Parents are very similar to trees. They fall over when hit repeatedly with an ax.

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Why did the genie not grant the man his 3 wishes? Genies don't exist, only vampires live in lamps.

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Man: Did it hurt? Woman: huh? Man: Did it hurt when i killed your family?

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That is a bad anti-joke down there | V

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what is big, grey and sits in the middle of a field. A filing cabinet

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Q:Do you know why Jesus would not be a good goalkeeper? A:Because he never played football

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What do you call a man with no arms or legs? Whatever his parents named him

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Knock Knock. Who's there? A cannibal. WHAT?! You are about to die and be eaten.

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Why did everyone call the one-legged man Matt? Because that was his name.

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What's worse than finding out your husbands gay...........finding out he's gay with your brother"

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How do you starve a zombie? You dont, they are allready dead.

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What do yo get when you cross an insomniac,an agnostic, and a dyslexic. A very troubled man.

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New mission: refuse this mission

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What do you call a fish with no eyes? A blind fish.

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What do you call a mix between a mexican and a octopus? Actually, at this moment in time it is physically and morrally impossible to do such a thing. Scientists have yet to find a way to split the genes and create a cross species. lol jk its called a moctapus.

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your momma is so fat that she should be worried about her higher risk of heart disease, diabetes, and ugliness.

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a kid plays computer games alot and gets carpoltunel in both hands and lives in pain for the rest of his life.

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A horse walks into a bar. The bartender says "why the long face?" The owner of the horse then explains the evolution of the species and genetics. The bartender, satisfied, serves the owner a drink and gladly gives the horse water.

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A dyslexic agnostic insomniac stays up at night wondering if there's a dog.

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Did you hear about the comedian cereal killer?...He raped his victims before strangling them to death.

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whats the easiest way to kill a baby? let it live a long and meaningful life, prolonging the inevitable death of old age.

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Knock knock. Who's there? Not Heath Ledger.

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Why was Ray Charles always smiling? because he was a happy guy

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Why did the Kitty stop meowing? Because its dead.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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