why did the chicken cross the road? because it was tired of the people on the side she was on who told lame anti jokes, so she tried to stay away from them.

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What did the horse say to the other horse? Neigh

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Why couldn't the man find his watch? Because he was mugged by a homeless man and had severe brain damage..... ....and because he left it at the office

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What do you call a mexican who works at a landscaping business? A hard working man who is trying to provide money for his family

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Why did the baby cross the road? It was stapled to the chicken.

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knock, knock. come in.

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How did the Cuban get into Florida? Well he got his passport and other papers, flew in, then went to Customs.

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Paul howley can't drive, phahahaha

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What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? Being brutally murdered as you are watching your guts spilling out of your body

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Q: How much does a hipster weigh? A: It varies largely by hipster, the same way it does with any other person.

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What happened to the boy when he did nothing? The game.

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Jake pulled out a gun and held it to his head, planning to fool his friends because he knew the gun was empty. Then his friend thought he was helping out his suicidal friend by stabbing him.

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An Irishman walks out of a bar.

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Why did the Jews go into the shower? Because they had just finish a basketball game and they needed to freshen up.

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Roses are red, violets are blue, sugar is sweet and so are you, but the roses are wilting, the violets are dead, the sugar bowl empty and so is your head.

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Why did the pilot crash the plane? Because he was a loaf of bread

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Q. What do you do when you cross an elephant, and a soccer ball. A. That would never happen.

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A walks into a bar and the bartender says, "Why the long face?" Not getting a response, the disoriented bartender realizes he was talking to his own reflection in the mirror at the back of the bar.

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What do you get when you cross a surfer and a black man? An angry surfer and an angry black man. You really should be nicer to people.

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Q: Hey, ask me if I'm a tree. ".. Are you a tree?" A: No.

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Knock Knock ... guess nobody's home.

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what did one worm say to the other worm? nothing. worms are incapable of speaking.

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Now I have been typing without even thinking about that, and you have been following me.

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Why did the business man jump into a mud puddle? He didn't. He was brutally stabbed to death then thrown in a pigpen in an attempt to conceal the evidence.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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