Person1: wanna hear a joke? Person2: yeah Person1: ok

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What did the waffle say when the black guy started eating him? Nothing, because waffles are inanimate objects and therefore cannot talk.

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What headphones does the farmer use? He is going through a financial struggle at the moment and cannot afford such a luxury.

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Aye I heard somethin about yo mom WAT!!!!!!!!! She a bop

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knock knock, whos there? billy i dont know who you are, please get away from my front door before i call the authorities

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Q: What's small, round, and looks like a marble? A: A marble.

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what did Santa Claus say to Nikki Minaj? I really admire your musical talents

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Penis, eggs, mushrooms and tigers

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Yo mama is so fat that: it is ruining her self esteem and she worries about her health.

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whats pink and fluffy pink fluff

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what happens if you set micheal jackson on fire nothing he is 6 feet under incased in concrete if he wasnt hed melt

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Why did the Mexican go to Taco Bell? Because he thought it was a real restaurant.

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A man walks into a bar and notices a twelve inch tall man playing a small piano. He asks the bartender about it. The bartender explains that the pianist has worked there for some time, mostly performing on weeknights. The bartender also tells the man that he may be suffering some vision problems, as the pianist is about 5'8" or 5'9". Some time later the man visits an optometrist and finds out he has a severe case of astigmatism.

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why were the negros at whitney houstons funeral smiling? because there were free sandwiches!

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Why did Sally fall off the swing? Because she lost her balance.

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Why did the pineapple cry? It didn't, because it's a pineapple.

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I see you driving 'Round town with the girl I love And I'm like, Haiku!

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How do you make a baby eat his food? Make one first

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Roses are red, violets are purple.

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What stands on the corner oof every major city at night? A cop

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Your momma's so fat, when Jesus said, "Let there be light!," she had to scoot over.

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What can hitler cook well Steak

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What's brown and sticky? Anal

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What do you get if you cross a Sheep with a Kangeroo. An abomination unto God.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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