Why couldn't little Susie ride her bicycle? She had Cerebral Palsy.

thumb_up thumb_down -3

If you could eliminate one thing in your life, what would it be ? My ex.

thumb_up thumb_down -12

Q: How does 5 gay people walk together? A: In One Direction.

thumb_up thumb_down +5

What is cowboy say

thumb_up thumb_down -33

If you're American outside of the bathroom, then what are you inside the bathroom? An American inside of a bathroom.

thumb_up thumb_down +14

What's silent but deadly? A baby falling from a 10 story building

thumb_up thumb_down +14

Have you seen Stevie Wonders house? No. Neither has he.

thumb_up thumb_down -48

Q: What did one lawyer say to the other lawyer? A: Nothing, they never met! :)

thumb_up thumb_down -26

Mickey Mouse peed on a house what color was it? It wasn't a color, or any pee for that matter. Mickey Mouse is a fictional character for children's amusement.

thumb_up thumb_down +3

cop arrests a jew and interrogates him Jew. i aint telling you nothing cop: really cop pours a bag of coins on the table jew: thats about $7.80 cop: you can have it if you tell us what we want to know jew: ok jew: i stole the money 123

thumb_up thumb_down -10

What did the midget say to the leprechaun? Nothing.....midgets don't usually converse with leprechauns....and leprechauns aren't real.

thumb_up thumb_down -8

A duck walks into a bar and asks for water. The bartender asks,"How would you like to pay?" And do you know what he said? "Charge it to the game."

thumb_up thumb_down +12

What was the only reason a ginger ever won in a fight? It was against a Dementor.

thumb_up thumb_down -17

How many New Yorkers does it take to screw in a lightbulb? usually one new yorker.

thumb_up thumb_down +15

My uncle was involved in 9/11... He called me before the plane crashed into the twin towers, his final words were so comforting... "ALLAH AKBAR!!!"

thumb_up thumb_down -34

Why did the man shut up? because he was told to

thumb_up thumb_down -63

Guy: I have a penis growing out of my crotch. Girl: Hah, sucks to be you! Guy: Yeah.

thumb_up thumb_down -31

What the hardest part of a vegetable to eat? The wheelchair.

thumb_up thumb_down +1

How many babies does it take to paint a wall? Depends how hard you throw them.

thumb_up thumb_down +15

A walrus walks into a bar

thumb_up thumb_down +8

Whats worse than passing out drunk and having your friends draw on your face? When you die of alcohol poisoning in the morning

thumb_up thumb_down -2

Jesus may have walked on water, but Stephen Hawking runs on batteries.

thumb_up thumb_down -3

Why did the Asian boy drop his milk? Because he had a stroke.

thumb_up thumb_down -15

A duck walks into a bar. Animal control is promptly called and the duck is released in a nearby park.

thumb_up thumb_down +5,015

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops