What do you call a puppy that has been left in the cold? A puppsicle

Why is this the best day of 10 year old Johnny's life? His parents were killed in 9/11, and Osama Bin Laden has been found and killed. What, Too soon?

Why didnt sally throw out her lunch? Her mom had a miscarriage, she was never born.

A Buddhist priest, and mexican drug lord, and a 12 year old girl walk into a bar. The bartender looks at the little girl and says. "Honey, you're too young to be in here." the little girl looks around and says. "Oh, My mistake." and leaves.

Yo mama so fat she has to wear large clothes

How many dead babies does it take to paint a wall? Depends. How hard can you throw?

I was relaxing on the beach today when a fat bird came over and said, "Would you rub this lotion into my back please?" "I'm afraid I'm only here for the day," I replied.

What is the difference between a black man and a Chevrolet? They didn't sell Chevrolets in the 1800s.

What has two legs but can't walk? A quadriplegic man who lost mobility in his legs due to a horrific logging accident.

Why did the man lose the poker match in the jungle? He was playing a cheetah.

Ms Leong Sux

Why is my phone bill so low this month? Because you have no friends.

What's the difference between an ant and a dinosaur? They are both birds, apart from the ant and the dinosaur

How did the polack burn his hands on the stove? He placed his hands on the hot stove top burners not realizing they were hot.

How do you get a dog off of your roof? Shoot it.

If a man shouts in a forest and there is no woman around to hear him, is he still wrong? He could be, he could not be. It really depends on what he says. The greater concern is that he's shouting alone in the forest. Either he's in trouble or he has a major psychology disorder.

So a horse walks into a barn.

so the guy @ the asian restaurant ask the waiter why his beverage tastes funny and the asian waiter says "It's likely that you are used to classic coke and they changed the formula"

My mom farted, she also has Alzheimer's, I also have Alzheimer's. Also pizza didn't like it

Why did Sally fall off the swing? She has no arms or legs. Knock knock Who's there? Not Sally

How old is your mom? Old.

Knock Knock Come in!

LOLLLLLL! Lakers? making me laugh so hard! LMAO

The duck didn't cross the road.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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