Robin, get in the batmobile

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Why did the man go to Jupiter? Because he was on a classified space mission for N.A.S.A.

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What did the fish say when he ran into a wall? Nothing because saying a fish can talk is like saying Obama is a good president.

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Why did the girl jump? Because she was on a trampoline.

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Two blondes are walking down the street. One breaks her left high heel and the other is called Monica.

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what do you call a grown man who sticks food up his nose? retarded

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if life gives you melons, then you're most likely dyslexic.

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Why did the first monkey fall out of the tree? Because he was DEAD! But why did the second monkey fall out of the tree? Because he was stapled to the first monkey... But then why did the third monkey fall out of the tree? P-p-p-p-eer pressure

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Q: What's blue and yellow all over? A: A baby at the bottom of the pool with a slashed floatie. Q: What's red and yellow all over? A: A floatie at the top of a pool with a slashed baby.

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What's worst than realizing your mom is actually a transvestite? Simultaneously realizing this means you are adopted

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Why did Suzie fall off the swing? Because she has no arms. Knock knock Who's there? Not Suzie.

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What do you call a muslim flying a plane> .....a pilot

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A man comes home from work and find his wife in bed with another man. They realize that they have grown apart over the past few years, and start attending therapy in an ultimately unsuccessful attempt to reconnect with each other.

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Why did the black guy smell fried chicken? He had a brain tumour

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How many drunk Irishmen did it take to change the lightbulb? None, the bulb was fine.

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Q: What did Batman say when Robin was in the Batmobile? A: Robin, get out of the Batmobile.

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Once upon a time a girl took a gun and shot herself in the face

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what did god say when we made his first nigga oops i acidenlty burnt it

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What's long hard and full of seamen? A boat, or possibly a submarine.

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This is supposed to be an anti-joke.

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What did the doctor tell his patient? Unfortunately you have cancer.

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That awkward moment when your brother goes to crack his neck, but he dies instead.

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Who's dumb and retarted. A person that is dumb and retarted.

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What is brown and tasty? A brownie.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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