How do you make a plumber cry? Tell him that Luigi beat him to the princess

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Hey, did you see Stevie Wonder's new house? No He didn't either.

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How did the Jew his German neighbor? Every morning the Jew says hello and the German replys hello

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Whats red and smells like blue paint? Red Paint

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when Bonquisha and Letroy had a baby girl what did they name her? Courtney.

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Why did the boy miss the toilet when he was peeing? Cause he was in the shower.

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Why was Little Timmy crying ? He dropped his ice cream. Why did he drop his ice cream? He got hit by a bus. Knock-Knock! Who's there? Not Little Timmy.

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What do you call people who play dance dance revolution? Dancers

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Making jokes about 9/11 is just plane wrong.

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A seal walks into a club.

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Why was he arrested? He broke the law.

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Knock Knock! Who's there? Banana. Go away.

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What was unprecedented about Roosevelt running for president in 1940? He had polio, he couldn't run!

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A man rode into town on Friday and stayed a while and then left on Friday how did he manage this?

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Q. What's better then a baby in a microwave? A. What the hell is wrong with you? Did your parents not love you enough when you were born? Everything is worse then a baby in a microwave! Besides the felony charges it is extremely wrong! Your going to hell.

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Why did the baby cross the road? It was stapled to the chicken.

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Roses are red, Violets are red, Daisies are red, OH SHIT! MY GARDEN'S ON FIRE!!!

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Elmer: "Wabbit Season" Buggs: "Duck Season" Elmer: "Wabbit Season" Buggs: "Duck Season" Elmer: "Wabbit Season" Buggs: "Wabbit Season" Elmer: Bang

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whats the difference between a bird and a turtle? they can both fly but the turtle cant

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why was little johnny laughing all day cactus

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Why was the Catholic priest incarcerated? 2 counts of child pornography and 3 counts of sexual abuse with a minor. Since he is now released, he's working as a janitor of an elementary school.

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An owl and a squirrel are sitting in a tree, watching a farmer go by. The owl turns to the squirrel and says nothing, because owls can't talk. The owl then eats the squirrel because it's a bird of prey.

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What's blue and pink and sweet? Cotton candy.

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What do you get when you cross a turtle and a kangaroo? A hybrid combination of the two that is characterized by specific traits of both animals.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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