How do you kill a blonde? Well there are many ways, but all of which are wrong because murder is illegal.

Have you seen Stevie Wonder's new house?  No Neither has he

Why did the chines were sunglasses? It was sunny.

A white guy, a black guy, and a spanish guy jump off a building. They all die on impact and their families mourn their loss for years to come.

An Irishman walks out of a bar.

Why did the male propagate the female? Because he was drugged. Slyly, this foxy female had slipped the male the date rape drug and a dangerous amount of viagra. During intercourse, the male ripped a gaping hole in the female's stomach and killed her. He woke up confused inside a dead stinking corpse.

An owl and a squirrel are sitting in a tree, watching a farmer go by. The owl turns to the squirrel and says nothing, because owls can't talk. The owl then eats the squirrel because it's a bird of prey.

steven hawking walks into a bar just kidding he has a horrable disiese preventing him from walking

What's black and crunchy? CO-Co PUFFS

A have a black guy in my family tree. He married my cousin a few years back

Why is Islam the fastest growing religion? Because black people breed like rats.

When life gives you carrots, don't make carrot juice, because it's gross.

what did the chinese man say to the convicts at the side of the road? so long gay boys what did the convicts do to the chinese man? nothing he was in a car

Your mother is so stupid that she was tested and proved to be mentally retarded.

What's black and white and red all over? Michael Jackson after being hit by a train.

What happened to the plumber payed in gum? His family left him because he was irresponsible with his business

What happens when an alien touches fire? It gets burnt

How did Helen Keller's parents punish her? They scolded her and sent her to her room.

Why did sally drop her drink? Because she was hit by a bus. Knock Knock. "whos there?" Not sally.

Why is six afraid of seven? Six hasn't been the same since he left Vietnam. Every time he closes his eyes, he's sees Charlie hiding in the darkness of the forest. Not that you could ever see those bastards, mind you. They were fast and they knew their way around the jungle. He remembers the looks on the boy's faces when they walked into that village and... oh Jesus. He shouldn't think about that now. Sometimes he still hears Tex's slow southern drawl. He remembers the smell of Brooklyn's cigarettes. He always had a pack of Luckys. But the boys are gone now... he knows that. It's--it's just that he forgets sometimes. And sometimes the way that seven looks at him... it makes him think. Sets him on edge. And he feels like he's back there... In the jungle... In the darkness. Seven has a hook for a hand as well, which is very scary.

Why did the bear eat the asian? It was hungry

What do you call a dog with no arms and no legs. It doesn't matter what you call him he still won't come.

Whats the difference between babies and basketballs? You cant unload a truck of basketballs with a pitchfork.

Three blind mice walk into a pub. They are all unaware of their surroundings, so to derive humor from it would be exploitative.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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