whdid the cop say to the robber as he ran out of the bakery? I caught you bread handed

What's brown and sticky? A Stick!

why did the chicken cross the world becuase he had to go in the bathroom

A Nazi and a Communist walk into a bar. 10 million Slavs die.

what do you get from sleeping with a hooker? An orgasm

if a sentence contains the words "Chuck Norris" it still has to end up with a period otherwise it is bad grammar and is looked down upon by American society.

What's worse than some one spitting in your food Hitler revealing he's actually a Jew

brett is a dick

There were two bagels sitting on a table in Denny's. One bagel turns to the other and says, "So how did that job interview go?" The other replies, "It went great, thanks".

What do you call a Rhino and a Lion having sex? Pointless, since they can't reproduce

Man 1: HEY DUDE! Man 2: Go shoot yourself

what did the clinically depressed man last post on twitter? "Oh cruel world, i finally lost all faith in the good of humanity. I am unloved and irrelevant to all. I know nobody will miss me, but goodbye anyway. #suicide " nobody followed him and saw the post and he died alone with nobody at his funeral.

How do you wake up lady gaga? First you simply whisper in her ear telling her to wake up. If she doesn't, simultaneously whisper and tap her gently. If you have failed to achieve your accomplished goal, repeat step two however intensely touch her and project your voice when telling her to wake up. Step three, get a... WAIT WAIT!! I just waisted 20 seconds of your life, you're never going to meet her.

WNBA

How do you save a black person from drowning? Take your foot off his head.

Why did Princess Diana cross the road? She wasn't wearing a seat belt.

Two gay guys walk into a Hooters... They order cheese fries and enjoy their meal.

yous are all f u c k i n g dumb like rat kavanagh

What did the japonese man say? Nothing that we can understand.

why did the dead baby cross the road? it was stapled to the chicken

Knock knock! Who's there? The police, your entire family has died in a terrible car accident.

What did the black man in a white 2007 Jeep Wrangler when he went over the speed limit? A speeding ticket

Why didn't the man walk up the stairs? He had an acorn stairlift.

An old man walks into a movie theater, has a stroke, and dies as his family screams for help and attempts to revive him to no avail.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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