Roses are red Violets are blue I have Alzheimers Who are you?

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Why is six afraid of seven? Seven is a rapist.

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How did the dead baby cross the road? It was stapled to the leg of a chicken.

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Knock knock Who's there A drummer A drummer who I'm not knocking on your door

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What did the caterpillar say when he emerged from his chrysalis? I am a butterfly.

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Whats worse than a little kid falling. Him getting vigorously raped by his father every night.

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Why did Suzy fall of the swing? She had no arms. Knock Knock Who's there? Not Suzy.

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Did you hear about the kid from Texas? He shot his campus up.

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Why did Chuck Norris start crying? Because he was in a coma

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tiger woods played golf against peyton manning and yet tiger still cant win.

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Knock Knock. Whose there? Orange. Orange who? Orange you glad I didn't say banana?

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What's the difference between a corvette and a pile of dead babies? A pile of dead babies is a horrible tragedy.

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A horse walks into a bar, and the bartender says "Why the long face?" And the horse says "I have cancer".

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Knock, Knock. Who's there? Dave. Dave who? Dave proceeds to break into tears as his grandmother's Alzheimers has progressed to the point where she can no longer remember him.

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Why did Johnny close the door on Sally's face? Because Johnny is a dick.

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Yo Mama so stupid she thought "Dunkin Doughnuts" was a basketball team.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because I felt like kicking something.

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Dos Equis took down chuck Norris

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Which came first, The chicken or the egg? Well, Firstly, I suppose that depends on if we are discussing Creation or Evolution. If we are talking about Evolution, The Chicken must Logically have evolved from an egg laying creature, one which was similar to, but not quite a chicken, so, the first chicken hatched from the egg of said creature. However, if we are discussing Creation, there is no way to discern which the deity in question decided to create first, so, even odds. Therefore, Logically, there is a 75% chance the Egg came first. However, if we are discussing Chicken Eggs Specifically, the reverse is true, because the egg the first Chicken hatched from would not have been a chicken egg, it would have been the egg of another creature, a "proto-chicken" if you will. and so, in the evolution scenario, the Chicken came first. Still, in this situation, there are even odds as to which a creator may or may not have created first. Therefore, Logically, in this Scenario, there is a 75% chance that the Chicken came first

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Why did a vampire climb Mount Everest in the middle of the night on his birthday in September?

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If Chuck Norris has $5, and you have $5, Chuck Norris still has more money than you.

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Dogta I don got da aids yeah? Well Sigh... Man I am so sorry, I got the positive, and the uh.. Good news... Whats the good news? I hate you! Whats the positive news? You dont have teh aids.

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Q. Why did the kid drop his ice cream cone? A. He got attacked by a dog.

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what's the difference between Michael Jackson and Acne? Acne is a skin problem caused by chemical imbalance usually found in teenagers. Michael Jackson was a singer and dancer who should've been able to escape tasteless jokes upon his death.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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