hwhy did the monkey fall out of the tree? he got shot. why did the other monkey fall out of the tree? he was nailed to the first one.

What does a homeless man get for Christmas? A gun to kill himself with

Knock Knock. Martha, get the door I'm watching the game!

Why the girl fell from the swing? cause she had no arms

I was jaywalking when it hit me. You know, a car.

010010101210001010 You dirty girl

Why was the little boy crying? His whole family died.

What's sad about 4 black people in a Cadillac going over a cliff? They were my friends.

What's worse than scraping your knee? Getting a needle shoved into your penis and the needle hitting your scrotum so that you are in serious agony for hours and finding out you cannot have kids because of it.

If you saw two cowboys in a kitchen, which would be the real one? Why do you automatically assume one of them is false, or that either of them is real?

so a black guy, an asian, and a scott are sitting at a bar, they drink responsibly, pay their tab, and leave. The evening couldn't have been more pleasant.

Why did the chicken protest? He wanted to be able to cross the street without getting his motives questioned.

Your momma so fat.... She's at risk of cardiovascular disease. You should take her to a nutritionist.

what did the kid with no arms and no legs get for Christmas Cancer

Hope you all drop the soap in prison

Why did the girl fall off the swing? Because she had no arms.

What did the kid with no arms and no legs get for Christmas. A pool.

Roses are red, violets are blue you may not know this but I'm falling for you . <3

What does a boy with no arms and no legs get for Christmas? Cancer

What did the gay guy get at the grocery store? A tub of Häagen-Dazs ice cream because he thought he deserved a treat.

What do you call a bitchy unreliable friend? You don't call that bitch at all.

Girl 1: I just can't find the man who'll make the perfect husband for me. Girl 2: Maybe you're asking for too much. Girl 1: Yeah, probably.

What looks like donuts but stinks of shit. Sean Big Macs socks

Q: What's black and white and red all over? - - - A: Nothing. If it is red all over, then it is not black and white.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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