what do you do when you see a injured black man screaming in pain rolling on the ground assist him or call 911 depending how severe the injury is

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whats more serious than rape the holocaust

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Why did the chicken cross the road? It had gotten out of its coop.

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Three men are stranded in a small rowboat. Just as all hope seem to be lost, one man noticed an island covered in luscious foliage about five hundred yards away. It became apparent that an unrelenting riptide was dragging the boat further and further from the shore. It became further apparent that the men would have to abandon their rickety rowboat and swim the rest of the way. The first man bravely jumps into the vast uncertainty of the ocean and attempts to swim to shore. He is met by a large shark that promptly severs his arm from his body. A bloody mess, he manages to touch down on the sandy beach. The second man, more reluctantly, also jumps in. He balanced his chances: "100% death in the boat vs. uncertainty in the ocean." Like the first man, the second man meets the shark's vicious bite. His leg is severed and he too drags himself, bloody, to the warm embrace of sand and freedom. The third man, sure that he would be bitten also, jumps into the ocean and swims to shore. Alas! The third man arrived on the island unscathed and completely fine. Perplexed, the first two men asked the third why the shark did not attack him. The third man simply smiled and replied..."what do you expect me for, a typewriter?"

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One kid clicks his pen. The kid sitting next to home clicks his pen. They next 3 kids click their pens. The teacher walks by and says "monkey see monkey do." And the kid that first clicked his pen responded and says "monkey pees all over you."

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A fat man and his dog walk into a bar...the man buys a beer and walks out

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What do you call a man with no arms and no legs water skiing? I dont know, but that sounds like a highly improbable circumstance.

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A doctor walks out of the delivery room and relieves A nervous father, telling him that his new baby girl has just been born with great health. The father sighs in relief as happiness overwhelms him. With such great news, the doctor chuckles and continues on with the rest of what he had to relay to the father. Your wife died during the delivery.

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How many babies does it take to paint a barn red It depends how hard you throw them

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Roses are red. Violets are blue. I don't know where i was going with this one.... Refrigerator

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little miss muffit sat on her tuffit eating her curds and weigh along came a spider and sat down beside her and said hey whats in the bowl?

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Friends are a lot like trees, they fall down when hit multiple times with an axe.

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What happened when the zombie walked into the blonde lady convention? He went home hungry.

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Have you ever had Ethiopian food? No. Well you should really try some.

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How does Hitler tie his shoes? with little Nazis!

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josh Roberts you speccy CUNT

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What do you call a man with no arms or legs? Names.

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whats the best way to burn calories? Set a fat kid on fire.

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Why did the hunter shoot the deer? Because he was hungry and might starve to death if he didnt

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Q. What has 5 chins, 10 eyes, 10 feet, and 50 fingers? A. Five People.

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whats the difference between a pile of dead babies and the holocaust? A pile of dead babies isn't funny

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What do you get when you cross isopropil alcohol,ammonia; dish detergent fluid, water, vinegar, and lemon oil? Window Cleaner.

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why did Susay fall of the swing? Cause she had no arms

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Why did the boy drop his ice cream? Because he was mauled by a tiger.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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