Two generals went for a trip, it went very well in general.

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What do you call a black man in an envelope? A tiny black man

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What did the boy do when he ran out of Pringles? He killed himself.

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What is the difference between a trampoline and a baby? You take your boots of before jumping on the trampoline!!!!!!!!!

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What is life? It is a sexually transmitted disease which always ends in death. There is currently no known cure.

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Well, honestly I don't know how I feel about meeting you yet, or chatting with you, I never believed I would get to speak, or even less meet "The Nero", I mean as far as I know, nobody that ever worked alongside you ever has... ...By the way, the thing with the metal arm, well I don't have both arms, so yeah, story of my life. I am "Eliza" here too, its not coding, its just me sharing my real part of my life with our followers, and well, they do not make much sense out of it, but I get to share the tale about how Nero saved me, if not in person.

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What did the four pigs do at the farm? Roll in mud.

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Bob- yo mammas soo fat tha.. Joe- I know...

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What did the blind man say to his wife? -would you mind helping me upstairs, for I cannot see.

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what do you call a nun in a wheel chair? Virgin Mobile By: jb lshs

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When I walk in the rain, I get wet

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What do you call two blacks on a bike? Two good friends having a good time.

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What's green and has wheels? A frog in a wheelchair

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What did Michael jackson say to Abraham Lincoln? Nothing, there are both currently deceased, if they did, however, say something to each other, it would not be in person, because they are both dead.

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Where's Waldo? Nowhere. Waldo is a fictional character. He doesn't exist.

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A fat guy at starbucks, waiting for his regular 160lbs breakfest. why is the 10 black kid crying? he's hungry and there is no starbucks in somalia .

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Why didn't the skeleton cross the road? Because skeletons cannot live on their own and there is no such thing as a skeleton that can walk across roads without muscles.

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A man throws a penny off of a cliff. He is now one cent poorer

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Whats the difference between a dead baby and a corvette? I didn't get 20 years for owning a corvette.

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Why did a car full of African-American men pull up to a lonely white man walking on the sidewalk at 12 p.m. in Harlem? To ask for directions.

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What does a person with Alzheimer's do? To get to the other side.

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What worse than stubbing your toe? Getting raped by a panda.

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Did it hurt when you fell from heaven? Cause it looks like you landed on your face.

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What's big, wet and hairy? Not what you think it is.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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