How do you get someone to come out of the closet? Unlock it

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Why did Sally fly off the swing, She had no arms Knock knock *Who's there* Not Sally

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What do you call a black man flying a plane? A pilot, you racist.

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why did the Chicken Cross the Road? Why must you question a Chicken's motives to Cross the Road?

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Roses are red, Violets are blue. I have a gun. Get in the van

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3 black men walk into a bar. They order their drinks, tip the bartender, and could not have been more courteous.

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A duck walks into a bar and the bartender asks, "What'll it be?" The duck says that he should get his doctor on the phone because his hullucinations are getting worse.

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There once was a man from Nantucket, who had his car stolen and wasn't very happy so called the police.

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When a suicide-bomber when to heaven what did Allah give him apart from 72 virgins? 72 mothers in law.

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give one word to discribe a man who has been in combat for 10 years and finnaly gets home to his family and he chokes and dies on piece of brockly. Irony

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Roses are red Violets are red Daisies are red Tulips are red Magnolias are red Weeds are red Carnations are red Crap, my gardens on fire.

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A women walks into a kitchen.

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What's the difference between a baby and a watermelon? One's fun to smash with a sledgehammer. The other one's a watermelon

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You know what sucks? A vacuum.

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Q: What's the longest word in the dictionary? A: According to the Oxford English Dictionary (second edition), it is "Pseudopseudohypoparathyroidism."

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Boy: Hey, guess who likes you. Girl: Who? Boy: NOBODY!!!!!!!!

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Whats the difference between a baby and a watermelon? One is fun to smash with a hammer. The other is a watermelon.

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What did one homo-sexual say to his four homo-sexual friends? Were One Direction!!

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What did the penguin do in the desert? Die.

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What can a Giraffe have, that no other animal on Earth can? A baby Giraffe.

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Roses are red, violets are blue Most poems rhyme, but this one doesn't

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What Happens when you shoot a deer? It's Dead

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Did you hear about the man who lost his whole left side of his body? He has been taken to hospital and is in a critical state where his right side of his body can not be joined together. This is life threatning and he is now not able to walk

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What happens when a black guy roles over a speed-bump? I don't know. I have never tried it

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops