What did the boy with no arms and legs get for Chrismas? Cancer. What did he get for his birthday? Nothing, he didn't live that long

why did the chicken cross the road because he wanted AIDS

What happened to the girl who got an infection from an abortion? She died.

you momas so fat, you momas so ugly Your mother's breasts sag with such severity that the late great Salvador Dali mistook them for cloth.

Bill Gates, Jeff Bezos and Elon Musk die and find themselves standing before St. Peter at the Pearly Gates. Actually, that's just speculation. No one really knows what happens when you die. Most likely your consciousness simply stops, and you cease to exist, an eternity of oblivion. But most people can't face this possibility so we have made up comforting stories to attempt to ease our collective fear of death.

What did the blind boy get for Christmas? The same toys from last year.

Why did the little girl fall from the swing? She's got no arms.

Wuy are Kenyans so fast? Because due to variations in evolution, people from that part of the world have a better muscle build to run at higher speeds than equally trained athletes from other parts of the world.

What's the difference between a black man and a white man? Their skin color.

Q: what's the difference between a dead baby and a watermelon A: well the first noticable difference is that the watermelon tastes better.

Why did Timmy fall off his swing? The Holocaust

Q:Whats funnier than 24? A: 25.

A man did not like this site

A man walked into a haunted house and screamed. He had stepped on a nail.

Why did the chicken cross the road? Well, it was kind of by chance that it crossed the road and what is the big deal lots of animals cross the road. For example possums, squirrels, deer, raccoons, cats, dogs, rabbits do pretty often too it's weird because sometimes more rabbits cross the road on Easter I don't know if that's just me though, chipmunks, bears, over in Africa probably tigers and lions cross those roads.

They say "You are what you eat." In that case, I'm a pussy.

What did the screwdriver do when it was insulted? It got up and walked away.

What do you call a chicken with the head of a shark? A genetic anomaly.

Knock knock Whose there? you you who you know who you are

Q) How many boring people does it take to screw in a light bulb? A) One

How many chinese women can you fit in a car? About the same amount as men.

What do you call a room with an oven and ten Jews in it? A kitchen.

Roses are blue Violets are green I have issues, What should I do?

It smells like triangles in here.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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