Why couldn't the pirate get into the adult movie? He had just spent the last of his money at Ihop with his friends, and is now regretting ordering two Rooty Tooty Fresh and Fruitys when he was really only hungry for one.

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Anti jokes.

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What happened to timmy? He had downsyndrome and walked off a cliff

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What did bob get his wife for christmas? Pregnant

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How many licks does it take to get to the tootsie roll center of a tootsie pop? Ask the starving African.

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what did the soup kitchen give people for christmas Meatloaf] -Fluzturnusturbusturcusterdustur

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Cause fuck you thats why

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A horse walks into a bar. He politely holds the door for a young woman.

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What do you call a computer running Windows DOS? Obselete

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whats worse than god meaner than the devil. the poor have it the rich need it nothing

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Question: What did Mr. Reeves say. Answer: Nothing

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because the chicken was a self-absorbed prick. And, honestly, the chicken and the road weren't that great of friends anyway.

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Lilys are from england violets from japan. I've got a knife now get in the van

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Q: What does 'A' stand for? A: Effort

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I had sex with the Earth, and out came global warming...Imagine what will happen if i had sex with Obama?

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A Black man, a Mexican, and a Midget, get in a car. They drive to the county fair and get snow cones and have a really fun time.

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How did the hot blonde get a promotion from her boss? She worked really hard and achieved more thaan her coworkers.

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What happened to the kid who slept on a roof? He died

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ON THE SEVENTH DAY OF JUNE, THURSDAY HAPPENED!!!! -ilikecrepes97

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Yes or No? You're wrong because it was both.

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What's worse than having to tie one of your shoelaces after walking 5 miles? Getting a 56 year old mixture of blood, urine and sperm injected in your asshole.

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Why are blonds so stupid? Because our society is insecure and we need a common denominator to pick on, so we can feel more comfortable with our mediocre lives.

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What do you call a black man on the side of the road? -A black man who needs a ride.

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A man is in a bar with a drink A lorry driver come in a gulp the guys drink down The man starts crying the lorry driver says"don't cry I will buy you another" The guy says "it's not that: Today I woke up late for work and when I finally got there my boss fired me so I get in my car to go home and it wont start so I walk home while it's raining and when I got in I found that my wife was sleeping with the gardener so I came down here and asked for some poison and you went and drank it"

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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