Why was the stress line down? Because now the population is one-hundred short of yesterday.

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Knock. Knock. Who's There? Its Jim, is Craig home? No he moved out sorry.

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A man is on a military operation, he dies and has a funeral.

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Your momma so stupid, she speaks poorly and can't spell very well.

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whats sad about 3 black people driving a Cadillac over a cliff? that was my Cadillac

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Q: What kind of punch do vampires drink ? A: None... It's really blood, you should know that by now.

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Why couldn't Ray Charles read? Because he was blind.

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A Higgs Boson walks into a church, and the priest says, "We don't allow Higgs Boson's in here," and the Higgs Boson says, "But I thought Christianity promised acceptance to everyone who believes."

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Q: Why did the chicken cross the road A: It didn't do it for any good reason,chickens are mindless and do random things,like crossing the road

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Why did the man get hit by a van? He was blind, and his guide dog was an idiot.

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What did the grape say when the elephant sat on it? Nothing, scientific research has shown over thousands of years that grapes cannot talk.

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Whats black and gay? Obama

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You know whats funnier than 24? What? 25.

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A white police officer pulled over a black guy on the highway. The cop asked him for license and registration. The black guy had a tail light out, and was very polite and cooperative. The two became close friends, but then one night, the black guy went to the house of the white cop. The black guy brought his wife and daughter over for a dinner party, eating grilled turkey sandwiches with mayonnaise. When the cop's attractive wife asked the black guy if he would like some fresh watermelon from the patch in their back yard, he respectfully declined, for he needed to return to his own home to patiently wait for a business call from one of his employees, who was also a very intelligent and hard working African male. Once home, the black guy turned on his stereo, to listen to some calming country music at an appropriately low level of volume, as his daughter and wife had gone to sleep, for the wife also had work in the morning, at her law firm, and her daughter had a job interview after her day of classes at Dartmouth were out for the day... then Martin Luther King Jr. woke up from his dream, and was soon thereafter assassinated.

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What did the pirate say to the ninja? I have aids.

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Why did the chicken cross the road To go to KFC

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I got 99 problems, and most of them involve my terminal illness.

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2 boys are going to get candy from the store. What happened? A robbery and they were killed

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Hey Bill, did you know we have a black guy in our family tree? Really? Yeah, he's still hanging there

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what do you say when you wake up in the middle of the night and see your tv floating thats odd.

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What do you call an arab with a beard? How cares what his name is just shoot him!

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Why did the man with seasonal allergies not take his medication? He had liver disease...read the fine print

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Roses are red, violets are blue, I'm not good at poems, nice tits.

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I have read and agree to the Terms of Service.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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