What did the astronaut say to his girlfriend? I have AIDS.

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How many times does it take a blond to start a car? Usually once; however, the weather may have an impact how well the engine will spark.

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How much wood could a woodchuck chuck if a woodchuck could chuck wood? Why does it matter, they can't chuck wood in the first place.

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Q: whats worse than finding out you failed an exam? A: finding out you where Hitler in a past life

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sexual intercourse.

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British Dentistry

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Why did Sarah fall off the swing? She had no arms. Knock Knock. Who's there? Not Sarah

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Knock Knock Who is there? *bang* The following story depicts the life and death of Bob:___________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________then he opened the door and was shot in the face.

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What did Batman say to When they were heading to the Batmobile Robin get in the batmobile.

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Why didn't Suzie ride her bike? Suzie's mother aborded her. She was never born.

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What is the difference between a jew and a boyscout? a boyscout comes back from camp.

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That maternal figure of yours is of such inadequate intelligence that she cannot fathom that, given a scatterplot with a linear correlation of greater than -1 and lesser than 1 and a reasonably consistent rise over run, a future value along the y-axis can be predicted if following the y=a(x)+b equation.

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What did the DVD player say when a video tape was put in? You incompatible.

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What does an elephant and a plum have in common? They are both purple... except for the elephant

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What did the pig say after having sex? "Oink".

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Doctor Doctor i've got wind can you give me something? Thats not wind the doctor replies thats a rare form of stomach cancer.

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Q: What's the difference between a trampoline and a bag of dead babies? A: I take off my shoes when I jump on a trampoline.

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How do you fit 6000000 jews into a car? 1 in the front, 1 in the back and the rest in the ashtray.

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What do you call a black guy that sings? A singer.

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What's te best part about having sex with twenty two year olds? There are 20 of them ;)

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What's worse than dropping a dollar down the drain? Getting a needle shoved up your penis and it scrapes the insides of your balls open so that all of the sperm pours out of your balls and you are screaming in agony and you can never have children in the future.

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The Charlotte Bobcats

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Why was the child lying in the scrap yard? because he was being torn apart by guard dogs.

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Two guys walk into a bar. But the third one was a duck.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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