Why do Asians squint their eyes? They were born like that.

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every man comes from between a women's legs for the rest of their lives they try to get back in

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What do you call a watermelon in Africa? A watermelon.

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whats worse than getting a papercut on the tip of your finger? getting crushed by a refrigerator

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What is a long boring story that no one will ever want to read? the life of Sarah Palin.

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the more I study the more I know, the more I know the more I forget, the more I forget the less I know, why study?

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Why does Spongebob go to work? Because he's ready.

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roses are red violets are blue get out of my face before i kill you

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Q: how do u piss off a plumber? A: kill his whole family

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A man walks into a bar and says "ouch".

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What's a fun place to visit on the weekend? Uranus.

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Mmmm, donuts

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Brother Bro-ther Broad her Soap

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Is it closer to Minneapolis, or by bus?

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so there are 3 people who have heard of this magical cliff; theyre names are harry, dick, and joe. how the cliff works is that when you jump off you turn into whatever you say as you jump. first harry jumps off and yells plane, he turns into a plane and flys off. next dick jumps off and yells bird he turns into a bird and flys off. finally joe steps up to the cliff as he was walking he trips and falls as hes falling he yells HARRY DICK he than hits the ground and dies. everyone mourned for such a well respected individual.

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What do you get when you mix a deer and a pickle? A very odd dinner.

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Stones cannot fly. Humans cannot fly either. Therefore.. I wish I didn't get AIDS...

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what do you call a kid without arms and legs? Freak

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How many holes can you poke in my chest, When my chest is by far the best If you believe you can stab Then then grab a knife...that you can grab Skewer my breast Which lies on the best chest And you will discover A man under your covers Yes, keep on pokin' Poke my chest with the knife you are strokin' And then swallow a chode because you are stupid.

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Why was the black man drowning? His boat sank.

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why did mad is on home s walk becuaes a isnt a number

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Besides the kama-sutra, what is the most popular sex position in India? 68 and 88. Moral: Mutation people... mutation... use your imagination.., Still gotta feel a bit of envy/admiration, it is known as the happiest nation of the world, with a happiness rate with a constant well over 80 percent, and that is FAR over any other nation.

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What's the difference between a baby and a watermelon? One's fun to smash with a hammer and the other one is a watermelon.

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Prince of bell air with Keanu Reeves: SMIIIIIIIIIIITH! DID YOU DESTROY MY COUCH? Neo: ... WELL DID YOU BOTHER CARLTON DOING HIS STUFF? Neo... Will you shut up then? ... Intro: This, is my story, read the text, thank you.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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