death drives to the bus stop where 3 pensioners are waiting for a bus to london, and says GET IN THE VAN!

What do you tell a black man walking down the street with a suspicious look to him. Hey, how's it going?

What's white or grey or brown or green or black or yellow or purple ? Could be almost anything, really.

What do you call a whale driving a plane? A horibble massacre.

So a horse walks into a bar.. and breaks both its front legs. The owner has to shoot it because it can't race anymore

What do you get when you post the same thing a million times? Hate

Whats better than throwing a baby off a cliff? Catching it with a pitchfork. Whats better than catching a baby with a pitchfork? Eating it afterwords.

Why was the elf sad Because a polar bear ate his family

Your mom is so old, she was able to have children around the time you were born.

Why couldnt rex bark??? because he was a fish!

What do you call flashlight in an Asian kids room what ever the brand is

Knock Knock Who's There? Due to the fact that the man asked who's there instead of promptly opening the door, the women on the other side was raped and killed, because she went to that house to seek help.

-Whats not funny and has wheels? >What? -The Holocaust... I was lying about the wheels

the economy.

What do a duck and a bicycle have in common? They both have handlebars, except for the duck.

What is worse than ten dead babies nailed to a tree? The holocaust.

What kind of key can unlock a banana? Basically any key that is sharp enough.

- Knock Knock. - Who is it? - I am - I am what? - I am dying please help me. - Sorry, I don't speak with strangers.

Why was Jimmy sad? Because he has a frog stapled to his forehead

Knock, knock. "Who's there?" "Jehovah's Witness." "Jehovah's witness, who?" "Just Jehovah's Witness. Your doorbell is not working."

why does chuck norris not have a middle name? because his parents didn't want him to have one.

Knock Knock! Oh god Johnny, someones at the door! Hide the heroin and bail man, BAIL!!!

Why are black people afraid of lawn mowers? Because whenever you start it, it says run nigga nigga.

What happened after Peter broke his toe? He went into cardiac arrest and died.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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