What's winnie the pooh's middle name? the

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How did sarah break her arm? She was in a tragic car accident. An ambulance arrived and quickly rushed her to the hospital where she was cared for by medical professionals.

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Why did Jane get pregnant Because she bought a man's semen and put it in her vagina.

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An English Grammar Expert writes a very intelligent essay.

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Why did the pumpkin stop using the jack hammer? Pumpkins cannot use power tools since they are nothing but an orange gourd. But, [for sport] say this ‘pumpkin’ was incarnate; one could assume he was done with his demolition work. He then would return the portable drill to the rental facility and get his deposit back.

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What happened to the alligator who waled into a bar? He was killed and skinned by swamp hunters in Louisiana.

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What do you call a man named Jimmy? Jimmy

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Q: How many times did the chicken cross the road? A: One and a half.

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what has two eyes and a face? the 5 year old who got raped on his way back home last night.

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Why was Six afraid of Seven? Six hasn't been the same since Vientnamn

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I was walking down the road yesterday with only 1 shoe. A man stops by and says "Did you know that you lost a shoe?" I reply "No I didn't. I found 1."

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How many elephants can you fit in a car? depends how big the car is!

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What's worse than finding half of a worm in an apple? a razorblade.

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hi

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What did the alchoholic get for his birthday? Nothing. His alchohol abuse split up is family and now he is alone.

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Why did the boy go back in time? He didn't. He was mutilated by rabid apes.

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knock knock who's there? hope

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A Hideo Kojima AntiJoke Typed by Hideo Kojima. Idea By Hideo Kojima. Concept By Hideo Kojima Spacing by Hideo Kojima Controlled for typos by Hideo Kojima Overseen By Hideo Kojima Aproved By Hideo Kojima. Reconsidered By Hideo Kojima Accepted by Hideo Kojima What took you so long?

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Why wasn't the girl raped? Cause she wasn't attractive.

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Gay people: "Quit calling Justin Bieber gay, we don't want him either."

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Why did the cat bite its owner? Because the owner had been dead for several days and the cat was locked in the house with nothing else to eat.

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i like potatoes

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Two muffins are in an oven. The first muffin turns to the second muffin and says "OH MY GOD I CAN TALK!" the second muffin is so shaken in its beliefe system by a talking muffin that it commits suicide.

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What does AIDS stand for? Acquired immune deficiency syndrome

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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