What did the nazi say to the jew? Nothing, he shot 'em

This blind man read my mind the other day. I swear, it's like he has a 5th sense!

Why did the camel cross the road? He was off to see the wizard, the wonderful wizard of OZ.

What did the baby say to its mother after breastfeeding? Nothing

Whats worse than the Holocaust? Stubbing your toe

Q. Whats green jumps up and down and then red? A.A frog in a mixer

Whats long, green and falls out of trees? A canoe. Why did the old man fall out of the tree? He was in the canoe.

Roses are red violets are blue sugar is sweet and so are you, but the rose are wilted the violets are dead the sugar is lumpy and so is your head.

Hi my names Sarah and I love baby's. I don't think I could eat a whole one though

Why was Timmy crying? because his impaled his dog while in a drunken rage

what is worse than finding a dead worm in an apple? Obama being elected a second time

Q. Name six animals that live in the north pole A.Four polar-bears and two penguins

Q: whats good about having sex with 18 year olds? A: there's 18 of them.

Why did the old man miss the Alzheimer's Day walk? Because he died in his sleep.

Why doesn't Julius Caesar ever use a cell phone? Because he died in 44 BC.

Why did Jimmy fall of his tractor? Because Jimmy doesn't have any arms or legs...Why doesn't Jimmy have any arms and legs? Cause Jimmy is a potato.

Why was Timmy sad? While helping his dad hang Christmas light, he got tangled up in them and fell down. While falling he grabbed a wire, which caused a spark. This spark lit the house on fire. Since he broke most of the bones in his body from falling he could not run away. The house proceeded to collapse an poor Timmy seriously injuring and hideously disfiguring him. By the time the ambulance got there, Timmy was the only survivor for his parents died of smoke inhalation. Since he had no other living relatives he was forced to live in an orphanage for the rest of his childhood. That is why Timmy is sad.

Roses are Red You're Black and Blue My fists seemed to have taken A liking to you

I had a date. She was a pegasister. Since MLP was magical, I disappeared.

a man walks out of his home and into a bar PLOT TWIST! he is a chicken

What happens if you're caught strangling a purple leprechaun? You are taken to a mental institution because you have schizophrenia

how much does a pirate pay for an earing? $2.50

Is this your pen? I wanna go to school, bye!

what's the difference between ya mum and a cow? nothing. by mad james

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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