What did the single guy do on Valentine's Day? Celebrate his birthday since he was born on the same day.

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A man runs into a bar. He is instantly knocked out.

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Sex

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Parents are very similar to trees. They fall over when hit repeatedly with an ax.

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The Holocaust.

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Why did the boy fail his midterm? he didnt study.

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Yo mama so stupid that when she missed the 44 bus, she took the 22 twice instead

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What do you call a boomerang that doesn't come back? Whatever you like, it can't hear you.

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What's worse than being eaten by a giant bear? Hitler.

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Q; What is pink and has 2 legs? A: Not a lot of things, but a Flamingo is the closest thing that I could think of if you do not count the beak eyes and feet.

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Why did the man starve to death? He had no food.

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Why did labour not win the election in 2010? Because they are clearly shit.

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Comes a giraffe on a scooter to the hospital and asks: 'can I have some flour?'.

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What looks like a duck, smells like a duck and feels like a duck? A duck.

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Why did the girl fall off the swing? Because she had no arms.

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How long does it take for a dead baby to explode in the microwave? I don't know, I was too busy masterbating.

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What starts with F and ends with Uck? F U C K

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Roses are red violents are blue I have 5 figures and the middle one is for you

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A black man walks into a bar. The bartender says "I wont serve you." The black man says, "Why? Is it because of the color of my skin?" The bartender says, "No, its because your wearing a suit and on the front door it says no people in suits are allowed." So the black man took off his suit and was kindly served.

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The Israeli asked the Japanese guy to open his eyes The Japanese guy said, I'm not squinting you crazy Jew. You're the one that sold me these cheap glasses.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? It was a free-range chicken

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Want to hear the best joke? Your life :,( i think i hate you?

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Roses are grey Violets are grey I live in Africa Give me water

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A man with a broken arm is sitting in a hospital. He says, "Doctor, when my arm heals, will I be able to play the violin?" The doctor says, "Yes, with proper medical attention and rest, you will be able to." The man says, "That's great! Before I broke my arm, I really enjoyed playing the violin."

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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