What's the best way to get high without doing drugs? Jump.

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Why did the turtle cross the road? He was stapled to the chicken.

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What do you call a kid without brothers or sisters What? a chinese Boy!!!!!!! lol ;)

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Hey Babies, The holocaust called, they want their screams back

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How many members of Coldplay can you fit in a mini? 4, as there are 4 members of Coldplay.

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Why did Johnny buy the strawberry ice cream? Because when he gets the chocolate he vomits and bleeds out of his asshole.

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Two blondes get in a taxi. Who's driving? The taxi driver.

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Why was the crocodile depressed? It wasn't; given the primitive anatomy of the reptilian brain, modern biopsychoneurological evidence suggests that reptiles feel only basic emotions such as fear or anger.

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Friends are like pickles. If you eat them, they die.

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This is an anti-anti joke. I don't expect him to get it.

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https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCM8MQg1bn9y38H8Irhuxx-g

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What's worse then me banging your mom? The fact that I gave her HIV

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Why did the boy not wake up on time for school? He was fuck in dead.

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Susie sells seashells by the seashore. Susie was a schizophrenic bitch who caused irreversible harm to her family and those close to her. She also had underage sex with a black guy named John. He was actually a pretty decent guy, but he decided to smoke weed a couple times when his dad was going through some tough times. His dad resented him for this fact and it caused unresolved tension between them for years. This caused John to go out and seek younger girls to have sex with, to fill the emptiness he and his dad's relationship left him with. Meanwhile, Susie was falling in love with John, not knowing his many dark secrets he had tried best to keep hidden from her. Eventually, all of these things come out in the open, and Susie still respects him and ultimately loves him even more for being so honest.

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What is dark in the darkness even if you shine a torchlight on it? A blackman

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A hitman and his target walked in the same bar togather what happend? nothing because a hitman has better things to do and the target would lay low.

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Your mother's so fat that affects her self esteem.

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There once was a boy. On his birthday, he got a small puppy. The puppy was white and had big eyes. Boy loved his puppy and the puppy loved the boy.

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What did the cat say to the dog? Communism

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A man named Hank, from Idaho takes a trip to Michigan. When he arrives, he rents a house and starts a meth lab. Hank is spending 7 years in jail. Hank was charged with stealing.

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Japan called... They need help.

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Q:How do you kill Chuck Norris ? A:You don't , He kills you first.

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How do you know when it's hot outside? When you walk oside and it's hot.

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My house is on fire I'll probably die posting this joke

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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