what do you call a kid with no arms and an eye patch? names...

Q. How is a monkey like a tricycle? A. They both have handlebars... except for the monkey.

What did the fish want to drink? Charlie Brown

What do you call something that isn't funny? Serious

it was dark outside so u know what i did....went to sleep

What do Micheal Jackson and Niel Armstrong have in common? Armstrong did the earthwalk on the moon and Jackson F#$%ed little boys in the butt.

What do you call a man with bananas in his ears? A doctor. He is clearly mentally unstable, and probably in pain.

True or False : it would not cause a public disturbence to express your pornography to the public??? ture. pornography is the freedom of speech and ability to express oneself

If I earned a dollar for every time you've said, "I'm too old for this sh*t," I wouldn't have made very much money. You are a giraffe.

Person 1:"Knock Knock" Person 2: Whos there.... Wait why did you literally say the words "Knock Knock" Person 1: I have no idea

Why did Sally fall off the swing set? Because she had a seizure.

God Nero, Marry me now! I removed the nose thingie but it wont stop.

I used to be an adventurer like you. But then I retired and started a family.

thumbs up if you want 10 dollars to ya paypal.. email me @ sickguy42@hotmail.com

One day, Little Timmy asked his mother this question, "Mommy, why are boys and girls different?" She responded, "You're adopted and Santa Claus is dead."

To men stay at the bar all night drinking non stop. They soon are rushed to the hospital to get their stomachs pumped.

What did the text-to-speech reader say when the 12 year old boy played around with it? "Ass ass ass ass, ass ass ass ass."

What happened to the kid who brome his neck? He died.

What happened to the boy that got hit by a bus? He was by a 2nd bus, by which he felt no pain because the first bus crushed his lungs and skull causing suffocation and profuse hemorraging.

Why did the chicken cross the road? because he had legs.

Why did the baby die? Because he got shot in the head repeatedly.

Your dad is so abusive that he hurts you when he losses his temper

am i invited to party? no

Eating a bagel, the man was overcome with disappointment, he thought that he had purchased a donut. He later hung himself.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...