whats worse than unloading a truck of dead babies with pitch forks? Finding one alive

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What kind of nun would never drink milk? One who suffers from a severe lactose intolerance.

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Q: why did the train not make it to the station? A: it crashed and killed everybody on board.

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Why was the middle-aged doctor morbidly obese? He liked bacon and was severely hypocritical.

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Why was the cat meowing at the chicken? Because Sally got hit by a fridge.

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Why was sally crying? she was sad

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A guy comes home from work every day to his wife, who always seems miserable. He decides that her unhappiness is making him unhappy aswell, so he sits her down to talk things over. It turns out she is depressed because she can't get a job and the back wheels of her wheelchair are rusting.

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Guess where my mom lives? Utah? Correct Guess where my dad lives? Utah? Correct Guess where my aunt lives Utah!?!?!? NO!!!! Trick Question b... she's dead

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Why do blacks have a little white on their hands? God has always said that everybody has a little good in them.

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What's green and has wheels? Grass I lied about the wheels.

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What time is it? 20:45.

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Why didn't the woman make sandwiches? She was making baguettes.

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Why was the man angry? Because I slept with his wife.

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What's the difference between a bird and a horse? - Both can fly, exept the horse.

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why did the boy fall off his bike? because his mum through a fridge at him

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A horse walks into a bar and the bartender says "why the long face?' The horse says "I was just diagnosed with testicular cancer."

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What do you call a dog with 5 legs? A dog with 5 legs.

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Your mom is SO ugly, I entered her in an ugly contest, and she came in fourth place!

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what leaves a bigger memory than a passionate kiss? A STAB WOUND!

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Only steers and queers come from Texas and i dont see any horns on you so what does that mean? It means I am not a Minotaur.

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How does a yeti say hi? Raaawwwrrrr

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how many blondes does it take to screw in a lightbulb? one

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Why was the boy crying? His mother has terminal cancer, and his father does not have the financial stability to cover the cost of the surgery and keep up on house payments and buying clothes and food for the children. He will be living in a foster home in a matter of a week.

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what do you do if you see an asian trip on a step? help him/her up and ask if their alright.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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