What is the difference between a dog and pile of dead babies? One of them is alive.

What did the boy with no arms and no legs get for Christmas? Cancer.

What is blue and feels like a shirt? A blue shirt.

Why wasn't the little boy allowed to get a dog? Because the orphanage he lives at doesn't allow dogs.

What do you call this? A sentence in English.

What did the penis say to the vagina during intercourse? It didnt say anything, the male said to the female "i like pickles."

Why did the chicken cross the road? 'Cause you touch yourself at night;

Two muffins are baking in an oven. What does one say to the other? Nothing. They are both inanimate objects and can't speak.

How do you make Lady Gaga cry? Poke her face? No slap her bum!

ure mama's so fat

How many black guys does it take to change a light bulb? One.

What kind of cat has no tail? Manx cat

Knock Knock, Who's there? Banana. Banana who? The Holocaust.

A young boy recently saved a priests life. He found a solid lump on his testicle.

WOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO

A man wakes up in the hospital after being in a car accident. He begins to yell "Doctor, doctor, I can't feel my legs!" The doctor hurries into the room to find out why the patient is yelling. The doctor then promptly explains that this was due to the crash severing his spinal cord and rendering him paraplegic for the rest of his life. The doctor after explaining this states he'll never walk again, before leaving the patient's room.

Why? Why not?

Why was the Asian women crossing 8 lanes of traffic with no blinker? Poor chink had a seizure.

Why did the boy fall of the swing? Because he had no arms

How does a man with no legs cross a road? In his wheelchair.

An elephant and a llama walk into a bar. Realizing that they must have broken out of the local zoo, all of the people run out of the bar screaming.

What did Helen Keller name her dog? Due to Helen Keller's disabilities she wasn't able to own an animal. If she did have a dog, it would be named spot because that was a popular pet name in that period of time.

Roses are red, vilotes are blue Erics a dick and Chase is too.

s o m a a d i t u n y s n i t a c s d c ' s k h k s t o e l y e

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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