A sad guy walks in to a bar and the bartender asks, what's the matter? The guy responds, I just found out i'm deaf

What do you call a black man? Rob

8

A horse, an apple, a leprechaun and a black man walk into a bar. They sit down and order drinks. The bartender looks at them and say "what is this, a joke?"

Whats green and fuzzy and if it fell out of a tree it would kill you? A pool table.

So a blonde a, a red head, and a brunette crash land on an island, they all died within a week...

How do you make a girl scout cry? Steal her cookies

"Wow, that was so funny i fell off my dinosaur!" Dinosaurs went extinct in the late Cretaceous period, about 65 million years ago. Commonly believed by scientists across the world to have been caused by an ancient meteor that crashed in the current day Yucatán peninsula in Mexico. Also, even if you were around during the Cretaceous period, i assure you that no dinosaur would let you climb on top of it, let alone ride it while you're not highly terrified because of the sheer danger of the experience. Now unless you are 65 million years old, I highly doubt you laughed so hard that you fell off the dinosaur that you supposedly own.

How do you keep an idiot busy? Why would you wanna keep an idiot busy, it's not gonna make a difference...

I need somebody to lean on... ...Because one of my legs was amputated after I was blown up on a mine field in afganistan.

Have you seen Stevie wonder's new mansion? No..... Either has he

How do you get 100 Jews into a Volkswagon? You don't. It's impossible to fit that many people into a car that small.

Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? Because It was dead Why did the second monkey fall out of the tree? It was stapled to the first one. Why did the third monkey fall out of the tree? Peer Pressure

What do you call 100 black men at the bottom of the ocean? A scuba group because during these hot summer months they like to cool off and go scuba diving.

a duck walks onto a basketball court during a game. The referee sees the bird and blows his whistle crying fowl just as the player was running up to dunk. The confused bird flies away and the referee gets punched by the angry player.

what do you call a man with no arms no legs cancer and down syndrome? you call him stephen because his name is stephen

Why did the chicken cross the border? Because he was an immigrant and was afraid of the police.

What are we then hypocrites?

Why wasn't the man hungry? Because he just ate a thousand almonds.

How many stripes are there on a policeman's socks? None, policemen must wear regulation plain black socks.

roses are red, violets are violet

What's black, white, and red all over? A zebra that's been brutally cut open.

what kind of sex did ethan have? webcam sex

What Happened to the man who married a money? He contracted HIV

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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