i like my coffee like i like my women. without a penis.

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If I was a backstabber, you would have been dead already, without me having anything to do with it in the first place, listen, we cannot change the world, those that control the media, control the world. And our role was the opposite, we wanted people to find their individual selves and put their talents for use for themselves and us, today the media tells people who they are, what they like, and what to eat and wear. None of us can do this, point zero is gone, its simply a matter of time, but if you want to try, I can do what I can, in hopes of delaying the inevitable.

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Why did Jesus and his friends get crucified? So they could sing: "Always look at the bright side of life" Moral: Monty Python?

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Why did the girl fall out of the swing? Because she didn't have any arms.

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A boy's parents buy him a Wii for Christmas. The boy hangs himself the next day because you need arms to play Wii.

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Knock Knock. Who's There? Your Face.

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What do the Holocaust and baseball have in common ? They are sports , except the Holocaust .

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The burgler walked into the house. Nobody noticed the initial intrusion. The burgler quickly left. The family of which was stolen from woke up the next day and enjoyed a hearty breakfast of grains, oats, and barley without a worry on anyone's mind.

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, Which is rather deceiving, Considering that the name 'violet' should naturally insinuate that the object it is describing is violet as well. Violet as a color is generally a deep shade of purple. Therefore, shouldn't the aforementioned plant, the 'violet', be violet in color as opposed to the blue color that is most widely accepted by the general populous?

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your mom is so annoying that she has no freinds and lives alone crying every night about how her children abandoned her

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A man walks into a psychiatrists office, naked but wrapped in Saran Wrap. The Doctor takes one look at him and says, "I can clearly see your nuts."

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Guess what What

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What is not a car park? Clash of clans

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How many licks does it take to get to the center of a Totsie Roll totsie pop? Altough many tests have been done, there still isn't a certain number. There are many variables involved with this question.

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Why did the black man fall down the stairs? Because he was blind

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Why cant Sally ride her bike? Because she has ceribal pausly

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Roses are Red You're Black and Blue My fists seemed to have taken A liking to you

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A man walks into a bar and sees a man with a big orange head. The man asks the bartender, "Why does that guy have a big orange head?" The bartender replies," If you buy him a beer, maybe he'll tell you." So the man buys a beer and gives it to the man with the big orange head and asks why he has a big orange head. The man says, "One day I found a genie and my first wish was to be the richest man in the world, my second wish was to be married to the most beautiful woman in the world, and for my third wish, I told the genie,'Ya know, why don't you give me a big orange head."

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Why did the farmer go to the market? Because his butt was on fire!

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What did the black man say to the young white woman during sex? you are a wonderful woman

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Your mama so fat, that it's starting to affect her relationship with her husband in a negative or harmful way. (CSC)

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What did the boy with no arms and no legs get for christmas? A bike.

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what did the homeless man get for christmas.......................nothing

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What do you call a black man flying a plane? A pilot

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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