What did the boy with no arms and no legs get for Christmas? Some chocolate and a new DVD.

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Whats worse than throwing a baby off a cliff? Catching it with a pitchfork

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¿melano?

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Why did Susie fall off the swing? She had no arms Why did Susie drop her ice cream cone? She got hit by a bus Where did Susie go during the bombing? Everywhere Knock Knock "Whos There?" Not Susie

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How do you get a blonde to drown herself? Isolate her in an aqueous environment

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What was the comment at the bottom of this anti joke? come up with a better anti joke

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Knock knock whose there nobody you have no friends remember

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Did u hear bout the guy who went to the donut shop yeah he has brown hair

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Knock knock Who's There Doctor Doctor Who? Wrong, it's Dr. Doozer, you have AIDS

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FREE SEX! Now that I have your attention.............

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What do you get when you cross a penis with a dinosaur? A dicklodocus.

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What's clear on the outside and grey on the inside? An elephant in a plastic bag.

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A grasshopper walks into a bar... Bartender: "hey we have a drink named after you!" Grasshopper: "What, Kevin?"

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What is big, white and hairy A refrigerator, I lied about the hair

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What do you call a mouse that sings? Justin Bieber

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What did Batman say to Robin before they got into the Batmobile? Robin, get in the Batmobile.

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What do you call a Mexican named Chicee? Chicee

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A gorilla walks into a bar and orders a banana martini. The bartender thinks this is quite strange, but then realizes he is dreaming. He awakes and tells his wife about it. His wife tells him to go to sleep. The bartender is now sad because he realizes his marriage is in shambles

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Guy 1 : "I like your hat." Guy 2: "That's my hair, you moron."

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Why are small clowns and baby's alike? They both dreadfully die when hit in the face with an axe!

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Yo mama is so stupid... She didn't graduate high school.

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What looks like half of an apple? The other half.

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Simon says.. Nothing because he is deaf, so therefor he would have to sign it to you.

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Why did hellen keller's dog kill itself? You would to if your name was, AIIEEEEIUUUUHGH!

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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