What is the difference between an empty bucket and a bucket of water? The Water.

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What do you call a black pilot? A pilot.

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Women, "Did just pinch my ass!?" Man, "Yes." Women, "Oh, alright then."

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Who comes up with terrible jokes and then mentions the name of the person they are talking about like a bitch? Both of us, Dylan.

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What do you call a girl with ADD and too much free time? Me

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Q. Which is longer ... a rope ?

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What's the difference between Michael Jackson and Neil Armstrong? Neil Armstrong was the first man to walk on the moon... Michael Jackson has sex with little boys.

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What do you call a woman that is on her period? -A girl that is expirencing a difficult to control flow of blood through the clitorus.

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What is green and smells like paint? Grass, it doesnt smell like paint, I lied.

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'Dyslexic man walks into a bar... and orders a pint

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what did the whale say when he came out of the water? BLAHHRRAHAHHAAARRRAER

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Women.

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A baby boy and a baby girl are much alike when you eat them they die

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What did the fish say when he ran into a wall? Dam...

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A Hindu, a Jew and a Muslim walk into a bar. They then proceed to brutally murder each other due to their strong religious differences.

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YOU KNOW YOU'RE AS FAT AS JESSE WHEN... 1. The scales don't go up to the weight you weigh. 2. You know the true meaning of the word Plus-Size. 3. You can't see your feet without sitting down.

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How much cocaine did Charlie Sheen do? Enough to compromise his health and career

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whats the diffference between pizza and a jew? burning a pizza makes me sad, burning a jew is worthy of a party!

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What did the blind man do in the dark room? Nothing, he couldn't see.

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? I threw a refrigerator at it

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Hit me and kick me were on a log. Hit me fell off, swan to shore, and went home.

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How many friendzoned guys does it take to screw in a lightbulb? None. They just compliment it then get mad when it won't screw.

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Justin Bieber is so gay he dates girls

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Why did Amy fall out of the swing? She had no arms. Knock knock. (Who's there?) Not Amy.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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