Why did the boy drop his ice cream? Because he was mauled by a tiger.

Why did the chicken cross the street? He wanted to make breakfast

Two men walk into a bar... ..I didn't say what type of bar...

An Englishman, an American, and an Australian walk into a bar. They speak English to each other.

Why did the boy lick the window? He had Down's syndrome

A man told his daughter not to give his dog coffee. His daughter turned and told him that she was his nurse and his alzheimers is getting worse.

Why was little timmy crying? He walk in on his dad molesting a minor.

What was the hardest part about the orphanage burning down? My cock.

Q: What do you call a black guy with his degree in dentistry? A: Doctor

Roses are cheap Violets are on sale It's Boxing Day Please buy my flowers I really need the cash.

why did the women give her sister a present because it was her birthday

what is black and green and rainy all over? the democratic republic of congo

How many licks did it take for the owl to get to the center of the tootsie roll tootsie pop? A: Since when did owls have tounges?

two people are falling out of a plane, a blond and a brunnete who hit the ground first. the blond, the brunnete brought a parachute

A man was driving five penguins across the Croatian-Serbian border. He was a penguin smuggler.

A young baby died.

Two ducks are in a bathtub. One duck says, "Hey, pass me the soap." The other duck says, "What do I look like, a type writer?"

Q: Why can't Carl drive? A: Carl is a stone

An Irishman walks into a bar and orders a gin and tonic. The bartender gives him a sprite and charges him $12.

What's worse than getting full-blown AIDS? Nothing.

why was six afraid of seven? it wasn't. numbers dont have feelings.

Yo mama is so fat, when she went for a swim at the beach, she had a GREAT time.

What does a lonely man do on opposite day? I don't know. Why should we know what he does, that is both weird and illegal. Stalking is a serious crime and should not be used. We do not know what he does on normal days, thus we cannot come to a conclusion to this question. However, I do hypothesize that he must be social on this day because this is the opposite of lonely.

New groundbreaking research has just revealed today that a complex sentence can be used to manipulate the human mind, so in this sentence somewhere is a psychological amemphism that subconsciously hypnotises the mind into doing something within the next five seconds, and if you read this sentence over and over again, you might just spot it!

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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