Why did the chicken cross the road? It was an attempted suicide. His family left him, he had been in and out of rehab for a terrible cocaine addiction for over ten years, and was still having nightmares about his abusive past.

Knock Knock. Come in.

What did the little boy say after he was pushed off the cliff? Nothing. He died, therefore, he is incapable of speaking.

One day, while a blonde was out driving her car, she ran into a truck. The truck's driver made her pull over into a parking lot and get out of the car. He took a piece of chalk and drew a circle on the pavement. He told her to stand in the middle and not leave the circle. Furious, he went over to her car and slashed the tires. The blonde got angry and called the cops, who proceeded to come and arrest him.

A Duck, a Mexican guy and Helen Keller walk into a bar. The bartender asks "What do each of you want?" The duck doesn't respond because is is a duck. The Mexican guy doesn't respond because he doesn't know English that well. Helen Keller does't respond because she is dead.

Knock Knock Nobody Nobody who? Nobody, did you not hear what I just said.

Why are women bad drivers? -There are no roads in between the bedroom and the kitchen.

What's green and eats rocks? A green rock-eater.

Three blondes are stranded on an island. They all die from starvation.

Women's Rights

Why couldn't the kid get into see the pairate movie? It was rated PG-13 and he was only 11. Plus he had no money and his mother didnt want him watching movies like that.

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A blonde walks into a bar ouch

I AM YOUR SALVATION! And you are my poopstain

One dog says to the other dog "Nice day, isn't it?" The other dog says "You can talk!?"

Q: What did the dragon say to the other dragon A: Nothing they did'nt exicest.

Why did the little girl cry? She lives in Haiti.

Why doesn't a woman need a wrist watch? It is rapidly becoming outdated and most cellphones these days have the time, but if they like the style they are free to use one.

Michael Brown

Roses are red. Violets are purple

Why are all women bad drivers? All of them aren't.

Yo Momma is so fat she is at risk of contracting Type 2 Diabetes.

Why was the black man unemployed and in debt? Because current socio-economic realities and systematic racial discrimination place him at a disadvantage in terms of education and employment. Indeed, it is statistically probable that he was raised below the poverty-line, greatly limiting his opportunities from a young age.

How can you tell a baby lost it's voice? It doesn't scream when you staple it to a ceiling fan and turn it on.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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