what is the difference of left and right? i used my right hand to stab your mother.

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Wanna hear a joke......... your moms face !!

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I remember my grandfather's last words he said to me before he kicked the bucket...."Hey, how far do you think I can kick this bucket?"

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Your mother is so ugly that your father no lomger finds her attractive

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Knock knock. Who's there? Jim. Oh, come in Jim!

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Roses are Red Violets are Blue Violets are not blue They are Violet

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whats worse than having ice cream and not eating it? Being lactose intolerant

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Ever hear the joke about the blind guy taking care of the baby ? ... Good, because it's not funny to make fun of blind people and I doubt a blind guy would ever be legally taking care of a baby.

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How do you get a Mexican's attention? "Excuse me, may I have your attention?"

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What do a grape and an elephant have in common? They're both purple, except for the elephant.

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why did the black man go to court he was a lawyer it's is job

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Person A: Knock Knock Person B: Who's there? Person A: It's the police, we have a warrant for your arrest. Open the door. Person B: It's the police, we have a warrant for your arrest, open the door wh-- Suddenly the door is smashed open. Tear gas grenades are rolled in, temporarily blinding Person B. He is then dragged out of his apartment by nine federal agents who proceed to beat him and throw him into the back of an FBI van.

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What's red, fast, and flies through the air? A tomato in a plane.

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What's brown and smells like poop? A monkey.

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Why did the carrot jumped over the fence? It didn't. Carrots do not have the physical ability to jump.

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A man is working at a bar. He feels a fly graze his left index finger, which has become a bit sweaty. The man rubs the finger for a moment, then continues to slice grapes for a customers synthetic japanese glue farm.

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Why did the girl fall off the swing? You've already seen this joke at least SIXTY TIMES on this website, so you already know.

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why did the mexican cross the road? To get into America. Why did the chicken cross the road? It was on its way to warn everyone that the sky was falling Why did the horse go to the other side of the field? He liked green grass. Why did Chuck Norris cross the road? cause he's Chuck Norris. Why did the man get a check in the mail every month? Cause he's black Why did Obama Cross the road? Cause he lost control of congress why is there all this blank space?

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Why did God use one of Adam's ribs to create Eve? He didn't. God doesn't exist

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Roses are Red, uh..uh..ahhhhh oh shit I just came that curse is true

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Wanna hear a joke? Niklas Bendter being good at soccer. Wanna hear a funnier joke? Your Mom Wanna hear the funniest joke?

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So I said to the man "That's no banana, thats my wife!"

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What did Helen Keller get for Christmas? A read along book

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i know you talk the talk but can you talk the talk

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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