hmm, thinking, thinking, SNAPPLE!

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Knock Knock Who's there? Frank Frank who? I killed your grandma

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There once was a man from Nantucket, He sailed a boat.

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A man walks into a bar. Of chocolate. Yummy!

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What's the difference between a porsche and a pile of dead babies? I don't have a porsche in my garage.

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3 men were involved in a terrible plane crash. The first man got up, and all he could see was blue. Blue houses, blue cars, blue people. He walked into a house and asked if he could stay there, the kind people complied and let him stay there for the night. When he woke up he could still only see blue. He went down stairs and ate fruit loops, then left in his blue world. The second man got up and all he could see was red. Red houses, red cars, red people. He walked into a house and asked if he could stay there, the kind people complied and let him stay there for the night. When he woke up he could still only see red. He went down stairs and ate cherrieos, then left in his red world. The last man got up, and all he could see was yellow, yellow cars, yellow houses, and yellow poeple. Yet again he walked to a house, and the kind people let him stay the night. Once he woke up, he only could see yellow still. He went down stairs and ate fruit loops and left into his yellow world. So this proves that 2 out of 3 men prefer fruit loops over cherrieos.

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Why was Luke named Luke Skywalker? Because he walks to skies.

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How many Wal-Mart employees does it take to screw in a lightbulb? Just one, assuming he can reach it safely.

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What's black and white and red all over? My dog after she was hit by a car (true story)

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Do you want to hear some bad news? My wife just died Do you want to hear some good news? I'm single

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Why are black people so good at basketball? Dedication and hard work

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How do you kill a 1000 Ethiopians? Throw a biscuit off a cliff. JimBoto

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A blonde is elected President of the United States. Half way through her inauguration speech, she forgets how to read.

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Roses are red Violets are blue We cant have sex I have ED

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When Life throws you lemons you might be hallucinating

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Technically rainbows are white.....and have gold at the end.

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lets bomb africa

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Covert trance, black Ops, and something I kinda made up myself. The first two are basically using suggestions without the victim being aware of it, that is how that famous bank robber that just asks nicely for all the cash and gets it succeeds. The other is tricking the "allmighty" subconcious and again, my own invention people claim its called "this and that", I know, because I coined most of the terms. Anyway, you put people into a deep state of trance, you tell them to take a step forward into the sea, and well, you actually led them down the top of a skyscraper or something fun... "Now... Suck on the lollipop I have between my, okay ill stop"

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Whats the difference between a white guy and a black guy? They have different colors of skin.

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what do You call a white man killing a black man? a accident

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the firefighter says to the other firefighter: hey firefighter, are we going to fight a fire?

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What did the boy with no arms and no legs get for Christmas? Cancer.

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... Chan chan

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Did you know that if you rearrange the letter in "Gill Lube", you can spell "Gullible"?

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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