An irishman walks into a bar and orders a beer.

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Why do mexicans jump the gate Because theres a sale at chipotle

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Why doesn't the chicken cross the road Because his dad got ran over by a car when he crossed the road

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A Texan, a Mexican, a Brit and a Frenchman are on a plane that begins having engine trouble. The black box was never found.

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What did Tarzan say when he say an elephant coming over a hill? Hey look, there's an elephant coming over a hill!

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while in iraq i bought a brand new iphone from the black market...it was only $250....its was doing fantastic until i got a text...i herd a loud beeping noise and the it exploded in my pocket and now i no longer have a penis.

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Knock knock Who's there? The police. You are under arrest for sodomy.

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Why can't penguins fly? Because their wings are adapted to swim and not to fly

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Why did the girl fall off the swings? She had no arms

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Why was little Timmy so fast? Because he's tied up in the trunk of a speeding car.

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A guy walks into a bar. The bartender says "what do you want to drink" the guy says "a blue moon"

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what is big, grey and sits in the middle of a field. A filing cabinet

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Q:What happened when the bear walked into the bar? You cannot answer because you were seriously injured by the bear.

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A moose walks into a food store. He asks the lady working there where the potatoes are. She says "go down aisle 5.'' he goes down aisle 5 and there arent any potatoes

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Q: What did the whale say to the other whale? A: MMMMOOOOOOOOOOOOOOAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAOOOOOOOOOOOOOOAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAOOOOOOOOOOOAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHHH

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A Horse walks into a Bar The Bartender runs for his life as he is tripping on acid and believes the horse is a sheep. He doesn't like sheep.

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Knock Knock Who's there? Well why don't you open the door and find out!

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Q: Whats black and green and goes 100 mph? A: A black and white car going 100 mph.

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What's blue and pink and sweet? Cotton candy.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? To visit his wife in the hospital. She has terminal cancer.

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What did one muffin say to the other muffin? Nothing, muffins are inanimate objects and can therefore not speak.

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why did CJ cry?he just ate a pie full of meat from his favorite animal.Pig

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Why did the girl fall off the swing? Because it was a hammer.

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A man walks into a bar an orders a few pints. He then goes home and brutally rapes his wife and chains his staring kids to a fencepost in the backyard along with their deceased dog named Spot.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops