Youre in your car, and you stop at a light you see a home less person holding a sign that says "Home less and hungry, anything helps." You ask if they want a box of cereal, "No thanks." They replied, you ask why not? "Well, I really just want to go to the movies."

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Why can't the black guy read? Because he's blind.

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A duck walks into a convient store and ask the cashier, "You got any bread?". The cashier immediatley responds, "No sorry, we don't sell bread." The next day the duck comes back and asks the same cashier, "You got any bread?" The cashier sighs and responds, "No, we still have no bread." After browsing for about three minutes the duck comes back and asks, "You have any bread?" The cashier, as pissed off as a beached whale, says, "NO! WE WILL NEVER GET ANY FRICKEN BREAD AND IF YOU ASK AGAIN I'LL NAIL YOUR BEAK TO THIS COUNTER!" The duck sways his head and looks to the ground, only to look right back at the cashier and ask, "You got any nails." The cashier says, "No." The duck comes back and says, "You got any bread?"

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What's yellow and cant walk? The Sun

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What animal wouldn't you want to play games with? Probably none of them. They are animals and incapable of playing board games.

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Whats the difference between a truck full of bowling balls and a truck full of dead babies? You can't unload one with a pitchfork

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Q: How many babies does it take to paint a wall? A: Depends on how hard you throw them.

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i like turtles

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How much does a polar bear weigh? About 800 pounds

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How do you fit three gay men on a stool? You don't, that would be very uncomfortable.

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What did the dead woman say to the murderer nothing dead people cant talk

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Why did the plane crash? Because a loaf of bread was the pilot.

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William Raines.

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a Black Swan walks into a bar......,,,.she then has hallucinations and imagines herself having lesbian sex with Mila Kunis...

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Whats the same about a Mole and an Eagle? They both live underground, I lied about the Eagle.

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Whats worse than runing over a box of kittens? Runing over two boxes of kittens.

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What's worse than one bee sting? 2 bee stings

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An English man, an Irishman and a Scotsman walk into a bar. They each buy a pint and talk about their day.

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Thomas Hobbes had a happy life. Actually he didnt, he was born prematurely causing his mother to die. Then his dad left him at an early age to the care of an abusive older brother because he was an alcohollic. He did inspire many political beliefs though

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Why did the Chicken cross the road Because he was not happy with his life at a chicken due to the fact take he was going to get eaten by a black man so he hoped that if he crossed the ride and got hit by a car and die he would regenerate into a poisonous frog

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Obamacare

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Why did the coconut fall out of the tree? Gravity.

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Dear John,

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2 mentally, unstable , woman visit the cinema , and watched "The Sweeney,"they really enjoyed it

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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