Why did the Nazi not help the black man up after he had been badly injured? The Nazi was in a wheelchair.

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What do you call a blind guy in a library? Kevin. Unless his name isn't Kevin.

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There are four worms walking in a straight line. The first worm says, "Hey, there's a worm walking behind me!" The second worm says, "Hey, there's a worm walking behind me, too!" The third worm says, "Hey, there's a worm walking behind me, too!" The fourth worm says, "Hey, there's a worm walking behind me, too!" How can this be? ...the fourth worm lied!

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How many dead babies can you fit in a telephone booth? Mmm, strange question for my HSC maths exam...

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What's worse than the Holocaust? This joke.

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Why do christians believe in God? Because believing in God is fundemental in their belief system; if they did not believe in God they simply wouldn't be christians. Muslims are in a similar predicament.

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You know how I know you're gay? Because you came out to your close family and friends, who were all very respectful and accepting.

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Q: Why couldn't Sally ride her bike? A: because Sally has Cerebral Palsy.

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Do you know what it looks like when you put a cat in the microwave for 3 minutes? I don't know either because I close my eyes when I masturbate.

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What's the best way to cross the road? Ideally with your feet and legs, consdiering as disabled people usually don't recommend their unfortunate state of affairs. However there are other alternatives which may or may not be better than common or garden walking, such as crane hire - crossing in a crane bucket in a safe spot; chauffer driven limos, which don't do the straight, direct route, generally; and being carried on a replica of Cleopatra's carry couch (but with modern suspension, unless you prefer the up and down motion)

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Why don't women wear watches?...Because the economy is at an all-time low and it would be reasonable to presume that a person couldn't afford an item like this, thus, trying to budget in a watch that could cost anywhere from 50-100$ would be a risky financial move depending on their yearly salary.

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Person1: Man I had the worst day ever. Person2: Worser than the holocaust.

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Optimus Prime: "GIVE ME YOUR FACE!" Shockwave: "Illogical. I have no face." Optimus Prime: "Then GIVE ME YOUR EYE!" *RIPP*

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A brunette, redhead, and a blond were on a road trip when their car broke down in the middle of a desert. The red-head offered to walk down the road to get help, for none of them knew how to repair the car. She walked down the road in the direction they were headed, but never came back. The redhead and blond died several days later in the shade of the car as a result of extensive heat exhaustion.

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How do you make a person cross the road? Ask them nicely.

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A guy walks into a bra. The woman screams and calls 991.

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15

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Why was the blonde confused? Because she had 10 second memory loss.

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Knock knock. Who's there- oh wait, I don't care. Get away from my house or I am going to call the police.

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Q: Why can't Elvis Presley drive a car backwards? A: Because he's dead.

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Did you hear about the man who played the lottery? He lost.

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Your mom is so fat that she has trouble walking up the stairs because she gets easily winded.

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Knock knock Who's there? Be Be who? Be yourself

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Arrow in the Knee!

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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