hey whats your name Im gonna hit you so hard........ that im gonna knock your block off

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Your mother is so fat that she will likely eventually develop diabetes.

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Roses are Red Violets are Blue Even though I can't tell Because I am color blind

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A squirrel walks up to a tree and says, " I forgot to store nuts for winter and now I am dead." Its funny because the squirrel gets dead.

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Why didn't the man go to work on Friday the 13th? Because he was unemployed.

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Why didn't the little girl show up for school? Because she was dead.

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whats the worst part about being a black jew your black and jewish

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A man walks into a bar and pulls out a tiny piano and a 12 inch pianist, which is really just his member with a smiley face drawn on it. Somebody calls the police muttering, "What is this world coming to?"

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Whats worse than biting an apple with a worm in it? Getting stabed until you died and being fed to your own children....... twice

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What makes Stephen Hawking such a lame scientist??? A: he has a disabling disease. It's called ALS.

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High school gym class.

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A straight guy, a straight girl and a bisexual guy walk into a bar. The bisexual guy is twice as likely to find a partner from a purely statistical point of view.

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Q: Who lives in a pineapple under the sea? A: Taking the laws of physics into consideration, most likely nobody

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There was a two car pile up at wal-mart. 50 mexicans were killed.

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Bob: Why did the chicken cross the road? Angus: To get to the other side... Bob: No. Chickens are unaware of the dangers of the road, and it was ignorant of the oncoming traffic during it's aimless wandering.

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Women's rights.

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Why did the plane crash? Because the pilot was a tomato

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i dont care if you rate me or not

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Why do women why perfume and make up? Because they're ugly and they smell bad.

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What's the difference between a horse and a house? 1 letter.

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MICHAEL

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How does an Asian person get overweight? By eating food with a great amount of calories and not burning then off in time.

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Why was six afraid of seven? Seven drove two planes into the world trade center.

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A woman walks into a cave, and the entrance collapses. She spends two days in the cave. She comes close to death, due to lack of nutrition, but is thankfully rescued by a dog walker. She spends several days in hospital recovering. The experience really opens her eyes to life, and she learns not to take her loved ones for granted, and to really make the most of her life. Finally she is allowed to go home. The next day, she is hit by a bus.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops