Why did John fall down the stairs? Because John is a paraplegic and is incapable of going to down stairs without aid.

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Q:Ask me my name. A:What is your name? A:Hey why do you need to know that?

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What's greenish blue, smelly, and mushy? The fungus under my sink.

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Your mother is so fat........... that she is morbidly obese and is at severe risk for diabetes and other weight related diseases.

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Roses are red. Violets are blue. I'm gonna f*ck you with a rake.

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Why was six afraid of seven? Because seven raped and murdered eight's family.

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A Priest, a Rabbi, and a Beluga Whale walk into a bar. The Priest says: "Well because today is a holy holiday, I'll take a glass of white wine to celebrate." The Rabbi says: "Well, because today I have to kindle thy sacred light, I'll have a glass of merlot." The Beluga Whale then says: "Ooooooooorrrrooooooommmmmmmm....."

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Why do birds fly South in the winter? Warmer, better food sources and therefore greater chance of survival.

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What is the difference between a Jew and pizza? a pizza doesn't yell when it goes into an oven

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Women's sports.

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Q: What did the man say when he tried to commit suicide by jumping off a 20 storie building? A: Ow!

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I'm currently on a seafood diet That is, I only eat seafood.

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Why did the house burn down? Obama

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Jews who wear penny loafers...

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How many people does it take to screw in a light bulb? To get to the other side

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why did the mexican cross the road? To get into America. Why did the chicken cross the road? It was on its way to warn everyone that the sky was falling Why did the horse go to the other side of the field? He liked green grass. Why did Chuck Norris cross the road? cause he's Chuck Norris. Why did the man get a check in the mail every month? Cause he's black Why did Obama Cross the road? Cause he lost control of congress why is there all this blank space?

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what do u get when two cars collide... a bunch of mexican

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Ask me if I'm a truck! Are you a truck?! No.

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Roses are OK, Violets do the trick, C'mon and let me whip out my Dick.

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When birds fly south for the winter they fly in a V formation. one side is always longer than the other. why is that? Because there are more birds on that side

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Why did a homeless man eat another man's face off? Because he was hungry.

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Knock knock I don't play games, go away! Knock knock How did you get in my house? Knock knock Stay back I have a weapon! Knock knock What are you!!! Knock knock Oh god, someone please help! Knock knock What do you want, I can give you money. Knock knock Just don't hurt my family, please. Knock knock!!! WHO'S THERE!!! I am.

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Cum on guys....gay jokes are mean

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I know that a lot of people don't like morbid jokes, for it isn't everybody's cup of liquidized dead baby.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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