A man walked into a bar. He was accused of being to drunk to drive so someone called a cab for him and he was forced to leave.

What would Osama Bin Laden be doing if he were alive today? Drowning

You wanna know something that's totally out of this world? The moon.

How do you become a superhero? Eat 10 buckets of KFC.

Q: What did the man ask the waiter when he was seated at Cracker Barrel? A: May I please have more golf tees?

Women's Rights

I like my coffee how I like my women Without a penis

"What was the hardest thing about that kid getting killed by that bus." "What?" "My dick"

Little johnny raised his hand one day in class and asked if he could use the restroom. The teacher said he had to say the abc's first. Johnny successfully recited the abc's and then proceeded to use the restroom.

How do you get two whales in a car? You can't. Whales are very large creatures and cannot fit into anything that size.

Why can't Helen Keller drive? Because she's a woman.

whats 2+2? 4

Q: What's the difference between a trampoline and a baby? A: I take off my shoes when I jump on a trampoline.

Knock knock Who's there? That that that. What makes you say that?

What happened to Kurt Cobain? He committed suicide. He shot himself in the head with a shotgun and then he died.

why navy seals ? they shot osoma bin laden in the face...... multiple times

What did the muffin, say to the other muffin? Nothing. Because muffin's are inanimate objects, therefore incapable of speech, or any other sentient action. They baked quietly until the man who was baking them came to the conclusion they were fit for consumption, devoured them, and went on with his day.

Q: You know what never gets old? A: The kids in a school shooting

Lol, thats funny, sorry for asking, but is your eye doing better? Was their IQ test the same one you get when you enter their site?

Why does Santa Clause not have children? Because he only "comes" once a year

How many cows does it take to swim on land? 4.2

How many chinese women can you fit in a car? About the same amount as men.

What do you call a remote that does not work? a remote that does not work.

Why did the boy fall off the swing? Because while he was swinging, his friends dared him to jump off and called him a chicken when he didn't. Still hesitant, he tried to jump off, but his arm caught on the swing chain and he fell face first into the tanbark. He needs reconstructive surgery to repair his face.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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