on a scale from voldemort to nigel thornberry, how big is your penis?

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How do you make a small fortune? Be financially smart, work hard, save money, all while you make sure you don't let your earnings become a "large" fortune.

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Whats the difference between a white guy and a black guy? They have different colors of skin.

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Someone told me about this website.

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What happens when you shoot a bear and you kill it? It dies.

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Justin Bieber.

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How do you get 4 Jews in a car? Open the door and tell them politely to get in.

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Whats worse than bitting into a apple and finding a worm? Being the worm who just lost nearly half his whole house because some jerk decided to eat an apple on the ground, whom after eating the apple destroyed the worms self-esteem by making the comparison to the worse thing possible. Or being raped by Zeus in the form of a worm.

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Knock knock who's there? the police, your under arrest the police your under arrest who? BAM! sir, I'm placing you under arrest for the murder of your wife, anything you say or do can be used against you. IT WASN'T ME!!!! yeah yeah tell it the judge

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You know whats worse than getting punched in the face? Getting kicked in the balls.

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a man walks in to a bar. he says oww.

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How did john walk on the sun? We don't know, he probably burned to death before getting close.

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What does it mean if you have 5$ and Chuck Norris has 5$? Congrats! You both have five dollars!

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What Did The Kid With No Arms And No Legs Get For His Birthday? A Walking Stick

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Why can't Helen Keller drive? Because she's DEAD!

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When did the laughter finally die? When you started this joke.

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A man walks out of a bar. Gets in his car and crashes because drunk driving isn't safe.

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How did Helen Keller's parents punish her? Physical abuse.

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Why did people on a plane die? Because it crashed.

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I am strangling you. Do you see my arms? I AM FREAKEN STRANGLING YOU!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!11

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why was the tolit stoped up. because it had phoo

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When I walk in the rain, I get wet

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What do call a man with a daranged wife? Married

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Q: Whats A Schoolbus Full Of Black Children??? A: A Rotten Banana!!!

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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