What did the dog say to the dildo? Your rubber

thumb_up thumb_down +10

What do you get when you mix a bulldog with a shitzu? One delicious smoothie.

thumb_up thumb_down -4

Roses are red Violets are blue I'm bad at poems... Nice t*ts

thumb_up thumb_down -2

A black man checks his watch. He sees that its 3:50, and calmly carries on with his day.

thumb_up thumb_down -24

How did the Holocaust start? Hitler threw a penny into the oven

thumb_up thumb_down +35

You decide, drink or drive. But don't do all 3 at the same time.

thumb_up thumb_down +6

Horse walks into a bar... Bartender says It's probably not a good idea that you're in here. You're a very large animal. Any sudden movements, you may injure somebody. I don't know why you're here. None of the glasses are ergonomically designed for you to drink from them. So, you should probably leave.

thumb_up thumb_down -8

Why did the house burn down? Because I set it on fire.

thumb_up thumb_down +34

What's the difference between a blonde and a blow up doll? The blonde is a person, you sexist asshole.

thumb_up thumb_down +25

Why couldn't the pirate get into the adult movie? He had just spent the last of his money at Ihop with his friends, and is now regretting ordering two Rooty Tooty Fresh and Fruitys when he was really only hungry for one.

thumb_up thumb_down

whats black and white and red all over????? a zebra who got shot

thumb_up thumb_down +12

what is yellow and cant swim? a bull doser what has 4 wheels and is green? grass, i lied about the wheels what is worse than finding a worm in ur apple? having cancer

thumb_up thumb_down +11

Q. How many trees does it take to change a light bulb? A. Trees can't change light bulbs.

thumb_up thumb_down +9

Have you seen Stevie Wonder's wife? Neither has he.

thumb_up thumb_down -4

What did the priest say to the child.... nothing he just gripped his arm tightly and pulled down his pant

thumb_up thumb_down +95

What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? The Holocaust.

thumb_up thumb_down +13

A devout Islamic man walks into a weapons of mass destruction store he is shocked and appalled at how easily such dangerous weapons can be bought.

thumb_up thumb_down -8

How do you teach your daughter to stop wetting the bed? Cut her best friends eye-lids off at her birthday party.

thumb_up thumb_down +20

a weird guy tickled a watermelon.

thumb_up thumb_down +29

what did little johnny get his grandfather for christmas?nothing his grandfather died on thanksgiving

thumb_up thumb_down -9

One day a terribly epileptic child is put on on a strict Atkins diet by his loving mother. A week later he finds that the frequency and intensity of his seizures have been reduced by its ketogenic effects, which provides exogenous fats for the body to burn, but limits the available carbohydrate so that ketone bodies build up. It is the high level of these ketones which appear to suppress seizures.

thumb_up thumb_down -5

A short Irish man and a tall German man went skydiving. Both parachutes coincidentally failed to deploy and they died.

thumb_up thumb_down +14

why are black people always so funny because they think of funny jokes

thumb_up thumb_down -9

here kitty kitty

thumb_up thumb_down -6

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops