Yo mama is so fat she went on a diet and lost weight.

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What's worse than getting stabbed? Getting stabbed twice. What's worse than getting stabbed twice? Getting stabbed three times. What's worse than gettin..... Why does it matter?!?!?! U should be dead by then!

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What is worse than 50 dead babies stapled to trees? One baby stapled to 50 trees. What is worse than one baby stapled to 50 trees? One tree stapled to 50 babies.

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Why did the white girl lose the race? The girl that she was beating was black and her boy shot her. Therefore the black girl won.

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Why can't Larry drive? Larry's a rock.

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How many Jews does it take to fix a light bulb? Four, one to take the light bulb out, one to put a new in, one to hold the ladder, and one to hold the guy holding the ladder

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Why are there no aspirin factories in the Amazon Rainforest? Because it would be unprofitable to build a factory that requires a large workforce in an uninhabited area.

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whats long and green? weed

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Poop swing

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A Mexican walks into an all white people bar. He then proceeds to buy rounds for everyone in the bar. Everyone thanks the mexican and everyone gets back to doing their own thing.

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A muslim walks into a gun shop

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A police man, doctor and stage actor walk into a bar. They're identifying the corpse of the stage actor's brother.

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Knock Knock Whos there 9/11 nine eleven who? You said you would never forget...

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what kind of animals marriage is high? snails because It has home and car.

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Why did the man eat the apple? Because he was hungry.

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A man is sitting on a bench in a park crying a man walking by asks why he's crying, and the man answers that he has no idea why he's crying

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whats worse than getting eaten by a bear a bear getting eaten by a squirrel who ate you too.

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I jizzed in my pants. It tasted good

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Whats the difference between eating an egg and an abortion? Think about it.

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Why Did the throw up He was sick

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hi im paul ! im an alien :D tyuioyt5rtyuikfuhgdehjdhfghjhgfjjhfjfjdjdjd i pe out of my finger :D

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What did the Queen of England say when here servant died? Another one bites the dust!

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What did the old lady call the black pilot who's name was Marcus? Marcus

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Why did the woman drown in the bathtub? Her husband was holding her under.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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