Why did Sally fall off the swing? Because she had no arms. Knock knock Who's there Not Sally

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Whats the difference between a duck? One of its legs are both the same.

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This is not mean't to be a joke, but I have noticed the least popular thing on here is the Jew and the Pizza joke. I am Jewish and find this extremely offensive. I applaud all of those who gave it a negative vote and realize the Holocaust is not a laughing matter.

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What is a pirate's favourite letter? There is no definitive answer. It depends on the individual pirate, and the environmental and genetic factors that go to make up his or her preference for a particular letter.

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Why did the blonde cross the road? Because she was stupid.

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Why are black people so good at basketball? Dedication and hard work

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What did the cat say to the rabbit? Nothing, cats are incapable of human speech as far as scientists are concerned. Also, the mouse was having a bad day. Rutabaga.

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What did the Mexican say to the Black guy? Nice to meet you Mr. President. I'm Antonio Villaraigosa, the Mayor of Los Angeles.

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A wife asks her husband if he can fix the sink and he responds with Do I have plumber written on my forehead. Then she asks him if he can fix the porch and he responds with Do I have contractor written on my forehead. So the husband goes on vacation and comes back to find the sink and porch fixed and he asks his wife how it is fixed and she says that the new neighbor helped. So she says the neighbor said he would only do it for cake or sex. The husband respond by saying Which one did you choose. His wife responds by saying Do I have Betty Crocker written on my forehead.

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A boy in Bible class was poking a girl in front of him with a pencil. Atfer, maybe ten minutes of this, she was asked "Sarah, what did Eve say to Adam after they had had twenty-seven children" The boy poked her with the pencil again. She stood up, and said "I think we have enough kids Adam."

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What did the gay man say to the other gay man? I like guys... cause I'm gay.

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In soviet russia, 6 is not afraid of 7

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Roses are grey, Violets are black, I have Alzheimer's, Barthtub.

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An Englishman, a Frenchman, and a Viking are all fighting over a piece of land. The piece of land was the whole of England and this was the beginning of the Noman conquest in 1066.

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Why did the zombie go to school? Zombies do not exist and certainly do not go to school.

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skjer;nf;oashfaefaohesf oiqeshLACLAHN IS SUTRP SD] make it shorett and swert

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What did the faggot say? Nothing, he shot himself due to high school bullying and rejecting parents.

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Roses are Red, Violets are blue, Run Quick, Before I eat you and die of obesity due to high blood pressure and bad heart disease!!!

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Those that want what is best for me, shall listen to me and do only whatever I want. Those that want ONLY what is best for me, underestimate me greatly. You who stand in the way if my will, claiming you want what is best for me, better move aside.

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Why did George smoke weed? Because he was depressed after his wife died and couldn't get over the fact that he would be lonely forevermore.

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Starter clothing

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My dad went into Home Depot, he went in to get garage door part, he took an hour and came back out with three things.

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Q: What's DNA? A: The National Dyslexic Assosiation.

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My friend and I were telling jokes the other day. Ha said " I've run out of dead baby jokes!" to which I replied " I've run out of dead babies."

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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