A woman is home washing her dishes when she suddenly slips banging her head on a cabinet. She passed out for a few seconds, then woke to find a great gash on her left cheek, fairly spurting blood. At the emergency room, the doctor asks, "How did this happen?" The woman replied, "My boy friend tried to drown me."

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What do you say to a black man with AIDS? I hope you get medical help and find a cure for your illness.

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whats the best way to burn calories? Set a fat kid on fire.

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Why was the man late for work? Because he slept in.

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Where did Susie go during the explosion? On her knees to catch it.

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Why did they save the man in a burning building? To arrest him for arson.

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what is red and smells like paint red paint

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Why did the mans nuts itch he had crabs

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What did the blonde say when she tripped down the stairs? Nothing she was unconscious and had a serious concussion.

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Knock, knock. Come in.

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Hi... your father has testicular cancer and he will die in 2 months....

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Why did Hellen Keller's dog run away? Because it could see and hear.

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A white player in the NBA. Wait...

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Why was Martha put in a wheelchair? She was hit by a rabid cabbage.

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how do you open a can of coke with no tab? throw a washing machine at it

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Knock Knock. Who's there? Nobody, you got ding-dong-ditched

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What happened when Aladdin rubbed his lamp? It got slightly cleaner.

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HAHAH MY WORD IS HAPPY CLAPPY

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Everyone text/call Mrs. Butt Hemingworth for a free pint of her delicious marmalade! Serious inquirers only. 832 704 1331

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Why did the Zombie kill and eat a man? Because it was hungry.

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My mom was telling my brother how much it hurt when she stubbed her toe. He told her she should try child birth.

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Whats the saddest part about the sandy hook shooting? There were still bullets in the clip... Im going to hell by the way.

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What kind of bee's make milk? Booobies!

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What's the difference between a black man and cake? I like cake.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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