What is brown and sticky? A stick.

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Why did 0 dislike 1? Because 1 made 0 feel like he was nothing

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How do you make a plumber sad? You kill his family.

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What is the best anti joke? Dunno cant think of one

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Why did Piglet look in the toilet? He was probably fascinated by the flush.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? To get to the other side.

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What did the say to the host of the pool party after he pooped? Mr. TImmons! There is chocolate in the pool!

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roses are red violets are blue tulips are white daisies are yellow

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Why didn't the lttle boy fasten his seatbelt? It doesn't matter, it's too late now.

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why did the elephant cross the road? It was the chickens day off

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Why is 3 less than 4? To get to the other side

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Roses are red Violets are blue I've got to say I hate you!

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Knock-Knock who's there? Artichoke Artichoke who? Your friend Artie choked on a ham sandwich, and I'm sorry to inform you that he didn't survive.

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How do I want to die? From Chuck Norris killing me, that would be an honor.

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say it ten times fast: oh

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So three philosophers walk into a bar. Is it necessarily the case that they walk into a bar?

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What's worse than finding a fly in your coffee? The holocaust. What's worse than that? Two flies in your coffee.

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Wanna hear a joke? 9-11

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If at first you don't succeed, there's a very substantial probability that you failed.

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#If you go down in the woods today, your sure of a big surprise #If you go down in the woods today, you better go in disguise. # I don't know why, I started typing this out and realized I couldn't actually come up with a suitable concluding line.

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One cow, determined to make a difference in the world, gets killed in a meat packing plant. We killed him, and we killed his dreams.

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How did Chris die? Bush-fire

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Your mama's so dumb, she don't even know it.

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What's worse than biting into a worm and finding an apple? Why would you bite into a worm?

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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