don't just stand there

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A horse walks into a bar and the bartender asks "what would you like to drink?". The horse, unable to comprehend english, just nods and proceeds to shit on the floor

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What did Marsha say when she ate the apple pie? "Damn, that's a good apple pie."

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whats worse that finding your having sex with your long lost sister? having sex with your long lost brother

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Knock Knock Who's there? Sargeant John Smith mam. I regret to inform you that your husband died in the line of fire - I'm sorry.

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Man goes to the doctors, He waits patiently in the waiting room for nine minutes and is then called in to see the doctor for a routine check up. After seeing the doctor he picks up his sisters kid from school and carries on with his day.

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Why was 6 afraid of 7? It wasn't; numbers cannot experience emotions.

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what's faster than a jet? a speeding bullet. what's faster than a speeding bullet? light.

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A priest, a pedophile and a rapist walk into a bar. He orders a drink.

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What do u call a guy makin dinner? Gay.

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What's worse then three frogs playing leap frog? Nothing that would be awesome

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Where do you find a vegetable? Where you left him

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Scholars maintain that the translations to the chickens journal were lost in a hurricane hundreds of years ago. Therefore, the chicken crossed the road for unknown reasons and died knowing it had a dull, pointless life.

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, i know where you live now I'm coming for you

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A white guy a black guy and a mexican are in a car and the car crashes and blowes up who dies? They all die cuz they all were in the car when it blew up

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A politician from the National Country Party keeps interjecting - "I'm a country member, i'm a country member' "yes we remember" says Gough whitlam

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Why did the little boy fall off the swing? He didn't have any arms.

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How do you tell the difference between a pig and a sea pig? If you open your mouth and it fills with water, you are an idiot

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whats worse than the holocaust? 2 holocausts

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What's green and has wheels? Grass...I was just lying about the wheels.

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you know you are a prostatute when your report car is full of Ds

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Why is 6 afraid of 7? Because Your mother said so. Now get a life and get off this website young fellas.

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Q. What did Batman say to Robin before he got in the car? A. Robin, get in the car.

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If a tree falls in the woods and no one is around to hear it does it make a sound? I don't know... Does the deaf woman locked in my basement?

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops