Bill: ask me if i am three ducks in a man suit Jim: are you three ducks in a man suit? Bill: yes

thumb_up thumb_down +14

What do you call a car with no wheels? Trash

thumb_up thumb_down -21

roses are red. violetss are black. a knife would go good in your back

thumb_up thumb_down -8

Why did the black man buy a watermelon? To give to his wife to cut up for his family to have at a picnic

thumb_up thumb_down -21

Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? I t was dead. Why did the chicken fall out of the tree? Because it was stapled to the monkey.

thumb_up thumb_down -5

88

thumb_up thumb_down +26

Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? Because it was dead

thumb_up thumb_down -8

Why did the elephant fall out of the tree? Because it was dead. Why did the second elephant fall out of the tree? Because it was attached to the first elephant. Why did the third elephant fall out of the tree? Peer pressure.

thumb_up thumb_down +29

What's faster than a Jew running after a penny? A car.

thumb_up thumb_down +37

I can't wait to eat this bagel! Yes you can. Yeah, I guess you're right.

thumb_up thumb_down -9

Your Mom's sooo fat that when she jumps into a pool her splash attack does damage :P

thumb_up thumb_down -18

Q: Santa Clause, the Tooth Fairy, and a rich mexican jump out of the plane at the same time. Who hit the ground first? A: The answer is none of the above, because they don't exist.

thumb_up thumb_down -35

What do you call a kid with no arms and an eye-patch? Names

thumb_up thumb_down -16

What did the Mexican say when a house fell on him? Nothing. He's dead.

thumb_up thumb_down +29

Why did the boy fall down the stairs? Because he tripped.

thumb_up thumb_down +34

Q: What's worse than a dead baby? A: A dead baby with diarrhea.

thumb_up thumb_down +20

Whats the easiest way to get a dumb blond to have sex with you? rape.

thumb_up thumb_down -34

A kid walked into a bar and ordered a drink and then was arrested for drinking under the age of 18

thumb_up thumb_down +1

Two men walk into a bar. They get drunk.

thumb_up thumb_down -11

Why was the ghost boy sad? He was attending his own funeral.

thumb_up thumb_down +28

Hey, do you wanna hear a joke? A joke.

thumb_up thumb_down -3

in 2001 a man was working happily in his office cubicle and got an email from his boss saying that he had great news for him. filled with excitment he knew he was getting A big promotion and could finally afford that new toy his kid has always wanted. Feeling great the man walks up to the office window to enjoy the view he notices a very large commercial airliner flying straight towards his office.

thumb_up thumb_down +5

What goes down well with whiskey? Pedestrians

thumb_up thumb_down +12

Did you see Helen Keller's doll house? No... Well it's really nice!

thumb_up thumb_down -6

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops