I love Ciara!

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Knock Knock? Who's There? The Gestapo.

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What is worse then finding an apple in your worm? Not a lot.

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Who lives in a pineapple under the sea?! No one... pineapples float.

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Q: What is worse than loosing your arms? A: Dying

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Why didn't Jimmy's mum come to the school play? She had a heart attack

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What do you call flashlight in an Asian kids room what ever the brand is

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Chuck Norris was once engaged by a woman for whom he had to fight a man to obtain all while doing a mundane activity in an unorthodox manner. He promptly declined for he is married and told the man he only fights for self-defense. He proceeded to put his pants on one leg at a time like everybody else.

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How many frogs does it take to change a light bulb None. Frogs lack the cranial capacity to change said lightbulb. If eventually by evolution they become smart enough to change lightbulbs, they may learn to handle machinery and pose a real threat to humans

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Whats green and smells like ass? My ass. I lied about the green..

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What is similar about a goose and newly weds? They both aren't chairs

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A gay man named pat played on a gay website with a child named Charlie

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Three men are on a plane. (Note, that this is a low-altitude plane, in which they are allowed to open the windows) The stewardess offers the first man refreshments. He asks for an orange. The stewardess agrees, on one condition: that he throws it out the window. Confused, the man complies, and upon receiving his orange, he throws it out the window. The stewardess moves on to the second man, who asks for an apple. The stewardess agrees, on one condition: that he throws it out the window. Also confused, the man complies, and upon receiving his apple, he throws it out the window. Finally, the stewardess moves onto the third man, who asks for a bomb. Without question, the stewardess agrees, on one condition: that he throws it out the window. With no reaction, the man receives the bomb, then throws it out the window. Upon landing, the first man sees a woman crying. With a sympathetic heart, he asks what's the matter. She replies, "I was walking down the street, and an orange came from the sky and hit me in the head." The man brushes the event off as a coincidence. The second man sees another woman crying. Upon asking her what's the matter, she replies, "I was walking down the street, and an apple came from the sky and hit me in the head." The man, confused, apologizes and walks away. The third man sees a woman hysterically laughing. Intrigued, he inquires her jolly. She manages to state through her hysteria, "When me fart, me whole house blow up!"

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Got tired of McDonalds Jim?

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What did the shark say to the boat captain? So do you prefer cards or pool?

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a priest and a jewish guy walk into a bar. they both drink as expected and go home to their families

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Knock, Knock. Who's there? It's the police, they ask the questions.

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Knock knock. Who's there? Not your grandma! Cause she's dead! Come to the funeral

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Ross Tumilty is gay 8===D

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what did the 3 year old get for her birthday? nothing she died of terminal cancer at the age of 2

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Why didn't little jimmy take out the trash? He is a rock

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Why did the plane crash? Because the pilot was a loaf of bread.

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How do you kill a blond? You don't. If you do, you'll get reported to the cops and sent to jail.

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Q: What is worse than seven babies in a trash can? A: One baby in seven trash cans. Q: What is worse than one baby in seven trash cans? A: The Holocaust.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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