Knock Knock. Who's there? Jeffery Dahmer. Oh, good, you're finally here!

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What do you call a old guy watching little kids in a pool? a life guard

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A Muslim on a plane yells out "Hijack!" Jack replies with "Hello" and the two engage in a casual conversation for the duration of the flight.

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Whats happening when you see your TV floating at night? You are probably suffering from some sort of mental disorder which causes spontaneous hallucinations and should seek medical help before the condition worsens.

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A black guy and a white guy both interview for a job. The black guy gets the job because he is college educated and highly qualified.

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Poop.

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how do you get out of a room with no windows or doors? you don't.

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Did you hear about Billy's magic trick? No? Don't worry, it was a trick question.

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How do you make bread out of corpses? You don't. You grow it with bread seeds.

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What is similar about a goose and newly weds? They both aren't chairs

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What do you call a fly without wings? A walk

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How many Jews can you fit inside a car? Legally somewhere between 2 and 9 depending on seat belt availability and passenger space.

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Q: What do you call a man with no arms and no legs being pulled behind a boat? A: Skip.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because seven, eight, nine.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? How did the chicken get out of the henhouse?

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Whats the difference between a mexican and a bench? a mexican is human being, and has no simalarities to an average day wooden bench.

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Whats the difference between a blonde and a mosquito? A blonde is a Homo sapien (Latin for knowing man), a primate species of mammal with a highly developed brain, belonging to the family of great apes, along with chimpanzees, bonobos, gorillas, and orangutans . A mosquito on the other hand is a common insect in the family Culicidae (from the Latin culex meaning midge or gnat).

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Why did the motorcyclist die? I heard he was sat on by Chuck Norris.

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Q: whats worse than finding out you failed an exam? A: finding out you where Hitler in a past life

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Happy Monday!

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What do Miley and Bill Ray Cyrus have in common? Half their DNA

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What's worse than losing your job? Getting repeatedly hit in the face with a brick after getting fired from your job.

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The only thing worse than finding a repeated joke on Anti-Joke is finding a REAL joke on Anti-Joke

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Why did the plane crash? The pilot was a loaf of bread.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops