Q. How are a bird and a turtle alike? A. They both fly. Except the turtle.

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What did the award-winning physicist say to the community college graduate? I'll have Chicken McNuggets please.

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Why did people on a plane die? Because it crashed.

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Yo' momma is like a hardware store, 25 cents for a screw!

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Why did the Hindu eat the Mongolian? He tried, the Mongolian raped him.

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Whats a movie? A moving picture.

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Q: Why did they bury the Indian? A: Because he was dead.

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A midget goes up to a prostitute and asks "what’s the worst joke you ever heard?" She replies "probably this one

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Why was the dwarf nicknamed The Anaconda? Because everybody loves a bit of irony.

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where do cows go on dates? the slaughter house

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What happens when you play a country song backwards? Gibberish.

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if one legs christmas and the other is new years then you have a rare desease call holidaylegtosisisisisis

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Why did the police stopped the black driver? Because one of his car's lights was busted.

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Why did the girl drop out of school? She was being sexually assaulted by her mothers alcoholic boyfriend and was having trouble coping.

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whats worse than walking in to the doctors office and he says you got aids heaps of stuff can be worse but haha you got aids

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why is pie good. because it just is.

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Yo mama's so fat that she needs substantially larger clothes than most other people

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lewis ya baggy fuck

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Roses are red, violets are blue, twilight is gay and Justi Bieber too.

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your mother is so fat that she bought a treadmill and uses it daily. she already lost 20 lbs.

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Why Didn't jeff go to school yesterday? He was dead.

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Why did th chicken cross the road? To get to the other side. Why did the cupboard cross the road? It was stapled to the chicken.

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A scottish man having fun

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Why did the TV fall of a cliff? Because a nice man was donating it to the homeless shelter which hangs over a cliff. The man placed the TV in the back room on the floor. There was a weak spot on the floor and when the fattest homeless person walked over the floor, the floor broke which was a HUGE inconvenience because he TV and the fat man fell through the floor and over the cliff, luckily the TV was plugged in so it was hanging by the cord but an old lady with Alzheimer's forgot that there was a hole in the floor and unplugged the TV so she could clean the switches. In the end the TV fell off the cliff.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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