What did the badger say to the mushroom? BADGER BADGER BADGER BADGER BADGER BADGER BADGER BADGER BADGER BADGER MUSHROOM MUSHROOM! BADGER BADGER BADGER BADGER BADGER BADGER BADGER BADGER BADGER BADGER ARGH SNAKE! IT'S A SNAKE...

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I think everybody ought to have a penis.

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A mother and her kid are in a park: Kid: Why did the chicken go to jail? Mother: Because the chicken killed your father... Now we are broke living in a park and I'm gonna kill myself at noon, and so are you. Kid: I'm not doing that, and neither are you and Daddies over their! The dad is a zombie, this is the beginning of the zombie apocalypses. THE END!!! PUPPIES!!!!!!!!!

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Q:Why did suzie fall off the swing A:She had no arms

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Roses are red,violets are blue I've got aids & now so do you Merry Christmas

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Why did Sally fall off the tree? Because Sally weighed 500 lbs and it was a bamboo tree.

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What is worse than finding a worm in ur apple Idk I am asking u

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you: knock knock person: who's there you: interrupting cow person: interrupting cow you:MOOOOOOOOO

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Why did the man mow his lawn without his shirt on? Because it was very hot out.

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What's the difference between a pile of dead baby's and a Cadillac? I don't have a Cadillac in my garage...

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Why was the woman in the kitchen? She was hungry.

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Why did the rose look so brown? Because it was dead

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What did the man say when he dropped an apple on his foot? That might have caused some minor discomfort had I not been wearing shoes.

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why did the building fall down the terrorists came back

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all muslims get the fuck out of britain you fucks

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Q. What did the farmer say when he lost his tractor? A. "Where's my tractor?"

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Why did Carl the cat die? he didnt. he's still alive.

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What did Sally get for Christmas? AIDS

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^that joke's not funny

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How do you tell the difference between a pig and a sea pig? If you open your mouth and it fills with water, you are an idiot

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Q: Whats better than not being a Jew? A: Being a Jew.

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Why do Mexicans like to eat burritos? Because they are delicious, and very filling.

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sometimes i take my duck a shower, i always use cold water because if i use hot water it will think im cooking it.

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What's the difference between a Jew and a Boy Scout? Boy Scouts come home from camp.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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