Knock-Knock Whos there? You You who? Yoohoo! is anybody home?!! Well obviously or i wouldn't have talked to you. Idiots these days!

thumb_up thumb_down -26

How do you make a clown stop smiling? Hit her in the face with a ax!

thumb_up thumb_down -2

What's clear, glass-like, and makes your brain feel like it's exploding just by smelling it? Crystal Meth

thumb_up thumb_down -13

A cowboy walks in to a bar and says to the guy behind the counter "Can I have a glass of water?". The bar tender shot a gun and missed the cowboy by an inch. The cowboy said thanks. Why? Because the cowboy had the hiccups

thumb_up thumb_down -14

Q: Why did Katie fall off the swing? A: She had no arms. Knock, Knock Who's There? Not Katie.

thumb_up thumb_down +6

How do you make Lady Gaga cry? Attack her with a sanding machine.

thumb_up thumb_down +17

How do you stop your baby from crawling into your room? Shove a spear through its head.

thumb_up thumb_down -8

what's the difference between a bearded man and bearded lady the bearded man has a penis

thumb_up thumb_down +7

Question : Why did the boy need to change his pants? Answer: During recess, the little boy was running to fast and fell on the ground. Then kid he has been bullying pissed on his leg.

thumb_up thumb_down -46

When Santa got stuck up the chimney he began to shout.. But he didn't shout for long as he soon succumbed to the toxic smoke and died of carbon monoxide poisoning

thumb_up thumb_down -7

Why does Mario grown on shrooms? Because they bloom inside of him.

thumb_up thumb_down -16

Marvin, was in the hospital on his death bed. The family called Marvin’s Preacher to be with him in his final moments. As the Preacher stood by the bed, Marvin’s condition seemed to deteriorate, and Marvin motioned for someone to quickly pass him a pen and paper. The Preacher quickly got a pen and paper and lovingly handed it to Marvin. But before he had a chance to read the note, Marvin died. The Preacher feeling that now wasn’t the right time to read it put the note in his jacket pocket. It was at the funeral while speaking that the Preacher suddenly remembered the note. Reaching deep into his pocket the Preacher said “and you know what, I suddenly remembered that right before Marvin died he handed me a note, and knowing Marvin I’m sure it was something inspiring that we can all gain from. With that introduction the Preacher ripped out the note and opened it. The note said “HEY, YOU ARE STANDING ON MY OXYGEN TUBE!”

thumb_up thumb_down +17

my name is CC im a little bit retarted but i only drink my own urin and sometimes i like to have a big dinner with poop urin and my friends urin CC for life!!!

thumb_up thumb_down -16

Yup, I 100% agree with all the jokes that were made below this post. Chad's pretty gay.

thumb_up thumb_down -29

why did the koala fall out of the tree? it was dead

thumb_up thumb_down -29

What do you call a black man who gets in the car with a drunk woman? An unsafe, yet easily avoidable situation.

thumb_up thumb_down -13

Your mum is so fat, she has a larger bmi than someone with a healthy bmi

thumb_up thumb_down -13

French people.

thumb_up thumb_down +7

why was the hobo sad his box was confiscated

thumb_up thumb_down -17

Why was the boy afraid of the dark? he was blind

thumb_up thumb_down -2

Why was the little boy sad? Because he had a fox stapled to his face.

thumb_up thumb_down +23

What do you call 2 black men next to me. 2 Dead Men

thumb_up thumb_down -3

What do you call the white woman who bought kool-aid for a black man. a good friend.

thumb_up thumb_down +1

In soviet Russia... there is a distinct probability that you will get mugged due to the high crime rate and gang ruled streets.

thumb_up thumb_down -12

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops