Did you hear about the anorexic with the yeast infection? Apparently she's really good at math, and if she can overcome her afflictions she wants to become an accountant one day.

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A man walks up to a woman in a bar. They hit it off. That night they make wild sex and fall madly in love with each other. They start dating, it's so fantastic. They understand each other on almost every emotional and intellectual level. They have the same humor and they love spending time together. The sex is so great. After a few years, they get married, and they start the rest of their lives together. They have 2 beautiful children and their lives are blossoming. Fast forward 30 years. They are both retired old people, yet still madly in love. They live in their old home, and their lives are very comfortable. Their children have grown up into adults, and are very happy. Fast forward another 10 years, and they now live in an elderly home. They are both in wheelchairs and their health is slowly deteriorating. They die.

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Do you need a life...? You can borrow mine! lol JUBIE! :()

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What did the white man say to the group of mexicans when a golf ball was coming toward them? 4!

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What do u call a ginger man with no ears? What ever the hell u want Because he's deaf

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husband : honey , can i have stuff candy wife : no husband : can i have milk and cookies wife : what kind of milk wink wink husband 2% you pervert

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whats the difference between a fur rug and a pile of dead babies? i dont lie on a fur rug to pleasure myself

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Q: What's worse than being fat? A: Getting even fatter than u already are. :o

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why didn't the black kid make the basketball team? He has cancer.

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Do you like impressions? Why? That's Socrates

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Paragnormal Activity: The confused sequels. My wife literally had an heart attack 5/5! -Awesome reviews. I am going to need therapy for the rest of my life! 5 out of 5 stars! -Star reviews THIS MOVIE KILLED MY DOG! 4.5/5 -Petlovers I literally died! 10/10 -Rotten Potatoes.

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What do you call a row of houses that are all different size? A poorly thought out construction project that has enraged townspeople.

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Why did the genie not grant the man his 3 wishes? Genies don't exist, only vampires live in lamps.

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What's worse than finding a worm in an apple? When a child gets raped every night by its father.

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Why did the snowman melt? It got tired of everyday life and decided that it would be best if he disappeared from society... His name was Dave...

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All I can say is that its not the feds, and not Interpol nothing "legal" nor anything belonging to the state as far as we can tell. You all stay locked up, and I will make sure this little geek with shitty breath does not say anything about you, as for the rest, I cant say much.

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How do you say a bad word in your language? Like this: "A bad word in your language"

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What did the priest say to the kid? You can tell your dog but nobody else, ok?

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Yo' mama's so black the dark couldn't even see her.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? He was at a crosswalk and had the right of way to on coming traffic

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What happens if you jump on barbed wire, but break your fall? You hurt your arm as well.

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"hey" said an elephant to another elephant... "why can I talk?" the other elephan did not reply because it is normal and cannot speak or understand the first elephant. And a man near by thinks he's dreaming so he strips down and runs around naked to be tazed on his left testicle an the. Falls into the crocodile enclosure. But they pay no attention because they are docile after being in the zoo so long. But he did land on his balls and is crying.

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Back in my day,we used to have Johnny Cash,Bob Hope and Steve Jobs. Now we have higher divorce rates.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

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The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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