When your scuba diving why do u jump off backwards beacause if u jump forwards than u witll still be in the boat!!!!!!

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A handicapped man walks into a bar...

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, So what is the colour violet for?

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Stop screaming! The damn uppercase letters make my head hurt! Let a lady have it for once!

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Why was the cancer patient in the hospital? Her mother threw a rock at her head.

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Why did Susie drop her ice cream? She was hit by a bus. Knock knock Who's there? Not Susie.

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What's better than winning the special Olympics? Not being retarded.

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How does a black man get a job? Through an interview.

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why'd the chicken cross the road? he didn't what kind of farmer lets their chickens out on the streets, they get crunk you know

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A Tatooine moisture farmer, an old man, an astromech droid, and a protocol droid walk into a cantina at Mos Eisley Space Port. The bartender says, "We don't serve their kind here! They'll have to wait outside. We don't want them here." The moisture farmer then says to his droids, "Listen, why don't you wait out by the speeder. We don't want any trouble."

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Why did dan jump off of the empire state building? -Because Carl pushed him off.

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"Have you ever seen a blacksmith?" "No." "Me neither."

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Why did the black homeowner default on his house? He was paying significantly more in mortgage than the actual market value of the home, since he purchased his property before the housing bubble. He carried out a cost/benefit analysis and derived the conclusion that he was effectively destroying his own wealth by paying his mortgage bills.

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When life throws you melons, You probably won't catch them.

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What did the pepper say to Mr. Peno? Hallo peno!

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Mary had a little lamb. Then Died.

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Have you seen Stevie Wonder's wife? Neither has he.

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what's 2 + 2? i don't know that's why i'm asking you

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What's worse than losing your phone? 9/11

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Yeah, it makes sense if you think about it, I changed my alias back and forth from Axel Knight, to Axel White, first because Axel White sounded not only as a opposite to Nero, but also because it sounded like something a Nazi leader would call himself, we went renegade and used that in order to draw in and bust a lot of Neo Nazi`s with enough money and bad intentions to make bad stuff happen. But thats another story, I heard about an Axel Knight partaking in Point Zero, had I known you where the leader (I hope you are being honest friend) I would have warned you much sooner, but there was no way for me to know if you where working together... Since you literally where.

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Youu might be a Jew if you........take part in a weekly service at your local synagogue.

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Why was the girl crying? She just got diagnosed with cancer you inconsiderate bastard.

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Q: Why did sally fall off the swing? A: Because she had no arms Knock Knock Who's there Not Sally! How did Sally die? She couldn't figure out how to open the fridge

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What is the result of a couples' feud? 96.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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