What did the dog get for Christmas? euthanization

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Person 1: Your Ugly Person 2: Your mom's ugly

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Q: What is your favorite color? M: Blue

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My mom's dead

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What's worse than being a replacement? An insufficient replacement.

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read down and see what it is like BEFOR MARRIAGE boy:at last.i can hardly wait! girl:do you want to leave me? boy:NO! dont even think about it! girl:do you love me? boy:ofcourse! always girl:have you ever cheated on me? boy:NO! why are you even asking? girl:will you kiss me ? boy:every chance i get! girl:will you hit me ? boy:hell no! are you crazy ? girl:can i trust you? boy:yes! girl:darling!! read up again and see what it is like AFTER MARRIAGE (L.W)

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How do u get an A on your test. U lock your teacher in the closet.

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what draws the line between sex and rape? a pen

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Damn, I was gonna do my laundry but Amanda Todd drank all my bleach

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Hey what time is it. 3:15

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Why did the chicken cross the road? The cognitive capacity of the chicken is significantly underdeveloped in comparison to humans; thus, comprehending a chicken's motives is impossible. Furthermore, interspecies communication is largely understudied - a mysterious division of science that may never be fully revealed. Therefore, one could safely theorize that no single human could breach this gap in communication differences (assuming chickens do, in fact, communicate) and in turn, could not understand the chicken's reasoning behind its choice to cross the road (excluding the possibility of psychic connections between chickens and humans [see 'Dog Whisperer' for a more clear explanation on interspecial psychic relations]) That being said, the only scientific and logical way one could understand the aforementioned question is through observation. For example, perhaps food was located on the other side of the road. However, this seems to pose a plethora of other questions: Why was the chicken near a road and not in a coop stocked with adequate food? Was this a wild chicken? Are there wild chickens? Do wild chickens often cross roads? Are wild chickens dangerous? If so, why hasn't there been warnings about dangerous, wild chickens crossing roads? The answer to these questions may never be discovered or explained.

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Q: What do you call a serial killer named Mark? A: Mark.

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What's the difference between a dead baby and a Ferrari? I don't keep a Ferrari in my garage. (????)?

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A blonde walks into a bar therefore her face hurts

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Why couldn't the infant read the book? Because he was blind.

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What's worse than finding half a worm in your apple? Being cut in half by a human while you were trying to eat an apple

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Orange Orange Orange Orange Orange Orange Orange Orange Orange Orange. Aren't You Glad I Didn't Say Cliterus?

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Q: What do you call a white sheet on the floor? A: A ghost costume, dirty laundry, or carpet are all perfectly adequate answers.

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What do you call a nun in a wheelchair? Virgin Mobile

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Why did the man eat his wife? He was a cannibal

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Why are anti-jokes funny? They are not because they have no punchline and if you wern't a complete dumbass you would have the ability to read the description on the right off the page.

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who is still together after all the crap they have been through? your butt cheeks

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Why did the Chicken cross the road? 9/11

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I swear to god it wasnt me Dont swear to go its a sin !

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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