How many surrealists does it take to screw in a light bulb? Yarn

Where was the Declaration of Independence signed? At the bottom.

my friend is gay hes gay

*Hands women baby* Women: Hes so beatiful! I'm going to love him forever! Doctor: Its not yours, yours died.

Women are only good for two things... Being raped and being raped in the ass.

What's the difference between a Jew and a pizza? A Jew is a person who adheres to the Jewish faith and claims a cultural or ancestral connection to the Jewish people, and a pizza is an oven-baked, flat, disc shaped bread usually topped with tomato sauce and mozzarella and then a selection of meats, depending on taste and culture.

How many calories are in a bag of Fritos? 160 calories.

knock knock Who's there? Me Me who? Me Doa Kong Oh, Hi! Come on in.

Question to make it sound like a racist joke? Politically correct answer that should not offend anyone.

A B C D E F G.... Gummy bears are chasing me 1 is red, 1 is blue 1 is tryin to steal my shoe now i'm running for my life cuase the red 1 has a knife

what do you call cheese that isn't yours? not your cheese, you probably stole it.

What's funnier than British people ? Their tea in the Harbor

What did the black kid get for Christmas? An X-box, a sweater and some socks.

Y did the boy fall down the stairs???? He was In a wheel chair

Ask me what my favorite color is. What's you favorite color? Blue.

Christianity is not a religion; it's a relationship with God.

Why are spanish people good at soccer? Hard work and a long-life time comitment

wanna hear a joke? asians with t i t s

what did the astronomer say when he lost his telescope? where is my telescope?

Two muffins are sitting on a counter. One muffin says to the other "hello." The other muffin says "Oh my god a talking muffin!"

Q: Why does it take three Polacks to change a light bulb? A: Because they're so damn stupid.

your mom is so ugly when she entered an ugly contest they said... ok

There is a Asian a black guy and a white guy the black guy loves apples the white guy loves pears and the Asian loves Macaroni the white guy gets a apple the black guy gets a pear and the Asian has no lunch so the black guy kills the white guy for the apple and the Asian kills the black guy because he is hungry

How do you make sushi if you are a fish? Commit suicide and sell yourelf to a sushi resturant!

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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