How did Hellen Keller's parents punish her? They sent her to her room.

So a man walks into a bar, right?

Cheese

What do you call black people in a pool? Healthy

The horse walks into the bar and the bartender says, "why the long face?" the horse looks at him and says, "my wife just died."

Why did the chicken cross the road? Because chicken brains are not as large or developed as human brains, therefore preventing the chicken from making a logical decision, leading to it crossing a road with heavy traffic and eventually being run over by a semi.

Why did the chicken cross the road? It had the utmost desire to.

When life gives you AIDS! Make lemonAIDS!

When life gives you lemons you mix them with vinegar to make a drink that will help your high blood pressure.

Why did Sheryl Go to the Bathroom? Cause she had Direha...........

What is worse than finding a dead mouse in your loaf of bread? A lot of things since you were able to sue the bread company for tens of thousands of dollars.

when two guys walk in somewhere late together you say. hay perv hay ert.

What can never be seen by the owner, looks like Jesses mom, and smeels like shit. Jesses dick.

What do you call two black people on one bike? Unsafe. Regular bicycles are typically not suited for use by two people at once, black or otherwise. Riding on the handlebars is dangerous and can lead to serious injury.

What do you call a big group of Chinese people on Mars? An extraordinary feat for the Chinese space program and a historic day in human history, where a particular country has set up the first human colony on another planet and we have proven to ourselves that our race is capable of interplanetary travel and can accomplish anything if we set our minds to it.

Why wasn't the cab driver sent to prison after bombing the school? It was a suicide bombing.

Why didn't bob like night clubs? He was epileptic

Steven Hawking walks into a bar. Steven Hawking is disabled from the neck down. I lied.

Roses are red. Violets are blue. I'm a fish out of water. Help me I'm suffocating.

a black guy, a white guy, and an asian guy walked into a bar. It was an interracial bar, and served men and women of all nationalities.

what is a jews favorite holiday? the halocaust.

Jeff has 45 candy bars. He eats 40. What does Jeff have? Diabeetus

My cat used to be afraid of storms. But now it's dead.

Q: There is an Elf King, King Kong, and Godzilla all on the empire state building. Which one jumps first? A: None, because none of them exist.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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