why did the mokey fall out of the tree because it was dead.

thumb_up thumb_down +10

Friends, they're like food. If you eat them, they die.

thumb_up thumb_down -2

What's the difference between a pile of dead babies and a Corvette? What? I don't have a Corvette in my garage Wanna hear something gross? Sure. 1 at the bottom is still alive. Wanna hear something grosser? Yea. It's eating its way out

thumb_up thumb_down -19

A black man, a chinese man, and a dog decide to have a race. Unfortunately, they are shot by a sniper on a roof while still in the planning stages.

thumb_up thumb_down -38

Knock, Knock. Who's there? Dave. Dave who? Dave proceeds to break into tears as his grandmother's Alzheimers has progressed to the point where she can no longer remember him.

thumb_up thumb_down +13,644

What has 4 eyes and cant see? Mississippi

thumb_up thumb_down -17

Why did the chicken cross the road? We will never know. Chickens are incapable of communicating with humans and thus the intent of the chicken is subject to speculation.

thumb_up thumb_down +30

5 people are walking

thumb_up thumb_down +16

What is big and white, not the moon CC

thumb_up thumb_down +25

what do you get when you cross a joke with a rhetorical question ................

thumb_up thumb_down -3

What's the difference between a black man and a bag of crap? Quite a bit. The black man is a human male of the Kingdom Animalia, while the bag is an inanimate object. The only similarity between them would be that they both contain organic matter.

thumb_up thumb_down -41

Okay, an ambulance is arriving for me (cops called it whatever I am fine) If you are still reading this then get the fuck out before I fire you no more messages.

thumb_up thumb_down -19

If an old person falls in the middle of the woods do they make a sound? No their died.

thumb_up thumb_down +13

What is a panda bear? A bear with black and white fur.

thumb_up thumb_down +29

there were two cyclists cycling at a steady pace down a main road in china, one irish and the other chinese. now they happened to be cycling at exactly the same time and exactly the same pace. so why did the irish cyclist get pulled over and the chinese not? because the irish cyclist had in fact brutally raped and murdered a young child in his home town and then fled the country to china.

thumb_up thumb_down -19

BBC have a new porn channel. C Boobies...

thumb_up thumb_down -13

What's the difference between an elephant and a moscito? There are several differencies. Firstly, the elephant is a mammal and the moscito is an insect.

thumb_up thumb_down -5

i have a six pack.... of crayons......... just kidding i ate two of them

thumb_up thumb_down +39

Roses are red, Violets are blue. I have a gun. Get in the van.

thumb_up thumb_down +17,367

There once was a man from Nantucket I raped him. The End.

thumb_up thumb_down +29

On her day off, a fully clothed stripper walks into a bar she's never been to before. The regulars turn their heads to see who has just walked in, then turn back to their own conversations.

thumb_up thumb_down +6

That moment where the screen shouts "HE MAN" And you look at the guy and go... Hmm did they say He-Man or She-Man? HE MAN!

thumb_up thumb_down +34

how do you know a chinese person has been in your house? #1 your homework is done #2 your computer is upgraded #3 when you get home there still pulling out of your driveway

thumb_up thumb_down +5

you cant spell slaughter withought laughter

thumb_up thumb_down -19

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops