Why did apple fall off the tree? Because Sally was holding on for dear life and she grab the apple. The apple was still in good condition; Sally however, not so good.

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Q: Why didn't johnny get any Christmas presents? A: Because he died in a house fire 3 years ago.

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why was the panda sent to prison? he played a major roll in the bombing of 9-11

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What did the little boy get for Christmas? Cancer.

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What happened when Satan met God ? Nothing, because neither Satan nor God exist.

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Knock knock. MAN: Who's there? HOOKER: The hooker you called for. MAN: Oh, dear lord. My wife hasn't left yet. I need you to come back in fifteen minutes. WIFE: Honey, who is it? MAN: It's the hooker I called for, but you haven't left. I told her to come back in fifteen minutes.

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why did Sallt fall off the swings? she had no arms knock knock who's there not Sally

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Why did the man cry when he was surrounded by black men? He got a call saying his mother had just died.

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WHATS FASTER THAN INTERNET BUSTA RYMES

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Why did the Mexican steal a pack of tortillas? To feed his family. He didn't have the necessary funds to pay for it.

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Q: How many Jews can fit in a four door Sudan? A: Two in the front, three in the back, six million in the ash trey.

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why did your mom die? Cuz i killed her

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What did the Homosexual say to the Southern American? I'm A Homosexual. What did the Southern American say back? I Respect That.

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Why was Cinderella so bad at ball? Isn't that sexist, making assumptions about Cinderella's sports capability when you have never seen her play sports before (because she is a fictional character) and then asking why this is true when you have no proof that it is in fact true? But I would guess the correct answer is (if she is bad at ball in the first place) that she never played ball before. Think about it. Why did you have to ask this question at all? Isn't it obvious?

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What did the down syndrome kid get for christmas? Pulmonary Embolisms.

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WHAT DOES A NUMBER DO WHEN IT'S HORNE? MATHDERBATION

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Why did the wife scream when she saw her husband? Because he was dead

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what's the difference between babies and a trampoline? I take my shoes off to jump on a trampoline.

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Your mom is so fat...

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Hey I just met you, And this is crazy, I've got dementia, Hey I just met you.

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If the black man lives in the black house, and the yellow man lives in the yellow house, who lives in the white house? The white man. As unfortunate as it is, racism is still a very integral part of society, and the social dominance the white man holds in countries like America are not to be so quickly forgotten.

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Jack and Jill went up the hill, to fetch a pail of water. Jack fell down and broke his crown, and Jill came tumbling after. Up Jack got, and home did trot, as fast as he could caper, to old Dame Dob, who proceeded to get Jill convicted of attempted murder, as well as several millions of dollars for pain and suffering.

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What haircut did Timmy get at the barbershop? He didn't, he saved money from the barber by going through chemo.

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how do you have a great time in a college town you don't

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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