there was a tomatoes and it blew up and died. Why did it blow up? The Nazi's needed ketchup for there Jew Burgers

What do you get when you cross a hippo with a dishwasher? 7 7 7 7 7 7 7 7 7 7 7 7 7 7 7 7 7 7 7 7 7

What's the difference between your dog and your mother? Your dog doesn't think you're a disgrace to the family

Why do black people sit so far back in their seats? Because they're used to sitting in the back of the bus

Why did the chicken cross the road? He felt like crossing roads that day.

Why did the man fall off his bike? He ran into a pile of dead babies.

How did the snail travel around the world without any help from a transportation device? Sadly, it didn't. The snail is incapable of this kind of long distance travel due to it's small size, lack of speed and short lifespan.

Whats a movie? A moving picture.

What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? Eating the worm

I cut my pubes, Now they itch a lot.

You are so ugly that for Halloween you had to trick or treat by phone.

whats 2+2 equal? 4

you will die someday

what did the man with no arm get for Christmas? A rowboat

What does a black car thief do with a stolen car? Drive it

What is the difference between a peasant and a pheasant? One's a bird.

What did one penguin say to the other Nothing, penguins don't talk.

imagine a world without santa ill make it easy, lookout the window

There are two men named Dan. The first man says, "Hello, my name is Dan." The second man says, "Hello, my name is also Dan."

How do you make a baby cry Throw a brick at its face

Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? -Because he was dead Why did the second monkey fall out of the tree? -He was stapled to the first one Why did the third monkey fall out of the tree? -He thought it was a game Why did the refrigerator fall out of the tree? -He had no arms Why did the girl fall off her bike? -She was hit by 3 monkeys and a refrigerator

A bench doesn't breathe, apparently Mexicans do.

yous are all f u c k i n g dumb like rat kavanagh

What do you call a big group of Chinese people on Mars? An extraordinary feat for the Chinese space program and a historic day in human history, where a particular country has set up the first human colony on another planet and we have proven to ourselves that our race is capable of interplanetary travel and can accomplish anything if we set our minds to it.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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