why did the chicken cross the road? because chickens are very absent-minded creatures. the chances are the chicken saw some form of bug or other edible life form from across the road and decided to venture over in that direction. if the road was not there, the chicken would most likely have still crossed that same expanse of ground, regardless of potential consequences.

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Why did alfred crap his pants? because he had downs

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What do you get when you cross a Mexican with an octopus? Nothing, two different species cannot propagate and gene splicing isn't advanced enough to separate the specific traits of an organism.

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Two people were walking down the street. One was assaulted.

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You know what's a joke? Something Funny

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An old woman and her grandson arrive at the hospital, only to discover the floor drenched in triceratops shit.

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There are two types of people in the world: 1. people who can extrapolate from incomplete data And I have two wonderful pieces of advice: 1. Never tell anyone everything you know

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What did the poor sickly orphan get for Christmas? Nothing.

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I can't think of a joke.

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What do you call a dog with 4 legs? A dog.

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what's brown and sticky? a turd.

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I like the way he thinks. Too bad he has alzheimers.

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What did the man say to the attractive female bartender as he left the bar? Well, it's been fun but I hate you so I'm leaving to kill your entire family.

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"Knock Knock" "Who's there?" "Boo." "I don't know anyone by that name. Please go away."

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How you your turn a trashcan into a semi-automatic AK-47? You don't. But ask the irishman who just said "hello" to you.

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Why did the President Truman approve the use a nuke over Hiroshima? Sending Chuck Norris was widely considered to be too cruel.

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Why do christians believe in God? Because believing in God is fundemental in their belief system; if they did not believe in God they simply wouldn't be christians. Muslims are in a similar predicament.

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Friends are a lot like trees, they fall down when hit multiple times with an axe.

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why did the man die? because he died.

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Communism, Capitalism and an Irish man walk into a bar. Communism says, “I’ll buy the drinks but I require your complete obedient consent.” Capitalism says, “No I’ll buy the drinks but I require that you pay me back with interest” and the Irish man says “No I… I don’t feel very well at all… Oh shite I’ve got the bloody runs!” He then proceeds to shit myself.

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Bob: Hey Jim, if you were a caveman, you would die. Jim: Why? Bob: Cause everybody dies.

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How do you make a person cross the road? Ask them nicely.

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yo mamas like a chicken hut all the cock* fly in

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What is more funny than 8 babies in 1 bin? 1 baby in 8 bins.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

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The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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