what is brown and wet? Muddy water

thumb_up thumb_down -24

Why does the Anti-Joke site suck? Because it's not funny.

thumb_up thumb_down -15

A blonde keeps walking down her driveway to her mailbox.Finally, her neighbor asks, "Why?" The blonde replies, "The computer says I've got mail."

thumb_up thumb_down +13

A duck walks into a bar and the bartender asks "What'll you have?" and the duck says "Quack". The bartender is then promptly fired and committed to the nearest mental institution for thinking that ducks can talk and order beer.

thumb_up thumb_down -9

What do u call a banana? A banana......

thumb_up thumb_down -24

What does Adolf Hitler hate more than Jews? Nothing.

thumb_up thumb_down +5

Roses are red violets are red, the grass is red Holy crap! My yard is on fire!

thumb_up thumb_down +20

whats funnier than 24? your grammar, its more funny thank you.

thumb_up thumb_down -17

How can you confuse a blonde? Give her a calculus worksheet that she hasn't learned how to do.

thumb_up thumb_down +8

a horse walks into a bar the bartender says"what can i get for you Sarah Jessica Parker"

thumb_up thumb_down +23

World peace

thumb_up thumb_down +18

Q: What happens when a Jew with a boner runs into a wall? A: He breaks his nose.

thumb_up thumb_down -12

What's the difference between a panda and a baby? I don't have a baby in my freezer

thumb_up thumb_down +3

Q. Why did billy die? A. Becuase everyone dies in life

thumb_up thumb_down -20

Roses are nice, violets are fine, ill be the 6, if you be the 9!

thumb_up thumb_down -4

Why did the boy jump off the building? To get to the bottom.

thumb_up thumb_down -6

A man walks into a bar and orders a beer. But it wasn't as good as he had hoped it would be.

thumb_up thumb_down +44

What do you call a guy with a car on his head? Immediate identification would not be possible. The man would be referred to by his estimated demographics. Circumstantial evidence and dental reports may be required for identification at which points the family's would be notified. Only after this will the man's name would be released to the media who would in turn report this.

thumb_up thumb_down +11

What's worse than finding a fly in your drink? Gonorrhea.

thumb_up thumb_down +22

What do you call Justin Bieber's assassin? A hero doing a noble favor to the community.

thumb_up thumb_down -16

Man goes to doctor, says he's depressed. The world is bleak and hopeless and life just isn't worth living. The doctor thinks for a second then smiles. "Treatment is simple he says, the great clown Pagliacci is in town. Go see him, that should pick you up." The man bursts into tears, sobs hysterically like a child, "But doctor," he says. "I am Pagliacci."

thumb_up thumb_down -45

john liked the paper........ so he took it

thumb_up thumb_down -8

knock knock who's there Steve Go away

thumb_up thumb_down -40

What do a plum and a rabbit have in common? They're both purple, except for the rabbit.

thumb_up thumb_down -3

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops