Q: What do you call a psychic midget who has escaped from prison? A: A SMALL MEDIUM AT LARGE!

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an invisible man walks into a bar and asks for a drink. No one noticed him cause hes invisible

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A man walks into a police station with a gun... He is there to turn it in, he found it on the side of the road and realized that this situation would best be handled by the proper authorities.

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What's blck and blue and doesn't like sex? The ten year old in my car.

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why was six afraid of seven? because seven had a huge ass mole

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A man is walking down the street and sees a women sat on the pavement crying, he walks over to her and asks "what's wrong?" to which the women replies "it doesn't matter" the women then walks away as she did not want to share personal information with a stranger.

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I <3 Hitler

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Why did the Gazelle run away. Because a lion was nearby and as we all know, nature called for the lion to be a carnivore, so the gazelle is in danger of being consumed by the lion.

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What do a grape and an airplane have in common? They both have wings! except not the grape.

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What do a Shark and a lemon have in common? They can both swim, except for the lemon

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Two guys walk into a bar, the third one is a duck.

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What do you call an Arab on a plane? A passenger, you racist!

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How do you perform CPR on a black person. OK, first come down. I wish I could ask why you turned to Anit Jokes.com to ask this question, but this is serious. First, check for any air blockages using two fingers, then...

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why can't Michael Jackson bake a pie???? Because he's dead

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Why didn't the 13 year old boy have any friends? He was autistic and didn't connect properly with people.

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What did the blind, deaf, quadriplegic boy get for Christmas? Cancer.

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what happens when u fall down the stairs? you break your arm.

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A dyslexic Irishman walks out of a bra.

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What did Helen Keller say to the priest? Nothing, she didn't know he was there.

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Why did the man murder his wife in cold blood? Because she was alive before he killed her.

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This sentence is a lie.

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I don't always drink beer but when I do, I viciously beat my wife and children.

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Police say's 'have you been drinking' and you reply back saying 'YES' then the police brings out the blower and you blow, it says on it that you are fine, but then the cops ask you 'what did you drink' and you just say 'well i drank juice for breakfast then had some water, tea, coffee' the cops get really angry but before he says anything you say that ' I AM MUSLIM'

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What do you call a group of asians? China.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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