What's 18 inches long and makes women scream all night? Cot death.

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Chuck Norris walks in to a bar then many people greet him because of his celebrity status.

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You're so fat, that a picture of you fell off the wall.

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Q: Why did the chicken cross the road? A: To get to the other side

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What did the deaf boy get for Christmas? Something like udgtationdaidnmgf

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Knock knock Come in

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why was the boy sad He had a frog stapled to his face

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Q: Why did the Mexican mother leave her baby in the hot car during summer? A: Because she was irresponsible and forgetful.

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What's red and invisible? No tomatoes.

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What's got eight legs and one eye? Two chairs and half a pigs head.

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What's the difference between a pile of dead babies and a bmw? I don't have a bmw in my garage.

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Why did the chicken cross the road?

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What did Rebecka black say on Thursday? Today is thursday.

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What did the blind lawyer say to the doctor? We're both lawyers!

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A young man was lost wandering in a field, when he came upon a small house. He knocked on the door and was greeted by a scary southern man with a shotgun in hands. "I'm lost," said the man. "Can you put me up for the night?" "Certainly," the man said, "but on one condition. If you so much as lay a finger on my daughter, I will shoot you with this shotgun." He couldn't have sex with the daughter because he has severe erectile dysfunction.

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Knock knock Who's there? Not you

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Q: "How does a monkey hide in a jungle?", A:"Paint its balls red and sit in a cherry tree" , Q:"What is the loudest noise in the jungle?", A: "A native picking cherries"

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How did the Jew escape being put in the gas chamber? He killed himself.

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Why cant steve get a job? Because Steve Jobs is DEAD! Moral: And people are all like "you gotta respect the dead", uh... Why not respect people while they are alive? Humanity is so fucking "smart" sometimes ya? Not that your answer matters...

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How do you kill a circus? Go for the Juggler!

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If i open this door you can go trough it

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Why Is Jarrod spencer gay Coz he is

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"Ask me a question." "No" "Cheese" ... "What?"

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Knock Knock Who's there? re-posession officers

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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