when you smile the whole world stops and stares for a while because you have one tooth and its half chipped.. and your a black mexican red head.

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What did the man with a colostomy bag say after his home was destroyed in a fire? At least all my shit’s in one place.

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AND THE GAME BEGINS ANEW!

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The only silverware Frank Lampard will be lifting this year is his mums urn.

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When Chuck Norris dives into a pool... he gets wet due to the aqueous nature of the water

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How do you get 100 midgets into a Mini? You have to manufacture a Mini large enough to accommodate 100 midgets. It wouldn't be street-legal, but at least the problem of getting 100 midgets into a Mini is solved.

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So its 1945, and these two blonds walk into a bar....I forget the rest of the joke, but Japan ends up getting nuked.

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Q: What's brown and sticky? A: A stick.

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Why did the boy fail the math test? He has a learning disability.

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Opinions are like assholes... ...they're both nouns.

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What did the german get for christmas? an Easy-Bake oven and a G.I. Jew

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Why did the old woman put roller skates on her rocking chair? She had dementia.

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What's worse than a necrophobiac in a morgue? A necrophiliac. What's worse than a necrophiliac in a morgue? Seeing your family hacked to death by an evil axe murderer.

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A child is in the grocery checkout with their parents. It sees the candy display and asks for a pack of Reese's. When the parents do not grant the child's request, they begin to scream and cry. When they arrive home, the child is beaten with a copper rod. The new puppy that the child got for a birthday present is hanged and fed to buzzards.

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Why did the man slowly cross the road? He had a prosthetic leg.

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What do you call a black man at the front of a bus? A bus driver

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how do u fit 20 jews in a car? 2 in the front and 20 in the ashtray

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Dey see me boilin' Dey choppin' God I'm so fresh and juicy So fresh and juicy So fresh and juicy So fresh and juiiiiiiccccy! MR MCCANN

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two men walk into a bar. they get a concussion.

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What do you feel inside after eating an entire class of pre-schoolers? A stomach ache

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If I earned a dollar for every time you've said, "I'm too old for this sh*t," I wouldn't have made very much money. You are a giraffe.

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Why couldn't the Asian couple have a white baby? Because two Wongs were mixed up in the paperwork so as a result the other Wong family ended up getting the child.

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Why does Santa Clause not have any children? Because he only cums once a year.

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American: Nice cowboy hat Australian: hahahahahaha American: What's so funny? Australian: You're so incompetent... American: What does incompetent mean? Australian: http://upload.wikimedia.org/wikipedia/en/thumb/7/78/Trollface.svg/200px-Trollface.svg.png

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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