are you from Tennessee, cause i wanna rip out your throat you piece of dirt

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Why can't the dinosaur eat M&M's? He is dead. He used to rule the Earth 65 Million years ago, though. Dinosaurs are reptiles. Whales are not. Meow?

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One day I walked into my backyard I saw a squirrel Then I was like oh hey squirrel

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What do you call a kid with no arms and no legs? names.

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q; whats small and high pitched a; rory johnston

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How much wood can a wood chuck chuck if a wood chuck could chuck wood? The Holocaust

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At least now we know, that most people are not like that, and with that sentence, my desire to see humanity as a whole happy, is dead. Thank you, you have made me realize that for each and every thing positive I have found within myself, I believed that I was simply learning more about how to be an average human being. I admire you, yet as painful it feels not to deny the truth, much of what I admire within you, reminds me of my self. Share that money with me, but as a gift, not as a contract, as a friend, not as someone buying me out, because my values might not be much, but for now, its what remains of the world I sought to create. Let us speak some other time, It was nice meeting you again Red, you always dig your way into my core, where I discover that I am stuck in life because I still sad deep inside, and then you take some of that sadness away.

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How do you torture a turtle? If you came up with an answer to that question you are completely and utterly unethical and immoral.

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What did the boy with no arms and no legs get for Christmas? Cancer. And a free haircut.

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what happened when the chicken crossed the road? it didn't the hunter shot it

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Why did the woman walk into the men's clothing store? She's a lesbian. Why did the man walk into the womens clothing store? He had to buy his mom a birthday present.

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What's worse than a crying baby on a trans-Atlantic flight? A hungry lion on a trans-Atlantic flight.

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How many Jews does it take to fix a light bulb? Four, one to take the light bulb out, one to put a new in, one to hold the ladder, and one to hold the guy holding the ladder

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Why do they call Jean a redneck? Because her neck was red from being in the sun for so long.

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Justin Bieber

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There once was a beautiful princess named Snow White who lived with seven dwarves in the forest. One day, and old hag approached her and offered her an apple. She bit into the apple, chewed, and said,"Wow, that's tasty. Is this a Golden Delicious?" The hag said, "Why yes, it is. I have a private orchard. Perhaps I'll let you see it some time." The two promptly resumed their lives.

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What's worse than stepping on chewing gum A clown throwing bricks at orphans

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Roses are red Violets are blue I'm a paranoid schizophrenic and so am i

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Q: Wanna hear a joke? A: the WNBA

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What's the difference between a baby and an egg? One is fun to throw at houses and the other is an egg.

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whos district champs not JM

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Whats the difference between a Ferrari and a bag of dead babies. I don't have a Ferrari in garage.

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A muslim in Iraq was sniped in the head by US forces. He was a terrorist, who killed 18 innocent people.

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eoin burgin is fat

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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