What do you call three mexicans in a bowl of soup? Whatever their respective names might happen to be.

Doctor, Doctor, I feel like there's two of me! There's not. Your long lost twin died of terminal cancer.

Whats worse than ants in your pants? Uncles.

What did the radiator say to the carpet? Nothing, a radiator is an inanimate object, and therefore is unable to speak.

Why did the man complain of pain in his ankle? Because several consecutive tissue samples of the area revealed a rapidly metastasizing neoplasm. Blood samples indicated the presence of what appeared to be Hodgkins Lymphoma. The man was very wealthy, however, and had world class doctors treat him. He then donated a vast portion of his wealth to research. 12% of the donated money went into studying the medicinal effects of Twinkies.

Why did the baby crawl onto the road? because a sick bastard put a bottle of milk there knowing that a bus would be going through that route soon.

Why didn't the 34 year old woman fit into some size 14 jeans? Because she was size 16.

A priest, a rabbi and a scientologist walk into a bar. They discuss their various religious viewpoints until the scientologist gets a call informing him of his mother's death. The priest buys him a drink. Then the priest gets a call informing him of his mothers death. The rabbi buys him a drink. The rabbi gets a call. The scientologist expects it to be about the rabbi's mother dying, so he prematurely buys him a drink. It was actually the lottery commission telling the rabbi he won 48 million dollars.

What do you call a lot of Chinese people in a confined place? A Chinese urban center.

Who the heck do you think you are?! Ally...duh

what does chicken and triceratops have in common both their jokes are anti-climatic, from lack of punchline

A Mexican, A Jew and a Irishman walk into a grocery store...The Mexican buys some bread, the Jew buys some bread... and the Irishman buys some bread.

What's the Capitol of Washington dc? W

Roses are black Violets are black I'm Helen Keller Everything's black

In Soviet Russia my freedoms are severally restricted by communism.

Q: What's worse than 6 dead babies in a trash can? A: One dead baby in 6 trash cans.

person 1: Did you hear about the black man that went to college? Person 2: no i haven't Person 1: either have I What's ironic is that they are both black

What do you call a pregnant 8-year old? A poor reflection on our society

What's the difference between ten dead babies and a Ferrari. A Ferrari isn't in my garage.

A man walked into a bar. Too bad he didn't see it.The man was sent to the hospital 2 hours later when a friendly elderly lady found him badly wounded on the ground.

What's white and likes to likes to take frequent jogs? Stephen Hawkings, I meant so say remain motionless

Q: What did Hitler say to the Rabbi? A: I don't like you.

what's the difference between a blue fridge falling off a cliff and a yellow one? the yellow one isn't falling of a cliff.

Why didn't little jimmy take out the trash? He is a rock

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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