What's round and cheesy? A cheese wheel.

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How many alzheimer's patients does it take to change a lightbulb? To get to the other side

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the teacher enters the room she sits in her chair and yells, "i am your substitute teacher. get out your books and write me a story."

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My friend thought that an onion was the only food that could make you cry, so I threw a watermelon at his face.

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WHATS A SHIT HOLE MOUNTNORRIS !!!!!!!!!!

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How many babies does it take to paint a wall red? It depends on their painting skills.

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whats pink and fluffy? pink fluff

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Once upon a time there was a young teenager who was bullied a lot. She died 100 years ago.

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why did the chicken cross the road? to get to the other side. knock knock. who's there? the chicken.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Cause your mom has cancer

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Inspirational speaker: "You can judge a man by the way he treats those who can do nothing for him." Me: "Hitler loved dogs."

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Q: How many blondes does it take to screw in a light bulb? A: One.

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Why did the football coach go to the bank? To make a deposit.

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How long does it take jimmy hoffa to screw in a light bulb? A: Jimmy Hoffa is dead and incapable of screwing in a light bulb, however if you change the tense of the question to "how long WOULD Jimmy Hoffa HAVE TAKEN to screw in a light bulb" then the approximate answer would be around 1 1/2 minutes if Mr Hoffa had proper dexterity an motor control that was comparable to the average human.

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What did Santa Claus say to the young boy on Christmas Day? Santa Claus is a myth, that was actually a pedophile.

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what do you call a dead baby in a blender? child abuse

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a blonde walks in to a bar, the bar tender gives him a free drink because he's a man and it's nazi germany

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Why did the boy go to heaven? He was in an airplane.

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What did the gay man say to the other gay man? “How was your day?“

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Yo mama so fat because it's in her genes.

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Knock knock Who's there? I Love You! -Harrison

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Why did jimmy fall off the swing? He had no arms or legs Knock knock Who's there? Not jimmy

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Sometimes you have to stop and smell the roses. Unless they are next to the trashcan where you put your little sisters diapers

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Roses are red It's 4 in the morning I have full blown aids I'm going to bed now, this is boring

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops