What's worse then finding a finger in your Chili? Getting Mollested by a Pterodactyl.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? because

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What do you call a politician on fire? A tragic death for the American public..

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Q: How did Whitney Houston die? A: Who?

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Roses are red hulk is green, I'd smash that ass, If you know what I mean !

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Why did the Catholic Priest get arrested? Tax-evasion.

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A penguin is driving through Arizona when his car's oil pressure light comes on. He drops his car off with a mechanic who says he'll get to it soon, and to come back in an hour. The penguin leaves the garage and, seeing a Baskin-Robbins across the street, stops in and orders a dish of ice cream. As he eats the ice cream he reflects on the series of extraordinary events that led him to this place, this time, this situation.

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Why is there such a big box because there is some writing down here :)

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a blonde takes 1 hour to swim 100m of breaststroke.

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What did the pilot say to the female flight attendant? He told her to never tell his wife about the time they spent in mexico or he'd bludgeon her to death with a hammer.

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A Tatooine moisture farmer, an old man, an astromech droid, and a potocol droid walk into a cantina at Mos Eisley Space Port. The bartender says, "Hey, we don't serve their kind here! Your droids will have to wait outside." The moisture farmer then says to his droids, "Why don't you wait out by the speeder, we don't want any trouble." The protocol droid replies, "I heartily agree, sir."

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Knock Knock .... Knock Knock .... Pum Pum Pum .... LAPD! open the door!

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This one time at band camp music was played.

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Q. Where did Little Timmy go for Christmas? A. Auschwitz

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What's Green and has wheels? Grass. I lied about the wheels

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Wanna hear a funny joke? Look at the next joke.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? It didn't. It was hit by a car.

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How do you give an 80 year old man a heart attack? Hold a gun to his head

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Guess whats in my hand. Can you guess? A gun. Bam bam, you're dead. Haha

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Why didn't the 13 year old Black boy have any friends? He was autistic and didn't connect properly with people.

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How many atheists does it take to change a lightbulb? One.

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a preist sees a rabbi on the street while taking a walk. he says hi and proceeds to have a nice conversation as they are good friends despite their religous differences

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What do Miley and Billy Ray Cyrus have in common? Half their DNA

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What's the cutest thing about a redhead? I know, I couldnt think of anything either

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops