why did the clown go to the graveyard? because he was dead

What's brown and sticky? A stick.

Why was Timmy crying? Because he got raped in a van

a man was walking and saw a snake he was not afraid of snakes so he kept walking

What's the difference between 10 dead babies and a Lamborghini? I don't have a Lamborghini in my garage..

Why cant a black man and a white man cant be friends? Because bont mens are racist

why did the black man rape the little girl? no reason, its just a part of life. oh well

What happens when Chuck Norris and Mr. T get into a car accident? They trade insurance information.

Why did the monk shave his head? So he's more aerodynamic.

Beware of orange frogs with black stripes! They are dangerous! On the other hand, if you see a black frog with orange stripes, you're in no danger.

How many men do you have to have sex with to show that you're gay? But, I'm a woman!

what is worse than finding a worm in your apple the earth exploding

Whats the same between an elephant and a grape? They're both purple except for the elephant

Knock knock. Who's there? To. To who? To whom.

Jack just got his new yellow bicycle. His dad got it for his 12th anniversary. Jack was ecstatic to ride it down his street for the first time. He immediately called his friends Paul and Erick and went for his first ride. The neighbors were in AWE when they saw Jack taking off on his new ride. That day the three friends had one of the best day of their young lives, they went up to the lake, had some peanut ice cream and made fun of Alexia. Jack was in love with his new bike and euphoric that they were reunited and did all their favorite things with an incredible amount of passion. Erick hated his new bike.

How do you keep children off your lawn? Touch them.

Two guys walk into a bar. The third one ducks... ...into an alleyway to have a quick smoke before entering the bar his friends went in.

Q)Why can't you hear a Pterodactyl go to the toilet? A)Because the P is silent.

"One day this man walks out of his house to go to work. He sees this snail on his porch. So he picks it up and chucks it over his roof, into the back yard. Snail bounces off a rock, cracks its shell all to ****, and lands in the grass. Snail lies there dying. But it doesn't die. It eats some grass. Slowly heals. Grows a new shell. And after a while it can crawl again. One day the snail up and heads back to the front of the house. Finally, after a year, the little guy crawls back on the porch. Right then, the man walks out to go to work and sees this snail again. So he says to it, 'What the f uck's your problem?'" -Training Day

Hi

Pickup line: Hey babe, do you work at a grocery store? Because I wanna spill some milk on the floor so they can call spill on aisle 9 and I'll be there waiting for you and watch you clean my mess.

Q: what do you call a black guy on the moon A: An astronaut you resist bastard

I GOT YOUR BUTT PUSSY!

Why did the pirate fall off his ship? He got pushed off by another pirate

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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