What was the pirate movie rated? PG-13 for violence and brief nudity.

An early Jewish man walks into a bar where a number of stormtroopers have gathered for drinks and is taken into custody and then delivered by railcar to a camp where he and other persecuted minorities are deliberately imprisoned in a relatively small space with inadequate facilities where they await their mass execution.

what did the fish say when he was eaten by a shark nothing fish cant talk

What does an unemployed black man and a mexican have in common? They both like to shop at forman mills because they have reasonably priced clothing items.

An Irishman walked into a bar, except he would call it a pub, because there are slight differences in vocabulary in different regions, 37 minutes later he walked home safely, fed his cat, read some pages of a book he had been reading, turned the light off and went to bed.

What has two wheels and a handle bar? A bike.

Why did the hooker go to the bathroom? Because she just exchanged sex for money and was cleaning herself up for her next trick.

Roses are red, Violets are blue, Cement is grey, Shoes are myriad colors, but usually white, black, or brown, depending on their use, And I love you.

What kind of pizza did the world trade center order? Two cheese pizzas.

Why is Dave's baby dead? Because his wife threw it into the path a Big-rig.

why did sally drown? because she had no arms or legs and couldn't swim.

What's 21 and pregnant? Ariana Grande

Sigh... You know life, you start all optimistic and "I am going to be wealthy mommy and stuff" Then you know, life turns not quite out like you planned it, and, well, you wish you had made some other choices you know what I mean... Your grades where not that good, that girl you really loved did not like you back, you know what I mean right? ...Well I don't, how is it like?

Why couldn't Helen Keller drive? Because she was a woman.

25

Which came first? The chicken? Or the egg? Whichever one was more sexually excited i guess.

Give a man a fish and you feed him for a day. Give a man a gun and he'll build you a refrigerator.

Why couldn't the hobo buy any clothes? They did not have his size available.

- Bob, what's interesting to see in NYC ? - Yes, exactly

How did Muhammed Ali get into Professional Boxing? With a lot of hard work and dedication.

What's 1+1? 69.

Q: What is harder than cleaning off baby bloodstains off a wall? A: Cleaning multiple baby blood stains off a wall.

Q: How do you fit two beluga whales into a mini van? A: You don't.

whats white and sticking?... glue, you dirty bastard

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...