Yo momma so ugly that she had self esteem issues and committed suicide, making her husband extremely depressed.

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Q: What's funnier than a dead baby? A: Two dead babies.

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penis hehehehe

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Q: How many banana peels does it take to run down the street, true or false? A: Telephone poles don't have doors.

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a atheist and a christian walk into a bar, they are good friends and enjoy their conversations.

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what is the difference between me and a grown black man.... i went to school

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What do you call a guy with newmonya? Not good at spelling

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Why did the pig cross the ocean? So he could be eaten by Americans.

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There's a black guy in a house. What's he doing there? He owns it.

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Q:Who has the highest K/D ratio in Call of Duty World at War A: Hitler, 6000000/1

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A kid is stuck in a fire, his dad (a firefighter) comes and saves him. Sadly the kid needed surgery from the fire. He went to the hospital and when the doctor looked at him he said "I cannot operate on my own son." How can this be? His parents are gay...

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If you have ten apples, and I take away three, then you will only have seven apples left, because ten minus three is seven. On the other hand, if I have a hundred apples, and you take away ninety-six, then I will call the police on you because that is stealing and it is not allowed.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? He was baked.

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Why can't Helen Keller drive? Because she's dead

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knock knock who's there? be. be who? *hits you with a batterang. BECAUSE ITS BATMAN

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What is the easiest method of making multiple women fall head over heels? Have a wingman help you raise a rope at the start of a women's running race.

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A man walks into a bar with a pack of Marlboros and promptly starts to light a cigarette. The bartender rushes over to stop him. "Hey! We don't allow smoking in here chump! Take it outside." The man replies with a big grin on his face. "Oh no sir. These ain't no ordinary cigarettes. My granddad gave me this pack a decade ago on his death bed." He pulls it out and shows the bartender 19 stale smokes. "He told me that any who took a single drag off any of them would have their biggest wish come true." the man recalled. The bartender had a perplexed look on his face and yelled "What the f*** are you talking about? Get out of here before I curb check your a**!" The man was then hastily escorted out by security. He then died 4 days later from autoerotic asphyxiation.

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Why do the children cry at dinner time? Becuase there mother forces them to eat her own faeces and takes pictures of them doing it and posts it on the internet.

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Knock knock Who's there? That that that. What makes you say that?

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Mac: Hi, I'm a Mac! PC: And I'm a PC. Steve Jobs died.

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a lazy boy sleeps 23/24 hours. what does he do in the remaining hour ? he takes a nap

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Whats worse than a baby stapled to a tree? A tree stapled to a baby

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What's a worse feeling than an upset stomach? Seeing a child getting molested and not saying anything.

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I'm not hungry, so when my mon offered me a pear I said to her "No thanks, I'm not hungry". 

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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