Q: What is red and smells like blue paint? A: Red paint.

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How did the man with no arms or legs cross the street? He didn't.

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Why did the woman leave the kitchen? Because she didn't want to be late for work.

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What did Niel Patrick Harris do after coming out of the closet? He grabbed his jacket and went for a delightful stroll in the park.

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Sweet! I've just received my free minecraft giftcode! >> Minecraftcodes.info <

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I went to buy some camouflage shorst the other day but I couldn't find any.

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What is the longest word in the English language? SMILES: there is a mile between the first and last letters!"

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Why did the car get out of bed? Because the person who owned the car was a total freak and put the car into a bed.

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Why was six afraid of seven? It wasn't. Numbers are not sentient and thus incapable of feeling fear.

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Why did the Flyers lose to the Blackhawks in the Stanley Cup? Because they aren't as good as the Blackhawks.

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Has anyone told you, you look fat today?" "Because you don't.

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A man runs over a woman with his car, whose fault was it? The woman's for trying to cross the street in the dark without a crosswalk.

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What is James Miller's real name? James Miller.

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What do call a man with a daranged wife? Married

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A man walked into a bar 2 hours later he died from drinking and driving

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What did the prisoner say to the other prisoner? I am going to anally rape you.

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Roses are red, Violets are blue. I have a gun. Get in the van.

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Q: Do these jeans make me look fat? A: No your fat makes you look fat.

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WTF? If you look at life from the right, you might just see whats left, and just then I looked down at the midget as he said "Yo whats up?" I told him, hey do you like left? He said! DAAAAAMN RIIIIIGHT! I spent a while just standing there wondering what the hell was happening into my life, it was so right it was left and wrong... NeroMetal (No fucking idea what Neronism is, I just play streetfighter V and type books that confuse people)

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Why was the little boy crying? Because a stranger shoved explosives up his butthole.

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What's the difference between a zebra and a newspaper? Everything.

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47

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Roses are Blue Violets are Red I have Alsheimers... Cheese on Toast

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What's worse than a fly in your soup? Cancer.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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