Q: what happens if a black guy says hi person? A: he says hi person

thumb_up thumb_down -17

Guess what What

thumb_up thumb_down -10

Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? It was dead.. Why did the 2nd monkey fall out of the tree? It was stapled to the first moneky.. Why did the 3rd monkey fall out of the tree? It thought it was a game.. Why did the 4th monkey fall out of the tree? Peer pressure..

thumb_up thumb_down

Why was 6 afraid of 7? Because 7 was a cannibal and like to burn people.

thumb_up thumb_down +15

How do you make money? Kill babies and sell them.

thumb_up thumb_down -12

What do you call a black guy selling drugs? A pharmacist.

thumb_up thumb_down -29

knock, knock who's their? police get down on the ground!

thumb_up thumb_down -22

Yo momma so fat, she has large amount of fat deposited in her body

thumb_up thumb_down -19

What's the difference between a pile of dead babies and a mountainous mound of slain human offspring? There is none, the second is conferred to the subject of a conversation using a highly advanced vernacular.

thumb_up thumb_down +12

A man walked into a bar, he was meeting his friends but was half an hour early, so he went down the road and got a burger. He had recently began dieting to maintain a healthy weight, but had trouble with self control. 20 years later he would gamble away his life savings and then go onto live a lonely and unfulfilled life.

thumb_up thumb_down -27

Whats green and has wheels? Grass, I lied about the wheels.

thumb_up thumb_down +25,619

What is worse than mistaking a bottle of blood for ketchup? Mistaking a bottle of "sticky white stuff" for milk... Moral: If you are a straight man that is... As for women meh... lie all you want ladies...

thumb_up thumb_down +1

Knock Knock Who's There? Jehovah's Witness

thumb_up thumb_down +24

A Jewish boy walks up to his father and says: Dad, can I borrow 50 dollars? The dad responds: 40 dollars?!? What are you going to do with 30 dollars?!?

thumb_up thumb_down -10

How do you keep children off your front lawn? Molest them.

thumb_up thumb_down +20

Two colleague janitors sit next to each other in the coffee room, one says to the other: About yesterday... I checked three times and it looks pretty normal. Sorry... I wasn't around to hear the question the other posed the day before, but I heard it's supposed to be pretty funny with this answer. So... Less is better then none, right?

thumb_up thumb_down -4

Ask me if i am a tree? "Are you a tree" No.

thumb_up thumb_down -2

Two colleague janitors sit next to each other in the coffee room, one says to the other: About yesterday... I checked three times and it looks pretty normal. Sorry... I wasn't around to hear the question the other posed the day before, but I heard it's supposed to be pretty funny with this answer. So... Less is better then none, right?

thumb_up thumb_down -6

A black man walks in to a 7 Eleven with a gun in his left pocket. He innocently walks over to the place where they keep all the hostess treats, and decides to purchase a pack of crumb donuts. The gun was purely for self defense, it was a bad neighborhood.

thumb_up thumb_down -30

So a hispanic man and a black man jump from a tree, which one hits the ground first? The hispanic man, the rope caught the black man.

thumb_up thumb_down -16

What did the Ethiopian eat for dinner? Nothing

thumb_up thumb_down +40

Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? It was dead.

thumb_up thumb_down -13

what does rhinoceros and tomato have in common? Neither one can ride a bicycle.

thumb_up thumb_down +509

the best thing about an anti-joke is when the punch line doesn't hit you, you feel no pain

thumb_up thumb_down +22

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops