling sick and decided to go and see a doctor. He saw the doctor and then went home. He wasn't feeling any better so he decided to get checked-out by the doctor.

What do you call a smart blond? A golden retriever!

Why doesn't Susie have a bike? She has no arms. Who pushed Johnny off a cliff? Definitely not Susie.

why did the woman leave her husband? after years of mental and physical abuse she has decided to remove herself from the situation

What's the difference between a blonde and a brunette? The pigmentation of their hair follicles.

a man walks into a bar... his drinking problem is seriously affecting his family

Q: What did the man with no arms and no legs receive for Christmas? A: Cancer

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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