Q: What's the best way to get a woman to stalk talking? A: Ask them nicely.

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why couldn't max ride his bike? because max is a goldfish.

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The teachers cat is a fat cat and his name is ... why do even whant to know you stalker

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Well, it was kind of by chance that it crossed the road and what is the big deal lots of animals cross the road. For example possums, squirrels, deer, raccoons, cats, dogs, rabbits do pretty often too it's weird because sometimes more rabbits cross the road on Easter I don't know if that's just me though, chipmunks, bears, over in Africa probably tigers and lions cross those roads.

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Q: Whats worse then being murdered? A: Nothing

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Why did Hellen Keller's dog run away? Because it could see and hear.

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Knock knock! I'm in the shower, i'll be there in 5 minutes

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A man went to the doctor and told him he was having the strangest dream. "First I was a tee pee Then I was a wigwam A tee pee, a wigwam. Do you have any idea what could be wrong?" The doctor looked at the man and said "You have aids."

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Yo mama is so stupid, she believes in god. God isn't real.

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What's red and smells like blue paint? red paint

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Why do gay people go to the beach on memorial? idk im not gay

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Q. How many babies does it take to paint a room? A. Depends on how hard you throw them.

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I was sitting in traffic the other day. I got ran over

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Q: Knock knock Q: Who's there? A: Not Suzie

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Why did John suck at sports? He was mentally retarded and had no friends.

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What do you call a dead baby who died by getting ran over by a car? Jimmy

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you know whats better than lemonade? sex

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You really need some help in spelling the word GOD... Anyway, none of your fucking business.I am a child for this scenario only so... Moral: LET THAT CHILD ALONE!

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Whats the difference between a black man and a bike? I don't enjoy riding bikes.

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What did the man say to the woman he was in love with? Sure, I understand and I'm okay with being just friends.

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Two black men walk into a strip club. They immediately walk out because they have faithful wives at home nurturing their beautiful African children.

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Wuts brown and smelly? Brown smelly stuff.

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A man invented a time machine that didn't work. Because he wasn't a scientist, he was an ice cream man.

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Why did the man float in the lake? Because he was dead.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops