A: Ask me if im a fire hydrant. B: Are you a fire hydrant? A: No...

A monkey walks into a bar. Monkeys are always funny.

A mother is sitting with her son at the park. A nearby man suddenly breaks into uncontrollable coughing. The mother leans over to her son and whispers, 'Smoker's cough.' The son never takes up smoking.

What's red and goes pop? A clip art of the word "Pop"

what do you call a screwdriver that thinks it'sa hammer? a screwdriver

So, a bulldozer rolls into a bar, there is no bar now.

two elderly men were sitting in the sun discussing their lives. The first man says "my life was horrible as I had to walk to work uphill in the snow with no boots on a daily basis" The second man looks at the first and replies "you know why my life was horrible?.. I was born a jewish man in Germany during the second world war and was injustly judged and harrassed nearly to death on a daily basis"

Why'd the duck cross the road? To get to your house. Knock knock! Who's there? The duck.

What's worse than molding bread? Babies in the toaster.

Roses are red, Violets are blue, I suck at poetry, Show me your tits.

Make little things count Teach midgets math

I now pronounce you man and lion. You may now kiss the pride.

A middle-class family went away on vacation. While they were gone, a pyromaniac burnt down their house. Their cat was still inside.

Did you know? that if you were to stretch out all your organs to see how far theyd stretch? youd die.

What's worse than your dad being hit by a car? Your family being hit by a bus.

Why didn't Pat's grandma go to his birthday party? Because she died last night

What do you do to a duck with no bill? Please, leave the duck alone, it's bad enough for him having no bill.

God is real.

why did the boy drown? because water entered his lungs and suffocated him.

What's similar between my butthole and shampoo? They both smell good, except for by butthole.

yo momma's so fat that when she walked into church she had a nice conversation with some people who encouraged her to start eating better.

How do Ethiopians celebrate Christmas? They don't there to worried about dying from Aids and starvation

Gun laws don't work because criminals don't pay attention to the laws

what did the cat say to the monkey meow then he got hit by a car

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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