A: I slept in your mums bed last night. B: don't care dad

A muslim, a jew, and a black man jump off a cliff. Who hits the ground first? They all hit the ground at the same time because gravity pulls all objects at the same rate regardless of their mass.

A man walked into a bar. He was treated at the local hospital with a minor contusion.

Why did Peter Piper pick a peck of pickled peppers? Peppers help strengthen his immune system.

CHEEEEEESSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE

Doctor Doctor! I think i'm epileptic! I'm not the Doctor, I'm the receptionist. You're a hypochondriac, now wait in the Que, like everybody else Mrs. Davis.

Why did the man cry? Because his mom died in a terrible car accident.

I was Writing and i broke my pencil

Roses are red, Violets are blue, Tulips can be of multiple colors.

how may horses can you fit in a blender i can't remember what is red and goes 100KPH a horse in a blender

ollie is a fag so are you

What do you call it when the Doctor goes back in time to meet himself? A pair o' Docs. What do you call it when Shaquille O'Neil goes back in time to meet himself? Shaquille O'Neil can't go back in time.

Did you hear about the black guy who went to college? I did too, he worked hard for four years, partied in moderation, but graduated with a degree in chemical engineering and became very successful in the business world in order to support his wife and two children.

Roses are black. Violets are grey. I'm a dog...

Whats worse than Justin Bieber's love life. My ass crack.

Why is it so hard to find slim fitting clothes in America? Because not many clothing stores carry them.

Knock Knock. Who's there? The Gestapo.

I believe you, if something is possible, I know you can do it. I tried lucid dreaming once, but I felt like I began floating and that was no fun, scared me. I am pretty good at hypnotizing others, myself not so much.

Whats the difference between a black man and a pizza? A pizza can feed a family of 5

Yo mama is so stuPid that she blew a man for bus money then walked home

Whats the difference between a baby and a sandwhich... I dont rape my sandwhiches before i eat them

Little Miss Muffet Sat on a tuffet, Eating her curds and whey; Along came a spider, Who sat down beside her But was offered the window seat, Because this was Little Miss Muffet's stop

"Is your fridge running?" "Yes, I believe so" "You'd better go make sure, because I put some chicken in there and it didn't seem very cold to me"

Why'd the girl fall off the swing? She had no arms.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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