How I seem math word problems Scenario: 2 astronauts kayaking in the Sahara desert Question: How many pancakes does it take to shingle a doghouse Answer: Purple, because ice cream has no bones

If a tree falls in the forrest and a women hears it does it make a sound? Why is there a tree in the kitchen.

What's faster than a Mexican running away with your T.V.? An Airplane

What is worse than an 11 year old getting raped You getting caught

2 black kids walk into school

Why didnt sally throw out her lunch? Her mom had a miscarriage, she was never born.

why did the holocaust not die because black people are scared of fuck

Knock Knock Who's there? A human pretending to be a dog A human pretending to be a dog who? Errr...I mean...woof

What is green and red and flies 100 miles an hour? Super Frog.

Your mother is so fat that occasionally she'll have more than one serving of preserves on her toast in the morning

Q:What kind of pizza did the World Trade Center order? A:Two Plains

women's rights

What did Marshawn Lynch say? Yeah

What would happen if you put a marshmellow in a tractor Because 7, 8, 9

What's red, black, and green all over? This is! I only wish you could see it too - the website wont let me upload a picture - but it is pretty impressive! Oh well.

Why did the deaf man go to the concert? He had recently acquired a brand new hearing aid which meant that he was able to hear much better and decided that he wanted to listen to some music.

Why did the boy lose his change? He had no Pants Why did the boy have no pants? The Holocaust

Emma Brown..I'd tap that shit Dylan xoxo

There was an old lady from Ealing Who had a peculiar feeling She lay on her back Opened her crack And pissed all over the ceiling The old lady then lay in her own waste for over two weeks due to neglect by uncaring nursing home staff. Six months later, a hidden camera documentary on underperforming care homes exposed the abuse and neglect and the old lady went to live with her son and his family. In the early hours of May 14th 2011, the whole family were killed in a house fire that gutted the home and saw fires spread to neighbouring houses. Firefighters say the blaze originated in the spare room and was caused by exposed wiring on an electrical blanket. Forensic experts said that the repeated urination on the blanket would likely corrode the wiring due to the acidic content of urine.

Do you know the muffin man? No

There's a pair of siamese twins.....One of them's gay.

How many Puerto Ricans does it take to clog the treads of my tank? Eight

What did the lampshade say to the other lampshade? Nothing they sat in silence

a mexican, a asian and a black guy are in a car whos driving? your mom

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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