what comes in a can ? Beans Where do beans come from ? Cans

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knock knock Who's there? ... Hello?

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Why didn't the chicken cross the road Because he did

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A guy walks up to his boy and tells him, "Hey, if you don't stop masturbating you'll go blind." The boy says, "Who are you? Your not my father."

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How do you fall off a building... JUMP.

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So a black man, an Italian, a Mexican, an Irishman, a Chinese man, and a Jew walk into a bar. They go their separate ways and never see each other again.

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What did the black cat say to the tabby cat?? Meow

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Punching a baby

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What did the boy say to his father? I don't know. With the seemingly infinite number of topics that two people could discuss and the fact that both the father and son are fictional, it would be unreasonable and border edge mentally unstable for me to assume that you would know what they may or may not be talking about.

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Haikus are easy But sometimes they don't make sense Refrigerator

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What do you call an asian jumping off of a building? A suicide victim.

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Q: Why is grass green? A: I painted it.

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Q:Why did the man rob the bank? A:He needed money.... duhhh -Ryan Vallee

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look at this bag of air it has some chips in it

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why shouldnt you throw a rock at a black guy on a bike? Just because its not very nice.

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Why did the monkey fall from the tree? Because he died.

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A German challenged an Englishman to a duel But their neigbours found out and alerted the police

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I once heard a funny joke, it was as funny as a funeral

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Punch line.

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What do you call a man who never farts in public? A private tooter!

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What do you do if there's a rabid elephant chasing behind you, a vicious jaguar to your right, a rearing horse to your left, and a bloodthirsty lion in front of you? Innoculate yourself with a rabies vaccine, prod the jaguar on the nose with a stick (they hate that and will probably flee as a result), speak softly and calmly to the horse and encourage the lion to go for the elephant instead of you. You will probably still die as a combined result of mauling and trampling, and it's unlikely that you'll have two rabies vaccines to hand by chance for such situations, but your chances of survival will be minimally improved.

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What do you call a moose with a 42 gauge shotgun pellet through its head? Open Season

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What happens when you cross a Kangaroo with an Elephant? A genetically unstable animal that dies shortly after birth.

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a dog and a duck went out for a meal they both ordered lobster and enjoyed the night.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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