Why did the little boy cross the road? Because he was stapled to the chicken

why did the bear go into the woods to get shot

What's white and horny? A unicorn

What happened when the girl did the splits? She lacerated her vagina.

a woman goes to an abortion clinic, kills a baby and still leaves pregnant.

Q: What's red, pink and spins round and round? A: A baby in a blender Q2: What's red, pink, green, and smells bad? A2: The same baby 2 weeks later

What is fat and ginger? No...Not Garfield...Rebeka Tims

Q: How did the monkey fall out of the tree? A: It was dead Q: How did the second monkey fall out of the tree? A: It was taped on to the first one!

What did the turtle say to the hare? Nothing. Animals can't speak.

A blonde girl walks into a hairdressers and asks for a slight trim. She leaves the hairdressers fairly happy with the result although she was unhappy with the price which she later concluded was most likely because of the rising inflation. However overall she felt it had been a successful outing.

What do you call a muslim on an airplane? A airline passenger.

A horse walks into a bar Barman: Why the long face? Horse: just had a stroke

What do you call a Pakistani flying a plane. 9/11

Dude, i know this guy, who knew this guy named Ben, who knew this guy named Valen, who knew this guy named Chad and he said.... Ben's Dead.

Why did sally drop her ice cream? She got hit by an 18 wheeler Knock knock Whos there not sally

Q. When you drink two 5 hour energies, do you get 10 hours of energy or double the energy for 5 hours? A. You die

What did the guy who had cancer get for Christmas? Death.

Why did the chicken cross the road? There was a worm on the other side. And the more pressing question is why do i watch a chicken in my free time

Three blind mice walk into a pub. They are all unaware of their surroundings, so to derive humor from it would be exploitative.

what happens when a hamster bites your arm? your arm bleeds

Whats funnier than a dead baby? Pretty much anything.

How do you get a black man to run? Ask him how his day has been, catch up on some memories of your time at school together, then challenge him to a foot race.

Why did the chicken cross the road? because he was hungry and mcdonalds was across the street

Q. Why do cheetahs run so fast? A. Because their bodies allow them to.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...