Why did Sally fall off the swing? Because she has no arms. Knock Knock. Who's there? NOT SALLYYYY

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? Because he was dead Why did the second monkey fall out of the tree? He was stapled to the first monkey Why did the third monkey fall out of the tree? Peer pressure

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What's a cow's fovorite vacation spot? Farmyard animals do not receive vacations, they have long hours, no pay, and get eaten upon death.

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what do German people eat at BBQ ' s ? burgers and hotdogs and kebabs and fried chicken with a garnish of summer salad washed down with a cold mouth tingling glass of coca cola and jews

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What do you say to a man with no legs at a bus stop.. How you getting on.

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Me and the wife spent her Birthday in bed, if you know what I mean. We're both severely disabled.

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guess what I'm going to Spain on my holidays

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Whats the difference between a duck? One of its legs are both the same.

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What's three times More dangerous than a war? Three wars

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I ate high protein foods and now my flatulence smells wrank.

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your momma so dumb she put a battery up her but and said i got the power!!!

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What do you do if an elephant comes through your window? Pay For a new window

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Do you want to hear a joke? No.

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What is Ron afraid of? Spiders!

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A German and an American walk into a bar. George W. Bush got hurt, but Albert Einstein didn't.

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What's brown and sticky? The stuff that comes out of your anus

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What is worse than finding a dead mouse in your loaf of bread? A lot of things since you were able to sue the bread company for tens of thousands of dollars.

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While on a business trip, a Jim got a call on his cell phone. It was his best friend. He was informing Jim of his wife's death in a terrible train crash. She didn't die on impact, but her legs were cut off by metal debris from the train car in front of her. She fought against the pain and used a shirt she found from a dead body to stop the bleeding. She managed to drag herself to the nearest road crossing, where someone drove her to the hospital. Despite her efforts to survive and the surgeons efforts to save her, she died that night as a result of excessive blood loss. After he hung up, Jim turned up the ringer volume on his phone because he couldn't hear it very well when it rang.

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25

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A blind man walks past a fish market, pauses, takes in a big sniff, and says, "Good morning ladies!" to the women walking by wearing too much perfume.

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If an ice cream van goes out of business, who drove the Jeep into the furniture store? To get to the other side.

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what rhymes with sloth? -RaPe-

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Whats black and red inside? A black guy

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Why was the black kid at school? Because he wanted to receive an education.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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