Why did the leaf fall of the tree? Because it was fall

Knock knock. *after waiting 30 seconds or so to no answer, the knocker concludes there is no one home and decides to go home to take his son to soccer practice and work on his taxes, and maybe call his mother to see how her foot surgery went* Who's there? Oh.. This is awkward, I forgot why I was here in the first place. I have to go. Bye.

What did the buisness man say to the hobo? Nothing, he threw an apple at him and laughed!

Why was the plumber sad? Because his family died in a car crash

what do you call a animal with 3 horns. a triceratops

What is worse than a case of the flu? Finding a dead camel on the highway with a half eaten lollipop in its mouth.

how many tentacles did the mentally retarded octopus have? answer: 8!

What did the grape say to the bannana? Nothing.

whats worse than the holocaust? 2 holocausts

What did Liberia say to Texas? Tag, you're it!

What happened when the white man saw a black man running with a purse? He called the police. The police proceeded to chase the black man down tackling him into a dumpster, causing permanent spinal damage. Upon investigation into the situation, the black man was deaf and he was bringing the purse, which contained an epi-pen, to his dying wife a block away. The white man who called the police and the police officers involved were sued by the family for a large sum of money.

Roses are red. Violets are blue. I'm extremely unstable. And So are you.

Two penises walk into a minefield. Both are very careful with their every step and try not to be blown.

why did the man crash a plane into the twin towers? he was a clumsy terrorist going for the sears tower

My aunt always said slow and steady wins the race She died in a fire

Why did the chicken cross the road? It felt like it, no particular reason. Why did the hippo cross the road? Same reason as the chicken. Why did the Fred cross the road? He was with animal control, and a chicken and hippo had just been reported to cross this dangerous stretch of highway.

Asian: what time is it? other person: time for you to open your eyes.

What did the rock say to the other rock? Nothing, they had just met and both were very shy.

Why is it good to date twenty eight year olds? Because there is twenty of them.

Whats better than pizza? Pepperoni pizza, if you like pepperoni that is.

what do you call an overweight 80 year old white man trying to be a pimp ? Mr.Fredrickson

Why did Michael Jackson get so many nose jobs? He was incredibly insecure.

A man on an airplane is extremely frustrated by a small, screaming child. He puts on his headphones and listens to music.

Knock-Knock. Who's there? Boo. Boo who? Why are u crying?

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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