How did the chicken cross the road. He didn't he was ran over by a bus.

What's the difference between George W Bush and a doorknob? George W Bush is the president of the United States. A doorknob is a mechanical device that securely closes a hinged door, thereby keeping your family safe from danger.

A black man checks his watch. He sees that its 3:50, and calmly carries on with his day.

Build a man a fire and he will be warm for a night, set a man on fire and he will be warm for the rest of his life.

the danced cus they were young, they danced cus they were free, but mostly the danced cus they needed to pee

Why did the chicken cross the road. ... It didn't.

What do you call a black man holding a pistol? A black man holding a pistol

Why couldn't the Asian drive? He was blind

Guy gets new car. TRANFORMER!

PROS = good things CONS = bad thing So, if PROgress is a good thing...then why is the US government call CONgress?

Chinese drivers.

A dog walks into a bar and orders a pint of beer The barman replies : Woof Woof

Q: Whats about two feet in width and length with purple veins throbbing at the sides? A: A midget slowly dying of frostbite

A Man buys a Prius. Hated it.

So i walk in my house after drinking that night.... my wall is green

I Stumbled this site and then read some antijokes, then I wrote a antijoke but I couldn't write a antijoke because their Terms of Service were down so then I lied to them saying I've read their Terms of Serivce and then I lied again, told them I were human, argued by saying "barnote plate" to them. They accepted.

How did Pikachu jump off of a 100 story building and survive? He's not real

Roses are red violets are blue, he is for me and not for you, he's too ugly you can have him

Why is Michael J. Fox unable to build domino chains? He only has one domino.

Q: Why couldn't the ginger play soul music ? A: He couldn't hit the right notes

Father "Why so down son?" Son "I've always been this short..."

Why did the boy drop his ice-cream? He was shot in the back, knifed in the face, kicked in the groin, poo'd on by an alpaka, had frogs stapled to his face, his hair burnt off, pushed off a cliff, eaten by a scorpian, lost his arms legs and eyeballs, squashed by a hippo, ran over by a buss, truck and cement mixer, had cement poured on his frogs (that were stapled to his face), became morbidly obese, was raped by a chicken, was served as sauce at an italian resturant, was done by his mother's father's grandson, broke both of his detatched legs, crashed his car, went into a time machine and was crushed by a stegosaurous, had a lemon squesed in his detatched eyes, got high on cokeawana, was crushed to death by a garbage disposer and was rejected by the hobo at the shelter? no, actually, he tripped

What is a turkey? The offspring of a turtle and a monkey.

Did you hear the one about Helen Keller? No. Well neither did she.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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