What did the mute person tell the deaf person? Nothing. Even if sound could emit from his vocals the impaired of hearing person would still be unable to respond unless they have taken classes to read lips. The deaf person didn't take classes nor did the mute person learn sign language.

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What name does Steve Bartman go by Now? Steve Bartman, but he just hides all day trying not to be killed.

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Hillary Clinton

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Today if my birthday, and I got given the Anti Joke Book! Happiness!

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What do you do if your walking into a room full of Lions and Jaguars? You stop walking.

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What sound did the man make? Splatt. He fell off a building.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? It was suicidal.

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Knock Knock Who's There? Bad-mannered Bad-mannered who? F*ck Off

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A thought for the day: Life is like a game of chess. In the constant struggle for power, control and safe positions it makes no difference whether one plays white or black. As long as everything is planned and one stays a few moves ahead, everything will work out. Just don't annoy the queen, or she may send some very irate knights to fork you or a bishop to flank you. [L]

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fjasdklfjklasdjfasdfk .... sorry i have terets!

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Out of all the sadness and death in the world...do you know what the worst part is? Mexicans are still hoping the border...

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(approach girl) How much does a polar bear weigh? Enough to fit into the same dress as you

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They didn't stop pulling my hair i didn't stop pulling the trigger

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What's worse than the holocaust? Nothing, the holocaust was a tragic event in human history.

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What do you call a bear. Rob.

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What have a blueberry and a raspberry got in common? They both can't ride a skateboard

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KNOCK KNOCK! Who's there? KNOCK KNOCK! Umm... Who's there? KNOCK KNOCK! OMG I SWEAR TO GOD WHO THE HECK IS THERE?!?!? KNOCK KNOCK! *opens door* Oh.... It was a woodpecker...

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A man walks in to a bar, the bartender asks "what will it be?" The man says i don't know, what will it be?"

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What starts with a P and ends with O-R-N? porn

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Knock Knock. Who's there? The police. You're under arrest. The police you're under arrest who? Sir, if you don't open up the door we're going to have to open it ourselves. We have a warrant for your arrest. Sir if you don't open up the door we're going to have to open it ourselves we have a warrant for your arrest who? Sir we are authorized to use deadly force. If you don't comply we will shoot to kill. Sir we are authorized to use deadly force if you don't comply we will shoot to kill wh-

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whats fat round and bouncing off the ground= George goodburn

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Why did the chicken walk into Mordor? It didn't. One does not simply walk into Mordor.

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What do you get when you cross a rock and a paper bag? A rock inside of a paper bag.

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What would happen if you put a marshmellow in a tractor Because 7, 8, 9

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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