Nero7 How are you doing? This is "Eliza" I hope I will be joining, but I cannot reach you by phone, please respond ASAP time is running out.

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Roses are red, Violets are not blue, they're violet, which is why they're called violets.

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Q: What do you call a cow with no legs? A: Evolutionarily destined to be eaten by a predator such as a wolf or coyote, barring haing a defense mechanism that allows it to fend off such attacks.

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Q-how did the blind man cross the road? A-with a guide dog

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A dyslexic man walks into a bra. He is embarrassed but realises it has nothing to do with his dyslexia.

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What do you get when you have 5 Russians, a few 8 year olds, and guns? A kidnapping

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Jerry.

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What did Reed read? A. Read?

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5

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Why did the 100 year old man die? He was really old and his heart stopped beating after his BLT.

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Q: Why was the boy so sad? A: His parents were just killed in a car wreck, therefore orphaning him and his five brothers and sisters and leaving them with no money, food, or shelter due to lack of steady income and the fact that their house had been foreclosed on.

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How Many R's are in Terrence? two, how could there be 6?

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Q: What did the hobo get for Christmas? A: Hypothermia.

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What do you call a fish with no eye? Blind.

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Why is Cindy crying? She got a branch stuck in her eye which irritated her sensitive cornea so her tear duct produced a tear to help shed the material from her eye.

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Q. why did I get hurt A. My pants fell off

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What do you call a black man with a brain injury? Mentally Disabled

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When I grow up, I don't want to be a therapist. I have enough trouble figuring out the problems in my math book.

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A man is cheating on his wife. His wife finds out and is instantly distressed and begins to cry.

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Why didn't Steve finish his homework? He didn't want to.

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Grandma got ran over by a reindeer. She died

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A man is walking down the street when he stumbles upon a school, every school in the area had an American flag outside it, so he sees the flag and atop this flag a man is sitting and he doesn’t look comfortable. Next to the flag pole is a chair with a flag attached to it and the wind is as strong low down. So he looks at the man and says "Sir I think you may be using those wrong." The man on the flagpole says "why?" So he says well this chair is flat and made for sitting and this flag pole has a draw string for the flag. The man atop the flag pole says "I'm sure good will come of this…..im sure." the man says "What good could possibly come of this!" and the man on top of the flag pole looks at him and says "Later……………..you can tell this story to your friends and disappoint them when they find out theirs no punchline."

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What did the muffin, say to the other muffin? Nothing. Because muffin's are inanimate objects, therefore incapable of speech, or any other sentient ability. They baked quietly until the man who was baking them came to the conclusion they were fit for consumption, devoured them, and went on with his day.

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what is the world worst joke? this one

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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