How much coke can Charlie Sheen do? Enough to kill two and a half men.

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YOOO MOMMA LIKE A BIG MAC FAT JUICE AND ONLY WORTH A BUCK!!!!

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Why can a bird fly Because it's not a banana

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Why where the 3 little children talking about muffins? Because muffins are smart.

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A duck flies to someone's backyard pool. Moments later it takes a dump , then suddenly flies away.

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You know what rhymes with school? Hell.

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Why did the tissue dance? Because it had a boggie

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A man travels to the park, and kills a person, throws them in a bag and runs away. He then travels to the grocery store, kills 2 people, throws them in a bag and walks away. He then travels to the gas station, kills 3 people and walks away. He keeps traveling around killing people until he has claimed 69 victims in all. From this, we can infer that he was a psychotic murderer with a perverted sense of humor.

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Roses are red Violets are red Grass is red Oh my gosh, my yard is on fire!!!

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a man walks into a casino, it's the third time this week and he's contemplating suicide.

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What was Hatsune Miku's last word? bokuwaumaresoshitekizukushosenhitonomanegotodatoshittenaomoutaitsuzukutowanoinochivocaloidtatoesoregakisonkyokuwonazoruomochanarabasoremoiitoketsuinegiwokajirisorawomiageshiruwokobosudakedosoremonakushikizukijinkakusurautanitayorifuanteinakibannomotokaerutokowasudenihaikyominaniwasuresararetatokikokororashikimonogakietebousounohatenimieruowarusekaivocaloid...

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Why did the little girl stop going to dance class? She broke both of her legs in a terrible train accident

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Knock, Knock Who is there? Yo Yo who? *the man ran away and was never seen again, because he had nowhere to stay*

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Your mom is so fat, she suffers from heart disease, high blood pressure, and type 2 diabetes.

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What's funnier than 24? Nothing, 24 is just a number. There's is nothing humorous about it. Go away.

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How did Moses make his tea? He steeped the tea leaves for around 5 minutes in hot water.

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A man agreed with a camel. The camel didn't agree. ... (This joke does only make sense in the Dutch language.)

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When life gives you lemons.... Impossible life is not a person nor a dispenser of lemons.

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What did George Washington say before he crossed the Delaware? "Get in the boat."

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What did the rabbi say at the party? Mazel Tov.

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1912, the titanic sinks, 1913 ww1 starts, 1939, ww2 starts, 1954, the vietnam war starts, 90's, cold war. wow! the 20th century sucked.

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bees knees

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What do you call a black woman in a pool? Drowning.

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LOVING BIRD DIEING BIRD DO NOT FLY AWAY

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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