Why is Helen Keller a bad driver? Because her inability to see or hear makes her an extremely dangerous road hazard.

Why did the plane crash? Because the pilot was a loaf of bread. Why did the car crash? Because the driver was a loaf of bread. Why did the boat sink? Because the pirates attacked.

A viking walks into a bar, and orders 6 beers. the man working asks "why did you order so many beers?" the viking says"because one for me 6 brothers who were separated from me many years ago." then he leaves. the next morning the viking walks into the bar, and orders 5 beers.the man working says"im sorry for your loss." the viking says"what? oo no im just getting tierd of drinking!'

What's fatter than your mum? Your mum's mum

Why did sally fall off the wings? She had no arms Knock knock Who's there NOT SALLY HAHAHAHA LOVE YOU JK

What's the difference between a park bench and a black man? The bench can support a family!

Why did the man fall off his bike? I threw a fridge at him

What did the little boy with cancer say right before he died? Nothing. He was very sick, and could not speak during the last few weeks of his life.

A: Knock Knock B: 7

Two muffins are sitting in an oven. One says "It sure is hot in here!" The other one says "We're both going to die in here and nobody will hear us scream."

If the blue man lives in the blue house, and the yellow man lives in the yellow house, who lives in the white house? The blue man. He has made a good living with a high salary and has enough money to afford two houses.

what did the duck with roller skates say to the camel? how are the wife and kids?

what did timmy from southpark say after his warther melested him? TIMMY

What's the difference between above job and below job? Below job sucks

Richard Gere has a girlfriend called Goldie

What's worse than being a Jew in the Holocaust? Nothing.

What did the lion say on a hot day in Africa? Nothing, lions can't talk.

Whats black, and chrispy inside...? A black guy with bonecancer

A house comes around the corner.

What do call something that looks exactly like a turtle but is not a turtle? A picture of a turtle

The Economy

I'm a vegan thats why I am still a Virgin.

What is a gremlin? A gremlin.

What's rock hard and is sharp? A rock...and my penis.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...