2 moose sitting in a tree, suddenly there came a boat and landed in the tree next to them, then said one of the moose, he probably lives there

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Your mama so fat she often lays awake at night wondering if you father is happy with their sex life. He isn't.

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Roses are red, violets are blue I have Alzheimers Roses are red, violets are blue I have Alzheimers

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How many pairs of jordans does your dad have? None, he lost both his legs in vietnam.

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Why was Samantha crying? Because her hair got stuck in a fan.

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What do you call a Mexican that crossed the border. An Illegal Immigrant.

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Knock, knock. Who's there? Boo. Boo who? Don't cry, it's only a joke. It's not that, my wife and son were just killed in a drunk driving accident.

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In the middle of english class, Little Timmy raised his hand and asked "Can I use the restroom" The english teacher said " I don't know, CAN you?" Little Timmy said "When I was using "can" I was using its secondary model form as a verbal modifier asking for permission, as opposed to expressing an ability. I thought since you were a teacher you'd know that. My bad. MAY I use the restroom?

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Why can't you hear a pterodactyl go to the bathroom? Dinosaurs are extinct.

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How many Jews does it take to screw in a light bulb? You wouldn't be able to count them if it were dark.

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Roses are red, Violets are purple

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Who is the fastest man on earth? To get to the other side.

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Hey diddle diddle, the cat and the fiddle, the cow jumped over the moon. It burnt up on re-entry

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An Indian child is born with three arms. After being ridiculed his whole life he kills himself at age 19.

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Why are black people so good at basketball? Hard work and dedication

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Whats the difference between a black guy and a bucket of shit? A black man is a life form, more specifically a homosapian, while the bucket, as well as the shit, is an inanimate object.

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how do you starve a black man? hide his food stamps in his work boots.

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Two men walk into a bar. The third one ducks.

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, Not a blind guy.

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Fortunately," said the snooty maître d', "we'll let you come in without a Thai.

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An owl and a squirrel are sitting in a tree, watching a farmer go by. The owl turns to the squirrel and says nothing, because owls can’t talk. The owl then eats the squirrel because it’s a bird of prey.

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How do you kill zombie Jesus? You can't.

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You should really respect vegetables more. They rock. They're all like... AAAHH!!!... and I'm all like... DUDE! THAT'S SO INCREDIBLY RANDOM!... and seriously, you should respect da veggies!

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What did 4 Year Old Jonny get for his birthday? Death.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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