Yo mama's so fat that when she went to go get an x-ray, they had to use the one they have at the zoo.

What is faster? A bottle of milk or a sand-filled pin ball machine? A fighter jet, stupid!

Why did the baby fall off of the swing? Because he had no arms.

The WNBA is on the cooking channel

Why did my penis cross the road? To get to the other vagina.

Two guys walk into a bar. This is really exciting as they haven't seen each other for two years and are looking forward to catching up.

A woman walks into the kitchen to see her husband cooking dinner because gender stereotypes have been dead for years.

I would tell you a joke about a pencil but there would be no point.

Q. What do you call a retarted guy? A. Whatever his name happens to be

One day, a mother was talking with her three daughters. "Mommy," the first one asked, "Why did you name me Daisy?" "Because when we took you home, a daisy petal fell on your head." "Mommy," the second one said, "Why did you name me Rose?" "Because when we took you home, a rose petal fell on your head." "MMMMBBBWWAAAAAAAAAGGGGGHHHHH!" the third daughter cried. She was born with severe cognitive damage and is incapable of coherent speech.

So God answered a paralyzed boy's prayer the other day...He said 'No'

Why did Hitler kill himself He saw his gas bill

whats worse than snakes on a plane? terrorists

what do you call a man with no arms no legs cancer and down syndrome? you call him stephen because his name is stephen

How do rocket scientists exchange greetings? They say "hi"

Q:What's worse than watching the show Jersey Shore? A:Nothing.

the iPod hand is such a great deal It's only seven ninety-nine..........................................ninety nine for one hundredth of a dinosaur wait a minute...

149

How do you know when everybody on a plane crash is dead ? When your the only one who walked out

How do you get a black man out of a tree? With a ladder.

What happened to the plumber payed in gum? His family left him because he was irresponsible with his business

Why didn't the blond cry at her child's funeral? She died, too. It was a terrible accident.

Cover myself in Vaseline and cry in the dark for 4, maybe 5 hours with or without a wooden splintery dildo in my arse..”

Q. What do you call a black pilot A. A pilot

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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