2 biggest lies I have read and agree to the Terms of Service - View Terms of Service and That baby dont look like me

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why did the monkey fall out of the tree? cause it was dead...

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Roses are red Violets are blue Sunflowers are red I'm colorblind

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Q: Why is daddy wrestling mommy? A: Well Jimmy, that is called sexual intercourse. That is how you were created, and many people of all ages engage in this activity every second.

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a guy walks into a bar and finds an empty chair near the jukebox. He orders a drink and some peanuts and has a really good time listening to the music and drinking his beer.

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Knock Knock . . . I'm coming in!

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when life throws you lemons your an idiot because it wont

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what does nike and the kkk have in common? Nothing as one is a brand of clothing ie;shoes, hoodies, etc. while the other is a racist cult formed in the 19th century which persecuted african americans.

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What do you call a dog with no arms and no legs. It doesn't matter what you call him he still won't come.

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Why didn't Johnny have any food left? Because he ate it all.

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I came home from my doctor`s appointment today, I told my sister that I was diagnosed with The Super rare "Spontaneous Erections Syndrome" (S.E.S) a very rare disease that can seriously impair the victims life in general, especially the social life, as symptoms may show themselves even among friends, pets, grandmas, enemies, and even close family! She told me that everybody knows I a just a kinky pervert with bulge so big it scared girls away instead of attracting them. Excuse me, what the hell is patient confidentiality good for if my doctor is going to call my sister and tell her everything she said to me afterwards?!

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What is bad about being black and Jewish? Your gonna have to sit in the back of the oven

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Your mamma's so obese that she can't stand up. She's been like this for years. That's because she's dead. She died of cardiovascular-related diseases.

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Why couldn't the little girl walk? She was raped by a herd of black men, resulting in irreversible damage to her rectum and groin area.

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why didn't the skeleton cross the road? He had no guts

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Roses are gray violets are gray everything is gray because I'm color blind.

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how do you know Newcastle are losing? its 5 past 3

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Whats worse than finding a jew in you bed. Jake skellern

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A lady in a bank was asked by the clerk to round the sum she wanted to raise from her account. She rounded it several times, but the clerk continued to insist that the sum needs to be rounded. She left the bank confused, with a coupon consisting of completely rounded sum of 691, 88$. Next day she returned with a coupon with a rounded sum of 690,88$. The clerk asked again the lady to round the sum. The lady started helplessly to cry and said she had rounded is already with a harp, and couldn't make it round anymore, she even removed the sharp 1 from the sum.

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Whats worse than cold feet? getting your feet chopped off.

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Q: How do you confuse more than 80% of the population? A: Mushrooms.

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Your at your local street corner and find a woman, the fact that she has balls dose not stop you from inviting her into your car.

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Why did the fridge cross the road? Because Sally has no arms

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what do you do if a blonde throws you a grenade. scream. run. hide

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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