What did the homeless man get for Christmas? Nothing

Whats the difference between a cow and another cow Help my dogs eating me

How do you put a giraffe in a refrigerator? You open the door, put the giraffe in and close the door. How do you put an elephant in a refrigerator?. . . . . . No! You open the door, TAKE THE GIRAFFE OUT, and put the elephant in. So, the lion calls a meating in the animal kingdom and who's not there? The elephant, he's in the refrigerator. You have to cross a river infested with crocodiles, and you don't have a boat. How do you get across?. . . . . . No! You get in the river and swim across because the crocodiles are at the meating with the lion!

Patriarchy.

What happens when a monkey eats banana. It throws them up and gets some blueberry pie.

a dyslecstic son seys to his mum can i have a mcdonald for tea the mum seys ye if you can spell mcdonlds and the son seys fuk that im having a kcf

Why did the black person got to Wal-mart? Wal-mart has relatively low prices

Q: What's the meaning of life? A: A bush, have you ever been dragged through one? It hurts.

Two peanuts were walking down the street..........pepper.

How many mice does it take to screw in a light bulb? None. Mice don't have the strength required to do that.

What did the orphan get christmas? CANCER

What did the fat man do when someone told him he was fat? He kept eating, for he was deaf.

Your mom's so ugly that after being ridiculed for for year she became very self conscience and killed herself. Her family was very sad for many years.

what did johnny's dad say to him after his baseball game? nothing because johnny's dad was an abusive alcoholic who beat him until the neighbors found out and called the police. the dad was arrested, tried in court then promptly thrown in jail were he was raped in the showers repeatedly by a very large and intimidating black man. he vomited suicide in his cell today by drinking drain cleaner

Your mother is so fat that when she steps on a scale it shows her a weight that she is not very satisfied with

What did one Chinese man say to the other Chinese man? I would tell you but i don't speak Chinese therefore i have no way of translating it for you

What did the cow say to the horse? Mooo

A bar walked into a bar. Bars can't walk.

call me a bitch You're a bitch Only bitches do what they are told!

Awesome! I've just received my free minecraft giftcode! >> minecraftnow.us <

kesha is a virgin.

Penis

What's black and twelve inches long? A Maglite.

chuck norris is meeeeean to pain.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...