How many clowns fit in a car? Depends how many get in the car.

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What did Uncle Timmy give to Little John for his birthday? Sodomy.

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What did Batman tell Robin when they got to Gotham City? -Robin, we got to Gotham City.

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Three Jews get on a train to Stockholm. How many get off at Stockholm. None. The train went straight to Auschwitz.

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what do an elephant, a fishook, and a spaceship have in common? absolutely nothing

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Why did Greg move to the Lake District? Because his dog died and the family is in mourning.

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A guy walked up to me and said "I'm a teepee, I'm a wigwam, I'm a teepee, I'm a wigwam." I promptly informed the authorities. He was transported to a mental institution and I later learned that he swallowed his own tongue and died. Nobody attended his funeral.

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Friend's are like penguins, they both die when you stab them in the heart.

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What did one Black man say to the other Black man before they ate? I hope you're hungry!

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What did the Jew say to the German? He said hello.

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You can eat a pie. You can eat a chicken. But you cannot eat a human being because that would be called cannibalism and cannibalism is a felony that can give the government a right to hold you in an international detainment facility for up to 40 years.

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Tom: Knock knock! Guy: Who's there? Tom: Carrot. Guy: Impossible.

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Why did the girl break her leg? Because I pushed down the staircase.

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How do you get a blonde to eat crayons? Threaten to kill her parents with a hacksaw.

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Knock Knock Whose there? Lemons Lemons who? The fruit

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Q:If Ryan Vallee walks into a room what do you do? A:Walk out -Ryan V

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Dylan: "I dont understand anti-jokes"

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Why is Abraham Lincoln a bad driver? Because he is dead.

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"Knock Knock" "Who's there?" "Jeff" "Jeff who?" "Jeff Johnson" "From the office?" "No I work at the dehli" "The one on 6th avenue?" "No, the one on Park." "What do you want?" "Could you open the door?" "No, I don't know you" "Isn't this Mr. Walter's house?" "No, my name is Roger Stevens" "I'm sorry I must be at the wrong house" "What address are you looking for?" "15322 N Gary street" "This is 15323 N Gary" "Oh I'm sorry" "Try knocking across the street" "Thank you"

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Q: What do you get when you mix a joke with a rhetorical question?

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I remember the last words my Grandfather said before he kicked the bucket: "Hey, how far do you think I can kick this bucket?"

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Fuzzy-wuzzy was a bear, Fuzzy-wuzzy had no hair, Fuzzy-wuzzy died of cancer.

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knock knock whos there? the police, your under arrest

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How did the mexicans get to the United States of America? By plane.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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