A man walks into a bar. It hurt.

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Why did the man die in his office? Because a storm five miles away took down a power line that fell onto a truck igniting the fuel in it causing an explosion that started a forest fire that burned down another power line causing a spark to fly out of the man's phone and into his ear, killing him instantly.

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Knock Knock! Who's There! That's right! And now for our next song: "Magic Bus!" One TwoThree Four.....

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What is the difference between a jew and a boyscout? a boyscout comes back from camp.

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Q: What did one candle say to the other? A: Nothing, the mere thought of candles being able to possess the ability of speech is preposterous beyond any of the highest capabilities known to man.

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Q: What kind of file do you need to turn a 15mm hole into a 40mm hole? A: A pedophile.

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why did the deer jump, because there was something in it's way

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What do you get when you fall in love? A guy with a pin to burst your bubble.

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A boy called Justin bieber fell down a hole and died

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How much dirt was in a hole that was 6 feet wide and 6 feet deep? None. It's a hole.

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What do you call 20 Investment Bankers buried to their necks in sand? A team building exercise at the beach sponsored by an Investment Bank.

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A grasshopper hops into a bar and orders a drink. "Hey! We have a drink named after you!" exclaims the bartender. "You have a Melanoplus Differentialis?" asks the grasshopper. "Yes."

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how many babies can fit into a microwave i dont know i havent tried

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A baby seal walked into a club.

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Men's Sports

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What do dead babies and trash both have in common? They're both in my dumpster.

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haha your power hose was robbed and the shitty bike

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"My, what big teeth you have!" exclaimed Little Red Riding Hood. "Because I'm a wolf," explained the wolf. "And I dress in women's clothing because it makes me happier."

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what happens during a climax apples

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I'm not wearing any underwear. Why? Because I am have built in underwear. ;)

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How many Jews can you fit in a car? Statistically speaking, in a brief survey done by the United States Traffic Commission, they stated that a standard 4-door sedan had the highest percentile of drivers. So, in regards to the legal system, a person may only fit, in fact, 5 jews in a car.

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What did the boy with no arms get for Christmas? Love and attention from his parents.

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Why is 6 afraid of 7? 7 was having illicit sexual relationships with 9, of which 6 knew about, but was afraid to inform his wife, 8, who 7 stepped over to get to 9.

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why was the little boy sad? because he had a frog stapled to his face.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops