Wife: Where were you all night. Husband: Cheating on you with your sister

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ur an fagit

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Roses are red Violets are blue I'm random but can still rhyme Hatsune Miku

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lewis bedford

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Knock Knock: There is no one in here! GTFO! Okay, yes sir or mam Moral: I told you there is no one here, gtfo already!

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Eliza eh? Of you I do not know but at least you used the correct code yourself, I suppose Nero7 kept your existence hidden from most of us for a reason. This "point Zero" is no more, about time people got out of the fucking north pole anyways, he was buried there, as his identity and existence is better off kept secret from the outside world for reasons many, none the less because if he is found and identified, undesired company might track whatever loose threads he might have left, straight back to us and we are not exactly operating within the parameters of... Legality anymore. Listen, if you want to know more give me the code straight out (I could not care less about deciphering shit right now and we are leaving horseshit network anyways) And I will tell you what Major6 knows, because as far as the screams roaming these halls can tell, he is still alive, you just better be fast, my men and women are not exactly experts at keeping these people alive... Yet, but enough idle chitchat. If you are who you claim to be, you should have the code I need, bring it, and I will present you with the neccesary information... ...Fail to do so, and I suggest that you never address any of us again fair lady, while we can simply not be tracked down, the security here is... Do I need to say? Neo-Nero.

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A woman goes into the supermarket and buys a single banana, a canned meal for one and some ice cream. While paying for her items, the cashier looks up at her and says "I can tell you're single" "Oh yeah? How'd you know?" The woman asks. "Because you're ugly as fuck." Replies the cashier.

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Jordan is pregant

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What do you call a person rolling down a hill, in a burning car, with a pack of wolves running after him? DEAD!

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What do you get if you have a bundle of children's clothing, some moisturising cream, a gas mask, a lollipop, more candy and a bag? A disguise.

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My Bologna has a first name, it's Tim.

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Why is Andrew sleeping? Because he took and overdose on sleeping pills, he probably died in his sleep.

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YO mama so stupid, when she got hit by a bus she said WHO THREW THAF ROCK AT ME.

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Why was King Triton mad at Ariel? Her grades were under the C.

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What did the fish say after he

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Most adults can swim. Current government studies are investigating similar skills in babies. With unnecessarily large pools.

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A guy killed his kids and wife Pokémon GO also exists

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How do you get a fat man to drop a brownie? Make fun of him until he kills himself, and then drops the brownie.

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Two cannibals are eating a clown, one says to the other: "Maybe we should rethink our ways of life and realize why animals are on this planet"

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Why did Susie fall off a swing? She had an inner ear infection.

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What did Adam Sandler get for Christmas? Nothing, he's Jewish.

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Knock. Knock. No one is home. Okay.

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Why did the plane crash? Because the pilot had a seizure.

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Why did the Asian woman drive 20mph on the highway? There was a deadly car accident with many fatalities.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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