What would you do when pigs fly? Pigs cannot fly, therefore this question is impractical.

thumb_up thumb_down -29

Your moms so fat She should get some help because there's nothing good about being fat

thumb_up thumb_down -8

What doesn't kill you makes you injured

thumb_up thumb_down -26

Roses are red violates are blue, matty is gay, sebby is too

thumb_up thumb_down +11

A black man owns his own night club. He tells the white man to look out for his night club. The white man bangs his head. The black man says, I told you to look out, you have now bumped into my big club that I take out at night time.

thumb_up thumb_down +33

The only thing you need to call a woman that starts with "B" is "Beautiful" Biitches love to be called beautiful

thumb_up thumb_down +22

Why did the chicken cross the road? It didn't, chickens aren't capable of crossing roads without being involved in a car accident.

thumb_up thumb_down -11

What happens when you give someone a free chocolate bar? ThEeyroast it and vapourise it intheir hands....no they eat it

thumb_up thumb_down +28

If you make an anti joke out of an existing anti joke, does it become a new anti joke? Yes. No.

thumb_up thumb_down -18

Why was the crazy person allowed to leave the asylum? The ombusman's report will be on your desk this morning minister.

thumb_up thumb_down -14

Haha, I get it..

thumb_up thumb_down -12

- Knock Knock - Whos there? - No one

thumb_up thumb_down +18

Whats worse than getting raped by jack the ripper? Getting fingered by captain hook.

thumb_up thumb_down +36

yeyeyeyeye live action

thumb_up thumb_down -25

Why were black people mad about slavery? Because they didn't get paid in gum! Holt9 ;P

thumb_up thumb_down -23

Why weren't u sad when your sister died? You lived in a hut and were supplied with food for a week

thumb_up thumb_down

It takes a minute to know somebody, an hour to fall in love, but a lifetime to forget. Once, my mom forgot me at Disney World.

thumb_up thumb_down -9

What is the main contrast about different banks? None, they all take your money!

thumb_up thumb_down +21

A man named Joe has practiced drawing cartoon characters his entire life. When Joe turns 15 he decides to enter a local drawing competeiton. Joe works very hard drawing his cartoon and finally finishes. When it is the time to hand in his drawing his drawing, he hands it in an receives a satisfying 2nd place and continues on with his life. Two years later Joe decides to enter another drawing competeiton (this one much more competitive) after his drawing skills have tremendously increased. He begins drawing and is 3/4 of the way finished when Joe is brutally murdered by a mentally disturbed man and cannot hand in his art work and is therefore disqualified from the competeiton and loses.

thumb_up thumb_down -4

Your mamas so fat, that any level of physical exercise is strenuous, but also mentally challenging, as she feels that there is a negative astigmatism attached to sweaty, red-faced overweight individuals trying to burn those pounds. This in turn makes her ashamed of the gastronomically decadent life she once lived, and so she doesn't have the confidence to try and reverse the damage she did during those insecure teenage years, instead comforting herself with the sugary, fatty bane of her life. She therefore lives in a vicious circle, angry at herself and the society that won't accept her. But remaining incredibly, repulsively fat.

thumb_up thumb_down +7

Knock Knock. Who's there? Your roommate, I forgot my keys.

thumb_up thumb_down -18

Soo if ur on a jet ski and the wheels fall off, how many pancakes does it take to cover a doghouse? Pickle.

thumb_up thumb_down +9

What black and has children A black man

thumb_up thumb_down -6

Q: Why does a zebra have stripes? A: Because Sarah Jessica Parker is a horse.

thumb_up thumb_down -20

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops