never bring a knife to a gun fight. bring a sword.

What does a dog in a microwave look like? You tell me, I normally close my eyes when I jack off

A Blonde Goes On "Who Wants To Be A Millionaire"

Why was the iPhone screen cracked? Because it was dropped on a rock.

a Chinese man an and a southern red neck walked into a country club and the chinese man got jumped and he left with no money

what smelss like crap.... CRAP dose DUH

Yeah, it makes sense if you think about it, I changed my alias back and forth from Axel Knight, to Axel White, first because Axel White sounded not only as a opposite to Nero, but also because it sounded like something a Nazi leader would call himself, we went renegade and used that in order to draw in and bust a lot of Neo Nazi`s with enough money and bad intentions to make bad stuff happen. But thats another story, I heard about an Axel Knight partaking in Point Zero, had I known you where the leader (I hope you are being honest friend) I would have warned you much sooner, but there was no way for me to know if you where working together... Since you literally where.

why did the chicken cross the road? I never got to ask it got hit by a car.

What did Zeus say to Hades? Nothing. Both are mythological beings created by the Greek civilization to explain why many things in the world happened, mostly because of a lack of modern science.

How did the girl get hit by a car? Better question, How did the car get in the kitchen?

Why are New Yorkers hated on so much? Becuase the Yankees suck ass.

A guy walks into a restaurant and sits down only to realize he is not wearing any pants. Immediately the police are called and arrest the man for indecent exposure. Given there were children in the restaurant at the time, the man is also charged as level 3 sex offender and is held on $100,000 bail. His family receives the news and become the talk of the town. His wife commits suicide from embarrassment, leaving her 10 year old son up for adoption who later gets involved with drugs due to his rough childhood.

Whats worst than the holocaust? What? 6million Jews.

Knock knock Who's there? The Gestapo. Get in the van.

How many black people did it take to change the light bulb? I couldn't tell, the lights were out.

Why is there no Asprin in the rainforest? Because it's financially viable to sell pharmesuticals in the vast, unpopulated rainforest.

If you give a mouse a cookie... ...you're destroying its natural diet. It might die.

Once upon a time, a boy sat on a hedgehog. He abruptly stood up, as the spikes had caused him a certain amount of discomfort.

what does a black guy and a chinease guy have is common? I don't know but it would be interesting to find out.

A black guy, a white guy, and a mexican guy walk into a bar. They are good interracial friends that like to put down some brewski's with eachother

Person 1: Why do eskimos wash their clothes in tide? Person 2: It works very well.

A dyslexic man sells his soul to Santa.

Knock Knock. Who's There? Billy. Oh, come on in. You could have just knocked on my door or rang doorbell without saying "Knock Knock" though, that's kind of childish.

How do you tell if a girl is pregant? Stick a banana up her vagina pull it out and see if it has a bite on it

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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