You know what makes me sick? Bacteria

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A lot eh?

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What did the little boy with cancer say right before he died? Nothing. He was very sick, and could not speak during the last few weeks of his life.

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What did the sailor say to the shore? Ur a beach!

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Roses are red, violets are black, you better watch your anus, cause jimmy is back!!

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Seven

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Knock knock Who's there A drummer A drummer who I'm not knocking on your door

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GIVE

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It is Scientifically proven that, if you have a shower in china... you get wet

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am i invited to party? no

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How do you stop a clown from laughing? Hit him in the face with an ax.

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3 out of 5 smokers die And apparently the other 2 become immortal

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Why did Joseph kick the pig in the face? He though it'd be funny.

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What do you call an old widow with 12 cats? Forever alone.

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What do you call a dog with three legs, is blind, and has terminal cancer? UnLucky

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An Hispanic married couple walked into a popular restaurant. The waiter arrived at their table and asked what they would like to eat. The husband ordered a steak and his wife ordered a salad. They both enjoyed their food, payed the bill and happily walked out of the restaurant.

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What happens when you mix a platinum blond with a black kid? A young african-american child with un-naturally died hair.

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What's red and has wheels? A red car

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Yo mamma is so fat that she is likely to consume large amounts of food regularly.

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Why did the man buy a rope? Because he needed a noose

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How many dead babies can you fit in an oven? Depends on if you put them in the blender first.

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What did Jesus say when he was nailed to the cross? Nothing, he was in tremendous pain.

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Why couldn't the blind man see his friend? He was behind him.

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What do you call a dog with no arms and no legs. It doesn't matter what you call him he still won't come.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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