What do you call a deer with no eyes? Noideer! No.Blind What do you call a deer with no eyes and no legs? Still Noideer! No, it's basically dead

What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? Finding a dog in your apple

How do you get a clown off a swing Hit it with an axe.

What do Michael Jackson and Donkey Kong have in common? They're both famous.

If 6 is afraid of 7, what is 7 afraid of? ...Chuck Norris.

HaHaHaHa... Was the last joke funny? Ya, well this ones not.

Knock Knock Knock Knock Knock Knock The person who lives inside is depth.

what do you call a man that just got brutally murdered? i don't know, check his birth certificate.

WHY CANT THE ENGLISH MAN FIND HIS.....PANTS? BECAUSE HE NEEDED TO LOOK HARDER!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! AHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!! LOOK HARDER ENGLISHMAN!!!!!!!!LOOK HARDER!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! yell this joke out loud and u will realize that its really funny!!! ^-^

The bartender says "We don't serve time travellers here". Two time travellers walk into a bar.

why did the chicken cross the road? because chickens are very absent-minded creatures. the chances are the chicken saw some form of bug or other edible life form from across the road and decided to venture over in that direction. if the road was not there, the chicken would most likely have still crossed that same expanse of ground, regardless of potential consequences.

jimmy carr walks into a tax office.

A Duck walks into a bar.

Who kille the Mockingbird? George Bush: i wish i could know the answer for this question, but belive me i am thinking.

What did the caterpillar say to the robot? Nothing. Caterpillars do not have vocal chords and there are not, as yet, any truly portable robots capable of comprehending speech so to speak to one would be pointless.

What's worse than being a jew in the holocaust Being born black

The graduate with a Science degree asks, "Why does it work?" The graduate with an Engineering degree asks, "How does it work?" The graduate with an Accounting degree asks, "How much will it cost?" The graduate with a Liberal Arts degree asks, "Do you want fries with that?"

What do you call a fat man that can turn slim REALLY fast? Drew Carey

What did the brown guy say to the black person when he got fired? Nothing, did you think this was going to be racist or something?!

what is purple and hairy like a bear? A purple bear

Knock Knock Who's there A pile up A pile up who

How many dead body can you hide in a hole? 100. Forget the fat guy

What did the white man hand to the mexican? His college degree because the mexican had completed all four years of college with a 4.0 GPA.

A chemist and his buddy walk into a bar. The chemist, trying to sound smart, says, "I would like a glass of H20." The buddy, being a normal person who actually cares if he looks like an idiot, asks for plain water.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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