Q: Why do Mexicans love rice and beans? A: Because it's fairly easy to grow in places with relatively low rainful and high temperatures like that in which they live in.

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Why did the fat black guy fail his eye exam? He's blind.

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A: Knock Knock! B: Whos there? A: Its the f**king cops we have you surrounded.

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Q: Why couldn't Helen Keller drive? A: Because she is a woman.

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Two muffins are sitting in an oven. One says to the other, "Boy, it's hot in here." The other muffin doesn't say anything because it is a muffin.

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A man keeping specific track of time,eagerly waits for a punch line.

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andrew wagner

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A man walks into a bar. It was a salad bar, so he left.

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Whats worse than the Holocaust? reading posts on this website that arent antijokes. Seriously poeople... you cant just say something that random than put something tragic. it has to be funny and tragic.

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Why does pavement get hot. Because it’s black. How could you tell she had bruises. Because they were black. Why did the boy drop out of school. Because he was dying of melanoma.

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Knock knock. The door was not answered because, rather than rapping upon the door with his knuckles twice consecutively, Joseph simply said the onomatopoeia verbs vocally. He intended to wish his neighbor and dear friend of twenty years the best of luck with his current situation, as his neighbor had been recently divorced from a marriage of forty-eight years. Joseph then walked home, because intruding upon his friend's privacy would have befuddled him even further.

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Why did Johnny close the door on Sally's face? Because Johnny is a dick.

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What do you call someone with no body and no nose? Nobody nose.

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What do you get when you shoot 3 cute kittens that have just walked into the house? 3 dead kittens

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Whats 10 times worse than a war? Ten wars.

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A man was found dead, in an ice cream van, the other day. He was covered from head to toe in hundreds and thousands, with two flakes sticking out of his ears. The police say it was a tragedy and will be informing his next of kin in the next few days.

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what do you call a dog with no legs? whatever his owner named him it is a shame he can`t run and play with other dogs.

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Yo momma so old that she should be concerned about mesothelioma and asbestoses, as she may have lived during a period of increased asbestos use. She may also be at risk of osteoporosis and should take vitamin supplements daily to improve her rapidly deteriorating health.

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what is the germans word for fat dick what is very fat hairy dick

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Rich people gave money to charity Charity gave money to the homeless The homeless spent the money on drugs

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Q: What did the boy with no arms and legs get for Chrismas? A: Cancer

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There were three men named manner, poop, and shut up. they all were mad fun of in middle school and ended up hating their parents for giving them such retarded names.

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A black man walks into a bar. The bartender shoots him.

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A black man and a Mexican are in a car. Who's driving? The cop. The two men were best friends who had taken off from their law firm. Alex had recently gone through a divorce and John decided to take him on a trip backpacking across Europe. It started raining and an off-duty police officer picked them up and took them to a nearby hotel. The three men had drinks and the friends had a wonderful time. But Alex never got over Jenny leaving him. 3 months later John found him dead in his home by auto-erotic asphyxiation.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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