What did the one man say to the other man? What? I don't know , I wasn't there, that's why I'm asking.

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Knock, Knock.. Whose there? Its the Census Man!!

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A white guy, a black guy, an asian guy, an indian sit together. Canada

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do you want my comeback? its in your mums mouth

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in 2001 a man was working happily in his office cubicle and got an email from his boss saying that he had great news for him. filled with excitment he knew he was getting A big promotion and could finally afford that new toy his kid has always wanted. Feeling great the man walks up to the office window to enjoy the view he notices a very large commercial airliner flying straight towards his office.

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Why did Steve Jobs step down as CEO of Apple? Because he died.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? To get to the other side.

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I don't often drink beer, but when I do, I make the poor decision to attempt to drive while intoxicated, kill a pedestrian, and end up in jail with a hangover, a DUI, and an account of vehicular homicide. Don't drink and drive simultaneously.

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whats worse than getting beaten up by a bully? realizing your fly was down the whole time and getting beaten up by a bully

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How many days can a pelican whisper? Pelicans can't whisper.

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Dyslexics have more nuf!

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Q: why was the women out of the kitchen? A: Probably to partake in one of her many hobbies.

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There was once a guy who was so crazy...he was sectioned.

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whos a tramp and stinks? David Bell

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Knock knock! who's there? Doctor Doctor who? No, this is your actual doctor, you have cancer.

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Do you know why the Mexican didn't like hot dogs? I don't know either.

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A woman gets on a bus with her baby. The bus driver says: ''Ugh, that's the ugliest baby I've ever seen!'' The woman gets off the bus and files a complaint with the public transit system and the driver loses his job.

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What's the best use for a van full of candy? Donating it to an orphanage.

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What did the fly say to the spider? Please, I have a wife and daughter.

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A man walk into a bar. He then falls down, quickly picks himself up, and continues his life.

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What did Helen Keller name her dog? A. Spot

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What did the Chinese restaurants do with dogs that wander into the kitchen? Kept them as pets.

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Why can't you lie to atoms? Because they make up everything!

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What do you call a black mailman? By his name.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops