I just flew in from New Zealand, and boy am I tired. It was a really long flight and I found it incredibly difficult to sleep in those seats, so I didn't bother and kept myself awake watching in-flight films the whole way.

thumb_up thumb_down -15

A horse, a duck, a pig, and an arab walk into a bar. The horse ducks, the duck's hoarse, the pig's in a blanket, and the arab has a can, being surprised at how far a can can preach hate in Chicago. The bartender reminds the arab that he's with a swine, and the arab is offended for the poor horse.

thumb_up thumb_down +12

What word starts with a P and ends with an ORN?.......Popcorn sickos!

thumb_up thumb_down -8

An Irishman walks into a bar. His alcoholism is tearing his family apart.

thumb_up thumb_down +97

What's worse than 4 black guys sitting in a Jeep that goes over a cliff? They were my friends.

thumb_up thumb_down +34

Why are all black people fast? They aren't. Some of them are slow.

thumb_up thumb_down +75

Why did the boy cry when he sat on Santa's lap? Because Santa's boner reminded him of his pedophiliac step-father.

thumb_up thumb_down -10

The Pope walks into a bar. The bartender says, "what'll ya have, Pope?" But the Pope's grasp of English is tenuous at best, so he mumbles something in Latin. The bartender doesn't know any Latin. The Pope gets frustrated and leaves.

thumb_up thumb_down +87

Why was the baby going so fast? It was tied to a bus.

thumb_up thumb_down -3

Brother : you see this hand Sister : yes Brother : if you dont leave ill slap you with it Sister : no you wont !SLAP!!!!

thumb_up thumb_down -11

Why cant Helen Keller drive a bus? Cuz she's dead!

thumb_up thumb_down -4

knock knock knocking on heavens douoor

thumb_up thumb_down +4

Q: Where does charlie sheen shop? A: Winners

thumb_up thumb_down -18

Why did the plane crash? I don't know. I wasn't on the plane. Its likely, based on the damage, that everyone on board died and therefore couldn't tell you either.

thumb_up thumb_down -11

Whats the best way to take the leaves off the tree? - Cut down the tree-

thumb_up thumb_down +26

Whats worse that stubbing your toe? Death.

thumb_up thumb_down +56

What is the difference between you and a brick? A brick gets laid.

thumb_up thumb_down -9

What's worse than taking a final? Getting shot in the face.

thumb_up thumb_down +17

Why does the chicken cross the road? Because chickens have legs to walk and they are not able to fly across the road, like the rest of their bird friends.

thumb_up thumb_down +3

Knock knock Who's there? Cow Cow who? If you really think about it, it's really now

thumb_up thumb_down -7

What did the unicorn say when he was kicked out of the grocery store? Nothing, dodo birds dont exist

thumb_up thumb_down -31

my uncle used to tickle me.. he's in prison for child abuse

thumb_up thumb_down -1

When you are swimming across the ocean, and you lose your wheels, what's the difference between a duck? ... Because bananas have no bones.

thumb_up thumb_down +4

why did the black guy die? cancer

thumb_up thumb_down -1

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops