Why did the chicken cross the road? To get away from the farmer that was trying to kill it.

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What's the difference between a blonde and a carrot? One's a human, the other's a vegetable.

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A bartender walks into a bar. It's his shift.

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What do you call a black guy that flies a plane? A pilot.

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Why is the interesting goat so talented at chess? He's Bobby Fischer's dad.

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Why do Asians squint their eyes? They were born like that.

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I've got a dig bick. You that read wrong. You also read the second sentence wrong.

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There was once a little boy who started feeling sick. His mother gave him some soup. He died anyway.

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What do you call a gay couple of kangaroos adopted baby A Joey

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Did you hear why the peanut got arrested by walking next to another peanut? One got a-salt-ed

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Girl: I wrote a poem. Boy: Let's hear it! Girl: I like you, thats a start. You don't, so we are growing apart. In my heart there's a little tear, its funny to see how much you care. I hate the way you played my heart. You never finish what you start. Boy: Cool. Whose is for? Girl: You... Boy: Wow ummm, I have to go to......................yeah bye.

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My friend just phoned me from the Boston marathon. He was being taken to the hospital due to being injured by the explosions and had to have his leg amputated.

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A black man and a Mexican are in a car. Who's driving? The cop. The two men were best friends who had taken off from their law firm. Alex had recently gone through a divorce and John decided to take him on a trip backpacking across Europe. It started raining and an off-duty police officer picked them up and took them to a nearby hotel for drinks. The friends had a wonderful trip. But Alex never got over Jenny leaving him. 3 months later John found him dead in his home by auto-erotic asphyxiation.

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What do you call a man with multiple sexual partners? Well, first you strongly urge him to get tested for any contagious and potentially dangerous STD's that could have been transmitted from one partner's genitalia to another person's genitalia which could have very well been he himself. They could be life threatening. Oh, and call him by his first name.

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What type of pants do Mario and Luigi wear? Levi or Denim, I'm not sure why but probably because you can get a nice fitting pair for only a couple of bucks.

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How do you drown a black man? You refuse to help him due to your pride and therefore you are no longer a decent member of society.

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Roses are orange Violets are grey I love penguins Damn Jews

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This is a little story about four people named Everybody, Somebody, Anybody, and Nobody. There was an important job to be done and Everybody was sure that Somebody would do it. Anybody could have done it, but Nobody did it. Somebody got angry about that because it was Everybody's job. Everybody thought that Anybody could do it, but Nobody realized that Everybody wouldn't do it. It ended up that Everybody blamed Somebody when Nobody did what Anybody could have done

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What do you call a black man? Rob

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What's the difference between a black man and a Jew? Nothing, he's the same person

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I was just thinking of how much i laughed at the challenger launch.

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theres a mexican women and a black man in a car....whos driving? nobody sadly the driver was shot.

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What do you call a dog with no legs? Max

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Why did the young Mexican apply for a job at McDonalds? The economy is down and his family could use the extra money.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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