what sits in the corner of a room and gets smaller and smaller? a baby combing its hair with a potato peeler

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A: Do you want to hear a joke? B: Sure. A: Do you want to hear a short one or a long one? B: uh... a short one. A: joke. Do you want to hear a long one? joooooooke.

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Knock Knock Who's There? Dave Dave, who? Jerry, just let me in already Two months later, Dave was convicted on charges of home invasion and the murder of Jerry Jones without bail.

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An alligator crawled into a bar Animal control is promptly called and he is released in a nearby lake

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Why didn't the man answer the Anti Joke? He had a severe mental disorder and was therefore incapable of speech.

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Roses are red, Violets are dead, I've climbed through your window, I'm under your bed.

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Your moms so fat She should get some help because there's nothing good about being fat

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Why was the black man escorted from the bar? Because the bartender was racist.

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Why did the boy fall off the swing? Because he had no arms.

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This is on of those few moments where my guts and attitude leave me feeling as if the entire world is against me... ...Then I cant help but to smirk and think... The world against me? Finally a worthy challenge... Such a great day... Nero because fuck morals: Friends and not so friends do not call me Black Metal because I listen to power rock, my mother high on drugs attacked my wife claiming she was Satan, I killed my angel dust empowered mother, felt as if the world was against me... ...Such a great day... "I killed my father too but you dont hear me whining about it!" And of course... ...Rest in pieces oh "dear" mother", at least you did one good thing, you gave birth to your undertaker, while I killed you to end my lifelong misery, My only regret is ending yours... Now I request you all think I am a monster and pretend we live in a world where all parents are nice and good... You already deluded yourself? Perhaps you should thumb me up instead then.

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why was the dog barking?? bryan is a douche..... get it troupe.

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What did the white boy say to the black boy? You're black

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What's worse than holocaust jokes? The Rwandam Genocide.

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A man tells his wife to leave the kitchen

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What is full of water and drowning people A pool

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Why is the ground wet It rained

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What's the difference between a cat and a banana? Bananas don't scream as much when you peel them.

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How do you wake up a black man? Punch him in the face.

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How many Jews foes it take to screw in a lightbulb? 1...like... I'm confused that you... I mean screwing in a lightbulb isn't that hard.

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i named my son Frodo because he was little

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Why did the girl fall off the swings? -because she had no arms

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because it wanted to.

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a ab

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Why is Short Circuit the best movie ever made? Because it tastes like lemons

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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