25

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I advise you, don't mess with me, I know karate, kung fu,judo, tae kwon do, jujitsu, and 28 other dangerous words.

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A man gets home from work late at night and his wife is already asleep. Then he remembers that he forgot some important papers and has to drive back to work to get them.

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Why did sally fall off the swing? Because she had no arms Knock knock Who's there? Not. Sally..

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What do Sandusky and micheal Jackson have in common? They are both white.

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Why was billy sad because in the morning he witnessed his mom get stabbed in the throat repeatedly by a clown then he saw the clown in the cop car but his mask was off and it turned out to be billys dad

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Can a match box? No, but a tin can.

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What do you call a snake with no arms? Normal. What do you call an amphibian with no arms? A caecilian. What do you call a girl with no arms? A poor, poor soul that is unfortunate enough to have had an amputation when young. Now, she can't go in public without being stared at. She can't catch herself when she trips. She can't ride a bike, bake cookies for her family, or be a NASA astronaut like she always dreamed. She is the normal ASDF Movie character.

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"Knock Knock" "Who's There" "The Police" "The Police Who" "Ma'am your son just died in a car accident"

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What's hotter than a woman who is face down and ass up? A woman who isn't tying her shoes.

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what do you call a fish with no eyes? fsh

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Roses are red Violets are blue I have herpes And now so do you

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How many aborigines does it take to change a lightbulb? None. They have no idea what electricity is.

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Sex positions (and other related things), never took off... 1. The 96 2. The mission (impossible) position. 3. The Tangoers party (swingers? The fack is that?) 4.Nasal. 5. Bed waltz (requires amazing dancing skills and multitasking, now they just call everything for "bed waltz" to show off) 6.Blind Date take uno (hard to find two blind people and make sure they meet each other and have a good time by themselves). 7. GILFS take one (I mean there could be many hot grandmas out there, but "Guns Id Like For Shooting", was not too popular due accidents)

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wanna here a dirty joke? Suree A white horse fell in a mud puddle dum dumdum dum duuuuuuummmm

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How come the dog didn't want to go into the sun? -Because it didn't want to turn into a hotdog.

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Knock knock. I have a doorbell...

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What do you get when you cross a black man and a Mexican man? I don't know.

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a man with a scar on his right hand walked in to a b c d e f g h i j k l m n o p q r s t u v w x z y.

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Why did the little boy fall down? Be he had the downs.

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Why did Alec cross the road? He didn't, he was hit by an axe.

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Where do dinosaurs go on vacation? Dinosaurs are mainly extinct except for a select few such as crocodiles, which are arguably ancestors of dinosaurs. With this in mind, dinosaurs do not go on vacation because they are dead.

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A black man killed someone

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What do a fish and a car have in common? They are both edible.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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