Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? Because it was dead. Why did the chicken fall out of the tree? Because it was stapled to the monkey.

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What's easier than taking candy from a baby? Almost nothing.

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How do you make a salesperson cry? Shoot him in the face and throw him off a cliff

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Viciously beating your children with other recently beaten children.

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what's black? a lot of things.

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Q: why did the chicken cross the road A: you are adopted

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Steve Jobs didn't die. He went to go set up iCLOUD.

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Nobody walks into a bar. So nothing happens.

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What did the paraplegic boy get for christmas? Nothing. He's Jewish.

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Knock Knock Who's There No-one your not very popular

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a. johns friend said your a towel b. rick replied im obivously not a towel and walked away in discust at his friends stupidity.

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What is grey and cannot fly? A parking lot.

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why do elephants have such flat feet.....? from all those damn trees they have been juming out of....

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How did the man want his hair cut? In silence.

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There's two bears in a bathtub, One looks at the other and says "hey can you pass the soap?" the other bear says "what do i look like a light bulb?"

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What happened to Timmy went to get ice cream from the ice cream truck? He was raped and never seen again, his family now mourns there loss

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What did the black man say to the white man? Nothing. He punched him in the face and stole his iPhone.

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A Polar Bear walks into a bar and says to the barman: "Barman! Give me a whiskey and ............................................................coke." The barman says: "Why the big pause?" to which the Polar bear replies: "Well uhm my father had big paws"

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100% of smokers die 100% of people die I am tied to a tree

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HaHaHaHa... Was the last joke funny? Ya, well this ones not.

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want a balloon? yeah

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A man buys free health care...

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Roses are red violets are blue i got two fingers just for you/by kw

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A dog walks into a bar and succumbs to heartworm.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops