Where did Susie go during the bombing? Everywhere

A duck walks into a bar, guess what the bartender does............ GIVES HIM A SEAT AND 6 FREE SHOTS! But instead of that the bartender promptly escort the duck out considering the fact that in all bars there is a no animal and/or pet policy so the duck went... and commitid a series of loud noises before he got to a hotel and hung itself, that is what any depressed hungover duck would do.

Two muffins are baking in an oven. One of them says, "Man, it sure is hot in here." and the other muffin replies, "Yep." They later die a horrid and painful death as their flesh gets burned into a nice golden brown crisp.

Knock, Knock. Who's there Hey, it's Dave. Oh well come on in.

"It smells like Up dog in here." "How do you know what the dog from the movie "Up" smells like? It's computer-animated and not real." "I...I think I have a brain tumor..."

What do u call a mixture of black people and asian people. Breakfast- Scrambled Eggs and Sausage

Knock Knock!! Who's There? No one, your being ding dong ditched!

You don't need to know a girls period schedule. Just look in the garbage.

What's the difference between a chicken? One leg is both the same

A black guy moves in to your neighborhood. The housing values plummet due to the current economic recession.

What is dark in the darkness even if you shine a torchlight on it? A blackman

5

A: Whats black and hangs from my tree in my backyard? B: What? A: Blackberries B: Blackberries grow on bushes

SteVen Hawking wals into a bar

Why did the chicken cross the road? He actually planned to visit his family on the other side, but unfortunately he did not look both ways so was involved in a terrible car accident. His family now mourns their loss.

How many days did abraham lincoln take a crap for? Turquoise because pancakes cannot fly without wings during the summer unless giraffes smell pineapple on tuesday.

What was the motto of the Holocaust? Yolo.

Women's rights.

Why did the chicken cross the road? Nobody knows, he was hit by a car.

If one train goes east at 30mph and another train goes south at 53mph, how many pancakes does it take to make a mattress? 7 because peanut butter can't climb trees.

*Dubstep* CHEW CHEW CHEW CHEW CHEW BWAB BWAB

Obama.

women's rights.

How can you get an asian kid to flunk a class? You can't.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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