why did the girl fall off the slide? she was pushed, by her dad...

thumb_up thumb_down -17

John had 32 candy bars. He ate 28 of them. What does John have now? daibetes, john has diabetes.

thumb_up thumb_down +17

Why was Six afraid of Seven? Six hasn't been the same since Vientnamn

thumb_up thumb_down -87

Someone dies every second. That's 60 a minute. 3600 a hour. 86,400 a day. 604,800 a week. 31,536,000 a year. But thankfully- I don't live in Zimbabwe.

thumb_up thumb_down -17

What's the difference between Harry Potter and a Jew? Harry made it out of the chambers...

thumb_up thumb_down +7

How I seem math word problems Scenario: 2 astronauts kayaking in the Sahara desert Question: How many pancakes does it take to shingle a doghouse Answer: Purple, because ice cream has no bones

thumb_up thumb_down +14

What did the Mexican say to the Pirate? Hi, Steve!

thumb_up thumb_down +30

Why does Larry the Cable Guy get his own T.V. show??? Why can't I have one of my own??? .......ah...forgot....I'm a minority...

thumb_up thumb_down -9

Yo momma's so fat, she's broke 'cause she spent too much money on food.

thumb_up thumb_down +4

What comes after "Q" R

thumb_up thumb_down +22

Which square is small and yellow? The small, yellow square.

thumb_up thumb_down -8

Two cows were in a feild, one said "moo" and the other said "i was going to say that!"

thumb_up thumb_down +10

Why did the kid fall? He got pushed off of a building

thumb_up thumb_down -9

Roses are red, Violets are blue, I have multiple personality disorder, NO YOU DON'T!

thumb_up thumb_down -6

An old friend of mine had an idea. "Socks, but for your hands." I laughed until the day I heard he died of chaffed penis.

thumb_up thumb_down +2

When life gives you melons, you're dyslexic.

thumb_up thumb_down +3

What is worse than The Holocaust? That's a difficult question to answer. The term "worse" is highly subjective. It really all depends on your own personal experiences, your ethnicity, and cultural background.

thumb_up thumb_down +24

There are 3 Chinese guys migrating to the USA, Chu, Bu and Fu. . Chu added a 'ck' to? his name and became Chuck Bu did the same thing and became Buck. Fu got sent back to china

thumb_up thumb_down -6

How come the bartender didnt let the black guys in the bar Because the bar was closed.noone was aloud in the bar

thumb_up thumb_down +3

save me from the nothing ive become

thumb_up thumb_down -23

My Mom was strutting down the runway. Then she got trampled by a plane.

thumb_up thumb_down -2

Waseem is sad because all his jokes are not funny!

thumb_up thumb_down -4

Why did the boy drop his ice-cream? He was shot in the back, knifed in the face, kicked in the groin, poo'd on by an alpaka, had frogs stapled to his face, his hair burnt off, pushed off a cliff, eaten by a scorpian, lost his arms legs and eyeballs, squashed by a hippo, ran over by a buss, truck and cement mixer, had cement poured on his frogs (that were stapled to his face), became morbidly obese, was raped by a chicken, was served as sauce at an italian resturant, was done by his mother's father's grandson, broke both of his detatched legs, crashed his car, went into a time machine and was crushed by a stegosaurous, had a lemon squesed in his detatched eyes, got high on cokeawana, was crushed to death by a garbage disposer and was rejected by the hobo at the shelter? no, actually, he tripped

thumb_up thumb_down -1

Where does Frosty the Snowman keep his money? He doesn't keep it. His lifespan is too short to make significant compound intrest.

thumb_up thumb_down +8

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops