Roses are brown Violets are brown Who pooped in my garden?

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Knock Knock Who's there? Jehovah's Witnesses, can we have a moment of your time?

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Why should you never push a Mexican off a bike? Because he will file a lawsuit against you in the event of an injury.

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Why couldn't little Suzie snap her fingers? Her stepfather cut off her fingers after becoming a drunk and leaving her family.

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FAP

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Why did the first koala fall out of the tree? Because it was dead. Why did the second koala fall out of the tree? Because it was stapled to the first koala. Why did the third koala fall out of the tree? Peer pressure. Why did the boy fall off of his bike? He was hit by falling koalas.

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Why did the chicken walk into Mordor? It didn't. One does not simply walk into Mordor.

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There was an Irishman and an Australian who walked into a bar. There was also an American, who didn't. Why didn't the American walk into the bar? He was a midget.

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-Knock knock -Use the doorbell -Oh... ding dong -Who is it? -Me -Oh -Yeah -Cool -Come in -Okay -Take off your shoes -Alright -How are you? -Good -That's good -Yeah -Okay -K -Oh -Bye -See ya

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How do you entertain a bored pharaoh? (written in 1600 BCE - Westcar Papyrus) -You sail a boatload of young women dressed only in fishing nets down the Nile and urge the pharaoh to go catch a fish

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:)Knock Knock :(Whose's there? :)None ya :(None ya who? :)None ya dam business.

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Why was the blonde confused? Because someone was dressed in a chicken costume throwing pinecones at her.

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Whats blue and smells like grass? Boise States football field

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Whats the difference between a brick and a Jew? One you throw it at the postmans head, the other is just a brick

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Q: Why didn't the mexican get into the bathtub? A: He was already clean

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what has four legs but cant walk? a dog after A-N-A-L

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25

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A man had a terminal illness. He died a few months after he was diagnosed.

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what happens when Pinocchio says "My nose is growing"?

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Womens rights

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What's the biggest lie you've ever told? "I have read and agree to the Terms of Service"

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How many kids with ADD does it take to screw in a lightbulb? Wanna go for a bike ride??

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What time is it when an elephant sits on your fence? Time is irrelevant in this scenario because if this question is based in the United States it is highly unlikely an elephant will be near a fence you own, let alone sit on it, an activity rarely done by elephants and usually projected by humans onto other animals.

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why'd the women leave the kitchen? her chain broke

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops