What was the reason for the confused looking woman staring at the can of frozen Apple juice for twenty minutes? Some cans are difficult to open: The little ring bit comes off when you pull it, and then you have to work out a new way to open it, which takes patience and ingenuity.

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Why is Finnish taxi driver smiling while driving? He's happy.

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Why did the little boy lose his fingers? He was left unattended with a chain saw.

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Why was Sally sad? She was the only survivor of a plane crash that killed her entire family.

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What's red and on fire? My crotch

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Why did the white man rub the black man's hair for good luck? Because it's good luck to rub a black man's hair.

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If you are riding on a boat and all the wheels fall off, how many pancakes would it take to make a dog house? It does not matter because fish don't like tomatoes.

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How do u tourcheer a fat kid? Make him chase a dounout

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An elephant walks into a bar. Several people are trampled.

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How much Cocaine did Charlie Sheen do? A lot!

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Is it a bird? Is it a plane? No it's Supe- oh wait it is a plane

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A women leaves the kitchen.

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Do you know what hurts? An abortion.

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What did Helen Keller name her dog? A. Spot

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A man walked into a haunted house and screamed. He had stepped on a nail.

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'Knock knock' 'who's there?' 'Whinny the poo' 'Whinny the poo who?' 'Whinny the poo'

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Q: How many jews does it take to screw in a light bulb? A: 6 million and 1

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What's funnier then this joke? Women's rights.

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In Soviet Russia, you drive the car, fill it up with gas, and park it. Just like in America.

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A heavily drunk man walks into a bar and proceeds to die of alcohol poisoning.

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Person A: Is your refrigerator running? Person B: Yes Person A: Good! Now, your milk won't spoil.

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When life gives you lemons you leave the earth in search of what strange lifeform sent you them.

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how do you get a cat out of a tree? shoot it

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Dead babies.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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