What's the difference between a cup of tea and a polar bear? A polar bear is a bear whilst a cup of tea is a beverage

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We are few Nero, too few, if I want to split my money with you, would it help you find true happiness?

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Why was the man struck by lightning? Josh Mathai was there.

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Why did the bartender cry when a construction worker ordered a Jack and Coke? His son Jack had run away five years ago to sell cocaine; his father hadn't seen him since.

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How many midgets does it take to change a light bulb? If you do the math, it's probably one.

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I haven't been this tired since the last time I was tired

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What do Bruce Lee and Michael Jackson have in common? They are both dead

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one day tiarnan got banged by a goat

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Did you hear about the fetus who met a clothes hanger? I doubt very much that you did.

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Ask me if I'm a tree. Are you a tree? No.

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Mooses

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How did Helen Keller's parents discipline her? Hopefully not too sternly. There's not much trouble a blind and deaf girl can get into, one would imagine.

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if your were a slu* what would you do dance on a pole or get a tattoo

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Science fact: what would happen if you lined up all the veins in your body? You would die.

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Why was six afraid of seven? Six wasn't. He listens in on women's self defense classes and can deliver a kick to the crotch so hard that it will create for you a new vagina.

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Roses are red, violets are blue Vodka is cheaper that dinner for two.

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When Santa got stuck up the chimney he began to shout.. But he didn't shout for long as he soon succumbed to the toxic smoke and died of carbon monoxide poisoning

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A brunette, a redhead, and a blonde go on vacation in Hawaii. They plan to swim to the next island. The brunette and redhead do it with no problem. The blonde swims halfway and realizes she is tired. She continues to swim straight ahead knowing her friends are already at the next island.

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Why did Billy drop his ice-cream? He got stabbed multiple times

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What do you do when life gives you lemons? You apparently are not a fan of lemons what so ever, so you then throw them away, not knowing what to expect.

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A man walks into a bar and is promptly sent out because he is under the age of 21.

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Q:What did the hillbilly say when he lost his tractor? A: Where is my tractor

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A woman gets on a bus with her baby. The bus driver says: "That's the ugliest baby that I've ever seen." The woman goes to the rear of the bus and sits down, fuming. She says to a man next to her, "That driver just insulted me!" The man says, "You go right up there and tell him off! Go ahead, I'll hold your monkey for you."

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i'm not gay

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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