Arron Glass

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Why did the chicken cross the road? To get to the other side.

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What's worse than biting into an apple and finding a worm? Biting into an orange and finding a worm.

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Sex

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What is it called when a Native American Indian man smacks a woman in the face for cheating on him? In police code it's called a "273D Domestic violence - Felony" most likely involving an insecure man with control problems simply adding to the stereotype that Native American's are drunk, abusive and domestically violent people.

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whats worse than 10 dead babies nailed to one tree? 10 living babies nailed to one tree

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What do you call a lesbian dinosaur? Nothing, it's still a dinosaur! Her sexual orientation is regardless. ~kyle hudson

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How come the bartender didnt let the black guys in the bar Because the bar was closed.noone was aloud in the bar

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What did the man with the knife say to the ostrich? Run or I'll stab you!

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what did the boy with cancer want for christmas? a gun

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It was the week of the school formal and a girl rang up her date and said I don't have a dress for the formal. He said ok the lets go out and buy one. So they went to the dress shop to buy one but the line was really, really long so they waited in the dress line for ages and ages until they finally got to the front, paid and walked out. As they did, the girl said well I suppose you need a suit, so they went to the suit shop, and again, the suit line was really long but they waited in the suit line and they finally got to the front, paid and walked out. Then the guy said, well if we want to go to the formal in style, then we will need a limo. So they went to the limo shop but the limo line was really long as well. But again, they waited in the limo line and they got to the front, paid and left. It was finally the night of the formal, she had her dress, he had his suit and they arrived in their limo. Everyone was having a great time and the the girl said to her partner, I'm a bit thirsty could you please get me a drink? So the guy went over to the drinks table and went to get a glass of punch but there was no punch line.

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a mother: my little boy always asks me to take him to see dinosaurs...but they are extinct. me: take him to a museum you dumb bitch!

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Have you ever seen Stevie Wonder's wife? Neither has he.

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? Because it was dead.

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Knock Knock Who's there It's me open the door

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how do fit 104 jews in a car? 2 in the front, 2 in the back, and 100 in the ash tray.

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Why was the little boy crying? His whole family died.

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What did the dying man say to his friends? Nothing. He had no friends.

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What do you call a fish without an eye? A fsh

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Why is an elephant big, gray and lumpy? Because if it was small, white and smooth it would be an Asprin.

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Why did the airplane crash? The pilot had a stroke.

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knock knock who's there? a dog ......dogs cant talk ..................

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your mother is so rather large that when she stepped onto a scale, it stated her exact body weight which was 280 pounds. Which come to think of it isn't that big considering that obesity is now the norm and average people are referred to as abnormal.

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I don't know about the rest of you, but I HATE funerals.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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