a potato a chicken and a rooster ate a cat and you just wasted your time

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Q: What do you call 5 white guys sitting on a bench A: The NBA

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A man walks into a bar, drinks a few beers, then calls a taxi to take him home because he knew the risks of drunk driving.

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What's green and fuzzy, and if it fell out of a tree it could kill you? A Pool Table.

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Can you guess the following words? Boo*s s*x *orn g*y cu*t b*tch Answers: Books, six, horn, guy, cult, batch.

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Why didn't the lobster share his treasure? Because he did not possess the cranial capacity to understand the concept of ownership; thus, he did not consider the treasure his

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What did the muffin, say to the other muffin? Nothing. Because muffin's are inanimate objects, therefore incapable of speech, or any other sentient action. They baked quietly until the man who was baking them came to the conclusion they were fit for consumption, devoured them, and went on with his day.

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what does a gorilla do when it sleeps. it snores.

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Sometimes I light my hair on fire and pretend I'm a candle.

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what is the tastiest veggie? veggies aren't tasty.

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So this chat, the talk on the phone was all a ruse?

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Your mom is so fat that she is fat.

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What did Hitler say to the Jewish boy? Nothing, Hitler died many years ago...

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a boy walked into a pet store to get his bird some food. they were all out. the bird died.

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How do you avoid being hit with a toaster? You don't walk past the man hitting you with a toaster.

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One day, Little Timmy asked his mother this question, "Mommy, why are boys and girls different?" She responded, "You're adopted and Santa Claus is dead."

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whats the difference between harry potter and a jew? harry potter can escape the chamber

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Knock knock Whos there? Sorry, wrong house,goodbye!

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Why do women wear make-up and perfume? Because they are ugly and they smell bad.

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What do you call a woman with a black eye and several cuts on her face? The police and perhaps a social help hotline. She now feels safer and more secure and will go on to lead a happy life thanks to you speaking out on her behalf.

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Yo mama soooooo dumb! You should really take her to a doctor, she might actually suffer from mental retardation, I'm just concerned about her.

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How many dyslexic people does it take to ruin Christmas? One, because they murdered you mother on your birthday.

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A redhead and a blonde both go out to smoke a cigarette. They are both at risk of lung cancer.

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What's 1+1? 69.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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