Here's a joke, a black man walks into a store and buys something. that's it.

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Knock knock. Racism.

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Phew... it's gone.

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The past the present and the future walk into a bar it made no logical sense that three things that will always contradict each other exist with each other and can walk into a bar without limbs or being alive it wasn't tense it made no sense

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why didnt Tim Tebow go to church? He had practice half an hour before the service was scheduled to start, and to do both was impossible and missing practice would have resulted in disciplinary action from both his coaches and his teammates.

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Is this the Krusty Krab? No, This is Patrick.

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An old couple walks up to me and says, "can you take our picture? It's our 50th anniversary." I reply, "sure." Then I pull the man to the side and ask, "how do you make a relationship last so long? I can't make one last 50 days let alone years." He leans in and says, "cheat"

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A priest, a nun and an Irishman walk into a bar. The barman says 'what is this, a joke?'

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What is the most dangerous gull in the world? A gull with a machine gun!

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What did I say to the joke? What? Correct.

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What did the Christian say to the Muslim. Nothing. He understood his right to have a opinion even if his religion is against it.

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Why cant Helen Keller drive a bus? Cuz she's dead!

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Where did Jonathan go when the bombs hit? Everywhere.

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Colloqiual irregularities are a significant part of the English language, and excellent example of this is between can and may.

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What did the audience watching inception say at the end ................ WAT THE FUK

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What's the difference between a duck? Nothing, they're both the same.

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How did the blonde get Lost in her house? Netflix.

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I took your mother out for a classy steak dinner. I decided not to call her agian because we weren't very compatible and the conversation was very superficial.

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Why are Pine trees green? Because light reflects at different wavelengths, and the chlorophyll, found in chloroplasts, being abundant in the needles of pine trees, Reflect the correct wavelength for green.

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How do you fit 100 babies into a bucket? With a blender. How do you get them out again? With Doritos.

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2 Penises

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What did the homeless man get for Christmas? Nothing.

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Why did little Timmy scrape his knee? He was launched off of an aircraft carrier.

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What's the difference between a pile of bricks and a pile of dead babies? I don't have a pile of bricks in my basement.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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