Whats worse than being raped? Being raped and murdered.

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What do you get when you cross a turtle and a platypus? Well, I don't think it's genetically possible by nature, but Turtpus is a pretty funny name.

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Why did the little boy chase after his ball? Because it rolled away

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What did the cancer patient get for Christmas? 2 weeks to live...

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Knock knock Who's there? Banana? Knock knock Who's there? Banana Knock knock Who's there? Orange Orange who? Orange you glad you don't have cancer?

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Did you hear the joke about the deaf kid? He didn't either.

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The Walmart Scooterwhale (Terracetus obesitus) is the only member of the cetacean family to live in a terrestrial environment. Commonly found in large-scale grocery stores all across North America, it subsists mostly on fattening junk food, microwave popcorn, and beer.

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How many republicans does it take to change a lightbulb? CHANGE?????

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What do you call a black man walking down the street? Danger Approaching

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Roses are red, violets are blue, roses are red, violets are blue, roses are red, I have amnesia.

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why did kim kardashian get divorced? because she was unhappy with her marrige. and because shes a slut

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Why was the little girl crying. Her dad wiped his bloody penis with her teddybear.

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What's brown and sticky? Human Feces

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i have a black person in my family tree he's still hanginh

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Why is Steven so gay? Because hes actually Richard Simmons

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What is funny? Your football official having a heart attack

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What color do you wear if you're in the NAVY? Beige, white, sometimes camouflage - really, it depends on your rank and the situation.

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What's the new green? Green

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How do you know that someone is polish ? They smell funny

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Whats faster that a Mexican with your TV? A speeding bullet.

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Why did the black boy fail out of high school? Because his grades were bad.

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What has 2 legs and bleeds? Half a dog.

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"Knock Knock" "Who's there?" "Knock Knock Knock" "Knock knock Knock who?" "Just let me in, you twat, it's freezing out here!"

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What's the difference between a bench and a black man? The black man is alive.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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