What's the difference between a hooker and an onion? You don't have to cook an onion to eat it.

thumb_up thumb_down -4

Why do undertakers wear ties? Because their profession is very serious, and it is important that their appearance has a degree of gravitas

thumb_up thumb_down +18

Why did the chicken cross the road? because

thumb_up thumb_down +23

no.

thumb_up thumb_down -28

why did the blonde put on a coat? because she was cold.

thumb_up thumb_down -12

what is chuck norris's favorite food? lasagna.

thumb_up thumb_down +7

CAUSE IT'S ONE, TWO, THREE STRIKES YOU'RE OUT

thumb_up thumb_down +10

there was once a time before tht time when there wasnt bonerss there were erectionss CC

thumb_up thumb_down -2

Where did Little Billy go after the explosion? Everywhere.

thumb_up thumb_down +21

Why did the chicken cross the road? For no specific reason, Chickens don't think much.

thumb_up thumb_down -1

Knock Knock. Who's there? Chris. Chris who? Wow, I thought we were better friends than that.

thumb_up thumb_down +11

How do you make a blonde happy? Do something that causes that person to release endorphins.

thumb_up thumb_down -7

Barny the purple dinosaur has no imagination, stuck his finger up his ass and called it masterbaition!

thumb_up thumb_down -33

Can Geico save save you 50% on your car insurance? Does a former drill sergent make a terrible therapist?

thumb_up thumb_down +35

Why did Jim go to the hospital? To get an autopsy.

thumb_up thumb_down -17

Why did Suzie fall off the swing? Because she had no arms. Knock knock. Who's there? Not Suzie.

thumb_up thumb_down +18

Why was the man sad? He was molested as a child.

thumb_up thumb_down +9

Knock Knock Who's there? John John who? John Williams.

thumb_up thumb_down +3

What did the black guy do in the hood? walked down the street, bought the paper and watched Letterman.

thumb_up thumb_down -11

A man entered into a house, because it hadn't any door.

thumb_up thumb_down +45

What do you call 1000 black men walking down a street? The million man march

thumb_up thumb_down -42

Why didn't the pro-choice, pregnant woman have an abortion? It was a planned pregnancy.

thumb_up thumb_down +2

Why does no one we talk about Nagasaki, they got bombed too...

thumb_up thumb_down +47

"My dog doesn't have a nose" "How does it smell?" "It can't. It bled to death."

thumb_up thumb_down +31

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops