How do you cut the sea in half? You can't. There are an odd amount of letters. You would have to jeopardize the "e", but then it would no longer be "sea".

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Whats Black and White and Red all over? A white boy who just got jumped, with sever bruises left lying in a pool of his own blood.

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Why do midgets laugh when they run? Because the grass tickles their balls.

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A blind man walks into a bar No literally he does, he has a guide dog and everything, he's a capable member of society, don't be rude.

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Why couldn't the Egyptian pharaoh solve the Rubik's Cube? He didn't know how.

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A woman walks into a bar.

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What do you call a giraffe without a neck? Dead.

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poo

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Hey, you must be a parking ticket. Because you are on the windshield of my car.

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Check out our iPhone App!

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Your mumma is so fat that she wears large clothes.

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How do you register on webkinz? You put a rope around a durable shower neck, & then hang yourself with it.

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how many dirty stinkin apes does it take to put in a lightbulb? 3 dirty stinkin apes, 1 dirty stinkin ape to put in the lightbulb and 2 dirty stinkin apes to throw feces at each other

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Todays word of the day, is "legs" lets head back to your place and spread the word....

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why couldn't the little boy sleep? he was being tortured.

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Friend: "Hey man! Did you hear about the kid who bought the last hamster at the pet shop? Other friend: "No..." Friend: "Oh, well he shot himself last night."

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A man said to his friend that he looks like his mom died. the other man started to cry due to the fact that it was acctually his dad

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Whats the difference between a monkey and a baby? Eating a baby tastes better with saltines.

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Whats why was the 18 year old boy scared of his dad? Cause his dad butt raped him when he was 7.

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Q: Why did the chicken cross the road? A: So it could get hit by a car, to prove that chickens have free will, and have every right to cross a road without any particualar reason.

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what did the girl say when she lost her shoe where is my shoe

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Knock knock. Who's there? Alzheimer. Alzheimer who? Knock knock.

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No. Yes.

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So a guy and his monkey walk into a bar I don't remember the rest of the joke but you mom is a whore

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops