Why did the Mexican cross the street? He didn't

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Abortion.

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How many jews does it take to change a lightbulb? One.

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Roses are red. Violets are blue. and Asians are yellow.

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Y- You O- are L- such a O- Loser

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How many dead babies does it take to paint a wall? Depends on how hard you throw them.

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Why do black people cuss so much? Because f#*% you.

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How do Chinese people name their kids? The couple discuss possible names and then pick the one that they feel suits the child best.

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What did the little boy say to his malignant tumour? "Hello" The tumour did not respond.

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'Knock Knock' "Who's there?" 'Nobody. Your schizophrenia has become so bad you can barely make it through a normal day without emotionally collapsing. Your social life has dissolved into a world of fear, and your personal relationships have crumbled away before your eyes. Major depression and anxiety are eating you away. You have nothing left.'

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, I have Herpes, Now you do too.

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What walks on the three legs? Martin, he was born with a tragic birth defect and struggles to make a living.

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Sarah Palin walks into a bar and the bartender tells her to get the f*&k out.

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How do you wake up lady gaga? First you simply whisper in her ear telling her to wake up. If she doesn't, simultaneously whisper and tap her gently. If you have failed to achieve your accomplished goal, repeat step two however intensely touch her and project your voice when telling her to wake up. Step three, get a... WAIT WAIT!! I just waisted 20 seconds of your life, you're never going to meet her.

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Knock knock Who's there? Isabelle Isabelle who? Isabelle Williams Oh hi Isabelle come in

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Me: Why are red onions actually purple..? Dad: I don't know Sister: *sarcastic* Well, Why is it rainy in London? Me: ....Because that's the weather pattern.

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what happened when steven hawking's date stood him up? he feel down

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What do you do when you come across a tiger in the jungle? Wipe it off and apologize.

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What do you call a cross between a dog and a bumblebee? One messed up lab experiment!

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What do you call a man with no arms and no legs? Steve

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What do you call a man with no arms and no legs floating in a lake? Bob.

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How does a dyslexic person read the word 'schitzophrenia'? Schitzophrenia. I leid abuot teh dyslxeia.

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Why did the boy drop his ice cream? Because he was hit by a bus.

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Pickup Line: Hay girl is that a mirror in your pants. Becuase I can see me in it.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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