- Anti Joke

what was so bad about hitler? he inadvertently subjected his political officials to death by rope

what did the older brother do? put on a joke on anti jokes what did the younger brother do ? give it a minus score what did the older brother do ? tell him and then played gears of war 2 (they got gears 3 but wanted to go bakc in time, not like michael J fox in a car with a crazy doctor but as in play an old game)

what is the only thing in the world that can pick up 1000 jews at once? A vacuum cleaner

what did one caterpillar say to another caterpillar? let's be butterflies

So a catholic priest, a pedophile, and a rapist walk into a bar. He orders a beer.

Why did your mom cross the road? She Tripped and started rolling

Why did the chicken cross the road? To try to get the antidote for his dying baby chick.

What do you call a fish with no eyes? a genetically disfigured fish please stop pollution.

What is black, white, and red all over? A penguin that someone shot with red paintballs.

Q: what did one kangaroo say too the other kangaroo? A: I was told I am schizophrenic.

What word starts with N and ends with R that you never want to call a black person? Neighbor.

There once was a man from Peru Who fell asleep in a canoe He got a slight case of sunburn which improved later after applying some ointment.

If there are anti jokes why are there no uncle jokes?

Three Jews walk into a bar. One says something to the other two, but it was in Yiddish, and I don't speak that, so I don't know what he said, but all of them laughed really hard, so it must have been funny.

A man wanted to kill himself.. He did.

How many dead rats can you put in your ex-girlfriend's bed? 437.

One day, I was looking at my brand new wooden table, and I thought, "wow, that is a very nice brand new wooden table." And then my dog peed on it. I killed the dog.

Roses are red Violets are buckets This poem makes no sense Boobs

a blonde takes 1 hour to swim 100m of breaststroke.

There was this guy at a bar, just looking at his drink. He stays like that for half of an hour. Then, this big trouble-making truck driver steps next to him, takes the drink from the guy, and just drinks it all down. The poor man starts crying. The truck driver says, "Come on man, I was just joking. Here, I'll buy you another drink. I just can't stand to see a man cry." "No, it's not that. This day is the worst of my life. First, I fall asleep, and I go late to my office. My boss, outrageous, fires me. When I leave the building, to my car, I found out it was stolen. The police said that they can do nothing. I get a cab to return home, and when I leave it, I remember I left my wallet and credit cards there. The cab driver just drives away." "I go home, and when I get there, I find my wife in bed with the gardener. I leave home, and come to this bar. And just when I was thinking about putting an end to my life, you show up and drink my poison."

Knock knock! Go away. I'm busy masturbating, and it would be extremely awkward if you were to entire my residence at this time. Please return at a later hour.

Roses are red, Violets are blue, This poem doesn't make sense. Refrigerator.

i should have been sad when my flashlight died.... but i was delighted.

Jerry Rice is walking down the streets of San Francisco when all of a sudden he hears sirens coming from the next street down. He hurries down the road to see what's happening and sees a huge fire engulfing a 10 story building. And on the top floor, a lady is leaning out the window shouting to the firemen below. FIREMAN: Come on, lady, jump. We have the tarp here, we'll be able to catch you. LADY: No....I can't. My baby, my baby is up here. FIREMAN: Throw the baby down, we'll catch him. LADY: No, you'll miss. I can't leave my baby. Jerry sees this and steps forward. "Hey, I think I can help. Let me have the bullhorn." JERRY: Hey lady, I'm Jerry Rice, the wide receiver for the San Francisco 49er's. I'm the best wide receiver in the game, throw your baby down and I'll catch him, this is what I do for a living. Being a 49er fan herself, the lady recognizes Jerry and throws her baby down to him. Just as she throws it though, a huge gust of wind comes and takes the baby and starts to blow him off course. Jerry sees this and takes off after the baby. He hurdles the line closing off the area, fights through the crowd, dodges a couple of fire fighters, jumps over the car, and dives forward, just making a fingertip catch of the baby. The crowd around him goes wild and starts cheering his amazing catch. So Jerry jumps to his feet, raises his finger into the air, does a two step and then spikes the baby. If you have any dead baby jokes that are not here, I want to hear from you. Email me your dead baby jokes at skitzopathik@hotmail.com and I'll add them to this page.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

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NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK! Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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