"I had angry birds before it was cool." -Alfred Hitchcock

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What's the different between a blond and a brunette? Blondes taste better when cut into small pieces and fried in a skillet.

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i said wut wut in the butt!

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Yes!

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three gay men were sitting in a hottub. a condom floats to the surface. why the hell were you watching them?

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The government

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How do you get a guitar player to play softer? Ask them politely to turn down their volume.

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Whats the difference between a Ferrari and 1,000 babies? The Ferrari is expensive and the babies are in a nice hospital.

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Suck pussy

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Knock Knock Who's there? The police. The police who? Sir, your wife has been killed. Please open the door so that we may discuss this matter. The man then opens the door and listens to the tale of how a disgruntled worker opened fire in a grocery store, killing 13 people including his wife. Unable to cope with this and the fact both his parents passed away earlier that year he later hangs himself soon after the police leave.

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Why did the man take off all his clothes? He was going to take a shower.

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What do you call a man wearing a fedora doing the moonwalk? A man wearing a fedora doing the moonwalk.

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Henry: Say the word "really". Moe: Really. Henry: Now say the word "really" with sarcasm. Moe: Really? Henry: More sarcasm! I want you to be very sarcastic! Moe: Oh really??? Henry: There ya go!

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Whats worse than the Holocaust? Jews

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What did Batman say to Robin before he got in the car? Robin, get in the car.

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Is Yered a dumbass? YA

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Why did the Mexican choose the blue marker over the green one? Because he his favorite color was green, and it was Opposite Day.

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rose are red violets should be purple

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Roses are red Violets are blue Urine is yellowish and shit is usually brown... That's it, I was just remembering the colors of some stuffs

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if ruddell was gay what would he be? a gay prick

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Whats green, furry and it stole christmas? A Robber with a Christmas tree on his back

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What is the diffrence between a monkey... An apple because the more the much. :) :| :| :|

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Why can't Helen Keller hear or talk straight? Because she's dead

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A feminist walked into a bar and had her period

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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