can you touch your toes? no

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Butt poop.

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how do you make an idiot laugh? tell him a joke from antijoke

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Q:Why didn't Mr. Fuzzy have to cut his hair anymore? A: Because he was diagnosed with cancer

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What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? Being raped by a Triceratops.

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Q: What happens when the Hydro goes out? A: The Hydro goes out.

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roses are red violets are blue i forgot what i was gonna say my dad is an engineer

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a pornstar comes early to a party

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Roses are red. Violets are blue.

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the duck walked in the bar then he walded away

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what did the 3 year old get for her birthday? nothing she died of terminal cancer at the age of 2

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What do you tell a 500 lb. Sumo wrestler who's eating your food? Stop eating my food.

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What's the difference between a Ferrari and a pile of dead babies? I don't have a Ferrari in my garage.

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why was the woman out of the kitchen, because she had to have sex with her husband in a bed

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how do you tune a piano, you dont, piano tuners tune a piano, I wasn't talking to you!

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A man walks into a bar, he purchases a drink from the barman proceeds to finish the drink and then leaves.

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What's worse than dropping your ice cream? Being Killed

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Your mamma's so obese that she can't stand up. She's been like this for years. That's because she's dead. She died of cardiovascular-related diseases.

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How do you make a baby understand what you want? You color yourself purple, wear a yellow shirt, and do cart wheels while singing "The wheels on the bus go 'round and 'round!"

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Who cares...he didn't make it anyways..

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Have you seen Hellen Keller's dad? Neither did she

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How much wood would a woodchuck chuck if I had sex with your mother

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Why can't Helen Keller drive? She is a woman

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Why did the Mexican sneak across the US border? There aren't many good jobs for him in Mexico, and with the cost of living in his small village, he will be able to provide for his entire family of seven on just minimum wage in California. He will miss his family terribly while he is away from them, but he believes it is worth it in the end. Once he saves enough, he will pay the coyotes to smuggle the rest of his family over so they can be together again. Hopefully none of them will die on the journey.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops