Why did the wife leave her husband? Because they were having sexual differences and time restraints. The husband worked nightshifts as a nurse while the woman stayed home and took care of their child. The husband confessed he never wanted a child in the first place, and that having sexual intercourse with her didn't truly satisfy him.

Why did the chicken cross the road? The chicken probably crossed the road because of some sort of impulse or external stimuli (most likely a bug or a worm located on the other side of the road) in which he or she responded to by proceeding to cross the road in order to get to the other side as chickens have a sense of cause to effect in which the effect would be consuming the bug or other living life form.

Yo mama so fat she went on a diet and steadily lost wait

Why was the man lying under a sheet. Because he was dead.

What did the muffin, say to the other muffin? Nothing. Because muffin's are inanimate objects, therefore incapable of speech, or any other sentient action. They baked quietly until the man who was baking them came to the conclusion they were fit for consumption, devoured them, and went on with his day.

What's more irritating than a half eaten apple? Some prick taking up half the page with shitty copy and past routine.

What is furry, red, and flat? Road kill.

What did Wonder Woman say to Superman? I'm wonder woman.

Knock Knock : F*ck im watching porn...

WHY DID THE MAN FART HE WAS A FARTY PANTS AND WE CAN CHAT HERE ON THIS WEB GO TO ANTI JOKE SEE ME I WILL GIVE U JOKES

Why is it bad luck for a black cat to cross your path? I'll tell you in Heaven

What did the man say when he put his genitals in a blender? Argggghhh!

Reality is often boring. TV is often bad for you. Reality TV is boring AND bad for you.

Why did Sally drop her ice cream? Because she got hit by a bus.

Why did Dave not hug his wife? Because she looked horrifying from the Iraq war.

why is my wife crying? because she doesn't like tomatoes

Left. That one direction...

why did the women cross the road? she didnt, theres no road in the kitchen.

The Kidder vs Bratman, not featuring Robbing the gay wonder: "MUHAHAhAha Bratman if you get me ill kill myself!" HOHOHOHO. "Uh okay" "I totally will!" "Go ahead" "I promise!" Bratman kills the Kidder as a favor, and no crime runs around Goodham city ever the end. Moral: Totally original nothing stolen from Joker and the Batman.

What happened when the cow jumped over the barbed wire fence? Hopefully it made it over without lacerating its underbelly, thus causing fatal bleeding.

Liar liar, your dead nans carcass is on fire.

You are basically asking if I care for you, care for me, and if this could put us both in risk... There is no picking at this stage, why would I use you?

Wanna hear a joke? Zeke friends Wanna hear a better jokes? Zeke with his friends

Why did the boy fall off the swing? -Because he didn't have any arms!

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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