knock knock go away

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How does a spider write its diary entries every night? With a pen.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? The farmer left the fence open, so it wandered around and happened to cross a road.

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What did the boy say to the elders at the senior center? Dayum, you're all ugly!

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Doctor, Doctor, I think I'm a canary! Yes, you are.

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How do you drown a blonde? You hold her head under water until water gets into her lungs and she cant breathe.

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Why did the woman drown in the bathtub? Her husband was holding her under.

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A woman was in the kitchen making a sandwich for her husband. Shortly after she brings the sandwich to him and he thanks her seeing as his disabled legs prevent him from walking to the kitchen and making one himself. His wife later heads to her job as a firefighter.

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So yesterday I went to find a pair of camo pants, And I did

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What do you get when someone tells you an anti joke? An anti joke.

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What did the homeless war veteran get for christmas? Nothing because we don't treat our veterans very well.

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Roses are red Violets are blue i suck at poems nice titz

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What is next?

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Why was Jane absent from school today? Because she got mugged on her way there, and soon after was hit by a passing bus.

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Q: Why was the little girl upset? A: Because she drank a window cleanser, causing her vital organs to shut down, ending in a slow, painful, death.

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what is Justin Bieber+ One Less Lonely girl.... A BABY

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When an intellectual was told by someone, "Your beard is now coming in," he went to the rear entrance and waited for it. Another intellectual asked what he was doing. Once he heard the whole story, he said: "I'm not surprised that people say we lack common sense. How do you know that it's not coming in by the other gate?"

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Knock Knock. Who's there? An astronaut. He's all alone in the vacuum of space. No one hears him knocking.

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69

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what is purple and hairy like a bear? A purple bear

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What did the man say to the other man? Hi

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Q: How do you know if you have had too much to drink? A: When you find a bloody hole where your kidney is.

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How do you make a black man cry? Kill his family

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a guy walks into a bar. he buys several drinks, ends up drunk, and crashes into a coffee shop with a goat in the backseat.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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