One day a duck was swimming on the lake and sees an alligator. The alligator says "You will be my next victim." The duck says "Quack."

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Why is 6 so afraid of 7? Because 7 was a registered six offender.

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Why did the man have trouble breathing after meeting the President? He had a collapsed lung.

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a man walks into a bar. Bartender asks him "Hey buddy, why the long face?" The man says "Because I'm a raging alcoholic and my wife has left me."

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What do you call an Englishman, an Irishman and a Chineseman playing football? 3 friends playing their favourite sport.

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a black man, spanish man, and white man all fall off a building. and as they fall, i wonder: why are you laughing?

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If Tigger was a black panther Christopher Robin would have named him Nigger.

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Why is there such a big box because there is some writing down here :)

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Patient: Doctor, doctor! I feel like a pair of curtains! Doctor: That's because you are. Patient: Wow, I need to lay off the mushrooms.

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What do you call a sober man driving a car? a designated driver

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Roses are reddish Violets are bluish If it wasn't for Christmas We'd all be Jewish

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What did the Dinosaur say to the other dinosaur when he saw a huge meteor? Oh hey look a meteor.

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why did the kid drop his toy? a dog was ripping out his throat

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A woman is walking down the street. A midget approaches her and with his keen sense of smell, informs the tall woman of her delicious scent and says, "Ma'am your hair smells lovely, may I please take a closer sniff?" Then woman obliges and the midget is arrested for alleged rape, or as he put it, trying to sniff her vagina.

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What do you get when you cross an African-American, a bird, and ice cream? I don't know.

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What did the nazi say to the jew? im gay

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A farmer had a horse that he rode frequently. He would talk to the horse and tell it it was his closest companion. One day the farmer noticed that the horse was walking funny. So he shot it.

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Knock knock Who's there? A Jehovahs Witness

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A married man takes the ring off his finger.

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Whats 0+0 0

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What's black and white, and red all over? newspaper...

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A man walks into the bathroom. He dumps cat shit all over the floor

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Q: What's the difference between Osama's death and Paris Hilton's bra? A: One is Osama's death and the other is Paris Hilton's bra.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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