once upon a time, a bird fell in love with a fish.. they both died.

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Your Mom.

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Lisa: Omg Karen, just had sex with Ben, his weiner was sooo tiny lol. Ben: I think you sent me the wrong text.

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A horse walked into a bar. Several people got up and left as they spotted the potential danger in the situation.

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Yo momma is so ugly that shes been taking self acceptance classes for her very low self esteem which is only one of many side affects shes had from years of bad relationships and being told she was and infact still is horrifically ugly its a truly sad thing and being the child of her you should be ashamed that you have not worked to help raise her self esteem

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What's worse than finding half a worm in your apple? Being cut in half by a human while you were trying to eat an apple

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Why did the little boy cry? His entire family was shot and killed at his elementary school play.

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whats green and has wings ? a flying patch of astro turf

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Hey, austin, what are you doing?

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Why did the prince kiss his beloved just before going into battle? Intermission.

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Roses are Red ?And sometimes yellow ? My mother is mellow ? Billy you have cancer ?

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Why did the chicken cross the road? The cognitive capacity of the chicken is significantly underdeveloped in comparison to humans; thus, comprehending a chicken's motives is impossible. Furthermore, interspecies communication is largely understudied - a mysterious division of science that may never be fully revealed. Therefore, one could safely theorize that no single human could breach this gap in communication differences (assuming chickens do, in fact, communicate) and in turn, could not understand the chicken's reasoning behind its choice to cross the road (excluding the possibility of psychic connections between chickens and humans [see 'Dog Whisperer' for a more clear explanation on interspecial psychic relations]) That being said, the only scientific and logical way one could understand the aforementioned question is through observation. For example, perhaps food was located on the other side of the road. However, this seems to pose a plethora of other questions: Why was the chicken near a road and not in a coop stocked with adequate food? Was this a wild chicken? Are there wild chickens? Do wild chickens often cross roads? Are wild chickens dangerous? If so, why hasn't there been warnings about dangerous, wild chickens crossing roads? The answer to these questions may never be discovered or explained.

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Why was the bus driver sad? The kid with the icecream had c4 strapped to his chest.

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what's wrong on so many levels? wrong wrong wrong wrong

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if a man is alone in the forest, and there are no women around to hear him...........is he still wrong?

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What do you do when a black person steals your computer Inform the authorities, as theft is a felony.

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Q: How do you wake up Lady Gaga? A: You murder her friends and family.

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Q: What do you call a fish with no eye? A: Fssshh

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Reality is often boring. TV is often bad for you. Reality TV is boring AND bad for you.

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ive got it ive got ive got outsimers to tonight wow bim bim bub bub za za

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roses are blood violets are veins vampires are crazy and you are insane

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why did the kid strike out in baseball he had leprosy and his arms were amputated

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Why did the girl fall off the swing? Because she had no arms.

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Man: Did It Hurt Woman: Did what hurt? Man: When your legs were crushed after being run over by that semi

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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