Variants: :) I will always assist you in whatever you want. :( I want to kill you all by myself! Sense? Non? Fuck? Mind? Fission Mailed? Impossible Mission.

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What did the man say to his doctor? AHHH AHHHHH OH MY GOD! AHHH OUCH HOLY SHIT FUUUUUUCK!!!... ____/\_____/\_____/\___________________

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Old Mother Hubbard Went to the cupboard, To give the poor dog a bone: When she came there, The cupboard was bare, And so the poor dog had none. So Old Mother Hubbard was reported for animal cruelty

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YA MAM, is a very nice person

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Q: Why did the baby cross the road A: He was stapled to the chicken

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What do you do when a blonde throws a pin at you? Give her a time-out. Throwing sharp objects is not okay.

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id give my right arm to be ambidextrous

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What did the indian boy say to his friend? He didn't he was too busy studying

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What's better than winning gold in the special olympics? Not being retarded.

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Give a man a fish and you feed him for a day. Give a man a gun and he'll build you a refrigerator.

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how many licks did it take the boy to get to the center of a tootsie pop? he died of cancer

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There's a Christian preist, Jesus, and a Jewish rabi on a boat. They want to go fishing, but they forgot the sunscreen, the bait, and the fishing line. The Christian preist walks across the water and goes and gets the Sunscreen. Jesus walks across the water and gets the bait. The Jewish rabi steps out of the boat and drowns. Jesus turns to the Priest and says, "Do you suppose we should have told about the underwater bridge?"

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what do you call a kid with no arms and an eye patch? names.

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Why did Simon drown? Simon couldn't swim.

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Why cant Helen Keller drive a bus? Cuz she's dead!

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Why did elmo jump of the cliff caus he was depresed

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whats bonged in and looks like milk? harry after some cani

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what did the kid say when he could not find his shoe? wheres my shoe?

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Whats the difference between a monkey and a baby? Eating a baby tastes better with saltines.

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What did the fish say when he ran into a wall? Dam...

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What do you get when you cross a joke with a rhetorical question?

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why did CJ cry?he just ate a pie full of meat from his favorite animal.Pig

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What do you call a man named Jimmy? Jimmy

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whats blue and doesnt like cheese? the sky, i was only messing about the cheese

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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