A man walks into a bar. Later that night he comes home to an intervention and realizes he has a drinking has hurt him and his family.

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Why did the monkey ride a bike? Because he was taken from his natural environment, abused for years and forced to ride a bike.

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What did one muffin say to the other in the oven? Nothing. They're muffins.

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When life throws you lemons, you probably have dyslexia

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What's worse than stubbing your toe? Nothing. Stubbing your toe hurts like hell.

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How many babies does it take to paint a wall? Depends how hard you throw 'em.

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square circles have souls but gingers do not CC

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a white man, a black man, a chinese man and a mexican man stand at the edge of a roof. the chinese man stands at the edge and says "this is for ma people" and jumps off. then the mexican stands at the edge of the roof and says "this is for my people" and jumps off. finally, the black man stands at the edge of the roof and shouts "this is for my people!" and throws the white man off. The End XD

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Ten green bottles hanging on the wall, Ten green bottles hanging on the wall, And if one alcoholic should one day stroll along: There'll be no more bottles hanging on the wall.

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Why didn't the boy answer the phone when it was ringing? Because he had no arms to pick it up.

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what did the indian boy say to his friend? I wish you were real

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- Knock Knock. - Who is it? - I am - I am what? - I am dying please help me. - Sorry, I don't speak with strangers.

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Q: What genre is the bible? A: Si-fi

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Roses are red Violets are blue Roses are green I'm bipolar

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What is cowboy say

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Knock Knock. There was no answer.

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Why are Mexicans so good at jumping, swimming and running? They aren't. You're just racist.

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Yo momma so stupid, she had you.

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What does chuck norris do at 4 o clock in the morning ? Sleep

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kathryn atkins

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Q) How do you kill a blue elephant? A) Shoot it with a blue elephant gun. Q) How do you kill a pink elephant? A) Hold its trunk until it turns blue, then shoot it with a blue elephant gun. Q) How do you kill a white elephant? A) Tickle it until it turns pink, hold its trunk until it turns blue, then shoot it with a blue elephant gun.

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what better than getting an F on a test? getting an A on a test.

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How did Chris die? Bush-fire

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What's red and bad for your teeth? a brick

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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